Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Whatever happens next week, the fight doesn’t end.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires republicans to act in good faith.

I’d like to think you all would remain faithful to me if i ever tried to have some of you killed.

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

Fuck the extremist election deniers. What’s money for if not for keeping them out of office?

The willow is too close to the house.

We still have time to mess this up!

Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in morse code.

I’ve spoken to my cat about this, but it doesn’t seem to do any good.

Fuck these fucking interesting times.

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

You can’t attract Republican voters. You can only out organize them.

Republicans seem to think life begins at the candlelight dinner the night before.

Republican obstruction dressed up as bipartisanship. Again.

Optimism opens the door to great things.

It’s time for the GOP to dust off that post-2012 autopsy, completely ignore it, and light the party on fire again.

If you tweet it in all caps, that makes it true!

A democracy can’t function when people can’t distinguish facts from lies.

Peak wingnut was a lie.

Balloon Juice has never been a refuge for the linguistically delicate.

So it was an October Surprise A Day, like an Advent calendar but for crime.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

Tick tock motherfuckers!

This really is a full service blog.

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Reader Interactions

33Comments

  1. 1.

    Villago Delenda Est

    As I mentioned one of the previous thematic threads, 2012 is not a problem, I’ve been assured, because the numerology involved is not biblically based.

    It’s therefore bunk.

  5. 5.

    AxelFoley

    I can just see the thread title here when 2012 comes around: The Final Countdown.

    Along with the obligatory Europe YouTube vid.

  8. 8.

    West of the Cascades

    As a Christian, the imminent rapture makes me kind of nervous. For one thing, if there really is a rapture, heaven seems like it would be kind of boring if it’s filled with people like Sarah Palin (maybe “boring” isn’t the word so much as “essentially equivalent to eternal damnation but with fluffy clouds”). Also, it would really suck to learn that the socialist hippie Jesus I believe in actually IS the right-wing thug much of the GOP seems to believe in. Even worse to learn that while burning in a pit of hot molten lava being poked with pitchforks.

    This is another reason I hope I’m right that most of the Bible is metaphorical. On the other hand, getting raptured (or boiled in a pit) would save me from working the rest of the weekend for a Monday deadline. There’s always a silver lining.

  10. 10.

    Wag

    All I know for sure about the Rapture is that come Sunday morning, Ralph Reed is going to be pissed that Jimmy Carter got raptured and Ralph didn’t

    I wrote this on the last post, but it fits here too

  12. 12.

    joel hanes

    @West of the Cascades:

    If the Rapture actually comes, and if the words of Jesus can be trusted, there will be a great many fervent “Christians” enduring the tribulation — including all the famous “Christians”, the prominent “Christians”, the wealthy “Christians”, celebrity “Christians”, powerful “Christians” — and Heaven will be a delightful village populated by unassuming people that no one’s ever heard of — people who quietly loved the world and asked no more of life than to live and love and make it better.

  13. 13.

    Hunter Gathers

    I don’t worry ’bout no stupid rapture.
    Like most of America’s Cultural Elite, I worship Pan the Goat God.

  15. 15.

    Roger Moore

    @Hunter Gathers:

    Like most of America’s Cultural Elite, I worship Pan the Goat God.

    Is that what Mickey Kaus is calling it now? And are you sure that America’s elite doesn’t worship Mammon? It seems closer to their observed behavior.

  16. 16.

    Spaghetti Lee

    I can picture Quetzalocotl bitching out Jehovah as we speak: “No fair, you big meanie! You said I could destroy the world! You promised!“

  17. 17.

    RossInDetroit

    Remember when Y2K was going to be the end of civilization? Well, we won’t be able to code our way out of this one.

  18. 18.

    Comrade Colette Collaboratrice

    @Wag: Fan-fucking-tastic. Thanks for the link. I’m just going to play that continuously until the world ends, at least in New Zealand. I may take a break to make popcorn.

    No enough people are going to get raptured in my neighborhood (heavily ethnic in ways unlikely to be evangelical Christian) to make looting a real sport, so I need some entertainment. On the other hand, if Glen Tomkins in the previous thread is correct about the Rapture being a 12-tribes, Jews-only affair, I could be outta here (hey, somebody’s got to represent Ephraim and half of Manasseh).

  20. 20.

    RossInDetroit

    In my Jewish neighborhood the only change the Rapture would bring is the Witnesses with their Watchtower handouts missing from my doorstep on Sunday morning. Lovely people, and I’m sure deserving of a heavenly reward. But I like it here, thanks.

  21. 21.

    fasteddie9318

    @RossInDetroit:

    But I like it here, thanks.

    Oh yeah? See how much you’ll like it after all the fundamentalist Christian loudmouth busybodies are gone! Bet you’ll see things differently then, won’t you?

  23. 23.

    R-Jud

    20 minutes to 6 pm in Suva, Fiji (I believe the Rapture happens at 6 pm local time, wherever you are).

    What should I make for last breakfast, guys? Cornbread or cheese scones?

  25. 25.

    Barb (formerly Gex)

    @Wag: Awwwww. I would miss Jimmy. But he seems worthy.

    I’d almost rather the jerk Christians be right and get called up, and leave the heathens like me with Christians like Jimmy.

  27. 27.

    Steeplejack

    @R-Jud:

    Cheese scones. You probably can’t do proper (Southern) cornbread. (If only because you probably can’t get Martha White cornmeal in England.)

  30. 30.

    Dream On

    I was promised a Rapture of a biblical nature. Why is humanity raining on my parade?

  33. 33.

    R-Jud

    @Steeplejack: Good point. We went with the cheese scones. Fabulous.

    @Roger Moore: Yeah, but who wants a rushed last supper? With the Rapture at 6, we wouldn’t have time to wash up before Jesus returns even if we sat down to dinner at 5 PM.

Comments are closed.