Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

That meeting sounds like a shotgun wedding between a shitshow and a clusterfuck.

Innocent people do not delay justice.

Marge, god is saying you’re stupid.

You come for women, you’re gonna get your ass kicked.

“Alexa, change the president.”

Republicans got rid of McCarthy. Democrats chose not to save him.

We’re watching the self-immolation of the leading world power on a level unprecedented in human history.

It may be funny to you motherfucker, but it’s not funny to me.

The “burn-it-down” people are good with that until they become part of the kindling.

… pundit janitors mopping up after the gop

Books are my comfort food!

The republican ‘Pastor’ of the House is an odious authoritarian little creep.

I’m more christian than these people and i’m an atheist.

When you’re in more danger from the IDF than from Russian shelling, that’s really bad.

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

Republican also-rans: four mules fighting over a turnip.

Also, are you sure you want people to rate your comments?

And now I have baud making fun of me. this day can’t get worse.

He wakes up lying, and he lies all day.

Bark louder, little dog.

Petty moves from a petty man.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires.

The arc of the moral universe does not bend itself. it is up to us to bend it.

New McCarthy, same old McCarthyism.

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159Comments

  7. 7.

    BGinCHI

    At least buy me a drink, sailor.

    Been away from the computer for a couple days. What did I miss?

    Cole pay people to come over so it looked like he had friends or what?

  10. 10.

    Hal

    Also, I can only imagine how despairing it must be to Romney’s campaign to know that any possibility he has of winning rests with him basically demolishing Obama in the first debate, which let’s face reality, simply isn’t going to happen. Plus, if Obama nails it, the rest of the debates will be a cake walk.

    We’ll know how well it goes if Romney decides to cancel the second or maybe third debate to “focus on America.”

  16. 16.

    jwb

    @Comrade Jake: At least on that one, I’ll give them credit for a potentially unified plot. So much of RWNJ discourse is just kitchen sink incoherence. This one would at least unite a number of the conspiracy threads.

  24. 24.

    dance around in your bones

    @Baud:

    If I know Balloon Juice, we’re about to get 5 new posts in about a 10-minute span. You can complain about that.

    True, dat. Oh hell, if we couldn’t bitch about shit, it wouldn’t be BJ.

  30. 30.

    dance around in your bones

    @jwb:

    Hell, we’d figure out a reason to bitch if the number of threads was just right.

    Or just the right height.

  31. 31.

    jwb

    Kind of hoping Political Observer wanders over from the other thread and starts trolling here. RW trolls are good for endless amusement these days.

  32. 32.

    Hal

    @efgoldman:

    Historically, who won or lost the debates has never moved the numbers.

    That’s what I’ve been reading lately. It’s funny because there is this absolute “truth” out there that even if you’re having a bad campaign the debates can change that, and turn your campaign in the right direction. False hopes.

  35. 35.

    Baud

    We had a lot of fun with the whole Romney “zinger” strategy, but I think during the debate we’ll all be like, “Was that it? Was that the zinger? I can’t tell.”

  36. 36.

    Maude

    @jwb:
    They get a gold star for this. Them WMD is waiting to be found.
    I swear, every single lose in the US became Republican. None of them has anything worth taking about as far as accomplishments.

  40. 40.

    suzanne

    I can’t, Doug. I won’t be young forever. Hell, I’m not young NOW, considering that I just bought hair dye for my roots. I hate getting old. I like that the older I get, the less of a shit I give, but on balance, it is teh suck.

  42. 42.

    Helen

    @Comrade Jake: In one of the Susie Sampson Tea Party videos she asked why the the WMDs were never found and a teabagger responded – I shit you not – “They’re in Siberia.” That’s them in a nutshell.

  43. 43.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @Baud: Zinger Bingo! also, too, drink every time Willard says “apologize” and “one HUN-dred per cent of American!”

  45. 45.

    Violet

    @Southern Beale: My neighborhood has quite the mix of signs. Some Obama signs. Some “Vote Democrat” signs. A Romney sign or two. Very mixed. If I lived in a swing state, someone would be after my neighborhood for sure. As it is, I live in a very safe district for my Rep, so don’t get bothered much.

  47. 47.

