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Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

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Come on, man.

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Somebody needs to explain to DeSantis that nobody needs to do anything to make him look bad.

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Happy indictment week to all who celebrate!

Can we lighten up on the doomsday scenarios?

I’m just a talker, trying to find a channel!

If West Virginia and San Francisco had a love child.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

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After dobbs, women are no longer free.

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Fight them, without becoming them!

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You are here: Home / Open Threads / Open Thread

Open Thread

by John Cole|  June 23, 20115:38 pm| 142 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads, Readership Capture, Assholes

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I’m almost afraid to do this, but I will be going to a party for my friends who are getting married on Saturday, and I have to leave the blog unattended for a few hours. Yesterday, I took a 45 minute nap in the afternoon, and that was enough time for you all to crayon the walls, put saran wrap on the toilet seats, feed Rosie a half pound of chocolate, and by the time I woke up the Wednesday race riot had broken out and JSF was daring EEMOM to stick her tongue in the wall sockets.

I’m begging you all. Please behave.

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Previous Post: « Well, So Much for the “Republicans Are Turning Dovish” Conventional Wisdom
Next Post: Thank Bieber for our Galtian overlords »

Reader Interactions

142Comments

  1. 1.

    dr. bloor

    June 23, 2011 at 5:41 pm

    No sweat. ABL will manage this place like Nanny McPhee on meth.

  2. 2.

    boss bitch

    June 23, 2011 at 5:41 pm

    be glad it was crayons and not poop.

  3. 3.

    BGinCHI

    June 23, 2011 at 5:41 pm

    This should cheer you all up:

    Second Season premiere of “Louie” tonight!!

  4. 4.

    Spencer

    June 23, 2011 at 5:42 pm

    whahoo john is gone.

    let’s glue all the furniture to the ceiling! we’re gonna need more crazy glue.

  5. 5.

    Hunter Gathers

    June 23, 2011 at 5:42 pm

    You might want to look into hiring a babysitter. This place resembles a day care center after a visit from the soda and cookie fairy when you’re not around to police the joint.

  6. 6.

    shortstop

    June 23, 2011 at 5:42 pm

    Yesterday, I took a 45 minute nap in the afternoon, and that was enough time for you all to crayon the walls, put saran wrap on the toilet seats, feed Rosie a half pound of chocolate, and by the time I woke up the Wednesday race riot had broken out and JSF was daring EEMOM to stick her tongue in the wall sockets.

    The histrionics have been too much even for me, and I have a way high threshhold for drama, but I gotta say that sentence was freaking hilarious.

  7. 7.

    Comrade Javamanphil

    June 23, 2011 at 5:43 pm

    We are in ur blogz, killing ur civiliteaz!

  8. 8.

    shortstop

    June 23, 2011 at 5:43 pm

    Also, too, I think you would have been smarter not to reveal that you’d be more than five feet away from your computer. But we can discuss your self-destructive impulses later. ;)

  9. 9.

    gnomedad

    June 23, 2011 at 5:44 pm

    I promise not to get my tongue stuck to your flagpole. Even if triple-dog-dared.

  10. 10.

    ABL

    June 23, 2011 at 5:44 pm

    you HAVE seen my open thread from this morning, have you not?

    God bless ya, JC.

    My parents are in town, so after about an hour, I’m gonna be gone. I fully expect that the Asshat Brigade will have burnt this place to the ground by the time you return.

    In any event, I’ll be on the roof with your 50 y.o. Laphroaig waiting for the conflagration.

    RIP Balloon Juice. We hardly knew ye.

    ::pours some on curb::
    ::licks it up because that’s a waste of good fucking scotch::

  11. 11.

    p.a.

    June 23, 2011 at 5:46 pm

    Hamsher Rules. Obama=Nelson=Landrieu. sorry. couldn’t resist.

  12. 12.

    Duckest Fuckingway: Ask not for whom the Duck Fucks. . .

    June 23, 2011 at 5:46 pm

    Ahhhh, quit yer crying, baby!

  13. 13.

    BGinCHI

    June 23, 2011 at 5:46 pm

    I promise not to get my tongue stuck to your flagpole.

    Gosh, there’s a joke there somewhere but I just can’t find it.

  14. 14.

    ruemara

    June 23, 2011 at 5:47 pm

    I behave with all the manners and deportment that this world deserves. So fuck you, you fucking fuckbag of fuck with your fucking parties and your fucktarded blog. Don’t me fucking cut a bitch up in here.

  15. 15.

    TooManyJens

    June 23, 2011 at 5:47 pm

    Some good news for a change: North Carolina's governor just vetoed their new voter suppression law.

    ruemara: Damn, that made me nostalgic for @MayorEmanuel.

  16. 16.

    BeccaM

    June 23, 2011 at 5:48 pm

    But, but, but it was the most entertaining 45 minutes this blog has seen… well, since the last time it happened.

