In the sacred presence of the latex solar beef:
Welcome to the big leagues, Trump, you douchebag.
Alumni weekend. I will hurt in the morning. Tuaca and scotch are strange bedfellows. Tequila, also, too.
Reader Interactions
119Comments
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Elizabelle
“My. …. Fellow Americans.”
Just Some Fuckhead
Yeah, me too.
Evolved Deep Southerner
Oh, shit. John, no. Dude, you will regret typing another word.
Mako
You sound fat.
SIA
Remember when President Obama killed that fly during an interview? That’s what he did to the Donald tonight. LOL.
MikeJ
In honor of Cole.
MikeJ
@Mako: Is a mako a mud shark? Is this post title a coded message for you to meet at the Edgewater in the Led Zeppelin suite?
Mako
@Mako:
Sorry, kneejerk reaction. I say that to anyone who drunkenly stumbles into the room quoting Mothers lyrics.
Yutsano
@Elizabelle: The mahalo makes that line even bettah.
Also: he looks the best I’ve seen him in a long time.
Veritas78
The President was kind to Trump, compared to Seth Meyers. This is excruciatingly, cringe-worthy funny:
Just Some Fuckhead
@Yutsano: Do you ever sleep?
Steeplejack
@Just Some Fuckhead:
Dude, he’s a government employee. It’s not like he works or anything.
Arclite
Gotta admit, the prez was hilarious and devastating. I wonder who helps him come up with this stuff.
Update: OMG, the 2Pac & Biggie line…
robertdsc-PowerBook
Stomp that stupid fucker’s head flat, Mr. President. Well done!
Yutsano
@Just Some Fuckhead: Theoretically. I took a two hour nap this afternoon. Plus my schedule is tailored to late nights as well. I just look like I keep vampire hours.
@Steeplejack:
There’s a Masshole I talked to on Friday who wishes that were true, as I got him into an agreement after basically tearing his financial situation apart. He was cursing me under his breath by the end, but weaseling and lying to me isn’t a smart idea.
Mako
@MikeJ:
sing along with me in your best falsetto- I am Bwana Dik
edit: nevermind, there is some soft-corn porn movie on the television thing, gotta go.
Uriel
Wait- I didn’t catch the televised version, but was that part with the Hulk Hogan theme and the rapid zooming in and out on the COB actually part of the presentation? ‘Cause if it was, that’s all kinds of awesome… Even better than the Lion King clip.
Steeplejack
Okay, I stayed up an extra half-hour to watch this video and read the thread, sustained by Australian rules football on ESPN2 in the background. But since the game doesn’t involve either of my favorite teams, St. Kilda or Footscray (not a veterinary condition), I am disappointed. And so off to bed.
@MikeJ:
Awesome!
freelancer
Go get ‘cher fuckin shinebox, Donnie!
Elizabelle
Still laughing at his takedown of Trump’s schtick. On Celebrity Apprentice.
“These are the kind of decisions that would keep me up at night. Well handled, sir. Well handled.”
Just Some Fuckhead
I got one cigarette left and then I’m hitting the sack. That’s like 5 minutes in real earth time. Ask me anything you ever wanted to know right now because in 5 minutes the most amazing buzz I ever sustained is gonna be zzzzs.
Arclite
I intended to watch the first minute and turn it off, but ended up watching the whole thing. That was solid.
Yutsano
@Arclite: It’s kind of a gestalt thing. You really can’t appreciate the full awesomeness unless you witness the whole shebang.
Nellcote
Here’s Seth Meyers awesome set at the WHCD:
http://bcove.me/tn2w2owx
Arclite
@Yutsano: Can I ask, what is the origin/etymology of “Yutsano”?
Nellcote
@Uriel:
yes! It was the Prez intro.
Arclite
@Nellcote: Thanks for that link. That was pretty good. Esp the NYTimes/Huffpo joke.
JGabriel
But wait! By attacking Trump, doesn’t Obama raise him up to his level and make it all the more likely that Trump will be the GOP Presidential Nominee? Isn’t that something we should be concerned …
Oh, right.
.
