(Thanks for the opportunity to post here, Doug and John. I hope I don’t embarrass us all.)
Rick Perry is apparently so politically talented, so successful a leader, so gosh-darn handsome — handsomer and more talented and successful even than fellow Bieber-for-journos Jon Huntsman — that all he has to do is ponder a run for president and a New York magazine blogger starts spontaneously writing talking points for him, or at least repeating Perry’s own talking points verbatim without even bothering to try to hide their provenance.
Emphasis added below:
According to The Wall Street Journal, the governor will only declare a candidacy if he thinks the investment of time and energy would actually pay off in a nomination: He’s tasked aides with figuring out whether there’s enough time left to raise the amount of cash a serious run would require and has tested the waters a bit in Iowa. Unlike Sarah Palin’s prolonged fan dance, Perry’s careful consideration mirrors the fiscal prudence that would be one of his chief selling points as a candidate.
The guy hasn’t even declared and a New York-based writer is already buttering him up in order to possibly become his Ted Sorensen?
This is a possibility I hadn’t counted on: that the neo-Confederate, bigot-coddling, gay-bashing Perry might nevertheless be able to seduce Northeast Corridor “liberal media” types just by whispering sweet (and phony) fiscal-restraint talk in their ears. If that happens, it could conceivably work for him all the way through November 2012. And then America really is doomed.
(Cross-posted at No More Mister Nice Blog.)
BGinCHI
They (journos) are all Kent Brockman now.
“I for one welcome our new Alien overlords….”
Martin
Cole needs a real job. Who the hell has time to read all of these different blogs to find you guys?
But welcome aboard. Let me be the first to call you an asshole, republican, firebagger, obot, corporate shill that completely lacks any critical thinking skills and makes everything about yourself.
Make sure to have Cole or DougJ assign you a stalker during your orientation. I’d be a shame for you to miss out.
Oh, and FYWP, also, too.
Sharl
Welcome, Mr. M! Glad to see you here!
In regard to your stated concern:
I for one welcome you to try. But be warned, the bar is raised high.
Villago Delenda Est
The writer of this sentence needs to be publically flogged.
I would say a cool 4 dozen should do the trick.
The notion that ANY Rethuglican is “fiscally prudent” is laughable on its face, as they REFUSE to look at the revenue side.
Martin
Is that the same fiscal prudence that has landed Texas with a $31B budget shortfall over 2 years? Republican voters will love this guy.
M. Bouffant
I’m getting a more than sneaking suspicion that we’re doomed no matter who’s elected.
Maybe it will take another four yrs. of a Republican theocrazy like Perry to destroy the GOP.
slag
Oooh. Did F.re.d get banned? I recommended him as a potential multistalker and my comment evaporated. Or did I get banned for proposing a specific stalker in the first place? This is so exciting!
ETA OK so it wasn’t me. Must have been the F-man. Sweet.
KRK
Welcome, SteveM! I’ve always enjoyed your blog.
SBJules
I heard a CBS radio report from Texas while I was coming home today. It seems some Texans are wondering why a federal disaster declaration hasn’t been made. According to the reporter, Texans wonder if Obama isn’t declaring because he’s worried about Perry. I think Texans better worry about Perry because a federal disaster request must be made by the Governor. Any odds on if Perry’s made the request?
Sharl
[Adding to my #3: don’t worry about it. The generally uninhibited nature of posting here makes for often interesting reading – including that (to me) hilarious post I linked.]
Dennis SGMM
“Fiscal prudence,” riiiiight. Between the Republicans and the media types who are sucking Republican dick, half of the words in the English language will have been drained of their meaning in another twenty years.
James K. Polk, Esq
“I spent all my money on hookers and blow, and all I got was this lousy T-Shirt”
-Gov. Perry
I bet he has one of those Mel Brooks suits with “GOV” printed on the back in huge, white typeface.
JonF
70 billion shortfall over 2 years. And he hid it until after he was re-elected. The ads write them-self.
Zifnab
“Mr. Perry, how will you tackle America’s looming budget deficit?”
“Oh, gosh golly jimmeny crickets. Down here in Texas we’ve got an old saying. Fuck Public Education. Seems ta have done right dandy by this here cattle russlen state. Honkey tonk bull whistle hair piece six shooter, yea-haw.”
“I feel the intense urge to dry-hump your leg”
DFH no.6
Yeah, they fucking notice all right.
It’s done on purpose, you see.
They’re sycophants, not stupid.
abo gato
As a native Texan, let me just say…..fuck you, Rick Perry, with GWB’s dick.
