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You are here: Home / Politics / Religion / Kriss Kross Is Not Having Anything Today

Kriss Kross Is Not Having Anything Today

by John Cole|  December 24, 20104:00 pm| 64 Comments

This post is in: Religion, Assholes, I Reject Your Reality and Substitute My Own

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They just can’t help themselves:

Never mind dreaming of a White Christmas. This Christmas, tourists and pilgrims to the Holy Land will need to keep their piety under wraps. AsiaNews reports that in Bethlehem, the city of Jesus’ birth, the Cross has been banned for fear of stirring up unrest among followers of Islam (aka, the religion of peace). Writes AsiaNews:

Below are multiple photos of crosses on display and for sale in Bethlehem, taken TODAY in Bethelem by aspiring photographer Nasser Nasser:

These clowns pushing this nonsense about the War on Christmas really are looking for a religious war, aren’t they?

I’d also be remiss if I didn’t note that some of the craftsmanship in those photos is remarkable.

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Reader Interactions

64Comments

  1. 1.

    PS

    December 24, 2010 at 4:03 pm

    I demand to see the vault copy of the negatives of those photographs!

  2. 2.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    December 24, 2010 at 4:06 pm

    The real meaning of Christmas has been lost in all the Christianity nonsense. Joseph and Mary went to Bethlehem to pay their fucking taxes.

    God bless Big Government.

  3. 3.

    The Grand Panjandrum

    December 24, 2010 at 4:07 pm

    So Christmas was totally krossed out? Damn shame.

  4. 4.

    General Stuck

    December 24, 2010 at 4:08 pm

    My fav this year from the bible thumpers is the Creationist Theme Park in my original home state of Kentucky. I mean, a long neck Brontosaurus catching a view from Noa’s Ark bleacher seats is so fucking cool.

    If they put Eve sunbathing on the top deck in a fig leaf, I might just pony up some cash for a look see.

  5. 5.

    jeffreyw

    December 24, 2010 at 4:10 pm

    You wanna see a war on xmas? Gotcher first volley right here. Mrs J hauls the tree to the dump–on xmas eve!

  6. 6.

    SiubhanDuinne

    December 24, 2010 at 4:11 pm

    I visited Bethlehem over 30 years ago, and although I was not and am not particularly religious in any tradition, I was blown away by the carved olive wood crosses, creches, camels and Magi figures, stars, and other iconic Christmas images. I bought a slew of them, which I gave to friends and relatives as Christmas gifts that year. Beautiful work.

  7. 7.

    Torteya

    December 24, 2010 at 4:11 pm

    I know better than to believe my lying eyes.

  8. 8.

    Sirkowski

    December 24, 2010 at 4:16 pm

    I tried to post on that blog to link to these photos, but I’m identified as spam. Suspicious.

  9. 9.

    Anoniminous

    December 24, 2010 at 4:17 pm

    Isn’t the Christmas Season the time to spread hatred and bigotry?

  10. 10.

    fucen tarmal

    December 24, 2010 at 4:17 pm

    @Just Some Fuckhead:

    i don’t know about you, but joseph had to feel like the biggest asshole in history walking his ass across the desert, looking up at the “preggo virgin” on the one camel he could afford with his hard earned. i mean, i suppose his buddies back home had to believe he was hitting that, and his earnest refusal to say so may have made him gallant in some quarters. i’m sure whatever passed for woo-girls back in the village might have given him some on the side, for the effort…
    but that was a long ass way to be walking for a pregnant chick you aren’t banging.

    seriously, when the wise men showed up, i’m sure it had nothing to do with jesus, they just wanted to see what kind of douche would walk all that way for a chick who wasn’t even putting out, for him, but was surely getting it somewhere.

  11. 11.

    Ruckus

    December 24, 2010 at 4:23 pm

    @fucen tarmal:
    Chuckle, chuckle

  12. 12.

    j

    December 24, 2010 at 4:24 pm

    I tried to leave a comment on that site but kept getting the message:

    Error!
    Your submission has triggered the spam filter and will not be accepted.

    Here is the cleaned up version. (By that I mean I changed the line “Why must republicans and libertarians LIE all the time?” ).

    Dear Portnoy, I have a complaint…
    Why can’t republicans and libertarians ever tell the truth? It doesn’t seem all that “Christian” to me.
    Go to “Balloon Juice dot com”, and see pictures of a boat load of crosses TAKEN TODAY!
    I’m anxiously awaiting the retraction.
    I doubt I’ll see one, though, because that’s how you liars roll.

