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You are here: Home / The Real Problem: England Is Not The Right Height.

The Real Problem: England Is Not The Right Height.

by Tom Levenson|  July 26, 20123:36 pm| 185 Comments

This post is in: Romney of the Uncanny Valley, Schadenfreude

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Thanks to Joshua Keating, posting over at Foreign Policy, we learn what Romney really, truly thinks of his current hosts (h/t Atrios):

England [sic] is just a small island. Its roads and houses are small. With few exceptions, it doesn’t make things that people in the rest of the world want to buy. And if it hadn’t been separated from the continent by water, it almost certainly would have been lost to Hitler’s ambitions. Yet only two lifetimes ago, Britain ruled the largest and wealthiest empire in the history of humankind. Britain controlled a quarter of the earth’s land and a quarter of the earth’s population.

That’s from his increasingly ironically titled book, No Apology.

Well, (a):

Suck. On. This. Mr. Mitt:

 

Top that with some steroidally swollen MacMansion in Malibu La Jolla, you unctuous, climbing, nouveau slime-doggy*

And (b): Mitt shouldn’t worry about apologizing for America to foreigners; if what we’ve seen just in a few hours is any guide, he’ll have a months-long (at least) backlog of personal sorries to deliver by next Tuesday.

Oddly, I think I’ve got to start reading Mitt’s golden prose soon.  I’ll tell you all why after I’m done with it….

Bonus Romney allegorical image:

*”Slime-doggy” is an insult directed at Arnie in some otherwise long forgotten episode of L.A. Law. I have for years longed to fling it at just the right target.  I feel….satisfied.

Update:  Via the Guardian’s live blog of Mitt gaffes I learn (first) that John Podhoretz, of all people, has started to pile on:

Romney in London. Come on. We needed this. It’s a little comic relief. Kind of like Mr. Bean, only he’s an American.

As the Guardian puts it, that would be would-be-President Bean to you proles…not exactly the image sought at the first dance of a candidate’s foreign policy debutantant ball.

And then there’s the genially oafish Tory Boris Johnson at the torch lighting ceremony, taking the piss out of Mitt in front of a live audience of zillions and a broadcast viewership of gazillions:

I hear there’s a guy called Mitt Romney who wants to know whether we’re ready. Are we ready?

Some guy.

That’s gotta hurt.

Images:  Jones’ Views of the Seats, Mansions, Castles Etc. of Noblemen and Gentlemen, View of Blenheim Palace, 1829.

Jan Prost, Death and the Miser, before 1529.

Cross posted

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Previous Post: « He’s Right
Next Post: Everything You Hate About Political Journalism In One Post »

Reader Interactions

185Comments

  1. 1.

    Valdivia

    July 26, 2012 at 3:38 pm

    I love this post. Every image and every single snarky dagger dipped in wit and elegance. Thank you.

  2. 2.

    Davis X. Machina

    July 26, 2012 at 3:40 pm

    We sent the UK a real, breathing, Tom Buchanan.

  3. 3.

    rikyrah

    July 26, 2012 at 3:41 pm

    did the Mayor of London clown Willard?

  4. 4.

    jibeaux

    July 26, 2012 at 3:41 pm

    I thought this story couldn’t get any better until I saw headlines that he was “walking back” his criticism of the Olympics. The man can’t even resist flip-flopping his insults!

  5. 5.

    Villago Delenda Est

    July 26, 2012 at 3:42 pm

    As I pointed out on a previous thread, that teensy little island once had an empire that controlled nearly a quarter of the Earth’s land surface.

    Not bad for a “nation of shopkeepers”.

  6. 6.

    beltane

    July 26, 2012 at 3:43 pm

    @rikyrah: Yes, and in front of a crowd of 60,000.

  7. 7.

    redshirt

    July 26, 2012 at 3:43 pm

    Well, do they have sprawling McMansions with car elevators everywhere? No. #Mittwasright

  8. 8.

    Villago Delenda Est

    July 26, 2012 at 3:43 pm

    @Davis X. Machina:

    Every bit as careless and clueless as the fictional original, too.

  9. 9.

    BGinCHI

    July 26, 2012 at 3:43 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est: Are you referencing the Graham Parker song?

  10. 10.

    Petorado

    July 26, 2012 at 3:45 pm

    This is pure genius from the Mittster’s campaign: Mitt goes overseas and trashes America’s reputation; the Obama Administration then comes out and says something like “Hey Europe, all Americans aren’t this idiotic”; the Romney campaign goes ballistic over how “there you go again” Obama is apologizing for America when Mitt knows America is too exceptional to ever apologize for, even when he tactlessly insults a foreign nation he’s visiting. Brilliant! Fox News will be all over it!

  11. 11.

    BGinCHI

    July 26, 2012 at 3:45 pm

    We’ve said it here a hundred times already, but this is what happens when you are very rich. You do not know how the world works or how to deal with situations in which things happen that are mundane.

    Romney has been living in a bubble his whole life.

    Moops.

  12. 12.

    quannlace

    July 26, 2012 at 3:46 pm

    Sweet Jesus, somoebody wanna remind Romney of a little thing called the Blitz, where London was bombed almost nightly? Right, that mightly Channel was all that kept the Nazi’s from marching into Picadilly.
    Never mind the RAF and the courage of the British people.
    Man, I’m getting all indignant on the Brit’s behalf!

  13. 13.

    Keith

    July 26, 2012 at 3:46 pm

    Mitt love small island.

  14. 14.

    beltane

    July 26, 2012 at 3:47 pm

    Mitt Romney may be whiter than Wonder Bread but that doesn’t mean he understands the first thing about the British. What a Moroni.

  15. 15.

    Comrade Dread

    July 26, 2012 at 3:47 pm

    Yes, but aside from the law, a rich literary tradition, the industrial revolution, and economics, what have the British ever done for us?

  16. 16.

    beltane

    July 26, 2012 at 3:48 pm

    @Comrade Dread: They gave us The Beatles and Adam Ant, what more could anyone ask for?

  17. 17.

    Tonal Crow

    July 26, 2012 at 3:48 pm

    What a train-wreck.

    Suggested tag: Romney’s worse than Sarah Palin.

