I couldn’t find anything on the tube last night, so I took my dad’s advice and started streaming Damages on Netflix, and I gotta tell you, I don’t think I have been that sucked into a show that quickly since maybe the Wire. Glenn Close is just amazing. It was so good hat I initially had intended to watch an episode or two, and before I knew it, it was 2:30 and I was debating watching a fifth. Considering it is all I can normally do to make it past midnight, that says something.
I wish I didn’t have a ton of house stuff to do today or I would be watching all day.
Oh, and Tunch started a new “trick” this morning. I was sitting here at the computer working, he came in chirping and meowing and making a fuss, backed his ass up to the wall, and sprayed the wall with some vile substance. It was horrible and I swear I could smell it in mid-stream. Why don’t police use this stuff for crowd control? I screamed “WHAT ARE YOU DOING” so loud that Lily fell off the chair she was so startled and threw Tunch in the damned basement.
He’s never EVER done that before, so I’m worried he might have a bladder infection. That’s ok, because I AM MADE OF MONEY and don’t mind spending a hundred dollars every week on pet medical care.
The way you transitioned from Damages (excellent show in every incarnation so far) to Damages: Tunch Special Victims Unit was masterful.
You’re really getting good at this blogging thing.
I thought that was normal for male cats – they mark their territory that way.
My favorite transition is how Lily being startled off the chair propelled Tunch into the basement. Pet Pinball!
When cats do something unusual, it can be a sign that something is wrong. Probably has nothing to do with its bladder. It could be something very simple. Good luck, I hope Tunch is okay.
Problem with an anal gland? Cats have glands next to their anus that can get plugged and infected, and the liquid they excrete is very nasty smelling.
zuzu (not that one, the other one)
He probably needs his anal glands emptied out.
Dogs have those, too. I had a male dog that needed his “anal gland expressed” as the vet put it.
Aw, poor Tunchie. I hope he’s OK, and a picture of him (not spraying, though) would make ME feel better.
Vet tech in charge of expressing feline anal glands has always been very very high on my list of jobs I hope I never have.
I love my cats, but they can be hideous creatures who like to do things like spray the wall JUST BECAUSE THEY CAN and there is nothing you can do about it.
and they know that.
They know that you will spend months after watching their every move looking for that telltale twitch of the tail.
Dance, monkey, dance.
I really didn’t need to read this with a mouth full of burrito.
Poor kitty. John, just do some research and I’m sure Tunch will gladly let you express his glands.
John Cole @ Top:
Doesn’t this blog turn a small profit now?
Thank you. Added to the category of: Things I So Did Not Want To Know.
“Damages” is on DirecTV now, but I think they’re a few seasons in? I’ve heard nothing but good things about it, and need something to watch now that “Friday Night Lights” is over.
My vet sends me really lovely Christmas cards every year, and last time my Dad was over, he looked at the latest card and said “He really ought to send you a gift basket, with your vet bills you’ve probably sent his family on a few cruises by now.”
Sounds like territorial pissing to me too. Did he come across any new rivals for his turf? Or has some change at Castle
ColeTunch unsettled him?
Love, love Damages.
Our cat started peeing everywhere with the onset of his diabetes. The smell was stunning. The sweet guy would try to do it in places we couldn’t see which made us a different kind of crazy than Tunch is trying to make you.
I had a cocker spaniel back in the day whose anal glands would get backed up and needed to be expressed. So we took her to the vet to have it done. Poor vet accidentally shot herself right in the face with it.
That was the moment I knew I would never pursue a career in the medical field, human or veterinary.
Neutered males are not supposed to “spray”. But Straight Dope says:
Did Rosie figure out to get the better of Tunch?
It’s so good to have intrepid reporter McMegan back on her tough beat displaying the plight of the oppressed millionaires and billionaires under the overreaching forces of the horrible government that does so little to help promote the economic system in which they suffer so terribly.
