Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

And we’re all out of bubblegum.

T R E 4 5 O N

The words do not have to be perfect.

My years-long effort to drive family and friends away has really paid off this year.

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

Jack be nimble, jack be quick, hurry up and indict this prick.

American History and Black History Cannot Be Separated

Republicans seem to think life begins at the candlelight dinner the night before.

Motto for the House: Flip 5 and lose none.

You can’t attract Republican voters. You can only out organize them.

It’s time for the GOP to dust off that post-2012 autopsy, completely ignore it, and light the party on fire again.

DeSantis transforms Florida into 1930s Germany with gators and theme parks.

Republicans do not pay their debts.

“Jesus paying for the sins of everyone is an insult to those who paid for their own sins.”

When do we start airlifting the women and children out of Texas?

The GOP couldn’t organize an orgy in a whorehouse with a fist full of 50s.

Accused of treason; bitches about the ratings. I am in awe.

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

No Justins, No Peace

Wow, you are pre-disappointed. How surprising.

Come on, man.

Glad to see john eastman going through some things.

Come on, media. you have one job. start doing it.

They love authoritarianism, but only when they get to be the authoritarians.

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Late Night Open Thread

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I think I just broke two toes when I opened the freezer to get ice cubes for a Pellegrino and lemon, and a 4 lb frozen pork loin center cut fell out and landed square on my foot. I’ve got my foot in an ice bath now, and if things get worse, it looks like I have a day at the ER tomorrow.

Never a fucking dull moment.

Reader Interactions

137Comments

  2. 2.

    Poopyman

    Stuff like this is what makes working in the ER so entertaining.

    I couldn’t do it, but a friend of mine loved it – and had a huge backlog of stories, too.

    Also too, this never would have happened if you were a vegetarian.

  4. 4.

    Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)

    I just got back from The Dark Knight Rises. It was sufficiently awesome that I am prepared to forgive it its numerous complete idiocies. Not only is the science actually worse than in the last one, I hate to break it to the writers, but if gunfire breaks out on a major stock exchange, all trading is going to be halted. If it happens on expirations day, all of those options will be kept open until there is a chance to have trading under normal conditions. You can’t invade the Gotham City Exchange in order to place a bunch of fake trades in order to ensure that Bruce Wayne is bankrupt that same night.

    And the only thing fingerprints are used for in the finance industry is for the background check you have to pass before you can work in it.

  6. 6.

    Arclite

    2 things:

    1. Now your toes will look like your fingers.

    2. If you were a vegetarian you wouldn’t have this problem. Karma?

    Edit: poopyman beat me to it.

  7. 7.

    Poopyman

    @Omnes Omnibus: Yeah, I was going to say something to that effect as well. If they’re not in need of setting I doubt they’ll be able to do much. I’ve broken a toe or two or three, and just left them to heal on their own.

  10. 10.

    freelancer

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN):

    I loved it. I saw all three movies in a marathon that went from 6pm to like 3 am. The third movie isn’t as good as the second, but as part of a trilogy, it is Amazing. Even though some of the character details were leaked, the quality of the writing and storytelling was just awesome.

    @John Cole:

    But were you nekkid?

  11. 11.

    Rafer Janders

    I think I just broke two toes when I opened the freezer to get ice cubes for a Pellegrino and lemon,

    When you retell this story in years to come — and you will — you may want to butch it up a bit by turning the Pellegrino and lemon into a scotch and soda.

  12. 12.

    Citizen_X

    Come on, John: if weren’t for your toes cushioning the fall, you would have bruised the pork loin.

    Let’s have some priorities here, for Pete’s sake!

  13. 13.

    handy

    Sounds like one possibly under-appreciated cat in the Cole manor decided to get that voodoo again on his master.

  14. 14.

    MikeJ

    I’ve never seen any of the BAtman movies, since I’m not really into the whole underwear pervert[1] thing. The second one is on the teevee now, and I just can’t get over how much the joker sounds like Richard Nixon.

    [1] Marvel/DC underwear perverts that is. AML, I hope you know I’m still impressed.

  17. 17.

