VAGINA! UTERUS!
Remember last year when concerned Republicans in Florida got a case of the vapors and had to retreat to their fainting couches because a Florida Democrat used the term “uterus” during a floor debate? (I wrote about it here.)
In response to the senseless and reckless use of such a vile and repellent term, Florida spokeswoman Katie Betta said that it was important for members of both parties be “mindful of decorum during the debate,” and “mindful of and respectful to visitors and guests, particularly the young pages and messengers who are seated in the chamber during debates.”
Remember that? And remember how we laughed and cried, and it was better than Cats?
I think I may have even encouraged you to go spelunking in your ladyhole in order to discover what untold treasures lie within — treasures that make your netherbits so special that the mere mention of them would cause the collapse of civilization as we know it.
Well, it’s a year later and as it turns out, I may have been on to something. Apparently, not only is “uterus” an inappropriate and offensive term, but the word “vagina” is, too — at least in Michigan.
You know “vagina.” You either have one, or you know someone who has one. You definitely came out of one, and chances are you’re trying to get back inside of one right now.
Well, here’s a tip for all you Michiganders: if you’re successful in getting inside one, KEEP IT TO YOURSELF.
Whatever you do, don’t yell “Vagina!” like you would “Eureka!” upon discovering gold at the end of a rainbow, or gaining entrance to a highly coveted and special place. “Vagina” is offensive and will get you a proper scolding and banned from speaking if you dare use the term during a House debate about legislating vaginas:
[read the rest at ABLC]Brown, a West Bloomfield Democrat and mother of three, said a package of abortion regulation bills would violate her Jewish religious beliefs that pregnancy be aborted to save the life of the mother.
“Finally, Mr. Speaker, I’m flattered that you’re all so interested in my vagina, but ‘no’ means ‘no,'” Brown said Wednesday.
Brown’s comment prompted a rebuke Thursday by House Republicans, who wouldn’t allow her to voice her opinion on a school employee retirement bill.
“What she said was offensive,” said Rep. Mike Callton, R-Nashville. “It was so offensive, I don’t even want to say it in front of women. I would not say that in mixed company.”
Brown’s comments were published in Thursday’s Detroit News.
Majority Floor Leader Jim Stamas, R-Midland, determined Brown’s comments violated the decorum of the House, said Ari Adler, spokesman for the Republican majority.
“If I can’t say the word vagina, why are we legislating vaginas?” Brown asked Thursday at a hastily called Capitol press conference. “What language should I use?”
Brown noted “vagina” is the “medically correct term.”
“We’re all adults here,” she said.
Cris (without an H)
Johnson?
clean willie
What is that matter with you, Balloon Juice? At least Raw Story had the sense to leave this garbage on the curb.
Ben Franklin
That red snapper is scary.
me
Someone linked to this in the previous thread, and from there even more GOP misogyny. It’s like there’s some “be a jerk” talking points going around.
Litlebritdifrnt
@clean willie: Is someone holding a gun to your head and forcing you to be here? No? Well fuck off then.
Just Some Fuckhead
She could have used “tookie” and made the same point without embarrassing the boys.
Odie Hugh Manatee
They are truly “Hank Hill Republicans”.
@clean willie:
Vagina!
It’s like saying BOO! to a conservative except it actually scares them.
dr. bloor
Would “Mulva” be an acceptable substitute?
different-church-lady
The differences in reactions to this post vs. Cole’s just below ought to be… is “informative” the word I’m looking for?
amk
@clean willie: clean willie ? really ?
different-church-lady
@amk: Me senses sarcasm. You?
beltane
This reminds me of 10th grade Biology class. Some girl was putting on makeup and not paying attention during the segment on human reproduction when the teacher, an older Russian woman, made it a point to call on her and ask, “Ms. B__, could you tell us what your vagina is for?”
Rep. Callton should have gone to my high school, maybe he would have learned something.
BGinCHI
@dr. bloor: Dolores!
Going to change my personalized license plate from “assman” next year to “vaginadentata.”
I’m gonna need a bigger plate.
jl
@clean willie:
What garbage? I see the guy’s legislative contact info in the link. Why is that out of bounds?
If the link only give legislative contact info, then good.
These people are scary, the are violating the rights of government workers to do their work (NC prohibiting researchers from using their best judgment when predicting sea levels), they are violating the free speech rights of, and preventing elected officials from, doing their jobs (silencing reps in legislative chambers).
