Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Authoritarian republicans are opposed to freedom for the rest of us.

Let’s finish the job.

Republicans are radicals, not conservatives.

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

Nancy smash is sick of your bullshit.

Usually wrong but never in doubt

Ah, the different things are different argument.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Jesus, Mary, & Joseph how is that election even close?

But frankly mr. cole, I’ll be happier when you get back to telling us to go fuck ourselves.

Nothing worth doing is easy.

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

Prediction: the GOP will rethink its strategy of boycotting future committees.

DeSantis transforms Florida into 1930s Germany with gators and theme parks.

Whoever he was, that guy was nuts.

rich, arrogant assholes who equate luck with genius

Just because you believe it, that doesn’t make it true.

Republicans seem to think life begins at the candlelight dinner the night before.

Historically it was a little unusual for the president to be an incoherent babbling moron.

Is it negotiation when the other party actually wants to shoot the hostage?

It’s always darkest before the other shoe drops.

Republicans do not pay their debts.

Happy indictment week to all who celebrate!

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Simma Down Na

by | 88 Comments

This post is in: 

I think the blog, as a whole, needs this:

Why can’t we all just get along.

*** Update ***

BTW- went shopping with my mom today, and stopped by the liquor store to pick up a couple items for the bar I have been slowly stocking over the past few months (I’m basically done except for some liqueurs and odds and ends). When I got back in the car, mom asked what I got, and I told her a bottle of Grand Marnier, some Creme de Menthe, and some sherry, and she said “Sherry? Who drinks that? I thought the only people who drank sherry were old British women reading mystery novels with their nine cats.”

I’m so looking forward to putting her in a home.

Reader Interactions

88Comments

  6. 6.

    Cris

    I can’t just get along because Michael D. said I’m a lot less smart than I think I am. Michael Fucking D! Damn I’m hurt.

  11. 11.

    Hunter Gathers

    You’re no fun anymore.

    This place isn’t exactly Wonkette, you know. Well, it might be, but without all the jokes about butt sex and Sarah Palin’s offspring.

  13. 13.

    lamh32

    OK, What’s going on? I can’t read the blogs until I get home from work (my company has “enhanced” the internet security, so darn near anything other than google is flagged), but I’ve seen references to “fee fees” all day, what’d I miss, I don’t feel like going back an reading the older threads! I’m lazy that way…lol!

    Anyhoo, I really think this is cool. Can anyone imagine ANY Repub/Conserv pol recording an “It Gets Better Video”. Someone said, this is like a “tourist” video for LGBT.

    UK PM David Cameron’s It Gets Better Video

  17. 17.

    dollared

    Imagine – a guy as sweet-tempered as John Cole, always with a kind word and a patient expression on his face for the slightly dim-witted, never uttering a bad word about anyone, no matter how justified – imagine himself suddenly and inexplicably surrounded by a snarling bunch of sarcastic terriers gnawing on each other with sharp-edged inside jokes and ruthlessly exposing each other’s erroneous zones.

    Really, it’s just inexplicable. And so unfair to our sainted John.

  22. 22.

    kdaug

    @dollared: I saw what you did there… but thread-jumping is a bitch. So if you HAVE actually seen JC’s face, and have the photos to prove it, do tell.

  23. 23.

    Richard Fox

    I realize my own singing voice matches this beaming Lothario in both quality and timbre. (Rather I have been made to understand this very forcefully by those close to me.) No You tube moments as a result of this awareness, but heartening to see others plugging along for the sake of their art. Excelsior!

  26. 26.

    lamh32

    I know David Frum is a lying conniving Repub, but I do like his Sarah Palin takedowns. This one from today is pretty good:

    Takedown of the day, from David Frum, on Sarah Palin’s Tweet asking whether the leaking of excerpts of her new book might be illegal:

    To which the answer is: actually, no it’s not. And the fact that Sarah Palin believes it might be is reason number 5,417 why she should be allowed nowhere near the police power of the United States.

