Let’s get this out of the way as the blessed season approaches: I fucking hate Christmas. I’m not a Christian and Jesus isn’t my friend, so I don’t want to celebrate his birthday. I don’t like shopping and buying shit people don’t need and want. I buy myself everything I want and don’t want any goddam clever gifts. I resent the inconvenience of fighting holiday traffic and listening to awful fucking Christmas music for more than a solid month. As far as I’m concerned, Santa should cram himself in a two wetsuits, jam in a couple of dildos and ho-ho-ho himself to death.
That said, though it may surprise regular readers of this blog, I’m a “normal” happily married guy and therefore I will “celebrate” this fucking holiday with gritted teeth, as per usual. So, here’s a thread to bitch about the holidays. In the meantime, today’s the last day for free shipping on Amazon so I have to do some more fucking shopping.
mr. whipple
I just love your spirit!
Phyllis
I have trimmed my gift-giving down to a bare minimum; the young children of co-workers, token gifts for said co-workers, my hairdresser and the gal who does my nails.
My biggest stressor has been providing a list to the boyfriend. He likes to give romantic gifts such as jewelry, perfume. I have no use for that crap. Give me a natural light reading lamp and an immersion mixer, kthanxbye.
Beyond that, I hear ya. I’m just appalled at the ongoing excess. My boss easily spends 3 to 4000 each Christmas, not only buying for the grandchildren, but major gifts for her grown children (35 and 41). Boggles my mind.
And if I’m aurally assaulted by Madonna’s execrable version of ‘Santa Baby’ one more time, I’m gonna find the bitch and beat her like a rented mule.
aimai
Well, I, too, am not some kind of Christian–or any kind of Christian–but I love saturnalia, as my father calls it, and we celebrate it to the hilt. I mean, not with pictures of the holy family or creches or anything but with a tree, lights, food, presents. I’ve been mixing it up with a christopath (thanks for whoever offered that term) over at Roy Edroso’s Running Scared Blog over at the Village Voice over just this question. She thinks she’s observing and celebrating Christmas by protesting people who (she thinks) don’t like it. The notion that they dont like it arises from the fact that some people prefer their private holidays private and others want to “push them down our throats” with public displays at public expense.
There’s lots to like about Christmas time, and lots to dislike, but the part that I like is the rushing about and the thinking about family and the quiet and cozy times together. Of course I have children, and I love trees and food. So what’s not to like? The thing not to like is the hysterical faux religiosity of the far right which is, apparently, a cover for their intense dislike for their fellow men. Honestly, did you ever think that the very phrase “Merry Christmas” would be used as a club to beat people up over the head? Or that people on a blog (won’t link to it) would actually propose sending someone they hate and have threatened with death Christmas Cards as a way of making her come to her senses? Me neither.
aimai
bcinaz
I’m not a christian either, however, I celebrate and enjoy the paganism of Christmas. The tree, the lights, the presents, the food, and time off work.
p.a.
do you have to hang around with old white people who complain about how oppressed they are while stuffing themselves with enough fucking food to satisfy a third world village for a month like i do? i hope not. of course, this just means i should get off my ass and volunteer in a soup kitchen for the day (at least) instead of just putting up with or complaining about this shit.
Mr. Prosser
“Lighten up, Francis.”
Rommie
What did you do when the Grinch gave all the stuff back to Whoville? I can hear the Darth Vaderish NOOOOOOOOO echoing from the past, heh.
I don’t hate the holiday season, but it’s not the most wonderful time of the year either. It just is, and is the start of 4 months of cold weather.
Comrade Javamanphil
I hate how ambiguous and wimpy everyone on this blog has become. I blame Rahm.
Favorite part of Christmas for us: the family (2 males, 2 females) belts out Fairytale of New York with the boys singing Shane and the girls singing Kirsty (RIP still miss you.) Nothing like having your daughter sing you are a scumbag and a maggot (figure the next line won’t make the moderation filter.)
Michael
I’m cranky, too, and am also suffering the Icepocalypse.
In honor of my crankiness, I’m offering up the following observations and suggestions to people, generated from my near half-century of experience:
1. For young dads aged 17-26, yes, that girl you knocked up is an unrelentingly selfish, greedy, controlling bitch. Even so, everything that she says about you is correct – you would forget to feed the baby if you had overnights, would leave the child in the car when you went to clubs and strip joints, and would refuse to change the diapers during an 18 hour long session of Halo. Suck it up, you’ll both change.
2. For young mothers aged 17-35, no, you can’t control every aspect of what he does when he has the children. He’s entitled to his time, too, and you don’t get to bitch unless he’s letting the kid sleep in the pit bull breeding operation in the backyard.
3. For the grandparents of children who are being raised by a single mom, the judge really doesn’t care on a personal level about where the child spends Christmas Day, where the child wakes up on Christmas Day, or whether Christmas Day is divided into a precisely equal set of hours. The lawyers and bailiffs don’t care either, except to the extent that the squabbles result in extra money. Convert to Judaism and celebrate Hanukkah, it is much easier.
4. For middle aged men up to the age of 60, your wife will act like a complete bitch if you forget to be nice and wander around grumpy all the time. Get off of conservative commentary websites, don’t mention the latest pearl of wisdom from Limbaugh, Beck or O’Reilly when you’re going to bed, going on vacation, going to see her family or eating breakfast, and she might blow you occasionally. Who knows, it may strip that ridiculous fantasy you have that young women still find you interesting.
5. For women from the ages 38-80, nobody really gives a shit about your random gripes, complaints, irritations or annoyances. Do us all a favor and shut the fuck up about what bothers you – you might think it empowering, but for everybody else, it is just plain irritating. If you stop bitching, maybe you’ll get some niceness from the men in your lives.
Grumpily yours….
mistermix
@Mr. Prosser: Go buy yourself a Kackel Dackel.
DearOldDad
I too do not do the god thing..but I do like the trees, lights and parties. I realize the real ‘reason for the season’ is the Solstice…it may not be a mystery but it is a miracle :-)
merrinc
I’m a heathen too but I like Christmas. I like decorating, baking, searching for new versions of old holiday songs, and buying gifts for my kids, spouse, and mother. I even like attending the candlelight service at the nearby UMC because it’s not Jesus I have a problem with, it’s fucking Christianists.
Here’s my newest holiday pet peeve: why do people with whom I have only a business relationship send me Christmas cards? The guy who cleaned the carpets in our old house sent me a card. My husband’s prosthetist sent him a card as did a company he did some contracting work for 6 years ago. All went immediately into the recycling bin.
Josie
For me the reason for the season is family and traditions. I have great memories of the way my family did things when I was growing up and hope that my children (all grown) have equally good memories of our Christmas traditions. I felt very successful when my 28 year old son came home last Christmas and wanted to make a gingerbread house to take to his future in-laws. We spent the next two days carefully planning and constructing it, just as we had done in years past, and it was wonderful.
Buck
I thought Sears, Target, Overstock.com, etc., were the reason for the season.
Jesus?
TR
@aimai:
If she thinks the central message of Christianity is “Fight, fight, fight for the Prince of Peace!” then she’s not a Christian. In the slightest.
