Scheduled at 8pm (Eastern), on CBS. I’ll put up a robo-thread, but I don’t plan to be online then, much less watching the usual suspects rough themselves up… do any of you?
As a stopgap, Charlie Pierce’s predictions at Esquire:
I’m not kidding. This is getting exhausting. Once again, in anticipation of what will surely be a virtual Mardi Gras of hackneyed talking points, predictable quasi-conflicts, revolving eyeballs, and Newt Gingrich’s ego performing on the flying trapeze, I have to pretend that any of these various unemployables should be working the Fry-O-Later at Grover’s Bar and Grille in Reagan’s Balls, California, let alone that they’re qualified to be allowed near the nuclear launch codes for a living. It would be easier if I were a famous conservative pundit, even one who predicted back in ’08 that we would now be in the middle of President Romney’s campaign for re-election; then I could blame the hubristic ignorance of this pack of vacuous bastards on The Lib’ral Media and their Jedi mind-tricks. CBS is hosting this one. They should bring Dan Rather back for one night just to watch some heads detonate. Or, I could write this:
What would be refreshing would be if the front-runner (a 70.6% probability of nomination at InTrade this morning) Mitt Romney and the two other plausible candidates, Texas Governor Rick Perry and former Speaker Newt Gingrich were to make a joint deal followed by a joint announcement that while they have no objection to the schedule, they will not be appearing unless (1) every answer in every situation be allowed at least three minutes in response from everyone called upon to speak, and (2) the candidates get to choose the individuals who will ask at least half of the questions to assure that issues of concern to Republican primary voters finally get an opportunity not to hear the prejudices and often hilarious biases of the MSM repackaged as questions but rather get to hear real questions about the serious problems the president has bequeathed his successor.
Apparently, the famous conservative pundit* has neglected to notice that his longtime Mormon man-crush would have to be out of his slippery little mind to agree to this. Why should Romney agree to any format that would make it more difficult for his opponents to continue to make public jackasses of themselves? Because Mitt Romney is a selfless patriot less interested in his own personal political advantage than he is interested in educating the nation he hopes to lead?
__
Stop it. No, really. You’re killing me.
__
(Also, too: Neither Perry nor Gingrich is any more “plausible” than Ron Paul or Herman Cain, if that word has any meeting, Perry because he is a malfunctioning android, and Gingrich because ersatz-erudition blowing out of a guy who looks like a Macy’s Parade balloon designed by Thomas Nast is no way to go through life, son.)…
Click the link for the rest, including the best final two sentences EVAH.
(*This guy.)
cathyx
It’s our weekly baffoon parade.
Svensker
Ouchie ouchie ouch! Also, too, LOL.
soonergrunt
I will be skipping tonight’s Republican “debate” so that I can continue my service to our great country by logging more time in the Star Wars: The Old Republic beta test. With my new 23″ monitor.
I’ve already determined that the onboard Radeon HD 4290 graphics on my system, as good as it is, isn’t up to the challenge of this game, and so next week, I’ll be testing a new Radeon HD 6970 card.
The sacrifces I make for you people–I hope you all come to appreciate it some day.
khead1
Fuck you Frank Miller.
Makes me glad I bought Daredevil #181 for a quarter from some dumbass at a yard sale.
WereBear (itouch)
It’s foreign policy night.
I have chosen to watch Rage of the Yeti on Syfy instead. As an offering that will contain more intelligence and reasoning.
G
I can’t stand to watch the GOP debates, so I don’t. From the highlight reels I’ve seen, the debates seem to be a great way to drive independant voters to reelect Obama. With wanting Obama to be a two-termer… I hope they have a debate once a week for the next 6 months
Cat Lady
You know how there’s only so much talent, beauty, intelligence etc. in the universe, and some people get more than their fair share? I’ve figured out where Rick Perry’s share of smarts and clue-buying ability went – Charlie Pierce. He’s drinking all of their milkshakes, and like Tina Fey saved the world from Palin by ridiculing her, wait until only Romney is left standing in Charlie’s crosshairs. A lot of people here in Massachusetts have stories to tell, and Charlie is the one to tell them. He’s only getting started.
General Stuck
You’ll catch a disease watching that shit
aliasofwestgate
Getting my weekly dose of japanese tokusatsu for the weekend. Loving every MINUTE of it. Best crack in the world, and more fun than sports. Monsters, explosions and brawls. :D
c u n d gulag
“…and Gingrich because ersatz-erudition blowing out of a guy who looks like a Macy’s Parade balloon designed by Thomas Nast is no way to go through life, son.)…”
Ouch! THAT hurts!!!
And one of the greatest political take-downs of ALL time!!!
Too bad Newt and Conservatives have an IRONY deficiency, or else they might actually enjoy that GREAT line!!!!
Thoughtful Black Co-Citizen
I’d say we need to find a way to weaponize this man’s prose, but then he’d have to go to jail for murder.
Ka-Boom.