    LesGS

    Well, it’s not falling-whilst-naked-mopping, and certainly not shattering-a-shoulder-whilst-preventing-Lily-from-getting-cold-tootsies, but pork-loin-toe-crushage-during-the-quest-for-iced-Pellegrino-and-lemon will no doubt prove a significant chapter in the John Cole legend.

    E.T.A. I once broke a toe jumping into a pool to save a drowning dog. There is much more to this story, but I thought pretty much any dog would figure out how to swim after thrashing around a bit. This one sank like a stone. And no, I had nothing to do with the dog being in the pool in the first place.

  18. 18.

    El Cid

    It’s only ’cause Obamacare that you expect the gubmit to pay all your medical bills.

    If there was still some FREEDOM in this country, you would have watched for falling frozen meats when opening the fridge.

  19. 19.

    JadeJord

    Wake up and smell the coffee. John Cole is an ER frequent flyer injuring himself to get pain meds. Tunch, Lily, and Rosie are gong to have to stage an intervention.

  21. 21.

    The Dangerman

    I think I have to call BS on accidents not happening if he was a Vegetarian; for example, he could have dropped a pumpkin on his toe just the same. And, as Animal House and Otter so aptly pointed out, cucumbers could possibly be dangerous if improperly clothed.

  23. 23.

    Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)

    I take it back. I just realized that there is a very serious plot hole in the Batman movie and it is of a type that I don’t forgive. However, I can’t say what it is because it would be a pretty big spoiler.

  25. 25.

    VividBlueDotty

    Broken toes are the WORST. Incredibly painful and not much they can do for them. I’ve had a few, and the only one that was ever casted was a break right where the toe connects to the foot. A boot or wooden shoe can help stabilize while you heal – maybe worth looking into, but I hope you don’t have to spend most of a night in the ER to find out. Is there an Urgent Care center you could go to tomorrow?

    @LesGS: My doggie sinks like a stone too.

  27. 27.

    Pete Mack

    As I remember, the emergency room will make you wait for hours and then say: yep, they are broken; keep them taped to their neighbors.”
    Then they will give you some Advil and send you home.

  28. 28.

    Carnacki

    @Rafer Janders: I tore a shoulder muscle near my rotator cuff pushing the kids on the merry-go-round at the playground. A buddy laughed as I told him about it and said from then on I had to tell people I did it in a bar fight

  30. 30.

    Joseph Nobles

    Quick, throw the pork loin into the oven and serve it to the police when they arrive. Perfect crime!

  32. 32.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Carnacki: When people used ask me how my ex and I met, I sometimes told them that I won her in a poker game in Mombasa. FWIW she found the story amusing.

  34. 34.

    handy

    @handy:

    But seriously. Nolan bringing Aaron Eckhart back as Harvey Dent’s long lost brother–such a crutch and contrived tripe.

  35. 35.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Carnacki: When people used ask me how my ex and I met, I sometimes told them that I won her in a card game in Mombasa. FWIW she found the story amusing.

    FYWP.

  38. 38.

    Yutsano

    @MikeJ: I fear this line of questioning can only end in tears. Or howls of laughter. I’m fine with either.

  41. 41.

    Mary G

    Poor guy. Keep it iced and elevated, too. You are living proof that most accidents happen close to or at home. Maybe you could move and not leave a forwarding address.

  47. 47.

    Jane2

    Jeebus, John. With your luck, you could claim buying a new fridge with the freezer at the bottom as a preventative health measure.

  50. 50.

    RadioOne

    As someone who has broken quite a few bones in my lifetime, if you’re not in enough pain to immediately go to the ER, you probably haven’t broken a bone.

    I just finished Season 1 of Treme. Watching the promos a few years back, I mostly expected the John Goodman character to be basically the “color commentator” for most of the post-Katrina aftermath in New Orleans. I was really surprised by his decision at the end of Season 1.

  56. 56.

    dance around in your bones

    Old John Cole was a merry old soul
    And a merry old soul was he….
    And he called for his pipe and he called for his bowl
    And got a pork loin on his toe

  57. 57.

    burnspbesq

    Dude, with your history, shouldn’t you be wearing steel-toed shoes at all times?

