(Mike Luckovich via GoComics.com)
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Dave Weigel and Doghouse Riley are both on my daily-read list, but this is too entertaining not to share:
Charles Ponzi Didn’t Think Big Enough
Shorter Dave Weigel: The fact that Mitt Romney is an idiot is no reason to think he’s an asshole.Really, that’s his fucking argument…
…[T]he fact that Mitt Romney has, over the course of a particularly dispiriting seven-year campaign, learned to mouth pro-Israel, make that “pro-Israel”, inanities about the Middle East, the better to infuse an important part of the Republican coalition–“scripturally and historically-mazed Armaggasmists”–and put it in a book–does not make those ideas, well, ideas. It’s too much to ask that either major party candidate actually lay down some actual history of the Middle East, or underline the distinction between mythical Israelites and modern Israelis. A distinction, one adds, which gets more play in Israel than it does in the Freest Nation on Earth. What we can ask for, beg and plead for, even pray for, if we’re in the mood, is that the American voter not manage to elect another Jebus-mazed Second-Cummer like George W. Bush. You remember George W., don’t you Dave?
An American Presidential candidate who waves his Glorious Imaginary Sword at crowds in I-o-way convinced he’s hastening the culmination of Inerrant Scripture is not, simply is not, fit or safe to be President. I don’t care that Mitt Romney tried to make hay of this situation. Fair’s fair; it’d be nice if our Commentariat took that to heart, too. That he wound up eating a shitburger is unquestioned; the fact that it was judged as such, and immediately, is all the proof one needs, or can ever obtain. It was a colossal mistake on Romney’s part. Not to turn events into a political weapon in the late days of a campaign, but to be such an idiot about deadly serious matters in the first place. Mitt Romney made a mistake on the Campaign Trail? Dog bites Man. But you might at least have the decency to admit it, rather than pretend he’s been error-free and packed with substance like a jelly doughnut to this point. Romney’s a flying-saucer-level religious nut who managed to hide that successfully enough to cram his pockets full of cash. Which argument, of course, assumes “flying-saucer-level religious nut” is an actual drawback in economic circles. If he’s more than that, please tell us. And tell the multi-million-dollar team of his, too. Romney’s Yet Another Republican pledging to do Lukudnik business given the chance. And Romney–who has pretty much answered the question of whether his intelligence quotient exceeds that of the last two governors to run on Republican tickets–the answer is No, by the way–has managed to evince no underlying grasp of the realities which might allow us to chalk his stance up to simple Republican politicking. The real gaffe is that Mitt Romney makes less sense when he says what he means than when he channels Moroni.
Speaking of “What could possibly go wrong?” ideas — Hair Force One! Per NYMag:
Mitt Romney’s campaign is holding a contest that will award two winners a day aboard “Hair Force One” with Mitt….
Although the entry page asks for a minimum $15 contribution, people can enter the contest without actually making a donation….
A normally cynical political observer would assume the Romney campaign would have safeguards in place to weed out pranksters, but this is the Mitt Romney campaign. (I think DougJ just noticed a great disturbance in the force.) Surely we can come up with some worthwhile suggestions for ways that the winner of this fine prize can entertain themselves on a caffeine-free, alcohol-free, all-day tour with a planeful of bored reporters and a constant Secret Service presence…
Baud
If Mitt actually came up with name “Hair Force One,” it’s the wittiest — and only worthwhile — thing he has ever said.
raven
Mornin Joe and Halperin are back on track. Saying that Egypt is “not an ally and not a enemy” was a BIG mistake.
eta, they are ripping Mitt again.
Baud
@raven:
Good. I’m happy to hear that that rift in the space-time continuum has healed.
Soshy
I can’t top the person who suggested ‘The Hindenburg’.
As for Weigel, I used to watch him on Countdown and was always struck by the extreme care he showed before putting his thoughts to words. Having read a bit more from him, I’d say that’s a good inclination.
raven
“The Romney Campaign is engaging in political malpractice”!
mj
SFAW
@raven:
Fixed to reflect Your Modern Republican Party more accurately.
Insomniac
Sorry OT…but “Israelites” = Desmond Dekker: http://youtu.be/r5JHGi0awgc
That is all. Carry on. :-)
JPL
Mitt is going to be on GMA. Who wants to volunteer to watch it? I heard the teaser last night and that was enough for me.
