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You are here: Home / Elections / Election 2012 / For Your Listening Pleasure

For Your Listening Pleasure

by John Cole|  March 6, 20129:00 pm| 175 Comments

This post is in: Election 2012, Clown Shoes

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Eat this, Will-I-Am:

Kill me now.

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Previous Post: « Help My Sister Out, If You Can
Next Post: Rick Sanctorum Death Watch »

Reader Interactions

175Comments

  1. 1.

    Gex

    March 6, 2012 at 9:02 pm

    Ugh. Shiny plastic people. Did he steal these guys from Romney’s camp?

  2. 2.

    middlewest

    March 6, 2012 at 9:02 pm

    TPM has Romney and Santorum tied in OH right now.

  3. 3.

    Mike in NC

    March 6, 2012 at 9:02 pm

    ABC calls it for Frothy in OK and TN. Go Ohio!

  4. 4.

    dmsilev

    March 6, 2012 at 9:03 pm

    It doesn’t hold a candle to “It’s Raining McCain”.

  5. 5.

    dmsilev

    March 6, 2012 at 9:05 pm

    @middlewest: Google’s AP feed just updated to show Frothy in the lead with 11.5% reporting. Gonna be a long night.

  6. 6.

    Schlemizel

    March 6, 2012 at 9:07 pm

    Just accidentally saw the slimy amphibian speaking in Georgia. He claimed that during his presser today Obama was only worried about gas prices because it hurt his reelection chances. The guy is a genius in his own way – he turned an absolutely brilliant take down of FAUX News into something bad. His sheep sure were eating it up

  7. 7.

    Southern Beale

    March 6, 2012 at 9:08 pm

    Santorum wins Tennessee and Oklahoma WHY CAN’T MITT ROMNEY SEAL THE DEAL?!

    Because he’s a robot who makes people uncomfortable?

    OH OKAY THANKS

  8. 8.

    jrg

    March 6, 2012 at 9:08 pm

    The harmony sounded good, but the time spent putting this together might have been better spent reading some Vonnegut, or maybe on a mission trip to Saudi Arabia.

  9. 9.

    Baud

    March 6, 2012 at 9:09 pm

    I have to admit, between this and the Apple take-off ad, Santorum got the most artistically interesting ad campaign of the 4 GOP candidates. Who’d have thunk it.

  10. 10.

    Gex

    March 6, 2012 at 9:10 pm

    It’s funny. The GOP wants us to believe any one of these guys is better than Obama, yet the insist on demonstrating that they don’t actually like any of them.

  11. 11.

    dmsilev

    March 6, 2012 at 9:10 pm

    So where is our pet troll to tell us that Romney will seal the deal, take it to the bank guaranteed? It doesn’t seem like a primary night without cries of *VICTORY!*.

  12. 12.

    Persia

    March 6, 2012 at 9:10 pm

    Those girls are really, really white. Right down to the bullshit hipster feathered jewelry.

  13. 13.

    BruceFromOhio

    March 6, 2012 at 9:10 pm

    There must be some hidden encoding in that vid, I suddenly feel like drinking tequila and blasting the Clash at full volume.

    Better lip-synching, please.

  14. 14.

    geg6

    March 6, 2012 at 9:12 pm

    Nuh uh. Nope. No way, Cole. Not.gonna.click.

  15. 15.

    middlewest

    March 6, 2012 at 9:13 pm

    @dmsilev: The silence is deafening.

  16. 16.

    JPL

    March 6, 2012 at 9:13 pm

    @Schlemizel: If you only read Drudge headlines, what else are you to believe…
    Of course politifact will rate it half true.

  17. 17.

    Wilson Heath

    March 6, 2012 at 9:14 pm

    Am I overly suspicious or was the length of Gingrich’s speech designed to give us alcohol poisoning?

  18. 18.

    Baud

    March 6, 2012 at 9:14 pm

    @dmsilev: He gave us “VICTORY” but he’s also ruined so many good threads, I hope he’s found a new troll home.

  19. 19.

    trollhattan

    March 6, 2012 at 9:15 pm

    Rankin’ Ronny Reagan trapped in a roundabout, that is a piece of dreck, if that’s not too insulting to dreck.

    Oh there is hope for our nation a-gan
    Maybe the first time since we had Ronald Ray-gan.

    ‘Ats as far as I got. Knuckles now sore from punching the computer.

  20. 20.

    greennotGreen

    March 6, 2012 at 9:16 pm

    That vid broke my mouse, so I had to listen to it till I could get the cursor unstuck.

    And God gave us the Bill of Rights? Is that in the New Testament or the Old?

  21. 21.

    lamh35

    March 6, 2012 at 9:17 pm

    Ok, not a fan of David Frum, but his twitter feed is hilarious, very snarky. Wonder if he’s been drinking?

  22. 22.

    Suffern ACE

    March 6, 2012 at 9:18 pm

    @middlewest: I think someone forgot to unbar him for the evening. His first amendment rights were violated when he said something obnoxious about FLOTUS and we all got compared to the secret police protecting Madame Ceausescu for having none of that. I think he’s only allowed out on primary nights.

  23. 23.

    dmsilev

    March 6, 2012 at 9:18 pm

    Frothy’s lead is up to about 2.5%, with about 16% reporting. In other news, the Romney campaign announced that the candidate would be upgraded from Gingerbread to IceCreamSandwich next week.