The Grand Panjandrum
I’m into for the booze, food, and watching people say how much they love shit you KNOW they hate. Nothing like watching all those forced smiles and gritted teeth. It makes my day. Well, that and the booze.
rageahol
I find nothing of value in christmas or the “holiday season.”
I generally just hole up in my apartment for a month because i cant stand all the goddamn christmas music.
Svensker
I love Christmas. Always have, always will. And I don’t get stressed out by it at all. Just love the lights and the food and the tree and the wonderful music! Am seeing a production of Messiah tomorrow with baroque instruments in Toronto and am so looking forward to it. Gloriousness!
Captain Haddock
I love this time of year – the music (most of all), the family, the friends, the nostalgia, etc.
It is my favorite time of year in all ways.
scav
The one thread where people are supposed to be grumpy and look at it. . . heathen and, on the whole, rather chipper in a cranky sort of way.
rdldot
I’m glad I’m not the only humbug around. The only thing I like about Christmas is the tree. I’d have one year-round with varying decorations if anyone sold them.
gelfling545
Well, contrary to the trite saying, Jesus is NOT the reason for the season. Practically every culture has had some solstice celebration -“Hey guys, the sun’s not gone!” Some thanked their deity and some just went out and partied and a lot of our so-called Christian traditions date from those festivals. Nobody has any clue when Jesus of Nazareth was born and if there really were “shepherds abiding in the fields” it was probably not December so console yourself with the fact that this really has nothing to do with Christianity.
Dennis SGMM
I always enjoyed a Navy Christmas, “A good ship, a good crew. Merry Christmas and turn to.”
I don’t hate the thing, I just don’t appreciate it. My wife loves the trappings; tree, decorations, Christmas carols. She’s not into presents but, we have enough decorations to fill a fourteen foot box van. I love her loving it so I keep my “Bah, humbugs!” to myself.
DecidedFenceSitter
I hate Christmas – it is like Thanksgiving (good food) but with added stress of giving gifts and cold/snow.
At least now, I’ve got a system, for everyone who I want to remember, they get a gift of almonds that I’ve cooked (this year it is mostly wasabi nuts, and cinnamon sugar nuts); and immediate family gets one or two gifts.
My wife, alas, really loves Christmas. So I too suffer. My ex and I used to give each other the gift of no gifts on Christmas and thus reduced stress.
PeakVT
What annoys me about the “holiday season” is that it’s become so rushed that it’s a relief when it’s over. I’d like to see Thanksgiving moved up to a few weeks, or even to the end of October. That would spread out the stress of travel and visiting in-laws so people could recover in between. Plus we wouldn’t have to hear about motherfucking Black Friday anymore.
jsfox
Nothing like a good old fashion Bah Humbug in the morning to get your day off on the right foot.
Omnes Omnibus
One of my favorite parts of Christmas is the anticipation of seeing the look on someone’s face when they open a well-chosen gift. Sitting there, watching as the person tears open the paper and knowing that the person is going to absolutely love what is in the package, that is what I look forward to. It doesn’t always happen that way, but when it does, it is wonderful.
I love Christmas; all you haters can hate, but I won’t.
Bulworth
Merry effin Christmas, Mistermix!
scav
Gotta admit, it’s a mixed bag. Simply grand music (including the license for legitimately cheesy and goofy nonsense) and then there’s the stuff they inflict in the grocery stores. Opening stuff and discovering your nearest and dearest A) have absolutely no idea who you are and B) absolutely no taste whatsoever (we have a lifetime contest in swapping bad gift stories in my family). It used to be a more benign form of insanity, like a lot of things, it’s gone a little overboard lately. Pine trees inside, I like that bit. Messy, but most pets shed.
geg6
I’m with you, mm. The faux cheer makes me want to puke. The goddam stupid ass music makes me want to buy an automatic weapon. And the fucking religionists and their false piety and stupid creches that they try to force on everyone and screaming about the “holiest day of the year” (WTF is Easter, then?) make me wish I had a nuclear bomb.
That said, I enjoy all the time off that I get, the good food and drink, and the family time very much. But you can take your trees and lights and all that and stick it up your ass (not anyone in particular, especially not you, mm). I refuse to buy into it and proudly do not participate in it.
Tony Alva
This post pretty much sums up the mania on this blog. Generally, with a few exceptions aside and the love of animals most seem to have, it’s a collective of miserable people. Perhaps even clinically depressive so invested in the news cycle and you’re bullshit entrenched positions that all perspective on life’s beauty is lost. How anyone regardless of religious belief can’t find some joy at this time of year (certainly forgiving those truly clinical) is beyond me. You must actually find joy in being miserable. Here’s a tip, turn off the TV/computer and go hangout with friends and family. Find a bar to go hang out in and LIGHTEN up!
If you can’t do that, just stay inside and yell at your TV (“boy that Charlie Brown Chistmas Special pisses me off! Fucking Linus and his bullshit bible verse” you ought hear yourselves sometimes), and keep the Wheaties peeing to yourself.
Merry Christmas to you all!
Linda Featheringill
I’ve always liked Christmas, although the religious aspect seems a little contrived. Then when I moved up north, I realized why people all over the world celebrate it. Winter is a Big Deal is some places and those groups who renew their bonds at the beginning of the season just might have a higher survival rate.
I enjoy buying gifts when I have the money to do so. Many times [like this year] there just hasn’t been the dough available.
And of course I enjoy a good bah humbug. Nice rant.
LGRooney
Fa-la-la-la-la, Go fuck yourself!!
shell goddamnit
Once the tree decorating and present-wrapping starts I am fine. But I do so hate the shopping. Can’t we just make Christmas a feast day? Fuck the stupid forced-consumption. And the stupid Christofacsists too. Just what we need is giving those bastards another excuse for tormenting the rest of us for not doing exactly what they say at all times.
ant
I grew up in a family that were Jehovah’s Witnesses. Christmas was a bitter time all throughout my childhood, and still is, despite my not having gone to the Kingdom Hall in over two decades.
People spend way too much time calculating the balance of the monetary value of the presents they exchange for Christmas. Almost no one understands that the giving of presents is for the benefit of the giver, not the receiver.
The little nuggets of wisdom that are at the heart of Jesus’ teachings, are all but lost in the contemporary culture of America.
And Christmas is stupid.
Larry Signor
@Michael: What you said. It’s 12 F and snowing on 50 chinese pieces of plastic shit some asshole bought one of the half dozen
monstersgrandkids thatdig caverns and torture little crittersplay on the farm. Merry fucking christmas. I got to go to Walmart so I have a chance of being blowed in the next decade.stuckinred
@Dennis SGMM: Here’s our tree from Xmas 68. Another BJ regular commented that it was a great aiming point!
stuckinred
Oh yea, it’s for kids.
