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You are here: Home / Sports / NFL Open Thread

NFL Open Thread

by John Cole|  January 8, 20124:50 pm| 181 Comments

This post is in: Sports

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Steelers vs. Jeebus.

Go STEELERS!

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Previous Post: « The shape of things to come
Next Post: NFL Open Thread- John Cole’s Slow Motion Nightmare »

Reader Interactions

181Comments

  1. 1.

    JPL

    January 8, 2012 at 4:51 pm

    God Bless America.

  2. 2.

    Raven

    January 8, 2012 at 4:52 pm

    CS will be here shortly to explain everything.

  3. 3.

    Raven

    January 8, 2012 at 4:53 pm

    “Pretty good throw away by Tim Tebow”!!!!!!!!!!!

  4. 4.

    JPL

    January 8, 2012 at 4:53 pm

    John, Here’s a link to a luckovich cartoon about Tebow

  5. 5.

    Corner Stone

    January 8, 2012 at 4:54 pm

    Everything! Including how to not burn pots of food. Maybe a timeout would’ve helped you? Hmmmm??

  6. 6.

    BD of MN

    January 8, 2012 at 4:54 pm

    well, the Steelers have enough points to get to OT already…

  7. 7.

    Legalize

    January 8, 2012 at 4:54 pm

    Tebow’s first pass: a 37 footer in the dirt, and well outside of the intended receiver.

    Phil Simms: Pretty good throwaway by Tim Tebow.

  8. 8.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 4:55 pm

    Plucky Tim Three And Out versus the Pittsburgh Thugocracy?

    I wonder whether the Broncos will score as many as 9 points.

  9. 9.

    victory

    January 8, 2012 at 4:55 pm

    no one will see tebow until wednesday because steelers gonna kill to him!

  10. 10.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    January 8, 2012 at 4:56 pm

    Now is the time for all good secularists to root for Pittsburgh.

    Kickers do the Jeebus fingers after a fucking punt now?

  11. 11.

    Under the Aurora Freeway

    January 8, 2012 at 4:58 pm

    You know what the best part of this weekend’s games is?

    No Jets.

  12. 12.

    Under the Aurora Freeway

    January 8, 2012 at 4:58 pm

    You know what the best part of this weekend’s games is?

    No Jets.

  13. 13.

    BD of MN

    January 8, 2012 at 4:58 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: I’d rather think he was saying “did you see how high that went?”

  14. 14.

    different-church-lady

    January 8, 2012 at 4:58 pm

    Dear CBS graphics idiots:

    I KNOW THE FUCKING BALL IS ON THE 30. I DON’T NEED A GRAPHIC ON THE FIELD TELLING ME WHERE THE BALL IS! I CAN FREAKIN’ SEE THE BALL AND THE BIG NUMBER PAINTED ON THE FIELD THAT SAYS 30.

    Jesus, just let me see the FUCKING FIELD without all your god-damn hyperactive paint box bullshit!

  15. 15.

    The Dangerman

    January 8, 2012 at 5:00 pm

    Outside of a turnover, I think Denver may get skunked; game may already be over. Shit, might as well drink and pass out.

  16. 16.

    Joel

    January 8, 2012 at 5:00 pm

    Ten in the box!

  17. 17.

    Morbo

    January 8, 2012 at 5:01 pm

    Hoping for lulz over here.

  18. 18.

    geg6

    January 8, 2012 at 5:02 pm

    I hope good Christian Troy Polamalu absolutely flattens Jesus. I fucking HATE Jesus.

    Oh, and I love my Steelers.

  19. 19.

    Corner Stone

    January 8, 2012 at 5:02 pm

    Phil Simms is completely tanked for Tebow.

  20. 20.

    Yutsano

    January 8, 2012 at 5:03 pm

    @The Dangerman: “I felt a great disturbance in the Tebow. It was like millions of Jeebuses crying out in terror, then falling into silence.”

  21. 21.

    J.

    January 8, 2012 at 5:04 pm

    We’re one step closer to a Giants-Patriots Super Bowl rematch!

  22. 22.

