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You are here: Home / Another Milepost On The Road To Oblivion

Another Milepost On The Road To Oblivion

by Zandar|  April 3, 20125:55 pm| 76 Comments

This post is in: #notintendedtobeafactualstatement, Assholes, Blatant Liars and the Lies They Tell, Clown Shoes, Our Failed Media Experiment, Wingnut Event Horizon

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Is it irresponsible to speculate if President Obama threatened Chelsea Clinton’s life in order to win the 2008 primary, like FOX News anchor Heather Childers does?

 

It’s irresponsible not to, of course.  But the whole “Bush fee-fees were impugned” happened, so all’s fair cause politics ain’t beanbag.

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76Comments

  1. 1.

    Scott

    April 3, 2012 at 5:57 pm

    What is this I don’t even

  2. 2.

    Emma

    April 3, 2012 at 5:57 pm

    Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. And I’ll bet she’ll identify herself as a good Christian, too. What price Thou Shalt Not Bear False Witness?

  3. 3.

    Scott

    April 3, 2012 at 6:00 pm

    Has anyone asked her about the black helicopters and the salt mines in Utah? Maybe about whether the Discordians will use an action token on the Fiendish Fluoridators to destroy the Goldfish Fanciers before the Gnomes of Zurich can defend them with the Mind Control Lasers?

  4. 4.

    slag

    April 3, 2012 at 6:00 pm

    Uh oh. They’re on to us. Damn! I knew the Obamas shouldn’t have terrorist fist-jabbed in public. The jig is up!

  5. 5.

    arguingwithsignposts

    April 3, 2012 at 6:00 pm

    There are not enough heads, nor desks, to quantify the stupid in that tweet.

  6. 6.

    Satanicpanic

    April 3, 2012 at 6:02 pm

    I saw him whistle at that white girl

  7. 7.

    Jeff Spender

    April 3, 2012 at 6:04 pm

    Did Obama assassinate Kennedy and kill Ken Lay? Inquiring minds want to know!

    It’s legitimate!

  8. 8.

    Professor

    April 3, 2012 at 6:04 pm

    What do you expect of Faux Noos? They are brainless lowlife!

  9. 9.

    ThatLeftTurnInABQ

    April 3, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    @Scott:

    Has anyone asked her about the black helicopters and the salt mines in Utah? Maybe about whether the Discordians will use an action token on the Fiendish Fluoridators to destroy the Goldfish Fanciers before the Gnomes of Zurich can defend them with the Mind Control Lasers?

     
    Ask her if hybrid cars are a leftist plot to ruin America. I read all about this in The Protocols of the Elders of Scion.

  10. 10.

    DFS

    April 3, 2012 at 6:06 pm

    @Scott: NEEEEEEEEEERRRRRD

    (for getting the reference I am of course at least as bad)

  11. 11.

    danielx

    April 3, 2012 at 6:10 pm

    Does Heather Childers partake of and enjoy a daily bowl of salted dicks? It would be irresponsible not to speculate…

    My, I’m feeling hostile. I may have to sit down and exchange vulgar and vile anecdotes with Sarah Proud and Tall over martinis and ibogaine.

  12. 12.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    April 3, 2012 at 6:10 pm

    I don’t know the individual FoxBots, but whenever they do something like this, I wonder if they’re this stupid, or so contemptuous of their base while at the same time so clueless about the world outside their network that they over-interpret their orders, i.e. the Oxord-educated Gretchen Whoozits talking about being “surprised” to look up “czars” and learn it means “kings”!

    I picture a red-faced Roger Ailes standing behind his desk, bellowing into the phone, as chunks of corned beef sandwich fly out of his mouth, “AM I THE ONLY ONE HERE WHO KNOWS HOW TO PLAY THIS GAME?”

  13. 13.

    Bubblegum Tate

    April 3, 2012 at 6:11 pm

    @Emma:

    And I’ll bet she’ll identify herself as a good Christian, too. What price Thou Shalt Not Bear False Witness?

