This is what August needed:
After a more than two-month hiatus, former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin is planning to crash the presidential party once again with a heartland-themed re-launch of her “One Nation” bus tour this week in Iowa, according to a Palin fundraising email obtained by CNN.
Palin is bringing her Constitution-draped bus to the Iowa State Fair, just 30 miles south of where the Republican presidential field will take the stage on Thursday for a presidential debate in Ames.
I doubt she makes it to Des Moines. Ceder Rapids is out of the question.
Trainrunner
She’s not going to be ignored, John.
lamh34
Like they say, Grifter are gonna grift!!
RossInDetroit
But I’ll bet it isn’t bringing her. She’ll fly in, wave at the fans and split before it gets boring.
Trainrunner
Also, I understand that she’s on a 50-state search for ONE of her children who actually waits until AFTER marriage to fuck around.
Wee Bey
CedAr Rapids, bucko.
JPL
Sarah is jealous because she is no longer the media darling…
BTW..Since Sam is almost two..should we have a birthday party?
I do believe that several of us were coaches yelling push..just push..xxxxx
The Dangerman
I wonder if Lowery is having the same problem of not knowing what to do with himself?
Unabogie
Hey, didn’t she claim she went home for “jury duty”? So wait, you means she was lying???
JPL
BTW..I hope she makes it to Cedar Rapids and if you have a chance watch the movie..
BGinCHI
She’s now a serious candidate for Miss Stupid Iowa, the state fair’s greatest honor (after Grand Champion Hog).
Larime the Gimp
I think you should poke Ben Smith with a stick some more. That was entertaining!
Psychobroad
@Trainrunner: I wouldn’t expect anyone to wait until marriage to fuck around. It would be nice if they could wait till marriage to get knocked up. As I tell my children (showing picture of pregnant teenager) THIS is the face of abstinence education!
Hunter Gathers
I hear by refudiate this attack on Sarah Palin’s religion. It is typical of liberal elites like John Cole to look down on someone who has a strong Christian faith like Governor Palin. No billion dollar negative campaigns designed to ‘kill’ fine upstanding Patriots like Governor Palin is going to help find the millions of unemployed Americans jobs, keep them in their homes or save Medicare. The policies of Barack Obama, championed by the likes of liberal elites like John Cole, have done nothing to alleviate the suffering that millions of Americans have suffered under Obama’s Depression. Governor Palin is going to campaign tirelessly, meeting and greeting millions of Americans, in order to defeat the sitting President and end the Depression that his policies have created.
dmsilev
@BGinCHI:
Maybe we can talk someone into sculpting a Sarah Palin bust out of butter.
MikeJ
You go where the marks are.
(btw, typo. Cedar, not Ceder.)
General Stuck
I normally have no interest in wingnut debates, but I think this election, or primary is going to set records for weird and unintentional humor.
LOL, Palin’s Constitution draped tour bus. Too bad her supporters can’t read.
BGinCHI
@dmsilev: Or they could sculpt her whole body…..
shortstop
Donations to the Life-Sized Rhinestone Crucifixes Fund must be down.
RossInDetroit
My step father, who doesn’t care a bit about politics, asked me 2 weeks ago where Sarah had been. I was taken aback and didn’t have an answer for him. She was everywhere for months, then disappeared. If he’s aware of her then she’s done a great job of reaching people. Whether general familiarity is a good thing for her electoral chances is open to question.
SiubhanDuinne
@JPL:
Yes! Haven’t seen anything from RedKitten, or seen any photos of SamKitten, in a LONG time!
And if I wasn’t posting comments saying “Push!” I was certainly thinking it and there in spirit two years ago.
Shorter me: thread needs moar SK.
arguingwithsignposts
I think we all now should know what that “jury duty” was all about: a new grandkid. I’ll leave you to Megan’s calculator to figure how that works.
MikeJ
@SiubhanDuinne: She was here for one comment four days ago.
