I would like to shove my foot directly up this asshole’s giant loophole.
The Teabilly assholes in Indiana are trying to pass HB 1210. It’s an abortion bill because of course it is. And concerned Rep. Turner is concerned — that women are going to lie about rape and incest to get… oh, go read the title of this post. I don’t even want to type it again:
TURNER: With all do respect to Rep. Riecken, I understand what she’s trying to do. But as you know that when the federal health care bill was going through Congress there was a lot of discussion whether this would allow for abortion coverage and of course we were all told it would not. And the bill, my house bill 1210, would prevent that for any insurance company to provide abortion coverage under federal health care bill. This [amendment] would open that window and I would ask you to oppose this amendment.
I just want you to think about this, in my view, giant loophole that could be created where someone who could — now i want to be careful, I don’t want to disparage in any way someone who has gone through the experience of a rape or incest — but someone who is desirous of an abortion could simply say that they’ve been raped or there’s incest.
Tomorrow? Before I birth my half dozen spite babies? I’m going to abort one and then say it raped me.
Yeah, that’s right. I was raped from the inside by a fetus.
What?!
It’s no more ridiculous than the rest of the shit the Republicans are throwing in our faces.
So, that’s — divide by two, carry the one — 5 Angry Black Babies coming right up.
(H/T sukabi!)
[via Think Progress]
[cross-posted or whatever]
Omnes Omnibus
Before aborting your spite baby, don’t you need the “spite father’s” permission or haven’t they passed that one yet?
Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason
“This is a Fire.” Perfect. I finally noticed your semi-subtle graphics in your posts, ABL. They complement the rants quite nicely.
Wouldn’t it be nice if we lived in a world where fewer rants were needed, though … what’s that smell? Smells like … UNICORN FARTS!!!!
ETA +4 (how could I forget that?) Off to crash for work tomorrow.
piratedan
but this is all really about jobs, because we all know that what it comes down to is that many minority women refuse to have babies until there is a cushy public sector job waiting for their child upon reaching their adulthood. Bleeping legislative concern troll.
asiangrrlMN
FYWP. I can’t even use the word in a post that uses the word?????
Because once you declare rape and/or insect (reverse the s and c), BOOM! Your word gets taken just like that without any further verification.
Excuse me, but what figging planet do these anus berets come from, and please, for the love of all that is good and somewhat merciful, can their home planet overlords and ladies Rapture them back?
On the plus side, I cracked up at the ending bit after the vid (which, I must confess, I did not watch as my head is hanging onto my neck by the slimmest thread already), which was both a welcome relief from and a disturbing distraction from my rage at these jackholes.
Martin
2012 is going to be fucking awesome. Which candidate will be the first out of the gate to propose a national ‘life panel’, a group of family value patriots that go around and lojack the uterus of 13 year-olds.
Yutsano
@asiangrrlMN:
Hon, how many times has JC trolled us on that exact same fact?
Fuck that. They can have this miserable rock. I’m outta here and off exploring the universe as soon as my alien peeps show up. I might be able to get you a room on the ship too. I’m pretty sure there will be spousal privileges. And it would be fun to watch Pedro in zero-G.
Quicksand
X-TREME.
Martin
@asiangrrlMN: For the record, I’m opposed to abortions in the case of insect. It’s so much easier to just step on them.
Martin
@Quicksand: Makes sense. That’s like having home field advantage for a rapist.
scav
They make it sound all so enjoyable and trendy, as though women might be going out and getting themselves raped for the sheer monumental pleasure of having a freebie abortion on the govt’s dime.
asiangrrlMN
@Yutsano: This is true. They can have earth, and we’ll go take a flight into space. Let’s go!
Good to see ya, hon. How you be?
@Martin: Snort snicker. So true!
MattR
@Yutsano:
And this is why there would be no shortage of volunteers for a one way trip to Mars as the advance team for a permanent colony (as was floated by someone or another a few months back)
@asiangrrlMN: If you can remember it is a bad word, you can sneak past WP by using numbers instead of letters ala 1ncest.
Joseph Nobles
Rape as a reason for abortion is already getting a pushback. Won’t it be nice when genetics can determine the viability of an incest fetus so we can know whether to let those come to term as well? And then we can pick up loitering females on some charge or another and use them to bring all the snowflakes from fertility clinics to term.
Let’s face it: once the masculine sperm cell has graced the lowly egg with life, there are no backsies. Life begins at erection… er, conception.
(Thanks, Bill Maher, for that last joke.)
Yutsano
@asiangrrlMN: My back is sore and I had a massive bout of insomnia last night that is still kind of affecting me. On the plus side I’m gonna make a pot of soup for work tomorrow so that’ll be good. It’ll have to be warmed up when I get there but we have microwaves.
Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)
I suck. All of the action moves to a new thread just as soon as my posts in the last one are removed from moderation.
KG
Will this law be overturned by the anti-sharia law? No laws based on foreign religious doctrine… Like the New Testament?
Martin
Wait, if you’re raped from the inside by your fetus, that’s also (asiangrrlMN) insect. So the raping part is really superfluous. Isn’t the bigger loophole that you could claim that you have a blood relative in your uterus and therefore incect! ABORT!
