Ryan Gosling would tell Paul Ryan he’s wearing a 44 long when he should be wearing a 42 regular. For such a sexy guy…
Could be it’s an Ayn Rand thing.
by DougJ| 117 Comments
This post is in: Election 2012
Ryan Gosling would tell Paul Ryan he’s wearing a 44 long when he should be wearing a 42 regular. For such a sexy guy…
Could be it’s an Ayn Rand thing.
Comments are closed.
Zifnab
Can a man who doesn’t seem able to dress himself have the ability to lead the nation? It would be irresponsible not to speculate.
cathyx
Don’t men always think they’re bigger than they are?
Freddie deBoer
Creators don’t worry about what the parasites think are the correct sizes. Creators define what size is correct through the power of their will.
Napoleon
You can’t go wrong with Zevon.
Cassidy
@cathyx: Hpow’s that line go from Braveheart? Some men are bigger than others? lol
Seriously, though, if your Paul Ryan’s age and you don’t know your suit measurements (and your job involves wearing a suit) then you’re doing it wrong.
Mark S.
Oh, this is terrible:
I actually think this is a worse pick than Palin. This is tearing off the mask and letting everyone see the GOP in all its asshole glory.
And I have yet to hear a woman say she thinks Paul Ryan is attractive. Only Beltway pundit men find Ryan attractive.
RoonieRoo
In that first picture, I think he is wearing Romney’s jacket.
xian
@Mark S.: i like how they casually admit that Romney was headed for a loss.
Rafer Janders
@RoonieRoo:
If he’s not, then his own jacket is at least one size too big for him.
If he is, why? Didn’t Ryan wear a suit coat or sports coat himself?
SatanicPanic
He came of age in the 80’s, I can’t fault him too much for having bad taste.
Punchy
Part of their “Dont Ask, Dont Spell” mantra.
schrodinger's cat
@Mark S.: At least Sarah Palin wore clothes well. Did Ryan dress in the dark? It would have been better to leave the jacket behind and just wear the shirt. This looks sloppy.
Ryan is not attractive, hell I think even Mitt is better looking, even though he is almost my father’s age.
Soonergrunt
To
steal shamelessly fromparaphrase Andy Borowitz:schrodinger's cat
May be Stacy and Clinton can teach Ryan, What not to wear.
DougJ
@RoonieRoo:
The jacket in the second pic is similarly too big.
LTL-FTC
This post is a play on the PaulRyanGosling twitter, correct? Even if it’s not, it’s a good reference.
Quincy
Great post title.
I’m just really thankful for team Obama. Not sure if its the concern troll in me or not, but I can’t shake the feeling that eight or twelve years ago the combination of Ryan’s beltway popularity with the Republican’s standard muddy-the-waters strategy on medicare cuts would’ve worked. While the entire Dem messaging apparatus has improved, its what OFA did to Romney on Bain that makes me confident they’ll nail this sociopath.
schrodinger's cat
@Soonergrunt: I refuse to believe that is an expensive haircut, looks more like the work of Matt Yglesias’s unlicensed barbers.
BTW Soonergrunt, I successfully replaced the hard drive in my laptop and was able to make an image, so now my laptop works like before and is just the way I want it but with more hard disk space. Many thanks.
DougJ
@LTL-FTC:
yes
Mark S.
Hey, whatever else you want to say about Nick Gillespie, at least his leather jackets fit.
Bizono
You may ask yourself, am I right, am I wrong?
beltane
@schrodinger’s cat: Mitt Romney has a generic handsomeness. Paul Ryan is a clammy-skinned ghoul who makes my flesh crawl. If he want to dress like an undertaker he should at least put on some black eyeliner for proper effect.
RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist
Ron Paul had worse suits. And those completely indefensible grandpa shoes. But that jacket’s pretty bad on Ryan. Dude, you’re a millionaire. Get a pro to fix up some duds for you and learn to wear them.
I used to sell menswear and I could tell stories. Pro tip: find a good tailor. He’ll probably be old and will have a funny accent. Listen closely to everything he says. Buy and wear only what he tells you to. You will look like a million bucks and it will be cheaper and easier than searching for an off-the-rack fit.
uila
You’re right, put some glasses on him and you’ve got Liz Lemon’s agent, Simon.
Chyron HR
He may not be “handsome” per se, but you can’t deny that David Byrne is looking pretty good for his age.
RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist
@DougJ:
The armhole is cut low in the American manner. This gives good armpit ventilation for hot weather. But when you raise your arm you get that unsightly pull across the front. European cut suits tend to have a higher cut armhole and lay flatter when you move.
Dennis SGMM
@Mark S.:
The Republicans in the House and Senate have succumbed to hubris. They know that their base will accept anything they put out so it never occurred to them that the rest of America might not be enthusiastic about granny-starving.
Some of the wankers in the punditocracy have bloviated about the choice of Ryan leading us to a national debate about “the issues.” That may well be true, but not in the way that they think; the GOP Teahaddists don’t want a debate on their plans for America, they want to keep on spouting meaningless patriotic-sounding rhetoric to an unquestioning audience.
Bobby Thomson
Love that movie. I don’t think Ryan is better than the gap in his budget funding.
RoonieRoo
@DougJ: Yeah, your right. I was just thinking the first one could be Romney’s since Ryan isn’t wearing a tie either and figured he wasn’t wearing a jacket that day. It just looks weird with the too big jacket and no tie. But looking at the second picture, maybe he is just a horrible dresser.
schrodinger's cat
@beltane: So true, I must say that the Beltway Punditubbies have a strange taste in men. Remember during the last cycle how they were touting Fred Thompson as the most good looking candidate. Yeah may be if you are 65+.
Cassidy
@RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist: Considering his age, he should be wearing a sportier cut anyway.
Kane
Empty suit.
beltane
@schrodinger’s cat: Where the pundits smelled English Leather the rest of us smelled Metamucil. They’ve got a very weird subculture going on there; too bad the rest of us are forced to hear about it all the time.
RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist
@RoonieRoo:
Maybe, but that would be out of character considering the amount of time he spends in the gym. A buff bod and sartorial vanity usually go hand in hand.
Kane
@beltane: These are the same people who were calling Donald Rumsfeld a stud.
NancyDarling
@schrodinger’s cat: This 65+ old lady doesn’t find Fred Thompson good looking. And Rmoney is good looking only if one has a fetish for store window mannequins. Ryan creeps me out. I like lean, but he’s got that “lean and hungry” look.
And Ross, any millionaire who sleeps in his office is not going to spring for a tailor.
RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist
@Cassidy:
Considering his politics he should be sporting breeches and a powdered wig.
RedKitten
@RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist:
That same advice could also be used for women who shop for bras. The best fitters tend to be elderly eastern European ladies, who have no qualms about shoving their hands into your bra cups to adjust you. After they’re through with you, though, you look 2 inches taller, 10lbs thinner, and a fair bit younger, to boot.
schrodinger's cat
@RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist: May be he thinks he is bigger than he really is. Many people (especially women) have a distorted body image, they think they look bigger/smaller than they really are. They dress according to the image in their head not reality. I have a stick thin friend who thinks she is fat, and dresses in shapeless outfits, she also comes from an extremely religious family and is very repressed, so may be she wants to be modest but she is always wearing ill fitting stuff.
Dennis SGMM
@RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist:
Naw, a top hat and a cutaway coat; back to the Gilded Age!
RedKitten
And yes, those jackets look like hell on him. If his shoulders really ARE that wide, then he needs a European-fit jacket that will taper down a bit more to his waist. Otherwise, that big boxy fit just makes him look like he’s borrowed his jacket from someone much larger.
RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist
@NancyDarling:
False economy. When I stopped scouting fancy brands and let Mr. Parag tell me what to buy my wardrobe cost dropped and I looked better than ever. Pros know clothes.
Linda Featheringill
Lots of politicians have what might be called a dresser, someone to put them together well before the candidate is allowed out the door. Ryan obviously needs one of these.
And yes, get a good tailor.
I personally wish that image didn’t matter so much but it does.
Roger Moore
@RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist:
FTFY.
schrodinger's cat
@NancyDarling: Rmoney is handsome till he opens his mouth. I have that reaction to many guys though. I call them himbos. GOP has nominated a himbo and a wannabe himbo. So sad.
beltane
@RedKitten: He looks like he swiped the jacket from a drunk guy passed-out on a park bench.
Brandon
@Kane: I am surprised that it took 32 comments for the first “empty suit” crack. I thought we had standards here.
RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist
@Dennis SGMM:
Genius! Someone please ‘shoop Ryan into spats and striped trousers, with a diamond stick pin and a walking stick.
schrodinger's cat
@RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist: Fit is everything! Good tailors are so hard to come by though.
gelfling545
@schrodinger’s cat: When they go on about how “attractive” he is I figure they mean compared to other congresspeople. Otherwise, Ryan, like Palin, looks like a lot of other people – which is to say ordinary.That is fine. Elections shouldn’t be beauty pageants and pretty is as pretty does. What he does and would like to do is quite ugly.
