• Menu
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Before Header

  • About Us
  • Lexicon
  • Contact Us
  • Our Store
  • ↑
  • ↓
  • ←
  • →

Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I’d try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires

After roe, women are no longer free.

A consequence of cucumbers

In my day, never was longer.

Good lord, these people are nuts.

They are lying in pursuit of an agenda.

As long as McCarthy is Speaker, the House will never be in order.

The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand.

“Everybody’s entitled to be an idiot.”

Black Jesus loves a paper trail.

Republicans seem to think life begins at the candlelight dinner the night before.

The next time the wall street journal editorial board speaks the truth will be the first.

Motto for the House: Flip 5 and lose none.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

If you are still in the GOP, you are an extremist.

if you can’t see it, then you are useless in the fight to stop it.

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

Jack be nimble, jack be quick, hurry up and indict this prick.

Tick tock motherfuckers!

Happy indictment week to all who celebrate!

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

Not so fun when the rabbit gets the gun, is it?

Fani Willis claps back at Trump chihuahua, Jim Jordan.

Mobile Menu

  • Winnable House Races
  • Donate with Venmo, Zelle & PayPal
  • Site Feedback
  • War in Ukraine
  • Submit Photos to On the Road
  • Politics
  • On The Road
  • Open Threads
  • Topics
  • Balloon Juice 2023 Pet Calendar (coming soon)
  • COVID-19 Coronavirus
  • Authors
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Lexicon
  • Our Store
  • Politics
  • Open Threads
  • War in Ukraine
  • Garden Chats
  • On The Road
  • 2021-22 Fundraising!
You are here: Home / Politics / Republican Stupidity / The master of disaster

The master of disaster

by Tim F|  August 11, 20123:59 pm| 53 Comments

This post is in: Republican Stupidity

FacebookTweetEmail

With the elevation of young mr. Ryan, Bill Kristol is now two for two in picking veep nominees for the GOP. He must feel so proud.

FacebookTweetEmail
Previous Post: « And Now for Something Completely Different
Next Post: Obama Campaign Ad Goes After #RomneyRyan2012: ‘Back to the Failed Top-Down Policies’ »

Reader Interactions

53Comments

  1. 1.

    Anya

    August 11, 2012 at 4:02 pm

    Let’s hope Ryan implodes as fast and as furious as snowbilly grifter. But I am not holding my breath since he’s way much smarter than her.

  2. 2.

    Rathskeller

    August 11, 2012 at 4:03 pm

    Within the circle of epistemic closure, he’s done pretty well.

    His paychecks will continue.

  3. 3.

    anibundel

    August 11, 2012 at 4:03 pm

    Sigh. I suppose I shall now settle for an official Obama Bumper Sticker. Game Changer indeed.

  4. 4.

    Spatula

    August 11, 2012 at 4:05 pm

    I know all the Bots here want to talk about today is how evil Paul Ryan is and what a joke, etc., and how this will indeed make it so easy for Obama to win.

    Please keep in mind however, that the Mittbot and the Paulbot together make a very handsome ticket, and that Americans are incredibly stupid. That visual handsomeness is probably worth a couple of very important points.

  5. 5.

    dmsilev

    August 11, 2012 at 4:08 pm

    I’m sort of reminded of a sign I saw this morning. A restaurant near where I live was closed a while back by the city for health code violations. Today, there was a big sign in the window saying ‘Opening soon under SANE management”.

    The GOP badly needs to put up that sign.

  6. 6.

    anibundel

    August 11, 2012 at 4:09 pm

    @Spatula: The real question is will Ryan force Mitt to start parting his hair the other way so they match?

  7. 7.

    ET

    August 11, 2012 at 4:11 pm

    Apparently Romney & Ryan aren’t a new combo – this ad for some Salt Lake linotypers from 1910 means someone got there first.

  8. 8.

    jl

    August 11, 2012 at 4:11 pm

    @dmsilev:

    ” A restaurant near where I live was closed a while back by the city for health code violations. Today, there was a big sign in the window saying ‘Opening soon under SANE management”.
    The GOP badly needs to put up that sign. ”

    But they would lose three quarters of their customers.

