Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

The republican caucus is already covering themselves with something, and it’s not glory.

Republicans do not pay their debts.

When your entire life is steeped in white supremacy, equality feels like discrimination.

When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.

Not all heroes wear capes.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires republicans to act in good faith.

If you are still in the GOP, you are an extremist.

Republican obstruction dressed up as bipartisanship. Again.

I did not have this on my fuck 2022 bingo card.

Not so fun when the rabbit gets the gun, is it?

“But what about the lurkers?”

Sitting here in limbo waiting for the dice to roll

A Senator Walker would be an insult to the state and the nation.

… riddled with inexplicable and elementary errors of law and fact

Come on, man.

Republicans are radicals, not conservatives.

We are aware of all internet traditions.

Whatever happens next week, the fight doesn’t end.

Balloon Juice has never been a refuge for the linguistically delicate.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

Americans barely caring about Afghanistan is so last month.

I did not have telepathic declassification on my 2022 bingo card.

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

You are here: Home / Past Elections / Election 2012 / Convention Wrap-Up

Convention Wrap-Up

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I just got back to the no-tell motel, and would have been able to step on Anne Laurie’s post earlier if the cops had not shut down an entire fucking southbound lane of a highway. President Obama was on the “Amer” part of “God Bless America” and I was already rushing for the exits, I am that exhausted. Imani, who seemingly has a bottomless pit of energy is heading back to the PPL to meet Heather. I figure I have a long drive, might as well be smart and get to bed early.

At any rate, the entire thing was just great. John Kerry was awesome, and I saw on my twitter feed that a lot of people were wondering where this John Kerry came from. What short memories we have, because John Kerry in 2008 gave one of my favorite speeches:

At any rate, the Obama speech was great, and the place was just electric. There was this crazy older woman about 6 rows in front of me down and to the right who just kept screaming “I love you Obama” and “YES WE CAN” and it was really funny and sweet at the same time.

I’ll have more to write about tomorrow night when we get home, but I did want to note that I think I saw the permanently deranged Robert Stacey McCain in the press room at the Arena.

Reader Interactions

83Comments

  1. 1.

    MoeLarryAndJesus

    John, thank you for this site and all that you do.

    A day without Balloon Juice is like a day without some cat following me around demanding butler service. Which might sound negative, but it’s not.

  2. 2.

    DFS

    McCain showed up in public? Won’t Brett Kimberlin follow him home and start killing his pets or something?

  3. 3.

    David Koch

    There was this crazy older woman about 6 rows in front of me down and to the right who just kept screaming “I love you Obama” and “YES WE CAN”

    There’s no need to call Ann Romney a “crazy older woman”

  4. 4.

    Geeno

    I think what surprised me about Kerry was the amount and quality of the humor. He’s a great speaker, but I haven’t seen him be that funny.

  5. 5.

    Comrade Javamanphil

    How easily even those of us in the weeds of this shit every day can adopt the narrative of the media. Kerry kicked Bush to the curb in the 2004 debates. But he didn’t counter the Swiftboaters quite quickly enough and we all think he’s bad at this.

  6. 6.

    Narcissus

    Hey cole you’re the only dude I know who goes on a road-trip with an amazing smoking hot chick and goes to bed early for tomorrow’s drive

    don’t change dude

  9. 9.

    BGinCHI

    Drive safe Cole-san.

    This is your last chance to tell us about the BBQ you ate.

    Just lie to me if you didn’t have any. You could at least judge the cole slaw for vinegar content.

    It’s COLE slaw, your namesake!

  14. 14.

    Matt McIrvin

    Looks like the big story is going to be that the Obama speech was a failure because it wasn’t the Bill Clinton speech or the Michelle Obama speech. Obama is toast, he’s never going to be able to beat Bill Clinton on election night.

  15. 15.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    There was this crazy older woman about 6 rows in front of me down and to the right who just kept screaming “I love you Obama” and “YES WE CAN”

    wearing a yellow jacket?

  17. 17.