Chuck
@Comrade Javamanphil:
I applaud you, sir, and your choice of holiday carols. I maintain that is the finest Christmas song of all time.
aimai
@Linda Featheringill:
Yes, its one of the things I most mourn about global warming–right now we are snowless and probably will be through Christmas. Solstice and Sol worship go hand in hand with a feeling of hunkering down, working together, sharing what there is to get through the lean times to the better times. Plus, children. I like Thanksgiving better because there are no presents at all but I like Christmas fine. Just stay out of stores and malls and don’t watch TV and you’ll be ok.
aimai
Omnes Omnibus
“Every Who down in Whoville liked Christmas a lot, but the Grinch, who lived just north of Whoville – did not.”
Admiral_Komack
@p.a.:
“of course, this just means i should get off my ass and volunteer in a soup kitchen for the day (at least) instead of just putting up with or complaining about this shit.”
I would much rather someone be doing this than incessantly whining about the “commercialization of Christmas”.
I’ll be working this Christmas.
Mike G
I enjoy the office parties, food and getting together with relatives (I have a comparatively wingnut-free set).
I hate buying presents.
The traffic and unfriendly stressed shopping crowds piss me off mightily. And Christmas is the central theme of some of the most insipid songs, television and movies ever made.
Skepticat
I used to really love Christmas, although as I grew older I began to find that it never could meet the emotional expectations we set for it. I also overdid it, trying to fit in five or six celebrations all over a three-state area. Then one Christmas morning my ultraspoiled nephew took a fairly unique gift I’d spent much time and effort to find, gave it a cursory glance and a sullen “Yeah, thanks” before tossing it to the side, and asked what else there was. (See emotional expectations above.)
Now I spend the winter on a very small subtropical island and ignore the holiday completely, though it’s usually yet another excuse for the few of us here to get together for dinner and spirits, Christmas or otherwise.
I do sometimes send new year’s cards to keep in touch with people.
Jean
My husband’s father was an alchoholic who always ruined Christmas. The family dreaded the season every year.
My family’s Christmas was defined by my totally-adored grandmother who spent the holiday with us every year. Christmas to us was magical.
So when I was a young wife, knowing how to “keep Christmas” came naturally to me. My husband was a bystander, but that was OK.
I knew something had changed the year he came home with tree ornaments that he’d made at work. He’d taken paper clips and bent them into different shapes and soldered them together.
From that point on, he “got it.” He got involved in the holidays and loved them, and figured out way to make Christmas special for our son.
So this is my point for Mistermix and the cynical or uninitiated (or clueless, like my husband!) — Christmas has to do with family and family traditions. The commercial part is there, but it’s easy to make it a lesser aspect.
A good Christmas doesn’t happen by itself. It has to be valued and nutured and taught by example.
The paper clip ornaments have been going up on the tree for 35+ years. Unimportant and cheap to outsiders, but valuable to us, a part of our Christmas.
jayjaybear
“The axial tilt is the Reason for the Season” – bumper sticker that would be on my car if I weren’t afraid of vandalism.
Comrade Dread
Someone needs some Who pudding and roast beast.
handsmile
With each passing year, I grow more sympathetic to the seasonal sentiments of Mr. Ebenezer Scrooge. That is, the sentiments expressed before he was traumatized and suffered a psychotic breakdown.
Holiday humbug aside, I consider “A Christmas Carol” one of the finest moral parables in western literature. Do yourself a favor and re-read it sometime soon.
WereBear
Solstice now, Solstice soon, Solstice 4evah!
THAT’S the reason for the season. And I love telling obnoxious Xantians so.
However, I love it; the way we do it. We are too poor (due to being Sick in America) to buy gifts, so the pressure’s off. We do lights in the windows and a little fiber optic tree with the ornaments wired on so it’s fairly kitten-proof (third year running with a tiny one in the house, what are the odds?) And this year, thanks to the fourth year of the treatment that bankrupted us, Mr WereBear feels up to a real celebration.
So this Solstice will be our favorite kind; open house, glug in the crockpot, nibbles available all day long, and alternating Bach and Father Ted on the old iMac which is our CD/DVD player. We will have good friends and happy kitties and a warm house and this year, a bonus, a lunar eclipse.
FSM bless us, every one!
Odie Hugh Manatee
Now that’s a holiday spirit I can agree with!
After the youngest turned teenager we all agreed that we would rather not celebrate Christmas any more. Or at least not in the usual way. We buy each other a few nice things that we really can use and do need, you know, practical stuff. No tree, no shopping sprees, just a nice dinner that evening because we already gave our ‘gifts’ to each other earlier this month.
The wife’s BD is the 20th and mine is the 27th but we don’t celebrate those either. Instead we plan a motorcycle trip each spring and pick new and interesting places to go when the weather is turning nice and then another trip during the summer when the whole family goes.
My wife and our daughter have to deal with shoppers (retail) every day, have come to absolutely hate the holidays and some of the people it brings out. I hear their daily nightmares of dealing with the stupid and sympathize. I run my own business and can tell fuckwads off and to get lost, having done so before and unfortunately will have to do again. They have to suck it up and take it home with them.
I gladly lend them sympathetic ears because I remember when I had to toe the corporate line and be nice to assholes.
Oh, Merry Xmas!
stuckinred
Don’t forget Canned Heat Christmas Boogie
stuckinred
I also loved the Playboy cartoons with all kinds a hot lil numbers in various states of xmas attire!
There’s an app for that!
http://www.playboy.com/magazine/features/classic-christmas-cartoons/classic-christmas-cartoons.html
scav
@stuckinred: Are you my grandfather?
Scott
@handsmile: What you said. I’ve loved “A Christmas Carol” since I was a kid, mainly because I was born a horror nut, and the thing was chock full of ghosts. As a result, I’ve read the thing so often, I can quote vast swaths of Scrooge’s monologues and probably qualify as an expert on it, if only there were some way to get paid for it. :)
As for the rest of the thread — I’m not a Christian either and like Christmas just fine (though I’ll always prefer Halloween). My problem this year is that there’s almost nothing I actually want, and the rest of the family won’t let up on me. I’ve suggested they donate to any charity in my name, and they ain’t havin’ that — they want to get me loot… :/
stuckinred
@Odie Hugh Manatee: My wife’s is the 19th. Mine is the 10th of November and in 66 I stepped across the line at the induction station in Chicago on my 17th. Somehow that always makes for a mixed birthday too.
El Cid
Without Xmas, I’d just lose out on yet one more holiday from work, as well as a good excuse for far-flung family members to re-unite. I think the exchanging of gifts is pretty cool, too, though that’s because in part my family hasn’t been neurotic about the money involved having to be too high. At least, not since all of us have been grown-ups.
Antonius
Mistermix:
Thank you for speaking the truth in my heart.
Cheers,
Antonius
R-Jud
@aimai:
What you said. You can ban the Christmas onslaught from your house, and if you’re lucky enough to have adults in the family who behave like adults, you can pare back the gift giving to food-and-booze based offerings and just get stuff for the kiddies. Plus, Internet shopping! Click, click, click, down the e-chimney comes good St. Nick.
The only sign of Christmas in my house right now is an advent calendar my mother made me and some tubs full of cookies I’m baking, and that’s how it will stay until Dec. 24th.
p.a.
