Glendower to Hotspur:
I can call spirits from the vasty deep.
Hotspur to Glendower:
Why, so can I, or so can any man;
But will they come when you do call for them?*
Mitt Romney to the American people:
Romney spoke before a crowd of more than 1,000 at the Jefferson County Fairgrounds. He said he had a “presidential accountability scorecard” to help grow the U.S. economy.
The [Denver] Post said Romney pointed to energy independence, making sure the young have the skills to succeed, improving the U.S. trade system, cutting the national debt and championing small businesses.
If goals in those five areas are achieved, Romney said, it would create an estimated 12 million jobs, the Post reported.
I can create jobs, or so can any man or woman. But will the come when Mitt does call for them?
I. Think. Not.
*Henry The Fourth, Part I Act 3, scene 1, 52–58
Image: J.W.M. Turner, Storm at Sea, undated, before 1851.
Rusty
And then Prince Hal kills Hotspur and they all lived happily ever after… or at least retired to the tavern for some good ale.
Pappy G
One of my favorite lines in Shakespeare is in that scene –
HOTSPUR: …a plague upon’t – I have forgot the map!
Jim, Foolish Literalist
Let’s imagine we removed all restrictions on drilling and extracting. In the oil industry’s wildest fantasies, can the US achieve “energy independence”?
General Stuck
You know, I like to keep up with what the other candidate of the other party is saying day to day, during an election season, even if I don’t agree, and even if it pisses me off. Like GWB and sidekick Cheney in 2004.. Same with right wing pundits, that I spent a fair amount trolling, or just arguing on the few boards that didn’t have registration.
Not so much this go around. There has to be a scintilla of substance as related to belief, for it to compute in my reasoning brain areas. I just have nothing, when I hear Romney say something, of this or that variety. With the lemmings of the RWNM just lining up with the same nonsense. Nothing the man says is tethered to anything like a grounded belief system relative to being a president. It may be there, and ambition has made the man insane. But it is a vacuum, in deep space, where the Mittster resides, where no one can hear him scream. HELP MEEEEEE!!
Short Bus Bully
And IF frogs had wings they wouldn’t bump their butts when they jump.
MattMinus
So it’s:
energy independence (drill, baby,drill)
making sure the young have the skills to succeed (vouchers)
improving the U.S. trade system (gutting regulation)
cutting the national debt (destroying the safety net)
and
championing small businesses (tax cuts for the rich)
Truly, these are bold ideas!
Tonal Crow
It’s a simple 3-step plan!
1. Tout “presidential accountability scorecard”.
2. God appears and grants Romney 3 wishes (and 3 more ponies for him to ignore).
3. He fulfills his promise.
See, libtards?
—
Tag: Romney’s like Sarah Palin, but not as honest.
ThatLeftTurnInABQ
@Short Bus Bully:
__
He merely left out the part where Obama and a Democratic Congress are the ones who accomplish them, because God knows there is nothing that GOP has to offer in the way of policy on any of those issues that is going to do anything other than to drive us over a cliff.
LanceThruster
It will all work if we just clap louder.
Bokonon
Shorter Romney – “I have complete contempt for you! Free ponies for everyone! Hurry up and vote for me!!”
I’ll bet that when Romney talked about “energy independence”, he didn’t mention renewing the wind power production tax credit.
That’s because Romney’s platform calls for eliminating the wind production tax credit … which could literally cost thousands of jobs across Colorado’s green energy sector. This has been getting a reasonable amount of press locally -and a number of GOP politicians are distancing themselves from Romney’s position. Although Romney has still been polling surprisingly close to Obama in Colorado.
Although … a crowd of 1,000 is pretty weak for Jefferson County. Especially with advance notice and local media coverage. Michele Obama did nearly that well when she appeared at a local high school several weeks ago with less fanfare. What’s up here?
By the way … isn’t it funny how Romney is ordinarily all in favor of tax cuts and tax credits, but suddenly he gets all inconsistent here and makes this exception that specifically targets the wind power industry? And works against energy independence? Curious, eh? Can we detect the unsubtle intervention of the fossil fuel lobby, putting a hit on their rivals?