    Not all that :Libertarian” if they block the truth. I guess they just want an “Amen” chorus.

  13. 13.

    Alan

    December 24, 2010 at 4:25 pm

    You can’t peddle the end times without Christians being persecuted for being Christian. It’s an important component to any real doomsday scenario.

  14. 14.

    Legalize

    December 24, 2010 at 4:29 pm

    Yes, but I went to the GAP today and the cashier told me to have a “Happy Holiday.” So, gabba gabba purple monkey telephone, cut taxes, producers, second amendment, down our throats, refrigerator box.

  15. 15.

    cmorenc

    December 24, 2010 at 4:31 pm

    I actually DID sight a bona fide battlefield where war was actually being conducted against Christmas! On North Blvd (US-1) in north Raleigh, NC, near where Lousiburg Rd (Hwy 401) splits off from it, I saw what at first looked like a colorful billboard simply saying in nicely calligraphic letters what I first quickly read as saying: “SEASON’S GREETINGS”. However, something didn’t seem quite right, and on second glance, I realized the sign instead said: “REASON’S GREETINGS”, and in smaller print underneath it noted that the billboard was sponsored by the “Freedom From Religion” society or something like that. I’m surprised someone hasn’t alerted a Fox News camera crew to do a story about that and pass it along to O’Reilly, Hannity et. al.

    OTOH, it wouldn’t surprise me if the actual sponsors of the sign turn out to be some wingnut organization Fox put up to the project, to create a convenient story supporting their “War Against Christmas” meme, and right in the heart of the Bible Belt too!

  16. 16.

    shortstop

    December 24, 2010 at 4:33 pm

    @fucen tarmal: I’m crying over here.

  17. 17.

    dr. bloor

    December 24, 2010 at 4:33 pm

    So from photo three we can infer that Santas in red bathrobes and cheesy-ass false beards are a world-wide phenomenon?

  18. 18.

    Brick Oven Bill

    December 24, 2010 at 4:34 pm

    Mohammad teaches us in Ishaq 4:96;

    “War is Deception.”

    Kind of sounds like Jesus, just more deceitful and war-like. But we digress. I think I recognize those Nassar-Nassar pictures. They are actually of a Chicago flea market.

  19. 19.

    cathyx

    December 24, 2010 at 4:34 pm

    Exactly when are the end times predicted by Christians to occur?

  20. 20.

    The Republic of Stupidity

    December 24, 2010 at 4:35 pm

    I’d also be remiss if I didn’t note that some of the craftsmanship in those photos is remarkable.

    And I’d be remiss if I didn’t point out that some of the merch for sale in those pictures looks suspiciously like the kind of cheap, tacky, Chinese-made shit Walmart peddles every War-On-Xmas season…

    Ho… ho… ho…

  21. 21.

    Calouste

    December 24, 2010 at 4:37 pm

    What do crosses have to do with Christmas anyway? They’re for Easter.

  22. 22.

    D-Chance.

    December 24, 2010 at 4:37 pm

    A bit dated, but Michael Lewis on the Greek financial mess.

  23. 23.

    Calouste

    December 24, 2010 at 4:39 pm

    @cathyx:

    May 21st 2011 is the latest prediction.

  24. 24.

    Bruce (formerly Steve S.)

    December 24, 2010 at 4:39 pm

    Thank God I can still worship Jesus by purchasing a cross in a Bethlehem gift shop.

  25. 25.

    de stijl

    December 24, 2010 at 4:40 pm

    So Bethlehem is totally krossed out and yet Christmas warriors are still wiggidy-wiggidy-whack.

    The mac daddy will make you jump. Jump.
    The daddy mac will make you jump. Jump.

  26. 26.

    El Cid

    December 24, 2010 at 4:45 pm

    Just because something isn’t true doesn’t mean it’s not true.

  27. 27.

    licensed to kill time

    December 24, 2010 at 4:47 pm

    Maybe they should check out The Jesus Trail to see how well that War on Christmas is going in the Holy Land.

    As far as I can tell, the only ‘war’ is between those who would like to take a larger share of those Christian tourist bucks.

  28. 28.

    Mark S.

    December 24, 2010 at 4:48 pm

    @Just Some Fuckhead:

    I’ve always thought that was one of the dumbest parts of the Bible. Why the hell would the Romans care about your ancestral home if you no longer live there and aren’t going to be paying taxes there? It would really suck if you, say, moved to Rome or somewhere. I know, Luke had to get them to Bethlehem and came up with the stupidest possible pretext.

  29. 29.