    J.W. Hamner

    January 8, 2012 at 5:04 pm

    @Corner Stone:

    Hey, he made great throw on that screen pass.

  23. 23.

    Legalize

    January 8, 2012 at 5:04 pm

    @Under the Aurora Freeway:
    I’ll go one further: no Ryan brothers, i.e. “defensive geniuses”.

  24. 24.

    The Dangerman

    January 8, 2012 at 5:10 pm

    I wonder if one could get a prop bet in Vegas with total TD’s in Denver/Pittsburgh and LSU/Bama = Zero…

    …and I’m fucking out of beer (the games yesterday must have SUCKED).

  25. 25.

    JPL

    January 8, 2012 at 5:14 pm

    It’s fun watching a team kick field goals..just sayin Mike Smith…

  26. 26.

    Persia

    January 8, 2012 at 5:14 pm

    @Legalize: That was pretty special.

    If only Big Ben could just, you know, sit on the sidelines or something. As it is I just have to hope both quarterbacks choke.

  27. 27.

    geg6

    January 8, 2012 at 5:15 pm

    Apparently, Jesus’ team is infallible and cannot ever commit pass interference, no matter how many times they do.

  28. 28.

    LT

    January 8, 2012 at 5:15 pm

    The Steelers, the team representing Satan today, has 6 points. 6.

    I think you see where I’m going with this…

  29. 29.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 5:17 pm

    @LT:

    You mean a Herman Cain 9?

  30. 30.

    Svensker

    January 8, 2012 at 5:17 pm

    @Raven:

    Well you have to admit his analysis of the 1st game was right on.

  31. 31.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 5:17 pm

    @geg6:

    Apparently they can’t gain yards on offense either.

  32. 32.

    JPL

    January 8, 2012 at 5:18 pm

    @LT: And the broncos have what..about 6 yds so far..god is not happy..

  33. 33.

    LT

    January 8, 2012 at 5:18 pm

    8 total yards for the 1st quarter. That’s got to be a playoff record.

  34. 34.

    The Dangerman

    January 8, 2012 at 5:18 pm

    Amongst many deep thoughts…

    …each Coach that lost to Tebow should be fired before the sun sets (starting with Ryan). I think the Steelers had 11 in the box there.

  35. 35.

    Corner Stone

    January 8, 2012 at 5:19 pm

    Tebow’s gonna get all of those guys blown up.

  36. 36.

    Raven

    January 8, 2012 at 5:20 pm

    @Svensker: I do?

  37. 37.

    BD of MN

    January 8, 2012 at 5:20 pm

    so, what’s the over/under on the number of weeks Rob Schneider’s alleged sitcom lasts before cancellation? For Tebow’s sake that looks terrible….

  38. 38.

    LT

    January 8, 2012 at 5:20 pm

    @JPL: I see 6s everywhere in this game.

    Cue the Damien music…

  39. 39.

    LT

    January 8, 2012 at 5:21 pm

    Tebow has as really good QB rating after that pass…

  40. 40.

    LT

    January 8, 2012 at 5:23 pm

    Oh did Tomlin throw the red flag? (Can’t get the game here. “Watching” here. http://www.nfl.com/gamecenter/2012010800/2011/POST18/[email protected]#menu=drivechart&tab=track

  41. 41.

    burnspbesq

    January 8, 2012 at 5:23 pm

    @different-church-lady:

    I don’t think you are sufficiently fired up for this game.

    C’mon, let’s see some real intensity.

  42. 42.

    eastriver

    January 8, 2012 at 5:23 pm

    This game is a huge battle of Who Gives A Fuck?

    Jeebus vs Goobers.

    I might unhinge my jaw from yawning.

  43. 43.

    JPL

    January 8, 2012 at 5:23 pm

    well…duh…

  44. 44.

    edmund dantes

    January 8, 2012 at 5:24 pm

    Harrison is dirty. He’s going for the knee with his shoulder. A proper tackle would have your arms out to wrap up the guy.

    Dirty dirty player.

  45. 45.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 5:25 pm

    Tebow threw the ball? Successfully?

  46. 46.

    Corner Stone

    January 8, 2012 at 5:26 pm

    @edmund dantes: Harrison is a dirty POS. Has no business playing in the NFL.