    But okay, I promise not to start the next violent argument on the list, “Which is inherently the better pet, dog or cat?” To be followed with the “should parents be obligated to take screaming kids out of restaurants?” food-fight.

    Now I’ve gone and misplaced my crayons… so what else can I use to mark up the walls?

  17. 17.

    joeyess

    June 23, 2011 at 5:48 pm

    So, does anyone else think that Digby is a pollyanna?

    Or is it just me?

  18. 18.

    gnomedad

    June 23, 2011 at 5:49 pm

    @BGinCHI:
    Reference to film “A Christmas Story” plus seasonal implausibility. Otherwise random.

  19. 19.

    shortstop

    June 23, 2011 at 5:50 pm

    Yay, Beverly!

  20. 20.

    catclub

    June 23, 2011 at 5:50 pm

    Crhis Murphy is now taking up the ethics cudgel against Clarence Thomas.

    How long before Breitbart has a weiner pic of him on Drudge?

  21. 21.

    eldorado

    June 23, 2011 at 5:50 pm

    In any event, I’ll be on the roof with your 50 y.o. Laphroaig waiting for the conflagration.

    @ABL, are you flirting with me?

  22. 22.

    BeccaM

    June 23, 2011 at 5:51 pm

    @ABL: Damn straight that’s a waste of good fucking scotch. Here’s a sponge, get it all. I’d about kill for a dram of 50 yr old Laphroaig.

  23. 23.

    dr. bloor

    June 23, 2011 at 5:51 pm

    Reference to film “A Christmas Story” plus seasonal implausibility. Otherwise random.

    The old “sometimes a flagpole is just a flagpole” defense, eh?

  24. 24.

    Zifnab

    June 23, 2011 at 5:52 pm

    /leans out from behind blog with goat on leash?

    Is it time yet, guys?
    No? Go away? He’s still here?
    Aight.

    /leans back behind blog again.

  25. 25.

    jane from hell

    June 23, 2011 at 5:53 pm

    @toomanyjens, great, until they override her veto again?

  26. 26.

    Mike Kay (The Base)

    June 23, 2011 at 5:53 pm

    A wedding? I dare you to object during the vows.

  27. 27.

    Todd

    June 23, 2011 at 5:54 pm

    PARTY PARTY PARTY PARTY PARTY PARTY PARTY

  28. 28.

    gnomedad

    June 23, 2011 at 5:54 pm

    I assume other have been seeing the ad for “Discover How Librulism Destroys People and Nations”. Just reflecting that the “book” is unlikely to be ordered by anyone uncertain how, you know, it does that.

  29. 29.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    June 23, 2011 at 5:54 pm

    by the time I woke up the Wednesday race riot had broken out and JSF was daring EEMOM to stick her tongue in the wall sockets

    Jesus John, you really don’t read the site, do you? I didn’t comment at all in the first dustup and only commented on the second one near the very end to apologize for causing it all, and then offer qualified support for ABL.

  30. 30.

    El Tiburon

    June 23, 2011 at 5:55 pm

    In that case I’m going to finish off the rest of the blow from 1992.

    I’ll be up whence you all return.

  31. 31.

    Hunter Gathers

    June 23, 2011 at 5:56 pm

    So, does anyone else think that Digby is a pollyanna?

    Nope. Digby’s a cutter.

    Hullabaloo should be renamed ‘Digby watches cable news while picking out new spots to place a scar’.

  32. 32.

    ruemara

    June 23, 2011 at 5:57 pm

    Zifnab Micky? What are you doing here? And where’d you buyfind your date?

  33. 33.

    BGinCHI

    June 23, 2011 at 5:58 pm

    JSF actually a victim. I never thought I’d see it.

    Gnomedad, you pitch softballs, me swing for fence (Cornfucius).

  34. 34.

    TooManyJens

    June 23, 2011 at 5:58 pm

    @jane from hell: The story says they don’t have the votes in the House to override.

  35. 35.

    Cassidy

    June 23, 2011 at 5:59 pm

    Maybe the FDL ratfuckers can come over with some apology beer for stinking up the place.

    Someone had to start it.

  36. 36.

    Mike Kay (The Base)

    June 23, 2011 at 6:00 pm

    Burn Notice season premiere tonight

    Loves me some Fiona

    http://i641.photobucket.com/albums/uu134/see-the-skinny/gabrielle-anwar5.jpg

  37. 37.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    June 23, 2011 at 6:01 pm

    @BGinCHI:

    JSF actually a victim. I never thought I’d see it.

    Oddly, the shitstorms seem to occur whether or not I participate.

  38. 38.

    Hawes

    June 23, 2011 at 6:01 pm

    @catclub

    I know Chris Murphy. In order to become the next great Democratic politician, he had his genitals removed.

