Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

People are weird.

The lights are all blinking red.

Not all heroes wear capes.

“Jesus paying for the sins of everyone is an insult to those who paid for their own sins.”

Insiders who complain to politico: please report to the white house office of shut the fuck up.

If West Virginia and San Francisco had a love child.

Bad people in a position to do bad things will do bad things because they are bad people. End of story.

I desperately hope that, yet again, I am wrong.

You come for women, you’re gonna get your ass kicked.

Republicans in disarray!

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

Ah, the different things are different argument.

So it was an October Surprise A Day, like an Advent calendar but for crime.

I know this must be bad for Joe Biden, I just don’t know how.

Jack be nimble, jack be quick, hurry up and indict this prick.

Everything is totally normal and fine!!!

Maybe you would prefer that we take Joelle’s side in ALL CAPS?

Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in morse code.

Democrats are back in array!

Conservatism: there are people the law protects but does not bind and others who the law binds but does not protect.

rich, arrogant assholes who equate luck with genius

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

I also would like a pony to improve my balloon juice experience.

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79Comments

  2. 2.

    JPL

    Although I like Brees, as a Falcon fan I must cheer for the Lions. Brees and crew manage to make us play like idiots. Of course, we have to end the Giants season or it won’t matter who wins.

    also, too… I’m using us and we loosely but whatever.

  5. 5.

    FlipYrWhig

    I think when we have no personal connection to either team we should pull for the team whose city is the worse dystopian hellscape. This one is difficult.

  7. 7.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    Go the under-Lions, even though I still think the Saints will win this one.

  8. 8.

    Villago Delenda Est

    Yeah, have to root for the Lions, if only because Lion fans have been punished long enough. Longer than Cub fans.

    There is no statute of limitations on punishing Yankee fans, though.

  10. 10.

    Suffern ACE

    @Villago Delenda Est: Yeah, unlike long suffering Cubs fans, I have nothing against long suffering Lions fans. If a win in the first round makes them happy before they are emotionally crushed in Green Bay, more power to them.

  12. 12.

    Vodkamuppet

    As dystopian hellscapes go, New Orleans is a neophyte. My fair city has been a dystopian hellscape since long before I was born. Sports are all we have. Also, too, fuck the Yankees.

  13. 13.

    Dan

    Dear God, look at this abomination: http//www.rottentomatoes.com/m/ayn_rand_and_the_prophecy_of_atlas_shrugged_2012/trailers/11160659/

  17. 17.

    Mr Stagger Lee

    Detroit is playing like they want this game bad. The Saints know that this playoff right?

  21. 21.

    Vodkamuppet

    Gotta score on this, gotta score, gotta score, gotta score, I need a drink, gotta score…fucking comercial, gotta go smoke.

  22. 22.

    Mr Stagger Lee

    @Dan: Theatres better have extra cleaning supplies and hazmat suits. Otherwise the Paulbots will turn the place into a icky place.

  28. 28.

    JPL

    @Nethead Jay: I was going to say it was the team GG wanted but that’s just to mean..
    Who really cares who he wants.. I’m still going to cheer for who I want and others are going to cheer for who they want.

  34. 34.

    The Dangerman

    Maybe the Yankees can swing a deal for John Lackey, thereby increasing their Fucked Quotient.

  35. 35.

    Nethead Jay

    @JPL: Hah. Not likely, but since I’m still extremely angry with him and a bunch of other people here for siding with Greenwald and co. in that disgusting episode and ABL leaving, it’s fitting.

  36. 36.

    J. Michael Neal

    I’m exhausted. After an unbelievably intense 3-3 tie last night (fuck shootouts), the Gophers scored once in the first tonight and then made it stand up. Wisconsin had chances, but we controlled the game. I hate the phrase usually, but the Gophers imposed their will.

    The Badgers, #1 team in the country, quit in the third. On one shift with about six minutes left Amanda Kessel, whose calves aren’t any bigger than my forearms, knocked Madison Packer off the puck and then won a battle along the boards with Hillary Knight. That’s two of the strongest players in the country that she just beat physically.

    Wisconsin hasn’t been shutout in three years. Barring the Olympic year when they were missing Knight, Meghan Duggan and coach Mark Johnson, they hadn’t lost a season series to anyone since 2007-08. I have no idea when they last allowed more than 80 shots in a weekend.