  24. 24.

    Emma

    March 6, 2012 at 9:18 pm

    I will watch that ONLY after drinking enough vodka to puke it out of my mind.

  25. 25.

    eemom

    March 6, 2012 at 9:18 pm

    As for Gnoot, this little Georgia “victory” tonight might well be the very last of his entire fetid career. His swan song, as it were.

  26. 26.

    lamh35

    March 6, 2012 at 9:19 pm

    BTW, How smart was the Obama admin to do that press conference today? So now in every speech so far, the MSM plays POTUS answers to each issue brought up by candidates as comparison to the speech.

  27. 27.

    Left Coast Tom

    March 6, 2012 at 9:20 pm

    I couldn’t make it through that entire thing…do they have aspirin between their knees?

  28. 28.

    KG

    March 6, 2012 at 9:20 pm

    @lamh35: Does anyone cover politics sober?

    I don’t know how they’d be able to do that

  29. 29.

    Logan

    March 6, 2012 at 9:21 pm

    Wow. It’s the Partridge Family without the plad and not enough drugs. I don’t think anyone has used that much hairspray since the 80’s.

  30. 30.

    S. cerevisiae

    March 6, 2012 at 9:22 pm

    Not going to click either, the initial image is enough to keep me in the boat.

    Sing a song of Santorum?

  31. 31.

    David Koch

    March 6, 2012 at 9:22 pm

    Will I Am is an Obot

    http://newsone.com/files/2012/02/obama_william.jpg

  32. 32.

    Left Coast Tom

    March 6, 2012 at 9:23 pm

    And why is my browser’s Reload button blinking on and off whenever this tab is active, doesn’t happen with any other tab and its pretty annoying having to time my clicks to the reload button’s spasms. FF 10/Mac OSX 10.6, if that helps.

  33. 33.

    lamh35

    March 6, 2012 at 9:24 pm

    Wow does it freak anyone else out how much Santorum’s daughter looks like Rick himself?

    It’s kinda freaky right.

  34. 34.

    Gex

    March 6, 2012 at 9:24 pm

    @lamh35: I like how they complained about the timing. If this were hockey, they would demand the other team pull their goalie for the entire game or it’s unfair and impolite.

  35. 35.

    Soonergrunt

    March 6, 2012 at 9:24 pm

    @geg6: It’s too late for me but you can still save yourself!

  36. 36.

    Left Coast Tom

    March 6, 2012 at 9:24 pm

    …and immediately after clicking Submit on the ‘blinking reload’ complaint, reload is no longer blinking. Its been consistently blinking for days. Maybe I should complain more often.

  37. 37.

    trollhattan

    March 6, 2012 at 9:26 pm

    @Logan:

    “Sants for Slutorum.”

  38. 38.

    hamletta

    March 6, 2012 at 9:26 pm

    @Logan: Dude, the Partridge Family didn’t wear plaid; you’re thinking of the Bay City Rollers.

  39. 39.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    March 6, 2012 at 9:26 pm

    I listened to it three times. If the santorum jokes are in there, they’re too subtle for me.

  40. 40.

    Baud

    March 6, 2012 at 9:27 pm

    Santorum: The government wants to control you — I just want to control half of you.

  41. 41.

    trollhattan

    March 6, 2012 at 9:28 pm

    Ricky’s speechifying somewhere, “Ladies and gentlemen, this is the beginning of the end of America.”

    Fersure dude.

    He just counted up all the little Santorums. Awww, lots.

    In Ohio, I guess.

  42. 42.

    Johannes

    March 6, 2012 at 9:29 pm

    Right now, La Caterina is dancing around my kitchen singings and dancing to this fetid piece of doggerel in a display of mockery unparalleled since Tina Fey doing Palin demonstrating the Pageant Walk.

    Oh, God, I love my wife

  43. 43.

    trollhattan

    March 6, 2012 at 9:30 pm

    Pierce is twitter-twatting Rih’s speech.

    We are a great country because people have the freedom to not have sex?

  44. 44.

    WaterGirl

    March 6, 2012 at 9:30 pm

    @dmsilev: Thank you, dms! Someone else had victory displayed in all caps, but not bold, and it just wasn’t right. :-)

  45. 45.

    Egg Berry

    March 6, 2012 at 9:30 pm

    @Gex:

    If this were hockey, they would demand the other team pull their goalie for the entire game or it’s unfair and impolite.

    If this were hockey, Obama would have some enforcers skating at his side to knock the shit out of them when they tried to hit him.

  46. 46.

    muddy

    March 6, 2012 at 9:31 pm

    @lamh35:

    Ok, not a fan of David Frum, but his twitter feed is hilarious, very snarky. Wonder if he’s been drinking?

    He has actually seemed a bit better since he had his face/nerve thingy, possibly he grew some empathy for people having situations they can’t help and getting mocked for it.

  47. 47.

    demimondian

    March 6, 2012 at 9:32 pm

    I looked at the signs, and thought they read “Sanitorium”. Rick Sanatorium…yeah…I like it.

  48. 48.

    Irving

    March 6, 2012 at 9:32 pm

    This is hilarious. It’s beginning to look like Santorum’s going to take Ohio. Romney’s going to look like a disaster tomorrow if it happens. Anyone seen Veritas lately? Last I heard he was headed to The Blue Oyster for a stiff drink.