Brian S (formerly Incertus)
We had a problem with Wally a couple of years ago and the vet let us know that apparently the new thinking on cat bladders is that they don’t really get infected, not with bacteria anyway. They can, however, get blocked, and that’s what will kill your cat inside of 36 hours. Wally had to stay over the weekend at the vet’s with a catheter in him so the bladder would drain and the swelling would go down, and then we had to keep him doped up for 5 days until the discomfort went away so he’d pee regularly and the crystals wouldn’t reform. As a result, he doesn’t get to eat dry food anymore, which pains him greatly since he used to lay in front of the dry food bowl, drop his face in it, and munch for hours.
I agree with the people above–it’s either his anal glands or he’s marking his territory. Good luck with that.
Jules is right.
He’s marking territory, and will now make it a habit.
Unless he’s showing signs of difficulty in the litter tray,save your vet money and invest in a gallon of Nature’s Miracle or some other “kitty de-stink”.
@BR: not usually if they’re neutered when they’re young (before it’s become a habit)… if it’s something new, it could be due to an infection, or emotional upset…
@John, what’s Rosie been doing lately… maybe Tunch is feeling your frustration with her and is acting out.
I started Netflix streaming of Damages a few weeks ago. But I have only had time to watch the first two episodes. And they horrified me.
Glen Close is awesome and her acting skills are amazing, but that show is mega-intense. I’m almost afraid to watch the next one.
I have an oldster that can scream for hours and must be watched near rugs, sofas, towels, pretty much anything soft and on the floor or he’ll piss on it. I’ve often wondered if any age is too old to be sent to shelter, but I just can’t do it. As annoying as he is, as blood pressure rising as he is, he’s my damn cat and this is his home. And no, nothing’s wrong with him besides age and a fresh case of hypotension, the pissing thing is partially his quirk, partially annoyance at not being allowed to sit next to us and literally scream at us for hours for (already present) food.
At least the Ultimate Tunch doesn’t do that. Give him a snuggle and take him to the vet.
@JenJen: Each season of Damages kind of starts over. Worth watching in order, but not absolutely necessary.
FNL, what a great show.
I hope it’s nothing serious. I’m sending good juju his way, my poor big fluffy ball of love!
If he’s just being a PITA- good luck with that.
Scritches to Tunchie.
@Jeff: My Maggie (yes, that’s her on Cute Overload) needed her anal glands expressed. After the vet forcibly sodomized her, she spent several hours lying there, waiting for death to release her from her shame. To further this, we had to put the cat-sized cone on her to keep her from licking her sore bum.
Dogs just don’t do injured dignity the way cats do.
John, if you’re going to take Tunch to the vet for this operation, warn them beforehand. They’ll want full body armour, and you’ll want hi-def video.
Oh yeah. My husband and I started watching this Friday afternoon – five hours later, our weekend houseguests arrived, and it was the hardest thing I could imagine to turn the TV off. Guests just left a half hour ago … I’m placing myself in front of the TV in 3 … 2… 1 …
I concur with the anal glands theory. Or, as our vet put it with a straight face, “Have you ever heard of anal sacks?” Why, yes we’ve heard of anal sex, but what does that have to do with our cat?
Blocked anal sacks are irritating for the cat, and the expunged nastiness is absolutely the foulest-smelling thing in the world. It’s almost impossible to describe how nasty it is.
If you’re worried it might be a bladder problem, watch him closely for a while. If he’s constantly visiting the litterbox, or if he starts squatting throughout the house like he has to pee but nothing comes out, take him to the vet immediately. It could be a blockage, which requires a catheter and (likely) a change of diet. Sadly, we have experience with that, too.
I’m betting anal sacks, though. When a male cat is blocked, he isn’t able to express much of anything.
You know there is no God when you hear about “plugged anal glands”.
@BGinCHI: Worth watching the Illini spank Purdon’t!
Jim, Foolish Literalist
I remember when Damages started, the ads had a clip of Glenn Close saying dramatically “Trust. No one.” and I thought, oy, what a sad cliché, and the reviews were lukewarm so I didn’t watch. Then one hungover, cold day, FX did a six episode marathon, and damn me if Glenn Close and writers didn’t manage to sell that cliché. I was hooked. Ted Danson is good, too, and the bald guy who plays Danson’s lawyer is as good as Close.
