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You are here: Home / Past Elections / Election 2012 / Early Morning Open Thread: Sooooper Tuesday

Early Morning Open Thread: Sooooper Tuesday

by Anne Laurie|  March 6, 20125:20 am| 35 Comments

This post is in: Election 2012, Open Threads, Assholes

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(Walt Handelsman via GoComics.com)

Here in Massachusetts, nobody’s even bothered to advertise on the Old People Network News, for variety among the Boniva/Cialis/Embrel/Advair/AARP come-ons. If Romney isn’t granted our Commonwealth’s chance to lose to President Obama come November, the shock may prove fatal even to some of the local Democratic operatives. A little something from Doghouse Riley to put everybody in the mood for the day:

THE 2012 Republican Presidential primaries will be remembered, if at all, for having taught us any number of things we already knew.
__
Rush Limbaugh is a human cloud of flatulence. Rick Santorum is a 10th century religious lunatic. Newt Gingrich is to serious politics what Newt Gingrich is to academic history. Nobody likes Mitt Romney.
__
Of course the preeminent truth is that the whole goddam party is insane, and that the Press, having ignored the over-abundance of evidence of this for a generation, now finds itself incapable of dealing with this…
__
For those of you just tuning in, or exiting a coma, yes, this is the very same Republican party which threw out African-Americans–literally, not just figuratively–by dissolving all the Reconstruction-era Republican organizations across the south in 1964, and which has been milkin’ that same bull ever since. It’s the same one which is currently involved in a national effort to obstruct voting by poor people. It’s the one where the “moderates”–see McCain, “Desperate John”–are the ones who’ve flip-flopped on the issue. Now a fast-growing Hispanic minority is an opportunity you’re not taking full advantage of? Maybe you people should come out in favor of contraception. In selected drinking water supplies.

The question many Republican strategists are asking themselves at the moment is whether — in 2012, 2016 or even 2020 — it’s worth taking one step back in order to, hopefully, take two steps forward.

GOP 2020: That Shit-Stain Was There When We Got Here.
__
Two steps forward to what? You’ve had thirty years at least to do something about this. Your brand, clearly, consists of pushing hot buttons for votes, not offering a vision of leadership. You’re not one lesson, or two, away from righting the ship. You’re forty years off course.

***********
So, what’s on the agenda here in the Reality-Based Community?

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Previous Post: « South Carolina: You Can’t Be a Republican if You’ve Had Premarital Sex
Next Post: Not Wealthy »

Reader Interactions

35Comments

  1. 1.

    pluege

    March 6, 2012 at 5:44 am

    when you represent all the vile indecency that the human character can manufacture, where do you go with that?

    republican – the party of everything human beings should not be or become.

  2. 2.

    MikeJ

    March 6, 2012 at 5:55 am

    Obama press conference this afternoon.

  3. 3.

    SuperHrefna

    March 6, 2012 at 6:07 am

    Meh Romney, I like that! I woke up way too early this morning, but I just got the new Patricia Briggs novel delivered to my Kindle so I’m going to curl up and read that for a while longer. And I’m going to dream about planting another tray of seeds: I just fell in love with the seeds at the Hudson Valley Seed Library. Their Art Packs are utterly irresistible, so far I’ve got the Cosmonaut Volkov tomato, the New Yorker tomato and the Good Bug Blooms and I’m thinking about adding the Painted Daisy & Evergreen Scallion.

    And then eventually I will have to get up & face the day, but not yet!

  4. 4.

    Clark Stooksbury

    March 6, 2012 at 6:38 am

    According to “Dr. Helen” Smith(the Instawife), mean girls are picking on Rush:

    There are many conservatives who unfortunately allow the left to take their morality and use it to stifle their dissent. Limbaugh should have gone on the attack. He should have said “no apology” and exposed her for the partisan hack that she is. Do I care if Fluke fucks 50 guys? No, but I do care if she uses her position to gang up with other mean girls (and guys) to ram a political mandate down the throats of companies who do not believe in what she is peddling.

    Standing up to mean girls is hard. I am in the process of writing a book on men’s attitudes towards marriage and society and it is damn hard to get individual men to be interviewed. If I ask questions on the internet or in an anonymous setting, I am flooded with comments from men. I recently had over 3200 men answer a poll about paternity fraud, but try to get just a few men to talk in person? That’s tough. And most are very concerned that their name will not be published. I don’t blame them. The mean girls are out in society in full force.

    If Rush Limbaugh can’t stand up to the mean girls, who can?

    I think this is what losing looks like.

  5. 5.