  47. 47.

    Morbo

    January 8, 2012 at 5:26 pm

    Denver taking the lead is good for lulz, BTW.

  48. 48.

    J.W. Hamner

    January 8, 2012 at 5:26 pm

    Wow, that actually was a nice throw by Jesus.

  49. 49.

    Corner Stone

    January 8, 2012 at 5:26 pm

    What What What??

  50. 50.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 5:27 pm

    A B.. B… Broncos touchdown? I may have to reconsider my position on this god thing.

  51. 51.

    The Dangerman

    January 8, 2012 at 5:27 pm

    Seems to me like only 1 foot down prior to butt hitting OB.

    Edit: I guess I’m FOS as they confirmed it. Still, didn’t see the 2nd foot.

  52. 52.

    Karen in GA

    January 8, 2012 at 5:27 pm

    @MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson: Twice. Which should just about wrap it up for him today, I think.

  53. 53.

    edmund dantes

    January 8, 2012 at 5:28 pm

    Knee counts as two feet. It was down.

  54. 54.

    JPL

    January 8, 2012 at 5:28 pm

    Wow..Now is the time for me to finish my book..Tebow can throw sometimes.

  55. 55.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 5:28 pm

    Do we need to stage an intervention for Cole? I am concerned that he may have choked on his liberal latte.

  56. 56.

    Perfect Master

    January 8, 2012 at 5:29 pm

    @Under the Aurora Freeway: Oh yeah, What about the Pepsi commercial?

  57. 57.

    MikeBoyScout

    January 8, 2012 at 5:29 pm

    @45 edmund dantes:

    you’re dirty dude.

  58. 58.

    LT

    January 8, 2012 at 5:31 pm

    HOOOO. My god, this guy makes me laugh.

    And I can hear Cole’s stomach churning from across the world.

  59. 59.

    Polar Bear Squares

    January 8, 2012 at 5:32 pm

    Sorry John but eff tha Steelers, that serial rapist QB and that stupid urine-stained towel.

  60. 60.

    JPL

    January 8, 2012 at 5:33 pm

    @LT: I hate you..there are sixes all over…In fact look at tebow’s number 15..and a one and a five and what do you have…
    wallace who just caught this great pass..is seventeen..one minus seven…and ugh..
    It’s satan’s game

  61. 61.

    J.W. Hamner

    January 8, 2012 at 5:33 pm

    Was that a linebacker covering Mike Wallace? I’m no defensive coordinator but that seems a poor choice… though maybe the ball bounced.

  62. 62.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 5:34 pm

    @LT:

    I can hear Cole’s stomach churning from across the world.

    I think that’s Tunch purring, from where he has Cole pinned down under one colossal white paw.

  63. 63.

    Shawn in ShowMe

    January 8, 2012 at 5:34 pm

    @MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson:

    Then Bronco Jesus said to MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.”

  64. 64.

    The Dangerman

    January 8, 2012 at 5:35 pm

    @edmund dantes:

    Knee counts as two feet.

    OK, makes sense, thanks.

  65. 65.

    LT

    January 8, 2012 at 5:36 pm

    @JPL: heh heh heh

    EDIT: Oh holy crap – this is comment 66.

    [damien music crescendo…]

  66. 66.

    Joel

    January 8, 2012 at 5:37 pm

    Simms and Nance are horrible today.

    First, they missed the purpose of the Tomlin challenge. Decker clearly didn’t have control of the ball, and the challenge was obvious.

    Second, Nance talks about how this 3rd down play by the Steelers was whistled dead, but there was no whistle, nor was there a flag.

    Lastly, Phil Simms forgot to announce that he’s actually Tim Tebow’s mom.

  67. 67.

    phantomist

    January 8, 2012 at 5:37 pm

    Why does the score bug use yellow for Pitt, I think there’s a flag on every play.

  68. 68.

    MikeBoyScout

    January 8, 2012 at 5:38 pm

    @60 Polar Bear Squares:
    Envy is truly sorry. “stupid urine-stained towel“, well, that’s just pathetic.

