…Please, oh please, do not let the Style section editor assign or publish anything to do with politics.
Consider the latest atrocity. In it, a group profile of four out of the five Romney sons, we learn that:
They stump for him across the country as surrogates; they offer a square-jawed, Christmas-card-ready backdrop for him onstage; and they telling humanizing “Dad” stories, as well as recite his basic talking points. The Romney boys: charming, amusing and relentlessly on message.
“I think one thing we offer is a perspective on his character,” Matt said.
And there’s more:
They have developed a set of habits and rituals to tolerate life on the campaign trail. The ultrafit brothers work out together, sometimes swimming in the hotel pool. On primary nights or after debates, they often split chocolate shakes with their parents as they await the returns.
You can shoot me any time now.
This is the worst kind of “journalism” — a piece based on interviews only with the principals, presenting an “as told to” portrait of people trying to persuade American voters to trust their family enterprise with enormous power. If children are relevant to the potential presidency of Romney or anyone else, then something much more is needed; if they are not, then this is at once free advertising for one candidate…plus a pure distraction from the real question: is that self-made-son serving as the representative from Plutocracy, M. Willard Romney, fit to be president?
Oh — and you’d have thought that this might have sparked something like a reporter’s (or, really, an editor’s) news sense:
Though the sons say that they’re only focused on helping their father win the presidency, politics may be in their future. In 2008, Josh considered a Congressional run in his home state, Utah, and Mr. Romney introduced him at his campaign headquarters in December by saying, “He really should be the politician in the family, not me.”
Friends and aides, as well as Mr. Romney himself, say that Tagg, who now manages a hedge fund, also has the interest and the talent for public office.
Given the Bush experience, and the news that Joseph Kennedy III is considering a run in the Congressional district now represented by Barney Frank, you’d think there’s your lede. What makes a forty-something hedge fund (sic!) operator a potential political leader? His dad and grand dad, of course, combined with a mountain of wealth his father’s candidacy aims to protect at all costs. You’d have thought a piece on the resurgence of the phenomenon of hereditary political dynasties in American politics might be worth a look – and the Romney clan makes that an easy story to develop. At worst, you’d get more out of such a piece than the revelation that “everyone is afraid to fall asleep on the bus right now, because everyone knows Josh has smelling salts, just waiting for someone to doze off.”
Did I mention you can shoot me now?
The selection of a president is a real challenge; this article, (and, to be fair to its, to my eyes, feckless reporter, many others) frames it with all the gravitas of the old Family Feud game show. Which, of course, is a feature not a bug, if the goal is to let Romney’s fellow class warriors make their choice, unencumbered by interference from those inconvenient upstarts — you know, American citizens.
To channel my inner Brad DeLong: Why oh why can’t we have a better press corps?
Image: Paul Cézanne, Bathers, 1890-92
JPL
Do they all have family dogs?
burnspbesq
Oh, I think the part about the sons offering a perspective on the father’s character is entirely accurate. It’s not a flattering perspective, but …
rlrr
“The ultrafit brothers work out together, sometimes swimming in the hotel pool.”
It would be difficult to impossible to get any kind of workout in most hotel pools.
burnspbesq
I hate this. This is tone-deaf, short-sighted, and every other adjective along those lines you can think of.
http://espn.go.com/new-york/ncb/story/_/id/7438916/nfl-allow-siena-saints-simulcast-new-york-giants-game
Larkspur
@JPL: Yeah. Maybe the sons should talk more, like all day every day. There might be another “humanizing Dad story” there to rival the one about Seamus the dog. Or maybe a cute humanizing story about how Mitt moved into the unfinished basement of one of his son’s houses so that Mitt could kinda sorta meet residency requirements. There might have been sleeping bags and S’mores involved. Talk more, Mittlings!
SiubhanDuinne
Well, and didn’t the NYT article mention the new Twitter feed set up by Huntsman’s daughters? Huh?
Shawn in ShowMe
Was this article written for voters or their 14 year old surburban daughters?
Maude
Another problem is that the Presidency is a jumping off point to make scads of money. Not bad, along with the pension and benefits for former presidents.
Mark K
“Why oh why can’t we have a better press corps?”
Because they are paid not to be any better. Its so obvious.