    The people of Cole’s hometown should be glad that we don’t have community rating for health insurance. They just dodged yet another premium increase.

  59. 59.

    Suffern ACE

    Greetings from lovely Ghent, where it is a cool 48 degrees, and the folks are just turning into bed after dancing at the canal late into the night.

  63. 63.

    David Koch

    This is my fault. Yesterday I told Cole to break a leg. I didn’t think he would take me literally.

  65. 65.

    Soonergrunt

    Well, the kids stayed an extra week with the grand parents and now their flight is delayed. They were half an hour late pushing out of San Diego, and got diverted from Phoenix to Tucson because of weather. Then they finally went to Phoenix, and should be on the way to OKC as I write this, three hours behind schedule.
    I’m just waiting for the phone call that says they’ve arrived safely at the Airport. I didn’t get one with updated flight information so I don’t know what flight they’re on.

  67. 67.

    David Koch

    Batman raked in $77 million on friday and is projected to take in $190 million for the weekend. It’s mowing down the competition.

  69. 69.

    Suffern ACE

    @Soonergrunt: Well since you don’t know what flight, have you thought of using this as an opportunity to shrink the number of dependents in the house? The airline lost em. The airline can take care of em for awhile.

  70. 70.

    Jewish Steel

    God loves fools and children, Cole. Take it as proof of your innate intelligence that Himself averts His eyes when calamity draws near.

  77. 77.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN):

    I can suspend disbelief. Yeah, I noticed them, but they didn’t do much to ruin it for me.

    What did bother me was that the Nolan brothers telegraphed the major plot twist. I sat through the majority of the film just waiting for the reveal, and knew with almost absolute certainty that it was coming a few minutes before it did.

    Overall, it was an acceptable film, mainly because my kid bought the tickets. Easily the weakest of the three, however.

  79. 79.

    El Cid

    ACT III Scene V

    NEIGHBOR, in kitchen, after John Cole had been injured by the falling pork loin. Light falls upon the refrigerator, and neighbor stands facing it, away from audience. Audience cannot see neighbor’s face.

    For every day hath his highness suff’rd
    The wrath of pork alone. Anon!
    Though swine of chill’ed box
    Abuse the hapless fall on high
    Twixt shelf and toe to rap said helpless host
    This we promise th’arrogance of pork:
    As the loin which rudely rapped
    The gait of Cole himself, I pray you
    See you not mistake thy name as loin
    As that which wrap’t the Cole entire,
    And suffered summer’s heat in ignoble quiet.
    Soon sweaty clothes shall seem as frosty breeze,
    Humid West Virginia be as polar isle.
    E’en noonday sun thou wilt wish
    To grant you what shall seem as cooling rays.
    Instead so shalt this loin now suffer
    Unmatch’ed heat yet born
    Of frosty will in turn. And turn and turn it shall,
    ‘Til iron shaft of spit did weep,
    Shedding tear for roast perched close above
    The coals undying, whose shim’ring heat
    At last effect the long awaited crunch
    Of crackling and juice on cut run clear.
    Nay, now it face a hotter Cole
    Whose anger justly rise,
    And the four measure pound of loin
    Shall wish it better choice hath made
    Than pound that gracious host
    On hapless foot. Whose cool’ed temper
    And appliance cleanly kept bid supple welcome
    To such mere groceried stock,
    Whose lucky fortune i’the very lowest
    Could stand to rank on plates
    Of friend and family held dear,
    Instead of anger’d heat which pierceth flesh
    And render from offensive loin
    The fat of vengeance, now ran down the side
    Of that which but so short a time before
    Had scoff’d at Cole and threaten’ed his stance.
    Hark all ye would be chill’ed meats
    Think not thee might escape a similar fate
    Dissimulate a glancing blow uncalled
    Or innocently follow gravity’s urges
    To fall upon tread so innocently passed.

    Cole woulds’t thou stably perch where thou art higher
    And barring that, wilt thou be stuck above the fire.

  82. 82.

    freelancer

    @Soonergrunt:

    Phoenix actually had what we Midwesterners call “weather” today. Local news lurves monsoon season, I’m learning. It gives them something to do.

