(Tom Toles via GoComics.com)
__
Looks like we might actually be at one of those rare windows where, despite the “national narrative is wired for Republicans” bias, the media Villagers decide that the Conventional Wisdom will now be that Mitt Romney is a big old LUZER. He, or his handlers, have teed off the infotainment sector — “Greta Van Susteren wrote, ‘There has been no press access to Governor Romney since we landed in Poland. We (press) are in a holding pattern (I can’t help but feel a bit like the press is a modified petting zoo since we are trapped in a bus while Polish citizens take pictures of us.)'” — while signally failing to impress the politics-as-horse-race wiseguys like Chris Cillizza:
“I find this entire trip borderline lunacy,” said one senior Republican strategist granted anonymity to speak candidly. “Why on earth is he seeking to improve his foreign policy cred when there will not be a single vote cast on that subject?”
Ed Rogers, a longtime Republican operative, was more measured, but acknowledged that the trip was something short of a unqualified success.
“Romney abroad is the same as Romney at home,” said Rogers. “His performance is uneven at times, but overall, pretty good.” Added Rogers: “Let’s face it, Romney can’t win, but Obama can lose.”
I’m sure President Obama’s re-election team is doing its deft best to cement the “Romney can’t win” CW in the impressionable minds of the crucial low-information, bandwagon-jumping voter. Meanwhile, those of us on the Democratic side of the aisle get to enjoy the show. John Cassiday at his New Yorker Rational Irrationality blog:
… The touchdown of Romney’s campaign plane on American soil on Tuesday afternoon brings to a merciful end one of the most star-crossed foreign ventures since June, 1777, when General Burgoyne and his army of redcoats marched out of Quebec and headed for the Hudson Valley. Like Burgoyne’s ill-fated journey, which ended in surrender to the American colonists at the Battle of Saratoga, Romney’s trip was ill-conceived, poorly executed, scarred by miscommunication, and, ultimately, it had the effect of encouraging the enemy.
Fittingly, it ended in farce, with Team Romney being obliged to apologize for a press spokesman shouting “kiss my ass” to reporters, following a wreath-laying ceremony at one of Poland’s most revered sites, the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier in Warsaw. Yet as Romney headed for the airport, one of his top strategists, Stuart Stevens, insisted (presumably with a straight face) that the six-day jaunt had been “a great success.” It’s amazing what people will say when they are on the sort of hefty financial retainer that political consultants receive….
Stevens also defended Romney’s fitness to be President, saying, “I think that given his background, his stature, what he’s accomplished, his age, that he is someone that people think is qualified and ready to be president.” His age? When a campaign strategist is reduced to citing how long his man has been alive—sixty-five years—as a reason to vote for him, you know something is terribly amiss…
Matt Miller, a writer so blandly centrist as to be invisible in the room-temperature beige gruel of the Washington Post editorial pool, rises briefly to the top of the ‘most popular’ bar with a neologism:
… Traditional adjectives just won’t do. When Romney thoughtlessly trashed British Olympic preparations, even his allies were left with a sense that modern English wasn’t equal to the occasion. (“It’s unbelievable, it’s beyond human understanding, it’s incomprehensible,” said my Post colleague Charles Krauthammer on Fox News, before adding, “I’m out of adjectives.”)
When Romney says “corporations are people, my friend” or okays the explanation that he “retroactively resigned” from Bain, the mind reels, but the mouth comes up short.
What’s the right new word? “Mitticism” might be a serviceable noun, but it feels quaint and obscure. “Mittgaffe” has a fun ring redolent of “McNugget,” but it still misses. After all, we’re talking about a state of mind, a way of thinking (or not thinking), that goes beyond any single misstep.
No, sometimes only a punchier adjective will do.
I propose “Mitticulous.”
Mitticulous means that what Romney does is thoroughly ridiculous yet in its own way very precise — that is to say, Romney is literally “meticulous” in his inanity…
***********
Apart from toasting confusion to our enemies, what’s on the agenda for the evening?
Bort
They aren’t afraid of him. That’s the problem. Bush and Rove could be mean to reporters and they accepted it like whipped dogs. They even learned to like it in a masochistic fashion.
TheRealRandiego
Currently watching the “Powr4Patriots” ad video, just for kicks.
Somebody need to explain marketing to this guy, in other words – don’t bore the sh*t out of your audience.
He still hasn’t gotten to his pitch after 5 minutes into this video. Lots of fear and smear though!
jl
I wonder why they don’t fear him. He is the symbolic head of the insane rump that is left of the GOP. He has lots of money and lots of friends who have money.