Villago Delenda Est
@RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist:
This. It’s hard to imagine he spends time in the gym but no time at all with a tailor who can fit him properly to show off all that time in the gym, even when wearing a suit and tie.
The whole idea is that you don’t have to walk around bare chested to show off those magnificent pecs. The bonus is, it implies the six pack is there and therefore gives women (or gay men, for that matter) the incentive to undress you with their eyes.
He’s just s schlemiel, I guess.
Napoleon
@SatanicPanic:
That suit coat does have a bit of a Talking Heads look to it.
RoonieRoo
@RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist:
Hee hee.
RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist
@schrodinger’s cat:
Big stores still have them on staff and they make $$ you wouldn’t believe. A lot of the best are Eastern European and they’re absolute magicians. But they’ll tell you when you’ve bought the wrong thing and you should listen.
Phil Perspective
@Soonergrunt: I don’t think anyone is distracted from that. It’s why Paul Ryan is called The Zombie-eyed Granny Starver. It’s funny, Tom Tomorrow wasn’t up on all that and was wondering why that phrase was appearing all over his Twitter feed. We had to fill him in. Charles Pierce might become a legend before this campaign is over.
Cassidy
@schrodinger’s cat: As part of our exit classes out of hte military, they had a lady come in and give a class on how to dress. It was kinda cool in that, I’ve always been a black suit kinda guy with a white shirt and solid color ties. I don’t deviate from that much and I don’t wear suits often enough to get outside my comfort zone. I ended up going to see her afterward and got a couple of suits made and she and my wife bonded over making fun of me as they picked out the new colors I was going to try. I at least
know how to dress myselfhave a wife with good fashion sense. A lot of the guys getting out, though….rea
@Bizono: My god, what have you done?
Napoleon
@Chyron HR:
Ah, beat me to it.
Cassidy
@Villago Delenda Est: He’s starting to see a bit of love handle and is embarassed. That’s why he has such loose coats. He thinks he’s hiding it.
amk
TP tweets.
ROMNEY CHAIR, 7:15AM: Romney’s Medicare plan “very different” from Ryan ROMNEY SPOX, 9:30AM: “There are no differences”
The piece.
J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford
Paul Ryan looks like he’s Romney’s missing son. Romney should have gone with Chris Christie or Gov Susana Martinez.
Anya
@Mark S.: What’s the old native proveb: If you sit by a river long enough, you’ll see the body of your enemy float by.
From this angle the suit looks even more ill fitting.
RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist
My tailoring breakthrough came in about 1985 when I decided I was old enough that I didn’t have to stand up straight. But my clothes fit like hell. One day I had the brilliant thought “Hey, maybe I can get my suits to slouch too. Then they’ll fit no matter how sloppy my posture” And you know, it worked out just like that. I’m still slovenly but my clothes look OK on me.
dance around in your bones
When I saw Ryan on the day they Made The Announcement That Shook The World /snark I thought he had borrowed Romney’s coat.
He looks like a kid at his Bar Mitzvah, wearing a suit he can ‘grow into’.
schrodinger's cat
@Cassidy: Before we were married my husband had only one ill fitting double breasted blazer which was two sizes too big for him. He was amazed how good he could look in a suit (which was altered to fit perfectly) that actually fit.
beltane
@J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford: Susan Martinez was the one who scared me, just as it would have made me nervous if John McCain had picked Kay Bailey Hutchison or Olympia Snowe instead of Sarah Palin.
dance around in your bones
@RoonieRoo: Aaaaand I see RonnieRoo beat me to THAT observation by a mile.
Violet
The fact that Ryan doesn’t have clothes that fit him is yet another example of how not ready for prime time he is. People who are aiming for a national profile hire stylists to help them. Ryan obviously never has.
raven
@RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist: Mine came when I grew out the sleeves on the Chicago Police motorcycle jacket I bought in 69. Had to get a new one.
schrodinger's cat
@NancyDarling: That’s because you have good taste and a brain. Both of which our DC pundits lack.
Roy G.
It just shows what an outsider Ryan really is – if he were a true Wisconsinite, he would be wearing a green and gold Packers sweatshirt on top of some Badgers black and red striped Zubaz.