Actually, the rumors are Rick would approve of that.
He is an unmitigated disaster in our state and that is saying a HUGE freaking amount since he followed W. I will go to my grave not understanding the so-called love for this asshole here.
All I know is that the R’s are so stupid they continue to believe the horse shit shoveled out to them by their leaders and are so incurious as to never wonder why things don’t work out for them the way they were told they would by those leaders.
If the rest of us wouldn’t get fucked by them, I’d say let ‘er rip, but we are all on for the ride.
Anyway, I doubt that Rick would want the close scrutiny (if that still exists in our balls-less media) that a run would bring him. I’d love for someone to dig into the gay rumors.
dmsilev
Martin:
I think you forgot ‘libertarian fellow-traveler’. And ‘cudlip’.
slag
Luckily for Texas, he plans to make up the revenue shortage by lowering taxes.
SIA
Welcome SteveM!
Re Perry…the guy is too creepily similar to W. in voice and mannerisms to get near the White House. Even Joe Scarborough (ack!)picked up on it. Run Rick Run! And pick la Palin for VP! You betcha!
ETA: W. and Perry also both have those beady, watching eyes.
Mike Kay (Team America)
You have to remember New York magazine’s chief political writer is Mark Halperin’s writing partner and clone, john heilemann.
This is how they cultivate “inside” access for their next “game Change” tome.
It’ll just be moments before Heilemann (Via New York magazine) and HAlperin (via Morning Blow) are declaring every gop defeat as “GREAT NEWS FOR
McCAINPERRY”ThatLeftTurnInABQ
Fixt that for you.
As for Perry’s credentials, I’d be more interested to know how he polls with Hispanic voters than whether the media is going to fluff him. The latter isn’t just a possibility, it is a given. Count on it, take it to the bank. Our political media will fluff the GOP nominee regardless and fiscal-restraint will be their prefered angle, because LBJ spent a lot of money back before many of today’s reporters were even born and David Broder’s ghost hasn’t shown up rattling the chains he forged in life to haunt their dreams just yet.
Linda Featheringill
Welcome to SteveM. You’ll be fine.
Please stick around and interact with us. That can be, uh, . . . stimulating.
Mike Kay (Team America)
I wonder which gop candidate jane Hamsher’s firm is representing: Bachmann or Perry?
Martin
For what? Having a shitty budget? For being the recipient of the climate change that they most heavily contributed to? For being up against a border full of people armed to the teeth with the very weapons that Texas demanded they have unfettered access to? What preventable thing did they fail to prevent and now wants the Feds to bail them out of?
Linkmeister
Take note that in an independent poll only 9% of Texas Republicans supported a Presidential bid by Governor Goodhair.
Also note that
(via Think Progress.
jwb
Mike Kay (Team America): I see you found a new obsession to replace Wiener’s weiner.
patroclus
Well, I’m all in favor of demonstrating a Thatcherite exuberance for Governor Perry. The only problem is that it must be leavened by a dash of Oakeshottian skepticism.
Derf
“……..If that happens, it could conceivably work for him all the way through November 2012.”
And monkeys might fly out of my butt.
What a ridiculous assertion. Surely you could find something more useful to right about. Like Palins latest tweet.
OzoneR
He’s been governor for 10 years and Texas had a $31 billion deficit! What kind of reporter is this!??!
Mnemosyne
Maybe ABL can lend him a few of hers. You know, just until they can hire someone to blog-stalk him full time.
Dennis SGMM
@martin
Funny how, after all of that secesh bullshit that Perry was so recently spouting, some of those rugged individualist Texans are whining for help from the oppressive federal government.
Conservatives’ ability to think through the consequences of their actions is slightly lower than that of a sixteen-year-old boy behind the wheel of a new Corvette.
arguingwithsignposts
as someone who once covered some tx politics, it amazes me these asshat governors project so much responsibility when they are so damned weak.
Tonal Crow
How much company does Bobo really need?
ETA: Remember, feeding trolls anything but pie causes them to swell up, explode, and fragment into dozens of new trolls.
Josie
Well, there you go. F.r.e.d aka Derf @38 has already revealed himself as SteveM’s new stalker. Ask and ye shall receive.
bemused
Once upon a time Perry pondered secession and now he ponders a prez run. What a country.
Lolis
As a Texan, I can say you guys don’t have any reason to fear Perry. He is not popular here, despite there be a super weak Democratic Party and no real organized opposition to him or his policies. Perry also has a lot of dirt that the one-party nature of Texas politics keeps underneath the surface. I would be thrilled if Perry ran and won the primary.