Check out Mr. Pierces latest accurate piece on that joke of a rigged debate:http://www.esquire.com/blogs/politics/new-hampshire-debate-analysis-6634955
and the headline in the “liberal” NY Times: http://www.nytimes.com/2012/01/09/us/politics/romney-is-the-main-target-in-a-caustic-gop-debate.html?_r=1&hp
Its all rigged. If not for the internet, I’d join you in a shoot ourselves suicide pact.
Shawn in ShowMe
@SiubhanDuinne:
Mom, can we PLEAAASE vote for Mitt Romney or Jon Hunstman? Their kids are like, so cool.
Nellcote
No mention of the birther “joke” I take it.
What’s up with the instant Joe Kennedy hate? Is it just because he’s a Kennedy? If he wasn’t a Kennedy but had the same pov/record would he be worthy of consideration?
PurpleGirl
@Shawn in ShowMe:
Why would a 14-year-old suburban girl be reading the NYT?
waratah
@Shawn in ShowMe: Hedge funds also?
Jim, Foolish Literalist
About a month ago, an NYT article, I believe in the Sunday magazine, said that one of the lessons the campaign learned from ’08 was to downplay the boys’ role, saying they radiated a preppy entitlement that alienated voters. I think that was the smarterer reporter.
Tom Levenson
@Nellcote: No hate; just noting the fact that dynasties occur on our side of the aisle too. Joe 3 maybe an exemplary candidate. But he’s only plausible as one at this point because of his name and parentage.
burnspbesq
@Nellcote:
Joe Kennedy, Sr. was the first head of the SEC, appointed by FDR. That pretty much makes him, if not the Antichrist (that role is currently being played by Preet Bharara), the Anti-John the Baptist for the hedge-fund and private-equity crowd.
nancydarling
I get what you did with that Cezanne painting. This is about tongue baths, isn’t it?
elaine benes
Speaking of politicians kids, I just came across this:
“Bristol Palin—once the daughter of a “promising” politician and a Dancing with the Stars “star”—is now working as an assistant at a dermatologist’s office in Wasilla, Alaska. That’s probably for the best, since there was nowhere for her to go but down in Hollywood. Of course all traces of her former life aren’t totally gone—she and her son are living “in an apartment under her mom’s TV studio.”
What happened to the house in AZ?
Shawn in ShowMe
@PurpleGirl:
Dunno, maybe this was intended for Tiger Beat and the web person logged into the wrong server.
fasteddie9318
It is my hope that, one day, my sons Grunt, Man, and Zzorn-pla-ord will follow in my footsteps and comment on political internet sites. I like to dream big.
burnspbesq
@PurpleGirl:
This suburban boy started reading the Times when he was 11. My dad was a Herald Tribune guy, but when it went away we started having the Times delivered.
scav
@Shawn in ShowMe: O GSD, an electioneering justin beiber mitten-kittens cuteoff with media-approved imprimatur. slight pause — gunshot heard off-stage
Violet
@rlrr:
That is so true. Hotel pools are generally made for lounging. Lap pools they are not.
Benjamin Franklin
‘Nuff said.
burnspbesq
@Violet:
Hotel pools are good for working on your flip turns, as you get one every three strokes.
Mustang Bobby
I am told that there a number of tweets and speculations about which one of the Romney boys is “the gay one.” Not that there’s anything wrong with that, and I could not care less, but when you read about such manly and squeaky-clean Mormon boys being so gosh-darn nice and family oriented, there’s a Lifetime Movie of the Week with Treat Williams and Markie Post in there somewhere.
Violet
@burnspbesq: I’m sure there’s a Santorum joke in there somewhere.
But yeah, you can practice your flip turns if the shallow end doesn’t have steps all the way across so that you can’t reach the wall. And if there are no other people in the pool, because if there are you’ll hit them while trying to use the pool for actual swimming.
eemom
Mr Levenson, what you need is a dip in TBogg’s Sunday Five Brothers Blogging archives from ’08. I think you would find it most refreshing.
Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason
@Nellcote: Not because he’s a Kennedy, but because of the III after his name.
Time for the whole clan (and all the other clans) to get off the public tit for a generation or two. Once we’ve forgetten who they are, the subsequent generation can try running for office with no advantages except enormous passed-down wealth.
