Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I desperately hope that, yet again, i am wrong.

The republican caucus is covering themselves with something, and it is not glory.

Incompetence, fear, or corruption? why not all three?

“The defense has a certain level of trust in defendant that the government does not.”

If you voted for Trump, you don’t get to speak about ethics, morals, or rule of law.

The Giant Orange Man Baby is having a bad day.

Celebrate the fucking wins.

Someone should tell Republicans that violence is the last refuge of the incompetent, or possibly the first.

Come on, media. you have one job. start doing it.

If ‘weird’ was the finish line, they ran through the tape and kept running.

Republicans: “Abortion is murder but you can take a bus to get one.” Easy peasy.

I’d like to think you all would remain faithful to me if i ever tried to have some of you killed.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

Our job is not to persuade republicans but to defeat them.

This chaos was totally avoidable.

“Until such time as the world ends, we will act as though it intends to spin on.”

Trump’s cabinet: like a magic 8 ball that only gives wrong answers.

The desire to stay informed is directly at odds with the need to not be constantly enraged.

They spent the last eight months firing professionals and replacing them with ideologues.

This blog will pay for itself.

They traffic in fear. it is their only currency. if we are fearful, they are winning.

Their boy Ron is an empty plastic cup that will never know pudding.

Jack Smith: “Why did you start campaigning in the middle of my investigation?!”

If you tweet it in all caps, that makes it true!

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Excellent Links / You treat me like a stepchild

You treat me like a stepchild

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Via danah gaz (fka gaz), BooMan nails it:

Mitt Romney isn’t really a Mormon. He’s an atheist who only went along with his father’s faith so he could duck the Vietnam draft. He didn’t actually try to convert anyone when he was in France either. In reality, he spent all his time in Monte Carlo gambling and buying high-end hookers. When his daddy found out what he was doing, he made him come home and marry his high school sweetheart. Actually, he only made him marry her after the second time she got pregnant. The first time, they got an abortion. Then Romney started using some of the mafia connections he had made in Marseilles to import heroin. By the time he became governor, they were flying it straight into a secret airport they set up in the Berkshires. When one of the pilots started to talk, Romney had him killed.

Wait for it….

Now, if we started telling these stories to people, and a substantial percentage of the population started to actually believe these stories, and if congressmen humored and even encouraged the people who believed these stories, and if media figures talked about these stories, and if Congress actually had hearings about some of these stories, then Mitt Romney would know what it’s like to be treated like a Democrat.

Reader Interactions

90Comments

  4. 4.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    This is one of those things the older bespectacled folks call a “teaching moment”.

  13. 13.

    PurpleGirl

    I feel sorry for Vince Foster’s family… what they have to try and ignore all these years later as his name and fate is invoked again and again.

    OTOH, it does make the point very well.

  15. 15.

    amk

    Yup. The chicago thug along with that vegas crook is now making the rethug to wear that crappy shoe and the corrupt corporate doesn’t like it at all. Fuck’em.

  16. 16.

    Comrade Jake

    I just continue to be amazed by the fact that Harry Reid is the guy who has decided it would be a lot of fun to totally fuck with Romney in this way.

  18. 18.

    KG

    I don’t know… Do we have proof that any f that stuff is untrue? Do we know that Romney isn’t an atheist in his heart? And where’s his transcripts from his mission? And his tax returns including the 1099-G?

    Would it be irresponsible to speculate…?

  19. 19.

    Elizabelle

    Nancy Brinker out as CEO at Susan G Komen, although she’s taking a role in “revenue creation” and global strategy.

    NYTimes:

    Nancy G. Brinker, the founder of Susan G. Komen for the Cure, will leave her post as chief executive, and its president will resign, the group announced on Wednesday in the most significant leadership shake-up to follow its short-lived attempt to cut financing for breast cancer services provided by Planned Parenthood.

    Woo hoo. Took long enough.

  20. 20.

    David Koch

    You forgot how they found Romney with a live boy and dead girl after a three day bender in Vegas.

  21. 21.

    danah gaz (fka gaz)

    @KG: I never get tired of people wielding Cokie’s Law like a club against these jerks.

    Also, yes! – let’s see the long form documentation =)

    If I giggle any harder, I’m liable to pee myself.

  22. 22.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @KG:

    Do we know that Romney isn’t an atheist in his heart?

    I take him at his word if he said he’s not an atheist. I didn’t hear him address it and I can’t speak to his sincerity.

  24. 24.

    patroclus

    Hounding Vince Foster into suicide and then doubling down by blaming it on a murder by the Clintons was, indeed, one of the most vicious examples of the right wing machine ever. I was stunned when it happened and fully expected at least some remorse from Robert Bartley et. al….but it didn’t happen and they instead gloried in it. Andrew Jackson blamed his opponents for something similar involving the death of his wife, but it’s hard to think of another historic example which better exemplifies the utter depravity of the Republicans.

  25. 25.

    KG

    @Just Some Fuckhead: Now, I’m not saying he’s an atheist. I’m just saying, he says and does a lot of things that atheists say and do… But if he says he’s not an atheist, who am I to say he is?