Sal
That is my favorite Shakespeare quote. Applicable all over the place.
quannlace
“‘Oh, Whistle, and I’ll Come to You, My Lad'”
A great ghost story by M.R, James.
General Stuck
@efgoldman:
This is the emission in a phrase, and what will embarrass the nation when it becomes clear in the closing days before the voting starts. The last president I got that vibe from was Richard Milhouse Nixon, and Nixon as a pure matter of retail politics, puts the clown shoes on Mitt. In other words Mitt won’t fool anybody, any of the time.
The only question is, whether the hatred for Obama will get enough misanthropes to get offin their couches and go vote when they normally wouldn’t bother, just to get the black out of their White House.
Tonal Crow
@Bokonon:
You libtards! I have to explain every single little thing to you like to a 3-year-old! When it’s a “tax cut” for “wind power”, it’s CRONY CAPITALISM! And when it’s a tax cut for coal, it’s GOOD FOR BIDNESS.
Understand finally, libtard?
—
Tag: Romney: like Sarah Palin, but with worse morals.
scav
If New Years Resolutions are achieved, we’d be a much sexier nation.
MBA speak always does put hypothetical goals in the past tense.
Grung_e_Gene
Romney – Bzzz I am not Obama aplogizing for USA and being all black and all. Vote for me I have distingusihed gray wing-tip hair. Bzzzzzz”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ End Communication~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
MikeJ
@Bokonon: I would guess Romney didn’t mention it because he doesn’t know he’s against the wind power credit. I doubt anybody told him what he believes on that issue.
Agoraphobic Kleptomaniac
This is their line? “hey Rmoney, how you gonna pay for all those tax cuts?”,
“Tax cuts are jobs!”
“nonono, that’s not what I said. The analysis shows that your cuts are unsustainable and will increase the deficit, yet you haven’t provided any additional information to your plan to dispute the analysis”
“Jobs.”
“jesus H. Kolob…”
“jobs.”
And somehow, through a glass darkly, this is a Presidential Campaign
Tonal Crow
@Grung_e_Gene: You forgot the
message block.
—
Tag: Romney: like Sarah Palin, but for Republican women.
Anya
Romney doesn’t care about how hard it is for you losers to put food on your family.
JPL
@MikeJ: There is always that retroactively thingy, that seems to work for him also.
Todd
They’ve got enough aggregate corporate earnings laying around in money bins for about 18 months’ worth of illusory conservative wonderfulness for public consumption, kinda like the mid 80s Reagan boomlet benefitted Wall Streeters in nice suits (but nobody else, save for movement boys). After the newest conservatard bubble inflates, they can get back to talking about investing social security in the casino.
Caz
I like your response to Romney’s plan: “Nope, it won’t work.” Lol.
Todd
They’ve got enough aggregate corporate earnings laying around in money bins for about 18 months’ worth of illusory conservative wonderfulness for public consumption, kinda like the mid 80s Reagan boomlet benefitted Wall Streeters in nice suits (but nobody else, save for movement boys). After the newest conservatard bubble inflates, they can get back to talking about investing social security in the cas!no.
Tonal Crow
@Agoraphobic Kleptomaniac: Watch for the Laffer Curve and “dynamic scoring” to make an appearance soon. Republicans are portals to an entire universe filled to the gills with bullshit.
—
Romney: Like Sarah Palin, but with gray hair and a tendency to lie more.
Agoraphobic Kleptomaniac
@efgoldman: In Romney’s america, that will be the Bishop’s Storehouse
Bokonon
@Tonal Crow:
Darn it, that’s right. I forgot. There is a “liberal’ economy and there is a “conservative” economy. And the liberal economy isn’t really part of America … so it doesn’t count. And it deserves whatever it gets. Tax it to death, blow it up, let the Chinese pick over its bones. Hah hah! It is all pretty funny. Laugh up, liberals!
Your modern GOP – all in favor of job creation and tax cuts. Except when they aren’t.
Jager
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: No, but the oil companies would make a shit ton of money! Wait, they already make a shit ton of money. Okay,they’d make a Mega-Shit-Ton of Money!
