Reader Brendan sends in news that he is playing tonight at the Carlyle Club in Alexandria, VA.
Reader DK sends in a video of himself performing 15 tv theme songs in 2 minutes.
What have all you principled centrists been up to this weekend?
by DougJ| 110 Comments
This post is in: Open Threads, Readership Capture
Reader Brendan sends in news that he is playing tonight at the Carlyle Club in Alexandria, VA.
Reader DK sends in a video of himself performing 15 tv theme songs in 2 minutes.
What have all you principled centrists been up to this weekend?
Comments are closed.
[…] VA. Reader DK sends in a video of himself performing 15 tv theme songs in 2 minutes. … <https://balloon-juice.com/2012/01/08/reader-newsnon-football-open-thread/> Balloon Juice […]
MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson
I’ve been polishing my Hayekian modesty in the hope of being noticed by the Holy Roman Economist of the Atlantic, Megan-Cersei of McArdle-Lannister.
Corner Stone
What has a liberal like yourself been up to?
Villago Delenda Est
@MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson:
She’s neither Holy, nor Roman, nor an Economist.
Nellcote
I’ve been repairing garden damage from a flock of wild turkeys that invaded this week.
Corner Stone
@Nellcote:
You got drunk and fell down in your garden?
JPL
What a great video. Thanks DK!
MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson
@Villago Delenda Est:
Damn, rumbled again!
PeakVT
Making my annual foray into Wikipedia to spruce articles. I should re-learn the futility of it in another few hours.
MildlyAmusedRainbowPerson
@efgoldman:
It’s not really soooo strange that Senator Man-On-Dog should be The Leader Of The Pack.
Lolis
I am working on a novel. It kind of sucks writing it, but I know I will be happy when it is done.
Yutsano
@PeakVT: Here there be dragons. Or complete idiots. The end effect tends to be the same for both.
Corner Store Operator
WOW DK that is freaking amazing.
Dee Loralei
Brendan, liked the band! DK that video was adorkable!
My crazy mad scientist father is cooking dinner tonight, so I’m supervising him to ensure he neither burns down the house nor cuts off fingers or other appendages. And otherwise being lazy.
I cooked a feast last night for my mom’s birthday, tenderloin medallions a la Oscar with a browned butter and tarragon mueniere. French bread, sauteed mushrooms and kale and raw Brussel’s sprouts salad and Clos Du Bois Merlot to drink. I didn’t make dessert because we’re having her “official Birthday dinner” next week with family and a friend or so.
Nellcote
@efgoldman:
“Trickless-Dick Mitt”
heh
WaterGirl
@Corner Store Operator: I must not watch enough TV. Can anyone name the 15 shows, in order?
RossInDetroit
I’m reading a book. REAMDE by Neal Stephenson. It’s huge, but is going by quickly. He seems to have found a good balance between action and exposition. I hope it’s worth it, as it’s going to cost me many hours.
ruemara
I am trying to tidy up the house and drag my uncooperative mate into doing both some share of the tidy and getting some damned resumes out for the blessed glut of recent local postings in both his and my field. I don’t want to compete against him since I have a some work and he has none. Plus I have this suspicion that a household with 2 jobseekers in it gives off some sort of red flag. I have to put it out there, am I being paranoid? Either way, If I don’t kill him today, it will be a good day.
jeffreyw
@RossInDetroit: Read that last month, I liked it a lot.
WaterGirl
@efgoldman: I thought this was a good one:
WaterGirl
@ruemara: Have you tried something like this:
jeffreyw
Moderated? ack
WaterGirl
@efgoldman: I think you might be right. Another gem from this morning:
Belafon (formerly anonevent)
Learning the Haskell programming language.
Thatgaljill
I took my son to his first fencing lesson yesterday, because if you’re going to be an elitist democrat short of riding in the hunt, what better olympic/collegiate sport are you going to introduce your 6 year old to?
Yutsano
@jeffreyw: HALP! HE’S BEING REPRESSED!!
