My personal drinking game: drink whenever you hear one of the candidates say something that makes you say to yourself, “I need a drink”.
2.
lamh34
I was hoping one of the blogs I read would be liveblogging or at the very least updating their blog readers on the debate.
Especially since as I said in the previous thread: “I would rather scrape out my fallopian tubes and ovaries with a rusty, dull swiss army knife (too graphic???) than watch this debate. ”
I’m grateful that other BJer’s will watch it so I don’t have to….
3.
Sentient Puddle
My drinking game: Drink heavily.
Same effect, less effort.
4.
lamh34
Drinking game
“Obama-care” 1 shot or swig
“Romney-care” double shots or swig
“Obaromney-care” (or whateveh it was Pawlenety tried to come up with on Fox Sunday) – drink the who bottle.
5.
dmsilev
Starts right now. Streams on cnn.com, if you want to inflict pain on yourself.
6.
Anne Laurie
Beat ya to it, Cole… again!
(For the record).
7.
dmsilev
@lamh34: There are a few liveblogs going that I know of. Daily Kos is doing one, as is TPM, and I’m sure there are others.
8.
lamh34
Okay,
So I’ve been at work all day, so I missed Obama’s “pivot” to job speech in NC. So need I ask which story got more coverage “Weiner’s gym pics” or Obama’s jobs speech.
9.
Alex S.
Haha… Santorum: I have 7 children.
Bachmann: I have 5 children and 23 foster children.
Ron Paul: I delivered thousands of babies.
10.
dmsilev
Drinking game: One drink per “cut taxes”, two for “cut capital gains to zero”. Schedule liver transplant for tomorrow.
11.
lamh34
@dmsilev: thx. I “monitor” DKOS, but I don’t frequent it much anymore. So I probably won’t read that liveblog.
I like my liveblogging with alot of snark…so BJ is probably the best place…lol
12.
Keith G
The Christian Science Monitor reports that President Obama has met with his jobs council. They offered him proposals for how to add one million positions to the US job market without help from Congress.
Those may include policies to attract more investment from foreign firms, upgrade US infrastructure, welcome high-skill immigrants, and reform US tax and regulatory policies.
So…which high-skill immigrants do we need to bring in to help shrink our domestic unemployment?
2. If Herman Cain mentions “Herman Cain,” eat a slice of pizza.
3. When Michele Bachmann refers to anything along the lines of “principles our nation was founded on,” take a shot.
4. If Newt Gingrich modifies anything with the words “shockingly” or “fundamentally,” take two shots.
5. If Herman Cain defers policy decisions to his “experts” drink as much as your nearest “expert” tells you to.
6. If Mitt Romney brings up health care on his own, drink 1 gallon of milk.
7. Every time the word “Mormon” is mentioned, drink a venti.
8. When Rick Santorum talks about defeating Democrats in the ’90s, drink 2 Yuengling.
9. If Santorum tells you to google “Rick Santorum,” take 2 shots.
10. Whenever Ron Paul references the constitution or says “it’s not in the constitution,” take a drink.
11. When Tim Pawlenty says he won’t be “entertainer in chief” or any variation thereof, down a beer. (If he says, “Obamneycare,” down 2 tequila shooters.)
12. Whenever Michele Bachmann makes a mistake with basic history, drink 1 Pabst Blue Ribbon.
13. When Herman Cain discusses Muslims, drink as much as you like, with the understanding that Sharia law will be applied for as long as he is speaking.
14. When Newt Gingrich says “Callista,” ask your wife if it’s ok for you to take a drink. (If you are single and watching at a pub, kiss a waitress.)
15. Every time Ronald Reagan is mentioned, take a drink.
In other words, we may actually see the word “RINO” materialize behind a candidate tonight if his/her answer is unsatisfactory. The idea of what might show up onscreen when Gingrich is speaking is alone enough to make me faint with anticipation. Greatest debate ever?
16.
dmsilev
Ouch. John King actually asks a semi-hostile question: “Tim Pawlenty, since your tax plan is just Bush 2.0, where were the jobs under Bush’s plan”. Pawlenty: 5%, 5%, 5%.
my drinking game, i am going to blast anal c. songs in lieu of republicans speachifying in memory of seth putnam. later when its rebroadcast, right now its hockey go canucks!
22.
dmsilev
Ron Paul: Bring us back to the 1930s! Yay Great Depressions!
23.
McGeorge Bundy
I’ve never been so frightened and so entertained at the same time.
24.
pattonbt
@lamh34: Your friend and my friend Wonkette is doing the honors this evening.
25.
abo gato
Made it through about 4 minutes…..then knocked back the tequila shot I had, went and got another and changed the channel over to Lawrence. Only because I didn’t like what was on the Food channel. Fuck these fucking fuckers.
26.
Litlebritdifrnt
One drink for each instance of “lower taxes” “small business” “deregulation” and “entrepenuers” you will be clinically dead by 10pm. Bonus points if you can also drink to each instance of “strong national defense” without falling into a coma before 9:30.
27.
JPL
@Alex S.: Is that true? Maybe I do have to stream the debate.
And can you really call it a “debate” with that many “sides”? I presume it is every candidate for him- or herself.
30.
Kirby
I take a drink whenever someone says something reasonable and constructive that I agree with. Of course, I’m the designated driver.
31.
srv
Larry Summers suddenly decides austerity isn’t a good idear after all during a recession/depression.
And Austan Goolsbee can’t do any more damage except at the University of Chicago, like that would be any loss. Maybe he can get an office in Milton’s institute there.
32.
Calouste
CNN did a poll before this debate. The 7 candidates on stage collected a whole 59% of the votes between them. Most of the rest went to Palin and Rudy G.
33.
dmsilev
Blah blah blah. Obamacare is a job killer. Blah blah blah.
Someone hit the talking-point-o-matic, it’s stuck again.
34.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
Bachmann just actually said “As Presnit of the Nunited States”.
My schadenfreude meter is in danger of exploding with delight.
41.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
@dmsilev: “Mr President, why didn’t you call me when you modeled your plan on MA, I would have disavowed responsibility for having done it right away!”
42.
dmsilev
Long-time GOP activist: “Convince me that you’re not crazy”
Weiner to resign. It was inevitable.
Finally, our long national hotdog is over.
If your political scandal lasts for more than 4 weeks, seek immediate medical attention.
47.
RandyH
I think John King ought to do his job and question the patriotism of everyone not wearing a flag pin.
48.
JimPortlandOR
If we all had to take a big swig for every lie told tonight by the “candidates”, everyone would be drunk on their ass by the end. I caught 5 min. just now, and couldn’t handle it, so left. Michelle lied about the health care law, big-time, and noone even raised an eyebrow. Then Romney pledged to end Obamacare on his first day in office (not bothering to worry about the Congress passing repeal).
She once was a moderate conservative with the ability to appeal to Democrats and the charisma to energize Republicans. Not since Reagan has there been as gifted a politician as her and, because she is an attractive woman with a powerful personal story, you could easily argue she exceeded even the Gipper in overall political potential. I also believe her to be smarter than Reagan.
It’s pure comedy gold.
51.
Anya
Better than a drinking game, every time someone talks about family values, have sex with someone from the opposite sex or hire a hooker in honor of the family values party.
52.
Reality Check
Just wait until Rick Perry gets in!
53.
PhoenixRising
My God, Michelle Bachman cleans up well for a trip to town…
That is scary.
54.
dmsilev
Michelle Bachman: If I wish really hard, Obama will lose.
55.
lamh34
meme on twitter…T-Paw backing off criticism of Romneycare.
GOP strategist mostly saying you coined “Obamneycare” you should own it.
I think T-Paw is running for VP to Romney’s President.
and I see Bachmann is in.
56.
JPL
The tea party is made up of democrats…yeah right asshole..Koch is a former dem. I can’t believe that I am streaming this shit.
57.
ken
obama is going to destroy these people.
