Unfortunately, I do not think the Gods love me enough for this:
Fresh off winning reelection and proving she can raise massive amounts of campaign cash, Rep. Michele Bachmann is beginning to consider a presidential run, according to close congressional aides.
As part of that effort, the Minnesota Republican will travel to the early caucus state of Iowa on Jan. 21 to confer with state GOP leaders and address a group of conservative tax activists.
It’s probably just a stunt to raise money, but I still like thinking about a Palin/Bachmann head to head matchup in a debate. It would be like the World Series of Stupid.
estamm
“World Series of Stupid. Heh. +1
WarMunchkin
I don’t even understand why she’s successful in the GOP. Does she have any talent that would appeal to them besides making liberals facepalm? Is that all that it takes to win now?
Mark-NC
Rep. Michele Bachmann apparently thinks that everybody will worship her like they do at her Republican rallies and at the Fox propaganda channel.
Won’t happen.
Maxwel
Be still my heart!
gene108
What’s stupid is people, who think Obama’s good for anything other than reading words other people write for him off a teleprompter…or whatever come back wingnuts have…
beltane
No and yes. Next question please.
John S.
Yes. Like Palin, she makes Rich Lowry shoot “starbursts” all over his living room.
c u n d gulag
Bachmann Turning on the Overdrive! *
*Yes, I’m old.
Bill E Pilgrim
I’ll do the thinnin around here, and don’t you forgit it!
The Grand Panjandrum
It would be like a segment of Letterman’s Stupid Pet Tricks without the cute little critters.
Snarki, child of Loki
Well, she’s got those “crazy eyes”, but she has to figure out how to get in a few winks’n’sparkles if she wants to get ahead with a run for the WH.
No, no debate between Palin and Bachmann. Oil wrestling. In BP oil.
Then, near the end, someone tosses in a lit cigar…
gene108
@WarMunchkin:
Partly.
There’s been a long standing principal among conservatives that if it makes liberals mad, it can’t be all bad and most likely must be pretty good.
They don’t need to know anything about it, just the fact liberals get mad and don’t like it makes it acceptable.
J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford
I think the whole Republican field is going to be great for laughs. You’ll have Huckabee and Palin trying to out-Christian each other at the same time they’re telling everyone that Mitt, the Magic Underpants Wearing Mormon isn’t a real Christian. Romney will have to attack Huckabee and Palin hard on their know-nothingness while trying to prevent people from noticing the underwhelming Pawlenty, Thune and Pence. Throw in Bachmann, who’s borderline retarded, and Gingrich – it’s going to be a shit storm.
And, if Limbaugh, Beck and Hannity have different favorites I wouldn’t go near the Republican field without waders on because that shit is going to be deep.
MattF
I’m for Palin/Gingrich, myself. Newt’s “Yes, I really am crazy” 1000-yard stare is absolutely the best-of-breed.
Bill E Pilgrim
That would just be gravy.
Uloborus
@gene108:
Hell, they’re really passionate about it. It’s a big thing. We’re supposedly terrified of Palin. The wingnut arm running the GOP right now is a serious bully culture. I swear they can’t view power dynamics in any other way.
Comrade Javamanphil
Palin will quit in the middle of game three.
Joey Maloney
Apparently I will not be able to listen to any NPR news program for the next two years, because it will inevitably include a soundbite from Weepy McPumpkinhead or someone even worse. I already have hypertension.
I mean, everything that comes out of their mouths is either such transparent lies, stupidity, or complete nonsense that it would be laughable. It WOULD be, if these people didn’t happen to be in charge of a whole country. With nukes.
harlana
@WarMunchkin: She’s got a purdy mowth.
Alwhite
I have had the ‘pleasure’ of watching Ms. Bachmann’s act up close for years
As a State Rep she claimed she was assaulted by lesbians in a bathroom – problem was there were other people there & just outside the door that said no such thing took place. She literally hid in the bushes around the capital building to spy on a gay rights demonstration – it just goes on & on with this dingbat.
But she is the scariest kind of dingbat, a true believer. She actually thinks that Gawd Almighty is directing her campaigns and assures her victories. I tend to blame the morans in Minnesota’s moran belt. But true believers are the most evil because they do their worst in the full knowledge that it is was their god wants.
gnomedad
The teagasms would be spectacular.
debbie
Just how stupid are politicians anymore? She’s every bit as delusional as Governor-elect John Kasich not seeing a problem with a private, closed-to-the-press swearing in ceremony in his home.
Is there no one around these people who think to point out when something might not seem like a good idea?
New Yorker
Good. The more lunatics run, the more likely it is that the lunatic vote gets split, and we get a relatively sane candidate like Romney for Obama to stomp on.
Olivia
It is scary to think of Bachmann and Palin on the same ticket. The right wing fools who hate anything liberal and who are crawling in their skin because there is a BROWN man in the WHITE House would support them even though it is clear that they are both mentally ill.
These two women are so corrupt and have many incredibly corrupt wealthy supporters as well as their crazed worshipers. It isn’t too difficult to imagine a presidency being bought by this cabal. The Bush elections proved that it can be done.
Two scenarios emerge:
1. Grifty McQuitter would last a year or two after finding out that it is frowned upon to charge for appearances, speeches and signing legislation, leaving Batshit Crazy in charge with her gay husband to exorcise all the sin out of America.
2:One or the other would die of a mysterious disease, household accident or plane crash caused by water in the fuel. You can’t have two crazy people working that closely together. One will kill the other.
Villago Delenda Est
Unfortunately for those of you looking for maximum entertainment value in the GOP primaries, Newt won’t run. To do so would derail his gravy train, and he’s not about to do that.
