Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

There are more Russians standing up to Putin than Republicans.

No one could have predicted…

The real work of an opposition party is to oppose.

This has so much WTF written all over it that it is hard to comprehend.

SCOTUS: It’s not “bribery” unless it comes from the Bribery region of France. Otherwise, it’s merely “sparkling malfeasance”.

This must be what justice looks like, not vengeful, just peaceful exuberance.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

“Until such time as the world ends, we will act as though it intends to spin on.”

We still have time to mess this up!

Relentless negativity is not a sign that you are more realistic.

Beware of advice from anyone for whom Democrats are “they” and not “we.”

Republicans got rid of McCarthy. Democrats chose not to save him.

Insiders who complain to politico: please report to the white house office of shut the fuck up.

The worst democrat is better than the best republican.

The low info voters probably won’t even notice or remember by their next lap around the goldfish bowl.

Come on, man.

“Alexa, change the president.”

I might just take the rest of the day off and do even more nothing than usual.

Many life forms that would benefit from greater intelligence, sadly, do not have it.

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

This year has been the longest three days of putin’s life.

Consistently wrong since 2002

Trumpflation is an intolerable hardship for every American, and it’s Trump’s fault.

Welcome to day five of every-bit-as-bad-as-you-thought-it-would-be.

You are here: Home / Heckuva job, Colie

Heckuva job, Colie

by | 165 Comments

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John’s epic anti-seriousness rant earned him a mention in the second paragraph of K-thug today:

Last week, Mr. Ryan unveiled his budget proposal, and the initial reaction of much of the punditocracy was best summed up (sarcastically) by the blogger John Cole: “The plan is bold! It is serious! It took courage! It re-frames the debate! The ball is in Obama’s court! Very wonky! It is a game-changer! Did I mention it is serious?”

Reader Interactions

165Comments

  1. 1.

    erlking

    Does this mean that Balloon Juice will be moving to the Daily Beast?
    ‘Cause that would suck.

  6. 6.

    kwAwk

    Pretty cool. Perhaps we should nominate Cole to replace Herbert at the Times if that slot hasn’t already been taken.

    A write in campaign perhaps…

  11. 11.

    williamc

    um, and congrats of course JC, you’re big-time now! I, for one, would be lording this over my friends for months…

  12. 12.

    Petorado

    This can only mean one thing — Paul Krugman’s reading my comments! Off to think of something Pulitzer-worthy to say for the next post.

  13. 13.

    debit

    @Petorado: In these situations, I refer to the wisdom of Ralph Wiggum. Things like: “My cat’s breath smells like cat food.” You can’t go wrong with Wiggum.

    ETA: Also, too, Krugman’s reading my comments? OMG, I better get dressed!

  14. 14.

    Culture of Truth

    Apparently the GOP will pass Ryan’s plan through the House today. It’s so on right now.

  16. 16.

    mistermix

    Impressive — but isn’t that the same post that got a Moore Award? Does this mean that Krugman gets a Moore award by the transitive property of Moore Awards? How does that shit work?

  17. 17.

    Face

    Didn’t Cole get quite a bit of TDS love, too, when JS repeatedly use the phrase “skull fuck a kitten” on multiple broadcasts?

    Cole’s going nationwide. Radio deal in the works. Will it be “Cole and Colmes”, or will they oppos and try “Cole and Boortz…Quartz!” or something catchy like that?

  19. 19.

    David in NY

    Krugman himself can turn a pretty mean line:

    “[I]f there’s any magic in privatization, it’s the magical way it makes drug companies richer and taxpayers poorer.”

  21. 21.

    David in NY

    @kwAwk:

    Perhaps we should nominate Cole to replace Herbert at the Times if that slot hasn’t already been taken.

    I don’t think the Sulzbergers will want to hear about Tunch.

  22. 22.

    geg6

    *sniff* *sniff*

    And to think I knew him back in his naked mopping days.

    Good times. Good times.