    I took video.

    I was a little winded because I was sprinting from the laundry to my place with a basket full of clean clothes. I’ll be damned if any haboob was going to cancel that out.

  86. 86.

    FlipYrWhig

    @El Cid: I was sure it was based on King Lear and was furiously googling phrases — and kept getting no hits. Is it all original? Staggering at any rate. Hats off.

  89. 89.

    JWL

    ER? I’ve always heard the only treatment for broken toes is the time it takes for them to mend.

    Anyway, bummer- hope they’re only bruised.

  90. 90.

    Schlemizel

    I will sympathize with you John. I woke up at 2AM with the worst attack of gout I have ever had. Even the air from the ceiling fan makes my toe hurt. Hope you didn’t break it, they really can’t do much for it & you’ll be hobbled for a couple of weeks.

  91. 91.

    Soonergrunt

    I just got the soonerbrats home five hours late. I haven’t even had them in the house 10 minutes and I already want to put them back on a plane.
    Hopefully tomorrow they will be less annoying, although one has Asperger’s syndrome and the other is VERY thirteen right now, so maybe not.

  92. 92.

    Bago

    So you’re slipping with the mop, tripping with the dog, and dropping the pork. Ah yeah.

  100. 100.

    aTotheB

    re JC and Feet:

    JC’s “broke two toes” saga reminding me of this Gregory GOrDon http://lightoftheworld.com post on Isaiah 52:7

    see http://dynamicreflections.ning.com/profiles/blog/show?id=1591481%3ABlogPost%3A15030

    ie:

    Physical Proof that Gregory Stuart GOrDon is God

    “How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him that bringeth good tidings, that publisheth peace; that bringeth good tidings of good, that publisheth salvation; that saith unto Zion, Thy God reigneth!”
    I actually never paid any serious attention to my feet until Miss Ebony, one of the transgendered people whom I was living with in California said: “Gregory you have really beautiful feet.” And, even after hearing this I still paid no attention until I came across the above passage one day while studying the Bible. At that point I finally took note of my feet and began to pay attention to other people’s feet. If I must say so myself, my feet are very beautiful especially for a big guy like me.

    I learned of Gregory GOrDon from a 2001 documentary on “Bellevue Inside Out” about the NYC mental hospital. Gregory GOrDon was in the documentary where he notes that he is Jesus Christ.

    If the above feet-post is indication that he still is (or believes he is–take you pick) Jesus.

    The documentary on “Bellevue Inside Out” is quite interesting; youTube link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1nVEN1Reeaw

    Greg’s scenes:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1nVEN1Reeaw&t=27m11s until 29m33s
    Greg GOrDon Intro

    and 6 month later update:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1nVEN1Reeaw&t=1h13m33s unitl 1h13m45s

    Greg GOrDon Update

  101. 101.

    low-tech cyclist

    John – If you’ve got $200 to spare, and someplace (basement, garage, wherever) to put an appliance that takes up roughly the same space as a washer or dryer, get a chest freezer.

    1) You can fit about 6-8 times as much stuff in even a small chest freezer as you can in the freezer that’s part of your fridge. It’s a perfect place to store anything frozen that you don’t need practically every day. And you can store lots of it, too, so you don’t have to run down to the store nearly as often for bread, frozen veggies, whatever.

    2) You get into it by opening the top, which means that all the cold air doesn’t fall out into the room every time you open it.

    3) That also means stuff like that pork loin doesn’t ever fall out of a chest freezer onto your toe when you open it to look for something else.

    My wife and I inherited a chest freezer from her grandmother back in the mid-1990s when grandma moved into a smaller place. I don’t see how we ever managed without one.

  102. 102.

    Brachiator

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN):

    I hate to break it to the writers, but if gunfire breaks out on a major stock exchange, all trading is going to be halted

    But this is stuff that the average viewer doesn’t know about or care about.

    Some co-workers did the Thursday evening marathon of all three films at the local IMAX theater and loved it. I went to a Saturday morning show, because I think that it will be hard to contain all the inevitable spoilers (I pretty much stopped reading anything about the movie about a week before the opening).