Also, I get sick of reading all the posts from libs saying we need to watch out for x, y, or z this week. All the Republican candidates suck. I’m not saying it will be easy for Obama, but the public will not be unaware of how much the Republican candidate sucks in 2012.
Mike Kay (Team America)
@jwb: it is too funny. edwards, weiner, and now hamsher is exposed as a gop fundraiser. the learnered blogosphere sure has poor radar.
OzoneR
Wow, epic win for Jane Hamsher. Stoke up the flames of disappointment and cynicism so your clients will have to spend more money on advertising.
Ingenious.
Josie
I have lived in Texas all my life and can safely say that the fact that Republicans look upon Perry as a possible savior is a testament to the absolute paucity of presidential candidates in their party. I do hope they nominate Perry. He would be a disaster as a national candidate.
Sly
Noting that the BJ “meat grinder for newcomers” hasn’t properly kicked in yet, I’ll toss out this snarky observation masquerading as a question:
Were you paying attention at all during the 2000 Republican Primary season?
“No one could have predicted that Northern Republicans would fall for a Texas governor who pontificates about the need for fiscal restraint but demonstrates none.”
Tonal Crow
@Dennis SGMM:
And that is exactly their plan. Perverting the language is the deadliest form of propaganda.
jo6pac
That right on, thanks Sly
slag
I should have known that Cole’s identity hardening scheme would last just as long as it takes for someone to figure out how to clear their browser’s cache.
Jeffro
I’m good with a Perry run…heck, I’m good with most of them. In the end, the closest contest they’ll get is a Romney/Tea Party ticket (most likely Bachman or Rubio) and even that will not save them. Rubio would make it closer, but still…too much crazy over on that side…
Neldob
I think he meant ‘fiscal purience’.
MikeJ
@21:
He got %39 of the Hispanic vote in the 2010 gubernatorial race.
This isn’t a number that impresses Dick Morris, who when talking about the 2000 election said, “…Gore won 65 percent of the Latino community, holding Bush to a mere 35 percent”.
Linda Featheringill
Lolis # 36
I take it you are currently living in Texas. I have a question. In the midst of a really, awful, terrible drought are ordinary Texans considering the possibility that climate change might be real? Never mind whether they believe it wholeheartedly. Do they even think it’s possible?
jl
@40 Sly,
Rick ‘God’s Texas cowboy gift to everything’ Perry versus Bush Jr?
Bush Jr in 2000 was the model of decorum and high seriousness compared to Perry, or the later President Bush Jr hisself.
Bush Jr. did pioneer the politician as cartoon action hero figure PR theme, but only after 911. Perry cannot even imagine anything else.
stuckinred
Lawrence has Axelrod on.
Midnight Marauder
I literally hope and wish every day that Governor Goodhair goes all in for the 2012 Republican presidential nomination, and I can subsequently join the front line in destroying what remains of his credibility and dignity in front of a national (and international) audience. I cannot express how badly I want this. It will be a thing of pure beauty, the way we embarrass that motherfucker on the biggest stage of them all.
I want it. I want it so badly.
I hate that motherfucker more than you could ever fathom.
jl
@35 bemused,
I don’t recall reading that Perry has said for which country he is pondering running for President. Could be Texas.
People better read the fine print.
stuckinred
Midnight Marauder
How could this shithead possibly be embarrassed?
stuckinred
Axlerod says you always hurt the one you love. . .Jane.
Dr. Squid
@5 Martin:
That sounds a bit low. How do you spend nothing and get a budget hole bigger than California’s with respect to the size of its economy? And why is that “fiscal prudence”?
If only there really were a liberal media…
burnspbesq
@ Villago Delenda Est:
When did you become such a softy? I was thinking he should get what William Wallace got.
Linda Featheringill
jl #51
“I don’t recall reading that Perry has said for which country he is pondering running for President. Could be Texas.
People better read the fine print.”
LOL.
jwb
@Mike Kay (Team America): Agreed. It just gets damned irritating reading you writing the same thing again and again and again. Remember this is from someone who is on your side, Obot and all.
Josie
@Midnight Marauder #50: I find your ideas interesting and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
burnspbesq
If we could bring him back from the dead and show him what Texas is like now, I wonder whether President Polk would still think it was worth going to war over.
OzoneR
The Schadenfreude is too good to ignore.
jwb
@OzoneR: Aw, you’re so cute.
Alex S.
Welcome Steve M! I, for one, welcome Perry’s run. He’s certainly weaker than Romney in a general election, but probably stronger in a primary.