    Now, I suppose, he’ll hire a maid to do his naked mopping.

    Wait, Cole hasn’t gotten any in how long? Maybe a naked mopping maid would be a good thing.

  25. 25.

    Rosalita

    @David in NY: Yes he can turn a line, this one cracked me up the other day:

    Good that he went after the Ryan plan — and good that he went after the cruelty of that plan. If you ask me, too many percentages. Oh, and whichever speechwriter came up with “win the future” should be sent to count yurts in Outer Mongolia.

  26. 26.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @Kane:

    Somewhere in the world Sully is pounding his keyboard.

    My schadenfreude moment of the day!

  27. 27.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @Bulworth:

    I guess we’ll all have to clean up our acts around here if K-thug is reading.

    Um. I won’t have an act then.

  32. 32.

    David in NY

    @Rosalita: Right. And I was thinking that the only thing Sarah Palin (it was she, I think) was ever right about was pointing out the usual meaning of WTF.

    Also, too, it painfully reminded me of Gerald Ford’s “WIN” buttons, for “Whip Inflation Now.” Which was pretty much his entire economic program on the subject.

  33. 33.

    Culture of Truth

    Jon Stewart can make fun all he wants, but calling tax cuts for billionaires ‘spending’ is excellent kung fu

  37. 37.

    Anya

    @John Cole: I always thought you’re mention in the New York Times would be in the form of news relating to espionage (possibly corporate).

  38. 38.

    Culture of Truth

    The new GOP message is that Barack Obama is a big meanine who hurt their widdle fee-fees

  39. 39.

    Rosalita

    @Bulworth:

    I guess we’ll all have to clean up our acts around here if K-thug is reading.

    my guess is he’d like the charm of the place just the way it is

  41. 41.

    gogol's wife

    @John Cole:

    I was so excited! Not so much for you, as for the New York Times. They’re waking up to the world around them. (I can dream, can’t I?)

  45. 45.

    Libby

    As Atrios said this morning when he linked to Krugman — Represent! You so deserved those props Mr. Cole. That was an epic post that pundits and historians should still be quoting centuries from now.

  47. 47.

    Bulworth

    The new GOP message is that Barack Obama is a big meanine who hurt their widdle fee-fees

    Break out the smelling salts and the fainting couches.

  48. 48.

    Violet

    @Paul in KY:
    My eyes! My eyes! I can’t un-see that image now. Thanks a lot.

    And please don’t move to the Daily Beast. Or anywhere else.

  50. 50.

    RossInDetroit

    @PeakVT:

    Krugman just destroys Ryan in that column.

    Ryan’s plan is a house of cards, half of them imaginary. A cursory glance and a breath would destroy it.

  51. 51.

    mr. whipple

    Apparently the GOP will pass Ryan’s plan through the House today. It’s so on right now.

    So awesome. Now we need to beat them like a rented mule.

  55. 55.

    Culture of Truth

    my guess is he’d like the charm of the place just the way it is

    “At first it was just once in a while, he would find himself cruising by late at night, attracted by their frank talk and lack of respect for the pundits; soon he fell in with the freaks, the “dirty hippies,” as they called themselves, but telling no one at his respectable day job of his time with the filthy-mouthed denizens of that other world…”

  56. 56.

    geg6

    @mr. whipple:

    It will be fascinating to see which of them still have a brain left and can see that train coming down the tracks right at ’em.

    And, no, that train is not a reference to any sort of Taggart/Roarke soft porn.

  59. 59.

    pk

    You made it John! All the hard work, the naked floor mopping, the cat pictures, the stumbles and the falls, finally paid off. Take a bow!

  60. 60.

    jibeaux

    I like to think that Krugman hangs out here regularly, maybe even as a commenter, maybe as someone we all know….

  61. 61.

    GregB

    Lamenting the day when the CNN octo-screen will include John Cole sitting next to Erick Erickson and Mark Halperin chuckling and towel snapping as they exchange beltway bon mots.