    Jay C

    December 24, 2010 at 4:50 pm

    I especially liked the way this Howard Portnoy clown (or someone at his cheesebox site) illustrated this poorly-sourced claptrap with a photo captioned “Christian clergymen in Bethlehem: A vanishing sight ” . A picture of a long line of — wait for it – Christian clergymen! Looking far from “vanished”.

    One has to wonder: are these people born clueless, or do they have to work at it…..?

  30. 30.

    AAA Bonds

    December 24, 2010 at 4:56 pm

    Since I pointed out yesterday that there has been a real war on Christmas waged by a real Taliban, I suppose I don’t have to point out that this is what an “American Taliban” would actually do if we had one: use blatant and public force to quash opponents’ religious expression, whether police force, terrorist force, or whatever.

    The main problem with the phrase “American Taliban” is that it makes us look like spoiled little brats to the rest of the world, especially the folks dodging cops, bullets, and bombs to practice their religion.

  31. 31.

    burnspbesq

    December 24, 2010 at 4:59 pm

    @cmorenc:

    I expect you’ll see some of the locals who get new guns from Santa doing some test firing at that sign later tonight. Don’t go out there without body armor.

  32. 32.

    Shadow's Mom

    December 24, 2010 at 4:59 pm

    @Just Some Fuckhead: And to take part in a census!

    Hmmm, anyone have posting privileges at the right-wing fright shows? These might be interesting points to throw into the mix.

  33. 33.

    AAA Bonds

    December 24, 2010 at 5:00 pm

    And it’s very important to point out that increased repression of Christians throughout the Muslim world is a net result of our invasions of Iraq and Afghanistan.

    Here’s an interesting Christmas story: Haaretz reports that there’s a plan to concentrate all of Iraq’s Christians in Nineveh, ostensibly for protection, but, of course, there’s not enough money to do this anyway.

  34. 34.

    Get Yr Gramma Right

    December 24, 2010 at 5:00 pm

    Portnoy says: “[I]t is not inconceivable that the Holy Land will eventually have zero Christians living within its borders.”

    You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

  35. 35.

    MattF

    December 24, 2010 at 5:01 pm

    You’re missing the fundamental distinctions between true, ‘true’, and “‘true'”.

  36. 36.

    Woodrowfan

    December 24, 2010 at 5:02 pm

    someone should remind these bozos that the Christians living there are ARAB Christians. Then step back as the teatards’ heads explode.

  37. 37.

    Shadow's Mom

    December 24, 2010 at 5:04 pm

    @Mark S.: @Just Some Fuckhead: And to take part in a census!

    @Mark S.: See above. I think the return to birthplace was due to census rather than to pay the taxes. I’ve checked my bible though to confirm.

    Luke 2:1-7
    In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. 2 (This was the first census that took place while Quirinius was governor of Syria.) 3 And everyone went to his own town to register.

    4 So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. 5

    Hmmm, anyone have posting privileges at the right-wing fright shows? These might be interesting points to throw into the mix.

  38. 38.

    Svensker

    December 24, 2010 at 5:11 pm

    @Woodrowfan:

    someone should remind these bozos that the Christians living there are ARAB Christians

    That’s why they don’t like them and don’t give a shit that our meddling in the ME has driven out huge numbers of Christians. But they’re Ay-rabs, hence deserving of scorn and suspicion.

  39. 39.

    Cassidy

    December 24, 2010 at 5:15 pm

    @cathyx: Not soon enough. Half of them just up and leave? That’s my kind of party.

  40. 40.

    fucen tarmal

    December 24, 2010 at 5:24 pm

    @shortstop:

    that isn’t even the worst part…

    as the story goes, mary and joseph did eventually have sex. of course, how was joseph supposed to feel when he was getting some, and even doing everything right, what is mary screaming?

    “oh god, oh god, oh god yes!”

    i mean that has to fuck with a guy’s confidence.

  41. 41.

    Gina

    December 24, 2010 at 5:25 pm

    Such histrionics are why this has been the earworm soundtrack of my day: Merry Fucking Christmas! NSFW, obvs.

  42. 42.

    Gina

    December 24, 2010 at 5:29 pm

    Also too, I watched Al Jazeera English’s news report online, they talked about the city of Bethlehem, in PALESTINE. Cue the shrieks of outrage far and wide.

  43. 43.

    El Cid

    December 24, 2010 at 5:35 pm

    By the way, since the shepherds were out tending their flocks, then Mary had her kid in the spring or summer, because sheep don’t graze too much grass in the winter.