Oh, and legacy Ivy League admissions.
ruemara
@elaine benes: this story does warm the cockles of my heart. And what did happen to the house in AZ, the BLAH boyfriend in H-wood, the Candies abstinence money, the PAC money, the advertising career. Where’s the source for the Bristol’s new career path, because it’s too far away from how the modern infamy society works.
eemom
@Mustang Bobby:
I was thinking the same thing — something along the lines of the twin doctors played by Jeremy Irons in Dead Ringers.
burnspbesq
Time for NFL/FA Cup open thread.
Violet
@ruemara:
Bristol is incredibly boring. On DWTS she was a complete snooze when they’d try to talk to her after her dance or whatever. Or she would be cutting, snide and rude. Not a lot of likeability there. It baffled me that anyone thought she could carry a reality show. Who would even watch her besides rabid Sarah Palin fans trying anything to prop up Sarah’s flagging career?
And then when Sarah decided not to run for President, any possible reason for putting Bristol on TV or in front of a camera at all just flew out the window. I wouldn’t be surprised if her Hollywood prospects completely dried up after that.
Some kids of famous people have enough talent and charisma of their own to have their own career. Bristol Palin is not one of them.
The Moar You Know
Always nice to see the Grey Lady bust out the kneepads and do what she does best.
dmsilev
I’m not going to read the article, but what happened to the fifth son? Were there cutbacks at RomFamCo and his position was eliminated or something?
Violet
@dmsilev:
I read it so you don’t have to:
Sounds like the only sane one.
dr. bloor
I can’t wait to see what Tbogg does with this piece. Family workouts, splitting chocolate shakes…all the wholesomeness of Malkin in a cheerleader’s outfit.
Keith G
It seems like a standard style section soft news celebrity family profile. This could well be the start of a shift in the way Romney is covered by the media. As he becomes the de facto winner, the change in coverage will be from his problems to his strengths. That happens to all successful candidates. Then sometime after that, the stories turn back to a campaign in trouble. It’s the way an unimaginative media works
dmsilev
@Violet: Thanks. Too bad the explanation wasn’t more interesting.
Nutella
I like to use the wording “his daddy and grand-daddy, of course” to make the juvenile dependence more obvious.
Raven
go falcons
SiubhanDuinne
It is probably just a hiccup in my device or ISP, but I’m not seeing the pretentious douchey painting associated with this post.
nancydarling
@SiubhanDuinne: Too bad for you! It has bare butts and everything.
Shawn in ShowMe
@SiubhanDuinne:
Yum, new thread tag.
Raven
@Shawn in ShowMe: Yea, it’s called NFL Playoff Open Thread!
nancydarling
@Raven: Your petulance is showing.
And Shawn, do you live in Missouri?
burnspbesq
@Tom Levenson:
“But he’s only plausible as one at this point because of his name and parentage.”
I think not. If a handsome and well-spoken 31-year-old deputy DA, with degrees from Stanford and Harvard Law and Peace Corps experience, expressed interest in running for Barney’s seat, he would quickly garner financial and other support, even if his name was Finbar Shaughnessy, Anthony Matarazzo, or DeAndre Lewis.
The Kennedy name is an advantage, but it’s neither a necessary nor a sufficient condition.
demz taters
It may be crappy reporting, but it sure does a good job of encapsulating the creepiness that they radiate. Are the editors that tone-deaf or is it a subtle hit job?
Raven
@nancydarling: Her name was MaGill and she called herself Lil but everyone knew her as. . .
Shawn in ShowMe
@nancydarling:
Yes ma’am. That makes me a certified expert on the inevitable 2020 GOP nominee, Kurt Warner.
BruceFromOhio
Moar wealthy family political dynasty. Yay! Think I’ll buy me a football team.
Li’l style section editor or whoever had the task of hanging with Le Posse de Romney has no choice but to softball it anymore. If some jounralist ever got it in his or her head to do follow-ups, ask questions or get an alternative (Gaia help us opposing) perspective, it’s immediately labelled a “hit piece” by the “liberal media” and summarily ignored for the remainder of mankind’s history, the writer jettisioned from the payroll, and an apology written by the publisher.
I cn haz nfl open thread now? kthxbai.
nancydarling
@Raven: Okay,Raven, I’m not getting it.
Mino
I wonder if Mitts will continue the federal salary freeze if he’s elected? Since so many of his co-religionists are in the FBI, CIA and SS. It’s probably the #1 career choice for college educated Mormon males.