58.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
Bachmann: “The Tea Party is a delicate blend of pekoe, oolong, and lunatics”
Oh this was quite an image:
“We need all of us on a three-legged stool”.
No, sorry seeing this collection just standing on a stage is already surreal enough, thanks.
Pawlenty’s decision to back off “ObomneyCare” attack will be THE process story of post-debate commentators; Nick Ayers and company cringing?
60.
dmsilev
Question: How do you bring manufacturing jobs back to the US?
Ron Paul: The Federal Reserve is evil.
61.
JPL
hahaha..how do you plan to increase manufacturing jobs..can’t wait until romney answers this one..hahahahaha
62.
Reality Check
Shut the fuck up Ron Paul. Crazy asshole coot.
GOOOOLD!
63.
jane from hell
@dmsilev:
“If your political scandal lasts for more than 4 weeks, seek immediate medicalmedia> attention.”
new improved
+3
64.
dmsilev
Pawlenty: “I’m not for being stupid”
(Looks at GOP) Slow pitch, right down the center.
65.
Martin
My drinking game idea:
Take a drink for every hand raised in support of something disproven prior to the Civil War. Two drinks for anything disproven prior to the American Revolution.
Alas, this thing is on 3 hours before the sun sets and I got shit to do, so the drinking will have to wait. Someone keep a tally of what I owe and I’ll set it right after I’m done with the power tools.
66.
Reality Check
Right on, Tim. Take a chainsaw to business regulations and watch the economy roar.
67.
dmsilev
Bachman: Kill the EPA. Because smog and acid rain create jobs.
Santorum didn’t really just say “trickle down” did he?
72.
JPL
nice call out to rush..time to go spit up…
73.
dmsilev
Santorum: I have no sense of humor. Even a lame one.
74.
lamh34
reading the tweets on twitter, it seems like Bachmann is stealing the show from T-Paw. The consensus is that Bachmann’s performance so far means Palin for President is DOA.
75.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
@lamh34: No she really did, or “all of us as a three-legged stool” maybe? Went by fast but “on” is how I heard it.
It just dawned on me: This really is their field, at this point, isn’t it. Wow are they doomed.
76.
McGeorge Bundy
Conan or Leno? Somebody shoot me in the fucking face.
But the evident disgust on Santorum’s face when he answered that question was hilarious.
77.
jane from hell
Thank you, King- what this debate was lacking was a little levity! Wait. I mean brevity.
78.
Martin
@Reality Check: Maybe we can repeat that subprime mortgage economic expansion! Woo!
79.
Martin
@EL: Well, Santorum has been known to trickle down…
On right-to-work, why doesn’t anyone ever ask, “Why shouldn’t I have the right to make a contract with my employer saying that they’ll only work with a union?” Or, “Why should states like Wisconsin be allowed to break contracts with their employees?”
The sanctity of contracts is one of the pillars of libertarianism — it’s fundamental to owning property. The confluence of libertarians and right-to-work shows how hollow CATO, Heritage, etc are when they claim ideological purity.
82.
dmsilev
@lamh34: I can’t wait until Palin hears that. She’ll react oh-so-amusingly to the idea that there’s a new queen bee around.
83.
Alex S.
How are they going to fill the 5-6 debates they probably have to do when they all say the same three or four things regardless of the question asked?
84.
Anya
By my count, this stage has parented between 40-50 kids and delivered 4,000 babies. And 28 million bad pizzas.
from my boyfriend Ezra Klein’s twitter.
85.
JPL
Can we send the definition of a debate to King? x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x. WTF.. So will Romney win because he does not have to answer any questions…
86.
ChrisNYC
Blitzer said that the Obama campaign is “scared” of Rick Perry. Ha! Yeah, right.
87.
Zach
@dmsilev: Yup; if Bachmann keeps killing this, Palin’s going to be in the next debate for sure.
88.
dmsilev
Ron Paul: I am a libertarian. Therefore, please don’t take me seriously.
89.
Martin
@dmsilev: Well, it does – by killing people. Maybe the GOP should consider just cutting to the chase: everyone with a social security number that ends with 4 – get in the oven! Instant 10 million new jobs!
90.
lamh34
Wow. People saying Pawlenty’s refusing to re-state his crack against Romeny to his face is “cowardly”.
T-Paw not coming off good in this. I expect all the punditry to call T-Paw on his “wussiness”.
If you gonna talk shit about someone then ya gotta be willing to say it to their face.
91.
dmsilev
@Alex S.: By saying the same thing 10 or 20 times over. And then filling the remaining time by chanting “Reagan” over and over again.
92.
gbear
@lamh34: My prediction is that Pawlenty pulls out a gun and shoots Bachmann 47 times before the debate ends.
93.
Alex S.
They should ask the question whether there needs to be any government at all? Democracy is sort of socialist anyway.
Pawlenty…the unions created the bubble and the mess so they have to live on the street…oh well
111.
Alex S.
Newt Gingrich is the least conservative guy on this stage, ha!
112.
Steeplejack
Jeez, I cannot drink enough to watch more than a few seconds of the debate at a time. Just flipped over to hear Newt talking about how if we had taken all the money NASA has received since we landed on the moon and given it to the private sector in incentives instead, we would now have a permanent station on the moon and three or four “delivery vehicles,” and Natalie Portman would be representing us in the galactic Senate.*
* Okay, I made that last one up.
ETA: Bruins are en fuego. Up 3-0 in the first period.
113.
Zach
There needs to be a question for every candidate to answer: You all want to shrink government. Can you briefly describe what the government *should* do?
114.
RandyH
Pawlenty’s not going to make many friends in the Republican money establishment. “End Crony Capiitalism?” “FAIR Trade?” WTF?
115.
C.J.
Man, Ron Paul’s use of actual economic words makes the rest of them look like usual politicians. Too bad his ideas are wacky.
116.
Gravenstone
Alternating between Cubs-Brewers and Top Gear. Not enough money in the cosmos to entice me to watch the Republican circus train that will be the debate. Still, carry on y’all, the snarky summaries are quite appreciated.
117.
dmsilev
The inside of Ron Paul’s head is a tape loop with about 15 seconds of voice on it. Repeating over and over and over again.
@RandyH: Have you paid any attention to the rhetoric at Tea Party rallies? The crony capitalists flip on the holotelevision, lean back in their truffle-encrusted lazy boys, and lie back and laugh at protests against TARP whilst lighting cigars with thousand-dollar bills.
The capital class rallied to end Huckabee’s run in 2008 because he seemed like a genuine threat in this respect. Other than Ron Paul and maybe Herman Cain, none of these folks are a problem.
128.
ChrisNYC
It is interesting that all the voters are asking, “What would you do?” And the answer is always, “NOTHING!” Not a good takeaway.
129.
dmsilev
Ooh, it’s the “who hates Medicare the most” round!
130.
JPL
Is it just me or is this debate stupid? Paul is now talking about medicare but talking about covering children wtf..
For some reason I figure the folks at Wonkette are smashed.
Cain: I’m appalled that Democrats used scare tactics about health rationing that we used to use also and that I’m about to do again in the next breath.
“Where are the president’s ideas?” In his fucking budget, you empty suit.
145.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
@dmsilev: Yes but while trying to pretend that he actually agrees with Ryan and wasn’t aiming the criticism at him, at the same time. He was talking so fast trying to rationalize the two he was a blur.
146.
BDR
“If the president would be honest about things, as I lie about how much ‘Obamacare’ costs…”
Hoping this somehow takes a cue from pro wrestling and all of a sudden music starts playing, John King yells “BAH GAWD, THAT’S RICK PERRY’S MUSIC!” and Rick Perry runs out on stage and starts powerbombing people through their lecterns. Pretty much the only thing that could salvage this at this point.
149.
JPL
I finally had to turn them off and put on hockey..Is it really 4/0?
edit..the bruins might be dominating in the first quarter..understatement..huh
150.
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
anyone mention reagan?
151.
licensed to kill time
@BDR: It’s something to look forward to in our Golden Years, the Maybeness.