  9. 9.

    Baud

    August 11, 2012 at 4:13 pm

    @anibundel:

    The real question is will Ryan force Mitt to start parting his hair the other way so they match?

    And thus the plot of Single White Male is hatched.

  10. 10.

    geg6

    August 11, 2012 at 4:14 pm

    Am I mistaken about the Village crush on Ryan? Other than the orgiastic reception to Ryan among the Glibertarians and the Teabaggers, all I’m seeing is that this is a desperate move on Mittens’ part and that he will not be allowed to run away from the Ryan budget plan. Are they not as mesmerized by those zombie blue eyes as we all assumed? Hmmmm.

    As for how “good looking” our friend spatula tells us they are and how we should be leery of that, pshaw. My mom always said pretty is as pretty does (not that I find either of them remotely attractive, mind you). By that standard, they are two of the ugliest creatures on earth.

  11. 11.

    JenJen

    August 11, 2012 at 4:14 pm

    Only two?

    Wasn’t Bill Kristol also once famously dubbed “Dan Quayle’s Brain”?

  12. 12.

    Bruce S

    August 11, 2012 at 4:16 pm

    Clarification from Weakly Standard – “No mater how it looks, a desperate, rudderless Mittens is not groveling at the feet of fucktards like us.”

    “Just got an email from the Romney campaign emphasizing that Gov. Romney made the choice before Steve [Hayes] and I wrote our repeated editorials and I take their word for it,” Kristol said.

    IMHO perhaps the biggest advantage for Romney’s campaign in this Ryan choice, is that for the next couple of weeks the hyperventilating, rage-mongering, spittle-inflected harpies Ann Coulter and Michelle Malkin will calm the fuck down on FOX News and Andrea Saul can keep her job.

  13. 13.

    gbear

    August 11, 2012 at 4:16 pm

    @Spatula: Ryan isn’t handsome and Romney is a clod. Metrosexual Obama has it all over both of them in the appearance and demeanor departments.

    They do excel in the extremely white men department though.

  14. 14.

    maya

    August 11, 2012 at 4:17 pm

    All they need now is Lauren Becall to do the voice overs for their pol ads.

  15. 15.

    jl

    August 11, 2012 at 4:17 pm

    @Bruce S:

    We have to take Mitt’s word on everything, no matter how implausible, so why did they bother to print that?

  16. 16.

    geg6

    August 11, 2012 at 4:18 pm

    @JenJen:

    Yup. That’s three strikes for that asshat.

  17. 17.

    Hill Dweller

    August 11, 2012 at 4:19 pm

    @Spatula: Romney has the looks and charisma of a manikin.

    Ryan is another in a long line of Republicans who has been pumped up by the feckless Village hacks, in their never ending quest for “balance”. He has never faced the kind of scrutiny he is about to face.

    As we’ve seen in the last two Presidential contests, Obama can drive the narrative without any help from the media during an election year. Ryan has personally written legislation that would privatize Social Security, turn Medicare into a voucher program, and completely gut Medicaid. The Obama campaign is going do to Ryan what they’ve done to Willard.

  18. 18.

    jacy

    August 11, 2012 at 4:21 pm

    I suggest we rename Mitty’s campaign the “Why do you keep hitting yourself?” campaign.

  19. 19.

    Hill Dweller

    August 11, 2012 at 4:22 pm

    @efgoldman: Drum seems to have forgotten about ’08. When The Maverick picked Caribou Barbie, the Obama campaign went after McCain’s judgement for picking Palin, not Palin per se.

    I suspect they’ll hit Romney for bringing in Ryan to write his economic policies, which will destroy Medicare, Medicaid and Social Security.

  20. 20.

    Violet

    August 11, 2012 at 4:23 pm

    @geg6: I think part of the problem is that the MSM hates Romney. They liked McCain and would be more liable to give him the benefit of the doubt because of that. They loathe Romney and the pick of Ryan falls under that cloud.

  21. 21.

    bemused

    August 11, 2012 at 4:23 pm

    @geg6:

    Hell, I heard a Republican woman in her early 50’s get gooey over Fred Reverse Mortgage Thompson when he was pretend running for Prez.