    The Cavuto Mark is god’s favorite loophole.

  14. 14.

    Killjoy

    April 3, 2012 at 6:12 pm

    We’ve hit Peak Wingnut. This time for sure!

  15. 15.

    Alison

    April 3, 2012 at 6:13 pm

    Jiminy fucking crickets. I’d laugh if it wasn’t so God damn depressing and frightening, that people really do see Obama as this dangerous, malicious, murderous thug. I just cannot even comprehend that.

    Jesus take the wheel, and drive us off a cliff, please.

  16. 16.

    Gex

    April 3, 2012 at 6:13 pm

    @Emma: If you’ve watched the religious right the last decade, lying for Jesus is not only okay, it is demanded.

  17. 17.

    jl

    April 3, 2012 at 6:14 pm

    Barry Obama, Mayan Apocalypse, 2012. Coincidence?

    Sub Enquirer minds want to know.

    Edit: I guess the important speculation about Chelsea inheriting the international Clinton drug cartel, and how many she will kill to keep it, will be put on hold until HRC runs for something again.

  18. 18.

    arguingwithsignposts

    April 3, 2012 at 6:15 pm

    @DFS: Would a RAW reference qualify as nerd?

  19. 19.

    TooManyJens

    April 3, 2012 at 6:15 pm

    Now she’s claiming on Twitter that because she used the Cavuto Mark, it’s all good. (EDIT: I see Bubblegum Tate beat me to it.)

    Why are they such fucking terrible human beings?

  20. 20.

    kay

    April 3, 2012 at 6:17 pm

    I can’t help it, I think that’s hysterical. They’re absolute clowns. They’ve gone beyond hacks to parodies of hacks.

    Do we have to pretend she’s a serious person who has to apologize, or can we just point and laugh?

    I need guidance.

  21. 21.

    TenguPhule

    April 3, 2012 at 6:17 pm

    The bloody purge of stupid can’t come fast enough.

  22. 22.

    arguingwithsignposts

    April 3, 2012 at 6:18 pm

    @TooManyJens: Did Heather Childers murder Jesus in AD 33 to keep him from revealing his 9-9-9 plan to erase poverty from the earth?

  23. 23.

    burnspbesq

    April 3, 2012 at 6:18 pm

    If the media can do this with impunity, we need to rethink New York Times v. Sullivan.

  24. 24.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    April 3, 2012 at 6:18 pm

    @Bubblegum Tate: @TooManyJens: my goodness. Miss Childers is a firm believer in digging her way out of a hole

    Heather Childers ‏ @HeatherChilders Reply Retweet Favorite · Open
    Thoughts??? Supreme Court: Authenticity of Obama’s birth certificate “cause for concern” http://shar.es/pLIQJ

  25. 25.

    MattF

    April 3, 2012 at 6:19 pm

    Can you even imagine what would happen if Obama ever actually did anything scandalous in the real world? The mind boggles…

  26. 26.

    jl

    April 3, 2012 at 6:19 pm

    @arguingwithsignposts: No, Obama and Saul Alinsky did that, between orgies with hookers and blow, supplied by the international Clinton drug cartel.

  27. 27.

    jl

    April 3, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    Another Milepost On The Road To Oblivion The Onion.

  28. 28.

    arguingwithsignposts

    April 3, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    @jl: Stupid me, I forgot about the Obama Time Machine. Maybe he’s really Dr. Who.

  29. 29.

    Violet

    April 3, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    @arguingwithsignposts:
    It would be irresponsible not to speculate!

  30. 30.

    Southern Beale

    April 3, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    HOLY FUCKING SHIT !!!

    This guy trying to pull a James O’Keefe is a staffer for Michigan GOP Congresscritter Thad McCotter!!!!

  31. 31.

    Tonal Crow

    April 3, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    When the GOP hits your eyes,
    With their giant-ass lies,
    Prop-a-ganda!