  44. 44.

    funluvn

    December 24, 2010 at 5:38 pm

    Hello, Teanoy? Reality here. Jesus was arab. He died on a cross. Likely he has no love for the whole cross worship and finds it quite heathen and truly warped.

    I know that’s a lot to swallow all at once, but try to work with it

  45. 45.

    Mark S.

    December 24, 2010 at 5:46 pm

    Another fun fact is that Matthew and Luke genealogies of Jesus agree on David and Joseph–and no one in between.

  46. 46.

    Dr. Squid

    December 24, 2010 at 5:50 pm

    @dr. bloor: Thanks to our ad men in the good ol’ USA, it basically is worldwide.

    But as for that cross over Bathrobe Santa’s shoulder, I think that’s what was referred to as fine craftsmanship. I’m guessing the ribs and the loincloth wrinkles were handcarved.

  47. 47.

    Mark S.

    December 24, 2010 at 5:59 pm

    @Shadow’s Mom:

    I think the purpose of the census was for taxation. I don’t think they were apportioning House districts.

  48. 48.

    Cermet

    December 24, 2010 at 6:03 pm

    @fucen tarmal: Who ever said she wasn’t putting out then? Christ had a few brothers and that sure didn’t happen any other way.

    As for the asswipe saying cross’s are banned when did facts ever get in the way of their lies … I’m sure he read it somewere on the internet so it must be true.

  49. 49.

    alwhite

    December 24, 2010 at 6:15 pm

    Link goes to the interview with the Inn Keeper – a great holiday read
    http://whatever.scalzi.com/2010/12/21/an-interview-with-the-nativity-innkeeper/

  50. 50.

    alwhite

    December 24, 2010 at 6:19 pm

    @El Cid:

    You probably wouldn’t be surprised at how upset some people can get when you point that little fact out to them. He was not born in December no way no how.

    The solstice is the reason for the season, the bright PR guys in the early church just tacked their brand on it.

  51. 51.

    Southern Beale

    December 24, 2010 at 6:28 pm

    @Just Some Fuckhead:

    The real meaning of Christmas has been lost in all the Christianity nonsense. Joseph and Mary went to Bethlehem to pay their fucking taxes.

    LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

  52. 52.

    PS

    December 24, 2010 at 6:40 pm

    @dr. bloor: Yes. About 15 years ago I went to spend late December in Marrakesh, on the grounds that Morocco is Muslim and the season might therefore be bearable. Among the first things I saw were inflatable plastic Santas, the hot toy of the era; they were everywhere. But the vacation got better from there.

  53. 53.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    December 24, 2010 at 6:51 pm

    @Mark S.:

    I’ve always thought that was one of the dumbest parts of the Bible. Why the hell would the Romans care about your ancestral home if you no longer live there and aren’t going to be paying taxes there? It would really suck if you, say, moved to Rome or somewhere. I know, Luke had to get them to Bethlehem and came up with the stupidest possible pretext.

    And, lo, it came to pass that Mary longed for Bethlehem’s jewelry, specifically a cross made by the finest craftsmen. Joseph became secretly aware of her desire and upon taking off work early in the midweek, he came to where she was and suddenly announced, “Day Trip!”

  54. 54.

    me

    December 24, 2010 at 7:14 pm

    @D-Chance.:

    “The first thing a government does in an election year is to pull the tax collectors off the streets.”

    I wonder if President Palin will try this.

  55. 55.

    Leelee for Obama

    December 24, 2010 at 7:28 pm

    Merry Festivus to all my fellow Juicers!

    I haven’t been awake enough to post or read much since I went back to work, but I have been with y’all in spirit!

    In reference to the WAR, I am in retail these days and have been saying Merry Christmas to all and sundry for the past two weeks. The persecuted ones are usually struck dumb, and say same to you and walk away confused! I have to assume that if you give what they demand you should and must-they are at a loss to know what to do next! Festivus, indeed, for me!

    OTOH, I made Christmas cards for my GrandBabies the have the cutest little nativity scene (little kids done up as the Fam) and inside I wrote, “Remember the Birthday Boy!” They like it very much, and I think that’s cool!

    Love to all,

    Leelee

  56. 56.

    Snarla

    December 24, 2010 at 7:30 pm

    I wanted to believe that AsiaNews was a real news site, but the Christian imagery leaping off the page in dozens of places makes me skeptical. Plus the quote up top from Pope John Paul II.
    Their hatred of Muslims is obvious from the home page, but you’d probably have to look deeper to find out how they feel about Jews.