Off top of my head, I would guess that Rove and Dub could stand their ground on something, no matter how insane or false, and dare the reporters to go where they did not want to go: into facts and reasonable man type judgments about reality (which is bad for the corp media business model). So, they did the dance.
Mitt will fold and say whatever he thinks he needs to say to get out of a situation easily and quickly.
Plus, better balance of carrot and stick with Rove and Dub.
With Mitt, the stick is the carrot, and it is a very limp carrot. (note sure that makes any sense, but it sounds cool, and vaguely insulting, so I will go with it.)
Patricia Kayden
What was supposed to be the purpose of Romney’s world tour? I assume that most people who are going to vote for him could care less about Europe. He probably should have skipped England and Poland and gone straight to Israel. At least Rightwingers profess a deep love and affection for Israel, so that trip made sense.
j
Has anybody heard that the “Pepper Spraying Cop” got fired yesterday?
http://www.sacbee.com/2012/08/01/4679893/officer-at-center-of-pepper-spraying.html
Pike got the spike!
dmsilev
@jl:
Part of it may be that he really is only the *symbolic* head of the party right now. He certainly isn’t leading the way on any political or policy initiative, he’s not the head of any mass popular movement, and if he goes down in flames he isn’t going to be the head of some Politburo enforcing ideological correctness.
If you’ve reached the conclusion that Mitt is very likely going to lose the Presidency, what is there about him to be afraid of?
MattF
It’s not mentioned much, but Romney only just edged out a parade of lunatics and morons in order to get the nomination. I don’t think reporters have completely forgotten all that.
cyntax
Mitticulous is pertty good–much as hate to agree with anyone in the WaPo editorial pool.
jl
@dmsilev: Good points. Here is to putting the Rictus into the Mitticulous campaign! Huzzah.
Xboxershorts
What did you expect. He’s a Mittwit through and through
cathyx
@Patricia Kayden: What was the purpose of Romney’s trip? To let all the countries he’s visiting know that he has their rich people’s interest at heart if they would only donate to his campaign to help him win. Then he will make policy that will get them richer.
jl
@Xboxershorts: I think you just produced the turning point in the campaign. You may have saved the country. Thnx in advance.
Martin
@Patricia Kayden:
That’s the problem. In order to win, he needs to convert the people that aren’t going to vote for him – or don’t know if they are or not. There’s a large block of people that still are connected to places outside of the US that care about such things.
D. Mason
@jl: Sounds like he doesn’t know how to work a carrot. Makes sense, he has people for that.
jl
@cathyx:
” What was the purpose of Romney’s trip? ”
To do a purely symbolic and contentless ceremonial trip through three countries specifically picked for super easy campaign wins that any nitwit should be able to pull off in their sleep.
But Romney is no nitwit, he is a Mittwit, and couldn’t handle it.
Yeebus, when you think about it, amazing. I bet most of the commenters here could do a much better job, even if they would be throwing up in their mouths and praying for their immortal souls (or FSM aftersauce) while they BS and spewed garbage.
Except UK, anybody should have been able to pull of UK. Tunch and Lily could have pulled off UK, just be sitting still for pics.
Raven
@D. Mason: carat
John Cole
Great line.
D. Mason
@Raven: Oh, he can work a carat like a tax loophole in the Caymans.
Litlebritdifrnt
I keep saying that I cannot believe that the race is as close as it appears to be, but then I remember that a huge chunk of the population will happily vote against their own best interests. Go figure.
linda
No matter how much in the tank the village seems to be, at heart they are mean middle school kids. If they see a weakness, they tease the weak kid till he wishes he were dead. Like in Cranbrook Academy.
Litlebritdifrnt
@cathyx:
As someone else pointed out today, all three countries he visited have “socialized” health care. Interesting.
gbear
If I may immodestly repost the Romney campaign haiku from last night’s thread:
Kiss my ass. Kiss it.
It’s a fucking holy place.
Have you no respect?
jl
@Litlebritdifrnt: Where could Mitt go to find a non socialized health care system, at least non socialized by the wingnut definition?
Paraguay? Chad? North Pole?
Edit: Of course, Mitt could have made a domestic tour of wingnut states, if he wanted health care system congruence with his fakey campaign schtick.
cathyx
@Litlebritdifrnt: Maybe Mitt will try to end all their oppressive, religion attacking, socialized medicine if he’s elected president.
jl
@gbear: Thanks. the real meaning and subtext is clear to me know.