Laundry and shopping day. And general cleaning. Next weekend I promised myself I would do a deep clean of the condo. Have to see if that comes to fruition.
ruemara
@efgoldman: This is my last year. I’ve done nearly 20 but the past 4 have been overwhelming.
jeffreyw
Mrs J has been sewing pet beds. They look pretty nice.
JGabriel
DougJ @ Top:
Right now I’m watching the GOP NH Debate I slept through this morning.
Just came across this gem from Ron Paul (~12:25 mark):
If only there hadn’t been that ocean between Russia and Afghanistan, there’d still be a Soviet Union.
Tell me again about Ron Paul’s foreign policy expertise.
.
PeakVT
@efgoldman: No, not really. Every once in a while I find a set of articles that bug me enough that I make a bunch of edits. Otherwise, I just fix little stuff whenever I find any.
@Belafon (formerly anonevent): Why?
jeffreyw
@Yutsano: Well, it was a pretty meandering comment, so no great loss.
B W Smith
Cleaning and rearranging furniture in anticipation of a post-holiday get together with my family. Fourteen folks in a thousand square feet, that should be fun! I am still contemplating a menu and wondering what I can cook to please the elderly, the young adults, the teenagers, and the babies. Well, I have a few days to think about it.
Lojasmo
Replaced the handset on our bedroom door yesterday after our 15 year old nearly walked in on Mrs. Lojasmo and I en flagrante delicto.
Raven
Red beans and rice.
MikeJ
@Belafon (formerly anonevent): Ooooh, fun! Syntax and all that crap is easy, the hard part is unscrewing your head and thinking in haskell. There’s a lot of other languages where you can keep the style of your favorite language and produce something that works (many people write in c even when they’re using perl, or in java when they’re using c). You can’t really do that with Haskell.
Rebooting your brain is fun/frustrating/needed every now and then.
cckids
@Thatgaljill: My son’s a fencer, he’s 19 now (started at 14), and he LOVES it still. If you are in the right club/studio, with a coach who loves the sport & isn’t just into pushing kids to compete, it is wonderful. What blade is he learning, or has he chosen yet?
WaterGirl
@ruemara: Does Mr R. know it’s his last year?
whiskey
I live a block from the Carlyle Club but am too lazy to leave the house so have fun!
geg6
Getting ready for the Stillers, doing laundry, and most impotantly and sadly, watching one of my dogs head into the final stage of life. He is still eating (but not as much or with his former gusto), but he’s lost control of his bladder completely and his back legs only work intermittently. We bought some doggie diapers, but the extra large size was about three sizes too small (any suggestions, dog people?). If he didn’t show so much of his usual spirit, we’d probably be making an appointment for a house call tomorrow. But he’s still our feisty Henry in spirit, if not in body.
This is my first pet. How do you know it’s time?
jeffreyw
@B W Smith: spaghetti
Schlemizel
@Nellcote:
Actually I was thinking more ‘trickless, dickless Matt’
I am ‘celebrating’ the start of my sixtieth trip around the G class gas bag. The fifty-ninth was worse than a complete waste of time.
R-Jud
@B W Smith:
Brownies. And for the babies: mashed brownies.
I’m writing off all of last week because I spent most of it in bed, in the fetal position, having febrile dreams about being forced to go back to high school and finding that Ann Coulter is moonlighting as my functions teacher. The only thing productive was my cough.
So, uh, Happy New Year!
JGabriel
Rick Perry (~13:50):
And who better to draw that stark contrast between the smart and the brainless than Rick Perry?
A Rick Perry candidacy would be wonderful. The only ad the Democrats would need to run would be the 1964 Daisy ad, with the minor edition of Rick Perry saying “Oops” at the 33 second mark.
.
Belafon (formerly anonevent)
@PeakVT: It started out as a recommendation for improving template metaprogramming in C++, but I actually do like a number of features in the language.
