Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

It looks like winning debates is a black job!

This isn’t Democrats spending madly. This is government catching up.

It’s not hopeless, and we’re not helpless.

A lot of Dems talk about what the media tells them to talk about. Not helpful.

Technically true, but collectively nonsense

Never give a known liar the benefit of the doubt.

I’m sure you banged some questionable people yourself. We’re allowed to grow past that.

Compromise? There is no middle ground between a firefighter and an arsonist.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

Fuck these fucking interesting times.

At some point, the ability to learn is a factor of character, not IQ.

Can we lighten up on the doomsday scenarios?

How can republicans represent us when they don’t trust women?

There is no right way to do the wrong thing.

FFS people, this was a good thing. take the win.

Peak wingnut was a lie.

Balloon Juice has never been a refuge for the linguistically delicate.

Not so fun when the rabbit gets the gun, is it?

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

Hot air and ill-informed banter

Come on, media. you have one job. start doing it.

There is no compromise when it comes to body autonomy. You either have it or you don’t.

“What are Republicans afraid of?” Everything.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / That Explains That

That Explains That

by | 93 Comments

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I was wondering what happened to DougJ as he unexpectedly dropped off the radar, but I guess this clears things up:

A man spotted dressed in a goat suit among a herd of wild goats in the mountains of northern Utah has wildlife officials worried he could be in danger as hunting season approaches.

Phil Douglass of the Utah Division of Wildlife Resources said Friday the person is doing nothing illegal, but he worries the so-called “goat man” is unaware of the dangers.

“My very first concern is the person doesn’t understand the risks,” Douglass said. “Who’s to say what could happen.”

Douglass said a man hiking Sunday along Ben Lomond peak in the mountains above Ogden, about 40 miles north of Salt Lake City, spotted the person dressed like a goat among a herd of real goats. The person provided some blurry photographs to Douglass, who said they did not appear to have been altered.

Insert your own Kaus joke here.

Reader Interactions

93Comments

  14. 14.

    Omnes Omnibus

    Does anyone know Mickey Kaus’s whereabouts? I worry for DougJ’s virtue more than his safety in this situation.

  16. 16.

    Spaghetti Lee

    Man, goats are dumb. If a goat tried to live among people by wearing a human suit, I’m almost positive I’d be able to spot it.

  17. 17.

    NotMax

    Trivia tidbit: Goat is the most widely-consumed meat on the planet.

    Perhaps the fellow in the article woefully misheard the lyrics of the classic advertising jingle as

       See the U.S.A.
       Have a chèvre lay…

  21. 21.

    feebog

    @ Spaghettu Lee:

    Man, goats are dumb. If a goat tried to live among people by wearing a human suit, I’m almost positive I’d be able to spot it.

    Only if it was a three piece in navy pinstripe.

  22. 22.

    NotMax

    @Raven

    Classy ride.

    The bench seats back then could be mighty uncomfortable though, especially for anyone a little shorter or a little taller than the average.

  23. 23.

    Raven

    @NotMax: I redid mine with new covers and padding. My buddy had a 63 with a four speed and we drove with three people from San Fran to Tucson to Champaign. Lenny the dog rode in the front a good bit of the time too. Nothin but an am radio and a big fat lid.

    Hey pretty baby don’t you know it ain’t my fault
    I love to hear the steel belts hummin’ on the asphalt
    Wake up in the middle of the night in a truck stop
    Stumble in the restaurant wonderin’ why I don’t stop

    Gotta keep rockin’ why I still can
    I gotta two pack habit and a motel tan
    But when my boots hit the boards I’m a brand new man
    With my back to the riser I make my stand
    And hey pretty baby won’t you hold me tight
    We’re loadin’ up and rollin’ out of here tonight
    One of these days I’m gonna settle down
    And take you back with me to the Guitar Town

  26. 26.

    farmette

    Who the hell shoots goats! Maybe he is observing the goat’s behavior. I hope so. Isn’t that more normal then blasting grazing animals?

  28. 28.

    GG

    @Spaghetti Lee: Damn right goats are stupid, and annoying. And destructive. But you’ve got goats, and then you’ve got teabaggers. At least goats are tasty eating, and the cheese is great.

  34. 34.

    NotMax

    Not at all uncommon here to drive through certain neighborhoods during daytime on any given weekend and see someone standing standing in his driveway over a goat carcass, wielding a blowtorch to burn off the hair prior to cooking it for a family gathering.

  37. 37.

    eemom

    Knowing — and sharing — DougJ’s penchant for classic musicals, I feel certain he would want the soundtrack to be this.

  38. 38.

    Liberty60

    Nobody has a good Erick bin Erick/ Justice Souter reference?

    You guys are slipping.

  42. 42.

    cbear

    @Yutsano:

    Yuts,
    I can imagine the conversation between Mitt and the Bain bookkeeper:

    “Look, Alvin, you four-eyed bastard, you better get yourself good and gone before they show up with the papers–remember what I did to that fucking dog.”

  44. 44.

    NotMax

    @Jager

    Boy, could some of those V-8 suckers fishtail if one wasn’t vigilant.