  18. 18.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    July 26, 2012 at 3:49 pm

    Another verdict from1 Romney mtg: ‘Apparently devoid of charm, warmth, humour or sincerity’

    Whitehall insiders after their meeting with Romney

    I am having way too much fun with the #romneyshambles hashtag today.

  19. 19.

    blondie

    July 26, 2012 at 3:50 pm

    Why does Romney want Great Britain to hate us?

  20. 20.

    Villago Delenda Est

    July 26, 2012 at 3:51 pm

    @BGinCHI:

    Quoting another “Master of the Universe”, a Corsican of minor nobility who caused something of a ruckus at the beginning of the 19th century.

  21. 21.

    rlrr

    July 26, 2012 at 3:51 pm

    Britain ruled the largest and wealthiest empire in the history of humankind. Britain controlled a quarter of the earth’s land and a quarter of the earth’s population.

    That was not necessarily a good thing for those that were controlled…

  22. 22.

    SteveinSC

    July 26, 2012 at 3:51 pm

    Didn’t I read somewhere that Romney graduated with a degree in English from BYU? Jesus, that was a waste of tuition money.

  23. 23.

    BGinCHI

    July 26, 2012 at 3:51 pm

    @beltane: The Puritan strain in American politics?

  24. 24.

    beltane

    July 26, 2012 at 3:51 pm

    @BGinCHI: I don’t recall Prince Charles throwing around gratuitous insults every place he goes. Mitt’s problems extend beyond those of the average rich bubble boy. He is just a born asshole.

  25. 25.

    catclub

    July 26, 2012 at 3:52 pm

    @Comrade Dread: Blancmange

  26. 26.

    rlrr

    July 26, 2012 at 3:53 pm

    @beltane:

    What a Moroni.

    I see what you did there.

  27. 27.

    BGinCHI

    July 26, 2012 at 3:53 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est: There’s a good Parker song about it:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=krZpWbrU09s

  28. 28.

    El Cid

    July 26, 2012 at 3:54 pm

    All these unwarranted attacks by a buncha Yurrpeen soshullists prove that Yurpeens hate Amurka and love Obama soshullism.

  29. 29.

    Villago Delenda Est

    July 26, 2012 at 3:54 pm

    @Comrade Dread:

    Well, given that modern wingtards talk a lot about Adam Smith, but have clearly never bothered to crack open the tomes, it’s not surprising that they don’t know of the British contribution to the study of economics.

    Well, if you want to be really detailed, the Scottish contribution, but hey, UK 1701 and all that rot.

  30. 30.

    beltane

    July 26, 2012 at 3:55 pm

    One has to wonder if Mitt was this charming while attempting to proselytize the French during the Vietnam War.

  31. 31.

    BGinCHI

    July 26, 2012 at 3:55 pm

    @beltane: There is a huge cultural difference there. At least most of the nobility are urbane.

    Your rich American guy doesn’t know shit except for how to make money and how to spend it on stuff his friends all have.

    They mostly know fuck all about culture or a lot of things about the world.

  32. 32.

    dmsilev

    July 26, 2012 at 3:55 pm

    Well, at this rate he might as well stay and watch his wife’s dancing horse. I mean, it’s not like things could get any worse.

    Um, right?

  33. 33.

    Villago Delenda Est

    July 26, 2012 at 3:55 pm

    @Comrade Dread:

    Well, given that modern wingtards talk a lot about Adam Smith, but have clearly never bothered to crack open the tomes, it’s not surprising that they don’t know of the British contribution to the study of economics.

    Well, if you want to be really detailed, the Scottish contribution, but hey, UK 1701 and all that rot.

  34. 34.

    Calouste

    July 26, 2012 at 3:56 pm

    @beltane:

    Well, Prince Charles is not going around throwing gratuitous insults every place he goes, because his dad is a lot better at that. Not Romney-level, but pretty good.

  35. 35.

    chopper

    July 26, 2012 at 3:56 pm

    good thing mittens never actually practiced law. “drunken hicks of the jury…”

  36. 36.

    Villago Delenda Est

    July 26, 2012 at 3:57 pm

    @beltane:

    Given the mass conversion of the French to LDS, I’d say he was a smashing success!

  37. 37.

    schrodinger's cat

    July 26, 2012 at 4:00 pm

    He is insulting mummy, how rude.

  38. 38.

    Feebog

    July 26, 2012 at 4:00 pm

    Can’t wait until the romneybot 2.0 arrives in Isreal. He will probably make some comment about how all those beanies are missing their propellers.

  39. 39.

    Legalize

    July 26, 2012 at 4:01 pm

    @jibeaux:
    That sounds like apologizing for America to me.

  40. 40.

    canuckistani

    July 26, 2012 at 4:02 pm

    Triumph Speed Triple.
    Highland Park 15 YO Scotch Whisky.
    The Clash.

    Case closed.

  41. 41.

    trollhattan

    July 26, 2012 at 4:02 pm

    @dmsilev:
    You mean Prince Gluey?

  42. 42.

    Tonal Crow

    July 26, 2012 at 4:02 pm

    @Feebog:

    Can’t wait until the romneybot 2.0 arrives in Isreal. He will probably make some comment about how all those beanies are missing their propellers.

    Ya. Can’t wait ’til he offers Netanyahu a ham sandwich.

    —
    Tag: Romney’s worse than Sarah Palin.

  43. 43.

    trollhattan

    July 26, 2012 at 4:02 pm

    @canuckistani:
    Mmm, Speed Triple.

  44. 44.

    Villago Delenda Est

    July 26, 2012 at 4:03 pm

    @rlrr:

    Given that the 13 North American colonies departed from the Empire, through violence, in the latter half of the 18th century, before the Empire reached its zenith, it would appear that some did indeed not think the Empire to be a good thing.

    Still, the Rmoneytron’s brilliant public relations coup today in the UK was clearly forseen by him two years ago.

  45. 45.

    pseudonymous in nc

    July 26, 2012 at 4:04 pm

    Britain: where lots of people live in small houses that are older than Mitt’s religion.

  46. 46.

    beltane

    July 26, 2012 at 4:05 pm

    @Feebog: I fully expect Bishop Romney to make some form of offensive statement that will make the religious crazies there erupt in even more craziness. Also, Netanyahu and Adelson might not have a problem with the posthumous baptism of Holocaust victims and other Jews, but other people feel very strongly about the issue.

