Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Anyone who bans teaching American history has no right to shape America’s future.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires republicans to act in good faith.

Let us savor the impending downfall of lawless scoundrels who richly deserve the trouble barreling their way.

Tick tock motherfuckers!

The republican caucus is already covering themselves with something, and it’s not glory.

Balloon Juice has never been a refuge for the linguistically delicate.

JFC, are there no editors left at that goddamn rag?

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

Thanks to your bullshit, we are now under siege.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

The party of Reagan has become the party of Putin.

Pessimism assures that nothing of any importance will change.

Roe isn’t about choice, it’s about freedom.

This fight is for everything.

Whoever he was, that guy was nuts.

Prediction: the GOP will rethink its strategy of boycotting future committees.

The poor and middle-class pay taxes, the rich pay accountants, the wealthy pay politicians.

Sitting here in limbo waiting for the dice to roll

Speaking of republicans, is there a way for a political party to declare intellectual bankruptcy?

Let’s delete this post and never speak of this again.

Conservatism: there are some people the law protects but does not bind and others who the law binds but does not protect.

A sufficient plurality of insane, greedy people can tank any democratic system ever devised, apparently.

You can’t attract Republican voters. You can only out organize them.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Notes from the Uterati

Reader Interactions

120Comments

  2. 2.

    Mattminus

    Let’s be serious. No senator would bang that chick. The sign would be a lot more effective if it was held by someone that looked less like a chunky Jermaine Jackson.

  3. 3.

    chopper

    on the other hand, you can’t spell ‘uterus’ without US! think about that one!

  4. 4.

    fasteddie9318

    Chris Lee says, “Hello!”

    …Chris Lee was into, um, girls who didn’t actually have vagines, no? Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

  5. 5.

    Trollenschlongen

    I love that the brown girl is all, “RAAAAAAAAWWR!” and the white girl is all, “Um… hi, mom! My friend’s kinda pissed lol!”

    Your comment on the photo is racist and deals in stereotypes. There are probably, just maybe, brown girls who are a little shy and white girls who are all in one’s face. Just maybe.

  10. 10.

    Mnemosyne

    There are probably, just maybe, brown girls who are a little shy and white girls who are all in one’s face.

    So you’re saying we shouldn’t believe our lying eyes and the photo really shows a white girl who’s being all “RAWRRR” and a black girl who’s a little shy? How did you receive this secret knowledge, pray tell?

  11. 11.

    jl

    Identifying the U.S. with the U.S. Senate is insulting to the U.S., and therefore uncivil.

    And putting the F word in pink might be considered sexist against men.

    Other than those two minor quibbles, looks like those two know how to demonstrate.

  12. 12.

    Jude

    Sweet fucking christ. I had assumed that this post wouldn’t draw the usual trolls, but there’s fucking Mattminus AT NUMBER FUCKING TWO to prove me wrong.

    Thanks, dickhole.

  13. 13.

    fasteddie9318

    I can’t wait to see what the next 388 posts in this thread will be upset about.

  14. 14.

    Craig

    @ Mnemosyne:

    Maybe the black girl is yawning and the white girl’s left hand, off-camera, is drowning a guy in a Confederate flag trucker hat in a port-a-john.

  15. 15.

    Roger Moore

    @Mattminus:

    No senator would bang that chick.

    I’m pretty sure there are some Senators who would happily screw anyone with a vagina. Some of them might not be so set on the “with a vagina” part, either.

  16. 16.

    Paul in KY

    Trollenschlongen that was some weak trolling. Like you had to think for about 3 or 4 mins before you could come up with an anti-ABL whine.

    I thought it was a pretty funny line & generally true also (from what I’ve observed over the years).

  18. 18.

    Ivan Ivanovich Renko

    I think they’re both pretty hot. And check it out– every single word on the sign is spelled correctly!!

    I love women with brains. They scare the shit out of conservatives.

  21. 21.

    Guster

    @16 I think they’re both pretty hot.

    As Louis CK might said, Neither of them would fuck me, so fuck them!

    And goddamn, when will ABL stop with this endless overwriting??????