    Looks like a Ken doll down there.

  39. 39.

    ABL

    June 23, 2011 at 6:03 pm

    Maybe the FDL ratfuckers can come over with some apology beer for stinking up the place.

    um… that’s not beer… unless it’s the new urine-colored beer i’ve been hearing so much about.

  40. 40.

    Cassidy

    June 23, 2011 at 6:05 pm

    unless it’s the new urine-colored beer

    Budweiser Golden Wheat has been out a while.

  41. 41.

    gnomedad

    June 23, 2011 at 6:07 pm

    @BGinCHI:
    What I should really be embarrassed about is that your first reply was too subtle for me.

  42. 42.

    TaMara (BHF)

    June 23, 2011 at 6:08 pm

    let’s glue all the furniture to the ceiling! we’re gonna need more crazy glue.

    Fix’d.

    I’m going to need to quit my job, I miss all the fun stuff here.

  43. 43.

    Frankensteinbeck

    June 23, 2011 at 6:08 pm

    If someone fed half a pound of chocolate to Rosie wouldn’t A) the earth’s crust crack under the strain, and B) Rosie die of chocolate poisoning?

  44. 44.

    trollhattan

    June 23, 2011 at 6:11 pm

    Pshaw, Cole’s “lengthy breaks” seldom last more than forty-five minutes. Also, too, Zombies!

    http://www.boingboing.net/2011/06/23/electronic-traffic-s.html

  45. 45.

    Cat Lady

    June 23, 2011 at 6:12 pm

    ABL’s Nate Dogg is on duty while you’re gone John. That badass m*f*cker will not be messed with. QED.

  46. 46.

    gnomedad

    June 23, 2011 at 6:13 pm

    Can we borrow the car?

  47. 47.

    Amir_Khalid

    June 23, 2011 at 6:14 pm

    Yesterday, I took a 45 minute nap in the afternoon, and that was enough time for you all to crayon the walls, put saran wrap on the toilet seats, feed Rosie a half pound of chocolate, and by the time I woke up the Wednesday race riot had broken out and JSF was daring EEMOM to stick her tongue in the wall sockets.

    I do believe that a good number of Balloon Juice commenters come here precisely for the opportunity to behave like this — an opportunity not available on most blogs. (Puts on good-little-angel halo.) Me, I don’t indulge in such behavior. I just stand by and watch.

  48. 48.

    bemused

    June 23, 2011 at 6:14 pm

    Evidently, it was too tame around here. John is all but throwing down a triple dog dare to start a gigantic bonfire and throw everything and everybody in it.

  49. 49.

    Amanda in the South Bay

    June 23, 2011 at 6:17 pm

    Here’s a trippy thought: I just mailed my paperwork to change my name and gender on my birth certificate. So, in a few weeks, I’ll be able to legally marry the people I’m not allowed to marry now, and I won’t be able to legally marry the people I’m allowed to marry now.

    How many people can claim that?

  50. 50.

    BGinCHI

    June 23, 2011 at 6:18 pm

    I propose Cole holds a lottery amongst commenters and each week whoever wins gets to be a front pager for that week.

    Methinks Levenson’s pics won’t look so provocative a couple weeks in.

  51. 51.

    Sister Machine Gun of Quiet Harmony

    June 23, 2011 at 6:19 pm

    Disco ball. Check.
    Multicolored flashing lights. Check.
    Dry ice. Check.
    Bathtub of gin. Check.
    Knee high river of foam. Check.
    Fireworks. Check.
    Sacrificial offerings for Tunch. Check.
    Blowtorch. Check.
    Go-go dancers. Check.
    Insane DJ. Check.

    OK, John, have fun!! Don’t worry about a thiiing. Everything will be juussst fiiine.

  52. 52.

    BGinCHI

    June 23, 2011 at 6:19 pm

    @Amanda: Ann Coulter?

  53. 53.

    Frankensteinbeck

    June 23, 2011 at 6:20 pm

    Amanda in the South Bay:
    I have a close friend who suddenly found that gay marriage laws suddenly were not a concern for her marrying her boyfriend.

  54. 54.

    General Stuck

    June 23, 2011 at 6:26 pm

    This peace craze will blow over

  55. 55.

    MikeB

    June 23, 2011 at 6:27 pm

    BJ commenters trashing ABL: BORRRRIING!!

    ABL defending/justifying to said commenters: BORRRRING!!

  56. 56.

    scav

    June 23, 2011 at 6:29 pm

    Missing music. Blogroll Blitz! (Life on Mars version for BBC crowd)

  57. 57.

    BO_Bill

    June 23, 2011 at 6:30 pm

    I like ABL. She is smarter than Sean Hannity.

  58. 58.

    Felinious Wench

    June 23, 2011 at 6:33 pm

    It’s not a decent party without an impromptu fire on a sofa. Who’s bringing the kindling?