And Another Thing...
@Wee Bey: win.
Cat Lady
Palins on the bus:
Family needs moar baubles
Iowans beware
Gex
There’s nothing she can offer the nutcases who will be deciding the Iowa caucuses that Bachmann can’t give them, only more so. And she’s from there, Minnesota is near there, and they lurve her.
I can’t decide if I hope there’s a crazy lady cat fight or if I’d prefer they don’t embarrass my gender.
S. cerevisiae
Trainrunner at #1 said it all.
Warren Terra
This is the bus tour she suddenly abandoned partway through a published schedule of stops last time? OK, then.
Little Boots
milk it, girl. milk it for all it’s worth. which is to say a buck twenty five. but hey, that’s something.
The Dangerman
@arguingwithsignposts:
Kyla Grace; a pretty name if pronounced conventionally, but I have to wonder if they pronounce the child’s first name with a long or short “i”.
srv
I like that the republican nutjobs on the stage will be fielding questions about Sarah and enjoying it like stabbing cornhusks into their eyes.
Jenny
She’s retracing Paul Revere’s ride through Iowa.
Keith
Jon Oliver just wet himself with the news of the bus making its triumphant return.
srv
Why do we keep calling her that? Shouldn’t that title be reserved for people who actually complete their terms?
Maybe “sub-Governor” or “fractional-Governor” be used?
Linnaeus
This woman really is shameless.
Little Boots
actually, I have to give Palin a tiny bit of credit. she’s got a good gig and she knows it. keep teasing, but never, never, never jump into the actual race. I think she’s just smart enough to not make that terrible mistake.
srv
And is this good news for John McCain? He hasn’t had much good news in awhile.
Southern Beale
I smell an EMMY!
Let’s see … they take the couple and drop them in Somalia? Mexico? France? Or worse … San Francisco? You gotta know it’s a fish-out-of-water thing….
Cat Lady
BTW, every picture of Piper scares me. That girl is either going to grow up to be a serial killer, or the avenging castrating angel of the far left. There will be no middle ground for That One.
Little Boots
@srv:
he hates the tea party (slap)
he loves the tea party (slap)
he hates the tea party (slap)
yeah, what can you do with that clown?
gbear
Yea, but to be honest, Cedar Rapids is out of the question for anybody.
WaterGirl
@Little Boots:
We had a word for that in high school, and my mother taught me never to be one.
Little Boots
and John, did you bring back the reply function? peace be upon you.
lacp
She probably feels she’s linking up with Beck’s Israelpalooza in Seder Rapids.
cleek
mmmmmmeeeeeeeeeeee
mmmmmmeeeeeeeeeeee
mmmmmmeeeeeeeeeeee!
it’s all about mmmmmmeeeeeeeeeeee!
Litlebritdifrnt
@SiubhanDuinne:
“breath Pond” that so reminds me of Doctor Who. “push, but only when she tells you” so much fun.
Davis X. Machina
@Southern Beale:
Only if that’s short for ’emesis’.
Little Boots
@WaterGirl:
unlike Bristol’s mom :)
Southern Beale
@Davis X. Machina:
Yeah maybe that’s an enema I smell, not an Emmy…
gbear
@Hunter Gathers:
That was good.
Sloegin
@srv: Half-Governor has a nice RPG ring to it. Maybe some floppy ears, chain mail bikini and a longbow.
JD Rhoades
@General Stuck:
As my wife puts it: “the only part of the constitution they seem to have read is the Second Amendment.”
Mike in NC
You just can’t keep a good sociopath down.
Warren Terra
@JD Rhoades:
Fixt.
Joseph Nobles
No, THIS is what August needed:
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/08/10/opinion/the-day-our-leaders-got-unstuck.html?_r=3&partner=rssnyt&emc=rss
Yes, it’s Mustache of Understanding. It’s true: I’m no longer in a world of hurt. I’m in a world of laughter. OK, now I’m hurting again.