  47. 47.

    schrodinger's cat

    July 26, 2012 at 4:05 pm

    Romney’s worse than Sarah Palin.

    McCain thought so too.

  48. 48.

    IowaOldLady

    July 26, 2012 at 4:05 pm

    In the last few hours, I’ve seen at least a dozen semi-kind nostalgic things said about W. THAT is how bad this is.

  49. 49.

    bemused

    July 26, 2012 at 4:07 pm

    @beltane:

    The Guardian live blog is brutal and hilarious. We need an equivalent live blog for Poland and Israel.

    @Feebog:

    Adelson will be there holding Mitt’s hand.

  50. 50.

    Culture of Truth

    July 26, 2012 at 4:07 pm

    English motherfucker, do you speak it!?

    They exported that you mormon twat!

  51. 51.

    trollhattan

    July 26, 2012 at 4:08 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est:
    From comments on BBC website:

    American technology is simply amazing. Romney is so lifelike, how do you do it? Industrial Light and Magic is it?

  52. 52.

    Culture of Truth

    July 26, 2012 at 4:08 pm

    Spiderman, Batman, Abe Lincoln, all British

  53. 53.

    pseudonymous in nc

    July 26, 2012 at 4:09 pm

    Top that with some steroidally swollen MacMansion in Malibu, you unctuous, climbing, nouveau slime-doggy

    If you read contemporary accounts — especially Jonathan Swift’s — there’s some funny stuff written about the spiralling cost of Blenheim Palace, because a grateful nation basically gave it to John Churchill without setting a limit on the total bill. It’s a monument to a pretty huge ego; of Vanburgh’s great houses, Castle Howard’s much prettier.

  54. 54.

    bemused

    July 26, 2012 at 4:09 pm

    @IowaOldLady:

    And that is so damn wrong. Someone make it stop.

  55. 55.

    beltane

    July 26, 2012 at 4:09 pm

    @bemused: Haaretz will certainly have a good liveblog but they are now behind a paywall and I’m not paying. Maybe The Guardian will oblige us and send a reporter or two to Poland and Israel.

  56. 56.

    Tom Levenson

    July 26, 2012 at 4:10 pm

    @canuckistani: Vincent Black Shadow.

    Just the pure distillation of awesome. No arguments to the contrary will be heard.

    Just ask this guy.

  57. 57.

    Tonal Crow

    July 26, 2012 at 4:11 pm

    @trollhattan:

    @Villago Delenda Est:
    From comments on BBC website:

    American technology is simply amazing. Romney is so lifelike, how do you do it? Industrial Light and Magic is it?

    No. Lifelike Doll Co.

  58. 58.

    Villago Delenda Est

    July 26, 2012 at 4:11 pm

    @trollhattan:

    Yup, the snark is flowing freely in the UK today.

  59. 59.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    July 26, 2012 at 4:12 pm

    Nobody wrote a return address on the back of Mitt’s neck, right?

    Have to agree with u about this @Mittromney fella …..what a complete Bellend .”

    Oh I love my fellow countrymen on days like this.

  60. 60.

    moonbat

    July 26, 2012 at 4:13 pm

    @canuckistani: You are correct, sir!

  61. 61.

    bemused

    July 26, 2012 at 4:13 pm

    @beltane:

    Seriously, reporters worldwide should get in on covering the Mitt circus.

  62. 62.

    jimmiraybob

    July 26, 2012 at 4:13 pm

    I know that it’s only a rumor at this stage but do you think there’s anything to the story the the Secret Service codename for Mitt (R-Anglo Saxons) is Clark Griswald?*

    *I know that it’s probably a violation of an internet tradition but I’m bringing this up from the basement. The start of good rumors needs space.

  63. 63.

    Culture of Truth

    July 26, 2012 at 4:14 pm

    Bear in mind this is a man who turned a plate of free homemade cookies into an incident.

  64. 64.

    the Conster

    July 26, 2012 at 4:14 pm

    Now everyone knows how us Bay Staters feel about that asshole. He started shit talking us half way through his term when he couldn’t fill the legislature with his Republican buddies. It only took Londoners one day to figure it out.

  65. 65.

    bemused

    July 26, 2012 at 4:17 pm

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    What is a Bellend?

    @jimmiraybob:

    I laughed but Clark Griswold was a lovable fuckup.

  66. 66.

    pragmatism

    July 26, 2012 at 4:18 pm

    la jolla mcmansion with car elevator rather than malibu. but otherwise spot on, Dr.

  67. 67.

    Villago Delenda Est

    July 26, 2012 at 4:19 pm

    @jimmiraybob:

    Please. Clark Griswold was the model of a polite goodwill ambassador of the United States compared to OvenMitt.

    I fully expect OvenMitt to say something about visiting the Polish resort at Auschwitz when he hits Jerusalem.

  68. 68.

    paulfl

    July 26, 2012 at 4:19 pm

    The narrative of Mitt Romney as a clueless and out of touch elitist businessman with no skills at handling the most important topics that would face a president is no stereotype; it is reality. Romney has already destroyed his only major foreign trip as presidential candidate, deeply and cruelly insulting our closest allies in the entire world with a thoughtless and baseless remark. An election of Romney to the White House could very well lead us into another conflict with England, because why would he tone down his arrogant rhetoric when he truly doesn’t think he’s said anything wrong? Romney is a bumbling and dangerous neophyte on the world stage.

  69. 69.

    Mino

    July 26, 2012 at 4:20 pm

    Romney is doing such a job in England that I’m afraid, when he goes to Israel, the Israelis will declare war on us and forget about Iran.

  70. 70.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    July 26, 2012 at 4:21 pm

    @bemused:

    A certain bit of a man’s anatomy.

    Team Romney “American’s don’t care about foreign press”

    http://2012.talkingpointsmemo.com/2012/07/romney-olympics-london-bobby-jindal-bob-mcdonnell.php?ref=fpnewsfeed

    Helloooooo! The fucking internet! How does that work!

  71. 71.

    The Thin Black Duke

    July 26, 2012 at 4:21 pm

    Dear God, please don’t allow Mitt Romney to become President of the United States. I don’t think I could stand the rest of the world mocking us stupid Americans for the next four years.

  72. 72.

    David Koch

    July 26, 2012 at 4:21 pm

    He’s a non-stop gaffe robot. Like Don Adams, without the intended humor.