152.
dmsilev
And now the “more Christian than thou” round. Should be amusing to hear Romney’s answer.
153.
Ash Can
@dmsilev: When Newt Fucking Gingrich is coming off as the reasonable one in the room, you know you’re fucked.
154.
Zach
There needs to be a reality show set in Dearborn, MI.
155.
BDR
Ah, Pawlenty and Santorum giving their perspective on how the founders really didn’t care about mingling of church and state.
If you listen closely, you can hear Jefferson, Madison, and Adams spinning in their fucking graves.
156.
BDR
I love Newt saying terrorists will lie when they take the oath, so we’ve got to ask people to tell the truth before they work in the White House — do you hate America? Brilliant.
157.
srv
It’s controversial to ask cabinet members to be loyal to America? Who are all these Jihadi’s trying to get on Newt’s cabinet?
The folks Romney’s talking about didn’t come to American because of religious tolerance. They largely came to America to establish one-religion, puritanical communities operating by religious law. A bunch more traveled around trying to coerce other people into doing the same thing.
161.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
The Republican Party has just come out against hiring anyone who tells you in the interview that you’re his enemy and that he’s committed to your destruction.
Man, that’s going to change things.
162.
JPL
I gave it my best and wanted to hear about their policies and their ideas to move our country forward but I failed. There was only so much who do you like better questions I could take. Personally I could care less who they like more. I’m sure that someone better than me will post earth shattering news about moving the economy.
163.
dmsilev
OK, the gay-hating round.
164.
4tehlulz
Has anyone asked the vital “Ginger or Mary Ann” question yet?
John King is too fucking dumb to run a lemonade stand.
166.
BDR
“The best possible way to raise a child is with a mother and a father, and I was raised by a single mother.” — Bachmann
Seems pretty cruel to blame your single mother for why you turned out so batshit crazy, Michelle.
167.
jwb
@ChrisNYC: When you are putting your hope in a known secessionist, you know you’re in trouble.
168.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
Ron Paul wants a dictionary-based system of law. Hmmm, intriguing. Especially in a few years when “Santorum” appears in the new editions.
169.
BDR
Did Bachmann just say she supported a federal constitutional amendment outlawing gay marriage but that didn’t mean she would go into the states and overrule their laws in support of gay marriage?
Can someone explain to her how the constitution applies to the states?
170.
BDR
“As commander in chief, I would want to consult with the commander in chief.” Brilliant.
That does it; tomorrow I’m applying to Sharia law school. I hear you can lie on the application.
And Romney’s the Smiler from “Transmetropolitan.” Also.
172.
PhoenixRising
Shorter John King: “Although our viewers don’t give a damn about these issues, my contract requires me to beat up on gay people because this is a Republican debate…so let’s take time away from the issues voters ARE concerned with, to stake out our positions on the rim of the endless lake of fire Corporal Sissyboy and his wedding planner RuPaul need to be pushed into…”
173.
dmsilev
Q to Santorum: Is Romney a pro-life flip-flopper?
174.
BDR
I really wouldn’t use the phrase “taking the bullets” when talking about the abortion issue. Sorta reminds people just which side of the debate has been shooting people on the other side.
Bachmann. She was trying to say as president she’d consult with commanders on the ground about DADT, but called them “the commanders in chief.”
178.
jane from hell
No plants in *this* audience.
179.
Cacti
Does Ron Paul support abolishing the Air Force.
The constitution doesn’t actually contain the words “Air Force” and if they didn’t need flying machines in 1776, then neither do we.
180.
Zach
@jk: Seriously? This is way better run than any of the 2008 GOP debates even though at least 3 of the candidates are total jokes. He presses with some pretty good follow-ups. Way weaker than he could be, but the audience would turn on him if he was any harsher.
181.
ppcli
@UncertaintyVicePrincipal: Whew. Good thing I got tenure before the first year of the Santorum régime. I would have been tripped up by that clever ruse.
182.
Citizen_X
Ron Paul: “the border between Iraq and Afghanistan.” WTF?
Pawlenty wants to get around birthright citizenship by appointing conservative judges … who presumably wouldn’t be bound by the clear fucking text of the 14th Amendment?
190.
Martin
@Citizen_X: If you’re willing to deny the existence of 73 million people, you could consider Iran to be a very wide border.
191.
bago
It’s a fair bet that us wonketeers are smashed. My god, it’s full of booze.
192.
Third Eye Open
@bjacques: Who is Spider Jerusalem since Hunter is makin’ dirt?
193.
Leadpipe
Less government. More border security. Let’s privatize the borders with firms hired by Republican state governors.
194.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
When Newt proposes nuance and shades of gray this crowd hears nothing. It’s out of the frequency range entirely, they just hear a sort of buzzing until a red meat talking point appears.
The audience would turn on him if he was any harsher.
I think a single debate with a live audience is appropriate and that’s it. When candidates have 1 fucking minute to answer a question, too much time is lost by these assholes applauding like trained seals after every answer.
King’s “this or that” question is the hallmark of an airhead not a journalist.
Pawlenty wants to get around birthright citizenship by appointing conservative judges … who presumably wouldn’t be bound by the clear fucking text of the 14th Amendment?
It falls right in line with Scalia’s pronouncement that the word “person” in the 14th amendment doesn’t mean women.
Romney’s pretty good at this. The gut reaction would be to say eminent domain’s always bad, but that newsman (who’s asked almost all of the good questions and phrased them in a way that didn’t allow them to dodge) was so ready to hit back with the Big Dig if he’d said the wrong thing. I doubt he prepped for that question, but maybe he was ready for it since it was a bigger topic in the ’08 debates when Kelo/NewLondon was more relevant.
Hey I just realized, no one said 911 yet. Until now. Wow. 11 years, but they finally stopped burping it up as punctuation.
If they had only allowed cross-dressing….
edit: Spoke too soon, just hadn’t gotten to the 911 round yet I guess.
204.
Martin
@Cacti: If Congress had intended whores, they would have said whores. -Scalia
205.
dmsilev
Ooh, Bachman with the extra style points for a gratuitous anti-France swipe.
206.
Citizen_X
So, Bachmann thinks we shouldn’t be in Libya, but we should be leading the war?
207.
jane from hell
LEAD from behind! That way you can *both* watch The Daily Show!
208.
licensed to kill time
Newt dropped the first 9/11 wordbomb!
209.
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
dead girl or live boy?
210.
Zach
Wow. What the hell ever happened to supporting the troops? I more or less agree with these guys on this (although we did it the right way if we were going to do anything), but the hypocrisy is astounding.
I was wrong about John King if he doesn’t point out the elephant in the room here.
I must have filtered her out. When she speaks I get that Charlie Brown cartoon grownup speak sound in my head…a kind of wonk wonk honking.
216.
dmsilev
Q: Voters hate the GOP. Can you comment?
217.
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
wet suit or latex?
218.
Anya
@Citizen_X: If you consider Iraq and Iran the same country, he’s correct.
219.
dmsilev
Q: Who was a better choice for VP, Biden or Palin?
Long, long silence, and then someone manages to say something anti-Biden.
220.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
@licensed to kill time: Well I heard “three thousand” and “attacked”, it’s possible she didn’t use the actual number code, but did refer to the event.
221.
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
Erotic asphyxiation or amyl nitrite
222.
jwb
@lamh34: I’m sure Romney is very pleased to have Bachmann in. Now I’m sure he is praying for Palin to get in. The person he doesn’t want in the race is Perry.
223.
Alex S.
I don’t know… Pawlenty is not a threat to Romney anymore. I don’t even know why Romney is the frontrunner, but apparently he is. Neither Cain nor Bachmann seem to have the fire to unite the crazies. The field is prepared for Perry.
With any luck they will go for the former– given that it is occasionally fatal there would be some hope that we would be free of these babbling nutjobs.
228.
dmsilev
I guess there wasn’t time for the traditional Reagan-worship round.
229.