  22. 22.

    Tehanu

    August 11, 2012 at 4:27 pm

    @bemused:
    Gag me with the proverbial spoon. Better yet, gag Ryan.

  23. 23.

    The Thin Black Duke

    August 11, 2012 at 4:29 pm

    I can’t wait until the next ad from those cold-blooded snipers working for the Obama campaign hits Ryan right between those “dreamy” blue-eyes.

  24. 24.

    bemused

    August 11, 2012 at 4:33 pm

    It’s a head scratching mystery.

  25. 25.

    dogwood

    August 11, 2012 at 4:35 pm

    There’s more than a little bit of misogyny and bigotry among media and internet commentators who seem to think Romney/Ryan’s “handsomeness” will sway a significant block of voters. It suggests women are swayed by this shit, and it seems to suggest that only white guys are considered handsome. As a middle-aged white woman, I can assure you if I were voting for the most handsome candidate, I’d vote for Obama.

    Anyway, John Edwards’s handsome school-boy charm was supposed to sway voters as well, and we all know how that turned out.

  26. 26.

    Shawn in ShowMe

    August 11, 2012 at 4:36 pm

    @Bruce S:

    Ann Coulter and Michelle Malkin will calm the fuck down on FOX News and Andrea Saul can keep her job

    That is, until Mitt sends Andrea back on the talk show circuit to de-fang the Ryan budget. She’s a hired mercenary anyway, so I’m sure she already has some feelers out for her next job.

  27. 27.

    Xecky Gilchrist

    August 11, 2012 at 4:40 pm

    @dogwood: There’s more than a little bit of misogyny and bigotry among media and internet commentators who seem to think Romney/Ryan’s “handsomeness” will sway a significant block of voters.

    Exactly. I’m trying to decide if this is more or less offensive than the whole PUMA thing, and it’s kind of a tossup.

  28. 28.

    PurpleGirl

    August 11, 2012 at 4:48 pm

    I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Paul Ryan reminds me of Eddie Munster. I do not consider Eddie Munster as handsome or cute or anything.

    On the other hand, using an old saying I learned from my mother, President Obama could put his shoes by my bed anytime.

  29. 29.

    Lyrebird

    August 11, 2012 at 4:52 pm

    @gbear: Yeah, and the new Wonkette editrix ain’t the only voting American female who’s entranced by Biden. (What does she call him, world’s sexiest grandpa or something?)

    He’s funny, he’s authentic, and he *adores* his *very* smart and accomplished wife… I think that I actually want to watch the upcoming debates!

    Edited to add — @Xecky: THANK YOU!

    The other magic enhancing Mr. Biden’s adorableness is his (ahem) his responsibility for getting women in ALL STATES not just lucky states some legal protection from abuse and violence. Love you Mr. Biden!

  30. 30.

    gogol's wife

    August 11, 2012 at 4:53 pm

    @PurpleGirl:

    Agreed. Yesterday there was a full-page ad in the New York Times for some documentary that’s going to tell us how horrible Obama is. They featured a photograph of Obama that was supposed to look scary, but it looked incredibly handsome to me. The man just can’t look bad. (And as I often say, when I saw him in person I literally almost fainted.)

  31. 31.

    beltane

    August 11, 2012 at 4:58 pm

    @PurpleGirl: The only people who find Paul Ryan remotely handsome are the ones trapped in the conservative movement’s hothouse of suppressed homoeroticism and thwarted manhood. As a straight woman, all I see when I look at Ryan is a skeevey, smarmy visage that practically begs to be punched.

  32. 32.

    bemused

    August 11, 2012 at 4:59 pm

    @Lyrebird:

    I think it comes through that Biden is authentically crazy about his wife and family. He’s the real deal. Sane women find that very attractive.

  33. 33.

    bemused

    August 11, 2012 at 5:00 pm

    @beltane:

    To me, he looks like a young punk from The Sopranos or The Godfather.

  34. 34.

    Bruce S

    August 11, 2012 at 5:01 pm

    @Shawn in ShowMe:

    Like this?

    Wolf Blitzer clone: “Some say Paul Ryan’s plan will gut Medicare.”

