Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

There are no moderate republicans – only extremists and cowards.

It may be funny to you motherfucker, but it’s not funny to me.

Yeah, with this crowd one never knows.

If America since Jan 2025 hasn’t broken your heart, you haven’t loved her enough.

Come on, media. you have one job. start doing it.

🎶 Those boots were made for mockin’ 🎵

Compromise? There is no middle ground between a firefighter and an arsonist.

Republicans don’t want a speaker to lead them; they want a hostage.

The lights are all blinking red.

You are so fucked. Still, I wish you the best of luck.

GOP baffled that ‘we don’t care if you die’ is not a winning slogan.

The real work of an opposition party is to oppose.

We know you aren’t a Democrat but since you seem confused let me help you.

Books are my comfort food!

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

Not all heroes wear capes.

The press swings at every pitch, we don’t have to.

President Musk and Trump are both poorly raised, coddled 8 year old boys.

Let there be snark.

Today in our ongoing national embarrassment…

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

How any woman could possibly vote for this smug smarmy piece of misogynistic crap is beyond understanding.

Many life forms that would benefit from greater intelligence, sadly, do not have it.

Reality always lies in wait for … Democrats.

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Just finished watching Smash, and if you aren’t watching that show you are missing out. This is where all the haters call me a girly-man, and I simply respond with Katharine McPhee in dance tights, Katharine McPhee in a TBD, and Katharine McPhee in her James Brown rendition last week. Suck it haters.

Reader Interactions

77Comments

  2. 2.

    OzoneR

    Anybody want to take a crack at the two polls today showing Obama’s approval rating tanking over gas prices?

  4. 4.

    Cacti

    @OzoneR:

    Anybody want to take a crack at the two polls today showing Obama’s approval rating tanking over gas prices?

    Everybody’s polls going down at the same time makes me think some sample tweaking is afoot to gin up the general election horse race.

  7. 7.

    Mike D.

    Girlfriend CANNOT act, unless she happens to be singing at the same moment. It’s like she’s not really there when she’s just delivering lines, which then makes her professional-actor castmates’ actual animation make her look all the worse by comparison. Nothing wrong with that – just be a singer, not an actor.

    Nevertheless, I suspect I ‘respond’ to her in exactly the same way.

  8. 8.

    ulee

    Katherine McPhee as a Walker… that would be funny. I don’t need two dimensional darlings. Zombies are fine.

  10. 10.

    jl

    I am beginning so suspect there is some Theatuh blood running through Cole’s veins.

    See if anyone can talk him into putting on a Balloon Juice musical. Commenters could send in audition clips.

    Except I guess Lily and Rosie get dibs on the roles of Dog One and Dog Two, and Tunch will be the Cat. So no one bother with those parts.

    We can let the front pagers fight it out for Maestro Behind the Curtain. That parts belongs to Cole, but I imagine modesty would prevent him from producing directing AND starring.

    Edit: Cole, check for vaudeville trunks someplace in your parents house and their revelations about their secret past lives. Or if that does not pan out, prepare to hear that you were adopted from a dashing and romantic theatre couple who came through town doing a show long ago.

  11. 11.

    The Dangerman

    @jl:

    That parts belongs to Cole, but I imagine modesty would prevent him from producing directing AND starring.

    This isn’t a p0rn shoot, right?

  13. 13.

    Calming Influence

    Whatthefuck is Smash? I’ll give it a go,as long as it doesn’t conflict with American Pickers.

  14. 14.

    Linda

    McPhee is the weakest part of the show. She is one-dimensional and can’t really sing or dance.

    The Broadway numbers are the best and Megan Hilty is awesome. I do like this show but fear for its future.

  15. 15.

    Hill Dweller

    @OzoneR: Gallup has Obama up to 49%.

    The twitter machine is saying both polls changed their weighting to favor Republicans.

    Gas prices were high the last time they did polling. I can’t imagine the drop was the result of gas prices.

  17. 17.

    jl

    @The Dangerman:
    @J. Michael Neal:

    POrn or immodesty in WV? I cannot imagine something like that.