  49. 49.

    Anoniminous

    March 6, 2012 at 9:32 pm

    A heart warming song from the heartland sung by heartlanders celebrating God’s Chosen candidate who will lead the US back from the oppressive control of the IslamoCommieTerroristfromKenya. God bless those young people, these simple people of the land. The common clay of America.

    You know… morons.

    (and a hat-tip to Mel Brooks.)

  50. 50.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 6, 2012 at 9:33 pm

    jeebus teebow and beeber does Bananas Foster pay Rikki by the word for these speeches?

  51. 51.

    lamh35

    March 6, 2012 at 9:33 pm

    wait, wait, Santorum’s own kid is yawning during this speech. He’s young though, but still.

    Seriously guy, David Frum is really snarky tonight.

    Oh and Romney may have won VA tonight, but Ron Paul seems to be getting 40% of the vote totals…WTF!!!!

  52. 52.

    dmsilev

    March 6, 2012 at 9:34 pm

    @WaterGirl: One has to respect the classics.

    Frothy’s lead is up to 3.5 percentage points. Maybe the Romenytronic decided to cut back on the Internet Troll budget.

  53. 53.

    Spaghetti Lee

    March 6, 2012 at 9:35 pm

    DEFEAT!

  54. 54.

    Jager

    March 6, 2012 at 9:35 pm

    I’m sure those singers were checked and certified by Santorum’s Virginity Police.

  55. 55.

    Spaghetti Lee

    March 6, 2012 at 9:36 pm

    @lamh35:

    Santorum and Gingrich were too incompetent to actually get their names on the ballot a few months back, so it was a two-man race.

  56. 56.

    lamh35

    March 6, 2012 at 9:36 pm

    @Irving:
    Has all of Romney’s counties come in yet?

    I think it’s hilarious that over 150,000 people came out to the Ohio primary and voted for PBO (I believer there was some state-wide/local elections, but still)…wow!

  57. 57.

    Soonergrunt

    March 6, 2012 at 9:37 pm

    This post really does need the “I hate all of you” tag. Because that’s the only thing that explains him posting it.

  58. 58.

    gbear

    March 6, 2012 at 9:37 pm

    Is Romney going to make a habit of holding his victory parties in states that he though were sure-wins but turned out to be losses? He looked stupid enough at his Colorado party, now Ohio turns on him. Haha.

  59. 59.

    MobiusKlein

    March 6, 2012 at 9:37 pm

    they couldn’t even find one token?

  60. 60.

    General Stuck (Bravo Nope Zero)

    March 6, 2012 at 9:38 pm

    Sheat, is Sanitarium leading in OH. The devil is a grinnin’/

  61. 61.

    Martin

    March 6, 2012 at 9:38 pm

    @lamh35:

    Seriously guy, David Frum is really snarky tonight.

    Not easy watching your worldview die before your eyes. Go easy on him.

    After watching Noot and Frothy give their victory speeches, I’m definitely stupider for it. I hope Rmoney already gave his, because if I accidentally sit though that I might forget how to drive to work tomorrow.

  62. 62.

    Bondirotta

    March 6, 2012 at 9:38 pm

    My heart is full. I feel joy and peace and a deep sense of contentment.

    Mitt is so screwed – the Village is going to tear him apart. He may lose Ohio and he lost Georgia by 25 fucking points.

    Obama is beating him in Virginia polls and is 30 points ahead in the slut demo.

    Bliss.

  63. 63.

    Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)

    March 6, 2012 at 9:38 pm

    Mitt has to hope that his precincts are the ones not counted yet, because Rih’s lead is out to almost 4% with 29% of precincts reporting.

    Or maybe the Ohio GOP plans to follow in the footprints of earlier states and lose some of the Santorum vote.

  64. 64.

    geg6

    March 6, 2012 at 9:39 pm

    @trollhattan:

    I think he’s in Steubenville, which would be almost like home turf. Steubenville is in the Pittsburgh media market, so they would be familiar with him from his time as a rep and then senator here.

  65. 65.

    Anoniminous

    March 6, 2012 at 9:40 pm

    @lamh35:

    Looks like Romney is winning “his” territory but not by much and getting slaughtered everywhere else.

  66. 66.

    Soonergrunt

    March 6, 2012 at 9:40 pm

    OHIO: With 29% reporting – Santorum 39.2%, Romney 35.4% Frothy is actually expanding his lead.

  67. 67.

    Bondirotta

    March 6, 2012 at 9:41 pm

    LOL – Drudge cannot bear to say that Santa leads – he is calling the 3.6% lead “deadlock” right now.

  68. 68.

    West of the Cascades

    March 6, 2012 at 9:41 pm

    Wow – Nate Silver projected 72.7% for the Romneybot in Virginia and he ends up getting 59%. Paul seems to have taken 11 counties so likely he’ll get some delegates.

    This could be a long night for Mitt and Ann, and not in the way Santorum would object to. Thank God they’re poor in spirit.

    Add in the President looking like the only adult in the room on Iran earlier today, and it could be a pretty Super Tuesday indeed.

  69. 69.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 6, 2012 at 9:41 pm

    @geg6: and IIANM he fucked up his campaign and he’s ineligible for any delegates from the (congressional?) district. Has anyone heard: Is it possible for Santorum to win the popular vote and get screwed on delegates because of his ineptitude? That should set the fur flying.