  69. 69.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 5:40 pm

    @Shawn in ShowMe:

    And ExtremelyDisconcertedRainbowPerson said unto him:

    “Show me the scoreline in the fourth frickin’ quarter, O Lord, and then let’s talk about it.”

  70. 70.

    J.W. Hamner

    January 8, 2012 at 5:40 pm

    Holy Tebow!

  71. 71.

    Joel

    January 8, 2012 at 5:41 pm

    This is why you at least.. nominally.. commit to defending the pass.

  72. 72.

    LT

    January 8, 2012 at 5:41 pm

    omygod. tebow’s been sandbagging.

  73. 73.

    Maxwel

    January 8, 2012 at 5:41 pm

    Are you serious?

  74. 74.

    Corner Stone

    January 8, 2012 at 5:41 pm

    That was almost in-stride.

  75. 75.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 5:41 pm

    @J.W. Hamner:

    Are you bowing in the direction of Tebow-Mecca?

  76. 76.

    JPL

    January 8, 2012 at 5:41 pm

    Tunch must be pissed….

  77. 77.

    different-church-lady

    January 8, 2012 at 5:42 pm

    @burnspbesq:

    I don’t think you are sufficiently fired up for this game.

    WHAT FUCKING GAME? ALL I CAN SEE IS A BUNCH OF GRAPHICS!

  78. 78.

    JPL

    January 8, 2012 at 5:43 pm

    Tunch must be really pissed…

  79. 79.

    Corner Stone

    January 8, 2012 at 5:43 pm

    Nasty.

  80. 80.

    Maxwel

    January 8, 2012 at 5:43 pm

    Apparently the Steeler D left after the 1st quarter.

  81. 81.

    Clark Stooksbury

    January 8, 2012 at 5:43 pm

    You pissed Jeebus off.

  82. 82.

    different-church-lady

    January 8, 2012 at 5:43 pm

    Wait, wasn’t Tebow supposed to have a lousy arm?

  83. 83.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 5:44 pm

    After further review…

    Holy Fuck.

    Is anyone else wondering why the Denver QB has suspiciously long hair and a white robe and sandals?

  84. 84.

    Joe Bauers

    January 8, 2012 at 5:44 pm

    Cole, I hold you personally responsible if your boys can’t put down this pious, godbothering douchebag.

  85. 85.

    Joel

    January 8, 2012 at 5:44 pm

    Steelers got totally fooled on that QB draw. Well drawn-out, Fox.

  86. 86.

    Joel

    January 8, 2012 at 5:44 pm

    Steelers got totally fooled on that QB draw. Well drawn-out, Fox.

  87. 87.

    LT

    January 8, 2012 at 5:44 pm

    Holy fuck. I am going to FALL OVER. I mean literally.

  88. 88.

    The Dangerman

    January 8, 2012 at 5:45 pm

    8 yards in the 1st quarter to a relatively capable looking offense; shocked (and have thus delayed my beer run).

  89. 89.

    Corner Stone

    January 8, 2012 at 5:46 pm

    @different-church-lady:

    Wait, wasn’t Tebow supposed to have a lousy arm?

    He has a strong arm, but inconsistent motion and lousy accuracy.
    To be honest, he’s thrown the 3 best passes I’ve seen him throw all season.
    That 51 yarder down the side line was a bread box throw.

  90. 90.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 5:46 pm

    @Joe Bauers:

    Joe Lieberman is in the game?

  91. 91.

    Cacti

    January 8, 2012 at 5:46 pm

    Seriously, the Steelers didn’t see that QB draw coming?

    Seriously?

  92. 92.

    Templar-ish

    January 8, 2012 at 5:48 pm

    Its “Dogs” will.

  93. 93.

    BO_Bill

    January 8, 2012 at 5:48 pm

    A Belief in one of the Traditional religions of the West, instead of in Paul Krugman, is the reason that Tim Tebow is beating the Pittsburg Steelers.

  94. 94.

    J.W. Hamner

    January 8, 2012 at 5:49 pm

    A great interception there by Tebow.

  95. 95.

    Corner Stone

    January 8, 2012 at 5:49 pm

    Probably not the best result for Ben there.