  27. 27.

    handy

    @lamh32:

    Going by the kinds of comments posted on a daily basis, somebody’s always getting their “fee fees” hurt apparently. I’m certain mine are getting hurt as I type this. Which is a shame, because I’d much rather my knickers be in a bundle or my Cheerios soaked in piss. *shrug*

  28. 28.

    dollared

    I have not seen his face, but his mom has, and she how she treats him….

    and sorry about the jump. my erroneous zone is getting to threads too late.

  35. 35.

    Suffern Ace

    O.K. Now I love everybody, at least somewhat. I won’t even spoil the mood by naming those who I love the least.

  36. 36.

    Nethead Jay

    Huh, is there any thread in particular that’s burning?

    If it’s about Mike Kay’s raising himself from beneath the bridge… People, ignore the bleating. He’s a troll and as such is only interested in riling up people. It’s not worth the energy.

  38. 38.

    schrodinger's cat

    John [email protected] top

    I thought the only people who drank sherry were old British women reading mystery novels with their nine cats.”

    Well you are off to a good start, you already have one cat and the sherry.

  42. 42.

    ruemara

    Burned by your mom. Harsh. But effective. So, when’s the gender change and trans-atlantic move scheduled?

  43. 43.

    morzer

    The manhood of Spain will rise in outrage when they learn of the views espoused by Cole’s maternal unit. Also too, one can cook with sherry. Mushrooms fried in butter and garlic, with a spritz of medium sherry, are the best.

  45. 45.

    eemom

    I thought the only people who drank sherry were old British women reading mystery novels with their nine cats.”

    I have that problem with bloody marys — nobody except old WASPy ladies and hapless hung over-ers. I just like tomato and spice, ferfucksake.

    As for sherry, it is evident that Mama Cole never watched “Frasier.”

  48. 48.

    morzer

    @Mnemosyne:

    I think we are Tunch’s Free Radicals. Or was that last week’s nom de guerre? I am sure it’s all in Chairman Cole’s Little Black Book.

  50. 50.

    shortstop

    Cool Spaniards drink sherry. But they’re so much cooler than Cole that he lands squarely in the no man’s land between old sherry-drinking ladies and hip Spanish sherry drinkers, thus proving his mom’s point.

  52. 52.

    Elizabelle

    Here’s a good problem to have: Mark Twain autobiography is flying off the shelves. Twain himself asked it not be published until 100 years after his death.

    http://www.nytimes.com/2010/11/20/books/20twain.html?hp=&pagewanted=all

    Most of the content was dictated to Twain’s stenographer in the four years before he died, at 74 in 1910. It is more political than his previous works, by turns frank, funny, angry and full of recollections from his childhood, which deeply influenced books like “Huckleberry Finn.”

    A younger generation of readers is discovering Twain for his political writings, [bookstore owner] Ms. Fitting said. “He’s surprisingly relevant right now,” she added. “When you look at how much he wrote and the breadth of the subjects he wrote about, you know that if he were alive today, he would totally be a blogger.”

    Something to read with that sherry, and with or without the cat menagerie.

  53. 53.

    shortstop

    @morzer: No, no, he falls into neither group, both of which have an excuse for drinking sherry. This makes him as big a dork as his mom says. Not that he doesn’t have other charms, but I’m just sayin’.

  54. 54.

    morzer

    @shortstop:

    I think I need another glass of sherry before embarking on extended contemplation of Cole’s charms. Anyway, I am sure Cole appeals mightily to the sherry-drinking old women of the world. They might even be his core demographic…

  57. 57.

    shortstop

    @morzer: Understandable. You’ll never catch me recommending that anyone here engage in extended contemplation of anything on a Friday eve. I am making my grocery list for the non-perishables for Thanksgiving dinner, and then the third baseman and I will go buy them. On a Friday night. Don’t hate me ’cause I’m glamorous.

  58. 58.

    morzer

    @shortstop:

    I am thinking of how I need to go into town and buy some wrapping paper and a nice card and a bottle of something around 20% proof and complete my preparations for my wife’s birthday on Sunday.

  59. 59.

    Tunch

    “I thought the only people who drank sherry were old British women reading mystery novels with their nine cats.”