  70. 70.

    Baud

    March 6, 2012 at 9:41 pm

    I need to go to bed, but I want to see them call OH for Rih!

  71. 71.

    Anoniminous

    March 6, 2012 at 9:41 pm

    Frothy has jumped to an early lead in North Dakota over Mittens 40% to 26% with 13% reporting.

  72. 72.

    dmsilev

    March 6, 2012 at 9:42 pm

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN): One of the dKos front-pagers pointed out that the Ohio cities have only just barely begun to report, and Mitt might do better there than in less dense regions of the state. If that doesn’t prove to be the case, Romney’s fucked.

  73. 73.

    Bondirotta

    March 6, 2012 at 9:42 pm

    Mitt is speaking! He does not have the heart to wait for Ohio results.

    He has to give a semi-concession speech since he is behind in OH.

  74. 74.

    beltane

    March 6, 2012 at 9:42 pm

    I think our friend Veritas/RC is over at DKos right now assuring everyone that Romney is going to seriously crush Santorum in Ohio once the votes from the cities are counted. As Santorum gradually pulls ahead, the troll grows ever more desperate.

  75. 75.

    lamh35

    March 6, 2012 at 9:43 pm

    Wow at least the speeches will be finished early. Wow Nate Silver says now Santorum is a slight favorite in OH. He’s maybe about 60-70% likely to win…

  76. 76.

    Baud

    March 6, 2012 at 9:44 pm

    Romney doesn’t have enough states he calls “home” to win the nomination.

  77. 77.

    PurpleGirl

    March 6, 2012 at 9:44 pm

    @Left Coast Tom: Are you kidding? The way they jump around, they must be sluts…

  78. 78.

    Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)

    March 6, 2012 at 9:44 pm

    Romney closes the gap a bit. 38.9% to 35.7% for Rih with a third of the precincts counted. It’s nice to see, but a 3.2% lead with this much of the vote still out is almost meaningless.

  79. 79.

    muddy

    March 6, 2012 at 9:45 pm

    @Soonergrunt: Sic.

  80. 80.

    David Koch

    March 6, 2012 at 9:45 pm

    Ann Romney is a dirty, dirty minx. She so needs to be spanked.

  81. 81.

    geg6

    March 6, 2012 at 9:45 pm

    This is fucking hilarious. Rih spent how much in Ohio media?

    Everybody hates Mittens and his money.

  82. 82.

    trollhattan

    March 6, 2012 at 9:45 pm

    @geg6:

    Thanks, I was watching him on radio. :-)

    Nate Silver:

    Pretty sure Santorum is a slight favorite in Ohio. He’s maybe ~60%-70% likely to win.

    Not enough popcorn in all of Iowa for this season.

  83. 83.

    dmsilev

    March 6, 2012 at 9:46 pm

    @Baud: That’s easily solved. He’s got enough money to buy one home in each state, and then presto he’s the home-state candidate *everywhere*.

    Can’t lose.

  84. 84.

    lamh35

    March 6, 2012 at 9:46 pm

    exit polls from Tennessee, 75% of voters said Religion matters to them and of those who voted Santorum won them 3 to 1. Romney’s religion problem again???

  85. 85.

    Calming Influence

    March 6, 2012 at 9:46 pm

    First you ask us to help support your sister’s MS ride, which we do gladly; and then you inflict this on us? Cruel, John. Very cruel.

  86. 86.

    trollhattan

    March 6, 2012 at 9:46 pm

    Aaaaand here’s Willard!

    Has anybody noticed he’s as bad at naming kidz as Sarah(tm) and Tawd?

  87. 87.

    demimondian

    March 6, 2012 at 9:47 pm

    @dmsilev: Win! I wonder what kind of ARM he has in his head?

  88. 88.

    Bondirotta

    March 6, 2012 at 9:47 pm

    Mitt is pissed. This puppy is furious…. Look at how he clenches his teeth while smiling.

  89. 89.

    trollhattan

    March 6, 2012 at 9:48 pm

    Willard:

    “I’m gonna get this nomination.”

    Crowd:

    “Is that why these checks are post-dated?”

  90. 90.

    Johannes

    March 6, 2012 at 9:48 pm

    “There will be justice for the unborn,” sure, but what about the undead? Who stands for them?

  91. 91.

    James B Franks

    March 6, 2012 at 9:48 pm

    @greennotGreen: heh that’s the line that sticks with me too.

  92. 92.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 6, 2012 at 9:49 pm

    @Bondirotta: I think one of the under discussed aspects of Romney is his anger. He despises the Republican base and they’re making him grovel. He’s Nixon with better hair and money.

  93. 93.

    jgaugust

    March 6, 2012 at 9:50 pm

    Mittens’ speech pattern is really odd. He has this strange habit of licking his lips and making a strange popping sound at the beginning of each sentence. It’s actually pretty annoying and makes listening to him a bit difficult.

  94. 94.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 6, 2012 at 9:50 pm

    @Johannes:

    “There will be justice for the unborn,” sure, but what about the undead? Who stands for them?

    Dick Cheney.

  95. 95.

    muddy

    March 6, 2012 at 9:50 pm

    I just always feel sorry for Romney. I don’t know why, it’s not really warranted. I just cringe for him somehow.

  96. 96.

    Bondirotta

    March 6, 2012 at 9:50 pm

    Look at his left temple…. Six hairs are sticking out… This bot is slowly unraveling…

  97. 97.