If you do not push back hard against these goons, they will come after you next.
They are already pushing policies that will get people, particularly women and children, killed, but in a way deemed acceptable by our society.
They have not seen much push back, so now they are taking the next steps. That is OK with you?
Why shouldn’t this public official’s public work info be available to everyone who wants to tell him to knock it off?
sparrow
Hmm, I think a long-distance phone call is in order…
quannlace
Mixed company? Exactly what kind of company does this ass move in? Half, I believe have vaginas and know it. The other half prefer to call it ‘pussy’ or the ‘c’ word?
Mnemosyne
I think the Oprah-approved term is “vajayjay.”
Jake Nelson
“You definitely came out of one”
Not true. I didn’t. I came out of a uterus, true…
(Pet peeve. Don’t assume!)
WJS
Yes, but there is no war against women. That’s just something shrill Democrats keep saying because there, um, actually is a war against women.
beltane
@Jake Nelson: But a vagina was nonetheless involved in your conception unless you are the result of IVF and egg transplantation the way Mitt Romney’s grandchildren are.
Egg Berry
@Just Some Fuckhead: I’m sure there’s a whole dictionary worth of words they could have used instead of vagina.
FuriousPhil
The Michigan legislature is filled with assholes like this guy. There’s a whole swath of Michigan that is more like Kansas in it’s politics, and then you have suburbs of Detroit and parts of the city that are relatively progressive, and not offended by correct names for parts of the body. Even in the red district I live in, you’re hardly going to offend by uttering ‘vagina’ or even ‘fuck’ in public…except maybe around small children. I don’t know though, I don’t associate with the religious right types around here so maybe they have a whole different protocol.
If this draws attention to the disgusting crap they’ve been pushing down everybody’s throats using legislative procedure to stifle debate, and push their radical agenda, then all the better. People in SE Michigan are starting to get more than a little irritated with the Tea Party, Pete Hoekstra, and the west side bible beaters, who can all go rot in hell as far as I’m concerned. At least they believe in the place. Been to Flint lately? Detroit? Our cities are fucking failing, and they feel the need to repeal our helmet laws and put forward crap like this abortion bill.
Todd
She needs to carry a fucking bullhorn onto the floor, in order to shout into it when she’s gaveled down.
My gender is really embarrassing me these days.
amk
@beltane: Bingo. Someone needs a fresh birds and bees lesson ?
Todd
She needs to carry a fucking bullhorn onto the floor, in order to shout into it when she’s gaveled down.
My gender is really embarrassing me these days.
Raven
I was camping on Orcas Island years ago and there was a women’s drum circle get together in the campground. I was in the little store at Doe Bay and asked if they had any coozies. I thought I was going to get drawn, quartered and fed to those cool sea otters. Here in Georgia a coozie was something that kept your beer cold. Not there!
Brachiator
@Egg Berry:
Everybody sing!
You say vagina, I say punani.
You say vagina, I say punani.
Vagina! Punani!
Vagina! Punani!
Let’s call the whole thing tw@t!
jayjaybear
Knit a vulva and send it to the Michigan Republicans…
emilytbm.blogspot.com/2008/10/knitted-vulva.html
Joshua Norton
I always thought “V-Jay Jay” was a cool term, but I doubt the old white dudes are street enough to handle it.
gelfling545
@Just Some Fuckhead: No. I’m sorry. The only possible term to use when conversing with these “gentlemen” (and even this is risky) is “um…you know…. down there” I’m afraid that Rep Brown greatly overestimates her fellow legislators in saying that they are all adults there.
BGinCHI
The “Lady Parts Monologues” really doesn’t have the same ring to it.
bemused
Oh my, what delicate flowers. If they almost faint at hearing the words uterus or vagina, they are some pathetic little wienies. You just know they have taught their own kids a bunch of silly, cutesy names for body parts.
LanceThruster
It’s as if they’re being overcome with hysteria. Maybe they need to be checked to ensure they’re not in possession of a concealed cooter.
Mattminus
Needs moar funny
jl
@Mattminus:
The new tag is promising. Cole will approve. Hopefully will contain more
uplifting, eelevating, aww, I give up, cheerful, content after November.Edit: can use the tag to report repeal, rollbacks of the lethal and hateful legislation after the nutcases and hatemongers are voted out of office.
