• Menu
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Before Header

  • About Us
  • Lexicon
  • Contact Us
  • Our Store
  • ↑
  • ↓
  • ←
  • →

Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Republicans: The threats are dire, but my tickets are non-refundable!

A snarling mass of vitriolic jackals

The gop is a fucking disgrace.

The republican speaker is a slippery little devil.

GOP baffled that ‘we don’t care if you die’ is not a winning slogan.

These days, even the boring Republicans are nuts.

Authoritarian republicans are opposed to freedom for the rest of us.

… pundit janitors mopping up after the gop

Dear legacy media: you are not here to influence outcomes and policies you find desirable.

If a good thing happens for a bad reason, it’s still a good thing.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

They were going to turn on one another at some point. It was inevitable.

Dumb motherfuckers cannot understand a consequence that most 4 year olds have fully sorted out.

Anne Laurie is a fucking hero in so many ways. ~ Betty Cracker

Republicans in disarray!

“What are Republicans afraid of?” Everything.

I might just take the rest of the day off and do even more nothing than usual.

Petty moves from a petty man.

If you cannot answer whether trump lost the 2020 election, you are unfit for office.

the 10% who apparently lack object permanence

Only Democrats have agency, apparently.

Just because you believe it, that does not make it true.

Rupert, come get your orange boy, you petrified old dinosaur turd.

Peak wingnut was a lie.

Mobile Menu

  • 4 Directions VA 2025 Raffle
  • 2025 Activism
  • Donate with Venmo, Zelle & PayPal
  • Site Feedback
  • War in Ukraine
  • Submit Photos to On the Road
  • Politics
  • On The Road
  • Open Threads
  • Topics
  • Authors
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Lexicon
  • Our Store
  • Politics
  • Open Threads
  • 2025 Activism
  • Garden Chats
  • On The Road
  • Targeted Fundraising!
You are here: Home / Elections / Election 2012 / Tonight’s Fun Time Laugh Parade

Tonight’s Fun Time Laugh Parade

by @heymistermix.com|  October 16, 20128:51 am| 47 Comments

This post is in: Election 2012

FacebookTweetEmail

We’ll be up and running on the CoverItLive machine around 8:30 tonight. I sent any front pager who participated last time an invite. Hopefully Joe Patrice will also liveblog in a post without comments so we can hear what a real debate expert has to say. Joe has an interesting post up about how Obama should handle the Benghazi question, which was written before Hillary took the blame but is still relevant.

Mark Halperin finally did something useful and dug up the debate rules. Here are some highlights from Elspeth Reeve at the Atlantic (via OTB):

No reaction shots. “To the best of the Commission’s abilities, there will be no TV cut-aways to any candidate who is not responding to a question while another candidate is answering a question or to a candidate who is not giving a closing statement while another candidate is doing so.” TV guys, you so broke this rule.

The town hall will be strictly regulated. In the town hall debate Tuesday, Candy Crowley “shall select the questioners, but she may not ‘coach’ the questioners.” Questioners cannot ad lib their questions. Crowley cannot ask follow-ups. If a questioner tries to as a follow-up, they will cut off his microphone.

No show of hands. This could be because Obama keeps attacking Romney for raising his hand at a Republican primary debate when the candidates were asked whether they’d take a deal that was 10 parts spending cuts to 1 part tax increases. Or it’s just because those questions are inexact and frustrating.

No shout outs. The candidates are forbidden from calling out to a person in the audience unless it’s a family member.

No accessories. Romney is not allowed to bring his PowerPoint or any other “tangible things.”

No direct questions. Obama and Romney aren’t supposed to ask each other stuff, like “What about the Dingell-Norwood bill?”

No demanding anyone take a pledge.

No audience clapping.

No sweat. “The Commission shall use best efforts to maintain an appropriate temperature as agreed to by the campaigns.”

As in many other things in life, rules so goddam stupid and overcomplicated end up being broken on the fly as both candidates push and the moderator does what s/he thinks best.

FacebookTweetEmail
Previous Post: « Chill Out About the Women
Next Post: Preparing for the Next Lie »

Reader Interactions

47Comments

  1. 1.

    barath

    October 16, 2012 at 8:59 am

    As I mentioned in another thread, Crowley has never met a GOP talking point she doesn’t like, so if she injects herself into the debate, it’s to throw the debate for Romney…

    Meanwhile, Paul Ryan has been doing some volunteering:

    boomantribune.com/story/2012/10/16/8140/9796

  2. 2.

