Paul Constant, at Seattle’s Stranger, on the latest outrage-against-bigotry:
Last night, Oreo published a photo of a rainbow Oreo on their Facebook wall to celebrate gay pride. Even though the cream filling in Oreos is basically just Crisco mixed up with some corn syrup, the rainbow Oreo sure did look delicious. Who could hate a delicious rainbow Oreo?
Lots of assholes, turns out. Buzzfeed has created a compilation post of Facebook bigots who are now calling for boycotts of Oreo for their support of pride. It’s an incredibly depressing post which you should only visit if you are currently secure in your happiness. If you like to laugh at ignorant jackasses, though, it’s a treasure trove. And it’s getting easier to laugh at schmucks like this, now that history is leaning toward acceptance of gay marriage. These assholes are looking more and more like objects in the rear view mirror; their hate seems bigger than it really is, but it’ll be a memory soon enough…
Of course, this further cements my old-person suspicion that Facebook = Grief. Or maybe I should be fauxtraged that Nabisco is trying to get some of that Girl Scout cookie anti-bigotry buying bump. But seriously, bigots: Right now I wanna go out and buy a big sackful of Oreos, and I don’t even like Oreos!
***********
Apart from the neverending Battle Against Bigotry, what’s on the agenda for the evening?
PeakVT
If enough companies endorse marriage equality or evolution or something, conservatives will end up starving themselves.
Linnaeus
What’s on the agenda?
Writing, some sauvignon blanc, and garlic chicken.
quannlace
How dare teh gays try to redefine snack cookies. Oreos are in the Bible!
Baud
@Linnaeus:
What? No Oreos?
Linnaeus
@Baud:
No, though I think I will go get some in the next day or so.
Oreos are an American icon. If you boycott them, you hate freedom and you’re with the terrorists.
Baud
@Linnaeus:
Exactly. We should start calling them Freedom Cookies.
cathyx
As many people who will boycott it will buy the rainbow ones who don’t normally buy them. So it’s a wash.
beltane
I think we’ve found a way to influence wingnut behavior: stick a rainbow on something and they’ll stay away for fear of catching teh ghey. How about rainbow painted polling places?
Just Some Fuckhead
OMFG I’ve been feeding my kids gay cookies.
RedKitten
I like this take on it.
lamh35
OMG! RIP NORA EPHRON!!! Man she wrote 3 of my favorite Rom-Com and regular movies ever. Sleepless in Seattle, Julie and Julia, When Harry Met Sally,
http://insidemovies.ew.com/2012/06/26/nora-ephron-dies-at-71/
beltane
What about Pop Tarts, is Jesus cool with them?
BGinCHI
So Obama is an oreo because he’s black on the outside and white on the inside. And now he’s gay because oreos are gay.
I admire the logic, actually.
Mike in NC
Merely this year’s version of Malkin’s moronic “Great Pastry Jihad”?
El Cid
The idiot brigades got all het’up as well when they found out that Campbell’s soup in Canada offers a few products which uphold halal requirements.
Soup. In Canada. Only if you look for and buy the halal soup versions.
And This Was Too Much for them. What? A soup company offering (in another country, no less) those people who want to buy certain products which are the Muslim analogue to kosher food rules?
My god. You might as well blow up the Washington Monument and build Kaaba II, because once anyone anywhere can buy a can of Campbell’s soup which is all Muslimicided, you might as well just give up and enjoy Shari’a law and going straight to hell.
gogol's wife
Proud to say I had some peanut-butter Oreos for dessert.
jayjaybear
From George Takei’s Facebook:
Not surprised that fundies don’t like the rainbow oreo. They didn’t like blacks and whites touching, either.
Alison
@lamh35: I was sad to hear this, as Sleepless in Seattle and You’ve Got Mail are two of my main movie guilty pleasures, though the former is less “guilty” as I think it’s really a great flick.
Also loved Julie and Julia so much, more than I thought I would. RIP to her.
Origuy
@cathyx: Except that the picture is not of a real cookie, at least not one that they sell. It’s a picture of six different colored fillings arranged like a rainbow, between the two chocolate Oreo cookies.
Alison
Also, on the Oreo thing, these people are just fucking pathetic. And how long do you think any of these “boycotts” will last? What, a couple weeks maybe? Then who gives a shit anymore, because no one will know if they buy them and no one will remember the whole stupid dust-up anyway. So they can piss and whine and make grand statements of NO MOAR OREOS EVAR and then go back to chowing down on them and spraying black crumbs across their Don’t Tread On me t-shirts while they shout agreement with Rush’s latest diatribe against Eric Holder or what the fuck ever.
Fuck ’em.