Jake Nelson
@beltane: Sure. And I’m not arguing against anything in the post, just pointing out I didn’t, as the post said, come out of one. Just one of those things I have a thing about correcting when people make incorrect statements. Pedantic, I know, but it’s important to correct “we all X” statements- seen too many assumptions that everyone can see, walk, etc. hurt people, I find pointing out the small ones makes people think about things a little more.
As an aside, does your comment imply there’s something wrong with children born from IVF? Because I have two little cousins who I don’t think should get any flack from anyone over how they were conceived… (can’t recall if they were also caesarean or not.)
RossInDetroit
Two things to note:
Ms. Brown is from West Bloomfield, which is not the Bloomfield Hills where Rombot grew up, though it wishes it were.
The Detroit News is our local GOP paper. The Free Press is the Dem paper.
Litlebritdifrnt
You know I have not a great deal to get done at the office tomorrow. Methinks I might make some phone calls and send lots and lots of faxes.
Just Some Fuckhead
@Jake Nelson:
They’re fine as long as you don’t mind children without souls.
Jake Nelson
@Just Some Fuckhead: I don’t believe I’ve ever encountered another kind. Monsters, the lot of them.
beltane
@Jake Nelson: I do not have any problems with IVF. However, I do take issue with Mitt Romney’s extreme hypocrisy regarding this issue as he is on the record being against embryonic stem cell research and general shittiness regarding reproductive rights. It seems that he supports one set of rules for the plebes and another set of rules for his own very special children.
Older_Wiser
Lisa Brown said vagina and the men were thinking “cunt” about her.
And I thought misogyny was bad 50 yrs ago. Next I suppose Michigan, Georgia and those other assbackwards legislatures will want to mandate chastity belts with them holding all the keys.
Well, those legislators can go fuck themselves.
RD
I think we should call it the “Enigma Hole”, from which women can pull random (and occasionally useful) items from.
h/t Fat Chance.
jl
@RD:
Pink and red. You know who else was pink and red don’t you? Commies, that’s who.
How many women have gone on public record denouncing Stalin and Pol Pot and Castro? Hmmmm…..
lacp
Everybody here seems to assume that these bozos know what ‘vagina’ means. I don’t know that that can be taken for granted.
lacp
@dr. bloor: I thought that was some style of genital haircut.
fellatio Alger
Folks, I believe the politically acceptable term is “poontang.” Clinically speaking, of course.
Ruckus
VAGINA!
62 yr old white guy.
For fair and balanced, penis?
Roger Moore
@FuriousPhil:
I don’t think this is really about being offended by the term. This is about shutting down debate by finding any excuse to silence people saying what they don’t want to hear.
RossInDetroit
Well, this certainly has backfired on them. They wanted to silence her and instead the issue is in the newspapers and on at least the liberal blogs. Thanks, Republicans. Do some more of this silencing. We can use the press.
Villago Delenda Est
Apparently not, ma’am. Apparently not.
JGabriel
__
__
Republican Standards: It’s a sin for Democratic women to use the word vagina, but perfectly legitimate for a Republic man to call women bitch.
But there’s no war on women. No siree, Bob.
.
Egg Berry
Anyone else get the sense that image up top is just screaming for a cartoon bubble saying “Feed me, Seymour!”?
salvage
I hate that the few times I post here it’s to rip on ABL but this post is awful.
JR
I really hope someone objects every time someone in that House uses the word “member.”
different-church-lady
@fellatio Alger: That’s the Latin, yes.
Patricia Kayden
Curious to see what Michigan women/men are doing about this. Are they outraged as they should be? Organizing protests? Doing anything at all about this?
Seems like the Republican war against women has been pretty successful so far. Not much push back. And even when there is push back, the Repubs simply strike out the most controversial bits and pass their anti-women laws anyways, i.e., strike the vagina probes in Virginia, but still pass restrictions on abortion.
ABL 2.0
@salvage: i’m not sure if i will be able to find the strength to carry on.
~sniff~
Mnemosyne
@Egg Berry:
You win the internets for today.
different-church-lady
@fellatio Alger: I just noticed your handle, and now I can’t stop laughing.
Ruckus
@salvage:
So you are just full of hate for…what’s the word? Vagina!
Lojasmo
@salvage:
You’re right. Your repeated criticism of ABL is tiresome, and banal.
casswriter
‘You know “vagina.” You either have one, or you know someone who has one. You definitely came out of one, and chances are you’re trying to get back inside of one right now.’