  65. 65.

    geg6

    @GregB:

    Laughing my ass off imagining Lamenting the day when the CNN octo-screen will include a giant picture of Tunch John Cole sitting next to Erick Erickson and Mark Halperin chuckling and towel snapping as they exchange beltway bon mots and tuna.

    Fixed.

  68. 68.

    chopper

    this is like the 3rd time k-thug has quoted that rant. i think someone has a crush on our blogmaster…

  70. 70.

    Napoleon

    @PeakVT:

    Remember the one he did on him in the last year called something like “Flim-Flam Man”? The title even tells you how hard he hit him.

  71. 71.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @niknik: If one person could create both of those personae, I would be very worried about that person’s psychological well-being.

  74. 74.

    Fe E

    Wow, and I can say “I knew him back in the day….”

    Remember that time he found out that regular dish soap in a dishwasher makes a truly epic anmount of suds?* Ah yes, those were the days….

    *Of course, I found out the same lesson about dish soap only a year or two before Mr. Cole–in exactly the same fashion, but my lesson was not blogged for posterity!

    sniff, (wipes away tear)

  76. 76.

    Gremcat

    Am I going crazy or was there a comment a few days ago with a link to another column where Paul Krugman linked to another of John’s rants?

  78. 78.

    Cain

    Krugman has great taste in blogs of course. BJ is one of the few blogs that’s actually progressive and doesn’t go into emo liberal territory.. and we have actually interesting front pagers.

    Still waiting on a real conservative for a headliner, Cole. :-)

  79. 79.

    mr. whipple

    If Krugman is reading this: please stop using the label ‘Progressive’.

    Thank you.

  86. 86.

    Amir_Khalid

    Meanwhile, Krugman’s columnar colleague David Bobo says what Obama needs to do is invite Paul Ryan over for a beer summit. Then they’d understand each other so much better. Obama would wind up seeing the wisdom in Ryan’s arguments, and producing a budget based on those arguments. Everyone would live happily ever after.

    I took a look at John Cole’s post that Krugman quoted. It’s worth looking at again, especially that delightful group portrait by Driftglass.

  91. 91.

    piratedan

    well with the AZ Lege passing their birther bill, will Cole now be allowed to blog without producing his long form birth certificate? Does he have a circumcision document handy? (sorry, its just that the idiocy running amok in my own state causes outbursts like this)

  93. 93.

    JCJ

    I know I have been reading this site too much. The other morning I woke up with “The math demands it!” and “It’s serious!” running through my head. Thanks DougJ, John, et al.

  96. 96.

    JPL

    What I want to know is how many copies of the NYTimes, John’s mother purchased? Can you even purchase the Times in WV? It might be worth a road trip to Pittsburgh just to buy a copy.

  98. 98.

    different church-lady

    Little by little, step by step… Cole crawlspaces the entire blogosphere….

  100. 100.

    salacious crumb

    now that K-Thug has legitimized Balloon-Juice, its time for John to make a video on how he bakes a cake (in honor of McMegans homage to her grandma’s backbreaking efforts to make one)

  101. 101.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Yutsano:

    Tarta cu fructe

    Ingrediente:
    6 oua,
    450 g. zahar,
    400 g. faina,
    14 linguri apa rece,
    esenta de rom,
    2 pliculete zahar vanilat,
    1 lingurita amoniac de sodiu,
    fructe (visine, cirese, caise, piersici, struguri, prune).

    Mod de preparare:
    Intr-un vas se spumeaza galbenusurile cu 250 g.zahar, se adauga treptat 7 linguri apa rece, esenta de rom si zaharul vanilat si la sfarsit faina.

    Intr-un alt vas se bat spuma albusurile cu 200 g.zahar si se adauga treptat 7 linguri apa rece si 1 lingurita amoniac de sodiu.

