Dan Savage goes off on someone who “loves the Lord and does not support gay marriage” but was “heartbroken” to hear about the male Rutgers student who committed suicide after his sexual encounter with another male student was livestreamed over a webcam by some other students.
Being told that they’re sinful and that their love offends God, and being told that their relationships are unworthy of the civil right that is marriage (not the religious rite that some people use to solemnize their civil marriages), can eat away at the souls of gay kids. It makes them feel like they’re not valued, that their lives are not worth living. And if one of your children is unlucky enough to be gay, the anti-gay bigotry you espouse makes them doubt that their parents truly love them—to say nothing of the gentle “savior” they’ve heard so much about, a gentle and loving father who will condemn them to hell for the sin of falling in love with the wrong person.
“Love the sinner but hate the sin” gets a big old pass on the American political scene, even though in practice it’s a distinction without a difference.