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You are here: Home / Past Elections / Election 2012 / Wednesday Night Open Thread: Schadenfreude Buffet

Wednesday Night Open Thread: Schadenfreude Buffet

by Anne Laurie|  April 26, 20121:08 am| 55 Comments

This post is in: Election 2012, Open Threads, Republican Stupidity, Assholes, Romney of the Uncanny Valley

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(Jim Morin via GoComics.com)

Big Hollywood, Big Politics, Big Hypocrites: According to NYMag‘s Joe Coscarelli, the Breitbrats are very, very offended:

Not only did Breitbart.com call President Obama’s “slow-jam the news” segment with Jimmy Fallon last night “possibly the worst ‘comedy’ segment in the history of mankind,” the site decreed that it violated a campaign-finance law: “Obama should be ashamed of himself (though, of course, he has no capacity for shame).” The FCC’s equal-opportunity rule states that if a broadcaster affords airtime to a candidate, equal time must be granted to “all other such candidates for that office.”…

But a recent FCC ruling sets a different precedent that would almost certainly include Late Night: Talk shows — in this case Anderson Cooper’s daytime chatfest, Anderson — qualify as bona fide newscasts. Furthermore, in a precedent set by Entertainment Tonight, the FCC noted that its role “is not to decide, by some qualitative analysis, whether one kind of news story is more bona fide than another.”

To which, of course, two immediate reactions:

(a) When did the self-described small-government-conservative Breitbrats fall in love with the heavy hand of the socialistic FCC?

(b) After what happened when Michele Bachmann appeared on Jimmy Fallon’s show, what deeply offensive & personally hurtful pop song would the Roots use for a Mitt Romney spot?

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Previous Post: « Republicans, #DontDoubleMyRate, and Flaming Pants
Next Post: Early Morning Open Thread: “Ready for the Fight” »

Reader Interactions

55Comments

  1. 1.

    Mnemosyne

    April 26, 2012 at 1:21 am

    Man, it’s hilarious to see the Breitbrats calling for the return of the Fairness Doctrine. They do realize that’s what they’re asking for, right?

  2. 2.

    Hill Dweller

    April 26, 2012 at 1:24 am

    They’ve got nothin’.

  3. 3.

    gaz

    April 26, 2012 at 1:25 am

    In the tradition of the incomparable TBogg, I’d like to suggest a few names for the Breitbart online megaplex of stupid:

    Brietbart’s Big Dumb Asshole
    Brietbart’s Big Alcoholism
    Brietbart’s Big Heart Condition

    too soon?

  4. 4.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    April 26, 2012 at 1:28 am

    @Mnemosyne: What do you think would happen if someone were to drop that into the comment section on one of their whining posts?

  5. 5.

    Yutsano

    April 26, 2012 at 1:30 am

    @The prophet Nostradumbass: Instant banning and constant calls for a countertop inspection.

  6. 6.

    Mnemosyne

    April 26, 2012 at 1:37 am

    @The prophet Nostradumbass:

    We need someone much subtler than me to write up a wingnutty-sounding comment that somehow manages to work in the words “fairness” and “doctrine” and post it over there.

  7. 7.

    Yutsano

    April 26, 2012 at 1:45 am

    Happy National Pengie Day!!

  8. 8.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    April 26, 2012 at 1:45 am

    So, I’m watching the Lawrence O’Donnell show, and Krystal Ball says that the first thing Obama should have done after the inauguration is to use his political capital to reform the Senate filibuster rule. I’d love to hear her explain how Obama could force the Senate to do that.

  9. 9.

    Suffern ACE

    April 26, 2012 at 1:51 am

    Today’s cery serious concern is that teenagers have figured out a way to kind of get the alcohol out of hand sanitizer and are drinking it. Now that the cases are up to crisis levels (6) I’m sure I’ll be having to give my license to get that soon. I’m expecting bath salt and cinnamon levels of concern.

  10. 10.

    gaz

    April 26, 2012 at 1:52 am

    @The prophet Nostradumbass: Apologies, I do not watch television. You said “Krystal Ball”? That’s her name? Seriously? Her parents must have hated her, or figured she’d be a stripper or something.

    I feel a little sad for her.

  11. 11.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    April 26, 2012 at 1:55 am

    @gaz: That is indeed her name, and was given to her by her parents.