Raven
@geg6: Aw damn. I had a Henry, big shepherd collie. I think the eating is the best gauge but it’s still going to come down to you. Do your best, make your decision and try not to hammer yourself when you do. It’s the second best thing you’ll ever do for him and you’ve already done the first.
B W Smith
@jeffreyw: Spaghetti sounds great but my daughter-in-law eats no pasta. She doesn’t like it and passed along that distaste to the babies. I was thinking homemade pizza but that’s a lot of dough to mess with for 14 people with hearty appetites. I think I’ll take a trip to your site for some ideas though.
@R-Jud: Yum! I love brownies! Sounds like a great dessert since I fail at cakes and pies.
R-Jud
@B W Smith: This recipe is pretty brilliant. I made two batches for New Year’s Eve (house party, 12 adults, 13 kids) and they vanished about three minutes after I opened the tin. The only change I made was to skip the white chocolate chunks.
schrodinger's cat
@B W Smith: Tacos? You can make a number of different filings, fish, ground beef, steak, beans, chicken, shrimp etc. Have a number of different salsas, guacamole, heat up a stack of corn tortillas and everyone can assemble their own tacos. A pitcher of margarita for drinks. Flan for dessert.
Belafon (formerly anonevent)
@MikeJ: That’s why I’m sticking with it. I like it when I get challenged to think differently.
As for the language, I think pattern matching eliminates a lot of the issues that Design Patterns like visitor try to work around, and I like some of the strong typing. Lazy evaluation and partial function application really do change the way you think about how to put programs together. Some of the parts of the language and library reinforce some of the things I had been doing in C++, namely separation of walking a structure from performing operations on the structure. But I’m still early in the learning/using stage. We’ll see how my thinking changes when I solve some problems at work — I tend to learn something and then find a use for it.
Cat Lady
I was just given the book Extremely Loud and Incrediby Close and told it was really good and to read it – I’d really really like it – but now the movie is almost out and I’m tempted to just see the movie because it’s a movie I’d see anyway whether I read the book or not. Is the book really going to be that much better than the movie?
SIA
Watching this morning’s debate after show rerun. I had no idea former governor Sununu was such a flaming asshole.
JPL
@geg6: It’s been my experience that they tell you. The appetite is one way but the other is they are just tired and want to be allowed to let go.
kdaug
Hrm.
As I’m neither centrist nor principled, I’m doing the January yard work leavened with whiskey and Skyrim.
Worse things in life than typing with gasoline-scented fingers.
Amir Khalid
I hadn’t noticed this before, from the amazingly stupid Rick Perry. Iraq’s bottom line is, they don’t want foreign troops on their soil who don’t answer to Iraqi law. There’s simply no room for the US to negotiate around that. How does Perry manage not to understand this?
SIA
@geg6: Aww, I’m really sorry and know just how you feel. We had a very good vet once who said, “When it’s time, you’ll know it and your pet will know it.”. Our last loss, our beautiful Maggie, was agonizing. She was pretty sick and had similar problems with her bowels and walking. We gave it a couple days while she was still eating a bit (we fed her raw liver) and would drink. Then she stopped eating but would still drink water. When she stopped drinking water And wouldn’t go outside, even with help, we called the vet in. It was time. And now I have to go have a good cry because 3 years later I still miss her so much. Take care of yourself.
Brachiator
@PeakVT:
Very cool, even if futile in the long run.
I was listening to one of the hosts on a local sports talk radio program, a gadget and technology freak, mention as an aside how he had made his annual donation to support Wikipedia. Part of his end of the year to do list.
ruemara
@WaterGirl: He does, in the sense that he knows he’s not acting right. But he thinks I will change my mind if he is even more helpless. Makes me wanna knock myself out with a 2×4 until 2013.
That being said, I think I will do your suggested action. I’ve been passing the better stuff up to him and, frankly, not applying to anything because I never know what he will send out for or when. Broke is not a lifestyle I can sustain anymore.
@geg6: Aww, geg. My best to you and your boy. Sometimes, it is too blessed hard to figure out. You have to make that quality of life/tired and want to be let go choice. I’m truly sorry.