Thanks Mike Kay, a very interesting piece of information. I had already assumed as much. Hamsher never has anything good to say.
slag
My guess is he’d pay Mexico to take it.
Sorry, Texans…live by the machismo, die by the mockery.
cat48
Hey, SteveM, welcome.
scav
A multiple-choice question as to which country you are running to be president of might actually get me to watch a repub debate. What with Texas, Alaska, Word Saladanaia and the country founded after Paul Revere warned the British not to touch or tweet our naked crotch pistols as potentially valid answers, an actual debate might break out in between the talking points.
Roger Moore
I, for one, welcome our new SteveM overlord. I’d like to remind him that as a trusted blog follower, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in his underground sugar caves.
Midnight Marauder
Obviously, we can’t make Rick “Governor Goodhair” Perry feel any embarrassment; he’s been well beyond that for eons. But the vast majority of this country has no idea the depths of assholery Perry has engaged in since forever. They don’t know just how abysmal his record is in Texas. They don’t know anything about Todd Willingham and how Perry worked his strings so that an innocent man could die. They don’t know a fucking thing about this:
It’s not about making Rick Perry feel ashamed. It’s about making everyone else feel ashamed that a monster like Rick Perry was ever able to become as powerful as he has.
I was born and raised in Houston, Texas. Spent the first 18 years of my life there. I watched Bush ruin the state (even more) and then pass the reins off the Perry while he went to go shit on the rest of the country. I wasn’t in a legitimate position to do anything about the raise to power of such assholes then.
I’ll be damned if I let the same thing happen this time.
Mike Kay (Team America)
@jwb: you’re too sensitive. nothing more enjoyable than laying people out. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dvdKHxiJdKk
stuckinred
SteveM
Are you a dog person?
burnspbesq
Looks like we’re in the process of being adopted by another kitteh. It appears that Laettner’s litter-mate, who we named Hurley when they started showing up on our front steps in October 2009, but who would never come in the house, is now homeless and hanging around again.
Fax Paladin
“Perry’s careful consideration”? Of course he’s bloody running. He’s been in non-campaign campaign mode since November. It reminds me of his predecessor saying he hadn’t given much thought to a presidential bid even as Rove was redecorating the Old Supreme Court Chamber in the Texas Capitol so it would look *just like* the White House press room…
arguingwithsignposts
@burnspbesq: What, you didn’t name it Hansbrough?
SiubhanDuinne
Welcome to the Juice, SteveM.
I have a follow-up to stuckinred #69: are you a cat person?
Either way — pictures and heartwarming stories, please.
schrodinger's cat
[email protected]
We need more info of the said kitteh. Do you have pictures?
Bob
What the fuck? It’s been several hours since you posted and you have not shown up in the comments. You’re just a stupid chicken shit, afraid to engage, just another E.D. Kain.
Welcome.
Violet
Well of course. Duh. Never forget Chris Matthews’ breathless praise of Dubya’s codpiece during the “Mission Accomplished” small-dick-compensation theater. They’re all about needing a Daddy figure, and Rick Perry and his Texan bluster and good hair fit that bill nicely. Did ya hear? He shot a coyote while out for a run! Manity manly man man!
AnotherBruce
Watch out, the thread police have shown up. Put away the bongs!
burnspbesq
@arguingwithsignposts:
She never whined enough to earn that name.
Martin
No, humans cannot affect the climate. Now, let us pray for rain.
Derf
Slag,
Why would I bother clearing my browser cache? That is too much trouble. Seriously was that what your little sewing circle cooked up? Can you guys plan your way out of a paper bag? Between your collective political analysis and IT skills I don’t know how you people can get through a single day as an adult and not be living in your parents basement.
Now I can totally see why John Galt Cole voted for the texas dummy twice. Because he is no smarter than any other Retuglican. And THAT is because deep down he basically is! You have to be an idiot to vote for Bush…twice and think libertarians have good ideas. No if’s, and’s or buts. STUPID!
I was not interested in calling people names and belittling them. I was not trolling. I was not playing games.
But the gloves are off now!
Arclite
You forgot that he’s a secessionist too.
John Weiss
This is not an ad hominem attack. It’s the truth: Rick Perry is an asshole, a moran, a liar and a cheat. And the office of Governor is a nice title, but the heavy lifting is done by the Lieutenant Governor; it’s been that way since Reconstruction. Because of Reconstruction.
Can’t take ol’ Good Hair very seriously. What little power he has a governor has been consistently used for the dark side.
I wish he would run, so he could be exposed. But that’s why he won’t run.