Yutsano
@Arclite: Brain detritus. I think I came up with the name for a science fiction story a long time ago. It’s been around for a really long time and it tends to be a unique nom de Internet. So I kept it for that reason and have used it ever since.
Mako
@Nellcote:
interesting. I stopped watching the video twice at about the submarine. Thought it was a joke. I guess it is a glossy new reality television world.
Mako
Oh. It’s a celebrity roast. Needs more Gilbert Gotfried.
Amir_Khalid
Adoi. That must have hurt. I’m wondering, did the Washington Post collude in setting The Donald up, or did they tee him up for the White House by simple carelessness?
Arclite
@JGabriel: The destruction of Trump tonight was analogous to when John Stewart appeared on Crossfire. Here’s to hoping it has the same effect.
gwangung
Um. Wow.
Had a couple sketches about Trump in an upcoming show. Not any more; there’s no point–there’s no way a comic could top that. That was a nasty an evisceration as any comic could do to a public figure.
And it was so masterful that it could ignore one of the prime rules of comedy: always punch upwards.
Yutsano
@Arclite: I saw the look on teh Donald’s face. He’s in. He will take this all personally and now will try his damndest to destroy Obama. Trump does NOT take insults well.
Uriel
@Just Some Fuckhead:
Oooh! I got one! Does spending hour after hour impotently spitting out irrelevant, ad hominem non-sequiturs ever become, you know, tiring, in an existential sense? Like, say, angrily beating off under the covers pretending the homecoming queen has even the vaguest notion of who you are while inhaling the heady scent of your own pent-up nervous farts? Do you ever find yourself going “why do I even bother pretending this is pleasurable or important, let alone leading anywhere besides a disappointing mess?”
I mean, I’m just curi- oh wait. Damint, I guess I missed the deadline.
JGabriel
Actually, I thought Trump managed to keep up his game face during Obama’s routine.
Seth Meyer should probably hire bodyguards, though. Trump looked daggers-from-his-eyers murderous during Meyer’s act.
.
Uriel
@Nellcote: That is excellent. In so many ways.
Valdivia
@Yutsano:
Meaning he will run now to spite Obama?
Arclite
@Yutsano: Yeah, I took great joy in the sour scowl on that prick’s face. He was hammered, and rightfully so.
JGabriel
Arclite:
Heh. Yes, probably. Though the joke was that even if it made Trump more likely to be the nominee, that would work to the Democrats benefit too.
.
Yutsano
@Valdivia: I think so. It’s the only real leverage Trump has on Obama. Plus I honestly think between his ego and the massive attention he’s getting if he doesn’t run the Republicans will have too difficult a time recovering. I never conceived a worse candidate than Palin that the Republicans could possibly put up. They happily proved me wrong.
@Arclite: He was better than hammered. He was humiliated. He’ll take it personally and lash out. I’ll have my popcorn at the ready.
ABL
I’m in the midst of some alumni shenanigans myself.
L’chaim!
Loved Obama, but of course I did — we Blacks are wired that way.
ABL
Also, too, Jagermeister is evil. Like, “Satan’s vagina” evil.
Tell your friends.
JGabriel
Yutsano:
l;kasjqwer,m
asjkng;lqwer
(Oops. Ignore that. Damned laughter spasms.)
.
Valdivia
@Yutsano:
If he is that thin skinned it’s not going to go well for him! He is the typical inflated ego bully who can only function in a bubble of fawning. He can’t take a dose of reality.
What I don’t get is why all reports by journalists seem to mention how painful it was to be near Trump’s humiliation. I would have had total glee.
JGabriel
@Valdivia:
Any New Yorker can tell you, Trump’s skin is even thinner than his hair.
.
M. Bouffant
Finally, lyrics for adults in a title!
Do not try to “kick it to start” tomorrow, however.
Valdivia
So I’m up with utterly deadly back pain after falling on the side of the pool while training for my triathlon. This athletic lifestyle is gonna kill me.
JGabriel
@Valdivia:
Just because someone asked for and deserves humiliation, doesn’t mean you want to be there to watch the expression on their face when it happens. I don’t necessarily share the journalists reaction in this instance, but it’s understandable and hard to fault them for it.
.