But, just to troll a little- the product placement– Cadillac and Bud Light– sometimes borders on hilarious.
He’s a cat being a cat. Isn’t that your new Zen approach to your familiars?
Unless it’s in the same sentence as “Roger Ailes”, “Rupert Murdoch”, or “Dick Cheney”.
My own elderly male kitty does this at time: we call it pishing. If it is urine, it is reaallly hard to remove the smell. One product that deters him is called NoMark! which is a hormone de-stressing thingy. Less than 10 bucks. Cheaper than a visit to the vet.
If it’s the gland thing, though, the vet is the only one you want dealing with it.
My first thought was anal glands, too. Tunch is letting you know something isn’t right, and probably where. Handle it now, so it doesn’t turn into anything worse.
My MC mix tried to tell me something was wrong w/her anal glands once, but she was always a little screechy, so I didn’t figure it out in time. A week later, I noticed she wasn’t following me around the house. She had a huge abscess in one of her anal glands, but her butt was so fluffy, it took the vet about three times going over her to find it. They rushed her into surgery on a Friday afternoon; it was scary, and as she was unprepared for surgery and had eaten recently, we had a disgustingly messy night afterwards.
So take him to the vet tomorrow and spare both of you more trouble (minus, perhaps, some antibiotics–though you may want to just spend the extra cash for the injected version if pilling Tunch is more than you want to try right now).
Tunch won’t appreciate it, but that’s not a cat’s job.
That’s it, I’m outta here. I don’t typically think of myself as a squeamish man, but this thread is disgusting and I can’t take anymore of it.
Yeah, I was reclining sort of on my side on the couch. He stepped over my head and HIS GODDAMN ANAL GLAND LEAKED ON MY FACE. It was immediately clear that my life would never again be worth living.
That passed, though, after some vinegar scrubbing of my face and a brief hot towling of his ass. (used some crappy old kitchen towel).
A vet said that if the cat is drinking too much water or eating too much wet food or has had the runs for a bit that the lack of fairly hard poop is a major cause.
To provide a diversion from the prior unpleasantness…
Shameless with Bill Macy is good – ah, Fiona…
I worked with someone who spent +/- $10K on her dogs Achilles tendons being repaired. One dog.
I just finished the first season of Damages via Netflix, too, and I have never in my life seen such sharp, tight plotting in any medium. They show you scenes and you think you know what’s going on and later they show you the scene and you have an entirely different interpretation of the thing and then they come back to the scene another time and everything is different again from what you saw either time before. It’s a remarkable piece of work. Great acting too, of course, but really the way the show is put together is astonishing.
We got back from Chicago last night and we’re trying to figure out why Keaton has diarrhea. The cat sitter would have mentioned it if he’d had it while she was here, so it seems to have come on suddenly.
He does have a very sensitive stomach, so it could just be the excitement of us being home again, but we’re going to keep an eye on him just in case.
@Turgid Jacobian: they sell .22 rat shot for this exact occasion.
@Turgid Jacobian: “drinking too much water or eating too much wet food”
Wet food is actually a good thing for cats and their anal glands. Most of a cat’s diet in nature is protein based, leading to hard poops that naturally express the anal glands a little bit every time they squat. It’s the carb-heavy kibble diets that give too much fibre, leading to many soft poops that let the smell-that-ends-the-world build up and get impacted.
And too much water isn’t an issue–it goes out through the bladder, and it doesn’t soften the shits, and cats tend to underdrink anyway.
My guess is Tunch is just marking his territory, but it is odd that this is the first time he’s done it.
One of my neighbors had a cat they let run around outside, and the bastard decided my yard was part of his territory, including my car. The cat would spray the grill. I’d get in the car to go to work, turn on the defroster (nearly every day here the pac nw) and get hit with THAT SMELL. Rinsing the grill helped, but that wasn’t something I could do every morning. Several times the smell was so bad I had to open the window and lean my head out so I wouldn’t puke.
I love animals, but if I had caught that cat he would have been injured.