  73. 73.

    Culture of Truth

    July 26, 2012 at 4:21 pm

    small. wet. good.

  74. 74.

    David Hunt

    July 26, 2012 at 4:21 pm

    @trollhattan:

    American technology is simply amazing. Romney is so lifelike, how do you do it? Industrial Light and Magic is it?

    .

    I sometimes wonder if Mitt’s plan for retirement after the Presidency is to go to Disney World, sit in the Hall of Presidents and wave at the audience a few dozen times a day…

  75. 75.

    homerhk

    July 26, 2012 at 4:21 pm

    I would encourage you all to see this video of Boris Johnson, Mayor of London. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-19006480

    As a Londoner, I can’t stand the guy but really it’s quite funny and I love the call and response at the end – very deliberately asking for “yes we can” as a response.

    When you have tossers like this taking the piss out of you, I’m afraid it’s all over.

  76. 76.

    pseudonymous in nc

    July 26, 2012 at 4:22 pm

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    Oh I love my fellow countrymen on days like this.

    A foreign visitor hasn’t prompted this much support for Tory leaders since the Luftwaffe.

  77. 77.

    redshirt

    July 26, 2012 at 4:22 pm

    @the Conster: Amen! Preach it. How anyone in MA could vote for this clown after how he performed here is beyond me. But then, I must confess I simply don’t understand the insane mind.

  78. 78.

    redshirt

    July 26, 2012 at 4:23 pm

    @Mino: Hmm. That might work out best for all related parties.

  79. 79.

    Liberty60

    July 26, 2012 at 4:23 pm

    If I wasn’t such an Alinskyite, Chicago-Way leftist thug, I would almost feel sorry for Mitt.

    Almost.

  80. 80.

    Liberty60

    July 26, 2012 at 4:24 pm

    @pseudonymous in nc:

    A foreign visitor hasn’t prompted this much support for Tory leaders since the Luftwaffe

    For the Win!

  81. 81.

    amk

    July 26, 2012 at 4:25 pm

    Is the corrupt american media covering his sorry a$$ yet again ?

  82. 82.

    Culture of Truth

    July 26, 2012 at 4:25 pm

    @Mino: First Romney united all England – until recently a grumbling mix of class and races – next, the whole world!

  83. 83.

    beltane

    July 26, 2012 at 4:25 pm

    @pseudonymous in nc:

    A foreign visitor hasn’t prompted this much support for Tory leaders since the Luftwaffe.

    OK, you win, nothing more to say about the matter.

  84. 84.

    trollhattan

    July 26, 2012 at 4:26 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est:
    The smokestacks will doubtless be of the right height. Will he invoke Joseph Smith’s persecution and say, “I totally relate to what ‘you people’ went through.”

  85. 85.

    Raven

    July 26, 2012 at 4:28 pm

    @paulfl: It’s will help him with his base.

  86. 86.

    fuzed

    July 26, 2012 at 4:28 pm

    and how long until we go to war with UK/England/London?

  87. 87.

    the Conster

    July 26, 2012 at 4:28 pm

    @redshirt:

    I commute in and out of Boston, and the Obama:Romney stickers are running about 20:1. I travel to Maine quite a bit and it’s the same thing, except pick up trucks from NH are all for Romney.

  88. 88.

    Rob in CT

    July 26, 2012 at 4:28 pm

    Given this part:

    Yet only two lifetimes ago, Britain ruled the largest and wealthiest empire in the history of humankind. Britain controlled a quarter of the earth’s land and a quarter of the earth’s population

    I have to assume this was to set up a bit about how their superior culture/institutions allowed this small, rather insignificant island to dominate the planet. We should, obviously, emulate this (by having low low taxes on rich people) and since we’re already awesomer… well… great country or Greatest Country? Amirite?

  89. 89.

    Tonal Crow

    July 26, 2012 at 4:29 pm

    @trollhattan:

    @Villago Delenda Est: The smokestacks will doubtless be of the right height. Will he invoke Joseph Smith’s persecution and say, “I totally relate to what ‘you people’ went through.”

    Please let it be so. Maybe he can also say something about tax hikes being “like Hitler”.

    —
    Tag: Romney’s worse than Sarah Palin.

  90. 90.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    July 26, 2012 at 4:29 pm

    @pseudonymous in nc:

    I agree. Internet won for the day. I am so stealing it.

  91. 91.

    wrb

    July 26, 2012 at 4:29 pm

    Boris Johnson mocking Romney in front of 600,000:

    The Geiger counter of Olympo-mania is going to go zoink! off the scale! People are coming from around the world, and they’re seeing us, and they’re seeing the greatest country on Earth, aren’t they? There are some people who are coming from around the world who don’t yet know about all the preparations we’ve done to get London ready in the last seven years. I hear there’s a guy called Mitt Romney who wants to know whether we’re ready. Are we ready? (crowd goes wild)

  92. 92.

    NancyDarling

    July 26, 2012 at 4:29 pm

    @Litlebritdifrnt: I had to look up “Bellend”. What a classy way to say “dick”. I love your countrymen too!

    I learn stuff at BJ.

  93. 93.

    wrb

    July 26, 2012 at 4:29 pm

    Romney in London. Come on. We needed this. It’s a little comic relief. Kind of like Mr. Bean, only he’s an American.

    -John Podhoretz

  94. 94.

    Patricia Kayden

    July 26, 2012 at 4:30 pm

    Y’all should really read the entire Guardian blog re Mitt’s gaffes. Hilarious! Perhaps The Bot and his Anglo Saxon self can get himself elected over there and leave us alone.

  95. 95.

    Mino

    July 26, 2012 at 4:30 pm

    @redshirt: In a Mouse That Roared sense?

  96. 96.

    homerhk

    July 26, 2012 at 4:31 pm

    @NancyDarling: technically speaking Bellend is not a dick, just the end of one.

  97. 97.

    fuzed

    July 26, 2012 at 4:32 pm

    ok, does Mitt make George W. Bush look good or what?

  98. 98.

    Maude

    July 26, 2012 at 4:32 pm

    @amk:
    Romney wouldn’t answer US press questions. He’s toast with them.

