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You are here: Home / Politics / Republican Stupidity / It’s Like a Two Year Dumb Off

It’s Like a Two Year Dumb Off

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I swear to FSM, what we have is not a Republican majority in the House, we have the contestants in a two year battle to see who is the dumbest. Today’s effort is from Louis Gohmert:

While a startling number of House Republicans refuse to accept experts’ dires warnings about the possibility of default come Aug. 2 if Congress doesn’t raise the debt ceiling, Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-TX) thinks he has stumbled across the Obama administration’s real motivation behind choosing that date. Many Republicans think the August date is a phony deadline Democrats invented to scare Congress into raising the ceiling, but Gohmert sees a more personal significance for President Obama — his 50th birthday on Aug. 4 and his birthday party on the 3rd.

    GOHMERT: And I can’t help but be a little bit cynical here. Because we find out the president has a big birthday bash scheduled for August the 3rd, celebrities flying in from all over. And lo and behold, August 2nd is the deadline for getting something done so he can have this massive, the biggest fundraising dinner in history for a birthday celebration. […] Isn’t that amazing? The timing of this?

The reason for the August 2nd deadline is pretty clear. It has nothing to do with the Preznit’s birthday, and everything to do with US RUNNING OUT OF MONEY:

Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner said Monday that he would start taking “extraordinary measures” this week to keep the country’s debt below its legal limit.

In a letter to Congress, he also said that he now estimates he can keep the country out of default until Aug. 2, three weeks later than he estimated last month.

Regardless, expect Gohmert’s line of thinking to take off with the teatard crowd.

Reader Interactions

89Comments

  2. 2.

    Zifnab

    We collect over two trillion in revenue and conduct over three and a half trillion in spending, and Gohmert thinks the lynch pin in the whole mess is a few hundred dollars for a birthday party.

    And folks wonder why we can’t balance a budget.

  3. 3.

    arguingwithsignposts

    Were a default to actually happen (FSM forbid), I would hope some of these fuckers would be considered for treason charges. Seriously, is there anything *less* patriotic than threatening the good faith and credit of the country?

  4. 4.

    sb

    I want to meet the people who voted for Gohmert. I want to know if they’re ashamed, ignorant of what he is saying or what have you. I mean this… this is just beyond ridiculous what he said.

  6. 6.

    Dennis SGMM

    @sb:

    I want to know if they’re ashamed, ignorant of what he is saying or what have you. I mean this… this is just beyond ridiculous what he said.

    You left out the word “proud.” That’s where my money would be.

  8. 8.

    Zifnab

    I want to meet the people who voted for Gohmert. I want to know if they’re ashamed, ignorant of what he is saying or what have you. I mean this… this is just beyond ridiculous what he said.

    Gohmert runs virtually unopposed every two years on a platform of “Incumbent Republican in Texas”. The Democrats don’t touch him because his district is too red, and no one else has the political capital to even try to face him. So he gets to say and do whatever he damn well pleases.

  11. 11.

    Violet

    Limbaugh has been going on about that date for some time now. He mentions Obama’s birthday. And then he mentions it coincides with the start of Ramadan.

  12. 12.

    jl

    If Obama thinks like Gohmert does, two days after the world financial system starts blowing up is the perfect time to ask wealthy people to make big contributions.

  13. 13.

    Washington Post Editorial Board

    Can we also agree that if there’s a default, maybe the President should cancel the birthday party?

    Assuming the part about the birthday party is even true.

  15. 15.

    Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)

    the president has a big birthday bash scheduled for August the 3rd, celebrities flying in from all over.

    Will Cole be doing the cooking for this birthday bash?

  16. 16.

    jo6pac

    If there was any thought that Amerika education wasn’t being dumbed down just check this repug and the voters in his area.

    jl Yep

  17. 17.

    Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)

    the president has a big birthday bash scheduled for August the 3rd, celebrities flying in from all over.

    Page Six reports Tunch is flying in to attend. Obot.

  18. 18.

    dr. bloor

    we have the contestants in a two year battle to see who is the dumbest

    I don’t know that you can really frame it as a competition per se, when the participants are just doing what comes naturally to them.

  19. 19.

    General Stuck

    That’s better than blaming it on anchor terror babies being trained by government nannies

  20. 20.

    Martin

    August 2 is also the day the Declaration of Independence was signed. Also the day Hitler became Fuhrer of Germany. How could have have overlooked both teatarding the event and Godwinning it at the same time?