I had my xmas meltdown last night at the post office drive through. Guy in front of me apparently lost all his mail down between the seats and in the drivers footwell. He pulled up to the box at a 45 degree angle, dove down 3 times collecting his mail, couldn’t reach the slot from his window because of the parking angle, and couldn’t open his door enough to get out to put the mail in the slot. After some contortions (as the line behind me grew longer), he managed to mail what was in his hand. Then he went diving AGAIN. He had plenty of room to pull aside and get his act together while allowing the rest of us to do our thing. nuh-uh. Finally I blew my horn once.
“Shut up already!”
He then pulled forward just beyond the mailbox, but stayed in the driving lane. And continued mail-diving.
I mailed my one straggler xmas card, pulled around him and wished him a “Merry Christmas ASSHOLE”.
Dennis SGMM
@stuckinred:
LOL! My last Navy Christmas was the best. I was down in the Mekong Delta (Possibly the least-Christmasy place on earth) and a few days before Christmas a Chinook landed on our helipad and dispensed an eight-foot-tall Christmas tree. Guys made ornaments out of the foil paper from cigarette packs and whatever else fell to hand. The tree was very fresh and it smelled like Home. That got to me.
sal
Lighten up, dude. You sound like the Christians hatin’ on atheism ads on buses. I don’t like pizza, but you can eat all you want.
Omnes Omnibus
@p.a.: I admire your restraint.
greennotGreen
@Jean: Yes.
I live alone and decorate minimally, and I’m a pagan. I love Solstice or Xmas or whatever you want to call it, and I love giving presents. I like spending time thinking about people I care about. Sometimes the gifts I’m happiest about giving were a minimal investment; one year when my nephew wouldn’t give me a list, I told him if he didn’t, I’d give him a Barbie. And I did. Totally Dead Barbie in a black gown and a Barbie pink-lined casket with ads for other Totally Dead Barbies (Roadkill Barbie, Burned to a Crisp Barbie) on the box. I put tons of love in that gift and after it was shipped across the country and opened, the love was just as warm and fresh as when the gift was wrapped. And he loved it.
Another gift that’s easier but more expensive is a gift card for an experience, for example, a restaurant gift card that’s generous enough to cover a meal for the recipient and *friends.*
Maybe if you can’t give gifts with love instead of obligation, you should trim that person from your list.
Meanwhile, I’ll light the candles and the electric lights on my homemade tree and drive the winter darkness away. And we who celebrate with these timeless customs will be happy to accept the thanks of others when the days start getting longer due *entirely* to our efforts. Until then, Happy Holidays!
WereBear
That’s a keeper.
R-Jud
@greennotGreen:
You! Are awesome. That is all.
stuckinred
@Dennis SGMM: Brown Water Navy, that was my AO as well.
FormerSwingVoter
Jeebus has a sad. :(
Paul in KY
I don’t like sending Christmas cards.
I do like The Pixies.
Do like getting & giving presents to my loved ones.
aimai
@WereBear:
Werebear I want to take this opportunity to wish you and Mr. WereBear a really great year. I’ve so enjoyed your comments this year, and I’ve enjoyed learning more about you and your family. You’ve been through the wringer and you deserve every bit of good that can come to you all this year. Your Christmas sounds wonderful. I love open houses and I just had a big Channukah party which included mulled wine in the rice cooker. I think I’ll do it again just for the smell on Christmas Eve.
aimai
Dennis SGMM
@stuckinred:
Not too many of us left these days. I was at NSAD, Binh Thuy. Like most others, I wrote a letter home as soon as I could. My parents were as fond of irony as I was so I wrote, “The climate is bracing and the locals are all glad to see us.”
Years later, my parents both passed away within months of each other. Among their effects I found a box containing every letter I’d written them from Boot Camp to my last day in-country.
Linda Featheringill
@WereBear:
I’m so happy Mr. Wearbear is feeling better!
Merry Christmas to you all [and many more!].
Paul in KY
@stuckinred: Thanks for sharing that. Those boys can twist the strings!
Shell Goddamnit
Oh yeah, another thing I don’t like about Christmas: smug fuckers who tell us that Christmas is all about family and you just need to make it special with your own traditions. Those of us for whom Christmas is indeed all about family, and those of us whose families are bloody nightmares, don’t need that shit. And there’s no need whatsoever for anyone to go to any special effort to make Christmas anything in particular. It’s not really an inherently important religious holiday. It’s not a public, national holiday like Thanksgiving or 4th of July. So, you know, if folks don’t want to put effort into Making Christmas Wonderful, it’s not a personal failing. Rum drinks on a beach, far from family, is perfectly fine. So is the maelstrom of an enormous circle of friends, far from family. So is holing up and cursing the darkness until it finally goes away… hey, it works, usually.
Rathskeller
@Omnes Omnibus: Well said, thanks.
I love the giving and receiving of well-chosen gifts and almost every Christmas song. I hate the excess and materialism and cutting down live trees to stand for a month inside your house. Watching videos of people fighting to get into a Target at 4am is exceptionally sad to me.
My in-laws like Christmas so much that they give “comical” gifts, which are things you don’t like. Say you dislike golf — you might get an instructional video on golf. The humor in it is barely worth a smirk, and the waste inherent in this type of gift is vomitous to me. But I can’t change my in-laws or complain. They are endlessly sweet but clueless. They have too much money to understand anything different.
Dennis SGMM
@Rathskeller:
Tell the in-laws that Ferraris make you nauseous.
Odie Hugh Manatee
@stuckinred:
I bet crossing that line is something you will never forget. I know it was a mess over there but thank you for doing so. While I was against the war I have never been against our service personnel. They’re just doing their job because others were not doing theirs by keeping us out of it in the first place.
I see you got 10 more years on the odometer than I do.
You can have it…lol! :p
stuckinred
@Dennis SGMM: I hear ya. I mostly ran convoy’s from Long Binh to Vinh Long, Can Tho and Sa Dec with the odd stop at Dong Tam. I always admired the swabbies, yall looked so much cooler than the run of the mill dogface remf. My old man was a WW II APD sailor so he had the Blue Star hung out on the front porch just like they did for him. Her kept all my letters from both Korea and the Nam and I wish I had hung on to his back to me.
JPL
I love this site and all the comments.
Happy Holidays!
Marc McKenzie
There, there, mistermix…calm down, all is well. It’s just another day, right?
But, you know, be careful…you might receive a late-night visit from three spirits…
In all seriousness, though, you made some valid points. Still, I’m not as interested in receiving gifts as I am in seeing members of my family.
stuckinred
@Odie Hugh Manatee: I was against it too. Did my best to stop it when I came home at the ripe old age of 19.