    Baud

    March 6, 2012 at 9:50 pm

    Is it just me, or does Romney look and sound really sad right now?

  98. 98.

    lamh35

    March 6, 2012 at 9:50 pm

    @The Fix ‏

    Romney to his opponents: “Nice races”. People don’t talk like that.

  99. 99.

    trollhattan

    March 6, 2012 at 9:51 pm

    Whoa, Willard just promised federal health care.

    To veterans.

  100. 100.

    Carnacki

    March 6, 2012 at 9:52 pm

    Game on? Game on? Motorhead

  101. 101.

    gbear

    March 6, 2012 at 9:52 pm

    My favorite comment of the night is this description of Santorum at Wonkette:

    Can you imagine being this angry at health insurance, at an inanimate object that is just trying to help?
    Can you imagine?
    That your life’s work is taking out a restraining order on the government, which is not even stalking you?

  102. 102.

    Martin

    March 6, 2012 at 9:53 pm

    @geg6:

    Steubenville is in the Pittsburgh media market, so they would be familiar with him from his time as a rep and then senator here.

    And yet he couldn’t get enough signatures from voters to win any delegates there.

    By contrast:

    Sasha Issenberg, a journalist who has done extensive reporting on campaigns’ new uses of data and analytics, said the Obama campaign is leading the way. It takes a rigorous approach to testing the effectiveness of different messages, tracking results based not only on the message content but also the name given as the sender of the email, the subject line, the format, even the date and time of day the messages are sent.

    Seriously, don’t underestimate just how competent the Obama campaign is, particularly in contrast to this lot. Messaging, debates, shit like that matters, but even more is the ability to organize volunteers, reach voters, GOTV, and campaign and spend money where it matters. If you want to know the one thing that appeals to me about Obama more than any other – it’s that.

  103. 103.

    Bondirotta

    March 6, 2012 at 9:53 pm

    46% in and the Santorum lead is rock solid 16’000.

    It has not shrunk for the past ten points.

    Mitt is beginning to remind me of Randall Flagg. Behind the smile there is this satanic melange of rage and gleeful arrogance.

  104. 104.

    lamh35

    March 6, 2012 at 9:53 pm

    why does Romney’s eyes always looked red-rimmed like he had a big cry right before he came out?

  105. 105.

    trollhattan

    March 6, 2012 at 9:54 pm

    I think they’re chanting, “Weenie Mitt, Weenie Mitt, Weenie Mitt!”

  106. 106.

    Gex

    March 6, 2012 at 9:54 pm

    @Egg Berry: Ahhh. I love the image. That’s actually fair play still, so you know the GOP would cry about how uncivil it is and how very unfair.

  107. 107.

    dmsilev

    March 6, 2012 at 9:54 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    I think one of the under discussed aspects of Romney is his anger. He despises the Republican base and they’re making him grovel.

    Well, to be fair, the Republican base is easy to despise.

  108. 108.

    freelancer

    March 6, 2012 at 9:54 pm

    The lyrics, they are boggling!

    For the first time since Reagan we’ll have protection for the unborn?!

    God gave us the Bill of Rights! Yeah, a man you might know as James Madison had this to say about Religion:

    Experience witnesseth that ecclesiastical establishments, instead of maintaining the purity and efficacy of religion, have had a contrary operation. During almost fifteen centuries has the legal establishment of Christianity been on trial. What has been its fruits? More or less, in all places, pride and indolence in the clergy; ignorance and servility in the laity; in both, superstition, bigotry and persecution.

    Who does not see that the same authority which can establish Christianity, in exclusion of all other religions, may establish with the same ease any particular sect of Christians, in exclusion of all other sects?

    That diabolical, hell-conceived principle of persecution rages among some; and to their eternal infamy, the clergy can furnish their quota of impas for such business…”

    Woah there, Mr. Author of the Bill O’ Rights! Them’s fightin’ words!

  109. 109.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 6, 2012 at 9:54 pm

    @muddy: I could feel sorry for him, but he’s a nasty fuck underneath that Wink Martindale mask. Titling his book “No Apologies”, calling Obama “feckless” after supporting the Bush foreign policy for a decade and hiring all those neocons. Good thing the Iraq War was so long ago, and nobody remembers how it happened, or else people in the Village might notice Romney’s a dangerous fuck.

  110. 110.

    Bondirotta

    March 6, 2012 at 9:55 pm

    I swear he is blinking back tears with that rictus of a smile plastered on… Paging Douglas Sirk….

  111. 111.

    JPL

    March 6, 2012 at 9:56 pm

    Wouldn’t it be nice if one repub had folks standing behind them that actually looked like the nation at large. How many old white folks are there.

  112. 112.

    Jeffraham Prestonian

    March 6, 2012 at 9:56 pm

    I am so proud of my first ever ratf*ck vote. Brown Eye Gravy Boy took Tennessee! Yay, me!

    Unfortunately, he has no pledged delegates, here, and in a brainfart moment, I voted for all of The Ging’s delegates and the balance, Rick Perry’s. I should have voted for all of Ron Paul’s, and the balance, The Ging. Dang. I’m new at this.
    .

  113. 113.

    Old Dan and Little Ann

    March 6, 2012 at 9:57 pm

    @jgaugust: My wife and I call that mayonnaise mouth. It’s a horrible affliction.