Davis X. Machina
@Alex S.:Romney’s a midget, but a midget in a sea of pygmies. And they can’t not nominate anyone.
230.
lamh34
@Alex S.: someone on twitter did say that Perry was one of the “winners” of this debate.
Funny, your parenthetical handle makes me see “Bela Fleck” in a dyslexic sort of way.
241.
fasteddie9318
We are, as usual, hopelessly and fatally fucked.
242.
amk
Did tundra twit’s bus crash the stage yet ?
243.
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
Bieber or GaGa?
244.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
Funny, so on CNN the “analysis” is entirely about cosmetics, the “moment” when Pawlenty didn’t agree to call Romney names at King’s urging, who “looked strong” and who didn’t and so on.
To most of the country it really is just World Wide Wrestling, isn’t it. Only the people at CNN could appear even more shallow than that bunch I just watched. Incredible.
245.
Citizen_X
@Davis X. Machina: Yes, although “Cake or Death?” would be pretty high on the obviosity scale, too.
246.
jane from hell
Hitler or Stalin?
What, too soon?
247.
Cat Lady
“Retardapalooza”
h/t some Wonkette commenter, FTW.
248.
fasteddie9318
I can’t believe nobody responded to the question of what to do about illegal immigrants making use of our health care, education, and welfare facilities by noting that the Republican Party wants to do away with all those things for citizens, so obviously they wouldn’t be there for illegal immigrants anymore. It’s just common sense.
249.
jane from hell
@fasteddie9318: I’m waiting for eugenics to make a comeback. Publicly, of course.
250.
fasteddie9318
I can’t wait for Perry’s campaign to start. Come on, America! Go to the polls and elect another intellectually lightweight, dogmatically Republican Texas governor! What could go wrong?
Perry 2012: Because Lightning Usually Doesn’t Strike the Same Place Twice
251.
Citizen_X
@fasteddie9318: I was thinking along the same lines when Ron Paul said we should bring all the troops home “so we can start taking care of Americans.” I thought, “You mean ‘do nothing for Americans,’ right?”
252.
fasteddie9318
Also too I can’t wait for the quality of debate we’re going to get on CNN in around 50 or so years from now, when the idiocracy has truly set in.
“OK, raise your hand if you ever sent picture of your pee-pee to a lady! Governor Romney, why you don’t raise hand? You don’t like lady, send her picture of your pee-pee?”
I was thinking along the same lines when Ron Paul said we should bring all the troops home “so we can start taking care of Americans.” I thought, “You mean ‘do nothing for Americans,’ right?”
I just assumed “taking care of Americans” meant, you know, “taking care” of them. The best way to keep the leeches from electing unconstitutional commies is to put a few 7.62mm NATO rounds into the leeches, and now that Rand has outed the family plan to round people up for listening to speech that doesn’t pass the AMERICA FUCK YEAH test, I figure we’ll need the Army posted here to enforce the new regime.
255.
Nutella
I got a fund-raising letter from Bachmann last week, claiming that it was for her congressional campaign. (Don’t know how I got on her list. I sent money to her opponent once??)
I need your help, and I need it fast.
__
The Obama Democrats and Left-Wing Radicals have flipped the switch on their attack machine in an effort to silence my voice and derail our conservative movement.
__
Frankly, some of their tactics and comments are so vile….and so disturbing…that I refuse to repeat them.
(Ellipses in original.)
In four pages she never specifies any of those supposedly vile comments.
As far as I know, all the commentary about her has been quotes of really stupid and/or offensive things that she actually said and some speculation about whether she is stupider or more vicious than Palin. Pretty tame, I’d say.
256.
the idler
Bachmann: A thinking man’s Palin.
257.
fasteddie9318
Michele Bachmann has, over the past decade, repeatedly and unsolicitedly sent me several personal messages of a highly graphic and sexual nature. Frankly, the imagery she employs in these messages and the sick, twisted perversions she describes are so vile…and so disturbing…that I refuse to repeat them.
I can has money now?
258.
elle
Listen, seriously. Romney/Bachmann. That would be the smart thing for Romney to do, if Bachmann agrees. I think the presidential race would be really serious if/when this happens. Bachmann would sew up the crazy vote and possibly motivate turnout and Romney already has the vote of not so crazy Republicans and some really dumb independents.
The state repubs are already doing all they can to suppress Democratic voter turnout…you guys could end up with worse than GW.
Darius
7 Minutes, give or take.
My personal drinking game: drink whenever you hear one of the candidates say something that makes you say to yourself, “I need a drink”.
lamh34
I was hoping one of the blogs I read would be liveblogging or at the very least updating their blog readers on the debate.
Especially since as I said in the previous thread: “I would rather scrape out my fallopian tubes and ovaries with a rusty, dull swiss army knife (too graphic???) than watch this debate. ”
I’m grateful that other BJer’s will watch it so I don’t have to….
Sentient Puddle
My drinking game: Drink heavily.
Same effect, less effort.
lamh34
Drinking game
“Obama-care” 1 shot or swig
“Romney-care” double shots or swig
“Obaromney-care” (or whateveh it was Pawlenety tried to come up with on Fox Sunday) – drink the who bottle.
dmsilev
Starts right now. Streams on cnn.com, if you want to inflict pain on yourself.
Anne Laurie
Beat ya to it, Cole… again!
(For the record).
dmsilev
@lamh34: There are a few liveblogs going that I know of. Daily Kos is doing one, as is TPM, and I’m sure there are others.
lamh34
Okay,
So I’ve been at work all day, so I missed Obama’s “pivot” to job speech in NC. So need I ask which story got more coverage “Weiner’s gym pics” or Obama’s jobs speech.
Alex S.
Haha… Santorum: I have 7 children.
Bachmann: I have 5 children and 23 foster children.
Ron Paul: I delivered thousands of babies.
dmsilev
Drinking game: One drink per “cut taxes”, two for “cut capital gains to zero”. Schedule liver transplant for tomorrow.
lamh34
@dmsilev: thx. I “monitor” DKOS, but I don’t frequent it much anymore. So I probably won’t read that liveblog.
I like my liveblogging with alot of snark…so BJ is probably the best place…lol
Keith G
The Christian Science Monitor reports that President Obama has met with his jobs council. They offered him proposals for how to add one million positions to the US job market without help from Congress.
So…which high-skill immigrants do we need to bring in to help shrink our domestic unemployment?
McGeorge Bundy
These people are fucking crazy.
Ho-ly fuck.
Yevgraf (fka Michael)
Seven candidates, one cup.
Ghanima Atreides
the Daily Caller drinking game is amazing.
Lewis seems to hate all the candidates….who is he for?
1. Drink every time the name “Sarah Palin” comes up.
2. If Herman Cain mentions “Herman Cain,” eat a slice of pizza.
3. When Michele Bachmann refers to anything along the lines of “principles our nation was founded on,” take a shot.
4. If Newt Gingrich modifies anything with the words “shockingly” or “fundamentally,” take two shots.
5. If Herman Cain defers policy decisions to his “experts” drink as much as your nearest “expert” tells you to.
6. If Mitt Romney brings up health care on his own, drink 1 gallon of milk.
7. Every time the word “Mormon” is mentioned, drink a venti.
8. When Rick Santorum talks about defeating Democrats in the ’90s, drink 2 Yuengling.
9. If Santorum tells you to google “Rick Santorum,” take 2 shots.
10. Whenever Ron Paul references the constitution or says “it’s not in the constitution,” take a drink.
11. When Tim Pawlenty says he won’t be “entertainer in chief” or any variation thereof, down a beer. (If he says, “Obamneycare,” down 2 tequila shooters.)
12. Whenever Michele Bachmann makes a mistake with basic history, drink 1 Pabst Blue Ribbon.
13. When Herman Cain discusses Muslims, drink as much as you like, with the understanding that Sharia law will be applied for as long as he is speaking.
14. When Newt Gingrich says “Callista,” ask your wife if it’s ok for you to take a drink. (If you are single and watching at a pub, kiss a waitress.)