    (You’re a mindless Obamabot robot, ABL, but your descrption of this picture, and the Shakespeare stuff yesterday–brilliant. Thanks.)

  22. 22.

    Jason Bylinowski

    What is it with these terrible trolls in the past year on this site? Quality trolls make a quality forum. Seriously, I wouldn’t do without at least one asshole subtly comparing democratic domestic policy to the Khmer Rouge but this shit is bush league, guys.

  24. 24.

    gwangung

    As Louis CK might said, Neither of them would fuck me, so fuck them!

    This comes so close to truth that I’m not going to comment on it.

  26. 26.

    daveNYC

    This comment thread is too depressing, I’m going back to the Norway terror post.

  28. 28.

    jl

    @23 the shade of pink for the f word does clash with most standard office color schemes.

    I agree completely. ABL should be more careful.

  32. 32.

    AnnaN

    Mattminus is waiting for all the females to scream at him so he can then label his vocal opponents as fat two baggers.

    Which means he’s a troll with the originality and wit of a 12 year old circa 1985.

    That’s a little depressing. And it’s hot here. I need a mojito served by Sam Axe. That would make things better.

  34. 34.

    kc

    My sign says “If I wanted to fuck Mattminus I’d be hanging out in a men’s restroom!”

  35. 35.

    Trollenschlongen

    I thought it was a pretty funny line & generally true also (from what I’ve observed over the years).

    Nice to know you peddle stereotypes and racism.

  36. 36.

    Marshal T

    Why does this website have to have silly race-baiting blog post-lets?

    Or am I missing something? I might be.

  37. 37.

    Trollenschlongen

    WTF? 20+ comments in and no one has tried their hand at “White people are like this, black people are like this“?

    Idiot. ABL did that in the post itself, her comment on the picture, paraphrased, is “I love that this photo confirms my prejudice that brown girls are aggressive and in your face, and white girls and shy and retiring.”

    Keep up.

  38. 38.

    Chyron HR

    ABL did that in the post itself, her comment on the picture, paraphrased

    When you’re itching for a fight, but nobody’s actually said anything objectionable, nothing hits the spot like a good old fashioned paraphrasing!

  39. 39.

    Trollenschlongen

    but nobody’s actually said anything objectionable,

    so you honestly don’t think ABL’s photo comment is racist stereotyping?

    Or do you just believe that racist stereotyping is ok when ABL does it?

  41. 41.

    Catsy

    @Mattminus:

    Let’s be serious. No senator would bang that chick. The sign would be a lot more effective if it was held by someone that looked less like a chunky Jermaine Jackson.

    Congratulations on your runaway victory in the “douchebag of the day” competition.

    I think they’re damn cute personally, but whatever gets you through the day.

  42. 42.

    ABL

    @Paul in KY: After ABL’s whine about the Doritos Super Bowl ad, Trollenscholgen’s comment it not too far off the mark.

    my whine, and the “whine” of many other people of color.

    you’ve got a little privilege in your eye, as you always do on my posts. and since you’re utterly boring, i’m adding you to the gang of the ABL Deranged and Pied. it’s a small but prestigious group.

    look for trollenidiot when you get there.

    ::winks::

  45. 45.

    Catsy

    @Trollenschlongen:

    so you honestly don’t think ABL’s photo comment is racist stereotyping?

    I think what ABL wrote would be equally true if their skin colors were reversed. It was a humorous but accurate description of what each of the girls was doing.

    You’re the one trying to turn it into a blanket statement. And in the process, living up to your username more than usual, albeit with some pretty weak trolling.

  46. 46.

    lacp

    But, ABL, if your comment is paraphrased, it’s a loaded racist stereotype! Just like if I had four legs I’d be a centaur.

  47. 47.

    ABL

    so you honestly don’t think ABL’s photo comment is racist stereotyping?

    oh seriously? that’s what timmeh the interrupted one is on about?

    hahahaha.

    my god, you need to get a life, son.

  48. 48.

    MattR

    @ABL: The issue has nothing to do with whether I view your comments about the Doritos commercial as whining. It has to do with the contradiction between your reaction to that commercial and your comments about the picture in this post.