I think the GOP needs to ban carrying your own baby. Mandatory surrogacy would be a hell of a jobs program.
Angry Black Lady
@Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason: awesome, and thank you. :)
Mark S.
I’m tempted to say this will obviously be stricken down as unconstitutional (as states aren’t allowed to overrule the Supreme Court’s ruling on viability), but Justice Kennedy might find that flighty women often come to regret aborting a fetus that was the product of rape.
Martin
@KG: New Testament isn’t foreign. Open one up – it’s in fucking english – and not the fancy one that talks about lorries and prams and shit.
sukabi
@Omnes Omnibus: well, in Indiana the aborted spite baby’s father can have the Dr. charged with murder… so if you want to get even with the spite baby’s father maybe you can convince the prosecutor that he raped you and then pressured you to have an abortion, and get him charged with murder/rape as well…
are we sure this isn’t some convoluted way for the assholes to incarcerate everyone for their prison labor farms?
asiangrrlMN
@Yutsano: Sorry that your back is still bothering you. Soup sounds good, though. Yum.
@MattR: Just like with sockulism before the new font made it look weird. Trouble is, I never remember it’s one of the words.
@Martin: You are ON FIRE tonight! Goes with the theme of the post.
Yutsano
@asiangrrlMN: A decent Olive Garden knock-off that works well pretty much every time. Plus it haz green stuff in it so it has to be good for you. Amirite?
asiangrrlMN
So, are we gonna have to start having pre-birth certificates as well? (Opening a whole ‘nother can of worms).
@Yutsano: Anything homemade is good for you. Truth.
Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)
@asiangrrlMN: Long form only.
Yutsano
@asiangrrlMN: I’m doubly screwed then. I was conceived in Hawai’i as well. I might as well declare residency on Ganymede and drop the pretense.
MattR
@asiangrrlMN: I feel much better about my meth use now
asiangrrlMN
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN): “Where is your pre-birth certificate?” doesn’t quite have the same ring to it, does it?
@Yutsano: Yep. No doubt about it. You’re a furriner. That’s OK. I’m a terrorist anchor baby, even though I was conceived and born in Minnesota because neither of my parents was a permanent resident at the time of my conception/gestation/delivery.
::huge dramatic sigh::
@MattR: Hey! What are you trying to say? I can quit any time! Crack is what, y’all.
piratedan
Dear Congress,
More jobs programs, less vaginal concern trolling.
Regards,
your employers, the American people
megamahan
“Tomorrow? Before I birth my half dozen spite babies? I’m going to abort one and then say it raped me.”
Holy shit, I just choked water up through my nose when I read that. Hilarious!
Yutsano
@piratedan:
Unless you’re a real Merikan fark off you dirty hippie.
Uncle Clarence Thomas
.
.
Fortunately, President Obama has never, and will never, compromise on a woman’s right to choose.
.
.
asiangrrlMN
@MattR: Hey! What are you trying to say? I can quit any time! Crack is what, y’all. (I meant to write whack, but I decided to leave it as is).
Yutsano
@asiangrrlMN: Sometimes the typo is just the creative part of ourselves emerging for a brilliant fleeting moment. And sometimes it’s a fat finger.
piratedan
@Yutsano: that’s Mister DFH to you, sir……(wishing I could use a Sidney Poitier voice, but alas, I’m a fat white guy and I fear something would be lost in translation)
MattR
@asiangrrlMN: In response to this.
Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)
@asiangrrlMN: In regards to something you said in the last abortion thread (Balloon Juice – Now with more Libya and abortion!), I’ve always found that an effective response to, “How would you feel if your parents had aborted you?” is to tell them that I’m chronically depressed and fundamentally unhappy with the world, so I’d be more than fine with it.
They don’t know how to respond to that.
Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)
@Uncle Clarence Thomas:
That took much longer than I expected. Too busy rubbing one out over the latest Greenwald update?
You should know by now to keep the lotion locked away until you see Anne Laurie make her early morning post.
asiangrrlMN
@MattR: D’oh! Got it. Heh.
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN): When I was chronically-depressed, my answer would have been, “Bring it.” In my head, anyway.
@Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again): Hi! Good to see ya.
I’m going to bed now. Night, all!
Angry Black Lady
@Uncle Clarence Thomas: you’re losing your edge, man. i expect more from you.
Joseph Nobles
You know, if it’s rape from the inside out, it’s incest from the inside out, too. Might as well punch both sides of the hate abortion card while you can.
Joseph Nobles
Dang, in moderation for a crack someone else already made. I’ve got to up my game.
Angry Black Lady
@Quicksand: totally. instead of anesthesia, the doctor uses mountain dew.
Yutsano
@Angry Black Lady:
Only if it’s throwback. Otherwise I’m outtie.
TheMightyTrowel
New meme: since dude are getting to wrap shackles around our lady parts, ladies should have the right to nominate any 5 dudes in their acquaintance for chemical castration, no questions asked.
sukabi
@TheMightyTrowel: why chemical castration… think more satisfaction would be obtained with a rusty butter knife and a hammer. The nominees wouldn’t be taken only from a woman’s circle of acquaintances, but would include prominent anti-choicers from around the country.