  114. 114.

    eemom

    March 6, 2012 at 9:58 pm

    C’mon Ohio. Come to Mama……

  115. 115.

    amk

    March 6, 2012 at 9:58 pm

    any good news for john mccain yet ?

  116. 116.

    Calming Influence

    March 6, 2012 at 9:58 pm

    That bass player is a Catholic Priest. I’d put money on it.

  117. 117.

    MikeJ

    March 6, 2012 at 9:59 pm

    @Egg Berry:

    If this were hockey, Obama would have some enforcers skating at his side to knock the shit out of them when they tried to hit him.

    Obama’s teammates keep arguing with the ref that no, Obama did *not* in fact score a goal.

  118. 118.

    trollhattan

    March 6, 2012 at 9:59 pm

    I will revel in wonder if “I will restore our triple-A credit rating” carries the day in November. So very populist–our Willard. Ooh, abolish the “death tax” and cut taxes for Job Creators(tm).

    “And the DOD will be funded with unredeemed S&H Green Stamps.”

  119. 119.

    Gex

    March 6, 2012 at 9:59 pm

    @Omnes Omnibus: You owe me a new home office setup, dude. Soda. Everywhere.

  120. 120.

    Martin

    March 6, 2012 at 9:59 pm

    @trollhattan:

    Whoa, Willard just promised federal health care.
    __
    To veterans.

    Bold. The statistical processor give him a 83.2% of being able to implement that.

  121. 121.

    kay

    March 6, 2012 at 9:59 pm

    Romney looks furious.

    They should cut this speech short.

    Jesus. His eyes are just glinting and his
    jaw is all clenched.

  122. 122.

    pseudonymous in nc

    March 6, 2012 at 10:00 pm

    @Martin:

    don’t underestimate just how competent the Obama campaign is, particularly in contrast to this lot.

    The political campaign establishment is famous for being behind the times — because politicians of all stripes are small-c conservative and don’t like bringing in people whose ideas haven’t been tested and proven to work, given that you can’t call a mulligan on an election.

    Obama’s campaign team clearly brings the same data-driven skills to online campaigning (A/B testing, metrics and analytics) that are used in the broader world of marketing. These are people who take note of what Amazon or Google or Facebook is doing, not what Campaign X or Campaign Y did in 2002.

  123. 123.

    freelancer

    March 6, 2012 at 10:00 pm

    @jgaugust:

    Goddamnit, now I can’t NOT hear it. Thanks for that.

  124. 124.

    And Another Thing...

    March 6, 2012 at 10:01 pm

    @lamh35: I’ve wondered that too.

  125. 125.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 6, 2012 at 10:01 pm

    just clicking around to avoid most of this, I think Santorum and Romney have both promised to be a “president who tells the truth”. Do I want to know? What is Obama supposed to have lied about now?

  126. 126.

    Redhand

    March 6, 2012 at 10:02 pm

    RE this song:

    You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!

  127. 127.

    Bondirotta

    March 6, 2012 at 10:03 pm

    There is this aura of sadness and melancholy around Mitt. Like he really wanted to be a figure skater and has sacrificed his dreams to avenge his father. He cannot project aggression and triumphalism. He just doesn’t have the piss and the vinegar.

  128. 128.

    cbear

    March 6, 2012 at 10:03 pm

    Cute girls, but God can’t be pleased with all that dirty dancing and shaking around–that’s how Satan gets them to drop the aspirin and start luring and enticing the menfolk.

  129. 129.

    burnspbesq

    March 6, 2012 at 10:04 pm

    @Baud:

    “Is it just me, or does Romney look and sound really sad right now?”

    Romney is fully invested in the myth of his own inevitability. He’s having a what-do-you-mean-theres-no-Santa-Claus moment.

  130. 130.

    muddy

    March 6, 2012 at 10:04 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:
    @Bondirotta:

    I don’t have the sound on. He looks like he’s going to cry. It’s starting to fascinate me, I have no idea what he’s saying, but he tries to punch it up, but everytime he starts to lose tempo the the upbeat facial contortion slips.

    I think his sadness is real, he knows he’ll never be what he was supposed to be. His daddy will never be pleased.

  131. 131.

    beltane

    March 6, 2012 at 10:04 pm

    @amk: The good news for John McCain is that he looks like King Solomon compared to the marchers in this year’s fail parade.

  132. 132.

    Spaghetti Lee

    March 6, 2012 at 10:04 pm

    Mitt Romney: “I want to congratulate Senator Santorum and Speaker Gingrich for their victories in-oh, fuck it, I can’t do this anymore! What’s the matter with you plebes!? This was supposed to be my turn to be president! Me! You useless fucking clods can’t even recognize my genius when you see it! Well fuck you, you’re all fired!” (Storms off.)

  133. 133.

    garbo

    March 6, 2012 at 10:05 pm

    What must this be doing to Mittens? He’s the magical Republican “next in line,” he has big bucks, the right look, a willingness to be whatever anyone wants him to be, everything should be going right, and it’s all so wrong. He’s underwhelming, a laughingstock on late night and he just can’t fucking close the deal.

    How does that not screw with your head?

  134. 134.

    trollhattan

    March 6, 2012 at 10:05 pm

    @pseudonymous in nc:

    Obama clearly ran a near-genius campaign in ’08 and I think he can pick up a trick or two from Jerry’s governor race in California.