NonyNony
Let’s all focus in on this little bit of beauty for a moment:
Look at it again:
This came out of the mouth of a Republican strategist who allowed his name to be printed alongside it.
Republican operatives don’t do things like that. Never after the primary is settled. It isn’t done. Republicans reward loyalty above all else – above being right, above basic competence, above family connections. Loyalty is the single most important characteristic for long term employability in the GOP.
And here’s a guy willing to fucking go ON RECORD saying that this race is Obama’s to lose. That Romney has to count on Obama stumbling to win it.
That is truly amazing. Maybe they caught him off guard. Maybe it was supposed to be an anonymous shiv off the record. But if it was a legit on record admission, I’m not quite sure what to make of it to be honest.
Turgidson
@Litlebritdifrnt:
Of course they do. Just about every industrialized country does, other than this one.
And Mittens probably won’t deign to visit any 3rd world countries unless he has to. He might get his $10k wingtips dirty, and he’s running for office, for pete’s sake.
geg6
What I wonder, based on the several likely voter polls (Q and CBS/NYT) out of PA, OH, and FL, is how they imagine any of this is playing with the 9-10% of those voters who are the only ones up for grabs. With 90-91% saying they have made up their minds and are set on their guy, how can they possibly think looking like an international Forrest Gump, allowing all kinds of crazy speculation about his taxes a la Harry Reid, and having the national press (with the exception of Ginny Thomas’ BFF Jan Crawford) sniping at and giving him wedgies will win the votes of that tiny fraction of undecideds? Undecideds tend to vote for who they think will win; it’s their nature to do that. I’m quite sure the debates won’t help him. What is their thinking? If I was Eric Fehrnstrom, I’d be suicidal right about now.
magurakurin
@Turgidson: exactly. The only place in the developed world that has a pure private system is Switzerland and that system is highly regulated to the extant that it might as well be a government program.
Mitt sucks. It’s over and it hasn’t even really begun yet.
Obama…it’s clobberin’ time!
Tonal Crow
I suggest celebrating Republicans’ mittstakes and anticipatory mittgrets by kicking in a few more bucks for Obama, the DCCC, and DFA.
Turgidson
@geg6:
Pray for shockingly bad jobs figures between now and election day.
Pray that Europe can’t keep their shit together for three more months and tanks the world economy in the fall.
Pray that Osama bin Laden isn’t really dead and releases a tape in late October?
Pray that Obama suffers massive head trauma and as a result hires Dick Morris and Mark Penn to run his campaign?
NonyNony
@jl:
Nowhere that Mitt would be willing to travel.
Honestly all he needed to do was not mention healthcare at all. Why bring it up? Was he not briefed that every single freaking country on his list has socialized medicine?
I mean really – how hard can this be. Don’t insult your host country, don’t bring up subjects where your host country is far to your left and even the conservatives in that country think your stance is a bit of reactionary idiocy, and don’t tell the press to fuck off. This is not rocket science – this is like the bare minimum of effort you need to run a campaign. Honestly even Newt “Douchebag” Gingrich could get through this level of basic competence.
Linda Featheringill
Why the Grand Tour? I assumed he wanted to collect a bunch of pleasant anecdotes, good pictures, and promises of friendship. Then he could display these while criticizing Obama’s foreign policy skills.
Except it didn’t happen that way.
I got the impression that actually dealing with people in other countries might be harder that Mitt thought it would be.
Violet
Like I’ve been saying, the horse race narrative is dead, but the media hasn’t figured it out yet. One of them will and then they’ll be asking, “Is it too late to replace Mitt?” and similar questions because they’ll have realized that chaos in the Republicans is better for ratings. They already don’t like Romney and the feeling is mutual. They aren’t inclined to do him any favors. Stories like “The Wimp Factor” in Newsweek is a forerunner.
Linda Featheringill
@Turgidson: #30
Lol! You’re right of course. It would require more than mere temporary insanity. It would take massive neuron destruction for this to take place.
geg6
@NonyNony:
I agree. It’s pretty stunning.
They know he’s gonna lose. They are distancing themselves, just like they did with Palin. No one with any real political savvy wants any part of Mittens. This says a lot. Amazing.
Liberty60
I’m chewing on the latest Quinnipiac poll showing that Obama’s proposal to raise taxes on the rich is a crowd-pleaser.
While not news to anyone who has been paying attention, it strikes me that if he wins, and can demonstrate that campaigning on the idea of RAISING taxes is a vote-getter, the the back will be proken of the Norquist machine.
MattF
@Linda Featheringill: Yeah, ‘dealing with people’ is not a strong point for the Mittster. “These autonomous sentient Eurasian bio-entities have a variety of surprising sensitivities!”
