Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I conferred with the team and they all agree – still not tired of winning!

Joe Lieberman disappointingly reemerged to remind us that he’s still alive.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires republicans to act in good faith.

“Why isn’t this Snickers bar only a nickle?”

Narcissists are always shocked to discover other people have agency.

They were going to turn on one another at some point. It was inevitable.

We are aware of all internet traditions.

They’re not red states to be hated; they are voter suppression states to be fixed.

Reality always lies in wait for … Democrats.

Everybody saw this coming.

Black Jesus loves a paper trail.

No Justins, No Peace

Whatever happens next week, the fight doesn’t end.

We’re not going back!

The GOP couldn’t organize an orgy in a whorehouse with a fist full of 50s.

I wonder if trump will be tried as an adult.

No offense, but this thread hasn’t been about you for quite a while.

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

Fuck the extremist election deniers. What’s money for if not for keeping them out of office?

We still have time to mess this up!

Just because you believe it, that doesn’t make it true.

Trump’s legal defense is going to be a dumpster fire inside a clown car on a derailing train.

An almost top 10,000 blog!

Let us savor the impending downfall of lawless scoundrels who richly deserve the trouble barreling their way.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Friday Night Open Thread

Friday Night Open Thread

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What kind of mayhem are we getting into tonight?

If one of you reprobates so much as mentions Michael Moore in this thread so help me I will not only ban you, but I will track you down, give you a gypsy beat-down ala Snatch, then rub tuna all over you, tie you to the ground and let Tunch finish you off like Brick Top’s pigs.

Reader Interactions

200Comments

  3. 3.

    Phoenician in a time of Romans

    I don’t understand. What exactly has the New Zealand ambassador to the US done that has you so upset, John?

  8. 8.

    celticragonchick

    Michael Moore came to my house and insulted my cat. He also ate two of my chicken fingers when I wasn’t looking.(Olivia’s feelings were hurt and I was consoling her.)

    He owes me a fast food meal and 58 dollars for pet therapy.

  10. 10.

    jl

    I am going to hold a private two minutes of hate on the Steelers. Assuming my attention span lasts that long.

  14. 14.

    Dee Loralei

    Damned long day. If another person speaks to me, I’m liable to kick them in the shins. No, not even a hello. I’m tired of people yammering at me.

    On the other hand, I discovered a new beer and I may drink all 6 in the next 10 minutes. “Monty Python’s Holy Ale.” It’s tempered over burning witches. Dear God, I hope it makes me chill the fuck out.

  17. 17.

    a geek named Bob

    I’m (slowly) gathering the parts to take my city block off the grid.

    Also, i am planning out my routes to get to Maker Faire, while avoiding the Wall St. protesters.

  21. 21.

    Halteclere

    I’m holed up in a hotel room all weekend in NYC, working on design docs. I’ve been performing site work up here all month, and if I can knuckle down and get these docs finished I won’t have to work nights and weekends on them when I get back to my home and family. Whooo hooo!

    Also, why does HBO have to have so many damn shows on boxing? I just want some movie to play in the background that I can pay slight attention to. I want something playing in the background that doesn’t have adds, and the internet at this hotel so slow I can’t easily stream radio.

  25. 25.

    gogol's wife

    I tried to make this comment in the Eric Cantor thread, but twice it wouldn’t let me make it. So here it is. I found it very amusing that a commenter saying that Eric Cantor might be compared to one’s cat elicited numerous outraged protests. On this blog you do not mess with cats.

  26. 26.

    jacy

    Making from-scratch Dutch apple pie. Watching Haven. Maybe trying to clear off something from the DVR. (Hello, last season’s Mad Men.) Possibly Probably downing a pitcher of caprihanas. If I could quit politics completely I imagine I would drink less.

    Oh, and the first Avalanche preseason game is on the 23rd. So for now I’m enjoying the fact that we’re undefeated this season! So there’s that.

  27. 27.

    khead

    Michael Moore is fat.

    Tunch is fat.

    Already in with Maryland (-1) for tomorrow – even with 2 Maryland WR’s suspended for punching some dude in a 7-11.

    That’s three big f’ing strikes, methinks.