Baron Jrod of Keeblershire
So, uh, Occupy Portland is scheduled to be raided tonight at midnight. The occupiers has vowed to stay put and the mayor and police chief have implied that violence will be used to clear the park.
I guess that story isn’t half as interesting as Republican debate #5769 or whatever stupid fucking game is happening, but… yeah. People are likely to get hurt tonight in Portland.
srv
I hope the each candidate will be asked to say yes or no to Vouchers for Veterans.
ImJohnGalt
Oliver Stone is chatting with Paul Krugman and Nick Kristof at the table next to mine. Oh, to be a wiretap in the salt shaker between them.
realbtl
I’d call for robo-watching of the debate but it probably (or at least should) violate one of Issac Asimov’s rules.
General Stuck
I get it. Herman is experiencing his second childhood, where he gets to skip the light fandango with a serendipitous op to be GI Joe, OR, GI Herman, as it were, and tear ass around the world kicking everybodies ass. Or, at least ordering others to do that like a good wingnut. Life is like a box of chocolates. Every day, the dude sounds more and more like an evil Forrest Gump.
cathyx
@ImJohnGalt: For real? Drop your napkin near them and listen in.
schrodinger's cat
I have not watched a single one of these various iterations of the clown show. Will watch when the Republicans have a nominee, who I think is going to be Mitt Romney.
Steeplejack
@Anne Laurie:
Oh, hell, no. I just got home from work a while ago, my dogs are barking–by which I mean my feet are very tired–and I am going into night-owl chillaxin’ mode. Looks like pizza and multimedia tonight, possibly including football on TV, something from the DVR, catching up on the Balloon Juice threads and maybe even some window-shopping on line for some much-needed computer equipment.
Oh, and fluid-replacement therapy.
Steep +½
General Stuck
LINKY for #16
PurpleGirl
Hey, the subject being foreign policy, the schedulers only planned it to be 1 hour. At least that’s what the on-line TV guide I use have it down for.
Still not gonna watch.
ruemara
I will be finishing off Shannox and working on the big fire bird thing. While indulging in the more highbrow entertainments of Rage of the Yeti. Because even a pissed off Yeti is a better presidential choice than these yahoos.
robertdsc-PowerBook
I got sidetracked from finishing MW3 by the Metal Gear Solid HD Collection. This thing is a winnar, folks. Love being able to play MGS3 in HD.
As for the GOP “debate”, this is by far the worst subject for these morons to take on considering POTUS can whip out the Osama & Gaddafi cards at any time. New START for those of us who like those kinds of things is a plus, also too.
Dr. Loveless
Oh, man. I had completely forgotten about Hugh Hewitt and the awe-inspiring courage he displayed in sitting on his ass in a comfy Empire State Building office. Thank you, Balloon Juice, for making me laugh at conservative chickenhawks … again.
Dee Loralei
My liver threatened to runaway from home if I partake in any Republican debate drinking game, so not watching any of them. The high(low)lights are enough to make my liver hurt.
Maude
@Baron Jrod of Keeblershire:
The NY Post is fanning the flames against OWS. The residents of the park area don’t like them smelly, dirty, dangerous intruders. Mayor Bloomberg isn’t taking any kind of stand.
dmsilev
I proved mathematically this morning that the GOP candidate who is trending up right now is None of the Above. Once Gingrich implodes, he/she/it will take the lead.
(link)
dmsilev
@realbtl:
No, not at all true. Under Asimov’s Laws of Robotics, humans could order robots to do anything, including fry their own brains, and the robots would obey. Indeed, one could argue that the First Law would require a robot to watch the debate in lieu of a human.
Gin & Tonic
Another shoe drops as The Citadel joins PSU in the pederasty Hall of Fame.
gnomedad
Whichever of these guys Obama beats (please God), the explanation will be that he “wasn’t conservative enough”; doubly so for Romney. By the way, Mittster, how’s that surrender to terror thing goin’ for ya?
Gex
@Baron Jrod of Keeblershire: So they are announcing ahead of time that they will use violence? That’s unlikely to help them in any lawsuits after the fact. Now the attorneys can credibly argue that their client wasn’t doing anything when the cop went medieval on the client’s ass, and the client had done nothing illegal. The cops own statements indicate that is entirely plausible.
Ruckus
If I watched I have to carve out both eyeballs with a grapefruit spoon. If I watched and listened I have to do the eyeball spoon thing and then an icepick in each ear.
Either that or start drinking again. Heavily.
Neither of these is an option if I want to keep my sanity and/or blood flow intact so I think I’ll walk the dog, have dinner and make believe there is no rethuglican party.
Mike in NC
Enough of these phony debates. Just give the nomination to the first of these mutants who’d be willing to bite the head off a live chicken.
Gex
@General Stuck: He’s going to make sure China doesn’t get the bomb!
lamh35
Saw Immortals tonite. beautifully filmed and the fight sequences were fantastic. story was meh, but still an enjoyable way 2 spend time.