    The Gophers take too many nights off against mediocre teams (the way they lost up in Bemidji back in November was disgraceful) to be put ahead of Wisconsin in the polls, but when they’re on, they may be the best team in the country. And I don’t think this team is going to take nights off against Wisconsin, Minnesota-Duluth, North Dakota or in the NCAA Tournament.

    I’ll be surprised if there aren’t two more games between Minnesota and Wisconsin this year: the WCHA final and the NCAA final, both in Duluth. Maybe Cornell can stop whoever they play in a semi, but there are four teams in the WCHA (Wisconsin, Minnesota, North Dakota and Duluth) that are better than any team Cornell will play this year, so who knows how good they actually are.

  37. 37.

    Steeplejack

    Any knife mavens want to weigh in on bamboo cutting boards? I have an end-grain maple cutting board that I like a lot, but someone gave me a pretty big bamboo board for Christmas. Trying to decide whether to put it into the regular rotation or quarantine it as a “cheese board” or for nominal use when that gift-giver comes over.

    I have a slightly negative impression of bamboo boards–I don’t know from where. The Google is ambiguous and conflicting.

  38. 38.

    WaterGirl

    @Steeplejack: I know bamboo is supposed to be awesome, environmentally, because bamboo grows a million inches a minute and replaces itself every 45 minutes. (poetic license with details, but concept is correct, I believe.)

    I have nothing constructive to say. Bamboo cutting boards creep me out. I would go for door #3, nominal use when gift-giver comes over.

  39. 39.

    Yutsano

    @Steeplejack: Alton doesn’t care for them. I personally love mine. They’re easier to maintain than the big cutting boards for me, but he thinks they’re too porous. Bamboo is much more sustainable than most woods suitable for cutting board use too.

  40. 40.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    @Yutsano: Fun fact about Alton Brown. He’s a member of a church that believes gay people can be “cured”.

  43. 43.

    Steeplejack

    @WaterGirl:

    Yeah, that’s what I’m thinking. Bamboo is allegedly “too hard” and doesn’t give against the knife enough, plus those evil Chinese glue the boards together with toxic chemicals.

    It’s not a big issue, because I already have the big maple board, which I love, but I know you can find an expert on almost any subject here at dear old Balloon Juice. Thought I would give somebody a chance to go into full blowhard mode.

    . . . Oh, Lord, the Saints are cranking it up. Graham was not covered at all on that touchdown just now.

  47. 47.

    malraux

    @Steeplejack: My general impression of them is that they aren’t as nice to work on as end grain wood, but better than “plastic”. Since the point of bamboo boards is that they are environmentally responsible, that is, you can feel ok about not destroying the world if you use it up, you might use it as your cooked meat board.

  48. 48.

    WaterGirl

    @Steeplejack: Who made the big maple board? I have always wanted one of those… It sounds like a solid chunk of maple rather than the kind that looks like a checkers board. Yes?

    Clearly my “bamboo creeps me out” was not the well-informed answer you were hoping for. That’s okay. :-)

  52. 52.

    Parmenides

    Saints line is holding something fierce and its not getting called. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

  53. 53.

    Svensker

    Well, looks like game over, unless something weird happens. I’m bailing.

    Good effort, Detroit. Next year!

  54. 54.

    Steeplejack

    @WaterGirl:

    No, I pretty much agreed with your recommendation to showcase it when the gift-giver comes over, with a small “on the other hand” nod to Yutsano about giving it a tryout. And I like Maraux’s suggestion to use it as a carving board. One side has gutters around the edge, so it would be good for that.

    The maple board was a lucky find at Target. It’s 16″ by 14″, a little over an inch thick. Was happy to get it for about $30.

    Any end-grain board is going to have some “checkerboard” effect, but on mine it’s subtle. The pieces are color matched, so it’s almost monochromatic, and the pieces are more rectangular than square. Next time I’m at Target I’ll look for it–my memory is that I was surprised when I first saw it, because I had been looking for a while, and I snapped it right up, so I don’t know if it’s an all-the-time thing–and check product number, price, etc.

  55. 55.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    Looks like the Lions have as much chance of coming back in this game as Mitt Romney has of developing a convincing human personality.

  58. 58.

    handy

    Well, looks like my Niners need to bear down againts Drew and the Saints. Gonna be a tall order.

  60. 60.

    BruceFromOhio

    @handy: Drew Brees and Aaron Rodgers are currently the best at QB in the NFL. Saints and Packers have explosive offenses and adequate defense to keep the opponent at bay. Whoever plays either team will have a tall order.