    Folks need to keep posting in the last Moore thread to get it over 300. comments.

  30. 30.

    Loneoak

    I’m grilling up some tuna tacos. Got a big bag of delicious looking peppers that I’m going to char on the grill too. Made my famous frijoles.

    Tunch is welcome if he’d like some tuna tacos.

  31. 31.

    Silver

    That gypsy comment and their portrayal in Snatch is racist.

    No, I don’t need sugar. I’m sweet enough…

  34. 34.

    Mino

    Getting ready to rewatch the 2010 series of So You Think You Can Dance. That probably makes me the weirdest one in the thread.

  35. 35.

    Loneoak

    Also too, I’d like to preemptively bitch about the Big Ten Network for tomorrow morning when I will be spastically hunting down a torrent for the UMich game. One of these days the powers that be will learn that it is not good business to make it so fucking hard on fans to watch games. It is impossible for me to get the BTN where I live, but they don’t fucking care. I would pay $5/game to stream, but that would be too reasonable.

  36. 36.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    Long week. Now chilling with a glass of red wine and eating my last remaining “Crunchie” bar (have to go to World Market for a restock soon) I have a weekend of cleaning ahead of me as my Mum is arriving on the 23rd. I don’t know why I bother of course because all she does when she is here is clean. I should just leave it for her to do :) Trying to figure out where to put Con’s ashes will be put off until Mum gets here. Methinks me and Norman (Mum’s better half) will construct some sort of thingy to put the Urn in one of his favorite spots to sleep.

    Spotted lettuce plants at the garden center today, must buy some and get them in the newly mulched raised beds for lots of salad greens during the fall. Our temps went from 90 degrees yesterday to 68 today, I am seriously thinking fall crops of peas, carrots and many lettuces.

  37. 37.

    Gordon, The Big Express Engine

    John – Do you know what “nemesis” means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified in this case by a horrible cunt… me.

  39. 39.

    jl

    Because I am loyal Balloon Juice reader, and know what to do, I looked for Michael Moores for juvenile but very needed and socially productive Cole taunting, but somehow got “Michelle More” instead. Because I am clumsy and oblivious, but of a kind that sometimes leads to good things.

    Woo hoo! Do I like volleyball.

    http://www.morestonebarger.com/

    You know, the problem with this miserable lefty blog is not enough volleyball.

  42. 42.

    PurpleGirl

    @J.W. Hamner: I have a friend who keeps talking about how good sous-vide cooking is. He’s working making temperature/timing elements that you can attach to slow cookers. It sounds interesting.

  44. 44.

    Cat Lady

    This afternoon I heard the wife of a inmate resident at my mother’s nursing home scolding a visting relative who was blaming Terry Francona for the Red Sox collapse as just like everyone blaming Obama for everything. I wonder if she lurks here.

  46. 46.

    khead

    @Loneoak:

    I know most people HATE Comcast, but they actually have 4 or 5 BTN channels in MD. Not sure what other cable providers and Direct TV have….

  47. 47.

    Strandedvandal

    Mayhem? I’m sitting in a damn hotel room in Moncton, New Brunswick reading some asinine comments on a blog. I am doing serious damage to Mac and Cheese and a couple of dogs. I guess you could call that mayhem.

    * Always get a hotel room with a kitchen from now on. This rocks. 50.00 for dinner? Nope, I’ll just cook something up at “home”

  49. 49.

    gelfling545

    Balancing my checkbook. Why is that stupid minus sign in front of the final balance? Oh, yeah. That’s why. Time for a shot of the family cold remedy

  56. 56.

    Tom Hilton

    What kind of mayhem are we getting into tonight?

    Friday Night Drinking & Shooting Club! (Or, as my girlfriend calls it, the Ale & Quail Club.) Lot of really talented photographers in the group (no, I don’t count myself among them), including one named Michael Moore. No relation to a person who isn’t supposed to be named in this thread.

  58. 58.

    khead

    @opal:

    Check this out.

    Not a Maryland grad or even a fan, really, but they damn sure made news with those unis. Kevin Plank is annoying, but pretty smart.

    Now they need to win….

  59. 59.