Anne Laurie
@efgoldman:
Heck, so did I, and I was barely five! One of my earliest dateable childhood memories is falling asleep on the couch the night of the election, watching the tiny black-and-white tv my parents had saved up to buy for just that purpose, since they were too galvanised to put me to bed…
pseudonymous in nc
@Caz: obvious troll is obvious.
Anya
@efgoldman: I was just being a bit nostalgic for a little bit of Bushism. Also, too reminding myself about the last time an out of touch entitled douchebag won the presidency.
Tonal Crow
@pseudonymous in nc: Not many people know that feeding trolls can make them swell up and explode. That wouldn’t seem to be a problem, except that the pieces grow into new trolls.
NotMax
Too good a read at the link to not also mention it on this thread.
Long, but wonderfully snippy, piece about following Mitt on the campaign trail. Description of him stooping to deal with the reg’lar folk:
Patricia Kayden
You make Henry the IVth appear cool. Never read it.
Romneybot 2.0 is now making big promises that he knows he can’t keep. Good luck with that.
Anya
@Caz: why don’t you explain to us how it will work. Educate us, oh wise one!
jl
I think it is terrible that these bogus “joke” liberal “economic studies” ignore the obvious Romney tax cut boom, that the Romney people won’t explain to anyone.
Wake up sheeples!
NotMax
@efgoldman
Heh. Nearly simultaneous posting.
Great minds and all that. :)
mclaren
As an indication of how completely American society is disintegrating, check out this Chris Hedges interview with Bill Moyers from just a few days ago.
“We stand on the verge of one of the bleakest periods in human history, when the bright lights of civilization blink out and we descend for decades, if not centuries, into barbarity.” — Chris Hedges
Or take a look at Eric Kraus’ recent dissection of the exponential decline of the West, here (pdf):
Mitt Romney is just a symptom of the deep cancer destroying America, the cancer of uncontrolled greed, of unlimited increase in corporate power, of “the pursuit of wealth, forgetting all but self” as Adam Smith wrote in the The Wealth of Nations in the 1770s.
jl
@Anya:
” why don’t you explain to us how it will work. Educate us, oh wise one! ”
I think that is a McCarthyite tactic against poor Mitt. And I think you should feel ashamed of yourself.
BGinCHI
Tom, if you compare Romney to the great and beloved Welsh rebel and prince again I’m not going to be able to help you.
the Conster
Romney is finally coming to grok how far in over his head he is, and his throwing a rod daily is a symptom of his dawning understanding that the world outside his Mormon bubble is way more complicated then he could have possibly imagined. He’s only ever been surrounded by rich men and Mormon yes men, and given orders. He’s never had to justify himself, and he doesn’t understand fully yet that he’s on a job interview and he’s failing. He’s not built for this, and by the time November comes, he may be spouting completely contradictory jibberish – not day to day, but minute to minute. I noticed on the news tonight that his hair has gotten blacker, except for those gray temples. He’s very, very uncomfortable with everything, including himself. It’s fun to watch.
Dennis SGMM
Davis X. Machina
@the Conster: I don’t care how uncomfortable he is, at 48%, I’ll take the over.
Referendum questions don’t have feelings or narratives or backstories.
The upcoming Presidential election is a referendum, plain and simple. Not on a single question, more like two or three, but still more of a referendum than any other election in our lifetimes.
Bokonon
@MikeJ:
Oh … don’t give Romney credit for being ignorant. He knows his position. The guy is a top-down control freak. And this part week, the GOP members in Congress actually united behind Romney’s position when they voted against continuing the wind production tax credit. That sort of coordination takes work … particularly when you see the GOP voting against continuing an existing tax credit (and Grover Norquist keeps conspicuously and mysteriously silent).
Strange, huh? Particularly when the GOP’s usual party line is that eliminating a subsidy or tax break, or letting one expire, is the SAME THING AS A TAX INCREASE.
All signs point to a deliberate political hit on wind energy. Mitt’s position is just part of that hit job.
jl
@Dennis SGMM: I like “goals”, and even better “five goals”. I eagerly await the “mileposts”. then the Powerpoint slides and the PERT charts.
I eagerly await Mitt going full management consultant in his pitch for this gig.