Odie Hugh Manatee
@Omnes Omnibus:
At least the guy is still alive, right? ;)
suzanne
I was raised Presbyterian, and am now one of those annoyingly noncommittal agnostic-deist-UU-Cheester Christians who doesn’t believe in Hell and swears a lot, but I have no fucking problem saying that I unabashedly love Christmas. (It doesn’t hurt that I love winter, the colder and darker the better. I’m the only person I know who gets seasonal depression in the summer.) I used to be kind of “meh” on it, but in recent years, I’ve decided to just ignore the parts I hate and rock on with my bad self. I cut back my gift list to my nearest and dearest only, and I try to make gifts (usually food, b/c I love to bake) rather than buy them. Usually I make a charitable donation in my family’s name. I have some snowflake lights (solar-powered LEDs) illuminating my front walk but keep the rest of the decorating private, especially the religious stuff. I don’t send Christmas cards—fuck it, you’re already my Facebook friend, and that means you’ve already seen that I’ve shared video of “Dick In A Box” and “Oi! To The World”—what the fuck do you want a stupid card for? I have grown to really hate the commercialized parts of Christmas, and the older I get, the more I hate shopping, so I just do less of it. And because, despite the fact that I love to taunt matoko_chan, I’m not an asshole, I try to be really inclusive of all the holidays and traditions celebrated around this time of year… lots of “Merry Whatever!”. And, of course, I love spending it with my family, and remembering those who are no longer here to share it.
I have to say that I do find the religious aspect of the holiday fulfilling, though. It’s ironic that the holiday that’s become all about STUFF is really the holiday of delayed gratification—have hope, because the promise will indeed be kept.
aimai
@JPL:
Yeah, we put the cur in curmudgeon. We’re such splitters and refuseniks that we won’t even join in the two minutes hate for Christmas when its launched by a popular front pager. You have to love this contrary bunch.
aimai
aimai
@JPL:
Yeah, we put the cur in curmudgeon. We’re such splitters and refuseniks that we won’t even join in the two minutes hate for Christmas when its launched by a popular front pager. You have to love this contrary bunch.
aimai
dcdl
@Josie: That’s why I love Christmas. Family and tradition. My children don’t really understand the Christian meaning of what Christmas is.
All they know is making holiday art, frosting cookies, hot cocoa, decorating, pretty lights, family and friend fun times, and present time. That’s all they and I care about.
stuckinred
@Odie Hugh Manatee: I was against it too. Did my best to stop it when I came home at the ripe old age of 19.@Odie Hugh Manatee: Oh yea, stepping across the line. As I mentioned I went in on my birthday, November 10. That also is the Marine Corps birthday and I come from a line of swabbies and jar heads as long as your arm. I almost did the corps but my old man, having ferried them in on landing after landing, pushed me toward the Army. When I went in they were going down the line of draftee’s , Army, Marines, Army, Marines. You did NOT want to be a draftee in the crotch. Trust me.
WereBear
@aimai: Thank you so much, and the best of the season to you & yours, too. Likewise, I always enjoy what you have to say. In addition:
You are a wonder of multiculturality.
@Linda Featheringill: Thank you for the best wishes for Mr WereBear. Merry Christmas to you too!
Odie Hugh Manatee
I have to add that though we don’t do anything for Xmas the wife does take care of family by baking up a ton of banana bread, cookies, fudge and presents for the young nephews and nieces then shipping it up to one of my sisters who distributes it, usually after nabbing a few extra cookies for herself. Wifey is an excellent cook and her treats are really good, almost criminally good…lol!
The day before Xmas she packs up ready-to-make breakfasts for local friends and runs around town delivering them. She also makes sure to include one of her famous knitted cotton dish cloths for each home. Last year she had to make 63 of them and every year she has to make more. Her mother did the same thing and she wants to make it a tradition. It was her way of community networking, old school style. Our daughter helps her every year, making up extras for her friends. I’m sure that she will carry on and keep it a tradition.
Even though we don’t celebrate like we used to we still let our friends and family know once a year that they are in our thoughts. To me, that is the most important aspect of Xmas. Religion can drive people apart, especially during the holidays. This crosses those lines nicely.
DearOldDad
@jayjaybear:
Damn! “The axial tilt is the Reason for the Season” is much better than my ‘ the solstice is the reason for the season’
suzanne
Arrrrrgh.
I just found out that a very good friend of mine was hit by a drunk driver earlier in the week, and is still hospitalized. (Her phone was destroyed when she was hit, so we’re all just finding out now.)
Keep your loved ones close.
R-Jud
@suzanne: Ugh, killer cars. My brother’s resting at home after a car accident on the 6th that left him with multiple skull fractures. I hope your friend makes a full recovery.
On another note, aren’t you expecting? And overdue? How are you feeling?
WereBear
@suzanne: So sorry to hear. My best wishes for a speedy recovery.
harlana
My family and I celebrate Christmas as a time for all of us to come together, but a few years ago, we dropped the gift giving because times are hard and it’s ridiculous to feel like you have to go out and buy all this stuff which, as you say, nobody needs or wants, especially when people are struggling.
shortstop
I can understand hating Christmas, but I hope you’re resisting the temptation to keep telling everyone around you how much you despise it. For the first few years of our marriage, my husband had me in tears for the last two weeks of December with his incessant, vicious complaining. It’s not like does any of the work — I take care of all the holiday-related tasks. And it’s not like I set up musical olde worlde villages, play endless Christmas music or shove dozens of unwanted cookies in people’s faces, either — I do like a Christmas tree, but I otherwise prefer to celebrate a low-key, low-expense holiday.
I finally told him to shut it because he was bumming everyone out so badly. He kindly did, and now he says he kind of likes the very laid-back Christmas season we observe. He may be lying, but at least he’s not constantly bitching.
scav
@shortstop: Still, the incessant harping that one HAS to enjoy this event (especially those insisting one observe the event a certain way) is equally annoying. A general round of letting people be who they are isn’t out of the realm of the reasonable. Not saying anything about your particular instance, just a general observation.
suzanne
@R-Jud: Yes, I am expecting, though not for much longer—most likely going to induce Tuesday or Wednesday of next week. I feel kind of craptacular… much to do, but not getting enough sleep, and my docs started getting concerned about preeclampsia earlier in the week. I am ready to be done.
Thank you for your concern… as Tom Petty so eloquently put it, the waiting is the hardest part.
I’m worried about my friend. Her husband sent us all a message saying she survived, but didn’t provide any further details. That strikes me as ominous. I’m glad to hear your brother is on the mend. A full recovery is expected, I hope?
shortstop
@scav: Totally agree — no reason not to let those around you know that Christmas is not everybody’s thing, and what are blogs for if not venting as expansively as you like? It was the in-fucking-cessive nature of my husband’s complaining that got to me — when it gets to the point where you’re actively interfering with others’ ability to enjoy a holiday they do like, it’s too much.
Funny, too, because he’s not normally a bitcher. Living through your parents’ pugilistic divorce and shared custody will take the shine off holidays. Fortunately he still loves Memorial Day, Labor Day and the Fourth of July.
blondie
@Michael:
Right back atcha.
FFrank
Not to toot my own horn. Okay I’m tooting my own horn. but Santarchy/Santacon is more of an artististic drunken way of abusing these holidays. Its all over the world.
