Tit for tat
As the War on Women marches inexorably onward, Democrats are starting to fight back — cheekily.
In Virginia, state Senator Janet Howell attached a “rectal probe” amendment to the Virginia State-Sanctioned Rape bill. The amendment would have required men to have a rectal exam and a cardiac stress test before obtaining a prescription for erectile dysfunction medication. (It failed to pass.)
In Oklahoma, Constance Johnson attached an “every sperm is sacred” amendment to the GOP’s Personhood bill. The amendment would have construed any action in which a man ejaculates or otherwise deposits semen anywhere but in a woman’s vagina as an action against an unborn child. (Democrats voted to table the amendment in order to demonstrate that it was introduced in jest.)
And now Georgia Democrats are stepping up.
In Georgia, Republicans seek to pass HB 954, a bill that will tighten “life of the mother” exceptions to abortion by prohibiting abortions on women who are more than 20 weeks pregnant. (Current law prohibits abortions after the second trimester, or about 24 weeks.)
In response, Georgia Democrats led by Yasmin Neal (D-Awesometown) have proposed a bill that would ban Georgia males from seeking vasectomies:
House Democrats have scheduled a 3 p.m. Wednesday hearing at the state Capitol, to propose a bill that would ban Georgia males from seeking vasectomies. From the press release:
“Thousands of children are deprived of birth in this state every year because of the lack of state regulation over vasectomies,” said Rep. Yasmin Neal, author of the bill. “It is patently unfair that men can avoid unwanted fatherhood by presuming that their judgment over such matters is more valid than the judgment of the General Assembly, while women’s ability to decide is constantly up for debate throughout the United States.”
House Minority Leader Stacey Abrams added, “The Republican attack on women’s reproductive rights is unconscionable. What is more deplorable is the hypocrisy of HB 954’s author. If we follow his logic, we believe it is the obligation of this General Assembly to assert an equally invasive state interest in the reproductive habits of men and substitute the will of the government over the will of adult men.”
Perfect.
[cross-posted at ABLC]
DanielX
Two thumbs WAY up….I can almost hear the good ole boys gobbling in outrage.
The Republic of Stupidity
Indeed…
And how long until even masturbation is deemed an illegal, nay, even a criminal act?
Let us not forget…
If masturbation is outlawed… only outlaws will…
Soonergrunt
The amendment in Oklahoma would have made masturbation ending in extra-vaginal ejaculation into a crime.
Rick
Careful what you ask for, sarcastically or not. ‘Cos Tricky Rick will be all down with outlawing vasectomies….
THE
I thought this was a funny satire ABL:
All female panel discusses men’s health.
Belafon (formerly anonevent)
Can you imagine what High School would be like if that masturbation amendment had passed?
Bruce S
How about laws against spilling seed where it can’t become part of God’s plan for making babies?
If Callista is still giving Newt BJ’s, which is unlikely given the desperation signaled by his Tiffany’s bill, Virginia’s State Legislature needs to put a stop to their spermicide.
gwangung
ABL 2.0….these latest post have been doing nothing to rile up the uptight white people on the blog….
Or maybe they’re collapsing in sheer apoplexy from having to agree with you…
Rick
@The Republic etc. Actually, the *Y*oung *M*en’s *C*hristian *A*ssociation was invented to provide young men with an alternative energy outlet to masturbation. Turns out physical fitness promotes testosterone production, and ergo, horniness. Evolution has a strong sense of irony.
PurpleGirl
@Soonergrunt: Actually, this idea is very, very Catholic. It takes its meaning from the story of Onan who was supposed to have sex with his brother’s widow (the brother having died without issue) in order to give the widow a son. God smote Onan because he had the sex but spilled his seed upon the ground, therefore depriving his brother’s widow of a son who could/would provide for her.
This should be right up Santorum’s alley, as it were. It has the feeling of the Old Testament and it’s Iron Age.
What’s not to like?
mattH
Oklahoma Democrats are wimps, QED. If you are gonna troll please don’t hold back; gives the rest of us bad names.
West of the Cascades
Rep. Neal is my hero. I’d love to see someone tack on an amendment to her bill to the effect that any man in Georgia committing adultery three times or more is REQUIRED to have a vasectomy. Call it the “Neuter Newt” amendment …
Bruce S
“The uptight white people”
Those were her biggest cheerleaders before Obama came to his senses – the trash-mouths like General Stuck who couldn’t countenance any criticism of an administration that had assholes like Tim Geithner and Larry Summers running economic policy.
SIA
And that’s the first time in forever that I haven’t been embarrassed by a Georgia politician. I LOVE this woman.
Violet
This is excellent. I think an enterprising representative should also propose a bill requiring men to submit to a cystoscopy (bladder inspection via catheter) before, oh, let’s see, how about getting a driver’s license. Why do that, you ask, it’s completely unrelated and unnecessary. Why, yes it is! Exactly.
Ira-NY
We have jumped the snark.
Mnemosyne
@Bruce S:
You know, when the government starts rooting around in my uterus, there’s no one I care less about than Tim fucking Geithner, much less Larry fucking Summers, who hasn’t even been employed by the Obama administration since 2010.
But, please, tell all of us simple-minded ladies again that we’re focusing on frivolous girl stuff and not the manly financial stuff you think we should be focusing on.
SIA
Woot!
Soonergrunt
@PurpleGirl: Oh, I know. I think they could’ve made a real point about it.
@mattH: Hell, I wish they had kept it on the table. But you gotta remember, there’s three parties in OK–The dems, who have no power at all, the Republicans who are in charge, and the Teabaggers, who keep coming up with things like these laws that keep getting found unconstitutional.