I have nothing to say about stinky cat secretions.
However, speaking of streaming Netflix, I would recommend the doc about the recording of the Stones’ “Exile on Main Street.” It’s only an hour long, is comprised mostly of footage from the time (1972), and contains lots of salacious details that make rockumentaries so much fun.
did anyone else when they read “expressing their anal sacks” think “tea party”????
Probably anal glands, but just in case it’s a bladder issue (crystals, blockage, potential ugly death) you do want to take Tunch into the vet’s tomorrow. (As others have made clear, if it is anal glands, you want the professionals to deal with it.) Did it smell more like concentrated shit, or the foul essence of a public urinal during a prolonged heat wave?
Either way, best product to use for cleaning & destinking that wall (and any other areas Tunch might’ve expressed his problems on) is Odormute, available online if your local big-box pet store or feed supply doesn’t stock it.
@Jim, Foolish Literalist:
“Trust. No one.”
By the end of the show I believed that to my core (at least as far as that show’s world goes).
“ah Fiona” is right. The show itself doesn’t do much for me though.
Re: Netflix Instant – absolutely get Bela Fleck: Throw Down Your Heart.
@Mnemosyne: Our first dog developed stress colitis every time we were separated for “too long”. If that’s Keaton’s problem, he should be okay within 24 hours — otherwise, I’d take him into the vet just in case.
Glad you survived Chicago’s frozen tundras, incidentally.
I vote for anal glands. My dear departed Freddy (who looked just like Tunch) used to scoot around the carpet on his butt, and that’s when we knew it was time to take him to the vet to get “expressed.” It shouldn’t cost too much.
Sounds like anal glands to me — urine smells like cat piss, which you’re no doubt very familiar with, but what we call “ass juice” takes noisomeness to a whole new level. The first time you smell this stuff is truly a WTF moment — we’ve had cats for many years but didn’t get blasted with this foulitude until our most recent adoptees. On the bright side, if that’s all it is, the vet bill isn’t likely to be huge (our Manhattan vet charges $30-something to express the glands). Also, we have something called Fresh Wave “all-natural odor neutralizing spray” which sorta-kinda helps. Good luck.
Short Bus Bully
I’ll trade you my kids’ college educations for your vet trips.
I will be checking out Damages, thanks for the recommendation.
You Don't Say
Anal glands. If no one else mentioned, it’s easy to tell because the stuff that gets excreted is black. Smells terrible.
Most times when a cat changes their potty behavior, it signifies a change in health, so take Tunchies to the vet. It is probably correctable (probably the anal glands too)
My cat recently started peeing out the front of the litter box. She walks in, pees right out the door, turns around, digs a little, starts to climb out, looks at the pool of pee, looks up at me to say “Why do I have to live in filth?”, leaps over it and walks away. Sometimes she will mix things up by turning around 360 degrees upon entering the litter box, and then peeing out the door.
This signifies that she is 16, slightly senile, and dumb. The litter box is now in the bathtub of the guest bathroom.
Concur with the anal sacs thoughts above — if it really smelt “otherwordly” it’s unlikely to be straight up cat pee.
We have never had issues with any of our cats, but both the beagles have had to had this done. The last time the little beagle was afflicted/impacted and something “blew” in the middle of the night — IN OUR BED. Woke us both up from a deep sleep wondering WTF is that horrific smell. Nothing else quite like it..
Poor Tunch! This will be an ugly vet visit.
Probably anal glands. I had a cat that would occasionally get an infected anal gland and need a vet trip (and antibiotics). Take Tunch to the vet for a checkup.
When I was having renovation work done on my small island house, there was of course considerable turmoil and noise. Finally one of my cats (a former male) waited until I was in the room, and, looking me squarely and defiantly in the eye, peed copiously all over the newly installed cypress wall. As far as I could tell, it was only a “Okay, I’ve had enough of all this hassle” message; after the crew left a few days later, he caused no problems.
From what little I know and from what you’ve said about Tunch’s complaining beforehand, I’d suspect the lovely glands as well. Good luck.