15. Every time Ronald Reagan is mentioned, take a drink.
AllahP explains the fake focus groups and the twitter screen, and is actually hoping RINO appears behind the candidates.
dmsilev
Ouch. John King actually asks a semi-hostile question: “Tim Pawlenty, since your tax plan is just Bush 2.0, where were the jobs under Bush’s plan”. Pawlenty: 5%, 5%, 5%.
Do you think Palin’s verbal ticks are contagious?
McGeorge Bundy
Pawlenty: 5% growth because I want it bad enough.
Also, dude has the worst haircut of all time.
DarrenG
Live blogging with extra snark?
http://twitter.com/#!/pourmecoffee
Ezra Klein is pretty sharp on Twitter so far, too.
dmsilev
Oh my. Bachman is formally running.
jane from hell
#seriouslyMichele? #drinkthewholebottle
ETA: she sounds like she started shelebrating early
Fucen Pneumatic Fuck Wrench Tarmal
my drinking game, i am going to blast anal c. songs in lieu of republicans speachifying in memory of seth putnam. later when its rebroadcast, right now its hockey go canucks!
dmsilev
Ron Paul: Bring us back to the 1930s! Yay Great Depressions!
McGeorge Bundy
I’ve never been so frightened and so entertained at the same time.
pattonbt
@lamh34: Your friend and my friend Wonkette is doing the honors this evening.
abo gato
Made it through about 4 minutes…..then knocked back the tequila shot I had, went and got another and changed the channel over to Lawrence. Only because I didn’t like what was on the Food channel. Fuck these fucking fuckers.
Litlebritdifrnt
One drink for each instance of “lower taxes” “small business” “deregulation” and “entrepenuers” you will be clinically dead by 10pm. Bonus points if you can also drink to each instance of “strong national defense” without falling into a coma before 9:30.
JPL
@Alex S.: Is that true? Maybe I do have to stream the debate.
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
BREAKING
Weiner to resign. It was inevitable. TPM has the info http://tinyurl.com/2g9mqh
Steeplejack
I didn’t know the debate had started, but I have started drinking. Must be some kind of Jedi “feel the Force” thing.
As for the drinking rules, I think Darius nailed it at 1.
And can you really call it a “debate” with that many “sides”? I presume it is every candidate for him- or herself.
Kirby
I take a drink whenever someone says something reasonable and constructive that I agree with. Of course, I’m the designated driver.
srv
Larry Summers suddenly decides austerity isn’t a good idear after all during a recession/depression.
And Austan Goolsbee can’t do any more damage except at the University of Chicago, like that would be any loss. Maybe he can get an office in Milton’s institute there.
Calouste
CNN did a poll before this debate. The 7 candidates on stage collected a whole 59% of the votes between them. Most of the rest went to Palin and Rudy G.
dmsilev
Blah blah blah. Obamacare is a job killer. Blah blah blah.
Someone hit the talking-point-o-matic, it’s stuck again.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
Bachmann just actually said “As Presnit of the Nunited States”.
Caricature can’t keep up anymore.
srv
@Mike Kay (Chief of Staff): If it’s not on his Twitter account, it’s not real.
dmsilev
Poor Mitt is flopping around like a freshly-landed trout about the whole Romney-care thing.
Ghanima Atreides
@Steeplejack: its a demolition derby of clown cars.
Anne Laurie
@Keith G:
Now you got me lookin’ for the hemlock.
I can deal with my enemies; gods protect me from my ‘allies’, President Obama.
General Stuck
Finally, our long national hotdog is over.
Villago Delenda Est
@dmsilev:
My schadenfreude meter is in danger of exploding with delight.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
@dmsilev: “Mr President, why didn’t you call me when you modeled your plan on MA, I would have disavowed responsibility for having done it right away!”
dmsilev
Long-time GOP activist: “Convince me that you’re not crazy”
MobiusKlein
@Mike Kay (Chief of Staff): or that shit is way old.
EL
Holy Cow – this questioner is asking them to be reasonable! I can just hear the shouts of “RINO” coming from the nutjobs.
Steeplejack
@Ghanima Atreides:
Heh. I need a flow chart to cover this. I can already tell I won’t be able to read after the first 20 minutes under these rules.
dmsilev
@General Stuck:
If your political scandal lasts for more than 4 weeks, seek immediate medical attention.
RandyH
I think John King ought to do his job and question the patriotism of everyone not wearing a flag pin.
JimPortlandOR
If we all had to take a big swig for every lie told tonight by the “candidates”, everyone would be drunk on their ass by the end. I caught 5 min. just now, and couldn’t handle it, so left. Michelle lied about the health care law, big-time, and noone even raised an eyebrow. Then Romney pledged to end Obamacare on his first day in office (not bothering to worry about the Congress passing repeal).
It is so bad it is evil.
srv
Did King ask for a Birth Certificate check?
Andre
I take it we’ve all had time to read John Ziegler’s unintentionally hilarious “Why Palin Shouldn’t Run For President” article?
It’s pure comedy gold.
Anya
Better than a drinking game, every time someone talks about family values, have sex with someone from the opposite sex or hire a hooker in honor of the family values party.
Reality Check
Just wait until Rick Perry gets in!
PhoenixRising
My God, Michelle Bachman cleans up well for a trip to town…
That is scary.
dmsilev
Michelle Bachman: If I wish really hard, Obama will lose.
lamh34
meme on twitter…T-Paw backing off criticism of Romneycare.
GOP strategist mostly saying you coined “Obamneycare” you should own it.
I think T-Paw is running for VP to Romney’s President.
and I see Bachmann is in.
JPL
The tea party is made up of democrats…yeah right asshole..Koch is a former dem. I can’t believe that I am streaming this shit.
ken
obama is going to destroy these people.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
Bachmann: “The Tea Party is a delicate blend of pekoe, oolong, and lunatics”
Oh this was quite an image:
“We need all of us on a three-legged stool”.
No, sorry seeing this collection just standing on a stage is already surreal enough, thanks.
lamh34
@chucktodd
dmsilev
Question: How do you bring manufacturing jobs back to the US?
Ron Paul: The Federal Reserve is evil.
JPL
hahaha..how do you plan to increase manufacturing jobs..can’t wait until romney answers this one..hahahahaha
Reality Check
Shut the fuck up Ron Paul. Crazy asshole coot.
GOOOOLD!
jane from hell
@dmsilev:
“If your political scandal lasts for more than 4 weeks, seek immediate
medicalmedia> attention.”new improved
+3
dmsilev
Pawlenty: “I’m not for being stupid”
(Looks at GOP) Slow pitch, right down the center.
Martin
My drinking game idea:
Take a drink for every hand raised in support of something disproven prior to the Civil War. Two drinks for anything disproven prior to the American Revolution.
Alas, this thing is on 3 hours before the sun sets and I got shit to do, so the drinking will have to wait. Someone keep a tally of what I owe and I’ll set it right after I’m done with the power tools.
Reality Check
Right on, Tim. Take a chainsaw to business regulations and watch the economy roar.
dmsilev
Bachman: Kill the EPA. Because smog and acid rain create jobs.
lamh34
@UncertaintyVicePrincipal:
Wait isn’t that usually the punchline to a dick joke, or did she really say that?
Mr Stagger Lee
@General Stuck: NMA.tv or Apple Daily News has had some fun over the Wanking Weiner Wong story.Here is the best version, please stay until the end. plus a swipe at Daily Kos
ChrisNYC
Santorum is a really truly evil person.
EL
Santorum didn’t really just say “trickle down” did he?
JPL
nice call out to rush..time to go spit up…
dmsilev
Santorum: I have no sense of humor. Even a lame one.
lamh34
reading the tweets on twitter, it seems like Bachmann is stealing the show from T-Paw. The consensus is that Bachmann’s performance so far means Palin for President is DOA.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
@lamh34: No she really did, or “all of us as a three-legged stool” maybe? Went by fast but “on” is how I heard it.