    Everybody is going to be sick to death of the Republican nom even before the convention.

  135. 135.

    Soonergrunt

    March 6, 2012 at 10:06 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    just clicking around to avoid most of this, I think Santorum and Romney have both promised to be a “president who tells the truth”.

    That would be a nice change from both their political careers to date, so there’s that.

  136. 136.

    Anne Laurie

    March 6, 2012 at 10:06 pm

    @lamh35:

    why does Romney’s eyes always looked red-rimmed like he had a big cry right before he came out?

    He’s allergic to people who earn less than $250,000 a year… in capital gains.

  137. 137.

    Spaghetti Lee

    March 6, 2012 at 10:06 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    Do I want to know? What is Obama supposed to have lied about now?

    Oh, just…everything. If Obama said he had pancakes for breakfast the GOP candidates would be crawling over each other to say they’ll have bacon and eggs when they’re in charge, like a real president would.

  138. 138.

    replicnt6

    March 6, 2012 at 10:06 pm

    Wait, why are they singing Gay Mom?

  139. 139.

    JGabriel

    March 6, 2012 at 10:06 pm

    @Johannes:

    “There will be justice for the unborn,” sure, but what about the undead? Who stands for them?

    Thank you. This is exactly what I want to know too. As a largely indoor and decidedly pale person, I often get mistaken for an Undead American — and it’s no picnic, let me tell you. No one should have to through that kind of discrimination merely for being undead.

    It’s shameful.

    .

  140. 140.

    Spaghetti Lee

    March 6, 2012 at 10:08 pm

    @garbo:

    Well, I can’t know exactly what’s going on in Mitt Romney’s head, but I’m betting something along the lines of FATAL_ERROR.exe

    But hey, perk up, Mittens! You won Massachusetts and Vermont, and we all know how crucial those states are in earning the trust of the GOP base.

  141. 141.

    MosesZD

    March 6, 2012 at 10:09 pm

    @lamh35: I’ve been saying that all along. You bring up Mormons around mid-western and southern voters and you’ll be ‘well informed’ to their ‘cultish, non-Christian’ status.

  142. 142.

    dmsilev

    March 6, 2012 at 10:10 pm

    Starting to tighten up in Ohio. Frothy up by 1.7%, 56% reporting. Whatever happens, Romney’s “I am inevitable” campaign theme is taking on water and is sinking fast.

  143. 143.

    Anoniminous

    March 6, 2012 at 10:11 pm

    Looks like Mittens lost another one.

    56% precincts reporting in ND with Santorum 45%, Romney 25%.

  144. 144.

    Kilkee

    March 6, 2012 at 10:12 pm

    Wait. Did Romney say he’d cut everyones’ taxes by 20%? I’m +3, but still, he might be that insane.

  145. 145.

    freelancer

    March 6, 2012 at 10:13 pm

    @dmsilev:

    64% in right now:

    Santorum: 276,526
    Romney: 264,062

    Santorum up 12,464 votes. It hasn’t been less than a 10,000 vote margin for the last hour or so.

  146. 146.

    geg6

    March 6, 2012 at 10:14 pm

    @Martin:

    The lack of signatures just gives you an idea of how non-existent his organization is. He would sweep Steubenville, all the media here say so and I agree.

    And that just tells you what a pitiful candidate Mittens is. The crazy Opus Dei guy with no organization and no money (comparatively) is giving him a run for his money in a crucial state where Mittens spent lavishly.

  147. 147.

    feebog

    March 6, 2012 at 10:16 pm

    Mrs. Feebog had to go to reruns of Two and a Half Men. Otherwise, I might be sleeping on the couch tonight. Seriously, I haven’t had this much fun since my Boy Scout Pack lifted our Pack Leaders VW Bug onto a picnic bench.

  148. 148.

    jgaugust

    March 6, 2012 at 10:17 pm

    @freelancer: Ha. You’re quite welcome. I just hope people start to hear it and then compare speech patterns with Obama. It’s not a pretty thing.

  149. 149.

    garbo

    March 6, 2012 at 10:17 pm

    @Spaghetti Lee: Then shouldn’t we be seeing his blue face of death?

  150. 150.

    General Stuck (Bravo Nope Zero)

    March 6, 2012 at 10:20 pm

    After watching Obama’s presser today, I just don’t care who the goopers pick to run against the guy. He is the best politician in this country, and now is a seasoned and experienced POTUS, and we have our own Karl Rove with David Plouffe, who is actually better than Rove who shamelessly used 9-11 for a prop to electoral success.

    Obama and co, are doing it with broader appeal than the Rovian 50 + 1 strategy that only worked by exploiting a national tragedy. What I saw today from our president was exquisite competence without a hint of excessive hubris, that was the hallmark of the Bushies.

    Anything can happen between now and election day, and it is inherently dangerous for the country and world having one party of a two party superpower functionally insane. But momma never said it was all sugar plum fairies, and every day is a risk, if you are alive on planet earth.

  151. 151.

    MosesZD

    March 6, 2012 at 10:20 pm

    I have new theme music for Mittens…

    http://tinyurl.com/49x92d3

  152. 152.

    Anoniminous

    March 6, 2012 at 10:21 pm

    @geg6:

    Dimwit or DesertMint or something like that is Santorum’s man in Ohio and he said earlier today Romney dropped $12 million on the Ohio race.