    Anya

    This (via Richard Adams at the Guardian) made me sad for these lovely people. I hope they get to meet the POTUS in person.

    “Pity the poor delegates – and there are thousands of them – who couldn’t get in to the arena to watch Barack Obama make his Big Speech live,” writes Ed Pilkington.
    ______
    Take Douglas Smith. He drove all the way from Washington DC to be here on Tuesday. When I asked him just now was he disappointed, he said he was “very, very, very, very, very disappointed”. Yes, that’s five verys.
    _______
    But he said he was still glad to be here. “I’m disappointed. But happy.”
    ________
    Gina Meola-Wentz came even further. She drove 10 hours and 600 miles with her two kids to be in Charlotte, all the way from Ashtabula, Ohio. “Well yeah I’m disappointed, but we’re making the best of it.”
    _______
    Journalists are a cynical bunch at heart. But I’ve got to say, the enthusiasm in the Crown Ballroom, from hundreds of Obama supporters who could so easily be mightly upset tonight, is pretty something.

  21. 21.

    Hill Dweller

    @Matt McIrvin: Ed Kilgore predicted this earlier today.

    Obama could roll out of bed and give the best speech most of these hacks have ever seen. They chose workman like for a reason.

  24. 24.

    Anya

    “How does he even know my name? I mean aren’t these guys supposed to be these bigwig elites who don’t waste their time on the little people like me, me representing the average American who yeah I did say in Alaska you can see Russia from our land base and I was making the point that we are strategically located on the globe and when it comes to transportation corridors and resources that are shared and fought over, Alaska and I as the governor, had known what I was doing in dealing with some international issues that had to do with our resources that could help secure the nation,” Palin said. “So it’s funny that he would take a little pot shot like that, but it’s funny he even knows my name. “

    Did this idiot forget that she was McCain’s running mate? I swear that woman gets more idiotic.

  26. 26.

    waratah

    @Matt McIrvin: I came to the same conclusion from reading twitter. I think it is funny coming from reporters and pundits because Clinton’s speech was telling it like it is which is what they should have been doing.

  28. 28.

    JustRuss

    I remember Kerry’s 2008 speech, and thinking “Where was this guy in 2004?” It was that good. Didn’t see him tonight, I’ll have to check it out. Obama did great.

  30. 30.

    Mnemosyne

    @Anya:

    Obama’s speech was about “grim determination”? Really? I think we have another of those British-to-American failures to translate here.

  31. 31.

    horatius

    @Anya:

    little people like me, me representing the average American

    Will somebody tell this lady that she represents the below average American, y’know the mouthbreathing types?

  34. 34.

    Person of Choler

    So where did all the people go who were going to fill the outdoor stadium but couldn’t fit indoors?

    By the way, what made the guy who was going to stop the ocean’s rise decide he couldn’t fend off a late summer rainfall for a couple of hours?

  35. 35.

    rikyrah

    when he said

    I AM THE PRESIDENT

    I nearly cried. it hit me in the gut…all the anger I’ve had at the fuckers who have disrespected him from jump street.

    hell fucking yeah.

    HE IS THE PRESIDENT.

  36. 36.

    Violet

    Thank you, John. It has been tremendous fun to live vicariously through you and ABL. So glad you went. Rest up.

  38. 38.

    ? Martin

    I mean aren’t these guys supposed to be these bigwig elites who don’t waste their time on the little people like me, me representing the average American

    Average Americans don’t give up on a job halfway through, and then grift the public for vacation money.

  39. 39.

    magurakurin

    @replicnt6: But when his scientist find that it doesn’t work he’ll trick Obama into backing it and then he will expose Obama as a fool who was duped by fake science and win. But Simon Templar will rescue the real scientist, a beautiful young woman, and she’ll show Obama’s scientist the real….

    oh wait, that’s a Val Kilmer movie.

    fuck Rmoney, we’re takin’ him out.

  41. 41.

    cckids

    There was this crazy older woman about 6 rows in front of me down and to the right who just kept screaming “I love you Obama” and “YES WE CAN” and it was really funny and sweet at the same time.