  99. 99.

    redshirt

    July 26, 2012 at 4:34 pm

    @the Conster: I agree with your anecdotal evidence, making the same trips. I’ve seen a flowering of Obama stickers in the last few weeks. Warms the cockles it does.

  100. 100.

    Culture of Truth

    July 26, 2012 at 4:34 pm

    @pseudonymous in nc: Win

  101. 101.

    Greed Is God

    July 26, 2012 at 4:34 pm

    A Counterfeit Yankee In King Arthur’s Court.

  102. 102.

    jimmiraybob

    July 26, 2012 at 4:34 pm

    I retract the secret service code name Clark Griswald rumor. The problem is that any possible comparison to any comparable bumblers that I can think of runs into the “but they have human qualities” problem.

  103. 103.

    fuzed

    July 26, 2012 at 4:35 pm

    there’s a compiled list of gaffe’s
    http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/us-news-blog/2012/jul/26/mitt-romney-britain-gaffes#start-of-comments

    “At Downing Street: ‘Looking out through No 10’s backside’
    There are two things you should know before you “look out of the backside of 10 Downing Street”, as Mitt Romney did on Thursday.

    Firstly, in Britain, “backside” means “ass”. As in the part of the body. Secondly, “10 Downing Street” is often used in political reporting as a synonym for a press spokesman for the prime minister, in the same way as “the White House” can say things or have opinions.

    Gaffe rating: 2/10. A minor linguistic misunderstanding.

  104. 104.

    redshirt

    July 26, 2012 at 4:35 pm

    @Mino: Cool reference. Had to check it out – interesting! But the opposite was my intent.

  105. 105.

    beltane

    July 26, 2012 at 4:35 pm

    @the Conster: There are far more Obama than Romney stickers on the cars I’ve seen in northern NH at least. Here in VT I am waiting patiently for my Republican neighbors to put a Romney sign up as they’ve done for every other GOP candidate in the past but so far nothing. Other Republicans around here are still stubbornly clinging to their Ron Paul lawn signs; I have a hunch these people probably won’t be won over by Ann Romney’s dancing horse.

  106. 106.

    rea

    July 26, 2012 at 4:35 pm

    I particulary liked Prime Minister Cameron’s response to Mitt’s Olympic comments:

    We are holding an Olympic Games in one of the busiest, most active, bustling cities anywhere in the world. Of course it’s easier if you hold an Olympic Games in the middle of nowhere.

  107. 107.

    Greed Is God

    July 26, 2012 at 4:36 pm

    The GOP Network’s new sitcom: “Everybody Hates Mitt”

  108. 108.

    kay

    July 26, 2012 at 4:36 pm

    These aren’t gaffes, they’re put-downs, and Romney does this constantly.

    He’d be incapable of going to a city hosting the Olympic games without weighing in critically.

    That’s why he went there. So he could bring up his role in managing the Olympics. I think he, his campaign advisors and pundits are wrong about the importance of his managing an Olympics anyway. They’ve so over-sold it that it now seems almost comical.
    Too, they’re RIGHT about London versus Salt Lake City. It WAS easier in Salt Lake City.

  109. 109.

    Tom Levenson

    July 26, 2012 at 4:36 pm

    @pseudonymous in nc:

    A foreign visitor hasn’t prompted this much support for Tory leaders since the Luftwaffe.

    Spot on. Just tweeted it.

  110. 110.

    beltane

    July 26, 2012 at 4:37 pm

    @fuzed: “Backside” also means “ass” in the USA, at least it does here in the northeast. Why does Mitt say such weird things?

  111. 111.

    Tonal Crow

    July 26, 2012 at 4:38 pm

    @Greed Is God:

    A Counterfeit Yankee In King Arthur’s Court.

    A Confederate symp in King Arthur’s Court.

    —
    Tag: Romney’s worse than Sarah Palin.

  112. 112.

    Bobby Thomson

    July 26, 2012 at 4:38 pm

    @Comrade Dread: Win.

  113. 113.

    redshirt

    July 26, 2012 at 4:38 pm

    @beltane: Needs OS upgrade.

  114. 114.

    Culture of Truth

    July 26, 2012 at 4:39 pm

    Never have so many taken so much offense by so few words.

  115. 115.

    The Right Honorable Member for, the Very Reverend Mother, Her Duchal Serene Highness. Dr. Hortense Sussudio Fuuckerfaaster

    July 26, 2012 at 4:39 pm

    in a way romney is right. forget that he is a politician, just think about how england was able to conquer the world by being bigger scumbags than anyone else. no one wants to admit it, and romney is being flamed for alluding to it, but on a scumbag to scumbag level, romney is trying to relate.

    speaking of, i was trying to read some science articles. man you can really tell that science journalism is the autistic redheaded stepchild of the recognized university discipline panoply. its like how the church in pre-enlightened europe was the catch-all for the misbegotten scions of the noble ranks.

    seriously, with science journalism in the utterly incapable hands of smallpeter principled stewardship, is there any doubt why the forces of ignorance, superstition, and organized chicanery rule our public policy anywhere scientific understanding might provide a needed bulwark?

  116. 116.

    Tom Levenson

    July 26, 2012 at 4:39 pm

    @pragmatism: Thx. Brain bubbles. Or rather, drunk on alliteration. But now fix’t

  117. 117.

    bemused

    July 26, 2012 at 4:40 pm

    I’m wondering how our intrepid US press is coping with Mitt giving them the cold shoulder while watching the UK press properly rip Mitt to shreds in just one day that they couldn’t/wouldn’t do in over a year.

  118. 118.

    Villago Delenda Est

    July 26, 2012 at 4:41 pm

    @kay:

    These aren’t gaffes, they’re put-downs, and Romney does this constantly.

    He doesn’t realize how his put downs are annihilating the minuscule Q rating he already had.

    I’m convinced the AI cannot help it, his staff is slowly going insane, knowing that the are part of a team that is losing and the nomination isn’t actually his yet. He’s still presumptive at this point.

  119. 119.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    July 26, 2012 at 4:41 pm

    “Blimey! This Romney bloke is stupid. Or is he just drunk?” — Paul Gascoigne

  120. 120.

    Jay C

    July 26, 2012 at 4:42 pm

    @SteveinSC:

    Well, that was a degree in English, obviously NOT a degree in British…

  121. 121.

    Bobby Thomson

    July 26, 2012 at 4:42 pm

    @BGinCHI: These guys would beg to differ.