  59. 59.

    Linda Featheringill

    June 23, 2011 at 6:35 pm

    Amanda #49.

    My goodness. Do we say congratulations now?

    At any rate, I should think this would be one of the milestones on your journey.

    Maybe we could say Mazel Tov. :-)

  60. 60.

    shortstop

    June 23, 2011 at 6:36 pm

    Jesus John, you really don’t read the site, do you? I didn’t comment at all in the first dustup and only commented on the second one near the very end to apologize for causing it all, and then offer qualified support for ABL.

    This is totally true. But John is going to say that he’s pre-punishing you for future crimes.

  61. 61.

    shortstop

    June 23, 2011 at 6:38 pm

    Also, there isn’t actually anything grammatically wrong with the phrase “heretofore unused.” I’m just sayin’.

  62. 62.

    trollhattan

    June 23, 2011 at 6:39 pm

    Okay everybody, I found Cole’s chemistry set. Let’s do that “Tunchzilla” experiment we’ve all been talking about.

    http://images.google.com/hosted/life/f?q=chemistry+source:life&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dchemistry%2Bsource:life%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26sa%3DX%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-US:official%26biw%3D1177%26bih%3D934%26tbm%3Disch&imgurl=06ae6313d3f6a702

  63. 63.

    Brian S

    June 23, 2011 at 6:43 pm

    Budweiser Golden Wheat has been out a while.

    Last night I saw, for the first time, Mich Ultra with Pomegranate and Raspberry. I hung around waiting for someone to order it so I could follow them out to their car later and hit them over the head with my bottle of Delirium Nocturnum, but no one went for it.

  64. 64.

    BGinCHI

    June 23, 2011 at 6:46 pm

    Brian S, I wish you hadn’t told me that.

    Who drinks that shit? McChrystal?

  65. 65.

    shortstop

    June 23, 2011 at 6:47 pm

    How many people can claim that?

    The night before your new certificate comes in, you need to throw a large party with 1970s-style just-naughty-enough-for-suburbia sexual games, then at midnight all the games change radically and hilarity ensues.

  66. 66.

    shortstop

    June 23, 2011 at 6:48 pm

    I hung around waiting for someone to order it so I could follow them out to their car later and hit them over the head with my bottle of Delirium Nocturnum, but no one went for it.

    Bwa ha ha ha.

  67. 67.

    Amanda in the South Bay

    June 23, 2011 at 6:49 pm

    @ Linda:

    Yay! thanks!
    This deserves some sangria as soon as I get home.

  68. 68.

    Brian S

    June 23, 2011 at 6:49 pm

    BGinCHI, I wish I hadn’t seen it. I don’t understand why a joint that’s nice enough to serve Delirium (among many, many other fine beers) would also carry something as crappy offensive as regular Mich Ultra, much less the one I saw there. It’s not even the fruit part–I like a good lambic. It’s the not really beer part of it that bugs me.

  69. 69.

    jl

    June 23, 2011 at 6:53 pm

    I thought Cole let Tunch climb into the computer to play with the commenters when he was away.

  70. 70.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    June 23, 2011 at 6:55 pm

    @shortstop:

    This is totally true. But John is going to say that he’s pre-punishing you for future crimes.

    Nah, he’s never looking that far ahead.

  71. 71.

    Mike E

    June 23, 2011 at 6:56 pm

    Meanwhile in Mayberry: Our Dem Gov Bev Perdue vetoed the voter ID bill presented to her by our GOP dominated General Assembly. Keep that red pen out, Bev, there’s another half-dozen flaming bags o’ shite to dispose of!

    Btw does anyone else think state repub chair Robin Hayes is Michael Steele’s illegitimate Caucasian stepbrother? It would be irresponsible not to speculate…The Dem party here would be wise to mic this guy as often as possible.

  72. 72.

    Gravenstone

    June 23, 2011 at 6:56 pm

    I like ABL. She is smarter than Sean Hannity.

    Low hanging fruit, dude. A 2 X 4 is smarter than Hannity.

  73. 73.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    June 23, 2011 at 6:57 pm

    @shortstop:

    Also, there isn’t actually anything grammatically wrong with the phrase “heretofore unused.” I’m just sayin’.

    HellifIknow. I just use the words, I don’t make the rules.

  74. 74.

    BGinCHI

    June 23, 2011 at 6:58 pm

    Brian, let’s agree that Mich Ultra Rat Poison should be the one and only flavor of that “beer.”

    Great, now I’m thirsty for a Founder’s Cerise. Or maybe I’ll have a New Glarus Coffee Stout when I get home.

  75. 75.

    taylormattd

    June 23, 2011 at 6:58 pm

    Hullabaloo should be renamed ‘Digby watches cable news while picking out new spots to place a scar’.

    Omfg, I shouldnt be laughing, but I just spit out some diet coke.