    When teh stupid’s so strong,
    That you think they’ve gone wrong,
    Prop-a-ganda!

    —-

    This is just another installment in the GOP’s carefully-constructed campaign to replace rational public discourse with bullshit.

    Because once the public accepts bullshit as its preferred means of determining reality, it will become impervious to rational argument.

    And you know who makes rational arguments? Liberals. And scientists.

  32. 32.

    David Koch

    April 3, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    Meanwhile, the PUMAs are shouting “I KNEW IT!”

  33. 33.

    The Other Chuck

    April 3, 2012 at 6:23 pm

    #FuckMeGentlyWithAChainsaw

    (who the hell is Heather Childers?)

  34. 34.

    Warren Terra

    April 3, 2012 at 6:24 pm

    Did anyone get out of the boat to look at whatever bilge she linked to? I’m just wondering if this is pure speculation or if they’ve heard it from someone whose hairdresser’s cousin’s neighbor’s best friend’s uncle totes saw it happen.

    ETA Oh, and also:
    1) I assume she won’t be fired over this. We can only imagine what would have happened if a minor anchor at a real news network had suggested something half so libelous about Dubya.
    2) As to the people asking who she is, isn’t it obvious? Fox “News” has a policy of hiring young, beautiful, usually blonde women to say hateful things, and of dressing them rather provocatively. They’re usually rather interchangeable, and they usually don’t have their own shows in the same way that the (mostly older, homelier, more individually branded) male anchors do. It’s something of a meme. Just Google “Fox News Anchorwoman” sometime to see what I mean.

  35. 35.

    General Stuck (on self glorifiication)

    April 3, 2012 at 6:25 pm

    Big scary black man thug card is all the wingers got left, making shit up as fast as their tiny tea tard branes can spin the lies. By the time the election rolls around, Stalin on his most evil day will not compare to the web of sinister tales told on Obama, gonna get ya honkey suckas!!

    And the Pro left will gather the little pointy head children and deeply, thoughtfully, stroke its alpha lib beard, and ask to hear more, noting their concern with the ominous tone of it all, wondering if there’s any twoof to conservative fears. While extolling the seriousness of the epic courage and virility of Paul “Revere” Ryan with his serious throbbing wingnut Budget to turn the country upside down to be shaken by its feets for any loose change that belongs to the rich.

  36. 36.

    arguingwithsignposts

    April 3, 2012 at 6:25 pm

    @Warren Terra:

    Did anyone get out of the boat to look at whatever bilge she linked to?

    You couldn’t pay me enough Koch Kash to swim in those waters. The mangoes are probably beyond putrid.

  37. 37.

    kay

    April 3, 2012 at 6:26 pm

    Okay, I checked, she’s a “straight news anchor”, whatever that might mean at FOX, so I suppose convention demands that she keep that charade going a while.

  38. 38.

    Violet

    April 3, 2012 at 6:26 pm

    Did Heather Childers abuse that cute little dog she’s holding in her Twitter picture? It would be irresponsible not to speculate.

  39. 39.

    Ben Cisco

    April 3, 2012 at 6:27 pm

    @Alison:

    Jesus take the wheel mouse

    h/t ABL 2.0.

    Also, crazy Fauxbot is crazy. As if anyone at that channel would give a flying fuck about Chelsea Clinton’s safety. FAIL!

  40. 40.

    Martin

    April 3, 2012 at 6:27 pm

    And of course the thing anyone does after threatening someone’s children is ask them to take a major leadership position in their administration – particularly if that individual is well known to have personally killed a Deputy White House counsel.

    Even on the spectrum of conspiracy theories, this one is ultra stupid.

  41. 41.

    David Koch

    April 3, 2012 at 6:29 pm

    Obama would be crazy to threaten Chelsea, considering Hillary showed no compunction when killing Vince Foster and Ron Brown.

  42. 42.

    piratedan

    April 3, 2012 at 6:29 pm

    and prey tell young lady, What happened next after you asked Barrack Obama to bust up that chiffarobe?……

  43. 43.