  153. 153.

    Marcellus Shale, Public Dick

    March 6, 2012 at 10:22 pm

    @Left Coast Tom:

    sulfa, they are old school, and because they refuse to believe in evolution they don’t need any new fangled anti-biotics.

  154. 154.

    RalfW

    March 6, 2012 at 10:22 pm

    Nate Silver looks like he’s saying Dems (ratfvking or for real (?!?)) may be a factor in Ohio.

    Veeeeery interesting.

  155. 155.

    Laen

    March 6, 2012 at 10:22 pm

    I have never posted before…relative newcomer to the forum. I played the video…I was waiting for the punchline…it had to be a joke…I was waiting for the punchline…the punchline never came! The punchline never came!

  156. 156.

    Martin

    March 6, 2012 at 10:23 pm

    @trollhattan:

    Obama clearly ran a near-genius campaign in ‘08 and I think he can pick up a trick or two from Jerry’s governor race in California.

    Run against an incompetent rich business leader with no charisma or credibility that can’t help but pander to the fringe?

    Yeah, I think Obama picked up that trick.

  157. 157.

    Darnell From LA

    March 6, 2012 at 10:24 pm

    Is it time for death yet?

  158. 158.

    West of the Cascades

    March 6, 2012 at 10:25 pm

    off-color update – Santorum leading among Republican voters in Ohio’s Licking County, 41 to 33 percent.

  159. 159.

    Mike in NC

    March 6, 2012 at 10:25 pm

    @Bondirotta:

    He just doesn’t have the piss and the vinegar.

    True. But does Rmoney get any points for being utterly full of shit?

  160. 160.

    geg6

    March 6, 2012 at 10:25 pm

    @Anoniminous:

    Had to have been DeWine. Former senator and professional asshole.

  161. 161.

    Anoniminous

    March 6, 2012 at 10:28 pm

    @geg6:

    I knew it was something like that!

    Thanks.

  162. 162.

    Left Coast Tom

    March 6, 2012 at 10:30 pm

    Run against an incompetent rich business leader with no charisma or credibility that can’t help but pander to the fringe?

    …and who drops over $115M of personal money on her/his own campaign? Something that Mittens has yet to do, and that in any case has to be multiplied by 8 to have the same “effect”?

    $115M times 8 is $920M…maybe Anne RMoney will get to live in her Cadillacs afterall.

  163. 163.

    Chris

    March 6, 2012 at 10:31 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    I think one of the under discussed aspects of Romney is his anger. He despises the Republican base and they’re making him grovel. He’s Nixon with better hair and money.

    I agree with the first two sentences, but Nixon’s hatred was never for the Republican base. It was people like Ovenmitt he loathed with a passion.

    (Which explains why the public responded so well to him and is responding so poorly to Mittens).

  164. 164.

    Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)

    March 6, 2012 at 10:33 pm

    @Martin: I thought the trick he’d learned was Run Against a Crazy Black Guy from Out of State Whose Eyes Bug Out So Far You Can See the Whites All the Way Around. Or was it Run Against a Wrinkled Caricature of a War Hero Who Has No Message and Panics When Confronted with Any Obstacle.

    I lose track of all of Obamas tricks.

  165. 165.

    Mark S.

    March 6, 2012 at 10:34 pm

    test

  166. 166.

    Chris

    March 6, 2012 at 10:34 pm

    @Spaghetti Lee:

    Well fuck you, you’re all fired!

    In Soviet Union, the help fires you! (Also in Republican elections, apparently).

  167. 167.

    Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)

    March 6, 2012 at 10:42 pm

    Down to a 6,000 vote lead with 75% of the precincts in. It’s gonna be tight.

  168. 168.

    Chris

    March 6, 2012 at 10:44 pm

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN):

    Down to a 6,000 vote lead with 75% of the precincts in. It’s gonna be tight.

    “The suspense is killing me. I hope it’ll last.”

  169. 169.

    cursorial

    March 6, 2012 at 10:46 pm

    @Spaghetti Lee: Plus Washington state caucuses, and an underwhelming victory over Paul in Virginia. Someone should post a filtered delegate count if we only include representation from real America.

  170. 170.

    Joel

    March 6, 2012 at 11:20 pm

    Nate Silver is tentatively predicting that Romney wins in Ohio.

  171. 171.

    Rick Taylor

    March 7, 2012 at 12:19 am

    I much prefer this version of game on.

  172. 172.

    SteveM

    March 7, 2012 at 6:59 am

    Is that Erick Erickson on bass?

    And I like that there’s a shot of hands playing a piano when there’s no piano on the song. Or maybe the piano is playing John Cage’s 4’33”.

  173. 173.

    flukebucket

    March 7, 2012 at 10:08 am

    @trollhattan:

    I love to hear folks who weren’t even born when he was President sing the praises of Ronald Reagan. It explains how bullshit is eternal.

  174. 174.

    HG Hay

    March 7, 2012 at 11:33 am

    It needs a rap interlude. Are The Young Cons, or those “knicker” (WINK! WINK!) guys available. Maybe a remix is in the works.

  175. 175.

    ginger

    March 7, 2012 at 12:37 pm

    @jrg: Actually, they’ve gone overseas pretty much every single year. They’ve spent 9 months living in Libera, Africa on a mission trip, and no, that’s not the only one.

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