    Loneoak

    Someone on my local fB page (I live in a rural mountain town) has posted a new conspiracy theory I had never heard of: quantitative environmental easing. It’s all about Agenda 21 coming to take our land. But I had never seen that little portmanteau of mushed together winger fever dreams (apparently, neither has Google).

  48. 48.

    dance around in your bones

    @suzanne:

    I like that the older I get, the less of a shit I give, but on balance, it is teh suck.

    Hell, I feel the same way lately, like “who gives a fuck?” Let my grey cap rock on, baby!

    But then I give in and dye the sucker.

    I am so weak.

  49. 49.

    The Fat Kate Middleton

    @jwb: Whut? I’m confused. I thought Political Observer was here. This is a DougJ thread, right? I’m expecting that little piece of performance art to show up right around comment #120 here.

  52. 52.

    Baud

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    I think that’s Romney’s problem. He needs a cool catch phrase we can drink to. Like “Whachatalkingabout, Obama?” Or “One of these days, pow! Right in the kisser.” Or “Missed it by that much.” Maybe by the third debate, they’ll come up with something.

  55. 55.

    Hal

    @beltane:

    How cute, Mitt Romney already has his transition team in place

    Just think how many people are sending those campaign calls straight to voicemail. “Gosh, I’d love to be Secretary of State, but I actually have an interview at Google next week. Fingers crossed!”

  59. 59.

    dance around in your bones

    @Violet: I already did that back in the 80’s.

    I feel like I would be repeating myself :)

    At least I let it grow down to my ass. I don’t care what anyone thinks.

  61. 61.

    JoyfulA

    @Violet: I’ve been in a full-leg binder for 5 weeks and haven’t seen much of the real world. But I watched carefully on the way to the doc’s last week. Total bumper stickers: 1 McCain/Palin.

    Inhabitants of this red county don’t seem motivated.

  64. 64.

    jwb

    @Violet: Hardly a political sign in my neighborhood at all. One for a GOP state representative a couple of blocks over, a couple along the main access road for the GOP county commissioner and one for a libertarian candidate for county commissioner. That’s it. Very spooky.

  65. 65.

    Dennis SGMM

    @dance around in your bones:

    Growing old isn’t so bad. Think of the history that we’ve seen. For instance, I’ve seen my nation go from being terrified of the commies and willing to surrender their civil liberties out of fear to being terrified of AQ and being willing to surrender their civil liberties out of fear.

    Wait, that didn’t come right…

  66. 66.

    dance around in your bones

    @Violet: Plaid shirts with ripped sleeves!

    Actually, I remember (many MANY years ago) saying that I would like to wear a jumpsuit every day. Just for the simplicity (Star Trekkian?) but it was the sleeve in the toilet thing that did away with that idea.

  67. 67.

    Violet

    @JoyfulA: I do not know what a full-leg binder is, but it sounds uncomfortable. I hope soon you aren’t in it.

    Mentioned this a few weeks ago, but I was in Utah for almost a week a few weeks ago. Flew into Salt Lake, then got a car and went out of the city for a bit. Did not see one single Romney bumper sticker, yard sign or sign of any kind while I was there. Not on a car on a freeway, not in someone’s yard. Just, nothing. There were signs for local elections. Saw an Orrin Hatch billboard. But nothing for Romney.

    Just struck me as odd. If there’s anywhere I’d expect Romney to have support, it’s Utah. I know people there will vote for him and the state will go for him, but even so, I’d expect a few supporters to be proudly displaying his signs and stickers, etc., just to show solidarity if nothing else. Not. A. One.

  69. 69.

    Gex

    (Cross post – was so late to the other thread)

    Had a state representative knock on my door today. She had a list of registered voters at the house. Off the bat I asked her what her stance was on the MN marriage amendment. She was very proud to say she voted to put it on the ballot.

    I pretty much said “We’re done here.” Much better than the neck punch I wanted to give her.

    Later, I realized that a Republican had just found out that this registered voter is not on her side. These days, I figure I’ll want to check my registration. Checked online after she left and I was. I doubt that I’ll get purged, but it would be awesome if I caught the actual candidate herself engaging in this crap.

  70. 70.

    Polish the Guillotines

    @efgoldman: Considering where the A’s started in spring training and where they are now, I’m not sure the O’s had less to work with.