    It is a sprawling mess of a movie, but Nolan puts together a very satisfying take on the Batman saga, and makes a film that comprises a proper trilogy. Themes begun in the earlier films continue here.

    Afterwards, I caught up with some of the commentary. Film critic Peter Rainer called the film dark and pessimistic, which is completely wrongheaded. Roger Ebert said the film was not as much fun as a summer comic book movie should be, which misses the point.

    Little things: I can see how some who don’t give a rat’s ass about the source of the characters may find Bane’s mask distracting and un-cinematic. Hiding a face, particularly a mouth, is kinda dumb. But Nolan makes up for this by emphasizing the character’s movement and physical presence. A scene where Bane casually puts his hand on someone’s shoulder becomes extremely menacing.

    In an interview on the BBC film program with Mark Kermode (available as a downloadable podcast via iTunes and other sources) Nolan gets excited when asked if he would like to do a Bond movie. That would be very cool.

    Tried not to say too much about the details of the film, because I don’t think that would be fair, especially in the first week. I was somewhat apprehensive after the disappointments of some of this summer’s films, most notably Prometheus. But for me The Dark Knight Rises delivered the goods.

    One very minor spoilery thing, although this is intimated in the trailer. Conservatives are going to be pissing all over themselves about the supposed class politics of the film. And they may even latch onto the claims of Bane’s comic book creators that they think that they could Mitt Romney as being someone like a Bruce Wayne.

  103. 103.

    Brachiator

    Hmm. For some reason I could not edit my previous post.

    Just wanted to add that I am surprised that John Cole ever makes it out of the house in one piece.

  104. 104.

    Skepticat

    JC, I think that you’re angling for your very own series such as “ER,” starring as each week’s victim. At least you could use the weapon of destruction as a first-aid implement for icing down. My mother once did the same thing with a big bottle of olive oil, which made a mess of more than her toes.
    If it’s your phalanges rather than your metatarsals or cuneiforms, you probably ought to skip the annoyance of an ER visit, as they can do nothing but suggest you ice, elevate, tape, rest, and curse.

    This is the first year on the island down south that I haven’t broken at least one toe, which I attribute to the fact that finally, in my mid-sixties, I’ve learned to wear shoes around the house. Or perhaps I’m just slowing down–kicking furniture as I rushed by seemed to be a favorite vehicle for foot injuries.

    Hope you’re more comfortable soon. Broken toes are a misery.

  105. 105.

    Southern Beale

    HOLY FUCKBALLS:

    Mormon Church ‘owns unregulated gun sale website’
    __
    One of the most active and unregulated gun sale websites in America is owned by the Mormon Church, an investigation by New York’s Mayor Michael Bloomberg has revealed.

    WTF? A church that sells guns???

  106. 106.

    bemused

    I’m shocked that no one in the goat thread below, unless I missed it, didn’t shout out for a new tag line, “Leave Goat Man ALONE!”.

    A little over a week ago, we had to put our sweet senior citizen dog to sleep after a two day illness and we and our other dog are trying to adjust to a new “normal” life at our home without her. Five dogs and seven cats have left us behind over the years and it just doesn’t get any easier.

  107. 107.

    pika

    There are many things in a freezer that vegetarians can use to break toes: frozen bricks of tofu, for instance, or, ironically, some big-ass ice packs that one would use when a frozen brick falls on one’s toes. John, I hope that you aren’t in the ER and that you’re merely bruised.

  108. 108.

    Poopyman

    Not to poop on the garden thread above, but, Penn State Pres. Rodney Erickson:

    … I now believe that, contrary to its original intention, Coach Paterno’s statue has become a source of division and an obstacle to healing in our University and beyond. For that reason, I have decided that it is in the best interest of our university and public safety to remove the statue and store it in a secure location. I believe that, were it to remain, the statue will be a recurring wound to the multitude of individuals across the nation and beyond who have been the victims of child abuse….

    More at the link.

  109. 109.

    Valdivia

    John I hope you are feeling better. I broke a toe last fall and it hurts like hell but not much they can do for you. I was lucky to have the cream version of Voltaren (the anti-inflammatory) and that helped a lot.