    ETA: It gives some of the less intelligent out there a cheap way of making fun of her, that’s for sure.

  12. 12.

    paradox

    April 26, 2012 at 1:59 am

    Please excuse the anality, but why is the font different in the header? Also, too, it sucks, so sorry, please excuse me.

    [places palms together] Word to your mother.

  13. 13.

    Villago Delenda Est

    April 26, 2012 at 1:59 am

    @gaz:

    It would not have been too soon a nanosecond after the vile pig kicked.

    Irredeemable scum.

  14. 14.

    ruemara

    April 26, 2012 at 2:02 am

    @The prophet Nostradumbass: We really need smarter pundits on the left hand of politics. I’m getting sick of how clueless my supposed media reps are.

  15. 15.

    gaz

    April 26, 2012 at 2:03 am

    @The prophet Nostradumbass: I’m not making fun of her. I feel bad for her. I’m making fun of her parents. Not sure that’s any better, but there it is.

  16. 16.

    burnspbesq

    April 26, 2012 at 2:04 am

    When did the self-described small-government-conservative Breitbrats fall in love with the heavy hand of the socialistic FCC?

    Surely you’re not suggesting that they would act in an opportunistic or hypocritical manner! Oh, pshaw!

  17. 17.

    amk

    April 26, 2012 at 2:05 am

    Great toon.

    The whinefest from the right-wing is going to be unbearable till November.

  18. 18.

    amk

    April 26, 2012 at 2:07 am

    These fucksticks should be asked about the blatant rethug shilling by poxnews and sunday-know-your-republican love fests.

  19. 19.

    Spaghetti Lee

    April 26, 2012 at 2:12 am

    “possibly the worst ‘comedy’ segment in the history of mankind,”

    “An’, an’, Obama’s fat, and he smells funny, and he probably poops his pants! So there, libs! Plblblblblbl!”

    Seriously, this is all they’ve got?

  20. 20.

    Spaghetti Lee

    April 26, 2012 at 2:15 am

    I first heard of Ball, actually, when she ran for congress last year. Lost big in a heavily Republican district in Virginia, but I remembered the name. I don’t think her name was even the weirdest that year, though, what with Marionette Miller-Meeks also running in a losing effort in Iowa.

    My instinct is that if I was her I’d go by Kris or something, but hey, it’s probably good for a TV host to have a memorable name.

  21. 21.

    piratedan

    April 26, 2012 at 2:21 am

    liked this from LGF:

    http://littlegreenfootballs.com/page/275095_Just_in_Case_You_Were_Wonderin

    makes me all warm and fuzzy in my bipartisan pajamas knowing that these stalwart souls were willing to work with our President from the beginning.

  22. 22.

    Hill Dweller

    April 26, 2012 at 2:23 am

    Seriously, this is all they’ve got?

    The entire winger propaganda machine went into a fake rage today. Fox, blogs, radio. Hell, the RNC filed an official complaint with the GAO, alleging Obama campaigned on the tax payers’ dime.

    They’re desperate. And I suspect we’ll see this type of shit until the election.

  23. 23.

    Amir Khalid

    April 26, 2012 at 2:29 am

    (b) How about Hasa Diga Eebowai from The Book of Mormon?

  24. 24.

    Joseph Nobles

    April 26, 2012 at 2:32 am

    Gadzooks. The Breitbartians certainly threw The Half Hour News Hour down the memory hole, didn’t they?

  25. 25.

    karen marie

    April 26, 2012 at 2:49 am

    @Hill Dweller: It’s the slow drip, drip, drip that affects slow, low-information voters. It doesn’t need to make sense because the target audience isn’t paying enough attention to even consider whether it makes sense.

  26. 26.

    Burnspbesq

    April 26, 2012 at 2:49 am

    @Joseph Nobles:

    “Gadzooks. The Breitbartians certainly threw The Half Hour News Hour down the memory hole, didn’t they?”

    They surely tried, but there isn’t enough Nature’s Miracle in the universe to fully erase the stench and stain from that bit of runny poop.

  27. 27.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    April 26, 2012 at 2:54 am

    @gaz: I didn’t think you were making fun of her name, actually.

    ETA: Name.