Fucen Pneumatic Fuck Wrench Tarmal
@Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN):
or, “um, wouldn’t i be in heaven?” yr rulz bytches!
Fucen Pneumatic Fuck Wrench Tarmal
@TheMightyTrowel:
how is that going to make the world a whiter place? i don’t think that works towards the ends the galtian superchiefs are aiming for.
unless you mean chemically castrating minorities. which they probably will introduce some time this summer.
Triassic Sands
Message to Reichsrepresentative Eric Turner:
I don’t want to disparage (the hell I don’t) anyone, you know, who has gone through the horrifying experience of becoming a Republican, but you guys are really, really lousy human beings. And as far as I know, no one has ever been forced to become a Republican, so I have to assume you were all really, really shitty human beings before you became Republicans.
Triassic Sands
As always, the Republicans play the game of “what if.” I mean, “what if” out of a
millionbillion cases of rape or incest there were one person who claimed rape (or incest) in order to get a free abortion. I mean, wouldn’t we be duty bound to punish the other 999,999,999 in order to prevent the one pretender from getting a free abortion? The answer is obvious. Of course we would be!!! After all, can anyone, even you bleeding hearts, say with absolute 100% certainty that no one under any circumstances will ever dishonestly claim to being raped. Of course you can’t!!! Therefore, the pressing NEED for this law.(Republican Rule NO.1: allowing a poor person to get anything free from the government is a worse offense than any other crime, real or imagined. Therefore, all laws must be written to guard against poverty stricken parasites. Exclusion: this rule does not — ever — apply to rich people, who are, by definition, not poor, and therefore, not parasites, and are thus entitled to whatever they can get from the government.)
joe from Lowell
OK, let’s say you’re a teabagger. Anti-soshlism, a washed-out version of Austrian economics, Repeal ObamaCare, cut the deficit – the whole nine yards. We all remember last year’s campaign.
What’s going through your head right now, as you watch the Republicans?
Triassic Sands
@joe from Lowell:
Nothing. I’m a teabagger.
joe from Lowell
@Triassic Sands: “Derp doop Kenyan derp derp.”
Cermet
Have these lying heaps of steaming shit ever heard of a police report and that it is a major crime to lie on one? As I posted before in the words of Palin and the asswipe thug candiate running for a seat in congress at the time of the attemped murder, bring on the cross-hairs …(to be read as suryor’s marks) and lock and load to win the seat (yes, for the niave here, thugs said these same sick things but never added the qualifiers or sarcasim – and as we know a demorat congresswoman was nearly murdered and part of herself was in fact murdered and is gone for good.)
These thugs go beyoud insane – Skin head A. Scalia the bat shit insane inferior Court Injustice would be so proud with his devine right of kings legal system belief (look it up if you don’t believe anyone is so insane as to believe that beyond the pale shit!)
Matt
@MattR:
I’d suggest the opposite for the Mars trip – follow the same model as the English in the 1600s and tell the teabaggers to STFU or GTFO.
lol
Abortion is a good example in American politics of the effectiveness of incrementalism.
They haven’t been able to make abortion illegal yet, but they’ve steadily reduced access and made the process onerous enough that abortion might as well be illegal for poor women. They’ve also been steadily moving public opinion.
Progressives should be taking notes and applying the lessons to the health care debate.
joe from Lowell
@lol: Good point.
Note how they don’t have any problem with loudly proclaiming their belief in a maximalist vision and the values behind it while they legislate in an incrementalist manner.
Eastriver
The die in a fire graphic is stupid and not needed. Please resort to cleverness. Much less karmic blowback.
debbie
By not disparaging women, he’s just disparaged them.
Silver Owl
Today’s conservative man is far more ignorant than worm feces.
rikryah
they tried to ‘redefine rape’, so does anything these misogynist clowns do surprise you, ABL?
doesn’t me.
SweetNostrils, fka Scuffletuffle
@Eastriver: But it’s hysterically funny and I would so buy one to hang on my wall, so there is that going for it.
Pongo
@MattR: Koch brothers would get to Mars first and set Scott Walker up as First Supreme Commander. Let’s face it, these asswipes have ruined the entire universe.
mclaren
Normally I’m not in favor of prison rape, but in this guy’s case I’d make an exception.
iPirate
How about a DNA registry for young men. Their salaries, if they have them, can be garnished to support every child they father.
SweetNostrils, fka Scuffletuffle
@iPirate: Can I just say that I love this suggestion. There has to be some way of making males just as accountable for their contributions to baby-making as we automatically make females. I would go further and say that after the first (ie, mistake, inadvertance,…) they either pony up the dough or have a vasectomy–sort of a one strike policy.
debbie
@iPirate:
I love this idea! It should be Planned Parenthood’s newest sex education program. All the personal responsibility and accountability that conservatives say they crave.
sukabi
How dare you be so uncivil as to say “uterus” on the house floor…
no really… Republican leadership in Florida scolded a Dem for saying “uterus”…