    Ana Gama

    April 3, 2012 at 6:31 pm

    Was it the peroxide that rotted Heather’s brain or the cocaine? Thoughts?

  44. 44.

    David Koch

    April 3, 2012 at 6:32 pm

    @kay:

    she’s a “straight news anchor”, whatever that might mean at FOX

    That means she doesn’t do women, like the other sluts at fixxed news.

  45. 45.

    TooManyJens

    April 3, 2012 at 6:38 pm

    @David Koch: Look, I know you’re trolling, but can we please just skip calling women sluts because we don’t like them?

  46. 46.

    ThatLeftTurnInABQ

    April 3, 2012 at 6:39 pm

    @kay:

    “straight news anchor”

     
    = totally-not-gay booth babe.

  47. 47.

    WereBear

    April 3, 2012 at 6:44 pm

    @kay: I can’t help it, I think that’s hysterical. They’re absolute clowns. They’ve gone beyond hacks to parodies of hacks.

    I hope so. I know younger people see it that way.

    Heaven bless Stephen Colbert.

  48. 48.

    Ben Cisco

    April 3, 2012 at 6:44 pm

    @Ana Gama: I don’t discount the theory that it was both.

  49. 49.

    Jerzy Russian

    April 3, 2012 at 6:47 pm

    @kay:

    Do we have to pretend she’s a serious person who has to apologize, or can we just point and laugh?

    I need guidance.

    Just point and laugh.

  50. 50.

    kay

    April 3, 2012 at 6:48 pm

    @efgoldman:

    I love the elaborate partitioning people try to do with FOX.

    There’s the GOP hacks from 6 AM to 10 AM, then the noon hack line-up, then the evening crowd.

    The 10 minutes left over is “straight news”.

    Who has time for all these incredibly subtle distinctions?

    Just call them all hacks and be done with it. This media etiquette is too complicated.

  51. 51.

    Ben Cisco

    April 3, 2012 at 6:51 pm

    Part of me is pissed b/c I know full well this Ferengi Media troll is just humping for attention, but Jiminy Harkonnen Christo in a wetsuit that is some Galaxy-class stupid.

  52. 52.

    gnomedad

    April 3, 2012 at 6:51 pm

    Thoughts?

    No, they’re not. Next question.

  53. 53.

    scav

    April 3, 2012 at 6:53 pm

    What is clearly absent in the twittersphere is the silent shuffle as everybody moves away from the weird shouty person.

  54. 54.

    j

    April 3, 2012 at 6:54 pm

    Thought:

    Is it possible that Heather Childers is directly and personally responsible for over 50% of all venereal disease cases contracted west of the Mississippi in the last 10 years?

    Hey, “it’s out there”!

  55. 55.

    Enhanced Voting Techniques

    April 3, 2012 at 6:55 pm

    I went to the website she linked to and I wonder if it’s an Onion like parody. The Title “Godfather Politics; it’s not personal, it’s politics” seems like a tip off

  56. 56.

    Omnes Omnibus

    April 3, 2012 at 6:56 pm

    @kay: I say point and laugh. These people have forfeited any presumption of seriousness.

  57. 57.

    David Koch

    April 3, 2012 at 6:58 pm

    @TooManyJens: you’re too sensitive. I’m glad you weren’t around to ask Norman Lear to tone down Carroll O’Connor’s script.

  58. 58.

    Gex

    April 3, 2012 at 7:19 pm

    Oh thank God we finally have a man to tell us we’re being too sensitive. I was almost upset that we just call women sluts for fun but I know better now.

    I also learned that conversation between people is just like a piece of written art meant to parody.

  59. 59.

    Heliopause

    April 3, 2012 at 7:25 pm

    What a fucker, forcing Hillary to be Secretary of State and Bill to live on a few tens of millions in speaking fees.

