Demonstrating that not only does he have a finger on the beating heart of fashion, but also public opinion, the Fonz links to this gibberish from some random crank on Reddit:
The KOCH brothers must be stopped. They gave $40K to Scott Walker, the MAX allowed by state law. That’s small potatoes compared to the $100+ million they give to other organizations. These organizations will terrify you. If the anti-union thing weren’t enough, here are bigger and better reasons to stop the evil Kochs. They are trying to:
1. decriminalize drugs
2. legalize gay marriage
3. repeal the Patriot Act
4. end the police state
5. cut defense spending.
Gillespie claims this will have a hand in “complicating dumb media narratives and blowing the minds of some of your leftard friends…”
You seriously can not spoof this guy. Is this what happens when you spend too much time on late night Fox shows?
Anonymous At Work
Does this mean that the Koch brothers have funded major intiatives and candidates with these goals? Or does it mean that they fund Reason and these, along with environmental deregulation, are among Reason’s goals?
Jay C
Dunno about the rest of you, but if this list is true, it’s the most positive thing I’ve ever heard about the Koch brothers EVER!
Sly
I’m sure David Koch cut a million dollar check to the Republican Governors Association in an attempt to “end the police state.”
What a fucking chode.
Comrade Dread
Well, obviously, they’d need legal drugs. If the masses are sufficiently doped up, they won’t bother with revolt or demands for anything but more Cheetos and Taco Bell.
Downpuppy
Gee, he’s defending the guy who signs his checks. Shocking!
The Libertarian fail of the week is McMegan, talking about Greece, simply going all in on bashing the lazy wogs.
Her minions pile on in a display of old school racism that hasn’t been seen since 1943.
Morbo
Step 1: find the most downvoted comment on politics page.
Step 2: blockquote on your website
Step 3: ???
Step 4: profit!
ed drone
Well, if the T-party twits really believed those were Koch aims, either they would turn on the Kochs, OR would start supporting those positions.
WIN!
Warren Terra
I’m sure they have all sorts of good ideas. Given their druthers, they’d be perfectly happy with sunny days and fluffy kittens. And it’s nice that they support some actual legislative positions that the Fonz isn’t embarrassed to mention.
Still, he rather is overlooking a few other legislative positions that seem both to be considerably more objectionable and to be plausible, and which seem to get a lot more effective lobbying support from the Koch brothers and their ilk, than do marijuana legalization or fluffy kittens. I’m thinking of the legislation banning collective bargaining, or the no-bid sell-off of stateowned hearing and power plants. Funny those don’t make it onto the Fonz’s list.
Chuck Butcher
You might wonder how that much brain damage allows for keyboarding…
gnomedad
What the hell is with the “No Teacher Left Behind” ad? They’re sending killer robots after them now?
jl
Why is Cole trying to figure it out?
That way lies madness, but I guess that is what Cole wants.
Cole, I suggest you try to the same spiritual awakening you had with Rosie to the Reason bunch. Say the same things except plug in ‘extreme libertarians’ where ‘dog’ went.
Then you will have time to do more useful things. There are a lot of more useful things to do. For example, I remember a skit on the Daily Show where one of the correspondents worked on putting his whole fist into his mouth. I guess he wanted to a new bar stunt, or something.
jeffreyw
@Comrade Dread: Soma
Elia
No better source for enlightened debate and information on politics than reddit.
gnomedad
@gnomedad:
Image
Ash Can
As usual, Nickie’s kidding himself. If his joint ever stopped bashing labor unions, the Kochs would drop him like a prom dress.
Violet
Wow. Reddit. Now that’s some mighty fine investigative journalism. Do you think “a commenter on a blog” is going to get the Pulitzer this year?
A Commenter at Balloon Juice (formerlyThe Grand Panjandrum)
I read the entire reddit post and that has got to be some sort of weak attempt at comedy/satire/irony, or whatever, because later on the author wrote:
Or maybe the post was written by one of the numbnuts carrying the “Keep the government out of my Medicare” signs.
Either way the Fonzi of Freedom got hoodwinked.