  122. 122.

    tamied

    July 26, 2012 at 4:44 pm

    @beltane: I think he’s actually an alien that has put on a Romney suit.

  123. 123.

    trollhattan

    July 26, 2012 at 4:45 pm

    @bemused:
    I’m resigned to believing they’ll poke around the cushions for uneaten peanut packs while the others do their jobs. It’s a long campaign, for Pete’s sake.

  124. 124.

    NonyNony

    July 26, 2012 at 4:45 pm

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    I’m convinced the AI cannot help it, his staff is slowly going insane, knowing that the are part of a team that is losing and the nomination isn’t actually his yet.

    Do you think that Romney’s team really thinks he’s doing anything wrong?

    I’d be surprised if he had anyone on his team who was that critical of what they’re doing. He hasn’t shown himself to be a man that surrounds himself with advisers who give him advice he doesn’t want to hear. He’s shown himself to be the guy who surrounds himself with people who think like he does and will say “YES” when he wants them to say yes.

    They probably really do think he’s doing an awesome job. I’ll bet they have properly tweaked poll numbers based on their projections for turnout that prove he’s scoring big points everywhere he goes and that Obama’s campaign team is being left in the dust.

  125. 125.

    kay

    July 26, 2012 at 4:45 pm

    Also, the horse quote is hilarious. It’s completely in keeping with Bain and everything else.

    Romney loved talking about the horse as long as the horse put his family in a sympathetic and politically beneficial light.

    Now he’s retroactively retiring from dressage. He’s not even going to SEE that horse, let alone actively manage it!

  126. 126.

    Mino

    July 26, 2012 at 4:46 pm

    @The Right Honorable Member for, the Very Reverend Mother, Her Duchal Serene Highness. Dr. Hortense Sussudio Fuuckerfaaster: But the English were a set of scumbags capable of being embarrassed.

    Republicans/Tea Baggers, not.

  127. 127.

    Tonal Crow

    July 26, 2012 at 4:47 pm

    Shh! We have secretly replaced the Republican nominee with a robot made of sand and ground glass. Let’s see whether the American electorate can tell the difference!

    —
    Tag: Romney’s worse than Sarah Palin.

  128. 128.

    Mino

    July 26, 2012 at 4:47 pm

    @kay: I hope the American press can get him on tape watching the horse after being such a jerk to his wife about it.

  129. 129.

    redshirt

    July 26, 2012 at 4:47 pm

    @tamied: Remember when Kodos and Kang ran for office? Yeah, like that.

    “My fellow Americans. As a young boy, I dreamed of being a baseball; but tonight I say, we must move forward, not backward; upward, not forward; and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom!”

  130. 130.

    Villago Delenda Est

    July 26, 2012 at 4:47 pm

    @NonyNony:

    Oh, that comment belongs to me.

    I have this naive notion that Rmoney’s campaign staff is made up of actual political operatives, and not Mormon yes-men.

    Which is a bad on my part.

    To recap, your point is well taken.

  131. 131.

    the Conster

    July 26, 2012 at 4:48 pm

    @beltane:

    Southern New Hampshire is full of angry white trash ex-Massachusetts fucktards who are tribally Republican. The northern tier of New England is way more independent – they appreciate the services they get and are into community, and aren’t angry haters as a rule. I don’t think anyone in New England who was awake during Romney’s tenure in Massachusetts could name a single reason to cheer for him.

  132. 132.

    Jager

    July 26, 2012 at 4:48 pm

    @homerhk: That’s all he’s got!

  133. 133.

    Tonal Crow

    July 26, 2012 at 4:50 pm

    @redshirt:

    @beltane: Needs OS upgrade.

    My gawd don’t touch the firmware! Don’t you remember what happened the last time we tried that?

    —
    Tag: Romney’s worse than Sarah Palin.

  134. 134.

    the Conster

    July 26, 2012 at 4:52 pm

    @kay:

    Good point. I recently read a quote of his that said he’d use McKinsey to choose his cabinet, so you know that’s who he’d blame for anything going wrong.

    Here’s that quote. It shocked Murdoch!

  135. 135.

    trollhattan

    July 26, 2012 at 4:53 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est:
    Don’t you suppose they accidentally hired a sprinkling of qualified folks, at least one of whom will write a tell-all campaign book? Of course if they want to keep receiving those sweet paychecks, they’ll keep their yaps shut ’til November.

    This fiasco reminds me very much of the Whitman California governor campaign, only with less Pete Wilson.

  136. 136.

    pseudonymous in nc

    July 26, 2012 at 4:53 pm

    @NonyNony:

    Do you think that Romney’s team really thinks he’s doing anything wrong?

    The US surrogates have been saying that foreign press coverage doesn’t matter, which is rich, considering that the intent was clearly to show Rmoney looking comfortable alongside foreign leaders, and the travelling US press has been shut out. As others have said, let’s see whether the US press shies away from acts of journalism.

  137. 137.

    kay

    July 26, 2012 at 4:55 pm

    @Mino:

    It’s typical though.

    Who outsourced? His colleagues at Bain, not him.

    Who destroyed records after the Utah Olympics?
    His former co-workers, not him.

    Whose fancy horse is that? Not his!

  138. 138.

    Hill Dweller

    July 26, 2012 at 4:55 pm

    The WH rubs salt in Willard’s wounds:

    White House Spokesman Jay Carney said, “In keeping with our special relationship, the president also made it clear that he has the utmost confidence in our close friend and ally, the United Kingdom, as they finalize preparations to host the London Olympics.”

  139. 139.

    Smiling Mortician

    July 26, 2012 at 4:55 pm

    @Tonal Crow:

    Tag: Romney’s worse than Sarah Palin

    I keep reading this as a quote from a Romneyspawn (isn’t one of the sons named Tagg?) which makes it doubleplus amusing. Also, what is it with Republicans naming their sons with one-syllable common nouns that start with T?

  140. 140.

    Culture of Truth

    July 26, 2012 at 4:56 pm

    @NonyNony: Your point is well taken, but they do capable of realizing when optics are bad, explaining Rafalca’s hooves sticking out from under that double-decker, looking much like when Dorothy and her house dropped in on the wicked witch

  141. 141.