    PurpleGirl

    @MikeJ: Oooooooohhhhhhh! Thanks for the heads up. I remember seeing those in a movie theater. I’d forgotten that my father liked them and took us to see them. It balances out that the only other movie he took us to was Advise and Consent.

  62. 62.

    Comrade Colette Collaboratrice

    Now: not finishing my work.
    Soon: making gingerbread and Meyer lemon curd with the offspring.
    Later: eating challah and roast chicken, then gingerbread, etc.
    After that: drinking wine and vegetating in front of the (recorded) Giants game.

  63. 63.

    MattR

    @Loneoak: @Raven (formerly stuckinred): I get the Big Ten Netowrk via Xfinity, but cant access btn2go :( However I do have a slingbox type device that let’s someone connect via the Internet and watch whatever is on my cable box. You are free to access that tomorrow if you want. Let me know if you want more details and I can give you my email addy.

    (EDIT: Love that Coastal Carolina coach)

    @Strandedvandal: I had a blast going out in Moncton. Might have been related to the end of a 70+ hour work week and the cheap price of drinks (and everything else) compared to NYC.

  64. 64.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    Just wanted to point out that this

    http://leestranahan.com/announcing-the-dental-fund

    is everything that is wrong with America right now. A guy pretty much forced into begging to get his teeth fixed. I don’t know how anyone can raise the foam finger and screech “USA, USA, USA” when their citizens are reduced to this.

    I think that I am going to see if he can sort out a web site for the law firm here, for a suitable donation, I think my boss would enjoy blogging.

  65. 65.

    Comrade Mary

    CBC’s As It Happens just finished off with a story on two big headlines from yesterday, although the host Jeff Douglas #waves# said that the badger story had to be false as it started from Britain’s equivalent of the Weekly World News.

    And according to the HuffPo — rest assured, no porn actor was turned into Badger Chow.

    A Huffington Post Weird News reporter contacted the local police in Tregaron, Wales where Foster was allegedly found to check the facts. The official told The HuffPost that she hadn’t heard of any report of the alleged death.
    __
    The Internet Adult Film Database — a smutty IMDB — didn’t have any record of Foster. Nor are there any matches for the supposed film The Sport said gave Foster his big break: “Hi-Ho- Hi-Ho, It’s Up Your Arse We Go.”
    __
    X-rated historian Bill Margold told HuffPost he had never heard of Foster, adding that someone of his stature would be memorable.

    Nicolas Cage did actually claim he was once confronted in his bedroom by a naked man eating a Fudgsicle, so there is some magic in the world after all.

  66. 66.

    Tom Hilton

    I will track you down, give you a gypsy beat-down ala Snatch, then rub tuna all over you, tie you to the ground and let Tunch finish you off like Brick Top’s pigs.

    Just don’t feed me to the badgers.

  68. 68.

    Raven (formerly stuckinred)

    @Mino: It’s gone totally viral. They play here tomorrow and it got picked up early in the week before catching fire on the world wide internet. I just listened to him on a call in show and he’s hilarious. Coached with Danny Ford at Clemson if that tells you anything.

  69. 69.

    J.W. Hamner

    @PurpleGirl:

    Yeah, for less than $100 you can hack a slow (or rice) cooker into a sous vide machine… they even have boxes you can buy for a bit more to avoid even opening the cooker up.

    At this point I’m trying to decide whether I even like sous vide enough to want to be able to do it at home (hence the beer cooler)… I’m not a huge steak guy and tend more towards braises and stews, so it’s questionable how much use I’d really get out of it, and my kitchen it quite small.

  74. 74.

    khead

    Also, I know I am about 4 years late here – the bargain bin is a gamer’s friend if you have patience (and you are cheap like me) – but Bioshock is an awesome game.

  77. 77.

    Strandedvandal

    @Maude: Amen to that. Tim Hortons coffee leaves something to be desired. And I am using some fancy French mustard, this is Quebecois country, so everything is French-ish

  79. 79.

    PurpleGirl

    @J.W. Hamner: My friend has been experimenting with all kinds of meat to see what he likes best.

    I’d like to try it. The cooler is something I could try and then ask him to build me something that fits in my small kitchen. I’ve book-marked that page.

  80. 80.