  76. 76.

    nancydarling

    June 23, 2011 at 6:59 pm

    I, for one, almost always comport myself like a lady, JC. Actually I am to old to act any other way.

    Good to hear from you Amanda. Do you live in the South Bay of L.A. County (beach cities, Torrance and environs) or the South Bay of the San Francisco area?

  77. 77.

    scav

    June 23, 2011 at 7:00 pm

    @BGinCHI:

    Great, now I’m thirsty for a Founder’s Cerise. Or maybe I’ll have a New Glarus Coffee Stout when I get home.

    If those are your options at home, we’re moving at least part of this party to your place. Who’s with me?

  78. 78.

    Mnemosyne

    June 23, 2011 at 7:03 pm

    So, in a few weeks, I’ll be able to legally marry the people I’m not allowed to marry now, and I won’t be able to legally marry the people I’m allowed to marry now.

    Uh, how many people are you planning to marry? Are you going to turn your apartment into one of those nutty Mormon fundie compounds, only with more gender balance? ;-)

  79. 79.

    BGinCHI

    June 23, 2011 at 7:04 pm

    scav, Mrs. BG is teaching tonight, so the party is on.

    Wait, my place full of B-J jackals?

    I’m just gonna go ahead and pre-call 911.

  80. 80.

    Brian S

    June 23, 2011 at 7:05 pm

    @scav @BGinCHI I don’t have any beer at home right now, but I’m in for half a bottle of Glenmorangie.

  81. 81.

    Amanda in the South Bay

    June 23, 2011 at 7:07 pm

    @ nancy at 76:
    South Bay as in SF Bay Area, Santa Clara County

    @ Mnemosyne:
    We really need polyamorous relationships legally recognized, but I think we’ll probably end the drug war before that ever happens.

  82. 82.

    burnspbesq

    June 23, 2011 at 7:11 pm

    @BeccaM:

    “so what else can I use to mark up the walls?”

    Sharpies! MUCH harder to clean up.

  83. 83.

    DonkeyKong

    June 23, 2011 at 7:13 pm

    There has been too much violence. Too much pain. But I have an honorable compromise. Just walk away. Give me your pump, the oil, the gasoline, and the whole compound, and I’ll spare your lives. Just walk away and we’ll give you a safe passageway in the wastelands. Just walk away and there will be an end to the horror.

  84. 84.

    burnspbesq

    June 23, 2011 at 7:21 pm

    Hmmm … Let’s see.

    Little Feat is the worst band in the history of the universe.

    All NFL officials are completely fair to the Steelers.

    IPads rule and netbooks drool.

    Jane Hamsher sucks Avigdor Lieberman’s dick.

    The ramapo is the only tomato worth eating.

    Did I forget anything?

  85. 85.

    shortstop

    June 23, 2011 at 7:22 pm

    There has been too much violence. Too much pain. But I have an honorable compromise. Just walk away. Give me your pump, the oil, the gasoline, and the whole compound, and I’ll spare your lives. Just walk away and we’ll give you a safe passageway in the wastelands. Just walk away and there will be an end to the horror.

    I can’t tell if you people are even funnier than usual in this thread or if I’m slightly hysterical over losing my largest client due to budget cuts. The giggles sound a little ragged to my own ears, but who knows?

  86. 86.

    shortstop

    June 23, 2011 at 7:23 pm

    Little Feat is the worst band in the history of the universe.

    I knew someday Burns and I would find consonance, if only for a stolen moment. Today is that day.

  87. 87.

    Phoenician in a time of Romans

    June 23, 2011 at 7:24 pm

    Wait, John’s away?!?

    Oh, God – I’m trying, but I can’t… I can’t restrain myself.

    Corset! Cow-pies! Big… big… women’s bicycle seats!!

    Whew – I’m glad I got that out of my system.

  88. 88.

    greenergood

    June 23, 2011 at 7:24 pm

    Amanda #67

    Sangria tonite, but when the papers come BACK, get ABL to share her 50 y.o. Laphroiag with you. Party nite!

    @Becca M
    When I was a toddler, I discovered bananas were particularly good for fresco-painting – monochrome, but if allowed to dry, then pretty permanent…

  89. 89.

    digby

    June 23, 2011 at 7:27 pm

    So, does anyone else think that Digby is a pollyanna?

    I suspect that isn’t really the term you wanted to use to insult me:

    Pollyanna: Belittling and often insulting term for being absurdly optimistic and good-hearted, believing in a good world where everything works out for the best all tht time.
    Talk about laughing out loud …

    Now being a “cutter” — well, that makes more sense. Certainly watching cable news is masochistic and I do feel as if my daily dose is a form of psychic bloodletting.