    (EDIT: Had you simply posted the picture in the post and then I posted your exact words as a comment, at least one person would have called me out.)

  49. 49.

    ABL

    MattR – July 22, 2011 | 3:38 pm · Link

    I’m not really sure why I like pies so much. The roundness? The delicious crust? I dunno, man, I dunno.

    i dunno either.

    Off to lunch! Have fun trolling the castle!

  50. 50.

    jl

    I guess ABL should have ID’d them by hair color.

    But, prolly that would be worse. It would be a hidden racial subtext, don’t you know.

    Some commenters say silly things.

  51. 51.

    Mark S.

    I’m still really upset about a comment ABL made about a Geico commercial last year. It was really geckoist.

  52. 52.

    MattR

    @ABL: Hey. If you want your posts to be filled with people pointing out your contradictions and then you leaving them unchallenged, that is your business. But I have to wonder the effect it has on everyone else reading your posts.

    I have been tempted by quite a few users but I don’t believe in the pie filter for that reason (and because you cannot challenge lies and errors of posters if you can’t see them). If a barb is worthy of a response, then I want to be able to see it so I can make that response. If it is not worthy, I simply ignore it and keep reading.

  55. 55.

    AnnaN

    Would it still be a stereotype if it were Right Chick vs. Left Chick? Still too stereotypical? How about if we say, “mirror imaging makes the black chick the Right Chick”?

    Too partisan?

    I’m thinking one just needs a good ol’ personality disorder to recognize these things.

    @lacp
    Or a unicorn, even. Too.

  56. 56.

    steve

    Craig – July 22, 2011 | 2:29 pm · Link
    @ Mnemosyne:
    Maybe the black girl is yawning and the white girl’s left hand, off-camera, is drowning a guy in a Confederate flag trucker hat in a port-a-john.

    goddam, that was funny.

  57. 57.

    Felinious Wench

    @MattR:

    If you want your posts to be filled with people pointing out your contradictions and then you leaving them unchallenged, that is your business.

    You (and others) have the same obsession with ABL that M_C/Murbella/Nom De Jour has with EDKain.

  59. 59.

    General Stuck

    Also giving Uncle Clarence Thomas a time out.

    speeding ticket at the Indy 500.

  60. 60.

    Ol' Dirty DougJ

    For any MC in any 52 states,
    I gets psycho killer Norman Bates

    Gimme the mic so I can take it away.

  61. 61.

    Ol' Dirty DougJ

    I’m not going to repeat Uncle Clarence Thomas’s comment, but it was creepy and not something I want on this blog.

  63. 63.

    Uncle Clarence Thomas

    .
    .
    @53 Ol’ Dirty DougJ

    Also giving Uncle Clarence Thomas a time out.

    For what reason? I didn’t insult anyone.
    .
    .

  64. 64.

    MattR

    @Felinious Wench: My last complaint with ABL was her calling Aaron Swartz a grifter for attempting to hack into JSTOR when all accounts indicate that Swartz is a huge advocate of open intellectual property. When challenged she never responded. Was my behavior unreasonable there?

    FWIW – I think my other recent complaint on this site was to John about the use of mother and father instead of two parents. I criticize those who say stupid and/or contradictory things without regard for who posts them. If ABL does that more than others, that is not my fault. No more than it is any of our faults that reality has a left wing bias.

  72. 72.

    Uncle Clarence Thomas

    .
    .
    @65 Mark S.

    Balloonbaggers can personally wish me to Die In A Fire and that’s perfectly fine, totally blog-worthy, and not “creepy.” Making a humorous sexual observation based upon the photo used by ABL, and insulting or threatening no one – that is deemed “creepy,” and results in censorship. They should be ashamed of themselves, but will not be.
    .
    .

  73. 73.

    Jason Bylinowski

    I do agree with whoever above me said they don’t agree with the pie filter. It’s pretty lame. No offense to cleek of course, who earns an A for scripting effort. I just think it fucks with the incoherence of the comments when certain people are invisible to each other. Not to mention that words never hurt you unless you let them.

  75. 75.

    Trollenschlongen

    I’m not going to repeat Uncle Clarence Thomas’s comment, but it was creepy and not something I want on this blog.

