I didn’t catch it at first in the previous post, but you alert readers did:
Temple said that “if the House Armed Services Committee and the Pentagon slow down on injecting open homosexuality and females into forward combat roles,” tea partiers might be able to put up with their new Republican House voting to ensure American government services are paid for with more borrowed cash.
DADT was repealed just a few months back and already they have weaponized it and are injecting our troops! Wait till a stable airborne version is available, and we start doing cropduster flyovers at NASCAR events- we’ll turn entire counties in no time. No large event will be safe.
Well, Lady Gaga and Bieber concerts are probably safe. No use wasting the stuff.
Seriously, though- what is wrong with these people? Always with the “injecting” and “ramming it down our throats” and the like.
Zandar
INJECTO-RAMMING ACTION!
piratedan
finally, a quartermaster corp that will have some tasteful choices when it comes to issueing camo
stuckinred
Fruit loops in the chow line!
Tim in SF
um, John? I’ve been to a NASCAR event. I would rather not have all those flagging beerbellies join the gay ranks. And the world does not need more gay republicans – the ones we have are trouble enough.
JonF
So, if we criminalize gayness, will we get single payer federally?
Litlebritdifrnt
Betty Cracker over at Rumproast said it so much better than I ever could
http://www.rumproast.com/index.php/site/comments/dont_be_a_drag_just_be_a_queen/
There is something not quite right about these dressing up as Colonials dudes.
pragmatism
we could just end combat operations. win-win?
Cat Lady
Teatardness should be in the DSM. It’s clearly a mental disorder characterized by humorlessness, ahistoricity, projection, irony deficiency and utter lack of self awareness.
Just Some Fuckhead
@Tim in SF: I dunno, that burly bearded guy wearing nothing but overalls and a Jeff Gordon license plate at Richmond International Speedway would make a pretty hot bear.
Stefan
Hey, I want some credit for that! I think I was the one who caught that odd phrasing…
Warren Terra
@pragmatism:
Surely the anti-homophobe position is to maximize combat operations, so our proud ghey-injected forces can prove their mettle?
Dongo
Something very hot about that “injecting open homosexuality” language.
I’ll take one buttfull, please.
Just Some Fuckhead
Sheesh, God is going to make us lose in Afghanistan if we inject teh gay. Although it might not look too differently from what we got going now.
dmsilev
Also sort of interesting that he went with “females” instead of “women” like a normal human would.
Also, too, by the standard double negative mechanism, I assume that he’s OK with lesbians in combat roles.
pragmatism
@Warren Terra: you know who had a heck of an army? those spartans and romans. and what happened during those non-farm animal involved lonely forward combat operations nights in each other’s loving arms was of no importance.
Joe Beese
Do you guys have any idea how many times a day you use the word “butthurt”?
Anyway, since God only knows when I’ll have another compliment for Obama, let it be noted that today’s “moats with alligators” line was Gold.
Baud
I guess you’d call a weaponized gay the “Gay Bomb.” :)
dmsilev
Worth pointing out that reality has lapped our snark:
Southern Beale
Oh yes they injected open homosexuality and females by thrusting forward into the rear flanks which had been left exposed, slowly cutting their routes of withdrawal ….
gah. I’m just not good at this. You get the, er, gist ….
Jay in Oregon
So a guy wearing stockings and a wig is worried about Teh Ghey?
I’ll defer my response to The Onion, thanks…
General Stuck
Jeebus Cole, part of the vaunted American Experience is to experience being the laughingstock of the civilized world on a regular basis. Today is gay day, or maybe gay month, where wingnuts fulfill their solemn duty to embarrass us all to tears. I just wish they would turn their efforts toward a cure for stupidity. But that seems somehow mutually exclusive, in some way
Just Some Fuckhead
@Joe Beese:
Your belief has given Obama the strength to live another day. Thank you Joe Beese.
fhtagn
@Southern Beale:
Thrusting forward into the enemy’s open rear areas, they seized much booty….
Roger Moore
@pragmatism:
I think the example you’re supposed to use is the Sacred Band of Thebes. Of course they’re not quite as well known, but any city that managed to muscle Athens and Sparta out of the way for top city in Greece deserves some attention.
fhtagn
@Roger Moore:
“Perish the man who says they did or bore anything base!”
Evolved Deep Southerner
You missed that the first time, Cole? Damn, son. That was the best part. Did you just see Mr. Cosplay and post it without actually reading it? The things the guy said were much funnier than his costume. And that’s saying something.
piratedan
@fhtagn: at first there was some resistance, eventually yielding and surrendering to the inevitable…..
pragmatism
@Roger Moore: duly noted. in addition to teh gay bomb, will there be a handheld weapon? a gayzer perhaps. can we get some sharks with frickin gayzer beams???
Stefan
Also sort of interesting that he went with “females” instead of “women” like a normal human would.
Whenever I hear someone use “females” instead of “women”, I’ve got a pretty good clue what kind of person I’m dealing with.
Female is an adjective, not a noun.
b-psycho
The U.S.’s psychologist population must be downright sick by now of their Freudy-Sense tingling every time a winger opens their mouth.
cbear
Praise the Lord and Pass the
AmmunitionKY-Jelly.Roger Moore
@b-psycho:
Where would you like your internet delivered, sir?
geg6
These assholes have more sexual issues than anyone outside the Vatican. Always with the ramming and the injecting and the shoving. And their fear and loathing of women is off the charts. The use of the word “female” is so dehumanizing that I fear for any girl children they may have. Of course, they may not have any girl children or any children at all because all that fear of women, their homoerotic terminology, and penchant for flashy costumes screams so closeted he doesn’t know he’s gay to me. It’s very sad that they have to take out their sexual pathologies on the rest of us. I wish they’d all just head to the Castro and let it all hang out. The country and the world would be a much better place if they did.
burnspbesq
The United States Marine Corps is in your base, rogering your doodz.