    What I don’t get is why anyone would find that particular post to be a good example of my “Pollyannaish”/cutter ways.Observing that Republicans are likely to be claim that people are cheating on unemployment seems fairly obvious. Why not choose the debt ceiling laments which are far better examples of my Democratic self-loathing? Color me confused.

  90. 90.

    scav

    June 23, 2011 at 7:28 pm

    Oh, that was fun. Local political polling with a very serious young fellow that I could easily stun by volunteering that I’d vote communist on some days. I live for those little dead-air moments when you can almost hear the little neuronal gerbils spinning without traction.

  91. 91.

    lamh34

    June 23, 2011 at 7:31 pm

    POTUS giving speech to LGBT fundraiser, he said “I believe that gay couples deserve the same legal rights as every other couple in this country.”

    but he didn’t say “marriage”.

    At the end, he told the crowd if they support him in ’12, then “”I promise you we will write another chapter in that story.””

  92. 92.

    Amanda in the South Bay

    June 23, 2011 at 7:34 pm

    Um…who the fuck is Casey Anthony, and why should I care that a murder trial is front page on Google News? Add journo majors to business school grads as being total dregs on society.

  93. 93.

    LGRooney

    June 23, 2011 at 7:35 pm

    @DonkeyKong, 83: Groundskeeper Willie, “And my first act as mayor will be to kill the whole lot of ya’ and burn your town to cinders!”

  94. 94.

    BGinCHI

    June 23, 2011 at 7:36 pm

    Wow, digby sighting.

    Also, Burns, good match yesterday in Copa d’Oro, no? Who knew Adu would figure in it??

  95. 95.

    Violet

    June 23, 2011 at 7:37 pm

    @burnspbesq:

    Did I forget anything?

    Lily doesn’t have enough “personality.” Or, she’s a “bug-eyed worthless little mutt.”

    Note: I in no way endorse this belief, but it’s guaranteed to set JC off.

  96. 96.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    June 23, 2011 at 7:37 pm

    @Digby:

    Color me confused.

    Yeah, I was too but didn’t care enough about whatever these jackwagons say to inquire further.

  97. 97.

    Brian S

    June 23, 2011 at 7:41 pm

    Did I forget anything?

    LeBron James is better than Michael Jordan/the biggest loser of all time?

  98. 98.

    Head Bulshytt Talker in Chief of the Temple of Libertarianism(superluminar)

    June 23, 2011 at 7:41 pm

    Wall outlets? Meh. Try taking an industrial 3phase shock. Fun times and also concussion. Not wanting to give anyone ideas…

  99. 99.

    trollhattan

    June 23, 2011 at 7:45 pm

    @89.digby

    Funny, when I read “cutter” in the original post I thought of “Breaking Away.” Anyway, howdy.

  100. 100.

    Frankensteinbeck

    June 23, 2011 at 7:46 pm

    Violet:
    I can beat that. Dogs in general are fawning, obnoxious examples of why unconditional love is a bad thing, not a good thing!

    How’s that? I’m not good with the profanity and insults, but I can hold an unpopular opinion like nobody’s business.

  101. 101.

    quannlace

    June 23, 2011 at 7:47 pm

    Last night I saw, for the first time, Mich Ultra with Pomegranate and Raspberry.

    Ooh.While you’re knocking back a few you can congratulate yourself that at least you’re getting your anti-oxidants.

  102. 102.

    BGinCHI

    June 23, 2011 at 7:48 pm

    @quannlace: post lacks requisite contempt, derision.

    You fix.

  103. 103.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    June 23, 2011 at 7:51 pm

    @Don’tIHaveAReallyCoolNewNameBlahBlahBlahLookIt’sMeSuperluminar!:

    Wall outlets? Meh. Try taking an industrial 3phase shock. Fun times and also concussion. Not wanting to give anyone ideas…

    I bet you’d never be able to tell with eemom.

  104. 104.

    burnspbesq

    June 23, 2011 at 7:51 pm

    @BGinCHI:

    Yeah, two good matches. I thought for a split second that Espinoza’s shot was going in and Mexico was going out. Hell of a save.

    Who was that impostor wearing number 20 for the US? He was good.

    Looks like we’ve solved our left back issue for a while, unless McLeish buries him on the bench.

  105. 105.

    Mr Stagger Lee

    June 23, 2011 at 7:58 pm

    Hey! Where’s John’s Pittsburgh Steelers stash? I got some Dawg Pound stuff! (BAWHAHAHAAHAHA rubs hands greedily)

  106. 106.

    burnspbesq

    June 23, 2011 at 7:58 pm

    @BGinCHI:

    Saturday’s going to be a bitch. There will be 93,000 people at the Rose Bowl, and no more than 100 will be rooting for the US.

  107. 107.

    Kathy

    June 23, 2011 at 8:16 pm

    @ burnspbest#84
    you forgot “pirates are better than ninjas”

  108. 108.