ExurbanMom
My favorite comment went something like this: Let’s get all the prepared food companies to support gay rights. Then all the bigots would starve to death.
celticdragonchick
Rod “crunchy constipated” Dreher is having a massive case of butthurt on this.
http://www.theamericanconservative.com/dreher/your-big-fat-gay-oreo-cookie/
Waaaay the fuck out there and gone Catholic wingnut Erin Manning goes one step further:
Because GLBT friendly companies love them some child rapists at NAMBLA, of course. I guess that it is good for Erin to talk about this, however. It distracts her from weeping when evil Protestants use birth control.
cthulhu
Maybe they should rethink organizing their boycott from Facebook as well:
http://techcrunch.com/2012/06/25/tech-gay-pride/
What morans!
MD Rackham
I’m not surprised that Oreos turn out to be gay liberal socialist muslim cookies.
After all, they were just a knockoff of Hydrox, first baked by Jesus himself in 1908. Now there was a manly cookie that could stay hard even after being dunked in cold milk.
PurpleGirl
@RedKitten: Agreed. George Takei is so kewl.
RedKitten
I just think that the fundies/wingnuts have no idea how flat-out STUPID they look. Seriously. Cookies? Soup? Rachael Ray’s scarf? Ellen Degeneres? Nobody takes these mouth-breathers seriously, and the more they froth about silly, harmless things, the more credibility they lose…and that’s okay with me!
beltane
@celticdragonchick: It’s worse than I thought. Nabisco not only appreciates their gay customers, they are going so far as to engage in a Big Brother style reeducation campaign to force people into adopting “politically correct sex practices.”
Nabisco is clearly worse than Pol Pot. Even the golden Oreos are a threat.
RedKitten
But…but…but…free market capitalism! Invisible hand! Corporations are people!
Funny how corporations are the wonderful, magical benevolent job creator angels…until they embrace a group that the wingnuts hate.
BGinCHI
Oreos are not people my friend.
General Stuck
Forget about the head to head polling at this point. If Romney doesn’t lift that “likeable” number, he is toast. All else being equal with the plan for economy numbers. And it would be sweet justice if all the big money negative campaigning from CU cash, backfires when voters dislike him more from that. It is hard to negative campaign against an incumbent, unless you stick to meta facts, and not get into the personal. Voters already have made up their minds on that from the previous 4 years watching Obama.
russell
f**k’em. no oreos for them.
scav
Oh I so want rainbow colored communion wafers now.
Roger Moore
@General Stuck:
64% of people think Romney is likeable? I guess that means at least 37% of the population has not been paying attention.
beltane
@General Stuck: Romney can’t lift his likability numbers except possibly by hiding in a cave for the next few months. The more people see of him, the less likable he becomes.
Elizabelle
She pulled it off!
Gloria Bromell Tinubu swamped her Blue Dog opponent in winning the SC Democratic primary for 7th District congressional seat. (Coastal northern South Carolina and surrounding area; Myrtle Beach, etc.)
This on the same day Teresa Sullivan was re-instated as president of the University of Virginia.
You go grrrls!
Baud
@Elizabelle:
Great news. What are her chances in the general?
waynski
“Hey lady, thanks for the ride…” A big THIS to anyone who gets this horror movie reference first.
KrisWV
Don’t like oreos and want to buy some? Here’s what you do:
1) Split open the oreo and scrape the filling off with a knife. Put the excess filling in a bowl. Repeat for the whole darn bag.
2) Whip up some heavy cream until stiff. No need to add sugar. A dash of vanilla is ok.
3) Put whipped cream on the oreo chocolate half and stand it up on a plate. Do it again and put that cookie half up against the previous one. Keep it up until you have a long row of whipped cream covered oreos on the plate, then go back and add a second row right next to the first one. Use all the oreos!
4) Put you oreos and whipped cream “log” into the refrigerator overnight covered in saran wrap or wax paper to keep fridge smells at bay.
5) Discard the original excess oreo filling that you put in a bowl. Possibly in a biohazard container.
6) Next day eat your cake. It’s called “Redneck Zebra Delight”
and
you
will
love
it
General Stuck
@beltane:
Yup, I don’t see a miss congeniality award in Romney’s pre election future.
Fluke bucket
@RedKitten: That is magnificent! Thank you.
SiubhanDuinne
@scav:
OMG that would be so festive!!
Maude
@General Stuck:
With the economy the way it is, people may start resenting the big money donations to Romney. They may also not like the fact that Romney is getting the Wall Street money.
Gus
@Roger Moore: Huh? Check your math.
Gus
Oh, and there is a boycott of General Mills for taking a stand against a proposed anti-gay marriage amendment on the ballot this fall in MN.
Ben Cisco
@beltane: There was a bin Laden joke dying to be told here, but the truth about where he was “hiding” spoiled it. Dammit.
mtraven
@celticdragonchick:
I think “vicious little hate biscuit” just became Dreher’s new nom-de-internet.
r€nato
well, if ya ask me, complaining about someone taking away from you the white, creamy stuff you can’t get enough of… sounds kinda gay.