Valdivia
@JGabriel:
Lol. Yep, having lived there I know that, seems the Village is not in on the joke.
JGabriel
Washington Post:
Someone must have written joke that for Boehner. I refuse to believe Boehner could come up with something that witty on his own.
Frankly, the idea that Boehner could even deliver the line without breaking into tears is pushing the boundary of belief.
.
Valdivia
@JGabriel:
Agreed. Or the WaPo pimping Boehnor cause that’s how they roll!
Pope Bandar bin Turtle
“No Things Considered” FTW!
MonkeyBoy
@John Cole
@ABL:
John, are you turning into a Girly Man? I always figured that sweet perfumed drinks like Tuaca were designed to appeal to women so they can claim they weren’t aware of the high alcohol content.
Maybe this explains how Southern Comfort has destroyed Southern manhood.
middlewest
I know it’s lame to be attracted to a politician, but god, I love when he acts brainy butch.
No one of Importance
@JGabriel:
He managed a sort of a sour smirk until Myers made that crack about the Miss USA pageant and then Trump just stopped pretending to be a good sport.
The contrast between him and the President when Myers was zinging him was…striking.
@middlewest:
Hell yes. I don’t even smoke and I needed a cigarette.
Valdivia
@No one of Importance:
Was Meyers very rough on Obama?
Console
When Meyers said Obama looked like Louis Gossett, Sr., I damn near fell out my chair
No one of Importance
@Valdivia:
This line: “I’ll tell you who could beat you: 2008 Barack Obama. You would have loved him.” was pretty near the bone, and yet Obama just laughed and nodded. Same with the remarks about his appearance. To a vain man – which Obama plainly is not – these would have burned.
Put it this way – if Meyers had done the same thing to Dubya, Dubya would have been talking to Rove about how fast they could lock Meyers up for some ‘enhanced interrogation techniques’>
Valdivia
@No one of Importance:
Thanks for the reply. Yes one thing the other side doesn’t get about Obama is his amazing comfort in who he is, and cause of that an amazing ability to laugh at himself.
Villago Delenda Est
Yeah, given how notoriously thin-skinned The Donald is, nothing good will come out of this.
Except a crushing landslide for Barack Obama in 2012.
bemused
Awesome. I loved it. Pointing out to Fox the birth video was a joke was hysterically funny. Saying to the press that getting the truth out is journalism at it’s best was a great rebuke, not that they will pay much attention to that.
I caught a shot of the back of Trump’s head. I can’t imagine what kind of glue keeps those strands of straw in place. After a shower, that hair must hang down to his adam’s apple.
JPL
Trump and entourage were greeted with jeers and left with smirks. He’ll attack again but it will take him a few days to regroup. Has NBC fired him yet?
djesno
+>3?
wkwillis
Your site shows me the first page correctly, but then the second page has the text extend under the ads or other pictures on the right, and far past the end of the screen. The FAQ section loads, but no text.
Is there a location for me to contact the webmaster? My computer runs XP and is five years old.
roshan
Politico sucks, here is the Youtube link for the Meyers bit. He diced up Trump pretty bad. The Trump part starts somewhere around the 14 min mark.
kMc
Cue Bobo decrying the nature of our political discourse in 3…..2…..1……
roshan
“The deficit is a serious issue. That’s why Paul Ryan couldn’t attend tonight’s dinner. There is no room for laughter in his budget. PAUSE”
That’s gotta burn.
Yevgraf (fka Michael)
Jesus, I thought I drank too much devil water (Mt Gay Eclipse), but everybody on this board apparently guzzled a lot more than I did and it looks like a bar brawl in the light of morning.
Cheryl from Maryland
@bemused:Meyers’ calling out of the media was especially tremendous. But I agree it will fly right over their hair sprayed heads.
Caz
Actually, the funniest part of the post is your comment, “Welcome to the big leagues, you douchebag.” You’re all growns up, what a sophisiticated and witty zinger!
I find it hard to understand how the bloggers on this site think that insults and name-calling is most appropriate and effective type of discourse.
If you’d actually post substantive and meritorious stuff, you wouldn’t be quite the laughing stock of the blogosphere as you are now.