    In vasul cu galbenusurile se amesteca usor, de jos in sus, compozitia cu albusurile. Aluatul rezultat se toarna in tava de aragaz unsa cu margarina si tapetata cu faina. Deasupra se asaza in mod uniform fructele.

    Se coace la foc potrivit. Cand s-a racit se pudreaza cu zahar farin.

    ETA: Happy now, you demanding bastard?

  102. 102.

    scav

    Every good college town has student dives and professors often huddle in back corners with furtive pitchers of very cheap beer. I think the decor is safe for now.

  103. 103.

    scav

    @Omnes Omnibus: That it so eerie to be able to basically know the ingredients without, like, the actual process of reading them. Then I hit the linguri apa rece and I feel much better because I think it’s midway between a noodle and an eel.

  105. 105.

    Neal Peart

    What is the initiation prize for Ancient and Hermetic Order of the Shrill? Geddy, Alex and I would like to know. Thanks John and nice work.

  106. 106.

    Yutsano

    @Omnes Omnibus: I don’t know what scares me more: the fact that all I had to do was throw a minor hissy fit to get you to post that, or the fact that I can understand about 80% of it. The other 20% I’ll have to suss by other means, but I r occasionally clever like that. :)

  107. 107.

    comrade scott's agenda of rage

    When does Calamity Jane send you a congrats note?

    Oh right, nevermind.

  109. 109.

    J.

    @John Cole: What are the chances of that happening? Rather, I think you should try for the NYT trifecta and see if you can get Brooks and Friedman (or Dowd) to quote one of your posts.

  110. 110.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    From Google Trans:

    Ingredients:
    6 eggs
    450 g. sugar
    400g flour
    14 tablespoons cold water
    rum,
    2 sachets vanilla sugar,
    1 teaspoon ammonia, sodium (cream of tartar, I think)
    fruit (cherries, cherries, apricots, peaches, grapes, plums).

    Preparation:
    In a bowl with 250 g. sugar Cream yolks, gradually add 7 tablespoons cold water, rum and vanilla and finally the flour.

    In another bowl, beat egg whites with 200 g. sugar foam and gradually add 7 tablespoons cold water 1 teaspoon ammonia and sodium (Cream of tartar, I think).

    In mixing bowl with the yolks slightly, from bottom to top, with egg mixture. Hit batter is poured into the cooker tray greased with margarine and dusted with flour. (Batter should be the thickness of sour cream, per my m-i-l) Above sits the fruit evenly.

    Bake at medium heat (350 F). (use toothpick method to see if it is done) When it was cooled with powdered sugar Farina. (Dust with powdered sugar)

  112. 112.

    Lit3Bolt

    Now the only thing JC needs to do to cement his fame for all time is get that video (We know you have it, John) of Tunch’s exploding anal glands onto Tosh.0.

    Seriously, tho, time to trademark the vitty werbage. You don’t want someone else making millions from those “The Math Demands it!” and “Peak Wingnut” T-shirts do you?

  113. 113.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Yutsano: I went to a website and found one that looks similar to what we have at home. I would rather copy and paste than type.

  114. 114.

    Elizabelle

    I’m not surprised Krugman quoted John Cole.

    John’s one of the few who got it right on Paul Ryan’s wretched plan and a LOT of things, for months now.

    Props where due.

    Snark and pet pictures are fine, but having — yes — a moral sense and being able to cut through the obfuscation in a few well-argued paragraphs.

    Rare on these internets and rarer still in public political life.

  116. 116.

    Yutsano

    @Omnes Omnibus: I never fault a man for using the tools available to him. Now I’m inspired though. I might have to do some cooking this weekend if my back is up to it.

  117. 117.

    Paul in KY

    @Neal Peart: Remember the initiation rite in ‘Animal House’ at Sigma Asshole? It’s sorta like that.

    Which gives you an idea of why those people are in the positions they are.

  118. 118.

    jwb

    @jibeaux: Well, I doubt that he has time to be commenting here, given everything else he is doing, but I’d suspected he reads BJ more than occasionally because his blog very often seems to pick up our memes.