Anya
@jl: Mother of all McCarthyite tactics. Puts my feeble attempt to shame.
Mary G
I was at Costco yesterday and the guy who was helping to unload my cart was telling my cashier that he put off paying income tax until this month, and it’s so unfair that he is going to have to send the IRS $7,000 or $8,000.
He was ramping up a big tea party speech trying to impress her. I just wanted to pay for my tomatoes and toilet paper, so I said to him that if he was Mitt Romney he’d only have to pay 14%. He actually shuddered a little and said…
“That guy is too weird.”
Then the cashier said…
“Who’s Mitt Romney?”
Gobsmacked, I was.
Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn
Quasi topical:
gogol's wife
@Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn:
Hilarious!
jl
@Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn:
But Harry has ‘put up’ everything he has: some rich guy Bain investor calls ’em and says that, hey, that derned Romney paid no income taxes for years.
Why should Harry shut up?
Or, is Romney camp implying that they lost the returns and Harry found them in the dumpster?
Raven
@Mary G: They help you unload your cart there?
Roger Moore
@Dennis SGMM:
He just forgot to mention that the 1.2E7 jobs he’s going to be creating will be part time, pay minimum wage, and not be subject to workplace safety standards.
Bokonon
How come Romney is so sure of that 12 million figure? Is that really the number of people that they figure will be flipping burgers and mowing lawns and sweeping sidewalks when this low-tax nirvana is established, and Medicare and Medicaid are broken up and turned into block grant programs, and so on?
And … come to think of it, isn’t 12 million jobs a pretty modest number in a nation of over 300 million, over a four year term?
Phony numbers. Phony promises. Empty words, with a sinister shadow agenda waiting in the wings for implementation.
Calouste
So, 12 million jobs, in 4 years I assume? Is that even enough to keep up with population growth?
Roger Moore
@Davis X. Machina:
No, it isn’t. Romney wants to make it a referendum plain and simple, because that is his only real chance of winning. Obama is doing his best- and a fairly effective one, at that- to make it an actual campaign that’s about both candidates and how well they’d do the job. That’s the fundamental dynamic of the campaign. If it’s about Obama and only Obama, Romney has a chance of winning. If it’s about comparing Obama to Romney, Obama is going to win walking away.
Quaker in a Basement
Wait, what? Cut the debt? He’s not just promising to balance the budget, he’s claiming he’s going to run a surplus and pay down the debt?
While cutting taxes?
Pull the left one now, Mitt. You stretched the right one too long.
the Conster
@Davis X. Machina:
You keep saying that, and if it were a different Republican I would agree, but I think that Romney might be the worst candidate I’ve ever seen. He’s uniquely weird, unlikeable and secretive in a way that even the hard core nutjobs can’t abide. No one – NO ONE – likes him. By the time Obama’s team is done with him, he’ll be fetal because he has no intestinal fortitude, no guts, no soul. Trust me on this.
Calouste
@jl:
I assume Reid already has his answer ready: “I’ll shut up when Romney does what his dad did and every presidential candidate since: release his tax returns for 10 years.”
Caz
@pseudonymous in nc: “obvious troll is obvious.”?? What does that even mean? What’s a troll? I don’t understand why the response to any one of my substantive, meritorious comments is “you’re a troll!” as if that totally negates any point I might have. As if anyone has more of a right to post comments on here than me, simply because I’m about the only non-liberal to even read this blog ever, lol.
Roger Moore
@efgoldman:
Sadly, no.
Jay in Oregon
@Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn:
Remember how when the birther allegations started and the conventional wisdom was that people who are accusing Obama of not being born in the U.S. had to deliver their evidence or stop making such outlandish claims?
Yeah, me either.
Bruce S
Romney is starting to project Palinesque levels of disconnect from reality and incoherence. I honestly can’t remember a major presidential candidate this bad. Even Goldwater had more gravitas and personal charm, crazy as he was.
Jay in Oregon
@Roger Moore:
How dare you say that!
I see no evidence that Mittens wants people to earn even minimum wage.
If company towns were good enough for our great-grandparents…
Roger Moore
@Jay in Oregon:
I didn’t say that they’d pay today’s minimum wage.
burnspbesq
@Caz:
We’re still waiting for one. We’ve been waiting a very long time. You are testing our patience.