I guess the Corps’ new motto will be “Semper Hard.”
cbear
Damn the
torpedoesdildos, full speed ahead!fhtagn
@burnspbesq:
Judging by the weekend warrior William Temple, I think it’s going to be Semper Fee-fee.
JGabriel
@Southern Beale:
How could we permit this? They came in our back door!
(See, it’s simple!)
.
Cam
Don’t forget “bending over and grabbing our ankles,” a favorite of Rush and Hot Air commenters. They love their homosexual metaphors even more than they hate teh gays.
Roger Moore
Weaponizing teh ghey is just a response to the Teabaggers weaponizing teh stupid.
different church-lady
Yeah, sure, you’re all laughing now. But this guy is a single demand that Obama show him something from being the new front runner for the Republican nomination.
fhtagn
http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2011/may/10/aussie-rules-dangerous-hairstyle
Just think what the Teabaggers are saving us from!
(Those who don’t know about Aussie Rules might like to know that it is a brutal, athletic sport that makes the NFL look like pat-a-cake).
Just Some Fuckhead
@Roger Moore: You can’t fight stupid with gay, only tacky. You need to figure out how to weaponize ridicule to fight stupid.
b-psycho
@different church-lady:
…nah, too easy. Had to be intentional.
different church-lady
@b-psycho: {sigh} Nobody appreciates a straight man anymore…
Xecky Gilchrist
@Joe Beese: Do you guys have any idea how many times a day you use the word “butthurt”?
Yeah, and whenever you discuss pets you keep mentioning cats and dogs.
Srsly, Joe – we’re discussing conservatives.
Emma
different church-lady: I’ve always thought their obsession with Obama ‘ramming things’ in indelicate locations has a tinge of ‘oooooh show me what you’ve got, big guy’ to it.
Or as a friend of mine puts it, those guys are so deep in the closet their zip code is in Narnia.
Roger Moore
@Emma:
That’s a wardrobe, thank you very much, which is not at all the same thing as a closet.
MikeJ
@Xecky Gilchrist:
I always assumed it came form being spanked in a punishing, non sexual way.
Emma
Roger Moore: They can both be made to hold pretty costumes…
Xecky Gilchrist
@MikeJ: I’m not sure what it means beyond being whiny and stricken and being unable to shut up about it, and if you can discuss conservatives without needing a shorthand for that concept, you’re doing something wrong.
Martin
They cancelled the gay weaponization plan back in the 90s. Get with the program Cole.
TooManyPaulWs
It’s all about the Precious Bodily Fluids.
beergoggles
It’s just the projection of feelings that republicans have. They only resent having stuff shoved down their throats because they would rather have it injected.
fhtagn
@Roger Moore:
People who believe in fictional lions named Ass-slam… well, I’ll say no more.
Uloborus
Yeah, it’s as if they have some *personal* reason to care about whether men get to have sex with other men. Like it’s not abstract and they’re already so twisted up on the subject that reason can’t be applied. I mean, they care a lot. A LOT. They act like accepting homosexuality would make their entire life a lie.
I guess there’s no explanation!
Cain
@pragmatism:
In fact, they fucked for Rome’s glory. And the raping and pillaging ? Not so much.. after all they had those hot nights in tents with nothing but the rattle of armor.. *kink* *kink* rhythmic.. just like that.. *kink* *kink* *kink*
Cain
@MikeJ:
I thought it was because someone gave them a solid kick in the ass.
SFAW
Fixed for more obviousness and cruditude.
Gonna use that one a lot. Probably deserves its own tag, too. (For use re: Rush “Anal Poisoning” Limbaugh and his Band of Merry “Men”. Ah, hell, any of the flaming homophobes, really.)
Mnemosyne
@MikeJ:
I usually think of “butthurt” as being like a toddler who just fell on his well-padded butt but screams and cries about it anyway.
Ozymandias, King of Ants
This guy’s just asking for an Invisible Handjob.
Darkrose
@Emma: When Obama showed his long form (hee!) I would have paid real money for him to say, “‘Scuse me while I whip this out…”
BattleCat
I wonder if gay people make better soldiers than straight people. Because, like, what if we could harness all that anger and rage at being considered a second-class citizen and mold it into elite fighting battalions?
Angry people fight the best, they’re all up in your grill and punching you and shit without provocation. Like, when a female woman and a male man are gay, and they’ve been crapped on most of their lives, can they turn that into some kind of “let me jump across three roof-tops just so I can toss you over the ledge of the forth” ninja wizardy?
That’d be kind of cool. And then we could send them over to Iran to give them the heebie jeebies or whatever. What IS their problem, anyway?
Yutsano
@burnspbesq:
Tease. :)
@Just Some Fuckhead:
And sequins. The proprieties have to be followed here.
SFAW
Who knew that Liberace would turn out to be a war hero (or some such)?
Michael D.
Because, as we all know, gay men love nothing more than getting off to 16 year old boys.
AMIRITE?? !!
b-psycho
@Michael D.: I would figure Bieber concerts would be a waste of Gay Bombs because no men would be there anyway. That is, unless it works both ways and your goal is to create an army of raging-hormonal teenage lesbians.
Jado
I always remember what Bobcat Goldthwait said about homophobes
“I hate you cause you’re gay…and you’re a fag…and you’re kinda cute…”
sneezy
Awesome title. New rotating tagline?
hunter
Seriously, though- what is wrong with these people? Always with the “injecting” and “ramming it down our throats” and the like.
Tony Perkins likes “pounding”, as in “If the administration keeps pounding its agenda through the military. . . .”