Baud
@Bort:
Mitt needs to start giving reporters nicknames. That’ll win them over.
NonyNony
@geg6:
It’s right up there:
Big shocking reveal – not a single member of the GOP clown car was going to be able to beat Barack Obama by being an excellent candidate for the presidency. Not a one of them.
The only way that Romney wins is by truly making this a referendum on the last 4 years AND by making the charge that the last 4 years are all Obama’s fault stick. If there’s even a hint that the majority of the blame should fall on Bush for creating it and the Republicans in the Congress for not working with Obama to fix it, Obama wins.
It didn’t have to be like this. The Republicans really should have had a lock on this year’s election with how bad unemployment remains. But they’re in crazytown now, so they have thrown away their shot at a sure thing.
gbear
Steve Benen makes a great observation:
Mitt doesn’t want to trouble his beautiful mind with anything about the real, functioning military. He just want to spout about how he’s going to use it without hesitation.
Turgidson
@NonyNony:
Mittens’s whole campaign is based on saying, over and over and over again, that Obama sucks. The content of his criticisms is of absolutely no consequence to him, as Steven Benen has been tirelessly documenting for months now. Just “Obama sucks” all the time. About everything. I mean the guy even answered a question about what he’d do as president with “the opposite of what Obama’s doing” as if it was some sort of brilliant stategery. He also has no actual policy proposals other than funneling trillions of dollars to the rich and doing whatever Bibi tells him to.
So I think in this one-track mind he and his campaign have, it seemed like a good idea to say “hmm your health care system is good compared to the shitty one Obama’s currently in charge of and thus responsible for the entire history of” without considering the implications of that comment.
It fit with his campaign message of fact-free Obama bashing, so he let it rip. I think it’s that simple.
Seebach
@NonyNony: You’re right. That is quite something. I was surprised myself to read it, but thank you for emphasizing it.
NonyNony
@gbear:
Jeebus fucking Keerist on a fucking goddman pogo stick.
He shits on the UK. Then he shits on the Palestinians. Then he shits on the press.
And, for a big finale, he takes a big goddamn dump on the soldiers stationed overseas and their families. Who apparently aren’t “real Americans”.
I swear to Grod if Romney pulls off a Mission Impossible rubber mask after the first debate and it’s Ashton Kucher telling us we’ve all been punked or Andy Kaufman explaining that he’s been working this joke for decades to get it just right, it would not be all that surprising to me anymore.
And his entire fucking campaign is in on it too. Astounding.
Baud
@gbear:
By contrast, this is how a real contender does it:
mainmati
@dmsilev: I agree and it’s mainly because his new-found espousal of rabid Tea Party radicalism rings utterly hollow coming from a Mormon aristocrat despite the fact that the Tea Party started out as an astroturf creation of the Koch Bros. and Faux News.
Also, he continually flip-flops and lies like a rug. Even the mouth-breathers get tired of that. No, Rmoney’s votes will come from Obama haters, not Rmoney’s lovers.
Linda Featheringill
@gbear:
Maybe we should be grateful that Romney didn’t go to Afghanistan.
Patricia Kayden
@j: Good to know. That was a rough video to watch.
Maude
@Liberty60:
36
And a knife in the heart of the Republican Mantra since Poppy Bush.
xian
@Turgidson: funny about Osama. The other day I had this paranoid thought that the Obama White House learned that Osama was already dead and that the Cheney regime knew it but had propped him up with fake tapes etc. as an enemy, and thus were in no position to expose the hoax.
Patricia Kayden
@gbear: Hahahaha! Hilarious. See Romney’s good for a laugh so he’s good for something.
Roger Moore
@Patricia Kayden:
England: remind people that Romney “saved” the SLC Olympics.
Israel: kiss up to Sheldon Adelson.
Poland: Show that he’ll waste billions of dollars on useless missile defenses.
All three: bring up wingnut memes about Obama stiffing our allies.
SiubhanDuinne
I just want to say about that cartoon: If Tom Toles would draw me an awesome dancing horse like that, I’d take up dressage tomorrow.
Roger Moore
@Litlebritdifrnt:
Sure. So does just about every developed country other than the USA. You’re going to have a hard time putting together a tour of our friends and allies that doesn’t involve visiting countries with socialized (compared to the USA) medicine.
ericblair
@NonyNony:
I was going to say that I find this hard to believe, but I guess I really don’t. Rombot and his minions have this corporate habit of talking openly about strategery, even in front of the targets of it, and expecting to be rewarded for their cleverness. Even if they believe this is true, for fuck’s sake of course nobody would want to admit it because it sounds pretty damn callous and unpatriotic and makes you look like a self-absorbed prick. So the Romney campaign just calls “real Americans” a bunch of callous, unpatriotic, self-absorbed pricks.