  110. 110.

    Odie Hugh Manatee

    Sucks to be your toes John. No, don’t suck on your toes! Is it possible that Tunch was willing that pork out of the fridge and your foot got in the way?

    I’m finally digging the motorcycle out of the garage because… well, just because! It’s been parked for the last ten months as I’ve not been interested in riding it as the weather has sucked all summer long here (50’s to 60’s). I have it connected to a battery tender so all I had to do was give it a good cleaning and fire it up, which it did quite nicely. I just noticed that the weather service is fucking with us because they say that we will hit 80 degrees on Monday and every time they have predicted 70 or above this summer they’ve been wrong. It’s supposed to be 62 today and on Tuesday so I’m trying to figure out where they pulled that 80 out for Monday.

    Probably their ass. Either way, I’m riding the motorcycle on Monday, 80 or not.

  112. 112.

    muddy

    @Schlemizel:

    I will sympathize with you John. I woke up at 2AM with the worst attack of gout I have ever had. Even the air from the ceiling fan makes my toe hurt.

    I have had gout in the past and I would put the pain right up there with childbirth. Can’t put a sheet over your foot, can’t tolerate the slightest disturbance of air, it’s just pure exquisite pain.

    My pharmacist told me about cherry juice, and I have a small glass every day as a prophylactic. Have not had an attack since. I get R.W.Knudsen “Just tart cherry”. I tried the black cherry, I found it disgusting. I also make popsicles out of the cherry juice. HTH

  113. 113.

    WayneL

    Man, I hope you don’t have to go to the ER, John. I recently made a trip having burned my hand when I dumped boiling pasta on it. Second-degree burns, but pretty minor. Cost $2000. My part of it was $600. It cost $350 for a tetanus shot, not including the $95 for sticking me with a needle. The salve was a buck-fifty! $26 for pain medication? Seriously, a huge reason for the massive increase in health care costs are ER costs. The middle-class worker has not had a pay raise in ten years because of rising health insurance. I’ll not go to the ER again unless I have blood coming out of BOTH ears.

  114. 114.

    JoyfulA

    @LesGS: What with “doggie paddle” and all that.

    (A cousin once threw me as a child in “deep” water to see if it’s true that a kid in water who hasn’t learned to swim will naturally doggie paddle. A kid, at least me, will do so, but only well enough to keep from drowning for about 30 seconds.)

  115. 115.

    muddy

    @low-tech cyclist:

    1) You can fit about 6-8 times as much stuff in even a small chest freezer as you can in the freezer that’s part of your fridge. It’s a perfect place to store anything frozen that you don’t need practically every day. And you can store lots of it, too, so you don’t have to run down to the store nearly as often for bread, frozen veggies, whatever.

    I got one recently about the size of a washing machine. The best feature is that there is a drawer at the bottom as well as the top opening up. So you never have to dig deep down. Also there are 2 different temps, really helpful.
    http://www.haieramerica.com/appliances/freezers/lw145aw

  116. 116.

    bemused

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    Always tough even when you know it’s the best and only thing to do for your dog. The vet and his wife commented how sweet our dog was and were in tears too when she was put to sleep. She was able to enjoy all the things she loved especially walks in the woods even with arthritis and other old age issues until she became ill. Even a couple of hours before she died, as sick as she was, she got up and wanted to go for a walk and she got a short amble in the yard. She had a lot of spirit and was an extremely happy girl all her life despite painful health issues.

  118. 118.

    AnnaN

    The summer I was 15, in three separate incidents, I managed to break all the toes on my right foot; the baby toe got hit twice. After my mom talked to the nurse on call I ended up just taping the things together and hobbling. Not much else can be done.

  119. 119.

    muddy

    @bemused: I’m so sorry for your loss. I have had to do that so many times, you never get used to it. Each time the vet and I get into a conversation about how we wish humans could be afforded as much dignity when the time came.

  121. 121.

    bemused

    @muddy:

    So true. I think of that often when the phony Christians will do anything to stop abortions but abandon children to poverty, hunger, inadequate healthcare and education. I’m sure most of them treat their pets more humanely.