Mark S.
@Jenny:
Ha!
Elisabeth
@arguingwithsignposts:
OMG! That comment thread is soooo full of win!
RossInDetroit
I have this comic. It was worth it.
So was this one.
Villago Delenda Est
@Joseph Nobles:
It is my sincere hope that the Moustache of Understanding’s broken body is found side by side with BoBo’s in some alley somewhere.
Little Boots
@Villago Delenda Est:
oh, just take their columns away, that should be sufficient.
Joseph Nobles
@Villago Delenda Est: I’m saying. He’s got all the political acumen of a Teletubbies parade, but none of the moral introspection.
themanintheguyfawkesmask
@Little Boots: First, they came for the pundits, and I said nothing, because I was not a blowhard villager who made up 800 words of shit twice a week …
Little Boots
@themanintheguyfawkesmask:
but we’re all pundits now! that’s what’s so awesome about the internet, and so terribly frightening.
gnomedad
Didn’t Track listen to Bristol?
themanintheguyfawkesmask
@Little Boots: But we cannot all rise to the heights of sublime bullshit that the likes of Friedman can and get *paid* for it.
Mark S.
@Joseph Nobles:
How the fuck would that happen? That’s some speed of light trading.
beltane
@Joseph Nobles: World of Laughter has a nice ring to it. The world could use more laughter right now. Has anyone stopped to consider that maybe Bobo, MoDo, Chunky Bobo, and the Moustache of Understanding are the NYT’s version of the comics section?
rikyrah
this was just hilarious.
hilarious.
she’s such a grifter.
Little Boots
@themanintheguyfawkesmask:
alas, who can? other than mythical cab drivers.
Joseph Nobles
@Mark S.: Some folks get their kicks stomping on a dream.
Redshift
@Unabogie:
Actually she said “even former governors get called up for jury duty”; she didn’t say she had gotten called up for jury duty. She probably figured someone might check, and thought she was being clever. It’s a testament to how low interest in her has fallen (or expectations of her truthfulness) that, as far as I know, no reporter or blogger even bothered to check.
Gin & Tonic
@Redshift: http://www.alaskadispatch.com/article/sarah-palin-no-jury-duty-june
Arclite
Honestly, I don’t see how anyone can take this woman seriously any longer.
Arclite
@The Dangerman: I’m sure Rich Lowry knows what to do with himself and this pic of Palin in her jogging outfit.
Little Boots
@Arclite:
wrestling fans and nascar obsessives can take anyone seriously.
MikeBoyScout
Ok, granted this is not well thought out,
…but what if “we” put together a prayer rally to the Spaghetti Monster and “prayed” to it for a continuation of Mooselini’s Tragical History Tour.
Do you think that she’d quit to avoid Old Testament comparisons of the ability of the Spaghetti Monster to deliver compared to Hairy Rick Perry’s call to his dog for magic?
Little Boots
I wonder if anyone actually pays any attention to the actual prayers. it seems like they just want to know it’s happening. so you could probably say anything up there and get a ton of amens … and votes.
El Cid
@Mark S.:
Because they would have the Knowledge that the Mustache had brought us Lexolive Paradise.
PeakVT
The Palin family seems to have lost their shame gene.
Hal
Wow. Just realized I hadn’t thought of her in at least a month.
beltane
@Little Boots: They pay attention to the prayers, but they’re also so stupid that as long as you mention Jesus enough times (with feeling) you could pretty much pray for a hailstorm of dildoes to fall out of the sky and they’d still be shrieking their Amens as they roll around on the floor in ecstasy.
Little Boots
@beltane:
weirdest porno movie ever.
Jeffro
@Joseph Nobles:
How does The Mustache not see that one side is right there with him, just as depicted in that column, and the other is suggesting they all order the tire rims and anthrax?
I mean, really now.