    Fucking awesome playoffs this year – good teams, good contests. I love January.

  63. 63.

    BruceFromOhio

    @Steeplejack: I like bamboo boards. There is definitely a difference in quality, so you have to try a few to find one you like: size, weight, thickness. MrsFromOhio got a pair from Target, a smaller “cheese board” size, and a larger one we use to cut the bread and do salad prep, and they have been in continuous service. We keep a bigger plastic one for the tough jobs involving large knives and meat, bamboo hasn’t held up as well for those tasks, in my experience.

    Wash simply, lots of water and little soap. Dry quickly after washing, don’t let a bamboo sit around wet, that’s the fastest way to destroy it.

    ETA: Upon discussion, MFO has admitted that “bamboo has a lifespan, it’s not built to last.” YMMV.

  65. 65.

    Steeplejack

    God help me, looks like the Psych rerun marathon on Ion for me now. I canna’ do the Repub debate, cap’n!

    And any thought I had of watching Saturday Night Live was killed by the NBC sports weasels relentlessly hyping it through both games tonight. Ugh. Fail stink.

  66. 66.

    Steeplejack

    @BruceFromOhio:

    Thanks for the input. The one I received as a gift is pretty big–12″ by 18″. It will get good use, probably as a cheese board and carving (and “hot meat resting”) board. I just don’t see it replacing my maple board for heavy chopping.

  67. 67.

    scarshapedstar

    Head down to Goodwill and buy that dress before the rush starts, Who Dats – WE GOIN TO THE BIG SHOW!

  69. 69.

    ogliberal

    My wife is from NO and my in-laws live there. Though I bleed Giant blue (I’m from Jersey), I’ve often rooted for the Saints. From what I’ve heard, Breez is a great guy, on top of being one of the best QBs in the league. Their running game killed Detroit tonight and two of the guys are dudea lucky to have NFL contracts while the third is 5′ 6″. (their Heisman guy, son of one of my beloved Giants, is on IR) Their four WRs have played their entire non practice squad careers in NO and their best WR is from my alma mater, Hofstra. (who, inexplicably, canceled football a couple years back) My FILs father (now deceased) waited on line to get season tickets for the Saints first season before the Superdome was even built. Sadly, my FIL, who inherited the tix, gave them up 2-years before thw SB win because he could rarely find someone to take them when he couldn’t go. (dude’s not exactly a tailgaiter) Payton’s a former Giant, too, so that helps.

    But as I’ve told my wife, head to head – as could happen this year – I’m with the Giants. Unfortunately, she’s convinced the kids to make the Giants #2.

  70. 70.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    @Steeplejack: I asked my brother the chef about boards, and he generally likes wooden boards the best; he likes the bamboo ones, but the type of wood isn’t that important. He told me that for him, the size of the board is most important, the bigger the better. Also, that you need to be careful about sanitizing the wooden ones, they’re harder than the plastic ones.

  71. 71.

    Yutsano

    @BruceFromOhio:

    Upon discussion, MFO has admitted that “bamboo has a lifespan, it’s not built to last.”

    They do, but if you care for them right they’ll last for years. Like wash them and dry them right away, clean stains off with coarse salt, and don’t use them for cutting meat on. Plus they’re inexpensive to replace and again come from an easily sustainable source. Having said that, I would LOVE an end cut block. I think there’s room for both kinds of plant material plus plastic for handling raw meats.

  73. 73.

    Corner Stone

    “Man, I got kids. You can’t do me like that.”
    ~ Prime Time on the late TD run by Foster

  76. 76.

    BruceFromOhio

    @Yutsano: That’s really how its broken down, and I didn’t think of the sanitary aspect until now, how we use them – no dairy or animal products on bamboo, its easier to keep clean. A good heavy wood (like maple or oak) can take the punishment of the astringents and harsh soaps like the plastic can. The bamboo has been relegated to chopping veggies, bread and serving up the munchies. Depends on what you’re chopping up, too – if I’m using the Freddy Krueger cleaver, it’s on the beat-up plastic board, things don’t slide around as much.

  79. 79.

    MiniVanVader

    Pulling hard hard hard for the G-Men. In my fantasy world, they’ll go on to beat GB, leading to a home game for Nola in the NFCCG.

    Plus, fuck the Dirty Birds.

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