He’s upset that he’s not getting enough visibility with us, his minions. Moar pix, please!
Here’s a video on expressing the anal glands (with a seemingly unrelated Kardashian ad), and it’s strongly recommended you NOT do it on your own at home. One of my cats had impacted glands a few years ago, and when the gland exploded at the vet emergency clinic, it ruined three sets of veterinary scrubs and hit the wall with spectacular foulness.
@pika: I absolutely REFUSE to watch that video. LMAO.
My OBGYN gave me a DVD about IUD insertion recently. (I bet it’s a BFD.) I also refuse to watch that one. There are times that I am extraordinarily pleased that I studied architecture and not assholes/cervixes, even if the pay is crap in comparison.
I am on a gazillion email lists, which is where I heard about this pet saver, pet tech app you can use on your ipad, among other thingys. I don’t know much more about it than that, but it seems like it might be useful if you have a houseful of animals.
@celiadexter: Of all the descriptive phrases on this thread, “ass juice” is my favorite!
@Justin: Awwwww, Maggie is teh cuteness! I’m glad I’ve never had the anal glands problem with my boys, knock wood.
@Justin: Looks like I misremembered the justification. Thx for the correction!
@asiangrrlMN: She’s a repeat star on CO. We’re very proud of her.
You need to tell the neighbor to neuter the male that should stop some of the marking.
We have a grey cat that goes around screaming like it’s being tortured and I think it goes into yards and marks territory.
That paragraph was a thing of beauty.
@Cain: The problem was, I didn’t know whose cat it was. Roamed all over the neighborhood so it lived close by. Luckily, this was a few years ago and the cat has since disappeared.
I’d have thought the connection between anal glands and the Kardashian Ascendancy was not too too remote.
You’re not alone, which is how ol’ Gil managed to corner a market without even intending to.
Wile E. Quixote
And there you have it, a succinct, one paragraph explanation of the motivating factors behind modern conservatism. I’ll stop there though because I feel that comparing cats and conservatives is unfair to cats, although I wonder if I could get conservatives to run headlong into a wall chasing the spot from a laser pointer.
Damages is good. One of the shows we regularly watch. Glenn Close is excellent in her role as well as the other leading lady.
Another series we found last month on Netflix streaming we became hooked on is Spartacus. I know, gladiators. Not normally the kind of stuff I’d watch, and certainly not the SO whose taste runs more toward something like Frida. Plus she doesn’t like violence in her entertainment. However Spartacus has over the top blood. Plus fair amount of full nudity tits and ass. Damn near soft porn at times. But those elements fit in the well-written storyline rather than just tossed in. Good acting too. Nice thing is Netflix is streaming the current season as well.
Maybe when you get caught up on Damages give Spartacus a look. Since your life now is taken up catering to your pets probably the closest thing you’d get to sex.
Just what I have been thinking as I watch … on episode 9, season 1 now. Gotta go.
Dept. of Massive Injustice:
“The House That Built Me” did not get Best Country Song. No one gets up in the morning and wishes that they had written “Need You Now” except if it was for the money. It was the performances that sold that one.
(OTOH “As She’s Walking Away” got Collaboration with Vocals, and that was the only fair winner.)
@Wile E. Quixote:
If you scream “Black people on welfare” as you move the laser pointer, you could probably get the sad bastards to start gumming their way through the wall, never mind chasing the little red light at the end of the tunnel.
So Tunch finds you hunched over that goddamn computer AGAIN and you just ignore him AGAIN and he’s mad as hell, not gonna take that CRAP any more. So this time he ups and showboats into your very own personal space, snarkily carols “Ignore THIS one Sucka” and goes all Republican on your wall.
Remember how it was before two dogs and a blog? He does.
Early symptoms of a bladder problem are 1) a tiny drop of clear snot that seems a permanent fixture on his nose or 2) a perpetually runny eye. Critical symptoms are obsessive crotch licking, often with pauses to stare fixedly with mouth slightly agape (cat sign for “that stinks”); or wincing after a jump and freaking at being poked in front of the hind legs; repeated attempts to urinate in unusual places; blood spots after urination, and a sudden fear of the litter box. Urine is cloudy, thick, oily and foul smelling.
