Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

We need to vote them all out and restore sane Democratic government.

The republican speaker is a slippery little devil.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires.

Accountability, motherfuckers.

Pessimism assures that nothing of any importance will change.

Historically it was a little unusual for the president to be an incoherent babbling moron.

Putin dreamed of ending NATO, and now it’s Finnish-ed.

Never give a known liar the benefit of the doubt.

Bad news for Ron DeSantis is great news for America.

Baby steps, because the Republican Party is full of angry babies.

Polls are now a reliable indicator of what corporate Republicans want us to think.

Another missed opportunity for Jamie Dimon to just shut the fuck up.

FFS people, this was a good thing. take the win.

Never forget that he train is barreling down on Trump, even as he dances on the tracks.

There is no compromise when it comes to body autonomy. You either have it or you don’t.

Republicans can’t even be trusted with their own money.

When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it.

Republicans don’t want a speaker to lead them; they want a hostage.

This year has been the longest three days of putin’s life.

Balloon Juice has never been a refuge for the linguistically delicate.

Give the craziest people you know everything they want and hope they don’t ask for more? Great plan.

These days, even the boring Republicans are nuts.

Accused of treason; bitches about the ratings. I am in awe.

At some point, the ability to learn is a factor of character, not IQ.

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Pro Business Advice

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I have now been on hold for 42 minutes with a business, trying to resolve an issue with a product, and I am not going to complain about the length of the hold, because I have them on speaker phone and I can work while waiting, and I understand at certain times of the year, businesses are really busy.

On the other hand, requiring me to listen to Paul McCartney’s Wonderful Christmastime four times in 42 minutes amounts to cruel and unusual punishment. Don’t do it.

Reader Interactions

105Comments

  5. 5.

    Cliff

    it’s much more entertaining to listen to Bernie Sanders pull off a Real filibuster … he’s still going!!!

    At 7:30 AM PST, Bernie Sanders began a filibuster of the tax compromise. The longer he goes, the better he gets. You can watch the stream on CSPAN2.

    http://www.c-span.org/Watch/C-SPAN2.aspx

  7. 7.

    neil

    The least they could do is alternate it with Keith Richards’ version of “Run, Run Rudolph” to help counteract the sugar-shock.

  12. 12.

    Amir_Khalid

    Don’t you especially love it when they make you hang there o the line forever and three days, then they tell you “Your call is important to us?” Your call is important, but apparently your time is not.

  13. 13.

    MikeJ

    It would be so much better if they simply said, hey, it’ll be an hour and a half before anybody can talk to you, how about we call you back then.

  14. 14.

    joe from Lowell

    Ba-woing-woing-woing-woing-woing-woing-woing!

    Ba-woing-woing-woing-woing-woing-woing-woing!

    It makes me happy the first time I hear that song during the holiday season. I feel nothing the second time. My shoulders start clenching the third.

    Ba-woing-woing-woing-woing-woing-woing-woing!

  15. 15.

    JenJen

    Simply! Having! A wonderful Christmastime!!

    Hey, it’s better than that “Feed The Squirrels” song by Band Aid from the 80’s. Isn’t it?

  16. 16.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    I won’t put Christmas music on the call center hold music at work because it isn’t fair to anyone that has ever worked in retail.

    Frankly, by the time Christmas is over, I’m glad they killed Jesus.

  17. 17.

    zmulls

    On an internal conference call service our work uses, when we are on hold waiting for the call to begin we get a recorded message.

    “Thank you for holding. Your call has not begun yet. Music will play while you wait.” (Or WTTE)

    1) No music ever plays

    2) The message repeats about every 30 seconds, like Chinese Water Torture

  20. 20.

    Boudica

    @Cliff: I want to move back to Vermont just so Bernie can be my senator (rather than these 2 Texas idiots I’ve got now). Credit my years at Middlebury College in Vermont for making me a flaming lefty.

    ETA: Bernie is on Fire!

  26. 26.

    Southern Beale

    In other news, I’m told that C-SPAN is airing Bernie Sanders’ fillibuster. He’s apparently doing it old-school, “Mr. Smith Goes To Washington” style.