    Paddy

    Making a pot of chicken/broccolli/corn chowder and reveling in my talent at making low so foods these days. Goddess bless the person who came up with bags o’ frozen chicken breasts, the convience rocks.

    And also too, thanks so much to the person (I forgot who) that rec’d way to get new “Torchwood”.

  85. 85.

    boss bitch

    If one of you reprobates so much as mentions Michael Moore in this thread so help me I will not only ban you, but I will track you down, give you a gypsy beat-down ala Snatch, then rub tuna all over you, tie you to the ground and let Tunch finish you off like Brick Top’s pigs.

    that sounds really hawt.

  97. 97.

    passerby

    @Loneoak:

    Don’t know if this can help you, but, I’ve just discovered espn3.com. They’ll blackout certain games (like the ones you most what to see (LSU)) but I find that far away games are available.

    Hope this helps.

    free stream.

  104. 104.

    Elie

    @Strandedvandal:

    You got my apology… see — already posted

    (the speed of comments just cannot keep up with the real world comment speed! esp when I have had a couple of pops!)

  107. 107.

    Measles Montgomery

    After that rye manhattan-and-a-half, I’m feeling a bit masochistic.

    Michael Moore is the best thing to happen to librul politiks!

    Wheeee!!!!

  108. 108.

    trollhattan

    @jeffreyw:

    Nothing brightens a day quite like a shiny new camera. I’m toying with getting an E-5 while they’re still on sale, but replacing my #%^$%^ laptop savaged my toy budget. :-(

    Enjoy!

  111. 111.

    trollhattan

    Also too, along with summer I shall miss “Summer Solstice” from Anderson Valley Brewing. Where they speak Boont.

  112. 112.

    Strandedvandal

    @MattR: Yeah, probably so. There’s a Timmy’s on just about every corner. 1.50 for a large cup of coffee, and there are lines pretty much all the time at most of them. They have to be raking in a fortune. Must be the doughnuts.

  113. 113.

    The Dangerman

    @Comrade Kevin:

    There was a crash at the Reno Air Races today.

    Ugly; reminds me of the BLM off-road wreck from almost exactly a year ago. Last I read, someone or some group was suing the ass off of everyone from that one; this looks similar.

  114. 114.

    MattR

    @Strandedvandal: Not only that, but the lines move faster than anywhere else I’ve ever seen. You pull into a line at the drive thru that would take 30 minutes at McDonald’s and pull out with your order 5 minutes later. (And they were putting together bagels and breakfast sandwiches in addition to coffee and doughnuts)

  115. 115.

    jeffreyw

    @And Another Thing…:
    @trollhattan:
    I’ve been lusting after one of those D7000s with the fancy schmancy 3D auto focus and the ISO speeds to a zillion or more. Mrs J said the shelter was having an open house and they asked her if I would shoot some photos. She volunteered me so I volunteered to buy the Nikon.

  116. 116.

    trollhattan

    @The Dangerman:

    Nasty, and happens so fast. Just last weekend I pulled off Highway 50 to catch some of the acts at the Mather Air show and saw a P-51 flying in formation with an F-15. Pretty special thing to see, and makes me wonder whether that P-51 was racing this week.

  117. 117.

    Elie

    How about a virtual cocktail party?

    We are on four timezones, so we have to use our “imaginations”!

    I got my glass of red “Black Barrel Washington state Merlot – from the Rattlesnake Hills winery and also am partaking in some local chive imbedded gouda with crackers.

    What you all out there having? Also hope you are enjoying like I am

  118. 118.

    bemused

    It’s kitten mayhem at our house. Our two new kittens have recovered from upper respiratory crud and are making up for two weeks feeling punky. They make us laugh constantly. Plus they are extremely snuggly. Kitty heaven.

  121. 121.

    Mr Stagger Lee

    I heard that JC and ABL also dispatched Boris the Blade and Bullet Tooth Tony to all of you rebels thank God Mickey here is to protect me. Speaking of which. I am going to the bookies to make some bets. Hope this tip sheet from Frankie Four Fingers is up to speed.

  124. 124.