    Still, I wouldn’t burn Showalter in effigy if he won.

    What I truly hope for is the O’s and A’s to actually win their respective divisions outright. It would fit the times.

  71. 71.

    suzanne

    @dance around in your bones: I recently got sick of mine being long and hacked it all off. I want to just say fuck it and dye it green again, but my work is all NATURAL HAIR COLORS ONLY BLAH BLAH BLAH and I am a puppet of The Man now so I do what Christian Grey tells me to do, or something.

  72. 72.

    dance around in your bones

    @Dennis SGMM: Heh.

    I know, I lived through the JFK, MLK, RFK and etc assassinations back in the day (like you). I thought the damn world was falling apart.

    It just gets better and better, Ha! However, like suzanne says, I just don’t give so much of a fuck anymore.

    I will survive. The world will go on without me someday.

  77. 77.

    suzanne

    @Violet: I LOVED grunge. It was like all of a sudden society thought it would be awesome to wear flannel PJs everywhere. THEY WERE RIGHT.

    I had a flannel that I LOVED as a teen. My mother still talks about how ugly it was. LMAO. So I didn’t get laid in high school. Whatever.

  78. 78.

    Violet

    @suzanne:

    but my work is all NATURAL HAIR COLORS ONLY BLAH BLAH BLAH

    Really? That’s actually in the employee guidelines? Maybe you could dye it grey. That’s all the rage right now, and it’s “natural.”

  79. 79.

    dance around in your bones

    @suzanne: Jesus Fuck, companies have an ‘All Natural Hair Colors’ policy?

    You live in AZ, right? I lived there for a while(Tucson) and contemplated shaving my head, it was so fucking hot.

    Instead, I just lived in the swimming pool. Bats used to swoop around it at night, pretty cool.

  80. 80.

    suzanne

    @Violet: ROMPERS for GROWN-ASS WOMEN are in all the stores. Proof of the apocalypse there. I’m sorry, this ain’t “Honey Boo Boo”. Fuck that.

  81. 81.

    Little Boots

    why aren’t people mocking doug. he is mockable.

    you khwn what we need? omnes?

    can I do this thing?

  82. 82.

    Violet

    @suzanne: Flannel everything may have worked in Seattle, but I live in a hot climate and…ugh. I guess in the winter it’s doable, but summer, no way.

  83. 83.

    JoyfulA

    @Violet: It’s like a mid-thigh to ankle cast, but it opens with Velcro straps for wound inspection. Modern, I guess. Getting in a car is very tricky with that leg that doesn’t bend.

    My sister says she has an Obama yard sign and a bumper sticker, but I wasn’t by her house.

  85. 85.

    suzanne

    @Violet: Oh yes, that is in the employee guidelines. And I don’t need to dye it gray. All I need to do is STOP dyeing it, and it will be gray. Actually, I’m only a little bit gray, like maybe 5% max, but it’s enough that it’s noticeable, because my natural hair color is dark brown, and so the gray stands out.

  88. 88.

    Helen

    @DougJ: DING DING DING. I turned 50 2 weeks ago. I am PSYCHED that I am 50. My family has a history of people dying early. OK, the “ouch my bones hurt” and “crap I can’t see that” is not great. But the alternative is way worse.

  89. 89.

    Phylllis

    @Violet:

    Maybe you could dye it grey. That’s all the rage right now, and it’s “natural.”

    Heh. I stopped coloring my hair back in January and I can’t tell you how many women have asked me who is now doing my ‘frosting’ job. Almost all of them thought my died color was my natural color.

  92. 92.

    suzanne

    @Violet: I live in Phoenix and I still rocked flannel. I had some T-shirt-weight ones for summer, which were too hot for outside and ended up tied around my waist, but were perfect indoors, as the prevailing wisdom in Phoenix seems to be to over-cool every enclosed place in the summer as if it were a meat locker.

  94. 94.

    Violet

    @efgoldman: Yeah, I get that in MA and RI for Obama. But Romney is the first Mormon presidential nominee of a major party. That’s HUGE for the Mormons and Utah is Mormon ground zero. I just figured there would be some visible support out of religious pride or something.

    Heck, Orrin Hatch is ahead in the polls by 30 points and still has a huge billboard on the way to the airport.

  95. 95.