Again, isn’t there anyone here who can play this game?
Villago Delenda Est
@gbear:
Good to know that our military members and their families are not “real Americans.” I guess that veterans, too, are not “real Americans.” Only draft dodging gazillionaires are “real Americans.”
JoyfulA
@geg6: Romney’s supposed to be campaigning in Pennsylvania with Gov. Corbett shortly. That will make all the undecideds go for Obama, given Corbett’s approval rating.
Even my mother, who was Republican for the first 75 years of her life, called me up first thing this morning foaming at the mouth about Corbett because the paper had no letters to the editor attacking him today. And she’s still mad because as attorney general (and candidate for governor) he busied himself with prosecuting Democratic reps for enabling staffers to campaign on state time (as if the GOP wasn’t doing it, too) instead of investigating Jerry Sandusky. She wants Corbett indicted for being part of the coverup.
She hasn’t even gotten around to despising him for all the other crap he’s pulled as governor.
And Corbett’s going to show Romney around and urge everyone to vote for him!
Southern Beale
Mitticulous?
How about Mittastrophe.
SiubhanDuinne
@JoyfulA:
That’s gotta be one of the best throwaway lines I’ve ever seen.
JoyfulA
@SiubhanDuinne: She’s a genealogist. Her ancestors have all been Republican since the 1850s. What can I say?
Rick Santorum was the last straw.
amk
Who cares if the corrupt media mocks mitt or not ? When they do real journalism and start vetting mitt and his 24×7 lies/spins/distortions on tax-returns, policies, budget plans etc., then they might earn a smidgen of respect.
wrb
Hmmm…
“Mitticulous.”
causes images of Felix Unger to flash across my mind
which, which are followed by this phrase, “Bibi’s Bottom”
Weird that.
Catsy
I have to disagree with the choice of neologism. For anyone not already in on the joke, “Mitticulous” sounds almost indistinguishable from “meticulous”, which isn’t generally a bad thing to call someone. It doesn’t really have any punch or distinctiveness to it.
I would cast my vote for the noun “Mitticism”, personally. It’s much more distinct from the word it’s playing off of, and evokes the “Bushism”–a whole new class of fail that could easily go viral as an Internet meme.
geg6
@JoyfulA:
Yup. I know diehard GOPers who just despise Corbett. Their loathing is pretty shocking really. First, it was the selling out of the state to drillers who have hired almost no Pennsylvanians (preferring to ship in workers from Texas, Oklahoma, Louisiana, and Arkansas) and whose drilling leases have not brought the promised cash windfall to property owners (in fact, they have had their property drilled whether they agreed to it or not due to the rules he wrote). Then it was his obvious conflicts of interest in the Sandusky case. And now it’s the voter ID stuff, which looks more incompetent by the minute and is disenfrachising not just the blahs, but a lot of the elderly, which is a demographic that either includes them or their parents. 36% approval might be his high water mark the way he’s going. Maybe Corbett can get Mittens down to the same rating. One can only hope that the Obama 11 point lead can go up some with Corbett’s help.
catclub
@Linda Featheringill: If Obama did hit his head, Michelle and Biden step in to take his place and win by even more.
ksmiami
@Roger Moore: Pretty please – Can we fly Mitt to Somalia so he can truly show his Galtian brilliance… A girl can hope
JoyfulA
@geg6: Corbett’s also hiking taxes by so sharply cutting education, disabled and elderly support, etc., so that every lower level of government that now has to make up for those cuts has to increase taxes, and people have noticed. People are furious about his attempts to override local zoning on behalf of the frackers; who wants gas wells next to houses (and wells), in schoolyards, in front of city hall? I’m so glad there’s no gas near me (as far as I know).
It occurs to me that Corbett (and I hope Romney as well) has lost all votes from everyone who works at PennDOT and all the polling place workers.
TG Chicago
Ha! Cole should really start reading Anne’s posts.
Whoa! Was just about to post that when I saw Cole at #17. Double ha!
Nethead Jay
@JoyfulA: Your mother sounds wonderful :)
xian
@Violet: this sounds good but ignores the press’s financial incentives to flog a dead horse race metaphor and suck in that UNLIMITED CORPORATE CASH.
Old Dan and Little Ann
Testing.