    Elie

    @bemused:

    extremely snuggly kittens are always 4+—

    I love kittens and pups… baby things…

    I am sure lizard babies are also cool, but just not that familiar with them. Bird babies are darling though… have tens of hummers at feeders here in spring… love watching their antics…

  127. 127.

    Suffern ACE

    @Elie: I’m having Saxon Homestead Creamery gouda cheese along with some fancy mustard that I bought at the Mustard Museum last month when I was home visiting the folks. Must be a night for gouda.

  129. 129.

    trollhattan

    @Elie:

    I’ll belly up. After said ale I’m returning to a 2000 Amador County Syrah, lightly opened last night. Then, it’s matching something to the scallops that will be surrendering themselves for dinner. Maybe a Roussanne.

    TGIF!

  132. 132.

    Elie

    @Suffern ACE:

    Ewww — is it sharp on the tongue immediately, or a backnote? Texture is very important to me but how it rolls off is important..

    @trollhattan:

    Well scallops! Of course! Did you freeze them before making them surrender to your will? And how did you make them “plead for mercy”…

    I am having nothing too special tonight. A steak salad (flank steak marinated in soy and garlic) on greens with tomatoes and red onions. Have a loaf of local rosemary garlic bread. For dessert will eat a beautiful peach
    (trying to lose some junk in the trunk, so playing it a little conservative)

    Details please!

  134. 134.

    Steeplejack

    Night shift checking in. Worked an unusual day shift today and have been home since 6:00. Had a nice dinner, watched Ronin on Epix–it holds up pretty well–and now I’m checking in on the Rays-Red Sox game. Can’t decide if I want the Rays to catch Boston or not. FTFY, of course. That goes without saying.

    I am starting a three-day weekend, and I am loving that.

  135. 135.

    Elie

    @PurpleGirl:

    Ya know, that seems a simple drink but is frequently effed up.

    You can approximate it though fairly strainghforwardly by having good, fresh squeezed limeade with salt on the rim of the glass.

    Hey —

    For those who need a little relaxation after a hard week:

    Have THE BEST relaxation bath EVAH. Kneip makes this great hops valerian bath tonic — just a cap full in a warm bath and you are just ready to ooze into the bed and have a great night’s sleep. I don’t want to be a promo for this but look up the product on the net (Kneip Hops and Valerian herbal bath). Its the best thing for stressed out folks — smells great and is low tech accessible)

  138. 138.

    trollhattan

    @The Dangerman:

    SRSLY? Sorry, but that’s nuts. No way an 80YO circulatory system should be subjected to high-Gs like that, much less do so where he can take out another plane or worse, this very scenario.

    Heard an interview on local radio ten minutes ago with a pilot who witnessed it, and his suspicion is a seizure of some kind, as the plane was acting normally then erratically in a fashion that didn’t suggest mechanical failure.

  140. 140.

    The Dangerman

    @trollhattan:

    SRSLY? Sorry, but that’s nuts.

    Absolutely insane.

    I’m hearing that the plane reportedly got too close to the plane in front and possibly got in the wake.

    I know a couple people into that kind of thing (one a biplane stunt pilot; flew with her once and only once), so I’ve been listening in…

    …AP is reporting the pilot has been confirmed as deceased. There’s a shocker.

  144. 144.

    PurpleGirl

    The pilot was identified as Jimmy Leeward of Ocala, FL. He owns the Leeward Air Ranch and has a Racing Team. His web site is currently being blocked.

  147. 147.

    hamletta

    @Raven (formerly stuckinred): Well, of course! The power of their combined horn sections ought to be wired to the grid as part of a green energy initiative.

    I loved it, and I have an old-standing dislike of Chicago from being in a marching band in the ’70s.

  148. 148.

    Caz

    Does that mean you are defending Michael Moore and don’t want to hear anyone else bash your buddy, or you agree he’s an asshole and you don’t need to keep hearing it?

    I hope you do track me down for this post – that will mean a couple of days where we won’t have to scroll past your irrelevant open threads, thoughtless rhetoric, and dinner party reviews.

  149. 149.

    trollhattan

    @Elie:

    They’re the big Easty Coasty type, which we never get in the shell out here. Fresh today from the fish market, methinks to be pan-seared in olive oil, butter, pepper and tarragon. Scallops are easy to ruin–I’m hoping for slightly carmelized while barely warmed in the center.

