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You are here: Home / Humorous / Obama’s Birth Certificate Reveals the Truth! He’s Muslim as all Hell!

Obama’s Birth Certificate Reveals the Truth! He’s Muslim as all Hell!

by Imani Gandy (ABL)|  April 7, 20119:23 pm| 15 Comments

This post is in: Humorous, Assholes, General Stupidity

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Born in Kenyatown, USA Kenya.

Stuck’s comment —

Of course Obama was born in Kenya. I know this from my soldier of fortune days with the Foreign Legion in Africa, when one day whilst fighting for exploitation, I came across a a baby crib in a hut, with Little Baby Barack carved in the headpost. There were more words that said “future US presnit, and Weather Underground toddler corp”. Tacked to a post was Obama’s birth certificate from Kenya, and a cut out article from a Hawaiian newspaper of the arrival of baby Husseini, with stoopid white people scribbled on the margin.

True lie, swear to baby jeevus on a Koran.

— reminded me that Obama’s real live honest-to-goodness birth certificate was found MONTHS ago:

I hope Bruce Springsteen writes a song about this.

[I posted this at my place several months ago. Sadly, it is appropriate for a repost.]

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Reader Interactions

15Comments

  1. 1.

    Spaghetti Lee

    April 7, 2011 at 9:26 pm

    I hope Bruce Springsteen writes a song about this.

    (strumming guitar)

    Grab your old Koran,
    make yourself look brown,
    and meet me tonight down in Kenyatown.

  2. 2.

    MikeJ

    April 7, 2011 at 9:29 pm

    For the love of god, stop using h4 headers or change the damned style sheet.

  3. 3.

    cathyx

    April 7, 2011 at 9:32 pm

    The least you could have done was make his birth height longer than 20″. My daughter was 21″ and I think she’ll be about 5’8″ when she’s grown.

  4. 4.

    Warren Terra

    April 7, 2011 at 9:32 pm

    The Blackazoid Certificate is an oldie, but it’s a timeless classic.

    Re it being an oldie, it came out in August 2008. You really ought to link its original creator, which so far as I can tell you didn’t here or in your linked post. Firstly, because it’s the done thing, and secondly because their post says “must credit”, although that might be part of the joke.

  5. 5.

    El Cid

    April 7, 2011 at 9:34 pm

    Using my sharp knowledge of word choice and sentence length, I conclude that the carving on the crib was written by none other than Bill Ayers. And arranged by Saul Alinsky.

  6. 6.

    ruemara

    April 7, 2011 at 9:40 pm

    @MikeJ:

    You ever consider just skipping her posts, since it bothers you so damned much? Or is your bitching just part of the charm?

  7. 7.

    pjcamp

    April 7, 2011 at 9:43 pm

    Well you can tell THAT’S fake.

    Babies aren’t high. They’re long.

  8. 8.

    Corner Stone

    April 7, 2011 at 9:46 pm

    @ruemara:

    You ever consider just skipping her posts, since it bothers you so damned much?

    Why would anyone do that? They’re the best part of this godforsaken hole!

  9. 9.

    Steeplejack

    April 7, 2011 at 9:56 pm

    @Spaghetti Lee:

    Win! I think I can get you studio time for that on Monday.

  10. 10.

    General Stuck

    April 7, 2011 at 10:18 pm

    Blush awwe ABL :-)

  11. 11.

    Fucen Pneumatic Fuck Wrench Tarmal

    April 7, 2011 at 10:50 pm

    i was 8 years old and running with koran in my hand
    to mardrassa to pick up the religion of my old man
    i’d sit on his mat in that gig ole mosque and we’d cheer when
    KPU went down
    Kenyatta was fair he’d say, son take a good look around

    this is your hometown
    this is your home town

    this is your home town,…

  12. 12.

    joe from Lowell

    April 7, 2011 at 11:24 pm

    My favorite part:

    Mother’s Religion: EH

  13. 13.

    joe from Lowell

    April 7, 2011 at 11:25 pm

    @MikeJ: If this has something to do with all of ABL’s posts having a line of text in blue that looks like a link but isn’t…I concur.

    If not, a thousand pardons.

  14. 14.

    Bulworth

    April 8, 2011 at 6:29 am

    Of course Obama was born in Kenya. I know this from my soldier of fortune days with the Foreign Legion in Africa, when one day whilst fighting for exploitation, I came across a a baby crib in a hut, with Little Baby Barack carved in the headpost. There were more words that said “future US presnit, and Weather Underground toddler corp”. Tacked to a post was Obama’s birth certificate from Kenya, and a cut out article from a Hawaiian newspaper of the arrival of baby Husseini, with stoopid white people scribbled on the margin.

    This is a Very Serious and bracing claim that, even if completely idiotic and snarkful, moves the debate.

  15. 15.

    TheGemini

    April 16, 2011 at 3:46 pm

    I used to think so, but have since seen copies of the Hawaiian long-form from 1961 (they’re all over the internet) and nowhere on it does it specify anyone’s religion. I am now forced to conclude that the long-form simply doesn’t exist.

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