    Even with the V-8, still enough space in the engine compartment to crawl inside to work on it. Those were the days.

  52. 52.

    Anne Laurie

    I was wondering what happened to DougJ as he unexpectedly dropped off the radar…

    Cole, I guess it’s… reassuring… to know you don’t read the other FP’s posts either!

    (And to think some readers still believe we’re all figments of your imagination.)

  54. 54.

    Jager

    @NotMax:
    My life long pal Bill’s Dad was an engineer for a construction company, he drove a short bed late 50’s Dodge with a hemi….talk about fish tail! Bill wore the back tires off it within a month of getting his license. Lord-a-Mercy!

  58. 58.

    JGabriel

    Either I’m tired, or the goat joke genre is completely wrung out, because I can’t think of anything original or funny to say about a goat-man running around in Utah.

    Which is kind of sad if you think about it.

    I mean, here’s this man, in Utah, plausibly a Mormon, cavorting about in a goat suit, maybe he thinks the goats don’t know about the church’s abandonment of polygamy yet, which is probably taking the horny goat motif just a step too far, and I can’t think of damn thing to say about it that hasn’t already been done.

    Makes me feel old, goddammit.

    .

  62. 62.

    MikeJ

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Tom Levenson is a remarkably elaborate trolling operation. I mean, if DougJ went to all the trouble of writing the books and all…

    Oh, there is *a* Tom Levenson at MIT who wrote some books, but there’s no proof that *our* Tom Levenson isn’t DougJ.

  69. 69.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Poopyman: I would say “No, they don’t,” but then people would ask me how I know. The answer, of course, is rugby.

  70. 70.

    Anne Laurie

    @a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q):

    Or, is it, AL, that you’re all aliases of DougJ?

    Well, a bunch of commentors have met DougJ. Cole, on the other hand, rejects all attempts at a meet-up.

    But then again, what’s DougJ get out of pretending to be an African-American feminist activist based in LA, and what is the real Imani Gandy going to do when she finds out about it?

  72. 72.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Anne Laurie:

    But then again, what’s DougJ get out of pretending to be an African-American feminist activist based in LA, and what is the real Imani Gandy going to do when she finds out about it?

    Answer to the first part: I don’t judge.

    Answer to the second part: Cut him, obviously.

  73. 73.

    MikeJ

    WTF WP? Three different comments down the hole, no error message, no post, no nothing. Just gone.

  76. 76.

    danielx

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Yes indeed. I thought BJ front pagers had better taste than to engage in bestiality. I’m referring to Kaus, not those poor innocent goats.

  80. 80.

    MikeJ

    OK, I have a guess. My previous comments were about how at the last Seattle meetup I was both DougJ and a troll with the initial UCT. Perhaps spelling that out triggered the problem.

  85. 85.

    BigD

    Being a part of America’s elite community of mathematics-teachers is surely a stressful job and a way this particular community of education-professionals has, through the centuries, learned to keep an ‘even keel’ while travelling among the general population of workers is through a mechanism called the ‘sabbatical’.

    Sabbaticals, or a ceasing, give thinkers a breather to walk among the general population of workers, reflect upon their intellectual achievements, and explore the wonders of Mother Nature. Here is to hoping that DougJ comes back refreshed, and better than ever.

  86. 86.

    Yutsano

    @MikeJ: Speaking of meet-ups:

    A: BGinCHI is coming to town in August. We’ll need to start planning here soon although he hasn’t given me a firm date yet.

    B: I need another challah loaf from you good sir. The last one you gave me was fantastic and the remainder will be consumed tomorrow. I’ll pay this time. Gotta use all this overtime dough for something. :)

    (And if he RSVPs again I’m gonna laugh myself silly!)

  88. 88.

    Yutsano

    @MikeJ: I’ll get on him since gwangung is such a busy kid. Let’s go ahead and pick location though: Ivar’s Salmon House?

  89. 89.

    MikeJ

    @Yutsano: If we’re doing dinner that’s good. It can be a pain to get to for out of towners, unless they come by boat.

    I’ve always sort of suggested a drinks place mainly so people who wanted to spend a bit less would still feel welcome, but I’m up for anything.

    Will we need to make rezzies?[1] Can we meet in the bar area and sort of colonize tables as needed?

    [1] For table service dinner, no doubt.

  90. 90.

    Yutsano

    @MikeJ: The bar area is a good option, especially since we tend to be less than quiet sorts. :) And the Happy Hour runs from 3-close. We MIGHT not be able to reserve in there however I’ll get more details when we have a firm date established. All I know for sure is mid-August and they’re visiting her parents. And of course I haven’t seen him all night. Fuckhead. :)

  91. 91.

    LosGatosCA

    I saw that picture of the goat guy. Pretty sure he’s Mormon because there was a license plate frame on his ass and it said ‘My other wives are human.’

  92. 92.

    FNWA

    I started reading this blog when Cole was still a Republican and was genuinely trying to engage his readers to come to a consensus on the Valerie Plame affair. My long term lurker bona fides having been established, that’s the funniest thing that Cole has ever written.

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