    Hunter Gathers

    October 16, 2012 at 9:01 am

    A good drinking game would involve chugging a beer every time Crowley says ‘Some people say’. You’ll be praying to the porcelain goddess before the first commercial.

  3. 3.

    Zandar

    October 16, 2012 at 9:08 am

    Too bad Dickwhisperer immediately followed up that useful thing he did by awarding Romney the states of Florida, North Carolina, Virginia and Ohio, setting off another week of DEMS IN DISARRAY.

  4. 4.

    amk

    October 16, 2012 at 9:09 am

    @Hunter Gathers: Is that cow allowed to ask such stupid questions ? I thought she was supposed to be justa post box for audience questions.

  5. 5.

    Ash Can

    October 16, 2012 at 9:09 am

    @barath: I don’t like the fact that she’s the one choosing the questions. Look for Romney to be asked what his favorite color is and for Obama to be asked to recite Joyce’s Ulysses by heart.

  6. 6.

    comrade scott's agenda of rage

    October 16, 2012 at 9:09 am

    @barath:

    if she injects herself into the debate, it’s to throw the debate for Romney…

    She’s already yammering about doing exactly that:
    dailykos.com/story/2012/10/15/1144881/-In-pre-debate-planning-Candy-Crowley-and-the-Villagers-go-rog…

    The next time somebody says anything about a level playing field, I’ll point out the shitastic debate “moderators” this time around. Lehrer’s always been overrated and his performance last time finally let people see the man behind the curtain. Crowley, as noted above, is a Repup stenographer on a good day. Schieffer is on par with Lehrer.

    If Candeeeee decides to ignore the rules and interject herself into the process, the Prez better have his A-game running because it’ll be 2-On-1 up there on the stage.

  7. 7.

    Quarks

    October 16, 2012 at 9:10 am

    What’s wrong with follow up questions?

  8. 8.

    comrade scott's agenda of rage

    October 16, 2012 at 9:13 am

    @Quarks:

    The piece I link to over at Teh Orange goes into that a little bit:

    We know what the punditry thinks the common folk are interested in, things like the manufactured “fiscal cliff” and the scary just-rediscovered deficit monster and the like, but many of us have noticed that what the villagers obsess over and what the common rabble is interested in tend to be rather different things; to hear the Sunday talk show crowd, you would think that nobody in America gives a crap about whether or not they have a job tomorrow, so devoted are they to following the minutia of Washington’s latest invented slapfight. The advantage of a town hall format is that, ostensibly (these people are screened, after all, so we’ve already had the questions appropriately filtered to reflect what the press “thinks” ought to be asked) it is actual Americans asking actual questions that they presumably want to hear the actual answers to. Why the assumption, then, that the questions they will ask won’t be the proper ones, or won’t be asked the right way, or may need to be altered so as to not go over plowed ground? There is no plowed ground in this campaign, in large part because every time you ask Mitt Romney about his opinion on something, you’re as likely as not to get a completely different answer from the last time you asked him. (I hear tell there’s a popular video going around on that subject, perhaps that should be more widely aired.)

  9. 9.

    Anya

    October 16, 2012 at 9:15 am

    @amk: Not cool calling a woman a “cow” even if she’s a tool. You should know better.

  10. 10.

    Robin G.

    October 16, 2012 at 9:16 am

    Yay Joe Patrice! I want him to label the exact moment where Romney’s solvency crumbles to dust under the weight of Obama’s disads.

  11. 11.

    barath

    October 16, 2012 at 9:17 am

    Meanwhile, here’s a subtext for this election, if you thought the stakes couldn’t get higher:

    Similarly, the conservative political class recognizes that the halcyon days of shared growth, with the United States leading the world economy, may be over.
    __
    While Gordon projects a future of exacerbating inequality (as an ever-increasing share of declining productivity growth goes to the top), the wealthy are acutely aware that the political threat to their status and comfort would come from rising popular demand for policies of income redistribution. It is for this reason that the Republican Party is determined to protect the Bush tax cuts; to prevent tax hikes; to further cut domestic social spending; and, more broadly, to take a machete to the welfare state. Insofar as Republicans prevail in their twin aims of cutting – or even eliminating – social spending, and maintaining or lowering tax rates, they will have succeeded in obstructing the restoration of social insurance programs in the future.
    __
    Affluent Republicans – the donor and policy base of the conservative movement — are on red alert. They want to protect and enhance their position in a future of diminished resources.

    and

    3. As GDP per capita declined in the 4th and 5th centuries, the rulers knew that only one solution was possible, and today, the 1% are doing everything they can to re-institute that enlightened response: a return to feudalism.