  96. 96.

    The Dangerman

    January 8, 2012 at 5:49 pm

    Fuck, now I have to hope it’s not a blowout the other way; nice throw, asshole.

  97. 97.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 5:49 pm

    @BO_Bill:

    Which of the Celtic faiths are you referring to, Boob?

  98. 98.

    Maxwel

    January 8, 2012 at 5:49 pm

    Ignore the maroon.

  99. 99.

    Alan

    January 8, 2012 at 5:50 pm

    It’s starting to look like God hates the Steelers. Poor Rush Limbaugh.

  100. 100.

    eastriver

    January 8, 2012 at 5:50 pm

    This is pretty damn funny. Eh, JC?

    Hardy-fucking-har.

    Maybe there is a god…

  101. 101.

    LT

    January 8, 2012 at 5:50 pm

    Big Ben and Mike Tomlin are remembering every acid trip they ever took.

  102. 102.

    Joel

    January 8, 2012 at 5:50 pm

    Is it just me, or is Roethlisberger conveniently limping after throwing that horrid interception?

    Terrible call on James Harrison, for the record. One step then hit?

    I never imagined in my life that I would defend Harrison for anything, so there’s a first time for everything.

  103. 103.

    Yutsano

    January 8, 2012 at 5:51 pm

    @The Dangerman:

    and have thus delayed my beer run

    This is why the FSM invented halftime.

  104. 104.

    J.W. Hamner

    January 8, 2012 at 5:53 pm

    Even Teboow’s completions look like wounded ducks. But I guess it’s working.

  105. 105.

    CaseyL

    January 8, 2012 at 5:53 pm

    I just tuned in, and I think the neighbors heard me shriek “14 – 6 Denver??.”

    The lesson I take from this is that God prefers a Jeebus fanboi to a rapist.

  106. 106.

    Culture of Truth

    January 8, 2012 at 5:54 pm

    Stay calm. stay calm…

  107. 107.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 5:55 pm

    It seems that the Broncos have discovered Pittsburgh’s Achilles ankle….

  108. 108.

    The Dangerman

    January 8, 2012 at 5:56 pm

    @Yutsano:

    This is why the FSM invented halftime.

    And on the 8th day…

    Edit: I’ve lost the cool editing toolbar; is this a Chrome issue or did it just take the day off?

  109. 109.

    Bort

    January 8, 2012 at 5:56 pm

    They only got a FG because God doesn’t want a blowout so we all change the channel.

  110. 110.

    JPL

    January 8, 2012 at 5:56 pm

    @Culture of Truth: Tunch is not calm

  111. 111.

    Maxwel

    January 8, 2012 at 5:57 pm

    @eastriver:

    If there is a god Tebow would have been hit by a bolt after that awful 1st series when he came off pointing at the sky.

  112. 112.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    January 8, 2012 at 5:58 pm

    @Joel:

    Is it just me, or is Roethlisberger conveniently limping after throwing that horrid interception?

    I’m lucky* enough to be unable to pick up the local CBS affiliate’s signal here, so I was informed by the national radio broadcast, just before the pick, that one of the Stiller O-linemen rolled up on his QB’s bad ankle on the preceding play.

    *ETA: Phil Simms shouldn’t be calling P.S. 136’s intramural flag football games, let alone NFL games.

  113. 113.

    Morbo

    January 8, 2012 at 5:58 pm

    I am dying over here; this game is hilarious.

  114. 114.

    Tim F.

    January 8, 2012 at 5:58 pm

    I wonder whether Ben is on some serious pain pills.

  115. 115.

    CaseyL

    January 8, 2012 at 6:00 pm

    “That ankle does not have the ability to move and make the plays…”

    I love sportspeak.

  116. 116.

    Joel

    January 8, 2012 at 6:01 pm

    Carter with a Ryan Clark-style helmet-leading tackle.

  117. 117.

    Joe Bauers

    January 8, 2012 at 6:01 pm

    @MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson: There’s more than one of them, sadly.