    Now where’s that AWOL family?

  150. 150.

    Martin

    Mom just called from Reno. Plane crashed where their seats were, but they happened to not be there at the time. She’s pretty fucking freaked out.

  152. 152.

    Martin

    @The Dangerman: One of my students was at the BLM race and was injured. He said the race organization was a complete clusterfuck, and yeah, they’re suing the organizers.

  154. 154.

    trollhattan

    @trollhattan:

    Ack, guess I’ll be getting a firsthand report tomorrow. A family friend just called home to let them know he wasn’t hit by debris at the races.

  156. 156.

    JPL

    @Martin: I’m so glad that your mother was not there. It must of been awful thinking she could be. I’m glad the student, although injured, is alive. Is there any idea what happened?

  157. 157.

    The Dangerman

    @Martin:

    …they’re suing the organizers.

    …and the BLM and the driver and (the list goes on).

    The BLM screwed the pooch (they admitted as much), but being on the downhill side after a jump is … unwise.

    Glad your Mom wasn’t in the stands or in the shrapnel zone (which looks pretty damn big).

  161. 161.

    Martin

    @PurpleGirl: She’s fine – they were away from the area when it happened, but she said they would have been in that had they not decided to go off to do other stuff for a bit. My stepfather is a pilot, so they go to these things a lot.

  162. 162.

    Caz

    @Phyllis: I don’t read this for my “highfalutin’ interlektual tastes;” I read it for entertainment value after I’m done using my brain for the day. And to see who Cole is playing dinner servant to this time, and what yummy concoction he has come up with. And I sometimes even enjoy ABL’s racist rants.

  163. 163.

    The Spy Who Loved Me

    I won’t mention “he who shall not be named”, but I would like to point out that many seem to find four posts on the exact same subject matter a little bit tiresome. Reading over the comments, it looks like viewpoints are locked in and no one is changing anyone else’s mind. I’m hopeful that the latest posting is the last one.

    I started reading this blog at the time of the infamous counter tops incident. I found it to be one of the most interesting blogs on the web. Funny, provocative, lots of comments full of piss and vinegar. Now, not so much.

    I know nothing lasts forever, but this place was a whole lot more interesting when Cole did most of the postings and hadn’t handed off almost everything to the second string. Now, it’s full of weak writing, frequently boring naval gazing, and LOTS OF CAPS!!!! and EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!! In other words, rather than a place I checked into three or four times a day, it’s become a place that I look at a few times a week, skimming over most of the posts in the search of something interesting to read. When one does wander in the comments, there seems to be an echo chamber and dissent not only is not patriotic, it is not accepted.

    I just wish it could be the way it used to be. If Cole is tired of maintaining the blog, or no longer has the time, perhaps it’s time to fold up shop and let the other front pagers write at their own blogs. If Cole’s not going to write about something other than his dinner menu, give the Steelers’ score or post the occasional pet pic, I’d rather give someone else the page clicks.

  164. 164.

    Svensker

    @Elie:

    Really?
    Valerian and it smells good? I got some valerian pills to help with insomnia and that stuff reeks like old socks mixed with poo. It did help with the insomnia but I hated taking it.

    Will see if the local health food store has the bath oil.

  165. 165.

    Poopyman

    @Pavlov’s Dog: Al Gore. Who is fat.

    I get the MM reference, but have no clue what Snatch and Brick Top refer to. Am I hopelessly square or is this evidence of my impeccable good taste?

  168. 168.

    Uncle Clarence Thomas

    .
    .

    What kind of mayhem are we getting into tonight?

    I’m following up on my life-long vow to never let stupid white people or stupid black people define reality for me by demanding that I share their personal opinions, which they assure me are not opinions but proven facts.
    .
    .

  170. 170.

    Jebediah

    @The Spy Who Loved Me:
    I don’t think its time for Cole to fold up shop, as there are still a few of us enjoying the blog as it is. The internet is a pretty big place, with something to suit almost every taste.

  173. 173.

    burnspbesq

    Just finished up an excellent dinner, hot links and fried catfish from Burrell’s, the best soul food joint in SoCal.