Guster
How long would it take a random, unknown guy on the internets to develop a passionate following among glibertarians using only a deeply idiotic blog?
Redshirt
Does anyone know, or know where to find, a listing of the Koch business interests? I’d like to start a personal boycott ASAP. I know they own some paper concerns – GP?
Old Gringo
I think that’s what a Rothbardian sounds like. Lew Rockwellians and the like. Ron Paul if he hadn’t honed that fine edge as your crazy but kindly uncle. On the other hand;
These are all stated goals (putatively) of organizations in the Catosphere. It’s the economic theory (or theories, Austrian School)they espouse that are so bizarre. It’s a form of right wing anarchism.
Martin
@A Commenter at Balloon Juice (formerlyThe Grand Panjandrum):
Unpossible!
piratedan
wasn’t reddit the site that had full time conservative wannabee bloggers on it who would take shifts downgrading anything positive/liberal/democratic inclined in order to promote their own nascent agenda?
Violet
@Redshirt:
From Wikipedia about Koch Industries:
A commenter on a blog, (formerly Jay C)
@Violet:
Probably not, but they are a definite candidate for TIME’s “Person of the Year”
Warren Terra
The temptation to go a pure Godwin on this is strong, but I’ll limit myself to a Modified Limited Godwin, and point out that Gillespie’s argument here doesn’t even amount to pointing out to critics of John Wilkes Booth that they’re overlooking what a fine actor he was; it’s more like pointing out to critics of John Hinckley that they’re overlooking how much appreciation he had for fine acting.
Cliff
1: so? free market bitches
2: Freedom!
3: W00T Facism sux!
4: umm… Duh!!
5: Yay!!
trollhattan
Over at powerline, they’re pleading the Lieburals to “Leave the lonely Kochs aloooooooone!”
http://www.rumproast.com/index.php/site/comments/messrs._lonely/
Whatever shall they do? I advise purchasing new friends at a million per.
Mark S.
I’m beginning to think Fonzi is an idiot.
Guster
@Violet: In addition to what Violet said, you’ll also have to stop attention John Birch Society meetings.
jl
off topic, but an interesting and sobering graph that shows how unemployment duration is doing so far in our so called economic recovery.
Median Duration of Unemployment
http://economistsview.typepad.com/economistsview/2011/02/median.html
From Mark Thoma’s Economists View blog.
Note that the median duration of unemployment is doing very well, thank you very much. It is as if it had sprouted wings and taken majestic flight, and is now soaring like an eagle above our earthly bounds.
It is inspiring. Yet when I think about US economic policy, I feel a sense of welling disgust and nausea.
I cannot figure out what to make of my reaction.
Guster
@Guster: Stop _attending_ …
Everyone but me already knows that the Edit function is broken?
sacman701
#17: Yeah, that post was intended as satire. For another thing, people who support the police state don’t use the term “police state”.
kdaug
@Anonymous At Work: Nice handle… well played.
MikeJ
Yes, if you want to legalize gay marriage, cut defense spending, and all the rest the logical way to do it is by propping up republicans.
Martin
@Redshirt: http://www.kochind.com/IndustryAreas/default.asp
Easy to boycott if you live off the grid and grow your own organic food.
Less Popular Tim
@Sly:
“chode,” huh? Is that like a “cudlip”?
Bob
This part, “?????,” made sense.
elm
@Anonymous At Work: That appears to be it. The Kochs fund Reason & CATO, so we should ignore the policies of the candidates they fund.
freelancer
The Koch’s support the Reasonoids because of their dum-dum Randian worship of economic hoarding at the top. That they (meaning only Balko really) also report on the militarization of police is incidental and tangential to the reasons the Koch’s actually fund them.
It’s not like the constituency that now makes up the Tea Party was ever against the Drug War or police overreach (See the 2008 GOP National Convention in Minneapolis)during the Bush years. This is a Notable Fact.
jl
@Guster:
Yeah, I guess, but what the hell. God knows what would happen if they tried to fix it.
These mysterious dysfunctions are what makes BJ seem just like family!