  27. 27.

    David Koch

    @Comrade Jake:

    amazed by the fact that Harry Reid is the guy who has decided it would be a lot of fun to totally fuck with Romney in this way.

    I read a plausible explanation for this. Reid is a Mormon himself, and he was told by church officials that Romney refused to donate for 10 years because he wouldn’t make any contributions unless he got a write-off and he couldn’t get a write-off as long as he didn’t owe any taxes.

  28. 28.

    maya

    Before you all get carried away, this reverse double twist may very well be an unlawful copyright infringement of the GOP play book.

    I’m sure you’ll be hearing from Prince Reefus’ lawyers any minute now with the cease and desist order.

  30. 30.

    clayton

    Obama addressed the outrage of his day as a young man — apartheid.

    Romney, not so much.

  31. 31.

    scav

    @Elizabelle: Woo hoo. Took long enough

    Served nicely cold and worth the wait — especially as I assume this means the damage lasted (is lasting) longer than they once expected.

  33. 33.

    David Koch

    Romney holding investments for Osama bin Laden is gonna difficult to explain when it comes out.

  34. 34.

    Pen

    @Just Some Fuckhead: Not if you’re black, then you just get to be supreme servent for eternity or some bullshit like that. Or have they retroactively modified that policy since racism went out of style?

  36. 36.

    The Dangerman

    We should start a fringe political movement; instead of little pocket constitutions, we’ll wave our 1040’s. Our motto? “No representation without (proof of) taxation”.

  48. 48.

    JustAnotherBob

    @David Koch:

    “I read a plausible explanation for this. Reid is a Mormon himself, and he was told by church officials that Romney refused to donate for 10 years because he wouldn’t make any contributions unless he got a write-off and he couldn’t get a write-off as long as he didn’t owe any taxes.”

    A simpler version – Mitt tithed 10% of taxable income.

    On those years in which he screwed up and didn’t get everything written off….

  49. 49.

    danielx

    Yep. Fits right in with Mark Helperin’s anguish over crossing lines of decency, doesn’t it now?

    But…but…blowjobs! And not that a lot of Republicans are racists, but that imposter in the White House is a blackBLACKblacketyblack Islamososhulistfascist who is going to take away your guns and raise your taxes and give the money to brown people! (Did we mention he’s black?)

    Republicans being pissy over Democratic campaign tactics…after listening to decades of Republican horseshit, words cannot express the number of fucks I don’t give over their wails.

  52. 52.

    Spectre

    Christ this thread is stupid. Democrats (and republicans) both get a better treatment than pretty much any groups in the history of ever. Listening to the authoritarian sillies here, one would also forget that the democrats had contributed to several million dead people over the last few decades.

    I think Doug is just trying to recover from being owned by Bernard earlier.

  53. 53.

    danah gaz (fka gaz)

    @BGinCHI: You are a sick human being. The worst part is, I knew who “Max Power” was, but I had to google the “Blume twins”. And I’m not even into porn. Does this say more about me, or our culture?

    Either way, your comment… fuck. I’m no longer hungry.

  56. 56.

    danah gaz (fka gaz)

    @BGinCHI: My bad, I skimmed your comment and read Max Power where you said Max Fischer (ETA: I’m not sure why, maybe all the dead hooker, live boy stuff, etc).

    I’m sure that leads to an entirely different visual. FTR, I’ve never seen Rushmore

  57. 57.

    Anya

    Did you hear the one about Mitt Romney’s colony for Aborted Fetuses in the pacific? So a buddy of mine has a father in the military, who is in the higher ups of all intelligence soldiers in the Texas National Guard. So he gets a call from this recruiter who’s looking for well trained army men to work on an Island in the pacific and he asks him to sign with him without giving him a brief background on what he’s being signed up for, exept to say, he’ll be well compensated. Turns out he was hired to guard a little island in the pacific that has all the fetuses by Stericycle. Apparently These fetuses are used for cloning to creat little Mitts.

  58. 58.

    Turgidson

    Yeah, BooMan posted something we’ve all been thinking over here in the reality-based community for a long time now, but this campaign has just brought it to a new level.

    The Romney campaign is based on big lies, spews lies every day about the president and his policies, Romney lies about things in his background that are verifiable by fucking government documents, he’s now trotting out the fucking welfare queen schtick with a total fucking lie, he’s lying about the Ohio voting suit, and he has tens of millions of angry white man dollars saturating a dozen states’ airwaves with dirty fucking lies about the president and his party.

    The greatest hits of lies and smears Democrats have faced in the past decade or two are well-known.

    And this fuck Romney and the fucks who enable him like Halperin and Brooks and Kessler and even-the-liberal-Kevin Drum hyperventilate the SECOND Obama or anyone on his side brings a little bit of heat. They pontificate endlessly about how uncivil it is. They invent ways to accuse “us” of lying or stretching the truth even when the truth is firmly on our side – jesus, even signed SEC documents don’t discourage them from calling Obama a liar and ignoring Romney’s whoppers. Then they just wail about how unseemly it all is.