It’s far more lucrative for him to keep saying “send me enough money to make a run for it” and then never reaching the “enough money” stage. His fan base isn’t clever enough to figure this out.
Violet
@WarMunchkin:
She gives Glenn Beck a massive boner. He could barely control his drooling and heavy breathing on his radio show yesterday when he brought up the possibility of Bachmann running for President. Both he and the other guy who is there with him on the show were salivating over this possibility. Beck thinks she’s the best possible nominee.
Crazies of a feather flock together I guess.
Rommie
Too bad it couldn’t be a Thunderdome of Stupid.
Digital Amish
Palin/Bachmann ’12
It’s A No-brainer
I would so put that bumper sticker on my rig!
Violet
@J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford:
Can’t speak for Limbaugh or Hannity, but Beck was drooling over Bachmann’s potential run yesterday. He did mention Chris Christie as another great potential candidate, but those were his only two choices. I was listening to see if he mentioned Sarah Palin, but I think she’s fallen down his favorites list.
Beck is a True Believer type of crazy and as such probably would go with a Bachmann. Palin is not a True Believer type of crazy; she’s a Grifter and a Power Tripper. As such, she’s probably going to be more of a favorite of Limbaugh.
rikyrah
the thing is, not only are they idiots, but it would also be hilarious watching the GOP pretend that they’re not.
ps- I personally think she’s trying to stay relevant, because, if there is any justice, her ass is about to be redistricted out of existence.
terraformer
@Alwhite:
And that moran belt, about 15 miles north of where I’m currently sitting, is (as usual) carefully gerrymandered to – perhaps interestingly – resemble a belt in shape, long and thin comprising rural mouth-breathers, and neatly wrapping and encircling the suburban area that largely voted against her. Clark did make a good run in November, but the crazies cozy up to the ignorant and won out due to equal parts fear and love for those crazy, crazy eyes o’ rapture.
chris y
but I still like thinking about a Palin/Bachmann head to head matchup in a debate.
Nah, it’d be really slow. They’d keep having to stop while they exchanged the brain cell.
Joey Maloney
@Digital Amish: Please pick up the white courtesy phone to claim your internets.
Pococurante
Palin, Bachmann, Romney, Hucklebee…
Man I can’t wait! I better start laying in popcorn now.
Kirk Spencer
@Digital Amish: I assume they’d include an anti-zombie plank in their platform.
Austin Loomis
@Uloborus skrev:
…what does it say about my brainmeats that I keep wanting to read “wingnut arm” as “wingnut armpit”?
Austin Loomis
@Joey Maloney: does he have to share it with chris y, or do they each get one?
WarMunchkin
@Violet: Is that like, a figurative boner? Or are you saying that conservatives like Bachmann because they think she’s hot?
I really don’t get it. They won’t go for a governor with presumable experience, or someone with any significant bit of legislation under their belts? Bachmann has what, a bill to keep the dollar as the currency of the United States?
She and Palin both seem like media inflated blow-up dolls that exist only because us liberals find them so completely absurd.
Bubblegum Tate
Bachmann would bring to the table much of what Sarah Palin has (attractive, articulate, sheer guts) without having Palin’s liabilities, according to the B4V crew, but sadly, they see her as “likely an excellent VP candidate for anyone other than Sarah Palin (just too much alike to be an effective team),” So no Palin/Bachmann for them.
Tsulagi
Bachmann has read the tea leaves, her time is now. It’s also been foretold somewhere in the Constitution too. Or the Bible. Same thing.
Would love to see a Word Salad Palin and Crazy Eyes Bachmann debate. An Onion post on it likely would simply be a transcript.
Scooter Magruder
Throw in Mike Pence and your World Series of Stupid becomes the Trifecta of Fucking Dumb as a Rock
maya
Palin and Bachmann could revolutionize the Presidential electoral process by running not as President/Vice President, but as President/ 1st Runner-up. It would allow for a smoother transition if the President end of the ticket can not perform her duties for any reason, or, nude photos emerge.
Jay in Oregon
@Joey Maloney:
I dunno, Comrade Javamanphil @16 is a strong contender in this race…
Jay in Oregon
I hereby submit that, in preparation for that debate, we reserve “Bachmann Palin Overload” as a future BJ tag.
Jay in Oregon
@maya:
And maya comes from behind to turn this into a 3-way race for the trophy!
JCT
@WarMunchkin:
Boy, I have a bad feeling these dolls actually exist and am afraid to even confirm my hunch via Google. Ack.
Jay in Oregon
@JCT:
Yes on Sarah Palin, no on Michelle Bachmann (for now).
feebog
I, for one, hopes she takes the plunge. But wait, there are more crazies out there to fill out the field; Tom Tancredo anyone? I really hope about 10 or 12 get into the race. The debate would be akin to locking them all up in a rubber room with foam fingers and letting them bash each other to death. Good times.
lllphd
ooooh! CAT FIGHT! CAT FIGHT!!
asiangrrlMN
No. NO. NO! I would have to poke my eyes and ears out with my rusty pitchfork if she were to run because she drives me batshitcrazy. Oh, sure, it’s all fun and games for you outside of MN, but for those inside it (well, me, at any rate), listening to that woman talk is pure agony.
Ruckus
I was thinking more like the olympics of stupid. Every 4 years we get to see who the conservatards think can destroy the country faster.
debbie
Ah, maya! Your description brought back the memory of Tina Fey parading back and forth, waving, behind the lectern. Thanks for the laugh!
Dean Booth
The Giants with the pedant! The Giants win the pedant!