Lyrebird
@KrisWV: let me fix this:
Actually not really, bc I was such a hard-core sugar junkie in my youth that I gotta keep away from the stuff for my sanity, but yeah I was the kid who would scrape out the middles, eat the cookies bc it would be a shame to waste food, and then eat the goop.
Thanks for the recipe, tho, I think I could make a low-sugar gluten-free coconut-milk version which no one would want on the Recipe Round-Up but might be fun for me to eat!
Mike in NC
@Baud:
I’d venture to say slim. There were about 4 Democrats and 32 Republicans running in primaries for the new SC 7th Congressional District, reflecting the area’s extreme diversity. Former wingnut Lt. Gov. Andre Bauer might have the edge, even though he’s not even a local. His extremism is quite popular with the teabaggers.
MobiusKlein
apparently Progressive insurance is a no-no for Conservatives now: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150915623904422&set=p.10150915623904422&type=1&theater
Apparently they contribute to the wrong people, hang with Soros.
Citizen_X
@celticdragonchick:
Whoa, whoa, hey! That last one is part of the GOP platform, innit?
Mark S.
The BCS is dead (in two years). A collection of wise men will select the four best teams in the country to decide the national champion. I’m sure there will never be any controversy in college football again.
But hey, it’s a billion times better than the current system.
Mark S.
@Mark S.:
Oh, here’s a link to that.
Citizen_X
Oh, and speaking of oreos (heh heh), this is the vilest thing I’ve seen today: Ken Blackwell (remember him?) and Herman Cain teaming up to “defend voting rights.” Given that they’re Republicans, it means the exact opposite, of course. (Like I said, remember Ken Blackwell?) They’re bitching about Holder not pursuing those terrifying New Black Panthers, and also could he please stop bugging Rick Scott about throwing thousands of people off the voter rolls?
They have the gall to wrap this voter-suppression plea in the civil rights movement. Denying thousands of poor, old, and young people the right to vote: that’s what MLK would have wanted!
artem1s
@MobiusKlein:
Peter B Lewis hasn’t been the CEO or chair of Progressive for ages. Probably still a major holder but may not even be on the board anymore. Kinda missed the boat, didn’t they? Boycotting Progressive probably wouldn’t even register with Peter even if they could pull it off. Seeing that Progressive sells insurance largely to high risk drivers at relatively affordable prices, a good portion of their clients may not have a choice to boycott. shitwits
artem1s
@Citizen_X:
crap not Ken Blackwell, who let him out from under his rock? hate that guy but yea, he and Cain are soul mates from hell.
Gopher2b
Since most redneck bigots are super fat (go to the fair), I’m thinking this is the most sinister/genius anti-obsetity program yet.
Bubblegum Tate
@celticdragonchick:
And that is NOT AT ALL A HYPERBOLIC DESCRIPTION of what happens when a corporate brand decides to endorse equality. It’s BRAINWASHING!
Jay in Oregon
@celticdragonchick:
Erin Manning:
When the hell did it become the job of some megalomaniacal soulless corporate sack of nothing to convince me that my morals are socially incorrect
The day Erin Manning and the Catholic bishops decided that health insurance companies should play the role of moral scolds to those dirty sluts who need birth control.
(I typed the above sentence without bothering to check if I was right about Manning, then I decided that I should do some minimal due diligence. A direct quote: “I think pornography (for example) is intrinsically evil like birth control.” OK, then!)
SiubhanDuinne
Am I the only person here who has never once thought of finding out if Oreo had a Facebook page? I mean do people DO that?– eat something and think, Gosh, this is tasty! I sure wish I could like them on Facebook! Doesn’t that strike you as a bit … strange?
That said, the rainbow stuf is great.
Jay in Oregon
@SiubhanDuinne:
Facebook is like the AOL of the 21st Century.
I remember when TV and print ads posted their AOL keywords in addition to (or instead of) their web URL.
The “like us on Facebook” thing is even more obnoxious since each “like” spawns what is essentially a micro-ad for the product or service on your timeline.
tkogrumpy
I don’t believe Kraft foods is going to break out in a sweat about the bigotry. I just checked the page and that rainbow post has 203,000 likes, an absurdly high number for a single facebook post.
Nellcote
why do goopers hate cookies? First it was Girl Scout cookies, they Rmoney turned up his nose at a plate of nice bakery cookies on offer at a meet the folks event, now it Oreos. WTF?
Sophist(from droid)
@MD Rackham: So if Oreos are gay and Hydrox are totally straight, yo, then what about those Newman’s Own Oreo knockoffs? Bi?
The Red Pen
The DOD is celebrating Gay Pride month. I wonder if we should boycott THAT, too.
Jinchi
This comment:
is particularly ironic, since it seems to imply racial harmony through anti-gay bigotry.