  22. 22.

    Chat Noir

    Were a default to actually happen (FSM forbid), I would hope some of these fuckers would be considered for treason charges. Seriously, is there anything less patriotic than threatening the good faith and credit of the country?

    I agree with you, AWS; what these people are doing is treasonous. This whole debt ceiling debate and potential catastrophe has me seriously worried.

  23. 23.

    Martin

    Assuming the part about the birthday party is even true.

    Are we talking about his Kenyan birthday, or his Hawaiian ‘birthday’?

  24. 24.

    Dennis SGMM

    @Redshift:

    Anyone else remember when S.I. Hayakawa was beating the “English Only” drum? It’s sadly ironic that the same conservative movement that loved Hayakawa’s jeremiads has laden so many words and phrases with double meanings that it won’t be long before only they will be able to understand what they’re really saying.

    Soon the following scene will play out in a Red State restaurant:

    Yankee Customer: I’ll have a hamburger, please.
    Waiter: I’m gonna’ kill yew for that yew sumbitch!

  25. 25.

    Martin

    @Dennis SGMM:

    Yeah, I think it’s fitting that the GOP would be the ones to actually implement Newspeak.

  26. 26.

    Loneoak

    Are we talking about his Kenyan birthday, or his Hawaiian ‘birthday’?

    Or his Malcolm X-love-child ‘birfday’?

  27. 27.

    Lolis

    OT: The Senate just confirmed the first openly gay federal judge. ThinkProgress has the news.

  28. 28.

    priscianusjr

    You just don’t get it, do you? Obama’s parents used the rhythm method to work it out so that he would be born (in Kenya, where else?) two days AFTER the day when, in 2011, the USA would run out of money. That would allow Obama to celebrate his birthday AND America’s running out of money simultaneously, in order to replace the US Constitution with Shariah Law.

  29. 29.

    RalfW

    Washington Post Editorial Board @13:

    I can’t believe the Prezidon’t watched Soccer on TV with his family the other night. So much time wasted when he should have been planning his mooslem Kenyan birthday dance on the grave of capitalism.

  30. 30.

    Violet

    @Loneoak:
    Maybe he’s like the Queen. She’s got her real birthday and then her Official Birthday. So maybe he’s just celebrating his Official Birthday, since he can’t tell us when his real one is.

  31. 31.

    danimal

    In the Dumb-Off, do contestants acquire points cumulatively, or is the contest won by the Representative who says/does the stupidest thing as a unique event?

    By itself, this dumbassery by Gohmert probably doesn’t get him in the top 3, but if previous history is included, he is a very strong contender.

  33. 33.

    Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)

    The Senate just confirmed the first openly gay federal judge.

    Obama is such a homophobe.

  34. 34.

    Citizen_X

    a two year battle to see who is the dumbest

    Yeah, but Gohmert is always at the top of the standings in that one.

  35. 35.

    t jasper parnell

    Obama’s inability to remember that his birthday is August 4, according to the always accurate WND, is evidence of his being an alien in all senses of the word. It’s like the right can’t keep its lies straight so many have they told.

  36. 36.

    John Puma

    Louie, there is NO problem with your little bit of cynicism-heck a lot of cynicism is acceptable.

    The problem is your repeatedly proving that we have “serving” in the United States of America House of Representative, a least one person, with an intelligence lower than a sack of half-rotten turnips.

  37. 37.

    Thoughtcrime

    Perhaps it’s to prevent the international financial markets from going poof in a mushroom cloud on August 6th?

  38. 38.

    gnomedad

    And I can’t help but be a little bit cynical here.

    The dumb shit Republicans “can’t help” saying could fill a library.

  40. 40.

    priscianusjr

    @Dennis SGMM

    Yankee Customer: I’ll have a hamburger, please.
    Waiter: I’m gonna’ kill yew for that yew sumbitch!

    Or, as Bluto once said to Popeye:
    “I want a good hamburger, and I want it bad!”

  41. 41.

    RalfW

    I still vote for Joe “BP-blowjob” Barton’s cornering of Steven Chu into being utterly baffled when Joe-Blow makes him explain the impossible idea that oil (from palm trees!) is under Alaska.

    And then placing that awesome “gotcha” video right there on the Congressman’s home page, having NO IDEA WHATSOEVER that Joe “Head-Bob” Barton looked supider than all hell.