Take it from an ex-Texan, who had to live with first GDub, then Good Hair. For. Years. Euck!
Svensker
This is a test.
Svensker
OK, so how come my boring test comment comes through and my incredibly witty, snarky, and elegantly pithy comments disappear? Huh?
burnspbesq
@ Svensker:
Wit, snark, and pith are frowned on here. The people in charge appear to prefer shrieking ad hominmen attacks and egregious violations of every form of logic known to man.
Oh, wait. This is Balloon-Juice. I was thinking about FDL.
Never mind.
Caz
Do you have any substantive reasons why America would “be doomed” under Rick Perry’s leadership? Is it just because he’s a conservative?? We’ve had plenty of conservative presidents before and none of them have ever doomed us. Why are you so scared of a conservative president? It seems to me that the most dire times we have faced as a nation have been under liberal presidents.
And in case you haven’t noticed, we are in serious fiscal trouble, and I don’t hear anything from any liberals that would help us in this regard. At least the conservatives out there have some ideas on how to get us out of this hole. What are the democrats proposing? More spending, more government expansion, more government regulations, more government involvement with global affairs that are none of our business.
So please enlighten us – what policies of Perry’s are so terrible that they would doom us in a matter of a single presidential term?
This site is absolutely the most biased, non-substantive, vitriolic, nonsense site out there. I have read literally hundreds of political sites, and this one takes the cake as the most irresponsible, dishonest, fear-mongering one out there.
Odie Hugh Manatee
@Stupid:
You should know that we couldn’t do it without you but it’s possible that you are stupid enough not to know it.
Welcome Steve M! As noted, your stalker should be along shortly, as will the people who are going to be pissed because you haven’t engaged anyone in this thread yet. If you are looking for a corner to piss in, just look for Caz.
He’ll be in it, whining piteously.
Citizen_X
Ooh, Caz! When you talk dirty like that, it almost makes me not want to put the ball gag back in.
John Weiss
@caz:
“Do you have any substantive reasons why America would “be doomed” under Rick Perry’s leadership? Is it just because he’s a conservative??”
I thought I’d explained that. He’s not a conservative. He’s a moron. Don’t believe me? Need some proof? A link? Try the current state of Texas: profound debt, school programs cut back, teachers fired and on and on. Not to mention the textbook bid’ness.
There are no Conservatives in the Republican Party any longer. There are crazy people in the Republican Party. Good ole Rick, the sucessionist guy you apparently love; do you know what succession means? Do you realize that going about with succession talk is treason?
Citizen_X
@ John Weiss: Dog love ya, but, having the root “secede*,” the words are secession and secessionist.
*We know this because there are all too many down here in Texas with bumper stickers that say “SECEDE!” They may be idiots, but at least they’ve spelled the word correctly.
Pedant out.
dollared
@Caz,
Let me put three of your sentences next to each other:
Dude, George W. Bush? Conservative? Check. Total lack of fiscal responsibility? Check. More spending, more involvement in global affairs, more government expansion? Check, Check, Check.
So what exactly are you suggesting? Or has it not occurred to you that the last “Conservative” president was the exact description of what you just said was everything that would be bad for America? Are you really unable to connect those dots? They are pretty big, and they’re close together…..
Pat
Just because some writer at New York Magazine wants to blow Rick Perry does not mean the whole East Coast will want to too.
Please. Get a grip.
Matt
“fiscal restraints” – isn’t that what Republicans put on you right before they make you squeal like a pig? ;)
Ed Darrell
This morning Gov. Perry sent a notice to the special session of the state legislature telling them of the emergency they need to deal with, the threat to morals, peace, conservatism and the American Whey from pat-down searches by Transportation Safety Administration operatives at Texas airports. Though it may shut down aviation in Texas, Perry wants to be sure no one touches his, er, anyone’s junk, especially if that junk includes weapons that could bring down the aircraft. Privacy and morality are more important than safety, as we all learned on September 11, 2011.
Also, please remember that as recently as last November, Perry said the Texas budget was fine, even in surplus. Come the legislative session in January, the state was $27 billion in the red.
Either Perry can’t count, or he managed to lose $27 billion in two months, the most profligate waste of money by any elected official in history.
You’re right: He’s the perfect Republican candidate.
Bulworth
Doesn’t he, like all patriotic conservative teabaggers, have the Obligation to run and defeat that soshulist ursurper Kenyan?
Also, too. As someone who’s been given the privilege of posting at your fine blog, welcome to BJ world. Just buy something from the Tunch store and you’ll be accredited.