Here is Pittsburgh’s Santarchy we had a lil bit over 200 people. We gave gifts to the kids at the Southside Carnegie Library and the Downtown PPG Ice rink where the kids loved us, Santas Big Sack Races, Doing a Tug O’ War on a moving subway, Doing a Drive by Clausing at Macy’s and getting a pic with the Macy’s Santa, Bull Riding at the Bar in Costume and visiting the Bad lil Girls n Boys at the Strip Club and the Gays Bars. Plus a lot more craziness because this lasts for 10 hours ;-) >.
Here are the clean pics link from the beginning from WPXI channel 11. Tranny Santa and Gimp Santa are a site to see.
http://www.wpxi.com/slideshow/vj/26101547/detail.html
harlana
@Michael:
yawn
Comrade Javamanphil
@Chuck: Thank you, sir. Indeed it is the best of Christmas songs and I should know, my iPod informs me I have over 900 of them. I love Christmas music but rarely hear anything I own on the airwaves (be they mall or radio.)
ChrisS
The significant other made me put up a tree.
We just came back from Puerto Rico to an 11-day (and counting) lake effect snow storm and she needed something to make her happy about winter.
I can’t say that I dislike the tree.
The rest of CHRISTmas can go away. I just like getting together with friends and family and having a good time. Like it should be.
WereBear
Grinchiness is some people’s reaction to the relentless commercialization of every single friggin’ thing that can possibly be commercialized in every single possible or inconceivable way in each and every alternate universe caught in the grip of Homo Capitalus.
I have looked into their beady little eyes and seen how they honestly believe it IS all about the mammon; that we are pulling a con game of our own when we claim to have these things called “feelings” and ’empathy” in an attempt to handicap them in that race to the finish line to see who dies with the most toys.
Though I’m a little more understanding of shortstop’s SO; a bad divorce is the lifequake that keeps on giving.
R-Jud
@suzanne: Agh, preeclampsia. Here’s hoping it passes you by, and that the baby decides to make a clean exit before they jack you up with induction hormones. They are Not Fun.
My brother should be okay. He broke the back of the frontal bone, you know, where the sinus cavity is, so there was some bleeding from the brain. However, it was very limited and it stopped on its own. There doesn’t appear to have been any permanent damage.
I’ve talked to him a few times and he sounds more or less like himself. He gets stitches out tomorrow and goes back to see the neurologist on Wednesday. Next week they should also get the police report, so they can finally find out what was up with the driver who smashed head-on into the cab they were riding in, and what happened to their cabbie, who seemed to have broken both his legs– my brother’s girlfriend and her sister helped him out of the car.
I really, really hope your friend is okay.
FormerSwingVoter
@Michael:
Wait, this is frowned upon? But little Joey loves doggies! You can tell from all the screaming!
Jules
I love Christmas….I just hate people.
My husband and son work retail and the holiday is forever ruined for them because of the horror that is the American Public at Christmas time and my kid is only 18.
We have never lived really close to family at holiday time and after awhile we realized that driving 8-12 hours to see family that made us crazy (and hauling my sons presents with us when he was young) was just more then we wanted to do. My emotional expectations were always dashed by toxic relationships.
So now we stay home, eat lots of great food Christmas Eve, some years we will make Midnight Mass at the Cathedral downtown, Next day we open presents and eat more good food then we go see a movie (True Grit this year) and then come home and watch whatever new DVDs I bought my hubby.
The orphan thing has never worked for us, all the folks we know here are attached at their hips to mama and daddy (the south) and no one has ever (in 15 years) invited us to spend Christmas day with them even though they all know we have no family around and I always invite others to stop by.
Josie
@Shell Goddamnit: I am really sorry if what I wrote upset you. I know that not all families observe various holidays in the same way. That’s why I started my comment by the words “for me.” I don’t think that I stated that anyone else should do what I do; I just described what appeals to me. In fact, from my reading, that is what most of the comments are about. You are free to ignore them and do whatever floats your boat.
Martin
Hmm, now I really suspect that mistermix is my wife’s online secret alter-ego.
I like Christmas but I feel no particular obligation toward it. It’s an excuse for me to get my kids nice stuff (given that they never get anything the rest of the year, birthday aside, it’s no biggie) but I have no expectation of what I get from others. If sending me a card or giving me a gift stresses you out, don’t do it – my gift to you will be to relieve you of that stress.
If the holidays stress you out, you’re doin it rong.
Jim, Once
@LGRooney:
Best holiday song of 2010. We’ll be singing this one around the xmas tree.
Cris
I saw this in the RSS feed and assumed it was Angry Black Lady.
rdldot
@Admiral_Komack: It’s funny though. I deliver Thanksgiving meals on Thanksgiving and when I tell my friends, neighbors and coworkers what I’m doing for the holiday, I usually get a kind of dumbfounded look that I always take for ‘I guess you think you’re better than me, don’t you?’.
JPL
@R-Jud: I hope you send John some pictures of the little one on Xmas morn for him to post.
@Jules: Twenty plus years ago, I invited the next door neighbors and her parents for xmas eve cheer. Except for the two years when they lived in another state, we’ve continued the custom. Now we have grown children with wives or SO’s. My friends mom died over the summer so she will be missed. We started the tradition because we were both new to the Atlanta area and wanted to share some goodwill. Southerners are an interesting breed. Very friendly on the surface but that’s where it stops.
nalbar
25 years ago my wife and I sat down and asked ourselves ‘why?’. So we stopped ‘celebrating’ everything.
No; christmas, new years, thanksgiving, easter, birthdays, anniversaries, valentines day, etc. NOTHING. And that includes presents and cards for them all. Certainly no lights. We don’t give and everyone knows not to give to us. The two of us consistently forget each others birthdays. ::SHRUG::
To us they are all just stupid. You act decent all year is what you should do.
We have also not had an argument in about 15 years. Of course we disagree, but actually yell at each other … using the phrase ‘you are a…..’ or ‘last year you ……’ and raising our voices? No way.
BTW, my friends think I am a lier.
nalbar
Catsy
A-FUCKING-MEN.
There are few things more obnoxious to me than the way Christmas gets rammed down the throat of everyone in this country whether they observe it or not. It’s like a perfect storm of two of my least favorite human creations in the world: religion and crass commercialism. I deeply resent the sense of obligation that most observers try to impress upon non-observers, as if we have a duty to grit our teeth and participate in this holiday just because it’s what most of the country does. People who have grown up celebrating Xmas and who buy into its rituals and frippery have no comprehension of just how alien they make people like me feel for daring to find the excesses and religious baggage of this holiday distasteful.
Thankfully, I ended up in a LTR with a non-observant Jew, so we’re free to wage the War on Xmas in pure domestic bliss. For our household, this has whittled the season down to what are really its only redeeming qualities: time off work, time with family, and lots of food.
shortstop
@DearOldDad: What did those t-shirts from a few years ago say? “Axial tilt is the reason for the season”?
Quicksand
Why the hate? I saw Santa at the mall a few days ago and he seemed like a nice enough guy.
Seriously though, I’m not a Christian. But I do have a young child, so I definitely *get* Christmas now. There’s nothing wrong, in my book, with ginning up a festive family-oriented holiday in the dead of winter, on the shortest and darkest days of the year. The pagans had that figured out. I could do without the overt hypercommercialization, but it’s easy enough to opt out of most of that.