    Mike Kay (The Base)

    June 23, 2011 at 8:17 pm

    @burnspbesq:

    There will be 93,000 people at the Rose Bowl, and no more than 100 will be rooting for the US.

    I didn’t know netroots nation was having their convention at the Rose Bowl

  109. 109.

    Thoughtcrime

    June 23, 2011 at 8:17 pm

    With visitors like you degenerates, popping in at all hours trashing the place, I can see why Cole has given up dating:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZgOqcH1Ywzs

  110. 110.

    mellowjohn

    June 23, 2011 at 8:17 pm

    why does the jimmy buffett song “gypsies in the palace” spring immediately to mind?

  111. 111.

    burnspbesq

    June 23, 2011 at 8:18 pm

    I finally figured it out! It’s a totally ingenious plan!

    Jane Hamsher: Grover Norquist as Charlotte Corday: Jean-Paul Marat. She’s just working to gain his confidence and trust so that she can do the deed.

    Yeah, that’s it.

  112. 112.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    June 23, 2011 at 8:24 pm

    @doodoohead

    Jane Hamsher: Grover Norquist as Charlotte Corday: Jean-Paul Marat. She’s just working to gain his confidence and trust so that she can do the deed.

    When you made your misogynistic remark upthread, I almost weighed in to smack you around but figured the potential for inciting even more Hamsher fixation wasn’t worth it. How naive I was.

  113. 113.

    Steeplejack (phone)

    June 23, 2011 at 8:26 pm

    51:

    Go-go dancers?! I’m in. I am even off work tomorrow, so I won’t have to call out with some ridiculous excuse.

  114. 114.

    DonkeyKong

    June 23, 2011 at 8:35 pm

    Hummungus [lines spoken offscreen, scarcely audible but coming up in subtitles, while Max is eating the dog food] Smegma crazies to the left! The gate! Gayboy berserkers, to the gate!

    That is from Road Warriors IMBd quotes, I have to find that scene on Youtube to confirm. It’s like haiku, or at least the title of a wicked ABL post.

  115. 115.

    Linda Featheringill

    June 23, 2011 at 8:37 pm

    I Googled myself just for the fun of it. I was told that there are four LF’s living in the US, here, there, and somewhere else. And then there was this stuff connected to my name.

    I figure that if it’s good, then I did it. If it isn’t, one of the other ladies should be blamed. :-)

    Commenting on BJ seems to attract Google and some of those comments were tagged. Also, I wrote a good deal of inflammatory propaganda in the past and some of that is still bouncing from place to place to place. It’s really interesting to see what has survived.

    So . . . I’m famous in my own mind. Not bad, really.

  116. 116.

    Anya

    June 23, 2011 at 8:50 pm

    So, what’s this torching of the place, everyone keeps bringing up? Man, did I miss another mega fight?

  117. 117.

    Woodrowfan

    June 23, 2011 at 8:57 pm

    this time someone else try to superglue Tunch to the ceiling! I still have the bandages on….

  118. 118.

    Luci

    June 23, 2011 at 8:57 pm

    @Anya I missed it too. The fight I mean! But, this is the best thing I’ve read/seen/heard all day, and I’m finding it hilarious. I’m also finding it frustrating not to be able to come up with anything even CLOSE to the humor some of you guys can. I think I shall go drink some box wine.

  119. 119.

    Elisabeth

    June 23, 2011 at 9:01 pm

    Y’all need to check out .
    Freakin’ hysterical ~ I’m posting it everywhere.

  120. 120.

    Elisabeth

    June 23, 2011 at 9:02 pm

    @myself

    Screwed up the formatting but either click the link or go to jonhuntsman.com

  121. 121.

    eemom

    June 23, 2011 at 9:04 pm

    ahem. John Cole.

    I am eemom, not EEMOM.

    Please respect my case. kthxbai

  122. 122.

    JPL

    June 23, 2011 at 9:06 pm

    Earlier..I think I saw a post by ABL sticking her tongue out at all of us but now it is gone… Was that my imagination?
    edit.. nevermind…found it…

  123. 123.

    eemom

    June 23, 2011 at 9:06 pm

    I almost weighed in to smack you around but figured the potential for inciting even more Hamsher fixation wasn’t worth it.

    ooh look…..fuckie’s playing Grown Up tonight. He’s all self-controlled ‘n shit.

  124. 124.

    artem1s

    June 23, 2011 at 9:08 pm

    It’s not a decent party without an impromptu fire on starting a bonfire with a sofa.

    We MFA grads are all closet pyromaniacs at heart. The best parties always involve burning large pieces of furniture… or vehicles.

  125. 125.

    JPL

    June 23, 2011 at 9:14 pm

    Since this is an open thread, I want to ask why the hate for ABL. I’m not black so I can not relate to her experiences but I can tell you that when my friend and I who is black travel to No. GA, I lock my car doors.. Why does she have all the strangers attack her?

    edit…and where do they come from??