  57. 57.

    paltoday

    December 24, 2010 at 8:07 pm

    The real “War on Christmas” is the one being waged against Palestinian Christians. You can see if in Israel itself, in Nazareth for example:

    Nazareth suburb’s mayor: Christmas trees ‘provocative’

    “NAZARETH ILLIT, Israel (AFP) — The mayor of a Jewish suburb of Nazareth sparked outrage on Wednesday after refusing to allow Christmas trees to be placed in town squares, calling them provocative.
    …
    “The request of the Arabs to put Christmas trees in the squares in the Arab quarter of Nazareth Illit is provocative,” Mayor Shimon Gapso told AFP.”

    And you can see it in Bethlehem:

    In Bethlehem, shepherds watching their flocks by night are a dying breed

    Wall Rapidly Closing Bethlehem Village

    “The Israeli Defense Ministry has quickened the pace of construction of the Separation Wall dividing the Palestinian village of Al-Wajala [in the Bethlehem area], despite the Israeli High Court’s demand earlier this week that the State provide an explanation for its confiscation of land belonging to the village.”

    I don’t expect Bill O’Rielly will be devoting much time to Palestinian Christians, but despite the repressive, decades long occupation, they still find a way to hold on to their culture. Palestinian Christians still find ways to celebrate.

  58. 58.

    New Yorker

    December 24, 2010 at 8:18 pm

    I’d also be remiss if I didn’t note that some of the craftsmanship in those photos is remarkable.

    Yes, this atheist would be tempted to purchase some of those wood-carved nativity scenes. They’re beautiful.

  59. 59.

    paltoday

    December 24, 2010 at 9:05 pm

    Here are some more articles and resources about the effect of the Israeli occupation on Bethlehem:

    1. Bethlehem is increasingly encircled by the Israeli separation wall (ruled illegal by the International Court of Justice in 2005). Kids recently painted a Christmas greeting on it, see the photo: “Merry Christmas World, From Bethlehem Ghetto”

    2. Bethlehem is also increasingly encircled by illegal Israeli settlements, such as Efrat, Gilo, and so on. Efrat has continued to expand, as recently as October of this year. Under international law, all settlements in the Occupied Palestinian Territories are illegal. See a map of the settlements.

    3. Settlers near Bethlehem routinely terrorize the local population. Recently, they set fire to their crops, and burned a mosque.

    For more, see this article by Kenneth Woodward in the WSJ, this letter by Bethlehem area resident Mazin Qumsiyeh, this report by the UN, and this excellent article by Lamis Andoni in Al Jazeera.

  60. 60.

    Anne Laurie

    December 24, 2010 at 9:12 pm

    @dr. bloor: __

    So from photo three we can infer that Santas in red bathrobes and cheesy-ass false beards are a world-wide phenomenonz?

    Myself, I like the many anime/manga stories based on the Japanese interpretation of American Christmas, which is that couples must spend December 25 together, or else — they take all our New Years Eve/Valentine Day angst and mash it together, add in the worst of the consumerist/commercial aspects, and top off with KFC. Not kidding — the Colonel’s recipe has become the “traditional” Japanese Christmas feast.

  61. 61.

    Snarla

    December 25, 2010 at 11:39 am

    12/25/2010, Associated Press: BETHLEHEM, West Bank (AP) — A record number of pilgrims are gathered in Bethlehem for the largest Christmas celebration the West Bank town has seen in a decade. The Israeli military puts the number of pilgrims this year at over 100,000, compared to about 50,000 last year.

  62. 62.

    Jesus

    December 25, 2010 at 4:37 pm

    @cathyx:

    “Exactly when are the end times predicted by Christians to occur?”

    Don’t ask Me! The Father hasn’t seen fit to tell Me, as I’ve already said. Go ask some dumb-ass who doesn’t even know how to read Scriptures the way that smart guy Philo does in Alexandria. But what do you expect — Philo’s a Jew.

    Sheesh, if I didn’t have direct orders in the matter, I’d wonder if it was really a good idea, this spreading the word to the goyim.

  63. 63.

    Nobody sacred

    December 25, 2010 at 4:40 pm

    Just wanted to note that the Son of God is not allowed to post here without going through moderation. That should make us all feel safer.

  64. 64.

    moe99

    December 25, 2010 at 4:56 pm

    Highly recommend From the Holy Mountain by Dalrymple. He retraces a journey made by two monks in the 6th century from Mount Athos through the Middle East, ending up in Alexandria. His stay in Jerusalem was marked by discovery that it was the Israelis that were clamping down on Christianity. Of course, what did he know? He was only there…..

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