    GOP only have to pretend to do their filibusters. How is that possible?

  27. 27.

    cathyx

    I’ve been on hold with music that didn’t come in very well, like a station that wasn’t quite tuned in properly. Now that’s torture.

  28. 28.

    Comrade Javamanphil

    Best thing I get to do is fill in the Bernie Sanders bubble every six years. (Used to be every two of course.)

    And if they play The Christmas Shoes I believe you are allowed to destroy your phone and the company that put you on hold must buy you a new one.

  29. 29.

    Sue

    @Gus:
    Not yet, I think. It seems he mentions everyone else, though. His comments on the people he admires are wonderful, frank admiration coming from someone who’s really famous in his own right. His writing about how he finds his way around music (like discussion of how he found various sounds) is really interesting and probably moreso if you know music at all, which I don’t.
    I really recommend the book. Get past the first 100 pages and you won’t be able to put it down.
    And I’m not even a fan.

  30. 30.

    THE

    Since I celebrate Isaac Newton’s birthday on the 25th December
    as the savior of mankind who saved us from ignorance.

    I wish I could get a plastic apple tree to decorate instead of freakin firs.
    It’s not even winter in my part of the world.
    I want a midsummer apple-tree.

  34. 34.

    Roger Moore

    @Southern Beale:

    GOP only have to pretend to do their filibusters. How is that possible?

    The rules changed. It used to be that you could pass cloture with a vote of 2/3 of the members present. That meant the group that was mounting the filibuster either all had to be present to defeat the motion or had to maintain the floor for long enough to get the whole group back. If they weren’t there and lost the floor, the other party could quickly motion for cloture.

    Now, a cloture motion requires 3/5 the total membership, not just of the Senators present. So as long as the other side only has 59 votes for cloture, you only need one Senator present at any time- and he or she doesn’t need to hold the floor- to deny unanimous consent to prevent a vote.

  35. 35.

    joe from Lowell

    @eemom:

    thanks. Now I have a new earworm to replace Gladys Knight from the last thread.

    I had this stuck in my head for about thirty years the third week of November.

    Here’s lookin’ at you, kid!
    (Here’s lookin’ at you, kid!)

  37. 37.

    Suck It Up!

    So I see that Sanders is filibustering (although I read he’s technically not) but Landrieu and brown have joined in and I think that kind of spoils the whole thing as I think the latter two are full of shit.

  43. 43.

    JenJen

    @FlipYrWhig: Actually, I love that song. I was just joshin’. :-)

    (I’m a Midge Ure fangirl forever!)

    @TooManyJens: Thinking back to Cole’s “best thing that ever happened to you” thread, while he’s not the bestest thing evuh, I can’t express how proud I am that Sherrod Brown is my Senator. He’s probably the best (most recent) thing that ever happened to Ohio, that’s for sure.

  45. 45.

    FlipYrWhig

    @THE:

    Since I celebrate Isaac Newton’s birthday on the 25th December

    Dude, are you me? I’ve been telling people that for years!

  46. 46.

    Mike Goetz

    Sanders is doing this on Friday. The vote on the deal is Monday. That should tell you how this is going to go down.

  48. 48.

    liberty60

    I have now been on hold for 42 minutes with a business…

    I am calling bullshit.

    Everyone knows that the Free Market is efficient and responsive to the consumer; John is making it sound like he is dealing with a gummint agency or something.

  51. 51.

    Suck It Up!

    I’ve been wondering. Is this the first time Democrats have been mad and stood up for something or are they getting all this attention because they are mad at Obama?

  52. 52.

    MikeJ

    @Mike Goetz: I’ve got a Bela Fleck xmas album that’s good. And while I don’t care for the first cut, the new Saint Etienne effort, A Glimpse of Stocking, is ok.

    The other rat packers also did decent christmas stuff. Also don’t overlook Carla Thomas Gee Whiz it’s Christmas and All I Want for Christmas is You. Aw hell, that reminds me, the whole Phil Spector Christmas album.

  54. 54.

    Suck It Up!