  119. 119.

    kindness

    I know running an independent blog is kinda nice. Not too many people to have to take orders from and all (whining readers don’t count under this one), but does the escalation of BJ’s presence in the world mean that John will have gobs of money thrown at him to have his name on a masthead at some MSM webzine next? I myself would love for John to have the money & all the assistants & what not, but I sure hopew it doesn’t come to that.

    Don’t let it go to your head John. Sally Quinn would think you a ragamuffin & never invite you back.

  120. 120.

    cyntax

    West coast late to the party, but congrats to Cole. By virtue of the transitive property, I assume this means that JC is shrill.

  121. 121.

    Sloegin

    Big fat congo-rats to Cole on the K-thug article. No worry about swelling that ego tho, that balloon doesn’t get any bigger.

  122. 122.

    slag

    The rant really was epic. And definitely deserves to be read from Ocean to Ocean. Preferably on a long train trip, if at all possible.

  124. 124.

    Josie

    @John Cole: John, I am so proud of you. It’s almost as if I were your mom. Be sure she sees all this. Maybe she will forgive you her dream.

  127. 127.

    eemom

    we’re movin on up
    (mooovin on up!)
    to the emmessemm side
    to a deee-luxe blogging gig
    behind the paywall skyyy

  128. 128.

    ktward

    Bonus for cheapskates poor people like me: the handy link means a quick read doesn’t come out of my NYT lunch money. How I love value-added perks.

  129. 129.

    Yutsano

    @eemom: Yeah, but I freely admit I’d shell out if JC went behind a paywall. It’s sort of like paying for teh Tunchinator’s tuna, a fitting and proper tribute to His Eminence.

  133. 133.

    geg6

    @JPL:

    It will run in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette tomorrow (they always run K-thug on Saturday). That way Cole can just run to the corner store tomorrow.

  134. 134.

    Stillwater

    Here’s a quote from the Krugman article

    And I don’t think there’s anything courageous about asking for sacrifice from those who can least afford it and don’t have any clout on Capitol Hill

    which got me athinkin. Given wage stagnation and increasing income (and wealth) disparities for the upper 10%, isn’t it demonstrated that the lower and middle classes have made real, quantifiable sacrifices, while the rich clearly haven’t?

    Haven’t we already done our part?

  135. 135.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Stillwater: What you fail to understand is that it is just not enough. If there is any danger that the people at the top of the income ladder will need to sacrifice anything, it is simply proof that everyone else must sacrifice more.

  136. 136.

    Fred

    “K-thug”…lol!

    I am wondering how many times Krugman will be able to cry wolf. He’s up to maybe 20 or 30 on Obama and still seems to be getting traction. The only reason he is pro-Obama this week is because he was anti-Obama last week. Rinse, repeat.

  138. 138.

    The Bobs

    Paul Ryan, defending his plan to Krugman, “Not intended to be a factual statement.”

  139. 139.

    Elizabelle

    From Krugman blogpost last week, “Serious Miscalculations” from Krugman’s The Conscience of a Liberal:

    Last week was the rush to declare the Ryan plan “serious” on the part of people who either didn’t look at the numbers or didn’t know how to look at the numbers. By the end of the week many of them were trying to climb down without quite admitting that they had been snookered.

    http://krugman.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/04/14/serious-miscalculations/

  141. 141.

    birthmarker

    Congrats, JC. First you were a kingmaker, now you’re a king!

    @Fe E: Ha! A day we all have to go through. Kinda like dyeing that first load of laundry pink. After running soapy water all over his apartment, my son thought the dishwasher didn’t work properly and never tried to use it again!

  142. 142.

    JCT

    @Amir_Khalid:

    Krugman’s columnar colleague David Bobo says what Obama needs to do is invite Paul Ryan over for a beer summit. Then they’d understand each other so much better. Obama would wind up seeing the wisdom in Ryan’s arguments, and producing a budget based on those arguments. Everyone would live happily ever after.