    Cole: you will need to screen audition videos carefully to keep out the riff raff. There maybe some of that type at this here blog, hate to say so.

  19. 19.

    gnomedad

    @jl:

    See if anyone can talk him into putting on a Balloon Juice musical. Commenters could send in audition clips.

    I like it. Or, once we have a script, we can sign up to shoot 15-second segments a la Star Wars Uncut.

  20. 20.

    jwb

    @Hill Dweller: Something odd seems to be going on, and I’ll be interested to hear your theory when you are ready to drop it. The general lack of commentary on these results in my twitter feed and on the blogs I visit is not at all usual.

  21. 21.

    Mnemosyne

    @Hill Dweller:

    The weirdest part of the CBS poll was that something like 54% of respondents thought the president can control gas prices. You’d think that’s the kind of result that would make a pollster wonder about the quality of responses he’s getting, but apparently not.

  22. 22.

    PoliticalHack

    @JS:

    Tight/Tiny Black Dress?

    Tenpin Bowling Derby?

    Terrapin Blue Dirigible?

    Pics would definitely bring clarity to this one.

  23. 23.

    Calming Influence

    I’d comment more frequently, but I’m busy piling shit up against my trailer to entice Mike and Frank, and maybe if I’m lucky (fingers crossed) Danielle!

  25. 25.

    The Snarxist Formerly Known As Kryptik

    @Mnemosyne:

    I swear to god that if Obama actually, by some freak chance of nature, loses the presidency because of fucking Gas Prices, I may as well hang myself, because it’ll show just how fucking backwards this country has gone.

  27. 27.

    OzoneR

    @Mnemosyne:

    The weirdest part of the CBS poll was that something like 54% of respondents thought the president can control gas prices

    Go in deeper, apparently Americans now agree with Republicans on contraception and want a war in Iran.

    That’s what raises questions. Are gas prices making them rethink their birth control positions?

  28. 28.

    Comrade Luke

    My Gonzaga Bulldogs got a 7 seed in the NCAA tournament, and drew 10 seed West Virginia. The game is being played in…Pittsburgh, 75 mi from WVU’s campus.

    Fucking bullshit.

  29. 29.

    jwb

    @OzoneR: It was the contraception responses that really floored me. I have many thoughts about what might have produced these results, none of them good.

  30. 30.

    General Stuck (Bravo Nope Zero)

    @OzoneR:

    I’d be surprised if rising gas prices didn’t make those polled to take it out on someone. And that is always the prez. Gallup has Obama at 49 percent, so go figure. Other polls have similar higher numbers.

    I’d look for dems and Obama to politick back at the speculators, and start talking up regulating those clowns and maybe submit a bill in the senate. It won’t make any difference in gas prices, and would have no chance of passing, but it could blunt any wingnut meme pushing the public to blame Obama.

    Otherwise it is early for taking polls too serious. The exception being ‘favorables’ polling for the candidates. That is likely the best number to gauge the state of a two man race that is a POTUS election at this stage. Obama is way out in front on that one.

  32. 32.

    JC

    It’s not your a girly man, you wouldn’t know good TV if it smacked you upside the head with 12 inches of limpdick.

    Chuck was for retards. Seriously. Something is wrong with anyone who could watch that gay ass show.

    WTF???

  33. 33.

    Hill Dweller

    @OzoneR:

    Go in deeper, apparently Americans now agree with Republicans on contraception and want a war in Iran.

    Those numbers would make sense if they were over-weighting republican men, which is the criticism I’m seeing.

  34. 34.

    MikeJ

    @OzoneR: That’s what raises questions. Are gas prices making them rethink their birth control positions?There must be some connection with the old ran out of gas ploy.

  37. 37.

    Xecky Gilchrist

    Anyone who’d use “girly-man” as an insult is on the wrong side of history, too.

  38. 38.

    Suffern ACE

    ‘@hill dweller – the American middle class has gotten behind every other war in my lifetime (and conveniently forget why they stopped loving it when the next one comes ariund) so I would not be surprised that the fact that we aren’t at war with Iran drives them crazy by the end of the summer. We do not prefer peaceful relations. It’s how we roll.