  118. 118.

    burnspbesq

    January 8, 2012 at 6:01 pm

    One hopes that West Virginia’s unexpected win over Georgetown yesterday was enough to placate the Tunch-God. If the Steelers lose, I think I want to be in a parallel universe, stat. His wrath will be swift and terrible.

  119. 119.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 6:02 pm

    I bet Brady and Belichick are watching this and screaming “Fuck, yeah!” at the TV.

  120. 120.

    Omnes Omnibus

    January 8, 2012 at 6:02 pm

    Is Cole on suicide watch yet?

  121. 121.

    Bubba Dave

    January 8, 2012 at 6:03 pm

    I hate Ben as much as the next non-rapist does, but if I’d had to guess the quarterback who would be under 50% completion percentage with no scores and one pick, it would not have been him.

    Mostly, I’m rooting for Ben to spontaneously combust and then fall off a mountain, and Charlie Batch come in and win the game.

  122. 122.

    Raven

    January 8, 2012 at 6:03 pm

    This may be the final NFL Open Thread of the year.

  123. 123.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 6:03 pm

    Look, whoever it is who has stolen my reality and replaced it with Tebowverse, would you mind letting me have my own miserable life back?

    KTHXBAI

  124. 124.

    passerby

    January 8, 2012 at 6:03 pm

    6 – 17 Broncos.

    What!

    Is Denver’s D that good? and don’t the Stillers have any RBs that can churn something out?

    Ben’s been intercepted twice (ok one didn’t count but still.)

  125. 125.

    CaseyL

    January 8, 2012 at 6:04 pm

    Wait, did they call back that amazing reception on a delay of game penalty?

  126. 126.

    burnspbesq

    January 8, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    Finally getting to listen to Miguel Zenon’s latest record, Alma Adentro, while cleaning up the home office. This is the real stuff, ladies and gentlemen. I understand why it was on so many critics’ best-of-2011 lists.

  127. 127.

    passerby

    January 8, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    Steelers’ D looks like it’s just milling around on the field!

    What.

  128. 128.

    JPL

    January 8, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    I bet we don’t have an open thread for football again after this.

  129. 129.

    LT

    January 8, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    Oh if they get MacGahee going this game is toast.

  130. 130.

    Nerull

    January 8, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    Did the teams switch uniforms? Very funny, guys.

  131. 131.

    SST

    January 8, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    This is just delightful.

  132. 132.

    AnotherBruce

    January 8, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    Yes, time for Charlie Batch, Roethlisberger looks listless and confused. As does the Steeler’s defense.

  133. 133.

    J.W. Hamner

    January 8, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    It seems the Steelers’ Defense is as shocked as the rest of us when the Broncos’ Offense is effective.

  134. 134.

    Joe Bauers

    January 8, 2012 at 6:06 pm

    Apparently Tebow’s Jesus is stronger than Troy Polamalu’s Jesus.

  135. 135.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    January 8, 2012 at 6:06 pm

    @Raven:

    This may be the final NFL Open Thread of the year ever. Cole is probably deleting the archives of all the previous NFL Open Threads as I type.

    FIFY

  136. 136.

    4jkb4ia

    January 8, 2012 at 6:07 pm

    A song of ascents. From the depths I called You, Hashem. My Lord, hear my voice, may Your ears be attentive to the sound of my pleas. If you preserve iniquities, O God, my Lord, who could survive? For with You is forgiveness, that You may be feared. I put confidence in Hashem, my soul put confidence, and I hoped for His word. I yearn for my Lord, among those longing for the dawn, those longing for the dawn. Let Israel hope for Hashem, for with Hashem is kindness, and with Him is abundant redemption. And he will redeem Israel from all its iniquities.

    (The go-to psalm was 20, but “Now I know that Hashem has saved His anointed one” wasn’t going to do here…)

  137. 137.

    FridayNext

    January 8, 2012 at 6:07 pm

    No real dog in this hunt, but as both a Ravens fan and a Florida alum, I am giggling like a school girl.

  138. 138.

    FridayNext

    January 8, 2012 at 6:07 pm

    No real dog in this hunt, but as both a Ravens fan and a Florida alum, I am giggling like a school girl.

