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You are here: Home / Open Threads / Funky shit going down in the city

Funky shit going down in the city

by DougJ|  October 19, 20116:48 pm| 38 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads

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You won’t like where I got this from but it is funny (here):

“First of all, I don’t even know what SimCity is. Okay? I don’t even know what it is. Secondly, it’s a lie. That’s all I can say. I don’t even know what SimCity is.” — Herman Cain, responding to accusations that his 9-9-9 tax plan was inspired by the video game SimCity 4.

Update. I think Donna Summers is a poet too. Also.

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Reader Interactions

38Comments

  1. 1.

    JPL

    October 19, 2011 at 6:50 pm

    You know what else is a lie, he never said he trade gitmo prisoners a soldier.

    edit ..just saying

  2. 2.

    AA+ Bonds

    October 19, 2011 at 6:52 pm

    I’d like to point out how weird and cool it is to see the Teamsters use the phrase “Merry Pranksters” as a compliment. The Teamsters!

    It’s like OWS went Superman II and traveled back in time to fix 1968.

  3. 3.

    Schad

    October 19, 2011 at 6:55 pm

    He has yet to deny, however, that his favourite rhetorical device was inspired by that time that he zoned out in the produce section for a good five minutes.

  4. 4.

    AA+ Bonds

    October 19, 2011 at 6:56 pm

    Herman Cain’s approval rating is directly proportional to the amount of Pokemon he has collected

  5. 5.

    Mark B.

    October 19, 2011 at 6:57 pm

    9-9-9 was his second choice, but five dollar foot longs was already taken.

  6. 6.

    Mark B.

    October 19, 2011 at 6:59 pm

    Free crazy bread with every vote. Just sayin’. It’s a deal that’s hard to beat.

  7. 7.

    Martin

    October 19, 2011 at 6:59 pm

    Can’t wait for him to unleash the Godzilla urban renewal plan.

  8. 8.

    r€nato

    October 19, 2011 at 7:01 pm

    I’m surprised that conservatives haven’t come up with “ConservaCity”, as an answer to the liberal-biased SimCity (which treats global warming as a fact, among other heresies). In ConservaCity, you can zone industrial right next to residential and it has no effect on growth. Economic activity increases in exponential inverse proportion to the tax rate. The game’s default state is to start with a number of laws against pollution, which dampen economic activity. The more anti-pollution laws are repealed, the more economic activity grows with no impact whatsoever from increased pollution.

    And so on.

  9. 9.

    AA+ Bonds

    October 19, 2011 at 7:06 pm

    To be pedantic, the 9%-9%-9% taxes in SimCity 4 are different municipal property taxes by zone (residential, industrial, commercial). Which isn’t nearly as stupid as a 9% tax on every sales transaction during an economic downturn.

    In other words, SimCity 4’s designers are a lot smarter, a lot smarter, than Herman Cain.

    But yeah, his little Paris-Hilton-wealth-manager probably got the idea for his whole “economic plan” from a video game. Between that and all those speeches Cain gave quoting the theme to the 2000 Pokemon movie as the words of “a poet”, I’m guessing that his advisory staff is at least 25% GRADE-A TROLL LOL LOL LOL

  10. 10.

    Warren Terra

    October 19, 2011 at 7:11 pm

    @AA+ Bonds:
    You’re losing your Nerd Cred here. Time travel was the solution in Superman I. Superman II was the one with “Kneel Before Zod”.

  11. 11.

    AA+ Bonds

    October 19, 2011 at 7:14 pm

    @Warren Terra:

    It’s both films. In the director’s cut of the second one he does the trick to put Zod and company back in the Phantom Zone.

    Honestly I fuckin hate those movies except for the cast. It took Grant Morrison to fix the stories and that was like thirty years later

  12. 12.

    soonergrunt

    October 19, 2011 at 7:20 pm

    @AA+ Bonds:

    Between that and all those speeches Cain gave quoting the theme to the 2000 Pokemon movie as the words of “a poet”,

    If you have a link for this, I’d kick a nun in the crotch if you wanted me to.

  13. 13.

    arguingwithsignposts

    October 19, 2011 at 7:21 pm

    New Slogan Time

    Herman Cain: Apples and Oranges, bitchez!

    A-P-P-L-E-S O-R-A-N-G-E-S

  14. 14.

    AA+ Bonds

    October 19, 2011 at 7:21 pm

    I’ve been trying to make a YOU CAN’T CUT BACK ON FUNDING! YOU WILL REGRET THIS! but I’m having trouble replacing the picture of the nerdy transportation adviser with the entire American electorate.

  15. 15.

    Frapalinger

    October 19, 2011 at 7:22 pm

    We all know the inspiration for the 9-9-9 plan was a coupon for a large pie and a two liter for $9.99.

  16. 16.

    AA+ Bonds

    October 19, 2011 at 7:22 pm

    @soonergrunt:

    Doug’s actually referencing it with the YouTube he put in the update. It was a Donna Summers track, but not an old favorite – instead it was the track she cut for Pokemon: The Movie.

    Here you go but don’t kick anyone :/

  17. 17.

    Morzer

    October 19, 2011 at 7:23 pm

    Herman Cain – from nine, nine, nine to whine whine,whine. He really does have a plan for every occasion.

  18. 18.