Hell, the speaker of the house, Chris Steele, a fairly conservative Republican, has seemingly come to the conclusion that his caucus is batshit insane. He’s tabling bills and moving bills from one committee to another to kill them all the time because he knows they’d pass if they ever got on the floor and the state would be fucked.
Soonergrunt
@Soonergrunt: Well, more fucked than it is now.
Odie Hugh Manatee
What’s good for the goose is good for the gander. The biblical argument is there too so that makes it even better. I think regular prostrate exams (like every three months) should be a requirement for those boehner pills they love to use to inflate their ‘ego’.
Digital exams for everyone! :)
suzanne
I support calling on companies to stop paying for boner pills, myself.
The Flying Spaghetti Monster weeps when any noodle is stiffer than al dente.
pete
@West of the Cascades: Vasectomy? I think we can go further than that …
The prophet Nostradumbass
@Mnemosyne: That should leave a mark.
dead existentialist
@Soonergrunt: Do Okies do this as a matter of routine? And if they do, why?
gwangung
@Bruce S: Snicker, snicker.
MariedeGournay
I laughed.
ABL 2.0
@gwangung: waltzed right into that one.
@Mnemosyne: yyyup.
dead existentialist
@dead existentialist: Ooops. I get it. I was confused by your use of “extra-vaginal.” To me that implied two people, one with and one without. Seemed kinda kinky in that context, not that there’s anything wrong with that.
Other than that, I’d be breakin the law all the time if that bill passed (and I was unfortunate enough to live in OK).
pseudonymous in nc
Dear commenters, I know this is preaching to the choir, but preach it to your own choirs: give a shit about state legislative elections. Every weekday we can quote some idiotic thing that some idiot state rep. says, or worse, some idiotic bill proposed by one idiot and backed by other idiots. But most people don’t really know or care about the statehouses, even when they get to make these fucking laws.
Marcellus Shale, Public Dick
i only hope, for the sake of the national discourse, there is a next level of demogoging this issue.
tearful post-menopausal grandmas tired of being rubbed raw by preternatural erections testifying to the harm boner pills have caused their sensitive and thinning ladyflowers testifying before female committees on boner pills.
girls scouts carrying signs that say
buy cookies!
stop vulvovaginal atrophy!
debbie
Someone needs to ask the Catholic Church to go on the record and give their opinion of these proposals.
gocart mozart
@The Republic of Stupidity:
STOP THE TUBESOCK HOLOCAUST!
TR
Fantastic. Hope these women keep it up.
That Other Mike
@gocart mozart:
We need to get Cole to add that to the rotating slogans at the top of the page.
Jeff Boatright
@debbie: Actually, that’s a great idea. Vasectomies should be against Catholic doctrine. That’s a no-brainer. But what about procedures that are done for the health of the male patient that might result in sterility/impotence? Shouldn’t they also be dissallowed?
runt
This one could backfire. I can easily imagine that Republicans will embrace it. More babies, you know. They can never get enough babies.
Soonergrunt
Prostatectomy frequently results in impotence and occasionally sterility.
Bruce S
Mnenosyme – that was a response to an idiotic comment that preceded, intended to derail the issue at hand and as moronic bait re stale bullshit. The last thing these ABL threads need is a revival of the crap that used to go on here – wherein any criticism of the Obama admnistration’s policies was met with shouts of “Firebagger.” I’ve been a big Obama supporter since Day One and can prove it to any idiot who claims otherwise. But the last thing we need is lame cheerleaders yelling insults at critics, rather than engaging substance. That was the tenor of a lot of the bullshit that filled these threads.
So go fuck yourself.
lethargytartare
@Bruce S:
lets just say my analysis of those past threads doesn’t match yours, and that your recollection of kneejerk Obama supporters yelling “Firebagger” as being the problem in those threads convinces me that you’re a self-centered, insensitive, pompous jackass who should maybe keep his mouth shut about issues that matter to other people.
just a thought.
Rafer Janders
Give it up for Yasmin Neal. And by “give it up”, I mean that literally: let’s donate some campaign contributions so she can keep up the good work.
Bruce S
lethargytartare – I doubt you’ve done any “analsysis” of those crap threads. Nor does your comment qualify as “a thought.” But thanks for the kneejerk bullshit response.
.
daveNYC
I appreciate what is trying to be done with this bill, but targeting vasectomies isn’t exactly going to wig a lot of people out.
Going after the boner drugs would be a better idea.
EnoughIsEnough
Yes. Yes. Yes. It’s time ladies. We’ve got to stand up for ourselves and if we can bring our husbands and significant others along, all the better.
lethargytartare
@Bruce S:
here are your responses to everyone with whom you disagreed in this thread:
gwangung: idiot
General Stuck (didn’t even post in the thread): trashmouth
Mnemosyne: go fuck yourself
yeah, I’m the one spewing kneejerk bullshit.
eat it, d-bag.
Bruce S
Stuck is a trashmouth – having spewed epithets rather than argument in context of substantive criticism over the “deficit mania” that infested even the administration before Obama came back around to reality.
Mnemosyne can go fuck him/herself with that witless crap that missed the point, and the fact that I was not the one derailing the thread with completely off-topic, deliberately “baiting” horseshit.
You’re still spewing kneejerk bullshit.
My mistake was to respond to a moron…
Actually, responding to three.
My fucking bad.
ABL
the lack of self-awareness is truly astonishing.
kMc
I live in the Commonwealth of Virginia. It’s the best place ever, as long as you have the right genitalia and your skin is of the right hue.
Thomas McDonald
I appreciate what is trying to be done with this bill, but targeting vasectomies isn’t related to abortion issues. It would be equal to a woman getting her tubes tied. Pre-conception vs post-conception…