Richard S
The NYTimes hasn’t shown any hint of editing in more than a decade – why should they start now? I stopped home delivery in 1999 – only subscribe for the puzzle on line now.
Raven
@nancydarling:
Rocky Raccoon checked into his room
Only to find Gideon’s bible
Rocky had come equipped with a gun
To shoot off the legs of his rival
His rival it seems had broken his dreams
By stealing the girl of his fancy.
Her name was Magil and she called herself Lil
But everyone knew her as Nancy.
Silver
@Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason:
I’m in the same boat. Fuck the Kennedys.
Especially RFK Jr. and his birther-esque vaccine act.
nancydarling
@Shawn in ShowMe: Is he as bad as Arkansas pols? I think we are losing our battle with AL/LA/TX/MS etal for “nuttiest state legislators” to New Hampshire. Rachel said the other night that a NH legislator introduced a law requiring all legislation include its basis in the Magna Carta.
JGabriel
Tom Levenson @ Top:
Arent’t the articles in the Style section typically free advertising for their most profitable patrons?
.
JPL
@Raven: Did you see the story in the AJC about the school in Gwinnett county sending home a math assignments about slaves? link
If you have two idiot teachers and one teaches 30 students and the other teaches 20, how many students are they teaching?
SiubhanDuinne
@Shawn in ShowMe:
I wish it were original, but it’s not. Some troll a few months ago called Tom a “pretentious douchey art-lover” or something of the sort. Tom ran with it, changed his handle for a couple of weeks and everything!
Raven
@JPL: A regular commenter on the Athens Banner Herald sit I expect. It’s s fucking online Klan rally every day.
MikeJ
@burnspbesq:
But Sherlock starts in an hour and a half.
Shawn in ShowMe
@JPL:
Wait a minute, let me get a pencil …
Davis X. Machina
I expect a certain amount of interest in the royal family in a country where 60% of the electorate at least — and they’re not all on the right, mind you — go to the polls every four years to elect a king.
Mino
@nancydarling: You’re in no danger unless Congressman Gohmert dies or retires.
SiubhanDuinne
@JPL: I saw that and was beyond horrified. One question was about how many slaves it would take to pick fruit from a number of trees, but the one that had me almost screaming was, if a slave is whipped twice a day, how many whippings does he get in a week. I mean JESUS CHRIST ON A DINOSAUR, Norcross schools. This is how you try to reinforce history class in the math lessons? The mind has boggled all the way off the shelf at this point.
becca
So what’s the deal with the fifth Romney clone? Is he out missionarying or something?
WaterGirl
@JPL:
Fixed.
It’s unbelievable. They never stop.
Shawn in ShowMe
@nancydarling:
Nah, I was just kidding. Kurt Warner, former St. Louis Rams quarterback and eminently likable hero of the Christian right hasn’t even entered the political arena … yet.
If you want it bad enough, you gotta work for it.
JPL
@SiubhanDuinne: The news interviewed a father who complained and he said the hardest part for him was explaining to his child why he was so angry.
It’s nice to know that some parents still look at home work assignments. The principal said that she was going to review worksheets from now on. Why not hire someone with better judgment to begin with.
WaterGirl
@SiubhanDuinne: If that teacher isn’t fired, then I blame everyone. The teachers, the school, the principal, the school board, the community. Everyone.
Edit: I am hoping that somehow the Department of Justice, or Education, or something could step in. But I’m sure they can’t. Depressing.
JPL
@WaterGirl: If you can watch a video, here’s the local coverage on abc. link
The principal should be fired also,too.
nancydarling
@becca: He has a missionary position as a radiology resident somewhere.
@Shawn in ShowMe: We do try hard!
MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson
@WaterGirl:
If Rick Santorum enters into an intimate relationship with 17 dogs, Mitt Romney waterboards three of them and Newt Gingrich marries another, how many dogs will hunt in the GOP race?
Elizabelle
My problem with the Grey Lady today:
quoting David Addington — David Addington!! — in a story about Obama’s recess appointment.
David Addington. VP Cheney’s legal advisor, architect of legal cover for torture and enabling God knows what else Cheney did.
David Addington, who, in a better world, would be in The Hague dealing with his own legal troubles at the moment.
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/01/08/us/politics/experts-say-obamas-recess-appointments-could-signify-end-to-a-senate-role.html?ref=us&pagewanted=all
Yes. It is flabbergasting and, to be honest, a little chilling. To see David Addington quoted as a legal “expert” in the nation’s paper of record.