    Ken

    October 19, 2011 at 7:26 pm

    I sometimes think we would get a better class of politicians if they had to first win a few games of SimCity, Civilization, and Diplomacy.

    Oh, and AA+ Bonds @9: It’s not every transaction; purchases of stock, index funds, and so forth would not be subject to the sales tax. It’s the usual logic that says a 0.05% Tobin tax on market transactions would destroy the economy, but 9% on every other effing transaction will be fine.

  19. 19.

    AA+ Bonds

    October 19, 2011 at 7:27 pm

    @Ken:

    Yeah but the way I said it is the way you should say it when you’re talking to people so they don’t fall asleep in front of you

  20. 20.

    Cliff in NH

    October 19, 2011 at 7:55 pm

    @Ken:

    dividends are also at 0%, don’t forget that, not just cap gains!

    that alone destroys the market for tax free bonds.

  21. 21.

    khead

    October 19, 2011 at 7:56 pm

    Confession from a gaming junkie:

    If you leave the tax rates at the 9-9-9 default level on SimCity4, then everyone pretty much exits the city if the difficulty level is set at medium or high.

  22. 22.

    eemom

    October 19, 2011 at 8:03 pm

    I went from Phoenix Arizona all the way to Tacoma Philadelphia Atlanta LA….

  23. 23.

    a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)

    October 19, 2011 at 8:08 pm

    @eemom: Another famous Clash song… (I’m hiding from Steve Miller right now)

  24. 24.

    Arclite

    October 19, 2011 at 8:12 pm

    Start with Steve Miller, but end up with Donna Summer singing a Pokemon song. That’s sad…

  25. 25.

    Dougerhead

    October 19, 2011 at 8:20 pm

    @eemom:

    Different song.

    Fun fact: mine was written by the guy the movie “Genghis Blues” was about.

  26. 26.

    a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)

    October 19, 2011 at 8:27 pm

    @Dougerhead: But at least it’s the right band; that’s progress!

  27. 27.

    MikeJ

    October 19, 2011 at 9:07 pm

    @Dougerhead: Speaking of songs, you need to go do the new Name That Tune over at cleekland.

  28. 28.

    Omnes Omnibus

    October 19, 2011 at 9:13 pm

    @a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q):

    that’s progress!

    Is it? Is it really?

  29. 29.

    master c

    October 19, 2011 at 10:11 pm

    I just heard this on my local 70’s radio today. I really like it.

  30. 30.

    Cat Lady

    October 19, 2011 at 10:19 pm

    Herman Cain is channeling the Republican id through 20 year old post modern cultural and commercial iconography and may end up being our first dadaist performance artist president with a plan to sell pizzas books taxes with three digits and a couple of fruits. Good luck future historians mining the meaning of these days. The Wingularity event horizon has distorted the field of perception so that we can no longer see the magnitude of the fucked-up-edness that is this election cycle. We Are All Mayans Now.

    On The Radio is Donna Summers’ best song, BTW.

  31. 31.

    Dougerhead

    October 19, 2011 at 11:08 pm

    @master c:

    I love this song. @Cat Lady:

    On The Radio is Donna Summers’ best song, BTW.

    Good too, but I like this one the best. I can’t get into Last Dance or Hot Stuff.

  32. 32.

    Pamoya

    October 19, 2011 at 11:11 pm

    @khead:

    If you leave the tax rates at the 9-9-9 default level on SimCity4, then everyone pretty much exits the city if the difficulty level is set at medium or high.

    Ha!

  33. 33.

    ChrisB

    October 19, 2011 at 11:15 pm

    @Cat Lady:

    On The Radio is Donna Summers’ best song, BTW.

    Really? Better than Bad Girls?

    Toot toot. Beep beep.

    And, actually, Dim All the Lights is my favorite too.

  34. 34.

    slag

    October 19, 2011 at 11:15 pm

    Apparently, our national sense of humor should be reserved only for discussing fences that kill people and not for selling video games that mock presidential candidates. Well, at least we have our priorities straight.

  35. 35.

    Fucen Pneumatic Fuck Wrench Tarmal

    October 19, 2011 at 11:18 pm

    i think we should be propping up the herman cain campaign, and i mean not just those of us who are guilty and white either. lets be honest, how much fun will it be to make gop primary voters have to choose between semi-viable cain, mormon romney, and insertachristian for ballance, their heads will assplode in a brocade of peak wingnuttyness.

    cain is the perfect spoiler, he makes them argue amongst themselves, because economically he makes the most sense to them, but they can’t pull that lever….they just can’t, but he will stir them up, at the same time, he poses no threat to the left or in a general.

  36. 36.

    Thoughtful Black Co-Citizen

    October 20, 2011 at 12:00 am

    @r€nato: Awesome. And that doesn’t get into the recreational activities which involve guns and liberals.

    I can’t get into Last Dance or Hot Stuff.

    Agreed to the 1st, you’re mad to the second.

  37. 37.

    eemom

    October 20, 2011 at 12:53 am

    re Donna Summer: Enough is Enough with Barbra Streisand. Nuff said.

  38. 38.

    humbert dinglepencker

    October 20, 2011 at 3:38 pm

    Naw. Donna Summer’s best song was the one that brought her fame, fortune, and following: Love to Love You Baby. Sex in song, sex in song…

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