  123. 123.

    SteveTGrav

    Damn, that sounds painful. One thing I’ve learned living in Iowa: you never hear the pork loin that has your name on it.

  124. 124.

    Ruckus

    Anne did a post a while back for me about how I could not keep my rescue cocker any longer.
    Well he went back yesterday. A man with a big heart and means to make it happen flew him and about 10-12 other dogs to new homes, as he does regularly. I feel like shit that I had to send my dog away. He was an extremely high maintenance dog, he wasn’t even a very friendly dog, but he was my dog, my counterpoint in this world. I loved that little bastard. He restricted my life in so many ways but far more importantly he gave me a point of reference and stability. For that he only asked for some food and a safe place to lay down. I got the far better end of the deal.
    He gets to move on with what little time is left of his life, the place he went to seems real nice and loving. I’m sure he will be better off.

    @bemused: I’m sorry about your dog and the pain all of you are going through.

  126. 126.

    Schlemizel

    @muddy: Thanks. I have been drinking black cherry juice on & off since my first attack about a year ago. But I guess I have to be more disciplined & have some every day.

  127. 127.

    Schlemizel

    @bemused: dang that hurts, I know there is nothing I can say to make it better. I just hope you can focus on how happy you guys made each other.

  128. 128.

    NotMax

    @Schlemizel

    Doubtless something you already know, but just in case:

    Especially when flare-ups happen, avoid both red wine and shellfish.

    Between flare-ups, avoid those or ingest in extreme moderation.

  130. 130.

    muddy

    @NotMax: Also organ meats. And bizarrely, dried beans. At first I tried not to eat so much meat and fish as they told me to, so I was eating a lot of beans. Got a flare-up, looked online, and low and behold…

    I always bring this up when people say, “It’s from rich food”.

  131. 131.

    Rafer Janders

    @Poopyman:

    Fuck them. They don’t get to hide their shame. Leave the statue up as a constant weeping sore, a reminder of Paterno’s and Penn State’s moral turpitude.

  132. 132.

    Ruckus

    @Odie Hugh Manatee:
    I’ve ridden motorcycles in temps from 19 to somewhere north of 110. 19 is the worse because your breath freezes before it hits your faceshield. Which means you have to open it and risk frostbite. OK, suffer frostbite. At 25 and above that doesn’t happen. At 50-80 there is no snow, no frostbite, no heat stroke, no sweating till dehydration. Good times, best of times.

  133. 133.

    WaterGirl

    @Ruckus: Ruckus, I am so sad for both of you that you had to let your dog go.

    A couple weeks ago, I thought I had a line on someone to take your dog, but I didn’t want to say anything in case it didn’t pan out. It was a nice, sweet, older lady who wanted an older dog, but it didn’t end up working out. So I’m awfully glad to know he has found a home.

    I hadn’t forgotten about him, and I know you won’t, either.

  134. 134.

    Ruckus

    @WaterGirl:
    Thanks.
    This guy was a handful. I’m not sure a sweet, older lady would fit the bill for him now. Don’t get me wrong I’ve met some older ladies who could kick ass but the word sweet was/is not usually applied.
    I think Mr. Bud has one, maybe two years left in him, I’m sad that I can’t help make them good. And let’s face it, I miss my buddy. We were like Felix and Oscar. I’m not letting on which is which.

  135. 135.

    Soonergrunt

    @tjmn: He actually did much better than his younger sister. He’s 18, and he’s actually matured quite a bit in the last couple of years, but many of the aspie personality traits, like having to monopolize the conversation, and only wanting to talk about a very limited subset of interests seem at times to have gotten worse as his stress levels, vis a vis graduating high school next year, not finding a job this summer, and so on have been issues.

  136. 136.

    WaterGirl

    @Ruckus:

    Have you checked out the new tv series Common Law? The two cops have a whole Felix and Oscar thing going on. I think it’s fun, and I am surprised that I haven’t heard anybody here talk about it*.

    *editor’s note: I accidentally typed “tit” instead of “it”, but I was pretty sure somebody here had talked about that recently, one way or another, so I made the correction.

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