JWR
OT: TPM has a story up right now about Romney claiming the Libya attack never would’ve happened if he were President(!) And to top that off, Romney is getting ready to receive the customary intelligence briefings. Wouldn’t giving this guy any sensitive info be considered presidential malpractice?
cmm
One of my FB friends, someone I knew in high school, has turned into quite a winger and occasionally argues with me in comments about what I say or quotes I post. Which is fine. But in discussing the attacks on the embassies she also said that Egypt is rearming the Sinai and the US is giving them financial assistance to do it. I can’t find anything about this that isn’t from a crazy site. Does anyone know anything about this? If true it is rather alarming.
amk
@cmm: Ask her to show the money or STFU.
Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason
Did anyone else notice that Lukovich drew that smirk perfectly?
danielx
Well, Mormons do play poker, so there’s always that. Difficult to bluff someone who claims Nephi guides his hand, though….
Kirbster
Willard Romney’s whole campaign is predicated on the notion that his chief qualification for the most political office on earth is that he’s not a politician. Why anyone finds this argument persuasive baffles me. It’s like hiring a house painter to rewire your house because he’s not an electrician.
tjmn
@Kirbster:
Good one. And saving money to boot. Or to Mitt as the case may be.
arguingwithsignposts
@Kirbster:
Which is pretty ironic given that he’s spent the last 10 years (at least) of his life running for office.
Valdivia
@raven:
glad they are back on track. It turns out that after Obama said that the MB and the Govt of Egypt right quick got the message and stopped agitating against us and apologized. Hmmm, if that is big mistake I hope Obama keeps doing them.
Snarki, child of Loki
Paging “Hank, the angry drunken dwarf”!
Maude
Romney is a carbon copy of Reagan. Look at what he is doing. He is using the same tools(Yes, in the negative meaning of the word) to try and defeat Obama.
Cervantes
@Kirbster:
You’re thinking of politicians as people with a useful skill. Romney is using the term the way his base uses it: as a pejorative, pure and simple yet false and contemptuous of democracy.
The Ancient Randonneur
The FSM has already given us beer. Is it possible the FSM would allow DougJ to win such a monumental moment for all of us who love and worship the Pastafarian diety? I would eat every strand of overcooked pasta from now until eternity to live during that time!
With next Wednesday being International Talk Like A Pirate Day I can only dream of such a glorious happenstance.
Suffern ACE
@Kirbster: He’s run for office constantly for 25 years!
Hawes
The Error-plane
Snakes on a plane
Air Seamus
Aerostiff
The Mousse Goose
Swiss Air
Con Air
and my two favorites
Luftwaffle
Air Force 1%
There, saved you a trip to Wonkette.
maya
OOO! OOO! I know! In place of the oxygen masks there will be a drop-down Etch-a Sketch for the whinner to wile away the hours on HF1.
Judas Escargot, Acerbic Prophet of the Mighty Potato God
@cmm:
It’s their new meme:
Embassy -> Iran 1979/80 -> Jimmy Carter -> (Romney == Reagan).
It’s going around on Facebook and Twitter, so it must be the latest thing that the secret underground labs have come up with and distributed via email.
Related: I’ve reached a point in life where I can’t really waste hours every weeknight watching MSNBC (and also don’t really need to), but I did lapse into the old habit last night.
Chris Matthews, talking about the Libyan embassy attack with Chuck Todd and also A Very Serious Man With Very Nice Hair, blurted out “well what are you supposed to do? fire at the crowds? You can’t do that when you’re an embassy in the host country, you just can’t” and the double-take on Todd’s face when confronted with an impulse borne of basic human decency on national television was priceless. Look it up if you can. I rewound and rewatched three times, so I don’t think I imagined it.
OT: Meanwhile, Ezra Klein’s been on fire subbing on the Ed Show. I prefer his TV work to his column, frankly. Get this kid his own show, pronto.
Joel
Nevermind that Libya is actually acting like an ally, and that the people who committee the attack are enemies of the government.
Egypt on the other hand… But as the other Cole mentioned, the “not an ally” comment forced Morsi’s hand.
StarStorm
I think a better name for the plane would be “Dushbagh”.
StringOnAStick
How about “Bushwah”?
N W Barcus
That’s a pretty back-handed insult to people who believe in flying saucers — far more people have seen flying saucers (or Bigfoot for that matter) than have even seen the mythical “free market”, and their reports are far less credulous.
jwb
@raven: Ha, so Obama’s statement has the whole press corps and the GOP rounding to defend the US relationship with Egypt. Interesting what Obama did there.