El Cid
@Warren Terra:
What? Are you forgetting the Tenth Amendment, the one about how the Confederacy was right?
It’s time for NEWT GINGRICH GOPSI: 10TH AMENDMENT VERY SPECIAL VICTIMS UNIT.
Newt Gingrich, yesterday, on how he will lead the GOP to victory by rallying Amurka to take back the Tenf Mendent (via Not Hair):
I remember how hard it was that George W. Bush Jr. had to fight in order to stop all those Republican moves to make him enforce the 10rd Anointment.
But of course when Obama stole the Presidency from the duly elected Supreme Court, he commenced to hundredify the federal government and steal every little last power that local government ever had, including Mayor Lu Who’s last ordinance to hang on the MERRY CHRISTMAS tree.
[Re-enactment: Newt to Self: “Frankly, I think, frankly, what I need to do, frankly, is to give the Teaballers a new incoherent totemic phrase to shout with overtones of Freedom Founderism and yet Stalinisitical intimidatorianism.”]
Jennifer
I think the Who said it best:
Bus, tragic bus
Davis X. Machina
Newt Gingrich: Refrigerator Politics Magnets™.
Hal
Newt is still in this race?
Little Boots
is the tea party just the reincarnation of the John Birch Society/Ku Klux Klan/angry southern bitches? it seems simplistic, but still? what exactly are they bitching about? they do not seriously care about the deficit, or they’d be hollering for tax increases and an end to war. what exactly are they truly bitching about?
can I get a duh!!!!!
MikeBoyScout
@84Jennifer:
You can’t have it!
beltane
Is Newt still in the race? He has more imaginary followers than all the rest of them put together. Doesn’t that make him a contender?
Little Boots
@beltane:
Tiffany’s a particular fan.
Chris
@El Cid:
And never mind that there’s a reason we keep moving more and more power away from the states… because as the world keeps shrinking, so does the list of problems that can be handled at the state and local levels. At this point, it’s a lot more appropriate to be worried about problems that are so big that even national governments can’t handle them alone (which, in this era of globalization, is an increasing problem).
As usual, the teabaggers are wasting their breath trying to rule in 2011 with a thought process that went obsolete in the nineteenth century.
@Hal:
It’s actually comforting that the idea came from him – should help discredit it at least a little, since the teabaggers aren’t too fond of him either. (Yesterday’s hero. BORING).
OGLiberal
At the moment this news was released, Mark Halperin excitedly posted “Here She Comes!” then quickly retreated to his study with a tube of Astroglide and that Newsweek with Sarah in short-shorts on the cover. A housekeeper reports hearing screams of “And now here I come, Governor!” from the study shortly afterwards.
Little Boots
you know, I can say a lot is wrong with Obama, but imagine having to pick a Republican candidate to be president.
seriously, think about it. who would you want to be president? think who’s rolling out of the clown car and pick one. try. I dare you.
Gin & Tonic
@OGLiberal: I’m headed for bed. That didn’t need to be the last thing I read.
Little Boots
@Gin & Tonic:
see? doesn’t need to be.
Chris
@Little Boots:
I’m betting there’s quite a few top Republicans who’re secretly glad that it was Obama and not one of theirs who weathered the last three years… and a few of them who would breathe a sigh of relief if he were to win in 2012.
OGLiberal
@Chris: “And never mind that there’s a reason we keep moving more and more power away from the states… because as the world keeps shrinking, so does the list of problems that can be handled at the state and local levels.”
Something our revered, small government, yeoman farmer founders couldn’t have imagined. Of course, while they didn’t anticipate exactly this they did know that times would change and our government would need to evolve. But then “change” and “evolution” are anathema to the tea bagger set.
Little Boots
@Chris:
quite a few.
good point. do sane republicans, and yeah, there are some, actually look at McCain or Palin or Mitt or, jesus god, Bachmann, and think, yeah, they would know what to do?
Violet
Looks like Rudy is more seriously looking at getting in the race, too.