JGabriel
@Cat Lady:
AV Club gave the movie version of Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close an F.
Statistically, it seems unlikely that book version could be worse.
.
Violet
@B W Smith:
Can you do something like go get a ham so the main course is taken care of? Then just do sides. Not sure if you eat meat/pork, but I did ham at Christmas and it makes it so much simpler to do the rest of the meal.
I second the taco suggestion, but it does depend on how old the kids are. A bunch of toddlers aren’t a great target audience for make-your-own tacos.
B W Smith
@R-Jud: Those look delish! I hate to sound stupid but is there some way to convert the recipe to American measurements?
@schrodinger’s cat: Tacos! What a great idea and a perfect excuse to use paper instead of china. Thanks!
The last time I hosted the get-together I did hearty winter soups. It turned out to be a hit. I made White Bean Chicken Chili, Chicken Tortilla, and Winter Vegetable and an array of homemade bread. I suppose I could have done the same, but I like to mix it up.
stevestory
Just wanted to thank Cleek for adding, to the pie filter, the function of removing those really annoying ‘share’ pop-up windows that invariably block whatever i’m trying to click on or read. What a stupid idea those were.
wrb
@geg6:
Harriet, who was a very neat girl and never developed bowel problems, stopped eating a few days before and quietly dies in my arms, her breathing slowing to a stop. I’m glad I let her pick her time.
Betsy, who was fouling herself, and seemed upset, crawled off and died alone in a cold rain. Perhaps should have intervened.
SiubhanDuinne
@geg6: Oh damn, I’m so sorry. He will let you know when it’s time, and you will do the most loving thing you can do by honouring his message. But it’s hard, and it sure hurts. {{hugs}}
@Schlemizel: Congratulations and happy birthday! Let me tell you from immediate experience, this next decade will go by in a flash.
SiubhanDuinne
@geg6: Oh damn, I’m so sorry. He will let you know when it’s time, and you will do the most loving thing you can do by honouring his message. But it’s hard, and it sure hurts. {{hugs}}
@Schlemizel: Congratulations and happy birthday! Let me tell you from immediate experience, this next decade will go by in a flash.
Churchlady
@Nellcote: Wow – at least you’ve had an INTERESTING experience! Not just anyone can write those words. All I get is the neighbor’s cat using my garden for a sandbox. I think I’m envious…
B W Smith
@Violet: Thanks for the suggestion. I love ham but my brother’s family does not eat it. It’s not a religious thing, they just don’t eat pork. The toddlers are four and two. I’m sure Mom and Dad can make the tacos for them. They both love to eat Mexican out. Tacos offer them all an opportunity to make their food to their liking.
Churchlady
@WaterGirl: Sacraments of marriage are church based, and no church is being asked to perform weddings for same sex couples – however those that so choose are being prohibited. So much for freedom of religion.
Marriage is and always has been a civil action with licenses from the county and ratification from the state honored by the federal government. Its purposes are many, but securing God’s blessings is not one of them. Inheritance, property, tax rates – nothing sacred about any of it. So Newt predictably confuses issues. I am not surprised since he refuses to understand his own Biblical teachings where divorce was the mortal sin. Oh, well. The bloviator strikes again.
stevestory
The only way the pie filter could be better is if it auto-deleted all the ‘…wait for it…’s from the posts of stupid people who fancy themselves clever.
Violet
@B W Smith:
Tacos sound great and fun for everyone. For another time, since ham isn’t an option, you might consider ordering a Greenberg Smoked Turkey. They are delicious and you don’t have to cook them.
Raven
Just torched a huge pot of red beans and rice. great
Raven
@B W Smith: I use big Amberjack filets. Brine em, smoke em on a water smoker and serve them on 2 corn torts with shredded cabbage tossed with homemade mayo spiced with Tabasco chipotle.
R-Jud
@B W Smith: Here’s the converter I usually use: http://homecooking.about.com/library/weekly/blcalculator.htm
I’ve lived over here for almost seven years and still think in “sticks” of butter.