It just dawned on me: This really is their field, at this point, isn’t it. Wow are they doomed.
McGeorge Bundy
Conan or Leno? Somebody shoot me in the fucking face.
But the evident disgust on Santorum’s face when he answered that question was hilarious.
jane from hell
Thank you, King- what this debate was lacking was a little levity! Wait. I mean brevity.
Martin
@Reality Check: Maybe we can repeat that subprime mortgage economic expansion! Woo!
Martin
@EL: Well, Santorum has been known to trickle down…
jane from hell
@jane from hell: fail
Zach
On right-to-work, why doesn’t anyone ever ask, “Why shouldn’t I have the right to make a contract with my employer saying that they’ll only work with a union?” Or, “Why should states like Wisconsin be allowed to break contracts with their employees?”
The sanctity of contracts is one of the pillars of libertarianism — it’s fundamental to owning property. The confluence of libertarians and right-to-work shows how hollow CATO, Heritage, etc are when they claim ideological purity.
dmsilev
@lamh34: I can’t wait until Palin hears that. She’ll react oh-so-amusingly to the idea that there’s a new queen bee around.
Alex S.
How are they going to fill the 5-6 debates they probably have to do when they all say the same three or four things regardless of the question asked?
Anya
from my boyfriend Ezra Klein’s twitter.
JPL
Can we send the definition of a debate to King? x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x. WTF.. So will Romney win because he does not have to answer any questions…
ChrisNYC
Blitzer said that the Obama campaign is “scared” of Rick Perry. Ha! Yeah, right.
Zach
@dmsilev: Yup; if Bachmann keeps killing this, Palin’s going to be in the next debate for sure.
dmsilev
Ron Paul: I am a libertarian. Therefore, please don’t take me seriously.
Martin
@dmsilev: Well, it does – by killing people. Maybe the GOP should consider just cutting to the chase: everyone with a social security number that ends with 4 – get in the oven! Instant 10 million new jobs!
lamh34
Wow. People saying Pawlenty’s refusing to re-state his crack against Romeny to his face is “cowardly”.
T-Paw not coming off good in this. I expect all the punditry to call T-Paw on his “wussiness”.
If you gonna talk shit about someone then ya gotta be willing to say it to their face.
dmsilev
@Alex S.: By saying the same thing 10 or 20 times over. And then filling the remaining time by chanting “Reagan” over and over again.
gbear
@lamh34: My prediction is that Pawlenty pulls out a gun and shoots Bachmann 47 times before the debate ends.
Alex S.
They should ask the question whether there needs to be any government at all? Democracy is sort of socialist anyway.
Mike in NC
@General Stuck:
The media is going to relish this.
jane from hell
Republican Jeopardy! The Answer Is Smaller Government, What Is The Question?
JPL
Cain just spoke about tarp and I have no idea what he said and now Romney is talking about the auto industry and he actually suggested something…
dmsilev
Mitt Romney: Kill the auto companies. The fact that they repaid the loans is irrelevant. Also, unions are evil.
EL
@Martin: My nomination for post of the day.
JPL
Romney..is saying wtf..i was right..
Kirk Spencer
@UncertaintyVicePrincipal:
It’s everyone but (maybe) Perry, but yes, they’re doomed.
(edited to add) Oops, forgot about Huntsman. (like just about everyone else – which gives a good idea of his chances in 2012.)
dmsilev
All Republican candidates: Bush should have killed the auto companies.
Alex S.
What did Santorum say about sticking fingers into something?
Reality Check
Pawlenty/Perry 2012.
JPL
Newt is now pretending what if we didn’t have all these space flights..we would me living on the moon or something.
licensed to kill time
John King keeps grunting into his mic. So weird.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
Newt reminds us that it was the private sector that landed us on the moon.
I’ve long suspected that Newt comes from there.
Zach
I’d like to see Newt’s calculus on three to four permanent space bases. Is he sure it wouldn’t be two or five?
lamh34
Wait did they REALLY ask a Leno or Conan question?
WTF is this supposed to be a REAL debate?
General Stuck
Gingrich – Let’s get a space program that works.
line of the night
JPL
Pawlenty…the unions created the bubble and the mess so they have to live on the street…oh well
Alex S.
Newt Gingrich is the least conservative guy on this stage, ha!
Steeplejack
Jeez, I cannot drink enough to watch more than a few seconds of the debate at a time. Just flipped over to hear Newt talking about how if we had taken all the money NASA has received since we landed on the moon and given it to the private sector in incentives instead, we would now have a permanent station on the moon and three or four “delivery vehicles,” and Natalie Portman would be representing us in the galactic Senate.*
* Okay, I made that last one up.
ETA: Bruins are en fuego. Up 3-0 in the first period.
Zach
There needs to be a question for every candidate to answer: You all want to shrink government. Can you briefly describe what the government *should* do?
RandyH
Pawlenty’s not going to make many friends in the Republican money establishment. “End Crony Capiitalism?” “FAIR Trade?” WTF?
C.J.
Man, Ron Paul’s use of actual economic words makes the rest of them look like usual politicians. Too bad his ideas are wacky.
Gravenstone
Alternating between Cubs-Brewers and Top Gear. Not enough money in the cosmos to entice me to watch the Republican circus train that will be the debate. Still, carry on y’all, the snarky summaries are quite appreciated.
dmsilev
The inside of Ron Paul’s head is a tape loop with about 15 seconds of voice on it. Repeating over and over and over again.
JPL
oh goodie..food safety..
Svensker
@General Stuck:
I don’t know why, but that made me laugh.
General Stuck
Shorter Wingnuts et al
Let the motherfucker burn, then git yer own.
JPL
cain..well maybe food safety but i’m not talking about that..he sounds like sarah
dmsilev
Mitt Romney: Privatize FEMA!
wengler
“The government has to do much less, much sooner!” rallying cry of the Ron Paul.
JPL
romney is trying to sound intelligent but he’s having problems
ciotog
Let’s have the private sector do tornado cleanup.
Davis X. Machina
@General Stuck: Mars, bitches?
Zach
@RandyH: Have you paid any attention to the rhetoric at Tea Party rallies? The crony capitalists flip on the holotelevision, lean back in their truffle-encrusted lazy boys, and lie back and laugh at protests against TARP whilst lighting cigars with thousand-dollar bills.
The capital class rallied to end Huckabee’s run in 2008 because he seemed like a genuine threat in this respect. Other than Ron Paul and maybe Herman Cain, none of these folks are a problem.
ChrisNYC
It is interesting that all the voters are asking, “What would you do?” And the answer is always, “NOTHING!” Not a good takeaway.
dmsilev
Ooh, it’s the “who hates Medicare the most” round!
JPL
Is it just me or is this debate stupid? Paul is now talking about medicare but talking about covering children wtf..
For some reason I figure the folks at Wonkette are smashed.
jane from hell
@dmsilev: fits my Republican Jeopardy! theme.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
Newt is tap dancing impressively fast for a largish man.
lamh34
@JPL:
serously. CNN should be ashamed. these dumb ass “this or that” questions are stupid.
This “twitter/youtube” debates of CNN are too damn gimmicky. Ask some real damn questions.
I hate Faux news, but CNN deserves their low ratings.
C.J.
Rick Santorum uses the third person because Rick Santorum likes yelling!!
dmsilev
Gingrich was actually reasonable about the whole “people like Medicare, so taking a meat axe to it might not be smart” thing.
RandyH
Is it just me or does Santorum always look constipated? Maybe it’s the opposite, though – anal leakage.
licensed to kill time
Republicans: We want to change Medicare (guaranteed care) into Maybecare (maybe you get care, maybe you don’t).
Isn’t it exciting?!
srv
Which candidates grandkids can I throw off the bridge in wheelchairs first?
Alex S.
@lamh34:
CNN should ask Romney: Fox News or CNN?
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
Cain: I’m appalled that Democrats used scare tactics about health rationing that we used to use also and that I’m about to do again in the next breath.