    Oh good god, such selectively delicate sensitivities on display today.

  76. 76.

    Bruce S

    Trollenschlongen – July 22, 2011 | 2:23 pm · Link

    I love that the brown girl is all, “RAAAAAAAAWWR!” and the white girl is all, “Um… hi, mom! My friend’s kinda pissed lol!”

    Your comment on the photo is racist and deals in stereotypes.

    Oh good lord. While we’re at it, let’s put out a contract on Chris Rock! I clearly don’t have a “my side” in these ABL threads. Actually, that’s not a complaint but a sigh of relief…

    Incidentally, my only criticism of the picture (or the quip) is that banging a US Senator doesn’t make you more “USAer” than anyone else…

  77. 77.

    13th Generation

    @Jason Bylinowski

    Yeah, but it makes the juiceboxer echo chamber so much nicer when you don’t have to read what all those dirty leftists have to say.

  79. 79.

    Catsy

    @Jason Bylinowski:

    I just think it fucks with the incoherence of the comments when certain people are invisible to each other.

    This makes no logical sense whatsoever. How is using a pie filter functionally different–from the perspective of any commenter on the site other than the person using it–compared to simply ignoring the comments? Unless they disclose their use of the filter, how could anyone possibly tell whether they’re not responding to Person A because they don’t want to, or because the person is pied?

  82. 82.

    TooManyJens

    @Jason Bylinowski:

    I just think it fucks with the incoherence of the comments when certain people are invisible to each other.

    Nothing coherent about m_c and Uncle Clarence Thomas and the rest of the trolls. To me, threads made a hell of a lot more coherent sense when I’m *not* reading them.

  83. 83.

    Steve

    Balloonbaggers can personally wish me to Die In A Fire and that’s perfectly fine, totally blog-worthy, and not “creepy.”

    This, for sure.

    Making a humorous sexual observation based upon the photo used by ABL, and insulting or threatening no one – that is deemed “creepy,” and results in censorship.

    I count at least three falsehoods in this sentence! Good times.

  84. 84.

    kindness

    Hey, can someone post an open thread so that we can all bitch about the ‘deal’ that President Obama agreed to?

    Maybe we shouldn’t be so quick to bag on the FDL people…they might be right on this one.

  85. 85.

    freelancer

    @Catsy:

    You see it’s not until you open the box that the wave function collapses, and so unobserved, with the lid still on the box, the cat can literally be thought of as simultaneously alive and dead!

  86. 86.

    Emily L. Hauser/ellaesther

    Oh lord, just when I think it might be a nice idea to come back to this merry gang of misfits, and I dip a toe in, and scroll through a few comments — I discover such levels of sheer brain-dead moronitude, flung like poop from some other monkey’s butt, that I scuttle away again.

    Honest to FSM. What is wrong with people. Pick up your damn hobo sticks and hit the road already!

    :: throws up hands ::

  87. 87.

    Brandon

    With mass murder in Norway and global financial collapse imminent, I love that we have a raging flamewar emanating from an ABL post that is tantamount to “white guys drive a car like this… and black guys drive a car like this….”

    No need to give me a timeout DougJ, I’m going to take one voluntarily.

  88. 88.

    Jamey: Bike Commuter of the Gods

    I think the sign is stupid, but at least it’s spelled correctly. So there’s that…

    But, what?! The Rawrrrr chick is, like, all rawrrrr, so ABL is just telling it like it is.

  91. 91.

    boss bitch

    Two young women who are politically involved and aware of how their privacy is being invaded and the thread devolves into these dumb ass comments?

  92. 92.

    asiangrrlMN

    An the Asian chick is invisible to the left (the LEFT!) with the rice and the chopsticks, ready to feed the other two!

    Humor. We all should try it sometimes.

    @MattR: Well, yes. Because you’re not a black woman. It’s why I can make the above joke and get away with it, but, depending on context, it would raise an eyebrow if, say, a white male said it. There really are somethings that a person of color can say and joke about that you and other white people would best not say.

    As I like to say, it’s one of the few perks of being Asian. I get to make as many Asian jokes as I like!