Catsy
@Tony Alva:
And you are a perfect example of exactly the kind of person who makes the rest of us hate this holiday. To you, it’s just so inherently wonderful that you’re incapable of comprehending the multitude of reasons why someone else might find it crass, distasteful, and oppressive.
You are everything that is wrong with Christmas, and your little screed is precisely the kind of smug, sanctimonious, snotty, parochial, and blisteringly ignorant attitude that creates more people like us.
So here’s a tip: want people to be more cheerful around Christmas? Stop shoving it down our motherfucking throats and being a sanctimonious asshole to anyone who objects to your arrogant presumption.
WereBear
They, like the Japanese, fuss very much over “honor” and “face.”
I agree with Incidents in the Life of a Slave Girl. Harriet Jacobs wrote of how the entire slaveowning culture was in a constant state of what the 20th century has come to know as denial.
Deep down, the ruling class knew they were parasites living off the labor of others, the middle class knew they were at the mercy of their “betters,” the poor whites knew they were exploited, and the slaves knew everything.
Wives knew their marriage vows were a mockery as their husbands cheated with slave women. Husbands knew they were forcing themselves on others, even as they dangled kitchen jobs or promises of freedom to get their slaves to sleep with them. Children played together, knowing when they grew up there would be cruelty and mistrust.
The entire culture, with its pretensions of scholarship and gentility, was a bizarre stew of pathologies.
That’s why I have friends in the South… who do not fetishize the past.
Read it here, free. And feel grateful.
Ash Can
I’m loving all the posts here about what and how everyone celebrates at this time of year. The military stories, the Totally Dead Barbie, Mr. WereBear feeling like celebrating, the mulled wine in the rice cooker for both Channukah and Christmas Eve, and Santarchy are all twenty pounds of awesome in a five-pound sack.
There are certainly legitimate reasons to dislike the holiday season — family problems, bad memories, SADD and the like. But people who simply make up their minds that they’re going to be miserable at this time of year because they hate Christmas R DOIN IT RONG. Don’t like Christmas? Then ditch it. Celebrate something else, in a different way, on a different day. Or don’t celebrate anything at all, and just use the season as an excuse to get together with friends/relatives and consume fattening goodies. Being pulled into celebrating due to family obligations? Determine if any of those obligations can be put off by a plausible excuse (can’t find an affordable flight, boss dumped last-minute work on me, the kids are sick, I’m sick, etc.). Unavoidable family obligations (your own spouse, your own kids)? It shouldn’t be that hard to focus on their enjoyment and enjoy that.
There are numerous things I don’t like about the way Christmas is celebrated in this day and age, so I avoid them. Aimai says, “Just stay out of stores and malls and don’t watch TV and you’ll be ok,” and truer words were never spoken. Like R-Jud suggests, I shop on line. Also, I find gorgeous, unique gifts for pennies on the dollar (and I do mean pennies) at estate sales throughout the year. So I’m never put in the position of having to go to an actual store and pay full retail for something that just happens to be hanging on a rack or sitting on a counter that may or may not be worth what I’m paying for it, that the recipient may or may not like, but which has to be purchased right now because there’s a deadline. I listen only to the classical and jazz radio stations here in Chicago, so I never hear the easy-listening/pop-schmaltz crap. Bottle Rocket gets his goodies under the tree and in his stocking on Christmas morning, but other than that, there’s very little gift-giving in my immediate and extended family, and if my friends (who are parents of young children themselves) even find time to get together over the holidays, it’s only for food and/or drinks, and no gifts are involved. If I don’t manage to get holiday cards out, my friends and relatives still like me, and know that I still like them. And as far as I’m concerned, all the decorations and lights and festivity of all the different holidays at this time of year is a big old glorious thumbnose right in the face of the (literally) darkest days of the year.
Why focus on the bad aspects of the season to the detriment of the good? Life’s too damned short.
Grazni
@LGRooney: Best Carol Ever!! I’m sharing it with everyone I know.
Catsy
@Ash Can:
Short of locking yourself in your home from Thanksgiving through New Year’s and avoiding all interaction with strangers, it is fundamentally impossible to avoid it.
If you want us to stop being pissy about Christmas, talk to people like Tony Alva, not us. It’s their arrogant, oppressive need to badger non-observers about how they should get with the holiday spirit that is a big part of why we hate it so much.
suzanne
@R-Jud: Glad to hear your brother seems to be recovering well and seems to be getting back to some semblance of normal. It sounds like he’s through the worst of it.
I have to be induced b/c I’m epileptic, so I am just eager to get on with it at this point. Rolling over in bed requires a three-point turn. I’m ready to go here.
Trakker
Man, I LOVE a good ‘ol fashioned “I hate C’mas” rant! Count me in. I do like the music though but only the week before c’mas. And I enjoying watching my grandkids enjoy the season. But I HATE the traffic (drivers become maniacs), and the fact that every frickin’ store and parking lot is packed for the whole damn month of December.
I hate c’mas cards the most. My family back in Indiana is very religious so I get these totally obnoxious religious cards from them and notes inside telling me how blessed they’ve been this year [Uncle Burt had both legs amputated below the knee last June but God made sure the doctor caught the diabetes in time to prevent any real damage! We praise our loving God for watching over us!].
Brad Hanon
Tim Minchin said it for me.
WereBear
@suzanne: My best to you, and hoping the little nipper will forgive you giving them a birthday so close to Christmas.
@Trakker: Man. I know. It’s so darn weird. I was born in Northern Indiana but got out when I was six. And been grateful, ever since.
suzanne
@WereBear: Heh. Munchkin #1’s birthday is today, so I’m gonna have two little princesses all pissed off at me. Well, I always said, if they weren’t in therapy by age sixteen, I’M DOIN IT RONG. ;)
Thank you for the kind words, and I’m thinking good thoughts for Mr. WereBear. Merry Whatever. :)
WereBear
@suzanne: Thanks, backatcha, and remember, today is Beethoven’s Birthday, too!
Though he might have held some grudges…
licensed to kill time
Christmas was best when I was a kid. Lots of good stuff to eat, presents to anticipate, singing in choir dressed up in angel outfits, getting to stay up half the night to keep the luminarias lit…
Though, come to think of it, there was a lot of disappointment as well. Your parents getting you the thing you wanted but wrong color or style which totally ruined it. Getting busted searching for and finding the present stash so your little brother got the Bop the Beetle game instead of you. Expectations raised and dashed. Neighbor kids comparing “Whadja get?” and gloating when their bike was cool and yours was lame.
So, even Kid Christmas can suck, now that I think about it.
scav
@suzanne: hint to kids. My uncle and I both have Dec 30th as a birthday, and he managed to con stuff out of total strangers by looking all big-eyed and put upon. People do try to insist that “this is both your birthday and Christmas gift”, but there are upsides — you just have to work for them. Properly managed, New Years can become all about you if you so desire.