BDR
@licensed to kill time:
“Maybecare.” Perfect.
JPL
i really hate these guys…
Joel
These CBC announcers are such Canuck homers.
BDR
“Where are the president’s ideas?” In his fucking budget, you empty suit.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
@dmsilev: Yes but while trying to pretend that he actually agrees with Ryan and wasn’t aiming the criticism at him, at the same time. He was talking so fast trying to rationalize the two he was a blur.
BDR
“If the president would be honest about things, as I lie about how much ‘Obamacare’ costs…”
gbear
Elephant Talk
It’s only talk…
GambitRF
Hoping this somehow takes a cue from pro wrestling and all of a sudden music starts playing, John King yells “BAH GAWD, THAT’S RICK PERRY’S MUSIC!” and Rick Perry runs out on stage and starts powerbombing people through their lecterns. Pretty much the only thing that could salvage this at this point.
JPL
I finally had to turn them off and put on hockey..Is it really 4/0?
edit..the bruins might be dominating in the first quarter..understatement..huh
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
anyone mention reagan?
licensed to kill time
@BDR: It’s something to look forward to in our Golden Years, the Maybeness.
dmsilev
And now the “more Christian than thou” round. Should be amusing to hear Romney’s answer.
Ash Can
@dmsilev: When Newt Fucking Gingrich is coming off as the reasonable one in the room, you know you’re fucked.
Zach
There needs to be a reality show set in Dearborn, MI.
BDR
Ah, Pawlenty and Santorum giving their perspective on how the founders really didn’t care about mingling of church and state.
If you listen closely, you can hear Jefferson, Madison, and Adams spinning in their fucking graves.
BDR
I love Newt saying terrorists will lie when they take the oath, so we’ve got to ask people to tell the truth before they work in the White House — do you hate America? Brilliant.
srv
It’s controversial to ask cabinet members to be loyal to America? Who are all these Jihadi’s trying to get on Newt’s cabinet?
bjacques
Cain: Clean up the abcesses of government!
Bachmann: Raise the death ceiling!
This has taken a turn for the morbid.
And commies and Muslims pollute our precious bodily fluids. And lie about it.
dmsilev
@Ash Can: Pretty much, yes.
Zach
The folks Romney’s talking about didn’t come to American because of religious tolerance. They largely came to America to establish one-religion, puritanical communities operating by religious law. A bunch more traveled around trying to coerce other people into doing the same thing.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
The Republican Party has just come out against hiring anyone who tells you in the interview that you’re his enemy and that he’s committed to your destruction.
Man, that’s going to change things.
JPL
I gave it my best and wanted to hear about their policies and their ideas to move our country forward but I failed. There was only so much who do you like better questions I could take. Personally I could care less who they like more. I’m sure that someone better than me will post earth shattering news about moving the economy.
dmsilev
OK, the gay-hating round.
4tehlulz
Has anyone asked the vital “Ginger or Mary Ann” question yet?
jk
@jane from hell:
John King is too fucking dumb to run a lemonade stand.
BDR
“The best possible way to raise a child is with a mother and a father, and I was raised by a single mother.” — Bachmann
Seems pretty cruel to blame your single mother for why you turned out so batshit crazy, Michelle.
jwb
@ChrisNYC: When you are putting your hope in a known secessionist, you know you’re in trouble.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
Ron Paul wants a dictionary-based system of law. Hmmm, intriguing. Especially in a few years when “Santorum” appears in the new editions.
BDR
Did Bachmann just say she supported a federal constitutional amendment outlawing gay marriage but that didn’t mean she would go into the states and overrule their laws in support of gay marriage?
Can someone explain to her how the constitution applies to the states?
BDR
“As commander in chief, I would want to consult with the commander in chief.” Brilliant.
bjacques
That does it; tomorrow I’m applying to Sharia law school. I hear you can lie on the application.
And Romney’s the Smiler from “Transmetropolitan.” Also.
PhoenixRising
Shorter John King: “Although our viewers don’t give a damn about these issues, my contract requires me to beat up on gay people because this is a Republican debate…so let’s take time away from the issues voters ARE concerned with, to stake out our positions on the rim of the endless lake of fire Corporal Sissyboy and his wedding planner RuPaul need to be pushed into…”
dmsilev
Q to Santorum: Is Romney a pro-life flip-flopper?
BDR
I really wouldn’t use the phrase “taking the bullets” when talking about the abortion issue. Sorta reminds people just which side of the debate has been shooting people on the other side.
Svensker
@BDR:
Who said that?
BDR
If the live and remote crowds for this debate were any whiter, they’d be translucent.
BDR
@Svensker:
Bachmann. She was trying to say as president she’d consult with commanders on the ground about DADT, but called them “the commanders in chief.”
jane from hell
No plants in *this* audience.
Cacti
Does Ron Paul support abolishing the Air Force.
The constitution doesn’t actually contain the words “Air Force” and if they didn’t need flying machines in 1776, then neither do we.
Zach
@jk: Seriously? This is way better run than any of the 2008 GOP debates even though at least 3 of the candidates are total jokes. He presses with some pretty good follow-ups. Way weaker than he could be, but the audience would turn on him if he was any harsher.
ppcli
@UncertaintyVicePrincipal: Whew. Good thing I got tenure before the first year of the Santorum régime. I would have been tripped up by that clever ruse.
Citizen_X
Ron Paul: “the border between Iraq and Afghanistan.” WTF?
Svensker
@BDR:
Thanks.
jane from hell
Are they getting points for deflection?
bjacques
I like Ron Paul’s joke about a 5-year-old illegal immigrant walking into a hospital, but he lost me on the punchline.
Newt wants to cut jobs from the Department of Redundancy Department and transfer them to the Natural Guard.
Martin
@Cacti: If the founders wanted us to have electricity and computers, they would have said so!
scav
@jane from hell: fungi? or have we sunk below the eukaryotic level?
Calouste
@Citizen_X:
The location formerly known as Iran.
BDR
Pawlenty wants to get around birthright citizenship by appointing conservative judges … who presumably wouldn’t be bound by the clear fucking text of the 14th Amendment?
Martin
@Citizen_X: If you’re willing to deny the existence of 73 million people, you could consider Iran to be a very wide border.
bago
It’s a fair bet that us wonketeers are smashed. My god, it’s full of booze.
Third Eye Open
@bjacques: Who is Spider Jerusalem since Hunter is makin’ dirt?
Leadpipe
Less government. More border security. Let’s privatize the borders with firms hired by Republican state governors.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
When Newt proposes nuance and shades of gray this crowd hears nothing. It’s out of the frequency range entirely, they just hear a sort of buzzing until a red meat talking point appears.
hilts
@Zach:
I think a single debate with a live audience is appropriate and that’s it. When candidates have 1 fucking minute to answer a question, too much time is lost by these assholes applauding like trained seals after every answer.
King’s “this or that” question is the hallmark of an airhead not a journalist.
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
Reagan or Jesus?
Cacti
@BDR:
It falls right in line with Scalia’s pronouncement that the word “person” in the 14th amendment doesn’t mean women.
jane from hell
@bago: very uhmmm, blingy over there right now.
Zach
Romney’s pretty good at this. The gut reaction would be to say eminent domain’s always bad, but that newsman (who’s asked almost all of the good questions and phrased them in a way that didn’t allow them to dodge) was so ready to hit back with the Big Dig if he’d said the wrong thing. I doubt he prepped for that question, but maybe he was ready for it since it was a bigger topic in the ’08 debates when Kelo/NewLondon was more relevant.
inthewoods
@Mike Kay (Chief of Staff): Thank you for making me laugh again.
jane from hell
Weee! It’s a hippie peace rally! No more war!
dmsilev
@Mike Kay (Chief of Staff): There’s a difference?
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
Hey I just realized, no one said 911 yet. Until now. Wow. 11 years, but they finally stopped burping it up as punctuation.