    ETA: Great sign, btw.

  94. 94.

    Trollenschlongen

    Two young women who are politically involved and aware of how their privacy is being invaded and the thread devolves into these dumb ass comments?

    Well, sure, because ABL chose to make it about racial stereotypes right in the post. She didn’t say the “kickass young woman on the left” or the “friendly young woman on the right,” she made it all about their skin colors and her own, race-based assumptions about why each is behaving they way they are. She sees them as racial archetypes, not individuals.

    Can’t imagine why you’d be ok with that.

  95. 95.

    gwangung

    Two young women who are politically involved and aware of how their privacy is being invaded and the thread devolves into these dumb ass comments?

    Typical ABL DS.

  96. 96.

    MattR

    @asiangrrlMN: I do understand that and I actually have no problem with what she said, per se. But I do also think it is stupid and contradictory to complain about a commercial (before knowing the race or sex of the people who created and submitted it to Doritos as part of a contest) that depicts a black wife as angry and violent (because white wives are never protrayed that way which reinforces a racial stereotype) and then to make the comment above which reinforces a similar stereotype.

  99. 99.

    Uncle Clarence Thomas

    .
    .
    @83 Steve

    This, for sure.

    Thank you for demonstrating the truth of my assertions.

    I count at least three falsehoods in this sentence!

    That is a lie, Steve. If you wish, you may attempt to prove anything in my sentence to be untrue, and I will rebut your falsehoods on a no-fee basis.
    .
    .

  100. 100.

    Dr. Squid

    @Trollenschlongen: Someone is showing prejudice, and it ain’t ABL. Hint: assuming prejudice without evidence is evidence of your own prejudice, racist fuckstick.

  103. 103.

    Jules

    Jesus people, sometimes it is just easier to say “the black girl is all and the white girls is”….

    Awesome picture.
    Fuck conservatives.

  104. 104.

    fasteddie9318

    Come on, only 300 more posts filled with inexplicable outrage and completely misdirected anger to go!

  106. 106.

    Brad

    Unfortunately for those who want the U.S in their uteri, that service has been outsourced to Twitter. Talk about a decline in constituent service!

  108. 108.

    Trollenschlongen

    Hint: assuming prejudice without evidence is evidence of your own prejudice, racist fuckstick.

    Why are you talking about ABL in this manner? I am not she.

  109. 109.

    Trollenschlongen

    For the life of me, I can’t figure out why anyone thinks what ABL said was offensive in any way. I guess that makes me the real racist.

    Keep up. It’s offensive because ABL is a complete hypocrite, constantly calling others out for perceived racist innuendo which she then turns around and employs herself.

    It’s not hard to understand.

    And yes, you are a little bit racist. Everyone is.

  110. 110.

    Dr. Squid

    @Trollenschlongen: IKYABWAI as a trolling technique was lame before the Empire of Meow shredded the Harvard weenies.

  113. 113.

    harlana

    As an avid pie lover, I’m beginning to resent all this pie snark. Come on, respect the pie, people.

  114. 114.

    Scott

    ABL, no one knows how to get the better of castrated suburban white male anonymous trolls like you. Keep on.

  115. 115.

    Paul in KY

    MattR, didn’t see/read ABL’s Dorito comments. If you could link to them, I would read & then give my opinion (for anyone who cared).

  118. 118.

    billy rae valentine

    i’m late and someone probably pointed this out, but i just assumed that ABL was just using adjectives to differentiate the two ladies.

    she perhaps should/could have said “the girl on the left” and the “girl on the right”. then you’d be ok, right? for some people, the first/easiest thing to use is skin color. it’s not a big deal.

    but if you already hate ABL then i guess you can make it a big deal. but i think you made an incorrect assumption about her meaning. imo.

  119. 119.

    Trollenschlongen

    As an avid pie lover, I’m beginning to resent all this pie snark. Come on, respect the pie, people.

    It is telling how eager the alleged “pie filter” users are to let the rest of us know that they are using it…allegedly.

  120. 120.

    Older

    I think it’s a pretty cute picture and if either of them was my daughter (and hey, they both could be) I’d want to have a copy.

Comments are closed.