    @BR:

    From Think Progress:

    While Sanders’ stand is not technically a “filibuster” — there are no votes scheduled for today that he is delaying, so it does not meet the procedural requirement for being one

  55. 55.

    BR

    @Suck It Up!:

    I think this was a pretty central plank of Obama’s campaign platform that he’s given up here.

    I was looking at Obama’s promises from 2007-2008, and he really has delivered on almost everything he promised. But one of those things was expiring the Bush tax cuts.

  58. 58.

    Pangloss

    “Merry Christmas, Darling” by The Carpenters is many times worse. You need an insulin injection midway through it.

  60. 60.

    freelancer

    Bernie Sanders seconds ago (I’m paraphrasing here):

    “No more complaints about the national debt, from the GOP. Not on the floor of the Senate. Your hypocrisy will be known to allNO MORE. Just say ‘Rich people donated to my campaign, I gotta do what they want.’ That would be honest.”

    I love this guy.

    Fuck yeah.

  63. 63.

    Suck It Up!

    @BR:

    yeah, but he promised not to raise taxes on the middle class and the Republicans would have slammed with it. And I’m not only concerned with Republicans but the NYT even called it a raise in taxes. He broke his promise but I think voters will appreciate that he got up on live tv and said, ‘yeah I broke my promise, but here’s why’.

    Honestly I’m not upset about it because I don’t expect politicians or people in general to keep all their promises. Like you said, he’s kept a lot of them.

  65. 65.

    beltane

    @freelancer: I wish the Democrats would talk like that. Plain speech that speaks the truth is the only thing that can cut through the media bullshit.

  66. 66.

    artem1s

    @JenJen:

    I’m glad Sherrod finally came around and had a come to Jeebus moment with his progressive roots. He sent me a fairly milquetoast response to my complaint that the Dems didn’t deal with taxes before the election. I was pretty depressed about it. Relieved that maybe there is one OH representative in office who isn’t batsh*t crazy TP wingnut. Kasich is going to strike the final blow on the stake that Taft and his group drove into the heart of this state.

    progressive dems may lose on this but at least someone is getting the real info about our objections on the record first.

    the permanent extension thing… I have been saying that since they put it in place. No such thing as a temporary extension.

  67. 67.

    Nutella

    Could be worse. I had to listen to Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer while eating at a restaurant on Dec 1.

  68. 68.

    FlipYrWhig

    @BR: You know, that’s cool; I would love to see the Congress attempting to be an independent body of the government rather than the gauntlet the president’s proposals have to run. But if they really want to be that, they have to get their fucking act together and figure out how to get things done. No more of this boohoohoo about how they totally would have done it better if only they’d been asked nicely.

  69. 69.

    JenJen

    @FlipYrWhig: Oh, hell to the yes!

    I always knew I liked you.

    @artem1s: More than any one person, or blogger, or commenter, Senator Sherrod Brown has made me reevaluate my own feelings about this “deal.” It’s a work in progress, but you know what? Maybe I was wrong. I’m open to that possibility.

  72. 72.

    FlipYrWhig

    @BR:

    But one of those things was expiring the Bush tax cuts.

    Well, with no deal he’d (most likely) have presided over raising taxes on income under $250K, the absolute antithesis of a much more central plank to the platform.

  74. 74.

    Carol

    You guys are lucky to get real music. I remember when Musak was what you heard on hold. Either that or “beautiful music” stuff with piano and strings, or silence.

    Bad memories.

  76. 76.

    licensed to kill time

    I’d like to say that whoever invented those Christmas light strings that play tinny computerized Christmas songs should be condemned to listen to them forever in purgatory. I also cannot stand the blinking lights. They should just shine on, steady and proud, like crazy diamonds.

    That is all.

  78. 78.

    Comrade Luke

    Sanders is just going off on GE’s hypocrisy, and I have to say: I love the guy, but I’m a bit worried about him. I hope he doesn’t collapse on the floor of the Senate.

    Not even joking. He’s really mad.

  79. 79.

    geg6

    @Culture of Truth:

    Nuhguhhappen.