Adding vitamin C to his diet will prevent/cure the problem. Powdered crystal C is cheap at the grocery store. Just stir a third of a teaspoon or so into each can of wet food. If he’s stopped eating, or has serious symptoms give liquid C with an eyedropper several times a day. If he develops a twitchy head from that, cut back on the dosage. (My last pair of cats lived for 20 years, and never needed a Vet btw).
Damages Season Two was just crazily intense. Over the holidays I started watching with my mom who typically falls asleep 20 minutes in to EVERYTHING. She made me stay up to 4 AM to watch one after another!
Everyone is great: William Hurt, Marcia Gay Harding, Timothy Oliphant, and a whole bunch of hey it’s that guy character actors. Darrell Hammond even played a superbly creepy henchman fixer.
If he’s fixed, and he is older, anal glands are suspect as many have said. Bladder infection is possible too. If this is a one off behavior, particularly so.
That he is marking is unlikely since you haven’t introduced another cat in the house and he would appear not to have done this before, when you brought the dogs in.
But he did come to you to tell you that he was in distress. So, hard to believe, you are the alpha and he wants help. Maybe the basement thing was a bit harsh.
Also, definitely lay in a supply of Miracle Pet or other enzymatic cleaner made for cat urine. The glands and urine are a particular protein you will not clean up any other way, you have to get all of it, or he will continue to use that spot for expressing… himself.
And worse, the dogs could be set off by it too. Until you figure it out, do not let him back in bed. If it is a bladder infection, there is something about smooth cool sheets that makes them pee right there.
Not completely on topic but I’ve got two 100-ish pound dog-beast with very productive anal glands. They each get a scoop of organic canned pumpkin in their food each meal. Its low carb but gives them dietary fiber which seems to keep the glands unclogged. A truely vile substance but at least it oxidizes quickly.
@stuckinred: Ha Ha Ha.
Is Tunch still in the basement :(
Angry Black Lady
i love damages so hard. i watch it when i need to find my inner patty hewes. or if i’m considering murdering someone.
Angry Black Lady
season 2 is almost better than season 1. season 3 lost me a little, but still far better than most of the crap on the teevee.
william hurt and marcia gay harden are uh-mazing.
Just for what it’s worth, for the poster whose cat has blood pressure problems, treating blood pressure in cats is easy and relatively affordable (assuming you have a good vet). For my cats, I bought human blood pressure meds, had them compounded (according to the vet’s prescription) by a compounding pharmacy into a flavored liquid that my cats found acceptable, and just squirted the right amount of liquid into their mouths. When the blood pressure’s under control, cats feel better and are much more well-behaved.
Season 1 of Damages, unfortunately, is the high point of the show. Season 2 is good, but not nearly as good as season 1. Season 3 had a fantastic amount of potential, but you can tell about halfway through writing they found out that FX was not going to renew. So they have to wrap about a whole bunch of stuff from seasons 1 and 2 really fast. And the last season is really a bit disappointing.
I hear there is a 10 ep season on another channel starting soon, or just started. I am going to have to look that up soon.
@Angry Black Lady: Marcia Gay Harden was amazing. I hoped so badly for her character to return in season 3. William Hurt just sort of looked lost and constipated most of the time. I thought that Lily Tomlin in season 3 was just amazing. So was the guy who played the main bad guy, even if he also plays the weird rich guy in that USA show about the boutique physicians.
Damages is a very well done pot boiler. I thought Season 2 superior to Season 1. I’m taking a break before enjoying Season 3.
A couple of bones to pick:
the flash forward scenes are gimmicky and distracting
multiple murders aren’t needed for suspense
Another excellent series on TV right now is Justified on FX. Based on a series of Elmore Leonard novels, and starring Timothy Olyphant (who played Marshal Bullock on “Deadwood” and had a part in “Damages” as well).
I know I shouldn’t have laughed until I cried but I couldn’t help it.
Thats something interesting to me.