    Yes, the best soul food in SoCal is behind the Orange Curtain. Suck on it, Angelenos.

  175. 175.

    Rick Taylor

    Michael Moore, Michel Moore, riding through the night!

    Michael Moore, Michael Moore, oh what a sight!

    He steals from the rich!

    And gives to the poor!

    Michael Moore!

    Michael Moore!

    Michael Moore!

  177. 177.

    Odie Hugh Manatee

    I’m enjoying the fact that something I made from an apple juice can, some aluminum plate, stainless steel wool, brass fittings, stainless all-thread, nuts, washers, and lock washers, is saving us money plus my time and labor. Here on the Oregon coast the high humidity and cooler temperatures lead to excessive condensation buildup in the oil/upper crankcase of engines that are driven short distances regularly. Combine that with a very poorly designed engine ventilation system on one of our vehicles (thanks GM!) that actually encourages this condensation and I end up having to change the oil in our cars as often as every six weeks. This is a waste of time, money and adds to pollution. The milky-white/beige oil is hard on the engine, even with it accumulating mostly in the higher regions inside the engine. The water vapor mixes with crankcase fumes to make sludge and the condensation in the oil forms a weak acid that is corrosive. Bad stuff.

    My device was made mostly from stuff on hand so it was cheap to make (in that I already had spent money on the parts long ago). What it does is route all engine crankcase fumes through a canister with baffles and stainless steel wool packing and then routes the fumes into the engine intake manifold. The canister is mounted in a cool place to encourage condensation in it and the hoses that feed in to it are large to inhibit buildup and clogging (the much smaller factory hoses always plugged within days of cleaning).

    Today I opened the tap on the canister and drained it for the first time, expecting water and not being disappointed. I got almost a quart out of it since installing the canister in that car (two months ago), which is more than I expected. I knew it was working because the oil was staying clean and there is almost no trace of condensation in the usual places (upper crankcase). I first thought this mess was being caused by a head gasket but I replaced it, having the head trued at the same time, and it started up again after I put it back together. A cooling system pressure check confirmed that there were no internal coolant leaks.

    It works great, is cheap, saves money, pollutes less and reduces engine wear. I even powder-coated it so it would last a long time without rusting, thus the use of stainless hardware and packing material. I have installed the same thing in my bike and the Mustang but they are driven longer distances than my wife’s car, which she drives to her job that is a mile away. She has to go in at 4:30 AM and walking is not an option for her at that time of the morning.

    So this evening I am very happy and basking in the glow of my automotive brilliance. ;)

    I’ll save my rant about Mexican rebuilders using narrower bearings in rebuilt alternators to save money and shorten its lifespan for another time. I’m on the fourth alternator in almost six years and the supplier finally tells me to take a new one and have the narrow bearings replaced with ones that are the proper width.

    Nice.

    Hey! I didn’t mention Michael Mo… Oh yeah… :)

  178. 178.

    Gracie

    My husband comes home from his work trip, we watch Project Runway with alcohol.

    And we keep score! The loser makes the winner’s choice of dessert at season’s end…I’m on my way to making a 7-layer cake, I’m sure.

  180. 180.

    Odie Hugh Manatee

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Yup. A car still, though I can guarantee that I’m not drinking the shit that came out of it. What’s funny is that it’s a clear amber color, like booze (think Yukon Jack but thin, like water). No globs of oil, just a clear amber fluid.

    Thirsty? ;)

  183. 183.

    Odie Hugh Manatee

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Good choice. :)

    @Jebediah:

    The one on the bike is a 15 oz. chicken broth can. It’s mounted horizontally with the drain on the low side (bike on kickstand) for ease of draining. The ones in the other two cars are made from 48 oz. juice cans, also mounted horizontally. The stainless steel wool is packed between two drilled baffles in the center third of the can. The baffles are mounted on two lengths of all-thread that run through the can, holding the plates and packing in place. This leaves a dead-zone at each end of the can, allowing for accumulation and drainage. The ends of the cans were dremeled out, leaving a 1/4 inch lip around the top and bottom of them. I used 1/8th inch aluminum plate for the end plates, drilled with two holes for the all-thread to pass through and three more for the 1/2 inch NPT fittings used for the inlet, outlet and drain valve. It’s simple, cheap and effective. The end plates are sealed with RTV sealant and it can be disassembled for easy cleaning if needed.