Troll out!
amk
@SIA: Nailed it.
EconWatcher
@roshan:
I actually didn’t understand that one, but overall Obama was great.
Jason
@Caz: And yet, the discourse here is light-years in advance of what we see played out on national TV.
Town
Something tells me that if Donald Chump was ethering Obama on stage and Obama looked uncomfortable and/or pissed, the media would have had no problem being near Obama to see his reactions.
Caravelle
I loved the Trump destruction like everyone else and the clips were hilarious – especially the “I am an American” one xD
But then he started talking about journalism and that just brought me down.
amk
@Caz: You have COD. Go see a doctor.
And take your taebagging crowd with you.
Rommie
It must be the early morning brain fuzz, but I initially read the post as “Tunch and scotch are strange bedfellows” and started to wonder what you could possibly mean by that.
Scott P.
Don’t want to sit through all the chaff. Can someone tell me what happened?
BOSS BITCH
@Valdivia:
not in my opinion. He didn’t say anything that Obama hasn’t heard before. Obama makes similar cracks about his looks and the frustration of his supporters and the pace of change at DNC functions.
BOSS BITCH
@roshan:
that was devastating and true.
amk
@Scott P.: Watch the vids. Many are floating around.
Cat Lady
@Scott P.:
This happened.
Svensker
Heh, indeedy.
Ron
@No one of Importance: Eh, ISTR that Dubya got zinged and poked fun at himself at the WHCD as well. He was a disastrous president, but I don’t think he was on the level of Trump with ego and lack of humor.
jinxtigr
He’s pretty sure Disney has the long form version XD
Even I cringed a little when Obama referred to Trump’s accomplishments- and the room LAUGHED. Oh my God, was that ruthless, it was Colbert-level. And he called Trump ‘sir’! The cojones of that performance was off the charts…
dww44
@wkwillis:
There is an ongoing issue with Internet Explorer that causes the 2nd page (as when accessing the comments)to ignore the right margin, load across one’s screen and become unreadable. Also happens on occasion when I click on a link and come back to finish a comment and/or an article.
My solution is to refresh the page. Do it 3 or 4 times if necessary. Works most times;not always. When it doesn’t I access in Firefox, although the typeface and readability are not as good on my eyes which is why I always try first from my preferred browser.
Tim, Interrupted
Everyone at this revolting beltway circle jerk, including Obama, is a disgusting, arrogant, fascist pig.
Tim, Interrupted
Also, too, furthermore, and additionally: I see Cole is back to alcohol abuse as a means of escaping the voices.
Unresolved guilt will do that.
Marlene
@dww44:
I had the same problem but then I switched to IE9 and the problem went away. Don’t know if this will work for you but it did for me.
amk
@Tim, Interrupted: Tch tch, tch.
Too much of whoopass and butthurt last night ?
amk
@dww44: You can set font size and type in Firefox via Tools/Options/Content
Xantar
@Tim, Interrupted:
Fool!
Tim, Interrupted
@Xantar:
Tool!
Villago Delenda Est
Poor Caz and Tim, Interupted are butt hurt.
My heart is bleeding buttermilk for them.
licensed to kill time
@dww44:
There is a great addon for Firefox called NoSquint that lets you set font size for each site you visit.
Another addon is Theme Font & Size Changer which lets you change the fonts in Firefox itself. I use both, they are quite simple to use.
That’s what’s so great about Firefox, how you can tweak it for your personal needs. IMHO ;)
Grumpy Code Monkey
“The President’s Speech”. The last thing you can accuse any of these people of would be lack of self-awareness.
Meyer’s line about it being down to the President and Biden “looking for the toner” was pretty ruthless IMO.
From the stone faces on the Fox types after the “birth video”, you can tell that they really didn’t appreciate the dig. Hannity will respond by claiming that using “The Lion King” shows that Obama believes people should bow down before him and worship him like a king or god or something. And he’ll claim they used it without Disney’s permission. And how dare the President use a children’s cartoon to score political points. Und so weiter.
But it was totally worth it.
Brachiator
@Yutsano:
No worry. Trump never wins, and always ends up looking like more of a stooge when he tries to escalate jokes and criticism into a grudge match. David Letterman even called Trump out on his racism recently.