    Elliecat

    July 26, 2012 at 4:56 pm

    @kay:

    Too, they’re RIGHT about London versus Salt Lake City. It WAS easier in Salt Lake City.

    Cameron was rude to say SLC is “the middle of nowhere,” though. He should have simply said it was the $1.5 billion taxpayer bailout that made it easier.

  142. 142.

    trollhattan

    July 26, 2012 at 4:59 pm

    @Smiling Mortician:
    I keep reading it, “Romney’s horse is Sarah Palin.”

    Nayyyyy.

  143. 143.

    Tonal Crow

    July 26, 2012 at 5:01 pm

    @Smiling Mortician:

    Tag: Romney’s worse than Sarah Palin

    I keep reading this as a quote from a Romneyspawn (isn’t one of the sons named Tagg?) which makes it doubleplus amusing.

    Please steal it, if you would, and use it as much as you can. I’m hoping to make it as prominent on Google as the proper definition of “Santorum”.

  144. 144.

    Maude

    July 26, 2012 at 5:01 pm

    @Hill Dweller:
    Ouch. Nicely done.

  145. 145.

    Roger Moore

    July 26, 2012 at 5:02 pm

    @Comrade Dread:

    Yes, but aside from the law, a rich literary tradition, the industrial revolution, and economics, what have the British ever done for us?

    They did give us our native language, or does that fall under “a rich literary tradition”?

  146. 146.

    redshirt

    July 26, 2012 at 5:04 pm

    @Roger Moore: Lies! Every American knows English is as old as the Bible and was created by God hisself – knowing that America would be the promised land he prophesied! Hallelujah!

  147. 147.

    Citizen_X

    July 26, 2012 at 5:06 pm

    @Elliecat:

    Cameron was rude to say SLC is “the middle of nowhere,” though.

    Rude, maybe, but have you ever been to Utah?

  148. 148.

    Tonal Crow

    July 26, 2012 at 5:06 pm

    @Roger Moore: The British gave us common law, including judges to interpret the law and juries to determine guilt or innocence. The latter, despite many shortcomings, is a vital (and much underappreciated) bulwark against tyranny, especially when jurors know and exercise their powers.

    —
    Tag: Romney’s worse than Sarah Palin.

  149. 149.

    Mike E

    July 26, 2012 at 5:07 pm

    Hey London, just so you know, we’re ashamed the GOP candidate for president of the United States is from Texas Michigan France Utah Massachusetts Mexico Anglo-Saxony.

  150. 150.

    ChrisNYC

    July 26, 2012 at 5:07 pm

    No one’s going to see this (and maybe it’s come up already) but:

    http://www.buzzfeed.com/andrewkaczynski/mitt-romney-issued-comically-bizarre-cartoon-mitt

    The SLC Olympics made pins with Mitt’s face on them. And stuff like “We love you Mitt.” So so weird.

  151. 151.

    sneezy

    July 26, 2012 at 5:10 pm

    “it doesn’t make things that people in the rest of the world want to buy”

    A little googling suggests that UK exports per capita are about 1.7 times those of the US.

  152. 152.

    Mino

    July 26, 2012 at 5:10 pm

    @the Conster: Here’s a fill in on how it all fits:

    http://www.dailykos.com/story/2012/01/09/1053013/-If-Elected-Romney-Would-Hire-McKinsey-or-Bain-to-Reorganize-The-Federal-Government

    A well developed diary.

  153. 153.

    Calouste

    July 26, 2012 at 5:15 pm

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    “Blimey! This Romney bloke is stupid. Or is he just drunk?”—Paul Gascoigne

    If even an expert in both disciplines like Paul Gascoigne can’t tell the difference, you are in real trouble.

  154. 154.

    Bobby Thomson

    July 26, 2012 at 5:15 pm

    @homerhk: Or in other words, a dickhead.

  155. 155.

    The Ancient Randonneur

    July 26, 2012 at 5:17 pm

    Boris bringing the awesome: “I hear their is a guy Mitt Romney … “ That video is going to be making the rounds.

  156. 156.

    Calouste

    July 26, 2012 at 5:18 pm

    @Elliecat:

    Cameron was rude on purpose, in reply to Romney’s assholiness. It’s not a coincidence that Cameron’s buddy Boris was subsequently mocking Romney in Hyde Park.

  157. 157.

    Culture of Truth

    July 26, 2012 at 5:24 pm

    Romney had moved on by the time that book was written.

  158. 158.

    SRW1

    July 26, 2012 at 5:27 pm

    @beltane:

    I don’t recall Prince Charles throwing around gratuitous insults every place he goes.

    Every person in the realm knows that this is Prince Philip’s job.

  159. 159.

    Mino

    July 26, 2012 at 5:29 pm

    BTW, Netanyahu is already saying they never held hands, much less kissed.

  160. 160.

    Greed Is God

    July 26, 2012 at 5:31 pm

    Spinal Tap’s final tour went better than this.

  161. 161.

    Davis X. Machina

    July 26, 2012 at 5:31 pm

    @Calouste:

    Cameron was rude on purpose

    “A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone’s feelings unintentionally.” Oscar Wilde.

  162. 162.

    the Conster

    July 26, 2012 at 5:36 pm

    @Mino:

    Bookmarked in my browser, thanks. Unfuckingreal.

  163. 163.

    Catsy

    July 26, 2012 at 5:39 pm

    @pseudonymous in nc:

    A foreign visitor hasn’t prompted this much support for Tory leaders since the Luftwaffe.

    You win the internets for today.

  164. 164.

    scav

    July 26, 2012 at 5:40 pm

    And for all the REAL ‘Mercans do-en kare ’bout nun dat For-eign Press papers, there do suddenly seem to be a lot of red-meaters clogging up the comment sections at The Guard and whinging on twitter.

  165. 165.

    Ash Can

    July 26, 2012 at 5:41 pm

    “We attempted to reach Mr. Romney’s campaign managers for their comments on their candidate’s first day abroad. However, the person who answered the phone was inebriated to the point of incoherence, and from what we could gather from his slurred remarks, he was the only one in the office who was even conscious at that point.”

  166. 166.

    Greed Is God

    July 26, 2012 at 5:42 pm

    Yes, but what does Sully think?

  167. 167.

    canuckistani

    July 26, 2012 at 5:48 pm

    @Tom Levenson:

    If HST were alive today, he’d ride a Speed Triple. But the Black Shadow is awesome. The British do have a talent for bikes.