Yutsano
@Raven: I’d say start over but I have a feeling you’re one of those overnight soaker folks.
B W Smith
@geg6: I am so sorry for both you and your beloved pup. As one who has been through this several times, I can tell you that each pet is different. If he appears to be in pain, it may be time. It is a hard decision but one he is depending on you to make. The last time I had to make that decision was actually very peaceful and serene. Both my kitty and I knew it was time. It wasn’t easy and I shed many tears but I knew it was best for him. I wish you peace.
Raven
@Yutsano: Pressure cooker. I thought I’d salvaged them by not stirring and getting them out of the pot but not this time. Shift to chicken, black beans and rice. My worst experience was years ago when my sister got married. I had my old man go rent me a big pot for jambalaya and I was so jacked to be cooking for many in my family that had never had my cooking. I am used to using a big, heavy bottomed pot and I just didn’t pay attention. I had the stock boiling and when I hit it with the rice it burned to the bottom instantaneously. This was in my folks house and there was no mistaking what had happened as the smell spread quickly. I had enough stuff to make one grocery run and put together a pretty decent chicken creole for the crowd but I was seriously bummed.
Steeplejack
@ruemara:
I hesitate to put this out there, but I have been thinking it for a while, so here goes: is it possible that your partner is depressed? I don’t mean temporarily down, I mean suffering from clinical depression. From your previous posts (and my own experience personally and with family members in the past) I get a very strong vibe about that.
I guess my point being that, if that is the case, or could be, then it might be useful to work on that directly rather than on all the things that are being blocked by it.
I am not a shrink, and I’m sorry if this is over the line. But, like I said, I am getting a strong vibe about it. Which of course could be wrong.
Raven
@ruemara: “household with 2 jobseekers in it gives off some sort of red flag” To who? It’s no one’s business but yours.
B W Smith
@R-Jud: Thanks for the converter. I think I’m gonna try the brownies. I have now bookmarked the recipe and the converter.
@Raven: Sorry about the red beans. The amberjack sounds fantastic. It may be a little above my skill level. I think I’ll try it when I’m not under pressure to perform (in light of your other story).
@Violet: That turkey looks wonderful. Another page bookmarked!
WereBear (itouch)
When you ask yourself, Am I putting this off just because I don’t want to lose him?
If the answer is Yes, then, sadly, it’s time.
Batocchio
Great job by DK. Clever arrangement, and very crisp recording.
ruemara
@Steeplejack: Oh, I’m sure he’s depressed. Everyone but him is sure he’s depressed. His track record screams both situational and biochemical depression. Now. If there’s any way to get a grownassed, stubborn man to a shrink for depression, who insists he is not depressed and that his tai chi practice keeps him on an even keel, that is the $25k question. You aren’t over the line at all. As I’ve told all the personal friends who’ve asked me why I am allowing this situation, I am no longer anyone with any influence over him. If all those concerned friends would show up and actually talk to him, instead of me, then maybe he might be less inclined to blow me off.
@Raven: At this point, I’m beyond any rational reason why I and the mate haven’t gotten an interview in a few years or nearly a year, respectively-so I’m looking for any and all criteria including something that could be read as fiscal household in disarray. It seems petty, but it’s a petty world in some offices.
schrodinger's cat
@B W Smith: You are welcome! For one of your salsas, you could make mango salsa or pineapple salsa. Just replace mango for tomatoes in the pico de gallo recipe. Fresh mangoes are the best but frozen will do in a pinch.
Raven
@ruemara: Have you read Styron’s Darkness Visible: A Memoir of Madness? My ex went through an intense clinical depression and this book nailed it.
ruemara
@Raven: It looks interesting. I may leave it laying around if the local libraries have it. Wish it came in graphic novel format, that would really bait the hook.
WereBear (itouch)
Maybe ask them to do so? Even the nicest people can be paralyzed by indecision in such situations. Telling people what you want and need can be a great kindness.