Mark S.
Mitt went to Harvard Law School but seems unfamiliar with Griswold v. Connecticut.
Shawn in ShowMe
@MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson:
That’s easy. Twenty-seven percent of them.
phoebes-in-santa fe
The NYT had a similar puff piece on Ann Romney about a month ago. I was waiting for the next shoe to drop, and a piece be written on the five sons. They’re all barely human.
I wonder if political writer would have asked about the dog-on-car scandal and what “the boys” would have said about it.
Hill Dweller
The new talking point(per TPM) from Republicans is Bain laying off people for their own personal financial gain is the same thing as Solyndra going bankrupt.
MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson
@Shawn in ShowMe:
I am sorry, Shawn, but your answer was incorrect. Our Rasmussen Kool-Aid Correct Response was 72%.
Yutsano
@Mark S.: Oops. Another glitch in the Romneybot3000 programming.
Mike in NC
Maybe they could form a barbershop quartet and appear on the Lawrence Welk Show.
It’s going to be bad enough when the Osmonds start providing the entertainment at Mitt rallies, since Hank Williams Jr. wouldn’t get the nod.
Cacti
The Romney boys: spoiled, creepy, little clones of their daddy.
Kolohe
You’d have thought a piece on the resurgence of the phenomenon of hereditary political dynasties in American politics might be worth a look
Though ‘Resurgence’ implies that it ever left: Adams, Harrison, Roosevelt, Taft, Rockefeller, Kennedy, Bush – I can’t think of a period of American History significant absent of a least one major political family (and normally several)
WaterGirl
@MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson: Now that’s a question I can approve of, though not for third graders!
@Shawn in ShowMe: Excellent answer!
Pat
A lot of the NYT front page (a piece on Romney’s hair) political articles and most of the editorial page (anything by Dowd or Collins) belongs in the Style section.
Librarian
I used to subscribe to the Sunday Times until I cancelled it a few years ago, when they hired Bill Kristol. I haven’t regretted it for a single second since.
Not Sure
@rlrr: I’m sure the pools in hotels frequented by the 1% are of more than sufficient size to do laps.
Scamp Dog
@SiubhanDuinne: The follow-up question I’d like to see is “how may crimes have you committed with these whippings?” I have 14 felonious assaults, 1 count of slaveholding, and I hope the attorneys out there can add to the indictment.
gogol's wife
@phoebes-in-santa fe:
They have been alternately puffing Romney and slashing at all the other candidates in turn on the front page (i.e., Romney’s hair followed by Cain’s sexual harassment followed by Romney’s frugality followed by Gingrich’s sleaze followed by Romney’s lovely wife followed by Santorum’s sleaze, etc.). It’s nauseating.
satch
Ashley Parker’s Times piece (she’s not related to Kathleen by any chance, is she? Sounds like it.) would have been great for Parade Magazine, except that David Gergen beat her to it about a month ago with his own Romney tongue bath, in which he reveals that one of the things Mitt and Ann like to do on a Sunday afternoon is “wrestle”. When you’re through with that gun, can I borrow it?
Citizen Alan
I am slightly nauseous after reading this — between the creepy description of the five Romney boys and the painting below it, I immediately started wondering whether there was any “Romney Boys” slash-fic floating around. Google says “no” but if the Romneybot wins, I assume it’s coming.
slag
Maybe the Romneys aren’t really running for President but are instead simply auditioning for Fox’s new reality series, Douchebags Breeding Douchebags.
Anne Laurie
@Violet:
Heh. “Within the family, Ann’s 1977/78 ‘temporary estrangement’ is never discussed, but she’s always been at pains to point out that Ben has been legally certified as Mitt’s genetic offspring. Also, ever since the unfortunate incident with the classroom gerbils in the microwave — thank Moroni the Belmont school system has the proper experience to deal with students who pursue even the most unusual learning styles! — everyone who knows the Romneys has been grateful he’s found a socially useful outlet for his less ordinary passions.” (/evilsnark)
Seriously, that’s the sad thing about the Five Bros: they had to grow up with Willard Romney as their all-powerful patriarch. Those ‘crazy eyes’ stares may just be the outward signs of PTSD…
Paul in KY
@Violet: Sounds like he’s the only one with a normal name too. Maybe he’s the Bishop’s kid?