  39. 39.

    jwb

    Nate throws up his hands:

    This is what polling data looks like: at any given time, you are going to see some relatively stronger and weaker numbers for Mr. Obama and for the Republican candidates — both because of the different methodology employed by different polls and because of sampling error.
    __
    [snip]
    __
    Timing can also be a factor: the Monday Gallup poll, for instance, was conducted entirely over the weekend, after the relatively good February jobs report had been published. It’s possible that made some difference, but who knows. In the long-run, a poll published 238 days before an election is not going to be much more accurate than one conducted 236 days before the election — unless there has been some fundamental shift in the political environment.
    __
    For now, those fundamentals look mostly the same. So far, the rebound in consumer confidence has been fairly resilient to gas-price increases, for instance.

  40. 40.

    Crusty Dem

    @JC – I lol’d, I think you can find a parallel that might explain Cole’s Chuck love and Smash-appreciation.

  41. 41.

    brian

    “If you aren’t watching, you are missing out.” Is this how one has to speak to become a successful Intarwebs personality? And what is this television you speak of?

  42. 42.

    Mnemosyne

    @jwb:

    I wish he’d addressed some of the other weird anomolies that people have noticed, like the sudden decline in support for insurance coverage of birth control.

  43. 43.

    Punchy

    So any LMJ in a TBD will give you a RHO, eh? I guess its OK, as long as shes not a POS PITA MILF

  44. 44.

    jwb

    @Mnemosyne: Well, if he addressed those anomalies, he’d have to come out and say the poll sucked. Has he done that with a poll sponsored by NYT since he moved there?

  45. 45.

    David Koch

    The only interesting new fact from the movie “Game Change” is how expensive it is to conduct a poll.

    For those who didn’t see it, at one point Palin demands a poll of Alaska, and the campaign manager resists because it’s so expensive ($60,000 to poll the 2nd smallest state in the union) and because Alaska wasn’t in contention.

    If it costs $60K to poll Alaska’s population of 750K, think how much it costs to poll the entire country of 311 million.

    And therefore, publicly traded companies like CNN, WaPo, and NYT just aren’t going to put the resources into producing a quality poll. They don’t have to. They’re not running for office. Their poll is simply for infotainment purposes. So they cut costs and cut corners. The result is volatility.

  47. 47.

    Irony Abounds

    I explained the poll numbers, but when I tried to submit it sent me to mobile site and wouldn’t post. I must say, I’m really tired of this mobile site snafu, it makes the damn site unreadable.

  50. 50.

    asiangrrlMN

    @jl: I actually had an idea to write a BJ musical. It’s almost ScriptFrenzy time. Maybe I’ll give it a go. The question is, what part would be played by Alan Rickman? All my plays have a role for Alan Rickman.

    @gnomedad: To me, this is the worst part of all these smears – the destroying of individuals’ reputations. Janet Bell spoke well on Professor Bell’s behalf.

    ETA: Gluten-free pretzels are delicious.

  51. 51.

    Martin

    @David Koch:

    If it costs $60K to poll Alaska’s population of 750K, think how much it costs to poll the entire country of 311 million.

    It costs exactly the same. Sample sizes are likely to be roughly the same. Alaska might be 1000 LVs, the nation 3000, tops. The cost of having the poll developed is likely the same as well, assuming they’re asking a similar number of questions – and they don’t vary by too much.

    In fact, the standard approval polls are cheaper because there’s really no survey to develop, unlike what was described in the movie which is to solicit a specific set of opinions, so the survey needs to be custom developed – and the sample set as a result is likely to have to be somewhat unique as well. She wanted to know approval back home – not really the same thing as dipping into the LV database.

  53. 53.

    RadioOne

    Hey! I watched the first three episodes of that show before giving up on it! I wanted to like it! There’s just too many other good shows to catch up on right now. I’ll give it another shot if the season is released on Netflix and I have time for it.

  56. 56.

    BGinCHI

    @JCJ: Jesus, late to the thread, but it looks like we have an Everton fan here.