Trump’s brashness often flirts with self destruction. Even though there is a strange mood in this country, that applauds the ravings of someone like Trump or Charlie Sheen, even The Donald may find that he can go too far.
Emma
Good almighty. I just got around to looking at that video. That intro is worth it all by itself. I think — as much as I disagree with him in so many things — that the man has brass ones. Big, big, brass ones.
Citizen_X
Damn, that intro video–I’d challenge Colbert to come up with something that over-the-top.
Oh, and I’ve said here, previously, that Bond-era Sean Connery is the only man who can look good in a bow tie? Well, so can Obama.
Ash Can
Thank you, Caz and Tim Interrupted for showing us what the “mark” in question looks like when we say “that’s going to leave a mark.”
tkogrumpy
Latex solar beef?
Michael57
Dana Milbank the day after: “Maybe it would have been fun to be there after all.”
amk
@licensed to kill time: Thanks for that ff addon. It worked great.
licensed to kill time
@amk:
You are quite welcome! This is a full service blog, doncha know.
amk
@licensed to kill time: :)
So cole can get me some original russian vodka and some hawt russian gals to go with it ? How about some french wine with french dames ?
Jay C
@No one of Importance:
The big difference between President Obama and his immediate predecessor? Dubya often didn’t take himself seriously, either: but unlike Obama, one never got the feeling that there ever was any “serious” behind it at all. And I think Bush knew it, too.
@Amir_Khalid:
The Washington Post has long since turned its back on the liberal editorial stances that once earned it the nick of “Pravda on the Potomac” – for decades they’ve been trying to straddle an ideological line, avoiding overt “partisanship” while assiduously pimping every neocon shibboleth around. I suppose they felt they were earning themselves some sort of brownie points on the Right by bringing Donald Trump along to (what they must have suspected would be) his public humiliation.
Did.
Not.
Work.
Out.
Very.
Well.
Yutsano
@Jay C:
Oh I dunno. I think his abject humiliation last night went off just fine. Of course whoever the idiot was who assured Trump he would not be a subject last night is jobless this morning, but dem’s da breaks.
licensed to kill time
@amk: No harm in askin’, but he’ll more likely try to fob off a dog named Rosie on ya.
amk
@licensed to kill time: LOL
Fucen Pneumatic Fuck Wrench Tarmal
@ABL:
the problem with “satan’s vagina” is that by the time jagermeister is usually proposed, one would look at satan’s vagina, shrug and say, better than nothing.
Jay C
@Yutsano:
Well, yeah: didn’t work out very well for Trump or the WaPo; for the rest of us, and the country as whole:
WIN!!!111!1
Tim, Interrupted
@Villago Delenda Est:
Please let me know what it is you believe me to be “butt hurt” about?
Thank you.
Irving
@Jay C: I’m not sure. The more I think about it, the more I suspect that the Washington Post had precisely this sort of outcome in mind. They may well have set up this entire scenario. I’m put in mind of college professors who invite politically unpopular speakers to a college, with a great hue and cry by the student body… and then when the guest speaker arrives, the professors filet and debone the guests in a debate. Trump said he was “blindsided” by the jokes. Who could have led him to believe that?
Brachiator
@Irving:
I don’t think that they are that smart. The dinner is a big deal to the social snobs in the Beltway. Many of these people love Trump, party with him and kiss his butt to get discounts when they stay at Trump properties. They probably thought it was a huge coup to be able to sit him at their table.
And they will find a way to make it up to him. Trump will no doubt show up at some fundraiser in the near future, and all will be forgiven. In the end, these miserable parasites always take care of their own.
AAA Bonds
Ahh, yeah, can’t get enough of that clip.
grandpajohn
Trumps presence was not a significant factor,You know that these monologues were already written before Donald was even invited.
However his presence did increase the humor and hilarity of the jokes, and if he believed that after weeks of
trying to make himself the sole focus of the media with his insulting racist comments, that he himself would not be in for a bashing himself, then he is much stupider than I thought he was
AxelFoley
@Tim, Interrupted:
You and Caz need to get a room.