    FUCK. THEM. Where the fuck were they the past…oh, I don’t know, TWENTY FUCKING YEARS when anyone who dared to be alive while liberal was accused of hating America, being a Kenyan infiltrator, murdering Vince Foster, black fucking helicopters, Swiftboat fuckers for fucking lies, Max Cleland = Osama…Where the fuck were they with their bullshit outrage then? With their lips planted firmly on the asses of those propagating these filthy smears. Saying fucking nothing. Getting exactly not-outraged-at-all. They can take their phony outrage and cram it up their fucking asses.

  59. 59.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @Anya:

    Apparently These fetuses are used for cloning to creat little Mitts.

    I heard they were being processed into a rejuvenating face cream for Ann. We may never know the truth.

  62. 62.

    RadioOne

    I believe that most liberals would probably believe most of that (except for the murder plot on the pilot rat) if there were actually sources claiming it was true.

    I’m also getting tired of Frank Rich. He was on Piers Morgan tonight, and he has to be one of the most naive liberal pundits in America. He was one of Obama’s biggest cheerleaders in 2008, but the idea that electing Obama in 2008, and re-electing him in 2012, would by necessity involve engaging in political warfare, seems to be tainting his delicate white gloves.

  63. 63.

    RichardKanePA

    Romney officially gives more than the 10% expected of Mormons to his church. I think because he won’t lie to his church but will pretend to earn less to the US government. This isn’t a smoking gun but it comes close.

  64. 64.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @Anya:

    My source claims that this will make Rafalca immortal.

    Well of course Rafalca will be immortal. And the man that sat upon him was Death. And Hell followed.

  66. 66.

    seaboogie

    Seriously love this blog! The trenchant commentary often makes me laugh out loud, especially when y’all get on a roll…would make a great teevee network – what with politics, pets, gardening and food…would have to be in the three digit channels so we could let the f-bombs fly though – especially in the round-table political discussions – like PBS and NPR, but with more profanity and fewer totebags…

  72. 72.

    SatanicPanic

    @MikeJ: Ahh Enumclaw, the joke never gets old. I envy you hiking Rainier, looks beautiful, only seen it from Seattle.

  75. 75.

    Joey Maloney

    @Just Some Fuckhead:

    I heard they were being processed into a rejuvenating face cream for Ann. We may never know the truth.

    Nope. Vitamin supplement for Rafalca.

    Never mind, beaten to it by pretty much everyone.

  77. 77.

    Commenting at Balloon Juice since 1937

    I personally bought heroin from Mitt Romney in 2003 while he was governor. okay, I didn’t but someone I know did. or at least they read about it somewhere on the internet.

  79. 79.

    Nina

    Mitt was the driver in a car accident in which his boss’ wife was killed and the boss was grievously injured, back when Mitt was a missionary in France. Mitt took over and ran the French mission after that.

    These are verifiable facts, an unscrupulous person could make a hugely nasty rumor out of them.

  81. 81.

    Uncle Cosmo

    @danah gaz (fka gaz):

    Fuck the mythical “moral high ground”. There’s plenty of time to shower after the election.

    My sediments exzachary. I am soooo stealing this for my new sig line over at GOS. (With attribution o’cours.)

  82. 82.

    Judas Escargot, Acerbic Prophet of the Mighty Potato God

    Nothing offends the Village courtiers more than Obama & the Dems going off-script. Their status and their entire sense of self rides on the proverbial Game, and how they’re the ones ‘in’ it while the rest of us are ‘out’.

    This is why Reid’s Gambit is getting so much pushback. He’s showing a flagrant disregard for the unwritten rules, and with that, showing a cold quiet contempt for the hanky-flutterers and other moral scolds. I love this.

    Harry Reid: Punk. Who knew he had it in him?

  83. 83.

    Someguy

    There’s no need to make shit up. Romnney killed a woman – Joe Soptic’s wife – and probably a lot of other people with his heartless corporate mercenary tactics at Bain.

    Just tell the truth about him, if you want to demonize the SOB.

  85. 85.

    Someguy

    So you pulled a different letter than the one that was under discussion, one that didn’t gripe about the Sikhs per se but cited DOJ testimony describing an entire outreach program – and which was in fact complaining about the Muslim brotherhood? Bachman would have had trouble citing the program she had a beef about, unless she was to say it related to “Muslims, _______s and people of Arab and South Asian descent,” the way that the AAG describes the program. So you cite a different letter, and a tangential reference to Sikhs as proof of Bachman condemmning the Sikhs and complicity in the Sikh Temple shooting.

    That passes for honesty in these parts, huh?

  88. 88.

    evinfuilt

    @danah gaz (fka gaz): Which God? Mormons believe everyone can become a god.

    @Just Some Fuckhead:
    off-topic,
    That belief I think is the core reason for the Mormon Author Brandon Sandersons novels. All of them seem to deal with normal people becoming Gods of their own planets. Very enjoyable books, but his upbringing really shines through in that portion.

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