  126. 126.

    Woodrowfan

    June 23, 2011 at 9:17 pm

    JPL: I dunno, I kind of like her posts…

  127. 127.

    nancydarling

    June 23, 2011 at 9:17 pm

    JPL, I luvs me some ABL.

  128. 128.

    JPL

    June 23, 2011 at 9:22 pm

    I love ABL’s posts but all these ass..es show up and I tend to shy away from the comments. It’s like there is a signal and they all appear to sting at the same time.

  129. 129.

    PhoenixRising

    June 23, 2011 at 9:27 pm

    I read that as “took a 45 minute crap yesterday” and was worried something was REALLY wrong. But it’s just the same old sh*t.

    I’m sticking ABL with a hat pin, soon’s I find a hat pin.

  130. 130.

    scav

    June 23, 2011 at 9:28 pm

    @artem1s: I supposed the MFA artistic part is closet pyromaniacs setting fire to pieces of furniture instead of closets or cupboards. Cunning and unexpected that. Very PoMo.

  131. 131.

    Phoenician in a time of Romans

    June 23, 2011 at 9:30 pm

    this time someone else try to superglue Tunch to the ceiling!

    Man – is even superglue that strong?

    I assume the ceiling collapsed first?

  132. 132.

    shortstop

    June 23, 2011 at 9:57 pm

    Man – is even superglue that strong?

    Of course. It bonds in seconds!!!!

    I just wanted to say that.

  133. 133.

    Triassic Sands

    June 23, 2011 at 10:05 pm

    I’m begging you all. Please behave.

    Hey, it’s your house. Set a better example and maybe your house guests will quit acting like Huns, flesh-eating bacteria, and sharks with blood in the water. You reap what you sow, John. Enjoy the party, but don’t be surprised if you come home to an empty lot with a huge crater.

  134. 134.

    Citizen_X

    June 23, 2011 at 10:27 pm

    Don’t look at me like that. Did you all think that text was a joke? I told you: “BRINGING 2 POUND BAG OF SHROOMS.” Now shut up and dig in.

    2 hours later: TUNCH COMMANDS US: TIME FOR BURNING MAN/WEST VIRGINIA!

  135. 135.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    June 23, 2011 at 10:32 pm

    @Triassic Park:

    Hey, it’s your house. Set a better example and maybe your house guests will quit acting like Huns, flesh-eating bacteria, and sharks with blood in the water. You reap what you sow, John. Enjoy the party, but don’t be surprised if you come home to an empty lot with a huge crater.

    I don’t think it’s that dire.

  136. 136.

    ABL

    June 23, 2011 at 10:32 pm

    I’m sticking ABL with a hat pin, soon’s I find a hat pin.

    you should use a safety pin. remember, safety first; then teamwork.

  137. 137.

    burnspbesq

    June 23, 2011 at 10:49 pm

    Is your sense of humor under warranty? You should have it looked at by a qualified technician, cuz it’s not working.

  138. 138.

    asiangrrlMN

    June 23, 2011 at 11:03 pm

    @Steepman, did someone say go-go dancers? (Yes, I know it was referenced earlier).

    Cole, if you come home and Tunchie is missing, it wasn’t me!

  139. 139.

    Steeplejack

    June 23, 2011 at 11:16 pm

    @asiangrrlMN:

    I knew you would be along to slake my GGD thirst. I just got home from work. How you doin’ tonight? Are you on some sort of weird schedule (weirder than usual)?

  140. 140.

    Triassic Sands

    June 24, 2011 at 12:10 am

    JSF — on the Intertubes the use of hyperbole is often mistaken for normal discussion. I overstated the case — considerably — on purpose. I was poking fun at Cole, who really does start a lot of the “brawls” here by the way he phrases his posts, particularly what I take to be the intentional use of ambiguous language.

    Whenever one uses irony, hyperbole, even simple sarcasm on the “tubes” there is a danger of misunderstanding. I suppose that’s one of the reasons emoticons and LOL came into being. For better or worse, I hate emoticons and most acronymese (so to speak), so I won’t telegraph my intent by using them.

    In fact, far from being dire, most of the fights/disagreements/whatevers that go on here are just plain silly. There are some genuinely unpleasant people, but most are OK people who just get revved up at their keyboards and get a little ridiculous.

  141. 141.

    Elie

    June 24, 2011 at 3:16 am

    Linda f @ 115:

    Yeah I googled myself (Hmmm — well, I was bored and it felt good — a little release)

    No seriously, I found out that I worked for a freakin Golf Course.. What the hey???

    Actually, its good to do that once in a while to see what comes up…

  142. 142.

    fuckwit

    June 24, 2011 at 4:00 am

    it’ll be like this:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WdCq4vv5QU8

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