Sly
@Downpuppy:
McMegan, in what is no doubt a colossal surprise to all, does not know her labor history.
The danger of public worker strikes is the intrinsic potential to hurt the local residents. So instead you just start giving them services for free and tell the central bureaucracy to go fuck itself. Bus drivers give free rides, hospital administrators refuse to fill out paperwork, toll collectors let everyone pass on by, etc.
They’re called “Good Work Strikes,” and for obvious reasons they’re very effective.
Old Gringo
I didn’t see that. Maybe not quite an adherent of the “Austrian School,” but then, it is complete kookery, so who can say. If it isn’t satire, it’s an adherent of Stormfront.org
Elia
@Old Gringo: Yeah but you can’t enforce the Austrian economic philosophy without significant state power, anyway. The whole thing is just a crock of shit.
General Stuck
Or a six month weekend with Quadaffi
John Cole
Does anyone know what the Koch Industries domestic partnership policy is like? What kind of benefits do they offer for employees? And they don’t have drug testing, do they? Can anyone look that up? I mean surely, if that is their goal, legalizing gay marriage and ending the drug war, they would start at home.
And I honestly do not know. They very well might. I have no idea where to begin to look.
asiangrrlMN
@Redshirt: From the GOS, here’s a list.
@jl: They need to fix it. I am pissed off because I can’t do my patented triple reply or reply to a comment made after mine.
srv
I think this is really an example of Reddit’s Cuil Theory:
http://cuiltheory.wikidot.com/what-is-cuil-theory
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
Did someone say, “Useful idiot”?
geg6
@Redshirt:
I’m pretty sure Charmin and Bounty are in the Koch family businesses.
Alwhite
@A commenter on a blog, (formerly Jay C):
If the powertools (AKA assrocket and chode) can be TIMES blog of the year than any random tard with a keyboard is over qualified for the honor.
jl
@asiangrrlMN:
Just do the ‘thought experiment’ Cole did with Rosie, except say ‘miserable lefty Balloon-Juice blog’ instead of ‘Rosie’.
That is my advice to everyone today, for the sake of inner peace.
Redshirt
Damn. Georgia-Pacific paper owns like 3/4ths of Maine. :(
Jules
How old are these fuckers anyway?
Is there any possibility we can all just wait the Koch Brothers out?
They have to die sometime….
Punchy
You just curb-stomped Kay’s post!
geg6
@freelancer:
The Reasonoids are all (including Balko, who is just as stupid as the rest of them in every way because he thinks his anti-drug war/police state shit actually matters to the Kochs) useful idiots. In fact, I’m of the opinion that the definition of “libertarian” should just be changed to “useful idiots for the oligarchy and GOP.” Because that is really all they are.
Downpuppy
@Sly: Sure, all the stuff the Greeks are doing has been done in Switzerland & Germany.
But the errors of the Megan & her dittoheads are less obvious than their ugliness this time.
Batocchio
Has Nick Gillepsie written something honest and intelligent, ever? Perhaps once upon a time, long, long ago? I’m asking because everything I’ve seen linked from him in the past few months has been factually wrong, laughably inept or farcically disingenuous. For reference, those would be 1) his inaccurate meat-budget model 2) attacking librarians as overpaid and claiming public libraries serve the elite, and 3) his attack on Social Security, claiming (among others things) that it was essentially theft and the poor were badly served by it. Oh, and all those claims, there’s been his characteristic smugness. From what I can see, he’s not making a good name for glibertarians, Koch whores and aging Fonzi impersonators.
batgirl
@John Cole: I don’t know about domestic partnerships but I went to their website and looked at a job ad. At the bottom is this:
Allan
@John Cole:
Koch Industries “careers” homepage. Doing a deeper dive into their lines of business for more details. BBL.
jibeaux
@Sly:
So cynical. I’m sure there are many, many Republican governors leading the charge to legalize drugs and gay marriage. It’s probably in the standard Republican Governor candidate contract, even.
harokin
I’m constantly astounded by the whole “it was only $40,000” meme.
Lee
Actually Digg was the site with the conservative brigade to bury liberal stories and move conservative stories to the front.