Ruckus
@Mike in NC:
Some of these clowns sound insane enough they’d bite the head off a live child to get elected.
scav
@Mike in NC: First to be willing? First to battle their way to the tattered corpse more likely.
Jay
“Reagan’s Balls, California.”
ROFL. Copter.
El Cid
Not to mention that Newt Gingrich was summarily tossed out of his Speaker position — the authoritarian right movements have never too much cared for those showing individual weakness and defeat. Interrupts their fantasies of martial values. (Paging VDH!)
Baron Jrod of Keeblershire
@Maude: I’m talking about Portland, Oregon, a city 3000 miles from New York. That’s why I said Occupy Portland and not Occupy Wall Street.
@Gex: Well, they’re not stupid enough to explicitly announce the use of violence, but a line from Mayor Adams in this interview jumped out at me: “…our goal with this movement was to deal with it in a nonviolent way, and I feel we have to a great degree up to this point.”
The Dangerman
Foreign policy debate? Fuck, how many different ways can they say “Israel is our bestest friend”, “Obama apologizes for America”, “Christians good, Muslims bad”, or “must nuke Iran”? It’s going to be like a skipping record (younger generation will have to look up what a skipping record is).
8pm EST is a good football game between the Cardinal (kinda like Newt’s nose) and the Ducks. No one will watch.
cathyx
The last several days have been bad for me electronically. My phone and my computer. Some constellation pertaining to electronic things must be in retrograde. And the worst thing about these kind of problems is that I don’t know much about electronic things so I always have to seek out expert help and I don’t know anyone personally.
The Dangerman
@soonergrunt:
How do I get your job?
Seriously, the thought of building high end rigs and seeing what breaks them is ridiculously cool.
South of I-10
I think I’ll stick with football, it’s less likely to cause a brain injury. Update on my dog – she stayed at the vet last night, her temp got up to 106. Doc doesn’t know why. Bloodwork is normal, he x-rayed her chest and abdomen and didn’t see anything. Started IV fluids and steroids earlier today and she is responding. Her temp is down to 103 and she ate a little. Y’all keep your fingers crossed for my elder statesman.
WereBear (itouch)
@Gin & Tonic: It has occurred to me that when they aren’t stopped, pedophiles do keep going, and their offenses become worse, and less explanable.
So when Penn State let it go as “horseplay” they kept categorizing it that way in their head; even as the offenses got more serious.
This whole thing needs to be studied as an example of how these things gets way out of hand. But I doubt it will.
freddie
@South of I-10: You’re not in the Red Tide zone on the Gulf?
South of I-10
@Freddie I’m approximately 25-30 miles from the gulf if you draw a straight line (really Vermilion Bay).
freddie
@South of I-10: You guys didn’t get any Red Tide up there, did you? Corpus here. I know it went up to Galveston at one point.
Hewer of Wood, Drawer of Water
What the hell is with the Maryland uniforms?
Violet
The Guardian is live blogging the debate, as usual. A delicious taste:
South of I-10
@freddie: I don’t think so? But honestly, I’m not sure.
SiubhanDuinne
Just announced “eight candidates, 90 minutes.” I’ll watch until I finish my sandwich.
Edit: last half hour is streaming only.
oldswede
Great cartoon by Danziger: Sarah whacking Perry, telling him to write it on his hand, stupid. Nov 11 2011 – Sarah Palin, Rick Perry, political cartoon
Gex
@Baron Jrod of Keeblershire: Ooh. That’s some nice work they did there with the wording.
Gex
@WereBear (itouch): To reiterate: they don’t stop. My girlfriend was raped from ages 5 – 15 by her stepfather. This is another case where people knew and didn’t act. She’s now 43, in therapy for the first time, and learned that if the stepfather wasn’t dead, they’d still be required to report him. The reporter laws implicitly acknowledge the continued danger, even beyond the statute of limitations.
soonergrunt
@The Dangerman: Well, my day job is as an IT tech at the VA Medical Center in OKC. It’s a lot of fun, if somewhat routine. My fun-fun-fun job of building high end rigs is doing custom builds for a couple of the screwdriver shops in south OKC. I come in and help them out from time to time. I build and burn in the systems prior to delivery. This is all to feed my own junkie-like habit.
Gromit
I clicked on the townhall.com link in the Charlie Pierce piece, and the big ad in the sidebar has a photo of empty supermarket shelves and the headline “41 Things You Should Hoard”. If the folks reading that site aren’t already insane, they are most definitely being driven there.
Arclite
@soonergrunt: The 6970 is serious graphics power for serious $$$. Battlefield 3 or Skyrim would look GORGEOUS on that. Do you play either of those SG?
Palli
Huntsman, the stealth Koch appointee; he had assurances fron on high or he never would have left China.
Kathy in St. Louis
“because ersatz-erudition blowing out of a guy who looks like a Macy’s Parade balloon designed by Thomas Nast is no way to go through life, son.)…
Best description of Newtie ever…
Should go in the Simile Hall of Fame.