    Andrea Saul: “But if seniors just moved to Massachusetts where Governor Romney mandated universal coverage, they wouldn’t have to worry about Paul Ryan – or Bain Capital, for that matter – taking away their health care.”

    You’ve got to wonder if she might also be on the payroll of that national campaign other than Mitt Romney’s…

  35. 35.

    PPOG Penguin

    August 11, 2012 at 5:06 pm

    Do we have an ETA yet on “Liberals attacking Paul Ryan shows they’re scared”?

  36. 36.

    A Ghost To Most

    August 11, 2012 at 5:07 pm

    The two of them together look like Herman and Eddie.

    Vote Munster/Munster 2012 !

  37. 37.

    beltane

    August 11, 2012 at 5:08 pm

    @bemused: He looks like the type of young punk who is found in an abandoned car in a Staten Island landfill with his (figurative) dick in his mouth.

  38. 38.

    bemused

    August 11, 2012 at 5:11 pm

    His budget plan stuffed in his mouth would more than suffice.

  39. 39.

    dogwood

    August 11, 2012 at 5:20 pm

    @gogol’s wife:
    I’m not one to go to political rallies so I’ve never seen a big-time candidate live. But I had a cousin who saw Obama speak in Boston in ’06 and my sister met the President in Montana in ’08. Funny, that the first comment each made about him was that he was even better looking in person than he was on tv. Hell, that was Nancy Reagan’s first comment after she met the President at the White House. There’s a great story about Axelrod running a focus group among white women in Illinois in 2003. They were shown various politicians and activists speaking (both black and white) and asked to state their impressions. The women were immediately drawn to Obama, which convinced Ax that a Senate win was doable. There’s a reason uneducated, insecure white males hate the president, and it’s got nothing to do with policy.

  40. 40.

    Violet

    August 11, 2012 at 5:21 pm

    @beltane: What’s the story with Ryan’s wife? She looked deeply unhappy to be there this morning. His kids looked bored too, but they’re young so no surprise. I was surprised by his wife, though. No adoring looks from her. What’s her story?

  41. 41.

    gogol's wife

    August 11, 2012 at 5:22 pm

    @dogwood:

    I don’t go to political rallies either — I just lucked into being at an event that allowed me to shake hands with him (it was before he had locked up the nomination, but he was getting there). I also was a couple of feet from Reggie Love (I didn’t know who he was at the time, but I certainly noticed him)! It was quite exciting.

  42. 42.

    Violet

    August 11, 2012 at 5:24 pm

    @A Ghost To Most: I really think someone needs to put out a commercial where 70’s and 80’s TV and film characters are in the audience nodding along to a Romney speech. Gorden Gekko, Thurston Howell III. Mr. Drysdale from the Beverly Hillbillies. I think it could cut through to some folks in a way traditional ads don’t.

  43. 43.

    NonyNony

    August 11, 2012 at 5:45 pm

    @Violet:

    The problem with that idea is that with the exception of Gorden Gekko all of those characters are more relatable, better loved, and less of a caricature than Mitt Romney is. Having them look like they approve of Mitt Romney can only make him look better than he already looks…

  44. 44.

    elaine benes

    August 11, 2012 at 5:48 pm

    @PPOG Penguin:

    I’ve already seen the “OMG Dems have started a politics of personal destruction campaign against Ryan!”

    I helpfully reminded them of Vince Foster, Whitewater, Swiftboat, whitey tapes, birth certificate, McCains black baby, death panels, etc.

    What a bunch of freakin’ crybabies.

  45. 45.

    Villago Delenda Est

    August 11, 2012 at 5:49 pm

    @PPOG Penguin:

    Oh, they’ve already declared that Ryan scares the hell out of the Obama people.

    Yes. They’re afraid they’ll stop breathing from laughing so hard at their good fortune, they will.

  46. 46.

    Tonal Crow

    August 11, 2012 at 5:51 pm

    @anibundel:

    @Spatula: The real question is will Ryan force Mitt to start parting his hair the other way so they match?

    Meet the new Boss, same as the old Boss.

  47. 47.