  60. 60.

    runt

    April 3, 2012 at 7:31 pm

    Ah, the good old Cavuto mark: “Is Heather Childers a whore? What? I’m not saying she’s a whore, I’m just asking if she’s a whore!”

  61. 61.

    Suffern ACE

    April 3, 2012 at 7:36 pm

    Well I guess we now know what the real security concerns were that caused the Obama invitation to the Clinton wedding to go missing in the mail.

  62. 62.

    Ken

    April 3, 2012 at 7:38 pm

    @Violet: I noticed that, too. In the photo, which one is Heather?

  63. 63.

    trollhattan

    April 3, 2012 at 7:40 pm

    I’ve no idea who this nitwit is, but did see “Heathers” so there’s that.

    She does not seem to have good conspirafu.

    Also, too, is the little dog’s name Frenchie from the Frank Zappa song “Dirty Love”? It would be irresponsible to not speculate.

  64. 64.

    shpx.ohfu

    April 3, 2012 at 7:45 pm

    She claims “Fox anchors present both sides.” Can someone smart explain to a moron like me what “both sides” are in this issue?

  65. 65.

    slag

    April 3, 2012 at 7:48 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: I don’t know. Terrorist Fist Jab? lady got the boot. So, we could assume they’re just stupid. Or we could assume she was handed the mitten because she wasn’t bringing enough lonely, old white male eyeballs to the teevee and that stupid had nothing to do with it. Tough call.

  66. 66.

    Heliopause

    April 3, 2012 at 7:50 pm

    @efgoldman:

    Won’t anybody think of poor Chelsea? She’s probably scared out of her wits and keeping an extremely low profile.

  67. 67.

    Joseph Nobles

    April 3, 2012 at 7:51 pm

    Oh, man. NBC has admitted to a seriously stupid edit of the Zimmerman police call. They cut out the dispatcher asking Zimmerman whether the person he was observing was black, white, or Hispanic. The way they played it, it sounded like Zimmerman just spontaneously offered that info.

    Well, Eric Wemble at WaPo has posted about this and OMG the comments are like the second coming of Kerning Dan Rather. It’s got to be linked by the Breits or somebody like that.

  68. 68.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    April 3, 2012 at 8:08 pm

    @shpx.ohfu:

    She claims “Fox anchors present both sides.” Can someone smart explain to a moron like me what “both sides” are in this issue?

    Fox speaks to the nitwits and the halfwits.

  69. 69.

    Emma

    April 3, 2012 at 8:42 pm

    @Gex: Oh, I know. But it’s still depressing to watch.

  70. 70.

    TooManyJens

    April 3, 2012 at 8:45 pm

    @David Koch: It’s like you never heard of Sandra Fluke. Some of us are still a little raw about that, OK? Is it really worth rubbing salt in the wound for a two-bit, unoriginal blog comment? At least Norman Lear’s scripts were well written.

  71. 71.

    bogdan

    April 3, 2012 at 9:15 pm

    The comments on that site are quite entertaining. Just one big ole shit hole of crazy birthers.

  72. 72.

    Elie

    April 3, 2012 at 9:40 pm

    Frankly, Zandar — I want to know what the eff is wrong with YOU for dignifying this crap by replicating it on this site? R U crazee?

    Seriously. Uz yr brain more. A LOT more.

  73. 73.

    amk

    April 3, 2012 at 10:17 pm

    @runt: Thanks for that classic stewart clip. He was so much better those days.

  74. 74.

    CardinalRed

    April 3, 2012 at 10:51 pm

    @David Koch: surprised Lewinsky is still among the living….

  75. 75.

    CardinalRed

    April 3, 2012 at 10:55 pm

    @efgoldman: “They’re in the area around Tikrit and Baghdad and east, west, south and north somewhat.”

Comments are closed.

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  1. From Pine View Farm » Blog's archive » You Can’t Make This Stuff Up says:
    April 4, 2012 at 9:12 am

    […] But the wingnuts can. And do. […]

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