Southern Beale
I was gonna work on my short story because i have a shit-ton of regular writing to do next week, and this was the only open hole, but by the time we got back from CostCo and I cleaned all the veggies and put up all the chops in the freezer and then walked the dog it was 4:30 and I was too tired.
So, actually, nothing.
currants
@Raven: Recipe, by chance? I’ve been looking for a good one. Have an old, really good recipe for chicken gumbo, but that’s as far into the woods as I dare venture.
PurpleGirl
@geg6: So sad to hear about your pet. You’ve already done the first thing — realized that he is that sick and you’re looking at the decision. It isn’t easy to recognize and decide that it’s time. You’ll just have to play it by ear and see if you can tell when too many bodily functions are failing at once and he’s in pain.
A friend was out of town for work and I was pet sitting when Hugo (a 15 to 16 year old Doberman pinscher) began to go down hill. Hugo was experiencing an irregular heartbeat, he had another bladder infection and another tumor on a hind leg, and he had Doberman nerve syndrome (pinched nerve). He was still eating but nothing was coming out. I had to tell my friend that I thought it was time. (I’d never had pets as a child and Hugo had made me one of his humans — ghod how I loved that dog…)
KS in MA
Writing my annual employee self-evaluation for my job. All the questions are cringeworthy and nobody will read my responses anyway … but, eek, what if they do?
WaterGirl
@geg6: My heart goes out to you. When I saw your comment, I went searching for the balloon juice thread from last summer when you first started thinking that the time would be coming all too soon. Found it!
Since you catch different people on different threads, I thought I would share the link with you in case you didn’t bookmark it at the time.
https://balloon-juice.com/2011/05/18/open-thread-1021/
My thoughts are with you and Henry and your John.
WaterGirl
@KS in MA: I will share some advice regarding self-evaluations that I got from a friend of mine.
She said that if you think you’re doing a good job, say so, and that there are plenty of people out there who will be critical and tear you down, you don’t have to help them do it. :-)
currants
@WaterGirl: *grin* Excellent advice. I’ll try to remember it in my next interview, when I catch myself explaining why other people can do everything better than I can (and I notice my interviewers looking from me to my resume, with puzzled looks on their faces).
WaterGirl
@ruemara:
That all sounds really rough. No wonder you feel like you are at the end of your rope.
In my experience some people can really hear hard things, and truly take them in, in certain ways. Maybe a hand-written letter from you, that he could read again and again if he needed to might help him really get it?
I also agree with WereBear about asking your friends to communicate with him directly.
I had a really great employee, and awesome person, working for me for years. He fell into depression months after his fiancé broke off their engagement and he went from the best employee ever to me wanting to strangle him on a regular basis. He knew his work wasn’t up to par and we would talk about what he needed to do, and he would plan to turn it around, but the depression just kept him from doing it. For months and months and months, maybe a year.
One day he didn’t show up at work, so I asked one of the other employees to go check on him. He was in trouble, thinking about doing things that would not be good. So we got him to come into work and one of us (in our small office) was with him all day, and I contacted his brother, whom I had met a few times. His brother dropped everything, got in the car, drove up from 6 hours away.
He talked to his brother, which paved that way to talking with his parents, which paved the way for him talking to his pastor, and getting help.
Now he’s back to being the great employee and awesome person. Maybe one of your friends can help get through in a way that you haven’t been able to.
Violet
@ruemara:
Not sure you’re still reading this thread, but if you are, take a look at Hyperbole and a Half‘s take on depression. It’s in comic strip form and she’s hilarious and dead on. Maybe that would be more in keeping with the graphic novel format you wanted.
Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason
@Violet: We made Tacos-in-a-Bag in Cub Scouts.
Buy 2 dozen single-serving bags of fritos
Cook up your taco filling
Open each bag and dump in:
taco filling
lettuce
tomato
shredded cheese
salsa
Mash everything up in the bag, and dig in with a spoon.
For recipes, google “taco in a bag”
Violet
@Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason: Sounds like a frito pie — the kind you get at a little league baseball game or middle school football game.