    Hmmmm. I read that and my first thought was that the “best” outcome would be Obama smashing idiot Bobo over the head with his beer mug.

    And Kudos to John — that reference by Krugman this morning started my day off right for once!

  143. 143.

    Stillwater

    @Omnes Omnibus: Yes. What you’re talking about is the more obscure corollary of The Trickle Down Theory of Prosperity: The Trickle Up Theory of Sacrifice.

  144. 144.

    dogwood

    Oh Cole, you sneaky bastard. You changed sides for the perks. As you become rich and famous I sure hope you have coattails. I’d be happy to underblog, overblog, or just change the litter box. I believe in you John, and I really need a new set of tires and am strapped for cash right now.

  145. 145.

    4jkb4ia

    I saw Sargent link to that–and I exclaimed, “No! Frigging! Way!”

    Now that John is a celebrity he may have to give more serious consideration to what to do about the trolls.

  146. 146.

    BrianM

    Cole will not have really hit the big time until Sarah Proud and Tall spills what she knows.

  147. 147.

    PTirebiter

    @Culture of Truth: I think so too. and after all, if you pay zero taxes and get money back, it is spending. And Congrats to Mr. Cole, undoubtedly one of the coolest things that can happen to a man over forty.

  149. 149.

    kdaug

    @Just Some Fuckhead:

    It won’t be long before Bill Maher is trying to get John on Real Time.

    Only if they’ll show him shadow and disguise his voice. Except his beautiful feet. They can show those. But he’ll have to do the interview barefoot.

  150. 150.

    kdaug

    @J.:

    Rather, I think you should try for the NYT trifecta and see if you can get Brooks and Friedman (or Dowd) to quote one of your posts.

    George Will.

  151. 151.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @dogwood:

    You changed sides for the perks.

    It is my understanding he changed sides because he has more personalities than Sybil.

  153. 153.

    licensed to kill time

    Commentariat bows to Cole

    {{{We’re not worthy! We’re not worthy!}}}

    heh heh… Of COURSE we are!

    Kudos, Mr.C Quite deserved, you rock, party on!

  155. 155.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @4jkb4ia:

    Now that someone else checked that exchange I don’t feel so bad.

    Balloon Juice, come for the Cole, stay for the Drama.

  158. 158.

    Wolfdaughter

    @piratedan:

    My state, too. Sigh. Somebody yesterday, I believe, exempted us BJers from the banishment Arizona deserves (well, the guv and the Lege anyway).

    The fact that the law considers circumcision or a baptismal certificate acceptable alternatives shows just how fundamentally unserious the Repubs in our Lege are. Hello? Many churches don’t even practice infant baptism. Neither circumcision nor baptism is any guarantee that the person was born on U.S. of A. soil. In fact, I guess this means that an Israeli is now a U.S. citizen! Yet the birth certificate that Hawaii provides upon request and a few bucks is unacceptable.

    And I guess I’m not a citizen, because I have no idea where my “long form” birth cert is, but I have one from the State of Kentucky, Jefferson County, which looks really really a lot like the one Obama released. Also, too, I would have a wee problem (so to speak) with providing a certificate of circumcision.

    Oh, and congrats to John for being quoted by the Krugster.

  160. 160.

    John - A Motley Moose

    Congratulations, John. This blog, and you personally, are frequently quoted on Sully’s site. Now a plug in the NY Times. More and more pundits will be checking out the site to see if there is anything they can steal quote. To misquote our eminent VP, “This is a big freakin’ deal.”

  161. 161.

    Q

    Great to see the mention Mr. Cole, congrats!
    Very soon now there will be some new trolls coming to visit…
    wait for it!

  163. 163.

    Turgidson

    Steve Benen at the Washington Monthly just gave a shout-out to KThug’s column and Cole in his daily roundup.

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