If they had only allowed cross-dressing….
edit: Spoke too soon, just hadn’t gotten to the 911 round yet I guess.
Martin
@Cacti: If Congress had intended whores, they would have said whores. -Scalia
dmsilev
Ooh, Bachman with the extra style points for a gratuitous anti-France swipe.
Citizen_X
So, Bachmann thinks we shouldn’t be in Libya, but we should be leading the war?
jane from hell
LEAD from behind! That way you can *both* watch The Daily Show!
licensed to kill time
Newt dropped the first 9/11 wordbomb!
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
dead girl or live boy?
Zach
Wow. What the hell ever happened to supporting the troops? I more or less agree with these guys on this (although we did it the right way if we were going to do anything), but the hypocrisy is astounding.
I was wrong about John King if he doesn’t point out the elephant in the room here.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
@licensed to kill time: No Bachmann beat him to it.
What did she say about France? I was typing.
bjacques
Bachmann says Obama is the Hindmost but we are not a nation of Puppeteers.
Why does Cain want to paralyze (plagiarize?) his grandmother?
Pawlenty? Our enemies are asymmetric and our response is lopsided.
lamh34
so wait, Romney looked at Cain with disgust???? someone posted that on twitter.
Also, T-Paw’s stocks are tumblimg, and Romney just smiling the whole time.
But I’m betting he’s thinking now that T-Paw hasn’t manned up, that he’s gotta look over his shoulder at Bachmann!
lamh34
Ughhh! Is this shit over yet?
licensed to kill time
@UncertaintyVicePrincipal:
I must have filtered her out. When she speaks I get that Charlie Brown cartoon grownup speak sound in my head…a kind of wonk wonk honking.
dmsilev
Q: Voters hate the GOP. Can you comment?
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
wet suit or latex?
Anya
@Citizen_X: If you consider Iraq and Iran the same country, he’s correct.
dmsilev
Q: Who was a better choice for VP, Biden or Palin?
Long, long silence, and then someone manages to say something anti-Biden.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
@licensed to kill time: Well I heard “three thousand” and “attacked”, it’s possible she didn’t use the actual number code, but did refer to the event.
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
Erotic asphyxiation or amyl nitrite
jwb
@lamh34: I’m sure Romney is very pleased to have Bachmann in. Now I’m sure he is praying for Palin to get in. The person he doesn’t want in the race is Perry.
Alex S.
I don’t know… Pawlenty is not a threat to Romney anymore. I don’t even know why Romney is the frontrunner, but apparently he is. Neither Cain nor Bachmann seem to have the fire to unite the crazies. The field is prepared for Perry.
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
And lastly, John King: Imbecile or sycophant?
bjacques
“Governor Romney, Coke or Pepsi?” Coke, says Mitt.
WTF??? Mitt’s a Mormon! He’s lying like one of those bad Muslims that want to destroy America!
licensed to kill time
Ok. we end it with a big Platitude round.
JCT
@Mike Kay (Chief of Staff):
With any luck they will go for the former– given that it is occasionally fatal there would be some hope that we would be free of these babbling nutjobs.
dmsilev
I guess there wasn’t time for the traditional Reagan-worship round.
Davis X. Machina
@Alex S.:Romney’s a midget, but a midget in a sea of pygmies. And they can’t not nominate anyone.
lamh34
@Alex S.: someone on twitter did say that Perry was one of the “winners” of this debate.
hilts
@UncertaintyVicePrincipal:
Imbecile by a very thin sliver.
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
@UncertaintyVicePrincipal: I’ll take both, as they aren’t always mutually exclusive. See, e.g., John King.
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
Heroin or Cocaine?
hilts
@Davis X. Machina:
Romney’s finest moment tonight was when he gave the score in Game 6 of the Stanley Cup Final.
ciotog
@bjacques: Pawlenty was asked that, not Romney.
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
Kang or Kodos
Citizen_X
And I tossed an evening walk to watch that shit. Bad decision.
Davis X. Machina
‘Stupid or evil?’, I suppose, was just too damned obvious….
Citizen_X
Indica or Sativa?
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
@a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q): I was sort of hoping that someone there would ask him, as a cutesy finish. Too much to ask I guess.
Funny, your parenthetical handle makes me see “Bela Fleck” in a dyslexic sort of way.
fasteddie9318
We are, as usual, hopelessly and fatally fucked.
amk
Did tundra twit’s bus crash the stage yet ?
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
Bieber or GaGa?
UncertaintyVicePrincipal
Funny, so on CNN the “analysis” is entirely about cosmetics, the “moment” when Pawlenty didn’t agree to call Romney names at King’s urging, who “looked strong” and who didn’t and so on.
To most of the country it really is just World Wide Wrestling, isn’t it. Only the people at CNN could appear even more shallow than that bunch I just watched. Incredible.
Citizen_X
@Davis X. Machina: Yes, although “Cake or Death?” would be pretty high on the obviosity scale, too.
jane from hell
Hitler or Stalin?
What, too soon?
Cat Lady
“Retardapalooza”
h/t some Wonkette commenter, FTW.
fasteddie9318
I can’t believe nobody responded to the question of what to do about illegal immigrants making use of our health care, education, and welfare facilities by noting that the Republican Party wants to do away with all those things for citizens, so obviously they wouldn’t be there for illegal immigrants anymore. It’s just common sense.
jane from hell
@fasteddie9318: I’m waiting for eugenics to make a comeback. Publicly, of course.
fasteddie9318
I can’t wait for Perry’s campaign to start. Come on, America! Go to the polls and elect another intellectually lightweight, dogmatically Republican Texas governor! What could go wrong?
Perry 2012: Because Lightning Usually Doesn’t Strike the Same Place Twice
Citizen_X
@fasteddie9318: I was thinking along the same lines when Ron Paul said we should bring all the troops home “so we can start taking care of Americans.” I thought, “You mean ‘do nothing for Americans,’ right?”
fasteddie9318
Also too I can’t wait for the quality of debate we’re going to get on CNN in around 50 or so years from now, when the idiocracy has truly set in.
“OK, raise your hand if you ever sent picture of your pee-pee to a lady! Governor Romney, why you don’t raise hand? You don’t like lady, send her picture of your pee-pee?”
boss bitch
John King forgot a very important question.
Favorite Starburst flavor?
fasteddie9318
@Citizen_X:
I just assumed “taking care of Americans” meant, you know, “taking care” of them. The best way to keep the leeches from electing unconstitutional commies is to put a few 7.62mm NATO rounds into the leeches, and now that Rand has outed the family plan to round people up for listening to speech that doesn’t pass the AMERICA FUCK YEAH test, I figure we’ll need the Army posted here to enforce the new regime.
Nutella
I got a fund-raising letter from Bachmann last week, claiming that it was for her congressional campaign. (Don’t know how I got on her list. I sent money to her opponent once??)
(Ellipses in original.)
In four pages she never specifies any of those supposedly vile comments.
As far as I know, all the commentary about her has been quotes of really stupid and/or offensive things that she actually said and some speculation about whether she is stupider or more vicious than Palin. Pretty tame, I’d say.
the idler
Bachmann: A thinking man’s Palin.
fasteddie9318
Michele Bachmann has, over the past decade, repeatedly and unsolicitedly sent me several personal messages of a highly graphic and sexual nature. Frankly, the imagery she employs in these messages and the sick, twisted perversions she describes are so vile…and so disturbing…that I refuse to repeat them.
I can has money now?
elle
Listen, seriously. Romney/Bachmann. That would be the smart thing for Romney to do, if Bachmann agrees. I think the presidential race would be really serious if/when this happens. Bachmann would sew up the crazy vote and possibly motivate turnout and Romney already has the vote of not so crazy Republicans and some really dumb independents.
The state repubs are already doing all they can to suppress Democratic voter turnout…you guys could end up with worse than GW.
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
@elle: Thanks for the nightmares.
Comrade Kevin
@Nutella: It’s Michele Bachmann’s version of