  28. 28.

    gaz

    April 26, 2012 at 2:56 am

    @The prophet Nostradumbass: Don’t they have a subtext wordpress plugin yet?

  29. 29.

    Phoenician in a time of Romans

    April 26, 2012 at 2:56 am

    What really must have pissed them off is that an audience of non-vetted college students went bananas when Obama appeared by surprise. They simply can’t take the fact that he’s genuinely popular in precisely the way the RomneyBot M2.0 isn’t.

  30. 30.

    gaz

    April 26, 2012 at 3:03 am

    @Phoenician in a time of Romans: You know I hate to say this, but I think I’ve exhausted my supply of pithy observations about Willard. I really need him or Ann to stump tomorrow.

  31. 31.

    Spaghetti Lee

    April 26, 2012 at 3:06 am

    @karen marie:

    I think the average low-information voter would be more like ‘Obama was on TV? Isn’t that what famous people are supposed to do?” And the Breitbartian sputter against the GAO and the FCC would just wash over them. If the wingers want to get so worked up about such trivial bullshit, I say let ’em.

  32. 32.

    PeakVT

    April 26, 2012 at 3:08 am

    The FCC’s equal-opportunity rule states that if a broadcaster affords airtime to a candidate, equal time must be granted to “all other such candidates for that office.”…

    That would put Faux right out of business.

  33. 33.

    Shari

    April 26, 2012 at 3:21 am

    @The prophet Nostradumbass:

    I worked with a guy named “King Lear” and his twin sister was “Chanda”. No shit.
    Boy named Sue syndrome.

  34. 34.

    Suffern ACE

    April 26, 2012 at 3:24 am

    @PeakVT: Honestly, there is no rule that both candidates have to be on every show together at the same time. If Romney wants to go on Fallon, well I’m sure he could go in Fallon. Of for that matter, he can make a guest appearance on modern family for all I care.

  35. 35.

    MikeJ

    April 26, 2012 at 3:32 am

    @Hill Dweller:

    Hell, the RNC filed an official complaint with the GAO, alleging Obama campaigned on the tax payers’ dime.

    Maybe they would have preferred if he’d held a prime time fireside chat to inform the public about legislation the Republicans hate and every sane person agrees is a good thing?

    Fiiiiine. Obama won’t go on chat shows. He’ll just go on every channel at the same time.

  36. 36.

    Suffern ACE

    April 26, 2012 at 3:33 am

    @Shari: Hmmm. I wonder if Lear’s personal financial planner has him invested well so he can retire early, but has set up a charitable trust so that his kids can’t inherit any of it.

  37. 37.

    Amir Khalid

    April 26, 2012 at 3:49 am

    @Suffern ACE:
    Or will he leave it all to his youngest child, after being disappointed by her older siblings?

  38. 38.

    slag

    April 26, 2012 at 3:52 am

    The FCC’s equal-opportunity rule states that if a broadcaster affords airtime to a candidate, equal time must be granted to “all other such candidates for that office.”…

    Oh please please please let Fallon have Rmoney on to slow-jam the height of Michigan’s trees! Please!

  39. 39.

    karen marie

    April 26, 2012 at 3:53 am

    @Spaghetti Lee: What you say is true but they’re not doing it to change hearts or minds, it’s purely masturbatory, but it’s fed from above because keeping the low-information fringes primed is the goal. I’d bet money that low-information voters tend to vote Republican more often than Democrat by a margin. Anybody got polling data on it?

  40. 40.

    Joey Maloney

    April 26, 2012 at 4:33 am

    @Suffern ACE:

    he can make a guest appearance on modern family for all I care.

    Or The Biggest Loser.

  41. 41.

    Shalimar

    April 26, 2012 at 5:34 am

    The FCC’s equal-opportunity rule states that if a broadcaster affords airtime to a candidate, equal time must be granted to “all other such candidates for that office.”

    I’m sure Fallon would love to have Romney on his show. Just because he offers doesn’t mean the offer will be accepted.

  42. 42.

    ottercliff

    April 26, 2012 at 6:43 am

    Great. Give Willard equal time on Jimmy Fallon so we can all enjoy his awkward shtick.

  43. 43.

    Jamey

    April 26, 2012 at 7:12 am

    Makes me hope that whatever killed Blartbart was communicable.