Villago Delenda Est
Ahhooooooo Wearwolves of London!
Ahhooooooo!
JustMe
I’m going to let this slide: men invariably buy suits 1 or 2 sizes too big for themselves. I see this all the time.
Plus, if you dress too well in DC, they start to look at you askance. The secret to fitting in with the DC style is to spend a lot of money (to show that you’re not poor) but make sure to look like crap (to show that you’re not trying to be “uppity”).
wrb
I hate jackets that aren’t “too big.”
But I don’t much give a fuck what people think about it.
jibeaux
@beltane: Let me spare you some nervousness in future elections by pointing out that a pro-choice pres/VP candidate, even one as tepid and useless as KBH, is a completely DOA proposition for the Republicans.
raven
Doc Martin always wears a well fitted suit and he’s still a dick.
hep kitty
To be fair, Ron Paul had the worst fitting suit ever, and that was in the debates!
Waynski
@beltane: It’s actually easy to explain. Men with power are attractive to women in DC. They could look like Grandpa Munster, but if they’re a cabinet member or Chairman of this or that committee they can got some DC lovin.
OT but do you think Grandpa Munster will be Secretary of State?
Villago Delenda Est
@Waynski:
This is pretty much how Henry Kissinger explained how he happened to be dating Jill St. John.
EconWatcher
Ryan is the spitting image of a boss I had when I was a young pup lawyer. Boy, I hated that guy.
Cassidy
I think the whole athletic thing is funny. Somthing tells me that the Islamic Shock would smoke his ass in PT.
LanceThruster
He does look like Josh Baskin in the end of “Big.”
It also reminds me of the Dice Clay bit, “40 Too Long.”
raven
@Cassidy: He’d damn sure post his ass.
flukebucket
No time to read through the comments to see if anybody else noticed it but that picture of Ron Paul in the shoes that are two sizes too big is hilarious. I swear it looks like he picked his shoes while dumpster diving. How he kept those on his feet while he walked I will never know.
Feudalism Now!
Dougj missed the opportunity here. All hail Zevon, but Talking Heads was a more apropos choice. ‘Psycho Killer’ should be Ryan’s theme song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJ6fjGS1lRg
Mnemosyne (iPhone)
Someone will need to pick RossInDetroit up from the floor at the mere suggestion, I know, but you can get a decent-looking suit altered to fit you at Men’s Wearhouse for, like, $400. Even my brother who works as a house painter has a nice-looking suit that fits him well despite the fact that he’s getting a little beefy as he advances into his 40s.
Lurking Canadian
@Mark S.: It sure is nice to see Politico aiming an anonymously sourced, “some say”, insider hatchet job the other way for a change.
Rafer Janders
I love Paul Ryan. Everything seems right there. You know, I come back to Paul; he’s the right height. His suit coat is the right color for this time of year, kind of a darkish-grayish sort of thing. It just feels right.
JustMe
@Mnemosyne (iPhone): Men’s Wearhouse is a false economy, same as Joseph A. Bank.
Bobby Thomson
@Waynski:
Nope. Al is an actual Socia1ist and not just someone who wants to return tax rates to Clinton or even . . . gasp . . . Reagan levels.
MaximusNYC
It looks like Ryan just walked into a fancy restaurant underdressed, and the maitre d’ handed him the standby jacket.
cckids
@Mark S.:
This. In what world is Ryan more attractive than Joe Biden (given the “hottest VP ever” nonsense out there)? Intellect & personality count too, ya know. Shows in the eyes.
Ryan is like your best friends creepy little brother, always trying to get a glimpse of someone in their bra.
Maude
Where’s his cheese hat?
Violet
@cckids:
So true. And he’d be the first to tattle to the principal about if anyone did anything wrong at school.
RedKitten
I’ve figured it out. Paul Ryan looks like the love child of Matthew Morrison and Jim Varney, with Charles Manson’s eyes.
There, I can relax now.
Frankensteinbeck
This thread is depressing me. I love dressing well, and I can’t get decent men’s clothing in Kentucky. It’s made worse because I have a very thick neck, but I’m neither thin nor fat. Fitted shirts are very hard to find, and regular shirts make me look like I’m wearing a tent. Damn you, The South!!!
DougJ
@Frankensteinbeck:
Just have a tailor take your shirts in. It only costs about 12 bucks per shirt to do this.