When Digg tanked, they moved to reddit. They are now trying to game the system there but have been mostly unsuccessful.
asiangrrlMN
@jl: True. Very true. In the grand scheme of things, it’s…still driving me nuts! FYWP!
wenchacha
I’m late to Reason and Freedom Fonze, happily. Is he related in any way to that weasel-douche Ed Gillespie? The fact that he sports a chin suggests not, but he has the same enthusiasm for
lovingfluffing the rich as ol’ Ed.jibeaux
As for boycotts, yep, seem to hard to avoid, but a good place to start might be with buying recycled paper products. I do this anyway since reading about how wasteful it is to use virgin trees for toilet paper and remembering The Giving Tree, big ol’ bleedin heart that I am. There’s a brand that they don’t seem to stock in many stores around here but that is constantly running coupons in the paper, can’t remember the name.
Warren Terra
@Less Popular Tim:
I’m pretty sure it’s a mis-spelling of choad.
freelancer
@Punchy:
The tyranny! It was only up top for like 3 hours!
Sly
@elm:
Don’t think so. They denote different kinds of inferential meanings. I’m not calling Fonzie stupid, I’m calling him useless. To be specific, I’m making a reference implying that Gillespie is about as useful as a dick that is wider than it is long.
I’m not exactly sure how Motoko-chan intends to use “cudlip” in her attacks on anyone who doesn’t find the same joy and aesthetic meaning she apparently does in her “Hack Teh Gibson” version of Islam (or whatever the fuck she’s talking about… does anyone actually know? Someone took my crazy troll decoder ring), but I think she’s just calling everyone stupid.
asiangrrlMN
Here’
batgirl
For a list of Georgia Pacific brands go here: http://www.gp.com/forYourHome/viewbrands.html
Old Gringo
Quite a few states seem to have laws requiring them, “Drug Free Workplace” laws. Others have some protections. Some no laws regarding them at all
This is interesting, if it is accurate and up to date:
Ash Can
@trollhattan: LOL! Sounds like the Powertools are cadging for a handout from the Kochs.
Villago Delenda Est
Should the Kochs ever get into the industrial side of the military-industrial complex to any significant degree, their imagined opposition to lots of defense spending will evaporate like a summer shower.
Mark S.
@geg6:
Amen to that. There is absolutely no economic policy Reason favors that wouldn’t make Koch and other billionaires much richer.
@Batocchio:
No, the man is a complete jackass.
MonkeyBoy
The rant was posted by user ‘epistemicfail’.
One major goal of current day Republicans and Libertarians is to destroy epistemology.
Epistemology is in part
Shinobi
A friend of mine shared this on his google reader, as if un-sourced right wing craziness was somehow proof of something.
My favorite part is when he’s all “The Koch brothers finance part of Reason magazine, here are a few other articles written about the Koch brothers that were also paid for by the Koch brothers.”
MonkeyBoy
That rant was posted by user ‘epistemicfail’.
One major goal of current day Republicans and Libertarians is to destroy epistemology.
Epistemology is in part
MonkeyBoy
FYWP
That rant was posted by user ‘epistemicfail’.
One major goal of current day Republicans and Libertarians is to destroy epistemology.
Epistemology is in part
Redshirt
@MonkeyBoy: No doubt. I’ve been saying for awhile that this crop of “repuglicans” are the greatest post-modernists this world has ever seen. French Philosophers would drop their hand-rolled cigarettes in shock at how far they’ve taken the concept “there is no truth but what we make”, and made a Global Reality of it.
Allan
@Old Gringo: HR guy here. The Federal Drug Free Workplace Act does not specifically require pre-employment or random drug screening.
From the DOL FAQs:
Old Gringo
I’d say the Kochs are already in the MIC, and they certainly benefit from it and the defense budget. As Elia observed upthread, their “Free Market” exists because the US military defends. And armies no longer march on their stomachs. It’s all in the gas tanks now.
asiangrrlMN
Here’s the thing. Even if I were to take Fonzie at face value* and believe that the Koch brothers were for all those things–the fact that they want to negate collective bargaining pretty much negates it all. There are plenty of people who support all the things listed above without wanting to bust unions. They’re called Democrats.