    I’m sorry, but I’m gonna have to taze you, bro.

    (I honestly don’t dislike Everton, but we’re going to beat you. Sorry.)

  57. 57.

    suzanne

    @asiangrrlMN:

    The question is, what part would be played by Alan Rickman? All my plays have a role for Alan Rickman

    That’s amazing. All of mine have a hot sex scene with me and Robert Downey, Jr.

  58. 58.

    Rita R.

    @David Koch:

    I believe that polls like this tie their sampling to what the pollsters predict the makeup of those who turn out to vote in the election will be. But I can’t imagine what could have happened in the last couple of weeks to make them believe the voters who’ll show up in November will be more Republican — particularly more white, male and rural — than their previous predictions. If anything, I would think that with the uproar over contraception it would be the opposite.

    I’m usually not one for conspiracy theories, but it makes your explanation more plausible to me. I wouldn’t put it past them, and I know all the endless debates boosted the cable nets’ ratings.

  60. 60.

    Martin

    Looks like housing prices are going to start to turn around about the time of the election. Corporate vacancies continue to drop, rents are climbing. Housing demand lags both by about 6 months. Commercial construction is picking up in selected markets. Retail vacancy is quite low, so that sector is picking up as well.

    Bad trends for the GOP.

  62. 62.

    asiangrrlMN

    @suzanne: I did a screenplay that had really really hot scenes between Alan Rickman and me, er, the leading character. I had to expand the screenplay to a trilogy because I spent way too much time on Alan and me. Er, the leading character.

    @nellcote: What was I thinking? Method acting at its finest!

  63. 63.

    ruemara

    Smash. No thanks. Not unless she develops a super power or has to vamps to kill. Warbling and screeching about putting on a play? Absolutely no thank you. Bring back Chuck!

  69. 69.

    Kerr Lockhart

    Never understood the meme about musicals being gay. First of all, my Naval officer father loved musicals. Second, as I tell my students, which is more gay, joining a sports team and hanging out in the locker room with sweaty men in their jocks or joining the school musical and hanging out backstage with a bunch of barely-dressed women? Chinese food is not Jewish because Jews like it and musicals are not gay because there are a lot of gay fans. Like JC says, suck it!

  71. 71.

    vernon

    Pssst—hey Cole—they stick gorgeous chicks in ragingly stupid productions all the time, hoping to distract from the raging stupidity—think Broadway plays, fashion shows, Michael Bay movies, etc. I guess there was a time when I would put up with the stupid for the sake of the T&A … then I turned 14 …

  72. 72.

    chopper

    alright, seriously. i’m going to Pacific Standard this week and trying a Santorum cocktail.

    will report back. i’m hoping it’s as frothy as its namesake.

  74. 74.

    Peter VE

    What happened to Anjelica Huston? It looks like her face transplant didn’t take… Katherine McPhee. Deborah Messing. What’s not to like?

  75. 75.

    Peter VE

    What happened to Anjelica Huston? It looks like her face transplant didn’t take… Katherine McPhee. Deborah Messing. What’s not to like?

  76. 76.

    MCA1

    I saw about 20 minutes of that abomination when my wife was watching it a week or two ago. She was embarrassed that I caught her watching. Pure excrement. Terrible writing + stiff acting + overall theme of navel-gazing narcissism = completely pointless crap. They tried to take Glee, dress it up for so-called adults, and then cross it with Fame or something. So it’s not only shitty, it’s derivative and shitty at the same time. Why anyone would waste their time on this kind of corrosive sludge when we’re in a golden age of televised drama, with at least 10 hours a week of seriously high quality stuff on the tube that’s better than almost anything coming out of the movie studios, is beyond me.

    Since we all so love to psychoanalyze our gracious host from afar, I suspect Cole is Stockholm Syndromed to the old media model of event television, planning his viewing around a network-dictated schedule, and likes the routine and comfort it provides; and feels adrift just thinking about the vast, open waters of the whole Hulu/Netflix thing and the idea that AMC, not NBC, might carry the two best shows on television. Also, too, you kids get off my La-Z-Boy!

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