  139. 139.

    eyelessgame

    January 8, 2012 at 6:08 pm

    Red zone again?

    If Tebow is getting supernatural help, it ain’t from no Jesus.

  140. 140.

    JPL

    January 8, 2012 at 6:08 pm

    @Raven: I was a little late but I think you are right.

  141. 141.

    eastriver

    January 8, 2012 at 6:09 pm

    “And thus did Timmy RAWR.”

    Scorinthians, 17:6

  142. 142.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 6:09 pm

    Do we have any evidence that Cole isn’t lying behind the couch in a stupor, babbling in tongues and praying for an earthquake to hit the stadium?

  143. 143.

    eastriver

    January 8, 2012 at 6:09 pm

    “And thus did Timmy RAWR.”

    Scorinthians, 17:6

  144. 144.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    January 8, 2012 at 6:09 pm

    @FridayNext:

    FYI: You can’t pray the syphilis away. Just sayin’…

  145. 145.

    Bort

    January 8, 2012 at 6:10 pm

    Where’s your messiah now Tebow?

  146. 146.

    passerby

    January 8, 2012 at 6:10 pm

    @Bubba Dave:

    Charlie Batch come in and win the game.

    Man, the way BenR’s been hobbling/lumbering around with that ankle, going with Batch after the half might be the way to go.

    At 20-6 could it be any worse?

    ETA: [Worried about Cole.]

  147. 147.

    Persia

    January 8, 2012 at 6:10 pm

    @Tim F.: He almost certainly is. Though almost everyone in the NFL is at one time or another.

  148. 148.

    JPL

    January 8, 2012 at 6:12 pm

    so who is Pitt’s backup quarterback?

  149. 149.

    CaseyL

    January 8, 2012 at 6:12 pm

    Interesting hurry-up drive here. Be cool if they go into halftime after a dramatic last minute score.

  150. 150.

    2liberal

    January 8, 2012 at 6:12 pm

    steelers are Tebow’s bitches, as well as (usually) brady’s bitches

  151. 151.

    J.W. Hamner

    January 8, 2012 at 6:13 pm

    @passerby:

    Big Ben does not look good, but Chaz Batch is not that answer to any question in 2012.

  152. 152.

    CaseyL

    January 8, 2012 at 6:15 pm

    Or, y’know, not…

    ETA: OK, definitely no last minute score. I do believe The Lord hath spoken, and He hath said, Lose the Rapist or the kid wins it.

  153. 153.

    4jkb4ia

    January 8, 2012 at 6:16 pm

    Hashem, do not rebuke me in Your anger, nor chastise me in Your rage. Favor me, Hashem, for I am feeble; heal me, Hashem, for my bones shudder. My soul is utterly confounded; and You, Hashem, how long? Desist, Hashem, release my soul; save me as befits Your kindness. For there is no mention of You in death; in the Lower World who will thank You? I am wearied with my sigh, every night I drench my bed, with my tears I soak my couch. My eye is dimmed because of anger, aged by my tormentors. Depart from me, all evildoers, for Hashem has heard the sound of my weeping. Hashem has heard my plea, Hashem will accept my prayer. Let all my foes be shamed and instantly confounded, they will regret and be instantly shamed.

  154. 154.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    January 8, 2012 at 6:16 pm

    D’OH!

  155. 155.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 6:16 pm

    Interesting strategic approach by the Steelers there… chasing the pigskin back towards their own end zone.

  156. 156.

    Nerull

    January 8, 2012 at 6:17 pm

    What was the snapper aiming at?

  157. 157.

    PTirebiter

    January 8, 2012 at 6:18 pm

    I see bad things arising
    a crowd crowning king the commisioner would ban
    I see death and destruction
    Stillers elimination because of one man, because because because of one man

  158. 158.

    PTirebiter

    January 8, 2012 at 6:18 pm

    I see bad things arising
    a crowd crowning king the commisioner would ban
    I see death and destruction
    Stillers elimination because of one man, because because because of one man

  159. 159.

    Perfect Master

    January 8, 2012 at 6:19 pm

    @4jkb4ia: Enough already!