Thank you, ABL, for making me laugh out loud at my computer in an empty house.
quannlace
Perhaps they’d prefer ‘Glory Hole.”
And if they’re so intimidated they have to revert to childhood, ‘Hoo-Hah.’
Felanius Kootea
@Patricia Kayden: I think a lot of women are just not paying attention. That’s why Mike Callton’s reaction is good in a way – it gets even more press and makes women wonder why the medically correct term is considered offensive. And what he would prefer to call vaginas as he tries to legislate them.
jl
@quannlace:
‘ Perhaps they’d prefer ‘Glory Hole.” ‘
No, that term would raise some other delicate issues for a lot of these nutcases.
SuzieC
I sent an extremely juvenile email to Callton saying VAGINA! VAGINA! VAGINA!
It may have also called him an asshole.
I hope his computer blows up from many similar incoming emails.
Roger Moore
@salvage:
Your criticism might be easier to take seriously if it were backed up with some specifics, like what about the post you don’t like. Of course you don’t want to provide that because the part you really don’t like is the author.
CW in LA
See, Repubes find words like ‘uterus’ and ‘vagina’ icky.
Now, ‘tight little rent boy butt’, that’s okay.
Ed Dane Defender of Donuts
How about sending them vagina cookies? >>>
theeroticbakery.com/Item.asp?ProxyID=1&ItemID=33&CategoryID=2&Type=1
Along with a note … “Betcha can’t eat just one!”
Joshua Norton
@salvage: Then stay away from Wonkette. What they post would probably outright kill you.
Chauncey1186
I knew Mike Callton when I lived in Nashville. He’s definitely afflicted with “small man syndrome”. Add to that the fact that he’s a chiropractor (translation: couldn’t get into med school) and that should give you a fair assessment of the man. He’s always been ripe for the teabagging influence.
I’ve already left a message on his voicemail naming names of the folks I am mobilizing in Maple Valley to defeat him. He knows them, and he knows me…and he is, no doubt, more than a little concerned.
This should be fun! I’ll keep you all posted.
mainmati
These people are beyond childish. They are fundamentally misogynistic perverts. Our country is seriously imploding in several regions.
Ash Can
@Roger Moore:
I agree. They’re attracting a lot of attention to themselves for their puerile reaction to the word “vagina,” but the overall impression I got from today’s news was that they were just smacking down women who had dared to lip off to them. They’re coming off as complete assholes no matter which way you look at this.
Brian S
@Older_Wiser:
Misogyny was worse fifty years ago. Bad as this is, at least there were women on the floor of the state legislature that they wanted to shut up. 50 years ago, your previous sexual history could be used against you in court if you reported a rape and it went to trial. There are a thousand billion ways in which misogyny was worse fifty years ago than it is now.
None of which is meant to suggest that this isn’t shitty, by the way. It’s horrible, and if Stamas had a Twitter account or an open Facebook page, it would be littered with the word vagina and links to Amanda Palmer’s “Map of Tasmania” video. And if I lived in his district, or anywhere near it, I’d be at his office tomorrow demanding a public apology for this incredibly sexist act.
jl
@mainmati:
” They are fundamentally misogynistic perverts. ”
They are also antidemocratic thugs who use intimidation tactics to deprive citizens and taxpayers of lawful elected representation in state government.
Baron Jrod of Keeblershire
@salvage:
Me too.
rikyrah
get out of my VAGINA and get your probes out of it too.
they kill me with that nonsense.
danielx
Well, we certainly wouldn’t want to cause any pearl clutching and/or fainting through the use of medically correct terminology. Perhaps Rep. Callton (R-asshole) would be more receptive if any of the colloquial terms for the female reproductive organ(s) were used instead.
IrishCC
Oh thank you ABL! You made me laugh out loud you subversive prankster! Off to my fax machine!
Dick Move
I have a few friends who are active in labor union leadership here in MI, and who attended some of the hearings on labor negotiations last year (when the legislature was deciding how best to screw anyone whose livelihood depends in part on state funding). I’m told the Democrats were routinely shouted down by the Republicans during debate. The majority here is impatient. They see where national politics is heading, and they want to get there first. In the old days, they had to at least pretend that their ends and means were fundamentally democratic. Now, they’re just tired of faking it, and they don’t see why they should have to. Who’s going to make them? They’re the wave of the future!
brantl
@clean willie: Eat Me!
brantl
@Jake Nelson: Oh,for Christ’s sake, get a grip.