    Hilarity!

  42. 42.

    Raenelle

    Gohmert doesn’t know the half of it. The deadline is 8/2. Subtract 2 from 8 = 6. This is Obama’s 3rd year as President. So, 666. See. See. 666.

  43. 43.

    Corner Stone

    @MattR:

    I just appreciate that he didn’t blame it on my mom’s birthday.

    Doesn’t she have enough to answer for already, MattR? I mean, doesn’t she?

  48. 48.

    Corner Stone

    @Dennis SGMM:

    Yankee Customer: I’ll have a hamburger, please.
    Waiter: I’m gonna’ kill yew for that yew sumbitch!

    You pretty much justified their fate when you labeled them a “Yankee Customer”.

  51. 51.

    Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)

    speaking of gays and celebrities, does Oprah ping anyone’s radar?

    She’s never pinged my radar, but my lesbian friends love her, in part because they’re sure she’s part of the team.

    And I ask as an OBot who will always love Oprah, if for nothing else, for securing Obama’s win in Iowa.

  53. 53.

    middlewest

    @MomSense

    Except immunologists. They’re probably going to name a new strain of measles after her.

  55. 55.

    Uncle Clarence Thomas

    .
    .
    I don’t want to overly excite anyone, but even the President of the United States sometimes must have to stand naked.
    .
    .

  57. 57.

    harlana (meaning, she who holds the popcorn)

    Why do we care about them, the teatards. They need to be ignored.

    (munches popcorn watches the cable pr0n)

  58. 58.

    boatboy_srq

    @danimal

    There are iron pyrite, pewter and tin medals for the individual single-stupidity events, plus an overall “Wurst of Show,” plus the “People’s Choice” lucite plaque for the most entertaining.

    Special mention to the one who coupon-clips the most KJV OT verses and tries to paste them into public policy statements.

  59. 59.

    arguingwithsignposts

    @harlana (meaning, she who holds the popcorn):

    Why do we care about them, the teatards. They need to be ignored.

    Because even though Tweety called Grover Fucking Norquist on his bullshit, GFN has more power among the teatards thanks to his treasonous “pledge” than anyone else – and they happen to hold a sizable number of votes in the house AND senate atm. And Grover Fucking Norquist isn’t about to “negotiate.” period. He said as much during the Minnesota shutdown.

  61. 61.

    harlana (meaning, she who holds the popcorn)

    arguingwithsignposts : you might want to re-read my comment:D

  62. 62.

    arguingwithsignposts

    @harlana (meaning, she who holds the popcorn): Sneaky. :D

    ETA: Grover Fucking Norquist is just about the worst person in this whole mess, and he brings out a particular strain of anger in me. He really is a sick, evil operator who doesn’t give a whit about the majority of americans’ lives. If there would be one silver lining to a default, it would be that Grover Fucking Norquist would (hopefully) lose all his wealth and influence.

  64. 64.

    gnomedad

    @Redshift:

    And soon after that, “birthday party” will be yet another incomprehensible wingnut code word. Sigh.

    Does your wife have birthday parties? Know what I mean, nudge, nudge?

  65. 65.

    Jeffro

    The question is, can we count Herman Cain in as a contestant?

    Millions of mosque-goers would like to know a.s.a.p.

  66. 66.

    PreservedKillick

    I am really somewhat shocked that Obama has not laid out – in detail – exactly what happens on 7/2. What does not get paid. What gets paid. Why. At a high level. Maybe with a spreadsheet so people can play with the numbers.

    Then, toss the mess over to the house and say “if you would like to comment, please do. I would prefer that you do your job.”

    I would really like to see the reaction on Main Street. Because it is not – is NOT – going to be pretty, and the pain is not – is NOT – going to be evenly spread. The same people screaming for a default live in states most dependent on the federal handout.

  67. 67.

    Corner Stone

    @PreservedKillick:

    I am really somewhat shocked that Obama has not laid out – in detail – exactly what happens on 7/2.

    I could be wrong but I think a lot of people were preparing for their July 4th parties.

  70. 70.

    Jeffro

    O/T, sort of: what if there are R’s and their benefactors who have already ‘shorted’ bonds and other investments, i.e., are counting on a default of some sort in order to make a killing?

    (Or the reverse: NEED a default in order to avoid being wiped out??)

  71. 71.