    WereBear

    August 11, 2012 at 5:51 pm

    If Ryan was such a Ball o’ Fire, he’s have set more than the Winger hearts on fire. They just love the cruelty; they don’t care who brings it.

  48. 48.

    danah gaz (fka gaz)

    August 11, 2012 at 6:00 pm

    @geg6: “Am I mistaken about the Village crush on Ryan? Other than the orgiastic reception to Ryan among the Glibertarians and the Teabaggers, all I’m seeing is that this is a desperate move on Mittens’ part”

    I’m only speculating wildly here, but maybe it’s because last time the MSM fluffers tried to sell Ryan to the public the old white geezers that still watch TV threw their canes at them.

  49. 49.

    NancyDarling

    August 11, 2012 at 6:06 pm

    @Spatula: Neither one of them is going to send a tingle down anyone’s leg although K-Lo and possibly Nooners might get a little moist.

  50. 50.

    Keith G

    August 11, 2012 at 6:07 pm

    @efgoldman:

    Attacking a veep candidate pretty much gets you nothing

    That’s a great point and I am thinking that the Chicago brain trust may feel they have little to gain attacking Ryan. I think an Obama campaign assault on a VP candidate would a worrying sign.

  51. 51.

    NancyDarling

    August 11, 2012 at 6:08 pm

    @PurpleGirl: Yeah! And he could eat crackers in my bed too.

  52. 52.

    Mr Stagger Lee

    August 11, 2012 at 7:33 pm

    @dogwood:

    There’s a reason uneducated, insecure white males hate the president, and it’s got nothing to do with policy.

    Keep your eyes off the White Lady!!!!

  53. 53.

    Uncle Cosmo

    August 11, 2012 at 7:54 pm

    Have you every seen how Ryan’s bright blue eyes can go dark gray all of a sudden?

    It happens every time a cloud passes behind him…

Comments are closed.

Primary Sidebar

Political Action

Postcard Writing Information

Recent Comments

  • NotMax on Late Night Open Thread: IN UNION THERE IS STRENGTH (Sep 26, 2023 @ 1:36am)
  • Villago Delenda Est on Late Night Open Thread: IN UNION THERE IS STRENGTH (Sep 26, 2023 @ 1:33am)
  • Villago Delenda Est on Late Night Open Thread: IN UNION THERE IS STRENGTH (Sep 26, 2023 @ 1:32am)
  • David 🌈 ☘The Establishment☘🌈 Koch on Late Night Open Thread: IN UNION THERE IS STRENGTH (Sep 26, 2023 @ 1:31am)
  • Anyway on Late Night Open Thread: IN UNION THERE IS STRENGTH (Sep 26, 2023 @ 1:30am)

🎈Keep Balloon Juice Ad Free

Become a Balloon Juice Patreon
Donate with Venmo, Zelle or PayPal

Balloon Juice Posts

View by Topic
View by Author
View by Month & Year
View by Past Author

Featuring

Medium Cool
Artists in Our Midst
Authors in Our Midst
We All Need A Little Kindness
What Has Biden Done for You Lately?

Balloon Juice Meetups!

All Meetups
Talk of Meetups – Meetup Planning

Fundraising 2023-24

Wis*Dems Supreme Court + SD-8

Calling All Jackals

Site Feedback
Nominate a Rotating Tag
Submit Photos to On the Road
Balloon Juice Mailing List Signup
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Links)
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Posts)

Twitter / Spoutible

Balloon Juice (Spoutible)
WaterGirl (Spoutible)
TaMara (Spoutible)
John Cole
DougJ (aka NYT Pitchbot)
Betty Cracker
Tom Levenson
TaMara
David Anderson
Major Major Major Major
ActualCitizensUnited

Join the Fight!

Join the Fight Signup Form
All Join the Fight Posts

Balloon Juice for Ukraine

Donate

Cole & Friends Learn Español

Introductory Post
Cole & Friends Learn Español

Site Footer

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Comment Policy
  • Our Authors
  • Blogroll
  • Our Artists
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2023 Dev Balloon Juice · All Rights Reserved · Powered by BizBudding Inc

Share this ArticleLike this article? Email it to a friend!

Email sent!