Odie Hugh Manatee
@salvage:
That really says something about you. Let me guess, you touch stove burners to see if they are hot, right?
brantl
@salvage:
Funny, I hate that, too.
salvage
@Roger Moore: It’s cringe inducing in its ham-fisted, shrill rambling. It lacks wit, subtly and grace. It’s pedestrian, unfocused and has a SNL reference that was hack three summers after the episode.
I agree with everything she says, no quarrel there but she is an awful blogger and I feel she detracts from a blog I otherwise very much enjoy.
Yeah, I should probably not say anything if I can’t be nice but one of the things I like about the blogosphere, particularly the left is that criticism can be taken.
Nothing personal against ABL, I’m not insulting her I just don’t think she’s good at this particular thing she is trying to do. I’m not even saying she should stop or be stopped, I’m saying she should be better, just my opinion and facts as I see them.
But I’m sure I’m about to get flamed the same way I do when I suggest that Obama should stop blowing up civilians because some guy told the CIA that terrorists really like weddings and funerals.
Interrobang
A bunch of people should show up at the statehouse wearing big sombreros and shaking maracas and singing
Vagina, vagina, vagina
A twat, a twat, a twat
Vagina, vagina, vagina
A twat, a twat, a twat
Hoohah vagina pudenda
Pudenda vagina a twat
We said hoohah vagina pudenda
Pudenda vagina a twat!
I’m sure the Juicers’ vivid imaginations can fill in the requisite tune.
different-church-lady
@Joshua Norton: You say that like it’s a bad thing.
MattMinus
@salvage:
You pretty much nailed it. She is badly in need of an editor.
Mnemosyne
@salvage:
You have a very strange idea of what “constructive criticism” means. Saying that someone’s work is shit and she should give up is not exactly a useful critique that someone can use.
fuckwit
Hahaha, Lebowski
youtube.com/watch?v=TmDwG9z7EXM
The word makes some men uncomfortable… VAGINA!
fuckwit
The whole neighborhood can hear your cussin’!
youtube.com/watch?v=IjHLNdWiHl4
salvage
@Joshua Norton: No, I’m a huge fan of Wonkette. Fantastic stuff.
salvage
@Mnemosyne:
Uh, re-read what I wrote, I don’t think you saw this bit:
I’m not even saying she should stop or be stopped, I’m saying she should be better, just my opinion and facts as I see them.
Clean Willie
Well, I’ll be damned! ABL’s fans are every bit as witty and articulate as she is.
Tata
@salvage:
In any roomful of talking men, this exact criticism will always, always, always be leveled at a woman who speaks up.
Clean Willie
@Tata:
^fixed
No One of Consequence
Why is this angry black lady always going on about her coochie?
Yes, we are all very proud that you are very proud. (/snark)
Unbelievable. How the hell do we get these elected leaders?! Fucking children…
ABL and other Juicers of open mindedness, I have been listening to the promotional music tracks provided by SWSX 2012, and ran across a song you should listen to, because it is fitting for this piece:
8 Miles Wide by Storm Large.
Peace ABL, and all my brothers and sisters, regardless of genitalia.
– NOoC
salvage
@Tata:
Seriously? GFY.
ABL’s genitalia has nothing to do with her being a lousy blogger, I listed reasons why she sucks and nothing to do with her ability to birth children, produce milk or inability to pee standing up.
But I guess it’s easier to accuse me of sexism than to give what I actually said any thought.
I’ve said it before, wingnuts on all sides.
J R in WV
@salvage:
How so, awful? Give me some examples of things that make it awful!
‘Cause I am thinking the Republican monsters in Michigan are what is awful, and you are standing beside them.
Ruckus
@J R in WV:
Behind. Behind, not beside.
JoeShabadoo
Thank you for putting a huge fanged vagina on the front page so it is completely unavoidable when I read balloon juice at work.
dan
@Chauncey1186:
I imagine you know a lot about “teabagging” with all the nuts that get dipped in your mouth.
Karstin
@Ash Can: This sounds about right. They’re not offended, they’re boggy little opportunists looking for any way at all to shut down an articulate political adversary, and the fact she’s a woman is just gravy. What’s frightening about it for me is that their own constituents aren’t screaming bloody murder. If I had voted for Brown I’d be infuriated with this blatant attack on my voice in the political process.
alicia q
I think most of you are missing the point. It’s in the context. There are more tactful ways to say some things.