    JPL

    A friend who lives in GA heard today that folks won’t receive Soc. Sec because the Obama’s travel to much. WTF

  72. 72.

    Davis X. Machina

    @Jeffro: They’re in the position of the tall guy in a flood — he gets to go through all the victim’s pockets, and drowns last — but still drowns.

  73. 73.

    jwb

    Jeffro: As I understand it, you’d see that sort of systemic shorting in the future’s spread. In any case, the real money is likely to be made after the carnage, when a lot of things will be misvalued due to panic.

  76. 76.

    Jeffro

    jwb – ‘misvalued’ = ‘undervalued’? I’ve heard that theory, that well-off people and corporations with tons of cash could really jump in and snap up undervalued/’crashed’ stocks, etc if/once a default happens. I imagine there are always people like that (and it certainly helps if you have a pile of money waiting to jump on such opportunities)

    I’m just wondering what part of this insane insistence on delaying raising the ceiling is due to those who think they can make a killing shorting stocks, picking through the wreckage on the cheap, and every other angle they can find…and may even have ‘skin in the game’ at this point to make that happen.

  77. 77.

    joeshabadoo

    I’m starting to think this is an elaborate plan to ruin Obama’s birthday party.

    If they don’t raise the ceiling it has to be canceled or it will look terrible. Obama can’t have a big party while he’s can’t pay SS checks and closes government offices. Meanwhile Republicans get to cackle with glee that the president has to endure a minor inconvenience while they are out on the street.

  79. 79.

    PeakVT

    @Jeffro: There probably are some plutocrats and their elected tools who are betting on a collapse, but not everybody, or even most people, can be short. And people like the Cochs have most of their wealth in non-liquid assets like oil refineries.

  81. 81.

    Caz

    So your latest contribution to the blogosphere is “I predict that the tea party will start asserting that Obama picked the debt ceiling deadline to coincide with his birthday.”??

    Headline: John Cole’s irrelevant post streak extended. Dimaggio who??

    I hope you will keep us posted on tea party birthday comments. Don’t just throw it out there and then ignore it – we want to see how accurate your prediction is, lol.

  82. 82.

    4jkb4ia

    @81 : Sarcasm is a core feature of the Internet.

    (Loose Krugman: “For those who missed it, Cole was being sarcastic”)

  83. 83.

    TenguPhule

    And Grover Fucking Norquist isn’t about to “negotiate.” period.

    To reopen Negotiations, Obama should have Grover dragged off by the SS, then on the steps of capital hill, cap his ass on live tv with a magnum. Then coolly announce to the Speaker of the House “Time to get serious, Bit*hes”

  84. 84.

    TenguPhule

    What does not get paid. What gets paid. Why. At a high level. Maybe with a spreadsheet so people can play with the numbers.

    Because scarily enough, they honestly don’t know.

    This one was never planned for, our government is prepared for aliens landing, dinosaurs and zombies rising but not the terminal weapons grade stupidity of the Teabaggers.

    The best guess is that it would be utter chaos.

    Worst case? Martial Law and rioting.

  85. 85.

    Yutsano

    @TenguPhule: I’ve already been told I’m working. For free. Until they stop being idiots. Only because if it wasn’t because of what I do we’d be even more broke than we are.

  86. 86.

    TenguPhule

    I’ve already been told I’m working. For free. Until they stop being idiots.

    Ouch. /I’d normally make a piss poor joke about Soup Kitchens and Food Stamps here, but I’ve been there so I won’t.

  87. 87.

    Yutsano

    @TenguPhule: Ahh go for it. At this point cheap humor and YouTube is about all I got. I do fortunately have a decent savings cushion stashed away. Which won’t be worth shit after this is all done.

  88. 88.

    bob h

    The majority of the nutters come from Red States which are parasites when it comes to Federal funding-they get a lot more than they put in. They benefit most from the spending, yet want to kill it the most. Truly nuts.

  89. 89.

    JR

    I hear research shows that 70% of social program recipients don’t know or believe that their assistance comes from the government!

    I guess they all think it comes from the Sugar Fairy!!

    What ever will they think if the teatards shut down the government and their USDA Foodstamp Card goes dead at the grocery store?

    They’ll blame liberals and President Obama, somehow.

    And one more thing? When will the spell checkers learn to spell the President’s name? It’s been 4 years since he started running for FSM’s sake!?!

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