*Which I don’t. I’m just giving him the benefit of the doubt for the sake of making a point.
Mattminus
Huh, looks like I got banned from Radley Balko’s comment section for pointing out that the article he ran about how labor unions in the 30’s where racist had nothing to do with libertarianism and then wondering if his paymaster had anything to do with the editorial selection.
They’re getting a bit thin skinned about that.
Jay
I get a bit worked up whenever somebody throws out an insult with “-tard” as a suffix, so in answer to Gillespie’s single ugly word, here’s a comparatively long response:
Dude, you’re a glib little bitch who would let “the market” take care of people with special needs, which would cause them to be forever condemned to closets, institutions, and/or the streets.
Fuck you.
cleek
@Redshirt:
FYI, the Kochs (and the Irish) hate kittens.
Gus
@Less Popular Tim: No, choad (properly spelled) is a perfectly cromulent word.
Allan
@John Cole: Update: of the Koch Industries companies, only Georgia-Pacific has information on their careers website that offers significant detail about their employee benefits, and they do offer coverage to same-sex domestic partners for health-dental insurance.
None of their summaries of their employment diversity policies specifically include “sexual orientation” or “gender expression” though there is some weasel language about other protections under the law, which means they won’t discriminate on those bases in a jurisdiction where they are illegal. Woot!
All job postings at all companies reference drug testing where permitted by law, and that means almost everywhere in the US.
I have emails in to the “contact us” links at the other Koch Industries sites to get more info on their policies on sexual orientation and same-sex partner benefits, and I’m confident that I will receive blazingly fast responses from those vigilantly monitored in-boxes. Snark based in part on none of them using an auto-reply message to confirm that my message has been received.
TEL
There’s actually a debate in the comments of that post about whether child labor laws should exist – after all, shouldn’t the parent decide, not the state?
I cannot believe I wasted time reading that crap. I’m really really hoping my snarkmeter failed and they weren’t actually being serious.
Inspired by Koch
What’s missing from the list is what else the Kochs have been involved in: pushing NAFTA years ago, and nowadays pushing for loose immig.
For instance, back in 2004, GWB proposed a “guest” plan that would have reduced many middle-class wages to world levels. That anti- and un-American plan was “inspired” by a CATO loose/open borders hack. My name’s link is a video of a Bush assistant explaining how the plan would be like a massive H1B for almost every job, specifically mentioning nurses and teachers.
Of course, the Dems completely failed to note what GWB wanted to do during the election. So, there might be more common ground between at least Dem leaders and the Kochs.
Angry Black Lady
@geg6: From the Kochsite “Georgia-Pacific’s familiar consumer brands in North America include Quilted Northern®, Angel Soft®, Brawny®, Sparkle® , Soft ‘n Gentle®, Mardi Gras®, Vanity Fair®, and the Dixie® brand of tabletop products.”
this really pisses me off, because i am ALWAYS running low on TP and PT, and tend to order them when I order groceries. of course the online grocery store only has angel soft TP and brawny PT, so now i have to, like, GO TO THE STORE.
stupid kochsuckers making me go to the damn store.
#firstworldproblems
wazmo
It’s time to start the drive to unionize every single employee of Koch Industries-that way, instead of spending their shekels on buying off politicans he’d have to spend them on anti-union activities-and you can bet dollars to donuts someone in the Kochotopus empire will mess up badly.
b-psycho
@asiangrrlMN:
…then who are those motherfuckers calling themselves by that name that keep silently nodding at militarism & the police state whenever the subjects come up? Y’know, the ones with actual political power?
Hart Williams
Oh, come on. The Fonz is paid by the Kochs (as he notes at the end of his ‘column’).
And, with his saddle soap on the line … this is the best he can come up with?
They ain’t makin’ them Ayn Rand Supermen like they used to. On a happier note, Rand Paul was on Letterman last night, and made the case for all banjo-playin’ Libertrenenennsz.
Squeal like a pig!