    Marcellus Shale, Public Dick

    March 6, 2012 at 7:04 am

    and in not at all shocking, sudden speech impediment news, bill o’reilly cannot pronounce “fluke”, he can only say “fluck”. i am sure this is either totally accidental,coincidental, or product of some sort of tragic cognitive injury.

  6. 6.

    WereBear (itouch)

    March 6, 2012 at 7:12 am

    At least there won’t be any sanctimonious bleatings about what a good husband and father Rush is. Because I fear Rush will have a health crisis when that writing on the wall get dry.

  7. 7.

    dmsilev

    March 6, 2012 at 7:19 am

    @WereBear (itouch): I disagree. Rush is obviously an excellent husband; look at how much practice he’s had getting married.

  8. 8.

    Davis X. Machina

    March 6, 2012 at 7:21 am

    @MikeJ: He’s going to finally announce that property is theft, and call on all of us to expropriate the expropriators.

    But you’ll be able to tell he doesn’t mean it.

  9. 9.

    Southern Beale

    March 6, 2012 at 7:22 am

    Online poll at my local CBS affiliate, Who Will Get Your Vote In The Super Tuesday Primary?

    President Obama winning with 28% of the vote. LOL.

    I know, the Republican vote is split 4 ways. Just sayin’.

  10. 10.

    Mino

    March 6, 2012 at 7:30 am

    Just got a security block at Think Progress. Anybody else?

  11. 11.

    kdaug

    March 6, 2012 at 7:32 am

    @pluege:

    republican – the party of everything human beings should not be or become.

    Republicans – the party of things you teach you kids not to do.

  12. 12.

    mick

    March 6, 2012 at 7:36 am

    doghouse riley is banned in china! he will be proud to know that the great firewall bans his site.

    just realized this tonight where i sit in beijing.

  13. 13.

    Linda Featheringill

    March 6, 2012 at 7:39 am

    @Mino:

    No, I’m okay with think progress.

    I think I’m blocked from redstate. The fact that I made fun of their defense of Rush Limbaugh wouldn’t be significant, would it?

  14. 14.

    Schlemizel

    March 6, 2012 at 7:43 am

    NPR accidentally revealed the outcome of the day in an aside during their piece on Stupor Tuesday. Inserted in the middle of a sentence was “Rick Sanctimonious did not field slates a delegates in many precincts in Ohio”.

    Thats the key isn’t it? Even if ol frothy wins Ohio he does not win all the delegates he could & Meh continues his inexorable slog to bitter defeat in November. Willard is the only one who ever had the organization to pull this off, it was his to take. He could have pulled it off, a really humiliating defeat, but the total incompetence of the entire GOP team saved him from his own.

  15. 15.

    Linda Featheringill

    March 6, 2012 at 7:46 am

    @Clark Stooksbury:

    Loved it!

    Yes, we can.

  16. 16.

    jeffreyw

    March 6, 2012 at 7:49 am

    I do hope we don’t have to stay up very late for the results. The tension and anxiety really take a toll on my cat Toby.

  17. 17.

    Amir Khalid

    March 6, 2012 at 7:53 am

    I went to a music store today and asked for the new Springsteen album.

    Twentyish store assistant: “Is Springsteen a band?”

    I feel old.

  18. 18.

    kay

    March 6, 2012 at 8:02 am

    We had a reporter from the China Times at the Bd of Elections this morning. He’s the US political reporter, so out of DC, and they sent him out to cover the OH primary. My husband brought him back to the house (because he brings everyone he meets back to the house) and he interviewed us.

    I think he was disappointed we aren’t Republicans. He kept asking me about Santorum. My husband took him off to find some Republicans to interview, which shouldn’t be difficult, here.

  19. 19.

    Some Loser

    March 6, 2012 at 8:06 am

    @Clark Stooksbury:
    What am I looking at?

    How can you possible classify Sandra Fluke as a “mean girl”? The women only ever addressed Limbaugh to tell him his apology was shit.

  20. 20.

    kay

    March 6, 2012 at 8:22 am

    @Schlemizel:

    “Rick Sanctimonious did not field slates a delegates in many precincts in Ohio”.

    More and more I think his candidacy is another conservative grift. Has he had a job since he was a senator? I’m getting suspicious.

    How many fake-candidate grifters can the GOP base support?

  21. 21.

    jibeaux

    March 6, 2012 at 8:25 am

    @Amir Khalid: This is wrong.

    @Clark Stooksbury: Not to psychoanalyze too terribly much, but I’m going to call referring to someone who has never mentioned Rush Limbaugh’s name in public or publicly responded to any of the godawful things he’s said as being a “mean girl” to Rush either projection or the cult of victimhood taken to the infinite limit of peak wingnut.

  22. 22.