    Did your mother just call me fat?

  60. 60.

    JenJen

    Seriously, sherry? I’m with mom. What on earth is that for?

    You shoulda picked up a bottle each of Bailey’s and Kahlua to go with that Grand Marnier. B-52 Party sounds like the best idea evuh!!

    (Oh, and a bar spoon so you can float the layers properly)

  62. 62.

    SRW1

    Your mom obviously senses what you’re up to. And that is because your mom always is the person you can fool none of the time.

  63. 63.

    shortstop

    You know, JC’s taking a lot of flak on the sherry thing, and no one has pointed out that creme de menthe is generally only served in bowling alley bars and at Sun City card games.

  64. 64.

    dollared

    @general Stuck,

    That’s why despite my atheism I’ve kept the Catholic option alive. Under RC rules, you can ask all you want, and if they don’t say yes, it’s not a sin. And if (as they so often do), a woman shows you her erroneous zones when you didn’t ask, it’s only a sin if you acknowledge that it just happened.

  67. 67.

    SRW1

    @dollared:

    The Good Lords tells me that the shepherds of his RC flock don’t know that much about erroneous zones because they have a penchant for analog ones, or something. The connection was a bit poor towards the end.

  69. 69.

    justawriter

    I cook with sherry often. I use it to make duxelles, a sort of preserved mushroom flavored with sherry. It’s a must ingredient for beef wellington and my sister says she’s never found anything that doesn’t taste better with duxelles and sour cream.

  70. 70.

    asiangrrlMN

    Ah, Cole. You really ARE a crotchety old lady with ten cats in England, aren’t you? Funny.

    @MikeL: Ha! That’s funny. Him more liberal, my ass. Why doesn’t he come here and say that?

    Good lord. The mess in this house, Cole. Time for some nekkid mopping, methinks.

  73. 73.

    stickler

    Justawriter is right. Sherry in a glass is usually pretty unimpressive. But sherry deglazed in the sauce you just cooked chanterelles/scallops/pork loin … well, that’s something else entirely.

    The good stuff is OK to drink, I guess, though outside of the occasional “one glass for the pan, one for the cook,” I don’t know of anyone who actually drinks it intentionally.* But the right stuff? In the right sauce? Mmmm.

    * (THIS BIT SHOULDN’T BE IN BOLD IT SHOULD JUST HAVE AN ASTERISK JUDAS FREAKING PRIEST FYWP) I don’t know any elderly English matrons. Yet.

  74. 74.

    morzer

    @stickler:

    Tapas, dear boy, tapas! Sherry is the nectar of the gods, and tapas their ambrosia.

    I shall now put up a large border fence around myself and save the free world from my morally dubious Hispanic foodie tastes.

  78. 78.

    morzer

    My wife says that Professor Elemental has “the wacky spirit of youth”. Seems about right to me. Where is your FB?

  83. 83.

    asiangrrlMN

    @morzer: Now, you must die. Because you have spoken HIS name. By the way, the movie was excellent. The best of the lot. Though, not enough Snape, but there is never enough Snape. There was one hellacious scene with Bellatrix and a whip–I gasped out loud.

  86. 86.

    shortstop

    Love Snape and Rickman. The third baseman and I are attending the midnight show. When I asked him to do this and he said, to my total surprise, “Sure,” I felt much like Liz Lemon being addressed by Astronaut Mike Dexter: “See you later, Liz; hope you enjoyed the kissing and the genuine interest in the TV dance competition.”

  88. 88.

    Cheri

    I just had a flashback from younger years after reading the liqour store story:) My stepmom’s mother was joining our dinner one night…picture and old, crotchity, fiesty New Yorker..(no slight intended to Ny’ers..I love the ballsy-ness)After dinner, she was asked if she wanted some after dinner drink..creme de mint, sambuca, Harvey’s Bristol Cream? Her eyes lit up, she chose the Harvey’s..when my dad said, ” That looks pretty good, can I have some?” She shot back,” Sure, you can lick the cork!” That makes me laugh even now…hope you have THAT kind of fun with your new liqour assortment!

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