    OT, but two weeks ago when Pres. O was in Vegas, my daughter & I went to see him. Leaving after the speech, two little old ladies (both over 70 easily, both white) met back up, having been seated separately.

    Both were very excited & fired up; one said “did you see? He shook my hand! HE SHOOK MY HAND!!”. The other smugly says “He hugged me!”. First one: “Well, you have that walker. You always get special treatment”. We were falling down laughing.

    Enthusiasm gap my ass.

  42. 42.

    Mnemosyne

    @Person of Choler:

    Hey, you guys are the ones who think Obama controls the weather:

    Obama, “continues to blame anyone and everyone for the drought but himself,” reads a release from Boehner’s office posted online and distributed to reporters Monday. The quote was attributed to Boehner himself in a Financial Times story. The online post and the press release came from Boehner spokesperson Kevin Smith.

  43. 43.

    Mnemosyne

    @cckids:

    Enthusiasm gap my ass.

    I think the enthusiasm gap closed about 5 minutes into Mrs. Obama’s speech on Tuesday. Possibly earlier.

  48. 48.

    Hill Dweller

    @BGinCHI: I think the wingnuts were lobbying the pundits behind the scenes to start comparing Clinton and Obama even before his speech, ignoring the fact that Obama’s people helped Clinton write it.

    Of course, the Village, scared the Dems’ successful convention might produce a bump, do their best to shit on it. They need that ad revenue.

  54. 54.

    MattR

    @Anya: I am mildly surprised that Palin never went full metal birther. I’m sure there has to be some self serving reason that she hasn’t.

  55. 55.

    Spaghetti Lee

    Ah, fuck the media. They all had their little ever-so-precious concern-trolly “Obama’s lost his base/lost his enthusiasm/is being too partisan responses” written before the speech even began. Fuck Erickson, fuck Coulter, fuck Malkin, fuck Lowry, fuck Goldberg, fuck Will, fuck Brooks, and super-extra fucks to Jennifer Rubin.

  57. 57.

    Mnemosyne

    @MattR:

    I am mildly surprised that Palin never went full metal birther. I’m sure there has to be some self serving reason that she hasn’t.

    My guess is that she doesn’t want to open that can of worms with a 10-foot pole given all of the controversy and speculation about her last pregnancy.

  60. 60.

    mdblanche

    @replicnt6:

    I believe in laboratories, looking at ways to conduct electricity with — with cold fusion, if we can come up with it. It was the University of Utah that solved that. We somehow can’t figure out how to duplicate it.

    That is the really damning part of what he said. He didn’t just make a boneheaded mistake, he revealed that he is fundamentally ignorant about how scientists actually work.

  63. 63.

    Gil O. Teen

    It was a good convention, with some fine political speech-making from Presidents Obama and Clinton, FLOTUS, Gov. Patrick, and many, many others. But let’s not get too cocky. The next eight weeks are going to be about some very dirty politicking.

    We’re already seeing the pre-written stories from various corporate media outlets, explaining how Obama’s speech wasn’t that good, or was overshadowed by Clinton or Michelle, or that, all objective evidence to the contrary, the Democrat Party (sic) is disillusioned, divided, and lacks enthusiasm. At this point, they’ll say just about anything to try to suppress or deny the post-convention bounce.

    Next up, a billion dollars of negative advertising over the next eight weeks, featuring nothing but blatant lies (most of them already debunked) and smears against Obama and Biden. Each new lie or smear, no matter how obviously false, will be lovingly echoed, amplified and explicated in exhaustive detail by the corporate media drones whose paychecks depend on fellating the GOP.

    Combine that with a well-funded voter-suppression effort – the likes of which we haven’t seen since before the Voting Right Act was passed – and it may still be enough to get Rmoney & Lyin’ Ryan close enough to 270 electoral votes to steal the election. They’ll need help to do that, either from Republicans involved in administering the voting in swing states, or, if it comes to that, SCOTUS, but I’m sure that Fat Tony Scalia and/or whoever’s the 2012 equivalent of Kathryn Harris or Ken Blackwell will have their backs.