Josie
@Caz: I’m sorry. I missed the substantive meritorious comment. Where was it? I always look forward to reading substantive meritorious commentary.
burnspbesq
@Caz:
Right. “We have always been at war with the Tax Policy Center. Now it’s time for the Two Minutes Hate.”
PeakVT
@Calouste: 12M is more than enough to keep up with population growth. But there’s zero reason to think Romney could get the economy to perform that well.
Employment numbers are here if you want to browse them.
SiubhanDuinne
@efgoldman: That was a wonderful read. I want a cigarette now.
SiubhanDuinne
@jl:
Somebody needs to dummy up a Rmoney Bingo card fast ( in time for the RNC or even better before the VP announcement).
SiubhanDuinne
@efgoldman:
That’s so funny, because just a couple of years ago I saw David Petraeus give a huge PowerPoint presenta … Oh wIt.
SiubhanDuinne
@efgoldman:
That’s so funny, because just a couple of years ago I saw David Petraeus give a huge PowerPoint presenta … Oh wait.
Dennis SGMM
You guys are so pissy with the details. Here: the Romney administration will outsource the manufacture of 12 million shoe shine kits to China. They will be imported into the US at a profit for the the prophets and distributed at a modest cost. Bingo; 12 million jobs.
mainmati
Turner’s one of my most favorite artists. “Terror and Beauty, the Slave Ships” is an exquisite explosion of color and mist. But there are so many others. His vision and imagination captured in his paintings are totally awesome.
But to your point, Rmoney is all bullshit all the time. He has no tax plan that makes any sense – the Tax Policy Center gave him the benefit of the doubt and it was still a joke. He’s all about bullshit. his plan is to coast on the free-floating hatred of Obama by about 40% of the potential voting population because a) he’s black and b) he didn’t instantly cure the Great Recession and then hope bad times will makeup for the fact that he has nothing.
Oh and voter suppression.
Bill Arnold
@efgoldman:
“Moon Quakers” made me look. Interesting.
Bill Arnold
@Roger Moore:
Also, “every time you make a powerpoint edward tufte kills a kitten”
Another Halocene Human
@Anne Laurie: I can relate! I was for Mondale at the tender age of four because picked a woman for his running mate. Mondale was boring and calm and I couldn’t understand a thing he said in the debate.
GG
@Anne Laurie: I was 9 then, & have such a vivid memory of writing “Kennedy” in the snow on each step of the metal stairs on the back way up to our 2nd floor apartment, on the way back from school the afternoon after that election. And just being Happy. What scares me a bit is that I think actually remember my mother, who righteously loved Adlai Stevenson, waiting up for the inevitable result in ’56.
TenguPhule
If this Mittastrophe is Caz’s Idea of a Plan, then peanut butter and jelly must also be Caz’s ideal for fine dining.
TenguPhule
If you’re going to lie, obviously go big.
Yet another reason, Bush and Cheney need to be burned alive in a public square, and then their spouses and spawns of darkness thrown after for good measure.
LanceThruster
@pseudonymous in nc:
Now I feel really stupid because it wasn’t all that obvious to me. I thought it was more of a dignified response than Rmoney’s plan deserved…but totally accurate.
As Emily Litella might say…
“Never mind.”
LanceThruster
@TenguPhule:
PB&J can be nutritious enough to sustain a person. The Mittarded one’s plan would be more like pizza made from cardboard, red poster paint, and sawdust “cheeze”; that is… merely a placeholder in the belly where actual “food” is supposed to go.
LanceThruster
@Another Halocene Human:
I feel guilty that I didn’t warm to Fritz more at the time (though I did vote the Mondale/Ferraro ticcket). I’ve read some of his positions on church/state separation and thought they were brilliant (the basis for this view found here – http://www.religion-online.org/showarticle.asp?title=1429 – didn’t find what he actually wrote on it yet).
He is a good man.
“Today, the religion clauses of the First Amendment do not need to be fixed; they need to be followed.”
— Walter Mondale, Vice President, address to B’nai B’rith, Washington DC, September 6, 1984