    Though it would seem this country needs a LOT more Bernie than fucking stupid ass Christmas songs. I don’t care if I never hear another one again.

  80. 80.

    geg6

    @Comrade Luke:

    And now he’s going off on Sysco.

    Damn, wonder if he’ll marry me?

    Edited to add: Calling out Tom Donohue and CofC.

    If Bernie won’t marry me, I’m open to a one night stand.

  84. 84.

    TooManyJens

    Have those two guys been sitting behind him stone-faced the whole time? I wonder who they are.

    Edit: yay, my fax went through. (202) 228-0776. Just FYI.

  85. 85.

    geg6

    Oooooo, Bernie is previewing his next remarks about Citizens United and K Street with more CEOs dissing US citizens as too stupid to hire compared to Indians and Chinese.

  86. 86.

    jl

    Off topic, but relevant to the reactionaries versus science salon BJ has been having today:

    ‘ Or as [Bachmann] puts it, cutting taxes shouldn’t be defined as part of a deficit, and only spending should be viewed through this lens.

    “I don’t agree with that definition,” Bachmann told Meredith Viera on the Today Show. “When people keep their own money, that’s considered a deficit to government, but it’s not a deficit to your pocket or mine, so I think it’s important that people can keep their money.” ‘

    http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2010/12/bachmann-i-dont-think-tax-cuts-should-be-defined-as-a-deficit-video.php?ref=fpb

    So, I guess we have to work on arithmetic and basic logic before we get to science with these people.

    To be fair, Bachmann goes on to say only spending should count as a deficit.

    But on second thought, I am not sure what I mean by ‘To be fair’ since by Bachmann’s line of thinking, I guess there should be no government at all. I guess then her argument is logical. Crazy, but logically consistent.

  87. 87.

    Martin

    Good on Bernie. He should get more Dems to help him out here, not because I think the tax deal is unacceptable, but with an honest-to-god filibuster effort, making the case for, and supporting filibuster reform will get quite a bit more traction among the caucus. And IMO that’s going to be more useful over the next 2 years than anything we gain or lose out of the tax deal.

  88. 88.

    Martin

    @jl:

    To be fair, Bachmann goes on to say only spending should count as a deficit.

    Her head will explode if the Dems start rolling out the notion that taxes lost to deductions are ‘spending’.

  90. 90.

    Jules

    So while Bernie is making my Democratic Socialist heart warm, what does this accomplish?

    Do we really think he can shame the Republicans into voting only for a tax cut for the middle class or an extension of UI?

  91. 91.

    geg6

    @kdaug:

    swap out all Muzac with Bernie’s filibuster. Any hacker volunteers in the house?

    That? Would be fucking amazing. i can haz hacker plez?

  92. 92.

    FlipYrWhig

    @jl:

    “I don’t agree with that definition,” Bachmann told Meredith Viera on the Today Show. “When people keep their own money, that’s considered a deficit to government, but it’s not a deficit to your pocket or mine, so I think it’s important that people can keep their money.” ’

    I’m telling you, I think a _lot_ of people think “the deficit” is something like the total amount of money all Americans owe to their creditors, rather than anything having to do with the government at all.

  94. 94.

    kdaug

    @geg6:
    “…your call is important to us. Please hold.”

    “We MUST break up the too-big-to-fail banks! Right now four institutions own 62% of GDP! The very companies that came to us for bailouts are now shipping your jobs overseas!…”

    Just awesomeness.

  95. 95.

    DaddyJ

    In conversation just the other day, I mentioned that McCartney Christmas tune as the perfect example of how once people reach a certain level of super-stardom they can produce absolute dreck and it won’t affect their reputation. That song really puts the “X” in Xmas.

  97. 97.

    Mnemosyne

    All I had to do was read this post and now I have the fucking song stuck in my head.

    Thanks a lot, John.

  104. 104.

    SectarianSofa

    Damn you, Cole, now you’ve got that song in my head.
    For some reason, my wife doesn’t hate that song, but has fuzzy warm memories of crappy Paul McCartney music from her childhood. I wonder if it sounds better when one is drunk.
    I should ask her. … blahblahblah Christmastime!

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