  44. 44.

    honus

    April 26, 2012 at 7:54 am

    @gaz: Her father is a physicist who studies crystals. I also mentioned here once that he was from West Virginia and got accused of wanting to make racist and anti-semitic jokes too.
    And your stripper comment was precisely what Jennifer Kerns, the official California republican party mouthpiece tweeted about Ball’s name. Ball has a degree in economics from UVA, BTW.

  45. 45.

    Brian R.

    April 26, 2012 at 7:56 am

    As a Democrat, I strongly endorse the idea that Mitt Romney should be allowed — no, required! — to make an appearance on Jimmy Fallon and then slow jam the news with the Roots.

    I’m absolutely positive that it wouldn’t, in any way, come off sounding like an Osmond Family Christmas Special in which they attempt to show how hip they are by singing some Al Jolson tunes.

  46. 46.

    Suffern ACE

    April 26, 2012 at 8:02 am

    @Shalimar: I’m wondering if the point is to attack this way to explain why Romney doesn’t do casual interviews. The few on Fox have been awkward. If you avoid that by doing as few interviews and press conferences as possible, you can blame the press for not offering you time. Provides cove for your weakness.

  47. 47.

    honus

    April 26, 2012 at 8:21 am

    @Shari: Bill Lear (founder of the Lear Jet and inventor of the 8track tape) named his kids Shanda and Lava.

  48. 48.

    RalfW

    April 26, 2012 at 8:54 am

    @amk:

    The whinefest from the right-wing is going to be unbearable till November they loose the House and Senate, and Nancy Smash has outlawed being a titty baby.

    Fixt.

  49. 49.

    iLarynx

    April 26, 2012 at 9:05 am

    The FCC’s Equal Opportunity Rule is closely related (as in Chang and Eng close) to the FCC’s yet to be reinstated Fairness Doctrine which is the bogeyman of all right wing pundits. They don’t want to have to provide equal time to anyone countering their BS.

    For Republicans, “freedom” means their freedom to control everything (and everyone) else.

  50. 50.

    RalfW

    April 26, 2012 at 9:07 am

    @honus:

    Oh. My. Shanda Lear is now an entertainer and motivational speaker. I think her web site was constructed for about 300 bucks by a 57 year old nerd who petted his TRS-80 in jr. high.

    Thanks for a fascinating jump down a rabbit hole, honus!

  51. 51.

    honus

    April 26, 2012 at 9:59 am

    @RalfW:And John Lear is apparently a UFOlogist. It’s a deep rabbit hole. Lear’s only formal education was at the Moody Bible Institute, he was from hannibal, MO, and he worked with the great Earl “Madman” Muntz.

  52. 52.

    roseyviolet

    April 26, 2012 at 12:36 pm

    “The FCC’s equal-opportunity rule states that if a broadcaster affords airtime to a candidate, equal time must be granted to “all other such candidates for that office.”…”

    Is this even true anymore? I thought that was essentially the Fairness Doctrine, which no longer existed as far as I knew.

    I’m genuinely curious. Am I just confusing two completely different things?

  53. 53.

    Mike G

    April 26, 2012 at 12:57 pm

    Is ‘Anders Breivik’ Norwegian for ‘Andrew Breitbart’?

  54. 54.

    gex

    April 26, 2012 at 5:41 pm

    So wait. After shrieking loudly that “Nobama is going to force a Fairness Doctrine down the right’s manly heterosexual throats” but now they are demanding the Fairness Doctrine?

    I fucking hate these people. And every asshole who can’t pay attention long enough to tell the only rule is that they get what they want and everyone else, including their base, can take a flying leap. Fairness? That’s the last things these assholes want. They are asking for fairness after 30 years of refusing that kind of fairness in the news media.

    And good lord, Leno has always got whatever right wing sell out that comedy/talk show host sell out wants to have on.

    Driving up north this weekend. Maybe I’ll keep going until I get to Canada. Ask for asylum from the insane asylum.

  55. 55.

    gex

    April 26, 2012 at 5:53 pm

    @Shalimar: I’d love for Fallon to make the invite public. So these right wing assholes can be shut up for once, and then either to watch Romney chicken out or to fall flat on his ass. WIN-WIN-WIN.

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