    FlyingToaster

    March 6, 2012 at 8:33 am

    @kay: SATSQ: Rick Santorum works on K-Street. His net worth has grown exponentially* since leaving being tossed from the Senate.

    *Exponentially may be hyperbole; but he wasn’t a multi-millionaire as a Senator, and despite his claims, he is one now.

  23. 23.

    FlyingToaster

    March 6, 2012 at 8:37 am

    And there seems to be a 2- or 3- way race for Democratic Committeeman — yes, an archaic position for residents of the Commonwealth, a pair of folks to represent each Senate District, one Committeeman and one Committeewoman.

    We got robocalled by one, and postcarded by another. The third possible is in Cambridge, so I can’t tell whether he’s in our district and forgot us, or is in the next district over. Senate Districts that cross county lines are a pain when you’re trying to figure out boundaries.

    And our local papers and websites are useless. Bleah.

  24. 24.

    kay

    March 6, 2012 at 8:56 am

    @FlyingToaster:

    *Exponentially may be hyperbole; but he wasn’t a multi-millionaire as a Senator, and despite his claims, he is one now.

    I heard him lying about that yesterday.

    I figure he’ll run a Palin grift, where he “represents” some slice of the GOP base, but is not actually elected or accountable. No one will ever call him on it, because he’ll become a professional guest, and the political media need professional guests, or the whole thing comes to a grinding halt. They need each other, the grifters and the pundits.

  25. 25.

    The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge

    March 6, 2012 at 8:57 am

    Well, there’s this: According to some yahoo on Yahoo, Ohio matters in November but not on Super Tuesday. I think somebody’s internals aren’t looking so good, and they’re trying to pre-soften the blow.

  26. 26.

    danielx

    March 6, 2012 at 9:05 am

    Reality based, right. This isn’t reality – it’s pure fantasy when I get to watch the Republican party melt down because of a human-shaped pile of feces named Rush Limbaugh.

  27. 27.

    redshirt

    March 6, 2012 at 9:11 am

    @pluege: Yes. This is the core of the issue. I’m not a person who believes in existential GOOD and EVIL, but we can use those terms subjectively to describe human behaviors that run counter to the welfare of the entire species.

    As such, Republicans stand for everything base and evil in the human spirit. Greed, fear, hate, power, violence, etc. Republican leaders know this, and they use these visceral feelings to play their followers.

    This is why people vote against their own interests – because they’ve succumbed to their lesser instincts. Helped along by the Propaganda networks the Republicans use so well.

    So the struggle is getting people to rise above these base desires. Tough road to hoe in many cases.

  28. 28.

    a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)

    March 6, 2012 at 9:13 am

    @jeffreyw: Poor thing.

  29. 29.

    Schlemizel

    March 6, 2012 at 9:32 am

    @BO_Bill:
    My guess is you are quite familiar with prostitutes – given the personality you have displayed here.

    You might also want to weight the factor of a B list blogger vs. the defacto head of (and named honorary Congressman by) the GOP and how that influences reactions.

  30. 30.

    Kristine

    March 6, 2012 at 10:38 am

    @Amir Khalid: You went to a music store?

    I’m 53, and it hit me that it’s beens years since I bought a CD. For good or ill, it’s all downloads now. My CDs are stacked in the basement.

    And on the other end of the spectrum, I have friends who still swear by vinyl.

  31. 31.

    Nemesis

    March 6, 2012 at 11:10 am

    Heres what we are seeing with the current crazed iteration of the gop. Its history repeating itself.

    Back in the ’70’s, the Dems has a similar problem. The country was moving a wee bit to the right and the progs were caught flatfooted. The liberal ways were demonsized and the Dems paid a price. One might say we are still feeling the affects of the Dem realignment of those days.

    Anyhoo, the gop faces much of the same today. They too will fight internally and, if they wish to win national elections, will be foreced back toward the center. It may take years, decades even, but it will happen.

  32. 32.

    brettvk

    March 6, 2012 at 12:31 pm

    @jeffreyw: Dear God. What was in that mouse?

  33. 33.

    Jamie

    March 6, 2012 at 12:43 pm

    unfortunately as a Dem, we keep losing the decennial elections so we continue to play at a disadvantage.

  34. 34.

    Mnemosyne

    March 6, 2012 at 2:07 pm

    @Nemesis:

    demonsized

    I know this is a typo, and yet I love it madly.

Comments are closed.

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  1. The Mahablog » Meanwhile, the Republicans Are Still Looking for a Candidate says:
    March 6, 2012 at 8:50 am

    […] Annie Laurie, Doghouse Riley: THE 2012 Republican Presidential primaries will be remembered, if at all, for […]

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