  160. 160.

    passerby

    January 8, 2012 at 6:20 pm

    @J.W. Hamner:

    But…but…Ben might as well be playing with a cane for as mobility impaired as he is.

    What are the odds they stay with BenR given inability to do anything?

    Batch sucks that bad?

    And, where the Sam Hill is the D?

    ETA: Maybe it’s the altitude.

  161. 161.

    burnspbesq

    January 8, 2012 at 6:20 pm

    @Nerull:

    I think that ball showed up on the air traffic control radar at DIA.

  162. 162.

    4jkb4ia

    January 8, 2012 at 6:20 pm

    @Perfect Master:

    It’s not even working, for crying out loud.

  163. 163.

    different-church-lady

    January 8, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    For the open of the second half Ben should just hand the ball to a Bronco in the end zone. Be much more efficient that way.

  164. 164.

    FridayNext

    January 8, 2012 at 6:23 pm

    @Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again):

    Since i neither live in Baltimore or consider myself a christian I am not sure why I should care. But if I am ever invited to your family reunion, I’ll be sure to pack the penicillin.

  165. 165.

    AnotherBruce

    January 8, 2012 at 6:24 pm

    Just remember the Mountaineers Cole. There there now.

  166. 166.

    Perfect Master

    January 8, 2012 at 6:24 pm

    @4jkb4ia: Thought you were goin for The Broncos. Sorry, carry on

  167. 167.

    tulip

    January 8, 2012 at 6:26 pm

    @burnspbesq:

    hahaha!

    And is there a worse announcer than Phil Simms? Tebowchrist… he blows.

  168. 168.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    January 8, 2012 at 6:27 pm

    “I’ll take Potent Potables for $500, Alex.”

    “This drink for depressed Steelers fans is made with equal parts Iron city Beer and Liquid Plumber.”

    “What is a Yinzer Suicide?”

  169. 169.

    Shawn in ShowMe

    January 8, 2012 at 6:28 pm

    @PTirebiter:

    Always hoped that we’d be Tebow’s Broncos
    Knew that we would make it if we tried
    Then when we retire fans can write the gospels
    So they’ll still talk about us when we’ve died

  170. 170.

    MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson

    January 8, 2012 at 6:32 pm

    @Shawn in ShowMe:

    Who is this broken Ben
    Cluttering up my playoff?
    Who is this unfortunate
    Someone Ben destined to lose?

  171. 171.

    Joel

    January 8, 2012 at 6:32 pm

    Could be worse. Could root for the Falcons.

  172. 172.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    January 8, 2012 at 6:32 pm

    @FridayNext:

    But if I am ever invited to your family reunion, I’ll be sure to pack the penicillin.

    Just bring a your rosary beads: The family is Roman Catholic and from Muskegon, so you can go to your confessor and be forgiven for the clinging scent of paper and steel mills.

  173. 173.

    CaseyL

    January 8, 2012 at 6:36 pm

    I have to say, that was a gorgeously thrown pass.

  174. 174.

    Raven

    January 8, 2012 at 6:40 pm

    @Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again): And catch Northern in the bay!

  175. 175.

    J.W. Hamner

    January 8, 2012 at 6:46 pm

    That looked like a lateral to me.

  176. 176.

    different-church-lady

    January 8, 2012 at 6:46 pm

    They should just get rid of the forward pass anyway.

  177. 177.

    Bondo

    January 8, 2012 at 6:50 pm

    Apparently even God can’t make the refs call the game right. Stop blowing the whistle early you bastards.

  178. 178.

    Omnes Omnibus

    January 8, 2012 at 6:52 pm

    @different-church-lady: I like rugby too.

  179. 179.

    J.W. Hamner

    January 8, 2012 at 6:55 pm

    Should be on the half inch line.

    Hate to say it, but I agree with Phil Simms… why so little shotgun from the Steelers? Seems like that would mitigate the mobility issues a bit.

  180. 180.

    Morbo

    January 8, 2012 at 7:56 pm

    I would love to hear Cole complain about the refs for this game.

  181. 181.

    Moonbatting Average

    January 8, 2012 at 8:12 pm

    God hath smote the Steelers!! Hallelujah!!!

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