  168. 168.

    Mino

    July 26, 2012 at 5:58 pm

    @Ash Can: Good snark, that is.

  169. 169.

    Tom Levenson

    July 26, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    @canuckistani: Didn’t Hunter buy a Triumph when he was riding with the Hells Angels? Part of his problem with the boys, as I recall.

    I’m not absolutely sure about the marque, and I’ve long since lost my hard cover first edition of the book, but I do remember he made the unforced error of not buying American.

  170. 170.

    LanceThruster

    July 26, 2012 at 6:26 pm

    “Mitt’s just this guy, ya know?” ~ Zaphod Beeblebrox

  171. 171.

    Robin G.

    July 26, 2012 at 6:29 pm

    @SteveinSC:

    Didn’t I read somewhere that Romney graduated with a degree in English from BYU?

    So did Stephenie Meyer, author of the Twilight Saga.

  172. 172.

    trollhattan

    July 26, 2012 at 6:43 pm

    @Tom Levenson:

    BSA Lightning, if memory serves (and memory is nothing, if not suspect WRT HST).

  173. 173.

    Phoenician in a time of Romans

    July 26, 2012 at 6:49 pm

    @quannlace:

    Well, the Channel *was* what kept the Nazis out of London – after the BEF was sent reeling into Dunkirk, the Wehrmacht were the undisputed masters of Europe. They’d broken the French and British armies combined. If there had been a land connection between the UK and Europe, they’d have been all over it.

    Of course, it wasn’t JUST the Channel – it was the ships and aircraft protecting it. They fought and died to ensure the Germans couldn’t control that stretch of water, and if Germany had been a bit smarter, they might well have lost.

    Much as I loathe the bastard, I’d have to rate Romney’s comment “And if it hadn’t been separated from the continent by water, it almost certainly would have been lost to Hitler’s ambitions” as accurate.

  174. 174.

    Tom Levenson

    July 26, 2012 at 7:02 pm

    @trollhattan: Yup. That sounds right. (More bourbon plz.)

  175. 175.

    Tom Levenson

    July 26, 2012 at 7:06 pm

    @Phoenician in a time of Romans:

    Much as I loathe the bastard, I’d have to rate Romney’s comment “And if it hadn’t been separated from the continent by water, it almost certainly would have been lost to Hitler’s ambitions” as accurate.

    Nah. It’s counterfactual horseshit. If Britain had been a continental power it would have had (a) a wholly different history and (b) even if you could somehow have created a distinctly British lump on the western edge of the continent it would have had a very different military than the one that confronted Hitler in France in 1940. Who knows when/whether anything like the military engagement that took place in reality could have occurred if Germany faced two France-scale land armies on its western front.

    If my dog were a dove it could fly. But that ain’t the point, innit?

    I rate Mitt’s remark as obtuse — and incapable of being either accurate or inaccurate.

  176. 176.

    gelfling545

    July 26, 2012 at 7:10 pm

    @schrodinger’s cat: It gives me pause to think that McCain may well have had actual reasons for picking Palin – given what he had to choose from. More than that, actually, it scares silly to think that this is the best the GOP has to offer.

  177. 177.

    slightly_peeved

    July 26, 2012 at 7:15 pm

    @Elliecat:

    Considering what Dave and Boris put up with daily from British comedians, journalists, and their opponents (all three of which can be far more savage than their American counterparts, barring all the ‘the president is near’ stuff ) weak shit like Romney’s been putting up is going to get knocked down pretty fast. Especially when it comes from an ignorant colonial chav like Romney.

    If you want to see how robust British insulting gets compare the daily show to mock the week or some of the other news comedy shows.

  178. 178.

    slightly_peeved

    July 26, 2012 at 7:21 pm

    @Tom Levenson:

    Britain without the channel isn’t Britain. That strip of water defines Britain, from the Roman times on. It’s a ridiculous statement, as well as an incredibly insulting one.

  179. 179.

    Tom Levenson

    July 26, 2012 at 8:06 pm

    @slightly_peeved: yup.

  180. 180.

    TheMightyTrowel

    July 26, 2012 at 8:16 pm

    @slightly_peeved: Archaeologist here. you are wrong. The channel, as such, really only gained the prominence it has now in the modern era after Britain lost its continental holdings. Southern England was pretty much constantly in contact with Brittany and Nord pas de Calais/Belgium to the point that THEY WERE THE SAME COUNTRY into the early modern period and show few if any material cultural distinctions.

    Northern and western Britain are a different story. To all intents, northern and western Britain should not be considered British like southern England until the modern era (and if you ask the Scots, the Welsh and my Cornish separatist boss still shouldn’t be)

  181. 181.

    schrodinger's cat

    July 26, 2012 at 8:47 pm

    The beltway media is too deferential, especially to Republicans. I hope the Brits skewer Romney.

  182. 182.

    Phoenician in a time of Romans

    July 26, 2012 at 9:06 pm

    Nah. It’s counterfactual horseshit. If Britain had been a continental power it would have had (a) a wholly different history

    Yeah, that’s true, but it’s a second-order effect – to a first approximation, Romney’s statement was right. The Channel was the wall on which the RAF stood and broke the German momentum.

    While Operation Sealion gets argued ad nauseum on AH sites, I did run into this interesting argument – http://www.freewebs.com/heinkill/alternatehistory.htm.

    Hmmm – I may dust off ‘Hearts of Iron II’ again soon…

  183. 183.

    Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason

    July 26, 2012 at 9:20 pm

    @Tom Levenson</a

    Didn’t Hunter buy a Triumph when he was riding with the Hells Angels?

    BSA Lightning, IIRC.

    /former Triumph owner/

    sigh. Only a Tiger Cub, though, perhaps the reason I survived the experience.

  184. 184.

    HobbesAI

    July 26, 2012 at 10:51 pm

    If Britannia had not been separated from the continent by the Channel it surely would have fallen to Gaius in 40AD.

  185. 185.

    Phoenician in a time of Romans

    July 26, 2012 at 11:47 pm

    @HobbesAI:

    If the Channel hadn’t existed, the British would have been conquered by the French Normans, and their monarchy would have wound up taken over by German Saxons.

    Oh, wait…

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