Just Some Fuckhead
As a Christian, and one of the very best if I say so myself, I must confess to hating Christmas too. There’s really nothing Christian about this time of the year except for maybe the food drives, Even so, those happen all year round but really kick in around Thanksgiving.
For God So Loved The World That He Gave His Only Begotten Son That Whosoever Buyeth Toys At Christmas Shall Not Perish But Have Everlast Gym Equipment.
Josie
@Brad Hanon: Thank you for that. It was really true,
xephyr
I have many fine Christmas memories, and have a bit of fun with the season as well, but the POV expressed by mistermix is one that also resonates as it points out the more obnoxious elements of the phenomenon. I lead a “christian” lifestyle, but in my service to honesty requires me to be an atheist. That said, I’ve always had a soft spot for Christmas – but it’s getting tested more and more each year by the subservience to consumerism combined with the generally low level of sensibility in todays culture. The Pixies clip helps. :-)
Hungry Joe
Being both Jewish and, from a young age, a devout, practicing atheist, I always hated Christmas — dominant, historically hostile culture in my face (and worse, in my ears) 24/7, and all that. Then, a few years ago, something snapped, and all of a sudden I kind of liked the way Christmas emphasized that I was different; it gives me the (admittedly cheap) frisson of martyrdom. And Hanukkah is still fun, even when I have to play Dreidel, which nobody over the age of eight can do for more than five minutes without going insane. (Hint: Eat all your chocolate coins, and you’re out.)
JPL
@WereBear: Thank you for the link and what a great site.
Happy happy holidays!
ChrisS
I explicitly tell my mom not to buy us anything. She still does. She’s a packrat, too, so I think most of what she gives us are things that she saw in a thrift store or a garage sale that just shouldn’t be thrown out. We were never much above the poverty line growing up, so I don’t have any expectations about getting shit for Christmas. And she doesn’t have much money today, but she still tries so hard to make sure we get things for Christmas. I love her.
My buddy, a deranged libertarian nutjob (but I love him like a brother, so what are am I going to do?) still, to this day, in our mid-to-late 30s wants to compare what we get for Christmas. He’s so innocent about it, though. His mom & dad, not exactly wealthy people (she’s a nurse and he works for a car dealership) still buy him outrageous presents (in the sense of middle class people buying shit for their 38 year old son who has a family of his own). Last year, they gave him a $600 table saw. But whatever.
Svensker
@Catsy:
So you’re the Griswolds’ neighbors in NL’s Family Christmas?
asiangrrlMN
mistermix, I think I love you. If you weren’t married, I would propose to you. I love winter. I love the cold and the snow. I loathe Christmas. I do not like holidays in general, and Christmas really rankles. In my later years, I’ve mellowed out a bit so I don’t talk about my loathing of Christmas so much, but it’s still there. I don’t understand the insistence that we have to like it and that there is something wrong with people who don’t like it. Why? No one says that about, say, July 4th or Halloween or even Thanksgiving. You like it. I don’t. What the fuck is the problem with that?
@Michael: Funny enough,
I was just thinking the same thing about you.
Shell Goddamnit
@Josie:
Oh dear, those scattershot comments – I did not have yours in mind when I got all irritated. Sorry for being all cryptic & shit.
I never did feel any drive to make Christmas anything in particular for either myself or my family, so yr excellent advice was taken about 30 yrs ago. I do feel for folks whose families and traditions leave them vulnerable to other people’s expectations, but I’m not particularly vulnerable myself.
Yet one more thing for which I owe my parents oodles of gratitude…
Ruckus
Merry Fucking christmas.
OK now that my true feelings are exposed I will say that when I was in a relationship that included a 3 year old girl, christmas was an absolute joy. We didn’t buy a lot of presents or expensive presents but seeing the look on that face when she opened them was worth ten million times more. There is a reason we give gifts to the people we like, it makes them happy.
So now that that little girl is out of the picture once again I go back to my old self. Merry fucking christmas.
Marybdvm
@Phyllis: Please don’t beat any mules (except maybe the 2 legged kind who voted for the tax bill-and they’re not mules anyway-thye’re as&^s.)
Ruckus
@Shell Goddamnit:
Seconded
Sometimes I look back and see not that the family celebrations were all that bad but the mental warfare in between them made wanting to celebrate belonging to that family non existent.
Ruckus
@stuckinred:
In 69 they were army, army, marines, army, army, marines. I had worked in HS for an ex marine drill instructor, great guy but I could tell from him that I didn’t want or need to be a grunt on point in every crazy patrol that could be dreamed up.
Cain
@Jean:
My parents still has the ornament I made out of a styrofoam cup I made when I was the 3rd or 4th grade. good times. I loved christmas then. Christmas was a lot more special when you were a kid.
When never really got a lot of gifts or toys as kids so it was always great when we got something. Of course, I would be kind of disappointed if I got clothes or something since they seem so pedestrian (mommy always buys us clothes!)
I enjoy christmas although we don’t really have anybody to visit or see or anything like that, we’re kind of isolated. So it’s really just about going to a show or something..s peakin of which I better get on that.
cain
Darkrose
I love Christmas. It’s my secret shame, because as a postmodern, social-justice oriented GenXer, I’m supposed to be all cynical and shit. But the truth is that I turn into a 10-year-old on December 1, in large part because my Christmas memories are focused on my father, and I feel wistful about them, rather than outright depressed.
We had a ton of holiday traditions: the Advent calendar, going to church and watching the purple and pink candles lit, going out and getting the tree, the specific order of decorating it, hanging the stockings, the Brewing of the Nog, my mother’s baking frenzy, and finally, Midnight Mass, with my dad singing “The Ballad of the Brown King” with the church choir, and going home to open presents because it was 1 am and therefore technically Christmas.
This year, we’re not traveling, and we have a little money to spend, so we’ve been able to have a little fun. We have the lights and the shiny and presents and cocktail Christmas music on Pandora. The cats haven’t eaten the trees yet, we have dinner reservations for Christmas Day, and I’ve got two days off work. It’s all good.
Cain
@aimai:
You must tell me how this is done! The google did not help!
cain
shortstop
@Catsy:
Of course it is. It’s by far the largest cultural holiday in this country, not even counting the religious (not nearly as large but still pretty damn big to many Americans) part of it. No one living here can avoid it; all you can control is your reaction to it.
I thought it was pretty obvious that when Ash Can said “Don’t like it? Ditch it,” he/she meant ditch celebrating it, not that you could or should be able to avoid all references to it by others. You noted in another post that you and your SO have found a way to do the things you like this season and avoid the ones you don’t. Great; that’s pretty much the extent of what you can do.
Cain
@WereBear:
It’s happening in India as well. Every cherished Indian holiday or religious observance is turned into some kind of tourist trap. Lame. I’m not as big of a fan of Christmas as I used to be, but I do like the lights and stuff. My wife loves doing the tree and just having that festive air. I think there is something to say bout that.
I think if you turned off the tv, that would go a long way on cutting down on the commercialism and also agree not to get any presents that you couldn’t make on your own.
Yesterday, I learned how to make a iphone holder using the calendar we put in our lanyards. Works pretty effectively.
cain