1badbaba3
DougJ, the imagery in your recent posts (“ass clowns”, “jizz their pants”,”public orgy”,”blows his cover”,”penis size”,”dick whisperer”,”sexy guy”) has me concerned about two things: have you recovered from your western excursion? And seeing as you brought back the good stuff, why won’t you share, bogart?Seriously though, good to have you back good sir.You have been on FIRE of late…er, no pun intended.
JustMe
@Frankensteinbeck: It’s made worse because I have a very thick neck, but I’m neither thin nor fat. Fitted shirts are very hard to find, and regular shirts make me look like I’m wearing a tent.
Custom made shirts, my friend. Stop into a tailor’s or other upscale shirt shop, and they will take your measurements and make them. (honestly, it seems like every one of these places just sends your measurements to the same shirtmaker in NJ), but if you have unusual measurements, it’s worth it.
Alternately, get one of those “tent” shirts and take it to a tailor to have it adjusted for a more fitted look.
Violet
@Frankensteinbeck:
Go for custom made shirts. I used to date a guy who had a build I’d say was similar to how you describe yourself. Very thick neck. He opted for custom made shirts and they made a huge difference to how he looked. I googled “custom made shirts” and Kentucky and a couple places came up.
The right shirt makes a huge difference. Collar length and height are widely variable and can make a big difference whether you look put together or not.
If you get sized one time, you can just order the same thing again the next time. Bulk orders should also be cheaper. I recommend custom fit shirts to every man after seeing how huge a difference they made to the guy I used to date.
Frankensteinbeck
@JustMe:
We do not have upscale shirt shops. This is Kentucky. There MIGHT be a tailor in town. I’ll look. I found a decent shoe repair shop, and I thank Celestia for it. I can’t get really good shoes, but his second hand collection are better shoes than I can buy new locally and much cheaper – even including putting the sole guards and taps on them (I walk a lot).
Kilkee
@Violet: You do know that Ryan was named “Biggest Brown Noser” in his high school yearbook, right? True story. It’s on teh Intertubes.
Violet
@Frankensteinbeck:
Custom made shirts in Kentucky:
Louisville: http://www.executiveimage.com/
and: http://www.modellescustomtailors.com/
Lexington: http://www.gravescox.com/index.cfm/custom-clothing/
Don’t know how close you live to those places, but a one time trip might be worth it.
Violet
@Kilkee: I’ve seen a scan of the yearbook page. Doesn’t surprise me in the least.
Violet
Crap, I forgot about the multiple links rule. Okay, let me post without one of the links.
@Frankensteinbeck:
Custom made shirts in Kentucky:
Louisville: http://www.executiveimage.com/
and: http://www.modellescustomtailors.com/
Violet
@Frankensteinbeck:
And here’s one in Lexington: http://www.gravescox.com/index.cfm/custom-clothing/
With all those rich people in horse country, there have to be some good tailors somewhere in KY.
Cassidy
@Frankensteinbeck: Dude, JC Penney or Sears. Their suit guys are always SME’s. Even if they don’t have what you need, they’ll know how to make it happen.
LanceThruster
@Frankensteinbeck:
Also find a good online shirt seller, and order a few to check out until you know exactly what cut/fit suits you. I’ve had great results with Arrow and Hathaway.
Rafer Janders
@Frankensteinbeck:
Do you have the Internet in Kentucky? If so you can shop on-line. Try Brooks Brother for their new slim fit and extra-slim fit shirts.
Nemesis
Yeah, Nem noted this on Monday. ryan may be P90X hawt, but he fails to show it with his sartorial choices.
He and I are the same size, although Im 15 years his senior and 15 lbs heavier. He is just doing it wrong.
His coat is ill-fitting.
He looked loosey without a tie.
He has a 5 oclock shadow at 11 in the morning.
He has dark circles under his eyes.
He is a zombie-eyed granny starver.
He will be ground into dust come November.
Its over I tell ya!
Mr_Gravity
t-shirts cargo shorts just turned 56.
comfortably unelectable.
Mr_Gravity
not that anyone asked…
muddy
I think he wears his suits too big because he thinks it gives him an air of gravitas.
dance around in your bones
@Mr_Gravity:
I salute you, brother!
That is the state uniform in SoCal where I live;)
Soonergrunt
@schrodinger’s cat: Glad I (and others) could be of assistance! Enjoy your roomy new hard drive!
Xecky Gilchrist
@Bizono: Dammit, you beat me to that one. LOL
mclaren
Now that’s an 80s pop song reference not everyone will get. Warren Zevon’s The Werewolves of London, 1978.