WaterGirl
@currants: I will thank Tina for you!
A trick I learned a long time ago when I was applying for jobs: If you’re not comfortable singing your own praises, you can always say something like ‘I’ve been told that I am good at …” Or I’m told that I seem to have a knack for…
Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason
@SiubhanDuinne: Great. I just hit six-oh and I can’t remember what happened to the last two decades. I was hoping the next one might be a little slower.
Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason
@Raven: This Damnyankee has tried several recipes for red beans and for jambalaya, and they’ve all sucked. I’m thinking a trip to New Orleans and cooking classes may be the only solution.
I can do a wicked paella though. Everything on the grill, start to finish.
alicia-logic
@ruemara:
Sorry to jump in, since I’m just a lurker you don’t know, but if there’s a friend he trusts this can make the difference. My SO had a bout with mania when his anti-depressant prescription was changed last year and he couldn’t / wouldn’t see it until a friend who also suffers from depression told him what he was seeing and how worried he was. Since his story matched mine, it was hard to ignore.
andy
Saw these frozen packs of duck breasts that were like four bucks at the market so I had to try them, even I have never worked with or eaten quackers. I think I did a really good job!
andy
Also, Tony Blankley is dead. I think wingnuts love having their crap transmitted by someone with a British accent. Makes ’em feel like their movement has some weight to it, I guess. I guess all that’s left now is Sullivan…
Ronzoni Rigatoni
@Batocchio: Daniel Koren (DK) and co. are professionals. No surprise there
KS in MA
@WaterGirl: Thanks! I got it done, and threw in a few brags too. You’re a peach!
WaterGirl
@KS in MA: Yay!
KS in MA
@geg6: My heart is with you and Henry. Just give him all the love you can; it’s all that really matters. But you knew that.
ruemara
Thanks, Werebear, Violet & Alicialogic. I’ve been resisting trying to engage people he knows because, well, it feels very odd to involve them. They, like him, aren’t really good at making relationships outside of a tiny circle, and I’ve been outside that circle. I love the Hyperbole & Half strip. I think for him the issue is that he is not living in the dark, not bathing and completely disengaged with everything for long whiles. He bathes, and he’s obsessed with things for long stretches. So for 8 months, he’d eat breakfast and read every single online comic he could find from say 10 am to 2pm. And that is doing something. But he’s talented and I can’t stand seeing him devolve like this. We’ll see what happens, but thank you all for your ideas and your support.
Steeplejack
@ruemara:
Had to go out and just got back a little while ago.
I think it could be good to have one of your partner’s friends talk to him (assuming one who is on the same page as you–i.e., that your partner is depressed–and with some communication skills). Sometimes the message is better received coming from a friend rather than a spouse. The latter can be perceived as attacking or ball-busting. Yes, that’s illogical and itself a product of the depression, but there it is anyway.
Reading on-line comics for four hours a day does not sound like “doing something.” It sounds like a high-addiction, low-frustration activity designed to keep the depression (and underlying fear and anxiety) at bay. Sort of like emotional morphine. Palliative care. What I mean is that, although it doesn’t sound like the “typical” depression you described earlier in the paragraph, it sounds to me like a different flavor of depression. He’s basically immobile, but in a different, “doing something as camouflage” way.
Since you said he does tai chi, he might be receptive to The Mindful Way Through Depression. It comes with a CD of guided meditations.
Paul in KY
@Thatgaljill: Fencing is tougher than it looks. Getting the shit slapped out of your wrist by a long, skinny, whip-like piece of metal also hurts.
I expect your son will soon find out. Best of luck.
brendancalling
@whiskey:
little late to this thread (hard to post when you’re driving in I-85), but thanks to Doug for posting a promo.
Kids, if you haven’t been to the Carlyle, get your butts over there sometime. It was REALLY nice. I felt like I’d walked into the Cotton Club sometime in the early 1930s, so i felt kinda naked since I didn’t have my top hat and tails.