    The Fat Kate Middleton

    @jwb: I know. I’m just suggesting, in my usual clumsy way, that PO might be DougJ. I can’t decide if I want that to be true.

  97. 97.

    Pen

    Damn Doug, for once I get your lyric choice and it has to be a creepy “clueless and carefree homecoming sex” song. Figures. :-(

  98. 98.

    Violet

    @suzanne: I’d be all for flannel making a comeback. But not rompers. Are you fucking KIDDING ME? Fuckin’ Honey Boo Boo land and we’re all just living in it.

  100. 100.

    Dennis SGMM

    @efgoldman:
    In 2008 my white-bread SoCal town was festooned with thickets of McCain-Palin yard signs. Most of the SUVs sported M-P bumper stickers. This year I’ve counted three R-R yard signs and seen only one lonely bumper sticker. This in a town that thought that David Dreier was just the bee’s knees.

  102. 102.

    dance around in your bones

    @suzanne:

    as the prevailing wisdom in Phoenix seems to be to over-cool every enclosed place in the summer as if it were a meat locker.

    Well, gawddang, ya gotta do that to survive there! I remember we had to cover the steering wheel so it didn’t give us second-degree burns later on, AND Tucson was the only place I ever saw with water mister-y thingamajoos in the malls. Just so you didn’t expire from the heat.

    The transition from inside (air-conditioned) to outside (NOT) could be brutal.

  104. 104.

    suzanne

    @dance around in your bones: Yes, my company has an “all natural hair colors” policy. They also have a fairly stringent dress code. It’s a pretty conservative company. I mostly like it, so I don’t get too bent out of shape about it. And I do show up with black nail polish from time to time.

  105. 105.

    jebediah

    First time on the site with my new phone. I’m all up to date now… now I just need to look into whether or not I can get the pie filter on this. I have only pie’d one person, but it makes those threads much better.
    So now lets see if I can post this comment –

  106. 106.

    Dennis SGMM

    @efgoldman:
    My hypothesis is that there are so many veteran troll rippers in this place that the real thing dare not raise its misshapen head more than once.

  108. 108.

    suzanne

    @dance around in your bones: I hate it! The human comfort zone is between 70 and 74! In the summer, lots of places turn it down to 60! So outside is like the surface of the goddamn sun, and inside is so cold I gotta wear a padded bra or get REALLY popular. Pisses me off.

  113. 113.

    Violet

    @suzanne: I live in a warm climate too. Don’t bother taking a jacket or sweater along in the winter unless it’s actually cold outside. In the summer, it’s mandatory. Inside temps are freezing. Ridiculous. Not to mention expensive and wasteful.

  115. 115.

    RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist

    @efgoldman:

    All the way to where?

    Home, in my case. All the way from Mexico City. No earthquakes or volcanoes at the moment. I can deal with that. Politics can wait.

  121. 121.

    Geoduck

    @Phylllis:

    Heh. I stopped coloring my hair back in January and I can’t tell you how many women have asked me who is now doing my ‘frosting’ job. Almost all of them thought my died color was my natural color.

    Heck, go all the way and dye it bone-white.

    Political sign report for my town in WA state: a sprinkling of Obama/Biden signs, none for Romney, lots for more local races. (We just may end up with #%@!ing Scott Walker clone for governor..)

  123. 123.

    ColleenMary

    We’ve got tons of Obama lawn signs in my neighborhood (Minneapolis), plus a few “We are the 99%” still up. My very very favorite is a hand-lettered sign, scrawled sloppily at a goofy angle with a random assortment of upper- and lower-case letters, that says ” ObaMA OuR SAvioR”

  124. 124.

    dance around in your bones

    @Violet: Gads, I remember flying to the East Coast in the ‘winter’ and being so frickin’ cold.

    I had a t-shirt type jacket, and my friend said “Why didn’t you bring a REAL coat?” And I said I don’t OWN one! I live in SoCal, fer Pete’s sake.”

    Froze my ass off.

  131. 131.

    RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist

    @efgoldman:

    I may end up back in Mexico as early as next week. Expensive stuff has gone all cockeyed and sideways & needs put right. I’m packed just in case. I gotta learn how to get a night’s sleep away from home. After 4 days of being awake 20+ hours a day I’m zombied out.