The Republican primaries are going to be a scarily hilarious.
Ira-NY
In Iowa, to win the Republican caucus, Cedar Rapids is not as important as Orange City.
The Dutch Reformed will determine the winner of the Iowa Republican caucus. And, as a long time observer of the Dutch Reformed, I guarantee it not be Romney.
Little Boots
@Ira-NY:
didn’t he drop out already? it’ll be bachmann, won’t it?
El Cid
@Little Boots: I think it’s indeed a union, uh, I mean an amalgamation, no, whoops, let’s say a confederacy between the Bircherites, the World Anti-Communist League nuts, the formerly chic 1990s’ anti-WunWhirldGubmit militias, the Reaganite-updated heirs to the Southern segregationists, and the last group’s super-burrowing spinoff, the Talibangelicals. Organized at the behest of and funded by the most venally grab-everything-now super-rich, because they know the dopes were out there to do it.
No, they don’t care about deficits. They don’t care about plumbing, because they only need to call upon Moses-water. (Via Digby / thereisnospoon)
Stop all the gubmit bailouts of Big Potable!
Our nation’s problems began when all the liberals kept expanding the 19th century, instead of pledging themselves to remain faithful to the 18th when the Constushun was actually passed.
This means we need someone to lead us back to the enforcement of the 6th Century of the Constiplution.
WE DON’T NEED YER GOD-BLAM SECULAR AYLEETISS ‘INFRASEWER’ NO WAY.
[God chimed in, for His part, ‘You know, when I said I’d help those who helped themselves, I didn’t just mean the lunch buffet lines.’]
beltane
I was just going to ask about Rudy. The GOP slate of candidates was in need of a little New York
failflair. Can’t you just picture him with the wig and tights singing “God Bless America” in a trio with Bachmann and Palin? I think I’m going to have nightmares now.Little Boots
@El Cid:
I don’t like to say this about such godly people, but they are beyond salvation.
Chris
@OGLiberal:
I’d say they set the tone when they tossed out the Articles of Confederation and replaced them with the Constitution just a few years after winning independence. By the standards of their time, they went with big government, knowing exactly how bad small government would be.
Jay in Oregon
So Newt Gringrich has come up with a new scam for fleecing the flock?
Act now! With your $50 donation you’ll get your honorary Team Ten Trooper badge and a complimentary DVD copy of A City Upon a Hill.
(A $25 donation gets you two copies of A City Upon a Hill…)
OGLiberal
@Violet: “Looks like Rudy is more seriously looking at getting in the race, too.”
Thank god! The race so far has been seriously deficient in terms of 9/11 references.
I think Rudy is banking on riding the wave of national approval for gay marriage – “Hey, I dressed in drag and lived with a couple of gay dudes. Also, 9/11.”
Little Boots
@Chris:
they claim to love history, and the founding era, but that would really be a useful history for them to explore.
seriously.
just a couple of podcasts. I ain’t kidding.
Little Boots
@OGLiberal:
did he ever marry that couple he promised to? that would be a cool presidential launch.
Steeplejack
@Cole:
LOL. I was in a bit of a diminuendo after reading the job-hunting/unemployment thread, but you have sent me off to bed with a smile on my face. This is why I can’t quit you, Cole. That and the pet pics. And the cheesy music threads.
Little Boots
@Steeplejack:
he’s insidious that way.
plus he resurrected the reply button.
OGLiberal
@Little Boots: “they claim to love history, and the founding era”
Because they confuse our deist, Enlightenment influenced founders with some mythical fundamentalist Christian guys. And they probably like the fact that the Virginia guys – Washington, Jefferson, Madison – owned brown people.
It’s not so different from their belief in the mythical St. Ron the Gipper.
Steeplejack
@Little Boots:
Well, I’m definitely grateful for that.
Little Boots
@Little Boots:
though he took his sweet time. and now I’m bitter again just thinking about it.