    BTW, the one on the motorcycle is mounted behind the carbs, between the frame tabs that mounted the original air filter box. The crankcase hose runs to the canister intake and from there the line runs to a small manifold (made from brass fittings) that is mounted under the seat, above the tool kit area. Three hoses run from that to the pod air filters, feeding into the ends of them.

    You can’t even tell that it’s installed unless you are really up close and looking for it. It looks factory with the gloss black powder coating on the fittings and canister/plates.

    I don’t do ‘automotive ugly’. I want it to look good and work!

  185. 185.

    Odie Hugh Manatee

    Here’s a pic of the parts for the motorcycle one prior to assembly, and here’s a pic of the assembled unit.

    Note that on the motorcycle unit I placed the packing between two coarse screens that are held in place with RTV silicone (visible in first pic). I did this to save space in the small can, leaving more room for condensate. The two canisters on our cars have aluminum plates that are fitted to the all-thread since there is more room in them.

  187. 187.

    Odie Hugh Manatee

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Thanks! I like working with my hands and putting the time and thought in to something that pays off. Sloppy work just don’t cut it with me.

    It makes showing off your work embarrassing…lol!

  189. 189.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Odie Hugh Manatee: I had a grandfather who was a master tool and dye maker. He left manufacturing to teach because he believed that he had a responsibility to teach the next generation. After he retired, he made perfect spheres out of stainless steel using only a lathe. Accurate to within 1/1000 of an inch. He did it just to show it could be done. Weird old bastard, he was.

    ETA: he taught me to read a micrometer and set up a drill press among other things. I don’t do them ever, but I can.

  190. 190.

    Odie Hugh Manatee

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    The thing I like about machinery is its precise nature. It can be very unforgiving for the negligent or those prone to short cuts. When I turned wrenches for a living I prided myself on sending out a job and not having it return with the same problem. Nothing makes for a more loyal customer than one you rarely see and not because of your mistakes in a previous repair. Troubleshooting is an art form of sorts, you have to know what is happening, the interactions of related systems and the ability to trace problems to their root.

    It requires lots of hands on experience and a thorough understanding of how things work. All kinds of things, many you would never consider an asset to mechanical skills, are essential for doing a good job in a diagnosis/repair. I’ve been teaching our son how to do it and he’s doing very well for his age (16). I tell him that the ladies love a guy who can fix stuff and do a good job doing it, especially when it’s their stuff. His Mom confirms this.

    That got his attention. :)

  192. 192.

    Odie Hugh Manatee

    Not really that much difference really, more like variety at my end. I work in computers and networking (home and small business) and at times things get pretty gray when diagnosing a computer problem…lol! I like things that are both precise and imprecise since one is the yin to the others yang, IMO. Precision is reliable, you know what you need and as long as you are able to deliver then everything works. Imprecise requires the Hail Mary toss of ‘lets see if this works’ at times.

    The imprecise makes ‘winning’ more fun since it was more of a gamble. Precise means you win as long as you do the right thing.

  197. 197.

    Mike D.

    Watchin’ Neil Young concert flick Prairie Wind, eatin’ my girl’s lentil soup (rich & hearty with cheddar on top), drinking Leinies Oktober (I know, mistake, I thought I rememberd loving it… turns out just remembered lovin’ it being 2 bucks cheaper than Paulaner back in Sconnie…); …And thinking things are gonna be okay….

    …Also getting ready to be homesick for a crispy mid-September Madison Farmers Market tomorrow morning (just moved to Mpls-St.P with the new law student special lady.

    Cheers y’all.

  198. 198.

    Mustang Bobby

    Friday was my birthday, so my boss took me to lunch. Then last night I got together with friends. We started out with cheese and drinks, then went to my favorite Thai restaurant (Tani on US 1 and SW 122nd in Miami in case you’re curious) where we all shared Basil Duck, Volcano Chicken, Pad Thai, and Shrimp Massaman. Then back to my friends’ house for cupcakes. All in all, a nice way to turn 59.

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