    I’m counting on BJ to post a live stream of the debate. I wouldn’t miss this for the world and I can’t count on the Mexican network(s?) to carry it live.

  135. 135.

    RossInDetroit, Rational Subjectivist

    @Dennis SGMM:

    Oh, Jesus don’t get me started on air travel. But that reminds me I have to inventory my modest luggage and see what the Mexican TSA-equivalent has left me. I pack with care, they toss with abandon.

  136. 136.

    Yutsano

    @Dennis SGMM: Opted for leftovers. I was gonna go ambitious and do creamed chicken on biscuits but my inner lassitude won out. Plus I made really good sloppy joes for work the other day and I just re-heated with a few debated recipe queaks. Will definitely incorporate next time I make!

  138. 138.

    Jebediah

    @Yutsano:

    So far so good!

    Yeah, although I am typing this on a computer – haven’t figured out quoting or refreshing yet. But at least I no longer have a phone that is years out of date, and I can read Balloon Juice mobile-ly without getting all frustrated. Woo-hoo!

  141. 141.

    Uncle Cosmo

    @Polish the Guillotines:

    What I truly hope for is the O’s and A’s to actually win their respective divisions outright. It would fit the times.

    And it would avoid the bittersweet scenario in which one of the two AL Cinderellas has the clock strike midnight after a single playoff game. This Balmer boy would rather watch the Skanks & Strangers sweating that one out between themselves while your A’s & my O’s took the day off.

  142. 142.

    Dennis SGMM

    @Belafon (formerly anonevent):

    I followed the show from the first Dr. Who (John Pertwee)all the way through David Tennant. When Matt Smith took over the role I found myself less and less interested in watching.

    I just couldn’t warm up to Smith as The Doctor.

  147. 147.

    Belafon (formerly anonevent)

    @Dennis SGMM: I like Matt personally a lot better than I like David, even though lots of people really like David. But then again, I don’t always like stories where the hero gets everything right or has all the answers.

  149. 149.

    askew

    I’ve come home tonight to find another centipede in my house. I think I have crossed the line into an infestation and am afraid I am going to have to call an exterminator. I hate to put all those chemicals into my house. Does anyone have any other solutions or am I worrying about the chemicals for no reason?

  150. 150.

    suzanne

    @WaterGirl: Sort of, but with shorts, and no snap crotch. As a toddler in the eighties, I know my mother dressed me in rompers. They’re acceptable, if a bit dated, on young’uns like that. On teenagers and adults, they are an abomination.

  151. 151.

    suzanne

    @askew: I use an organic exterminator. They use diatomaceous earth and other natural stuff. I don’t know if it works on centipedes, but might be worth a shot.

  152. 152.

    askew

    @suzanne:

    Ah, I didn’t know such a thing existed. I’ll try to find an organic exterminator. Not sure how much they’ll be able to do as I am in a townhouse unit and I am not sure I can spray on my lawn, etc.

  154. 154.

    different-church-lady

    @Southern Beale:

    Tonight I made the bold move of moving my Obama sign out of the yard and toward the sidewalk. Let’s see how long it stays there.

    Before you know it, it will be taking the bus all by itself and going to college.

    And the cat’s in the cradle, and the silver spoon…

  155. 155.

    Starlit

    @jwb: Apart from a number of Obama bumper stickers–which may or may not refer to the current campaign–there is almost nothing showing in my neighborhood, either. Sighting a Romney-Ryan sign or bumper sticker is more exciting than finding an out-of-state license plate.

  156. 156.

    Yutsano

    @Dennis SGMM: Patrick Troughton was the Doctor in between Hartnell and Pertwee but a lot of those tapes were unfortunately destroyed. Which is really unfortunate because what is left of the Troughton years shows how Pertwee synthesised both the former Doctors yet put his own impression on the character.

  159. 159.

    WaterGirl

    @askew: Well, that may mean that the advice I was about to give will not be helpful, but…

    I frequently get spiders in my house, and while I am not thrilled with them, a few spiders don’t bother me enough to want chemicals in the house, especially with dogs and cats. But my niece was visiting and bugs really freak her out, so I called the exterminators and had them spray the OUTSIDE perimeter of my house, and the crawl space, and the yard. I figured it was better than spraying inside, and it did the trick.

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