  64. 64.

    dm

    I just watched the 2008 Kerry speech — he used the “talk about being for it before you were against it” (about Candidate McCain vs. Senator McCain) and the “before he debates Obama, he’d better finish the debate with himself” (about Candidate McCain vs. Senator McCain) in 2008, too.

    But there’s nothing wrong with recycling good material.

  66. 66.

    pragmatism

    @Death Panel Truck: HA! That is funnier. a lot of the facebook hurt feelers are along the lines of “why do you only pick on conservatives?” variety. i see them as equal opportunists. The Big Dog and Joey Biden take their share of lumps from the onion.

  67. 67.

    Death Panel Truck

    @pragmatism: I wouldn’t want to drink a beer with Bush, but I’d happily knock back some Cuervo with “Uncle Joe.”

    And then go for a cruise in the Trans Am to score some tail. ;)

  68. 68.

    Mnemosyne

    @Death Panel Truck:

    Joe Biden has heard the Onion story and thinks it’s hilarious:

    C/D:  Sadly, we must ask about the Onion story. While shirtless, have you ever washed a 1981 Pontiac Trans Am in your driveway?
    __
    JB: [Laughing] You think I’d drive a Trans Am? I have been in my bathing suit in my driveway and not only washed my Goodwood-green 1967 Corvette but also simonized it.  At least the Onion should have had me washing a Trans Am convertible. I love convertibles.

  70. 70.

    pragmatism

    @Death Panel Truck: that reminds me of the astronaut episode on the simpsons when homer calls the Big Dog and asks him if he knows where they keep the tang.
    “If there is anyone who knows where the tang is, it’s you.”

  71. 71.

    TS

    @Anya:

    Speaking of Russia’s neighbor

    I tear up whenever I see Gabby Giffords and if ever there is a reason that Palin will never return to politics it is Gabby.

  72. 72.

    RadioOne

    There are delusional idiots out there on the internet who think that Obama is going to get a 5-7 point bounce from the convention, and actually believe that the lead will widen after the debates.

    We have to tamp these expectations down now. Almost everyone made up their minds months ago,and it’s going to be a close election.

  74. 74.

    Death Panel Truck

    @RadioOne: Concern troll is vewwy, vewwy concerned. Nobody believes a 5-7 percent bounce is in any way conceivable, and minds will definitely change once Obama carpet-bombs Rmoney in the debates.

  76. 76.

    mai naem

    So, I guess this means y’all aren’t going to to Morning Ho tomorrow. I am a wittle disappointed. Oh, well. I heard the USA! USA! USA! and I figured John wasn’t going to like that. Hey, at least they weren’t shaking their finger foam sticks.

  77. 77.

    jonas

    @Anya: If she’s such a nobody whom nobody would ever even notice because she’s so folksy and so ‘not elite’ and the little, insignificant governor of some BFE state, why the fuck was she ever qualified to be the vice president of the US?

  78. 78.

    hep kitty

    Well, as everyone knows, I’m not a huge Kerry fan but that was a good speech. I just wish he’d ease off the botox a bit.

  81. 81.

    Ben Cisco

    @Spaghetti Lee: This from another board I frequent:

    I posted this link and facebook and some woman went crazy and told people it was true and even shared it and others joined her. Said they KNEW it was a FACT.
    __
    HOW? WHY? could people think this was true, she told me with all the LIES people talk about Romney this is the fact they are trying to hide.
    __
    I said “Like the fact Romney is a Mormon AND NOT a Christian and his dad was born in Mexico”, she told me that was a lie and made up by MSNBC I’m not kidding. I was blown away!

  83. 83.

    patrick

    via twitter here is a pic of a distinctly un-angry looking ABL and the girls. She let the girls out and they decided they wanted a drink, or so she says.

    nice….JC, did she let you play motorboat?

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