Little Boots
@OGLiberal:
they really do. it’s just a mess, and we can probably not do anything about it. but damn, it’s just a mess, and I want to sort it out. I really do. but who would care?
Ira-NY
@Little Boots:
He has dropped out of the Ames Straw Poll, but Is still going to participate in the caucus.
The Ames Straw Poll is an expensive joke. It means nothing.
Romney would be wise to pull out of the caucus.
Little Boots
@Ira-NY:
so if you had to predict? bachmann? she’s nuts enough.
Steeplejack
@Little Boots:
I wasn’t going to go there, but I was thinking it.
ETA: Night-night, all. Got to get up at 6:45 a.m. for yet another infernal day shift. How do you people do it?!
OGLiberal
@Little Boots: It appears that he did not:
http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/rudy_breaks_vows_AegbfVjepc3Fjxnuq2lNNM
I’ll take your charity and lie to you at the same time. What a wonderful man. But…9/11, 9/11, 9/11!
Odie Hugh Manatee
@OGLiberal:
Fix’t.
Little Boots
@OGLiberal:
Rudy CAN fail.
themanintheguyfawkesmask
@Little Boots:
FTFY
Ira-NY
@Little Boots:
The Ames Straw Poll is so crooked, I am reluctant to even guess. Plus, I do not think the Dutch Reformed are ready to make a commitment.
Everyone in Iowa knows it is an expensive joke. Only the NYT and the cable swells will pay any attention to it.
Vander Plaatz will let us know who the winner of the Iowa Republican caucus is going to be later this year.
Little Boots
@themanintheguyfawkesmask:
better.
in fact he’s the perfect embodiment of how that party can make anyone a total douche.
Little Boots
to his credit, such as it is, I assume Mitt gets that Iowa is all about the fundamentalist freaks and no mormon has a chance. but I wonder if he gets how that is not restricted to Iowa.
El Cid
Giuliani ’12: For Honor Among Thieves.
Little Boots
is it really just the Dutch Reformed? Are they the biggies, there, Ira. I thought it was a few churches?
Ira-NY
@Little Boots:
They will determine the winner. There are a lot of them. They all vote. They vote in a solid block.
Triassic Sands
Sigh. Does Sarah think they’re going to declare her president by acclamation. It’s really touching. Apparently, she doesn’t believe the polls about her negatives.
John Puma
You “doubt she makes it to Des Moines”?
Check your map!
IF “Palin is bringing her Constitution-draped bus to the Iowa State Fair, just 30 miles south of where the Republican presidential field will take the stage on Thursday for a presidential debate in Ames,” THEN she IS in Des Moines!!!
FYI: “The Iowa State Fairgrounds are located at East 30th Street and East University Avenue, 10 minutes east of downtown Des Moines. ”
ttp://www.iowastatefair.org/for-visitors/maps-directions/
Bulworth
Other than the “Club For Growth”, the second weirdest name in politics is Republican Study Committee.
Although The Tenth Amendment Task Force is giving both of them a run for their money.
Bulworth
I honestly can’t tell whether this is snark or not.
mds
@Ira-NY:
Indeed, in 2007 Brownback made a campaign stop in Pella, so someone on his staff knew the lay of the land. Too bad for him that he converted to papism, or he would have been more attractive than Huckabee to the Pella and Orange City inbred theocrats.
West of the Rockies (formerly Frank W.)
A little late to the conversation, but really I just want to start yelling at my screen and tell her to go away forever! And why wasn’t she on the list of “Most Hated Person in America”? O.J. is locked away for 30 years and will come out decrepid; Paris is useless but at least passably attractive (physically). Octomom? Isn’t she, like, so 2009? Spencer Pratt I think needs to be punched and slapped down and made aware of how talentless he really is (he received my vote). But I woulda voted for Palin!
West of the Rockies (formerly Frank W.)
Damn… killed another thread. I must have the record….