  12. 12.

    Quarks

    October 16, 2012 at 9:17 am

    @comrade scott’s agenda of rage: Yeah, I can see putting some sort of time limit on the audience questions, or saying, ok, you have a max of three questions, but I can’t see any good reason for not letting an audience member ask a follow up question if either the person thought the question wasn’t really answered (which happens a lot in these debates) or if the answer to the question itself brought up more questions, which happens in real life conversations all the time.

  13. 13.

    mai naem

    October 16, 2012 at 9:18 am

    @barath: If you watch the Ryan video at the soup kitchen, it’s kind of disconcerting how non-chalantly he grabs the clean pans and starts washing it. He even manages to almost succeed in keeping the inside of the pan facing away from the camera. I just have to think he’s done it a bunch of times before to pull it off so smoothly. Also, they brought the aprons with them? Wow. These campaigns think of everything don’t they.

  14. 14.

    Keith G

    October 16, 2012 at 9:20 am

    Over the weekend on PBS I watched an ” animals in the wild” program who’s key element was a contest for dominance and leadership between two males. I was fascinated by the parallels. In such contests, nature seems to favor the tactics and displays of the more aggressive; yet, those traits may not be the best for the day to day running of the family group.

    In the case of this program (upper level mammals I’m not saying anything more), the more aggressive male did win and then overtime proceeded to dismantle what had been a long running success of the original family group. Territorial conflicts with neighboring family groups just took its toll on the increasingly ragged group of mammals

  15. 15.

    mai naem

    October 16, 2012 at 9:20 am

    @Zandar: Now you got me all confused I thought dickwhisperer was Dana Millbank. I thought Halperin was Atrios’ douchebag of the decade.

  16. 16.

    barath

    October 16, 2012 at 9:20 am

    @mai naem:

    I hear Joe Biden did a photo op the other week washing clean Trans Ams, so both sides do it.

  17. 17.

    Kane

    October 16, 2012 at 9:21 am

    Doesn’t Obama have to win this one so that the media can sell their Thrilla in Manila for next week?

  18. 18.

    comrade scott's agenda of rage

    October 16, 2012 at 9:26 am

    @Quarks:

    but I can’t see any good reason for not letting an audience member ask a follow up question if either the person thought the question wasn’t really answered (which happens a lot in these debates) or if the answer to the question itself brought up more questions, which happens in real life conversations all the time.

    Again, the piece I link to asks exactly that question. I know some folks here have a distaste for Teh Orange but the vast majority of the Front Pagers know their shit and it’s worth reading.

    Almost nothing else there is worth reading to include the comment section.

  19. 19.

    barath

    October 16, 2012 at 9:26 am

    @Keith G:

    You should check out Schneier’s recent book Liars and Outliars – it’s a fascinating exploration of that topic (and much more).

  20. 20.

    gogol's wife

    October 16, 2012 at 9:28 am

    @mai naem:

    Dickwhisperer is definitely Milbank. Halperin said it out loud on national television.

  21. 21.

    quannlace

    October 16, 2012 at 9:28 am

    You gotta love somebody named Elspeth.
    ******
    Aargh, what will I have for my background noise today? All the news channels will be ‘debate-debate-debate’ and all the public radio stations have started their begathons!
    Trapped!

  22. 22.

    Joe Patrice

    October 16, 2012 at 9:32 am

    For the record, I’m not sure Hilary’s statement changes the approach the President should take. In fact, I think it supercharges it. Now he can explain what we all should have known already — that the POTUS does not make individual staffing assignments for every facility in the world — while saying he accepts ultimate responsibility as the chief executive and that’s why he fought for more security and why he will never apologize for taking the aggressive steps to fight al Qaeda that angered these terrorists.

    AND I think this whole thing may be a big trap that Romney is waltzing into…Hilary accepts responsibility as the person who actually had a role and then the President jumping in and saying, “true, but I always bear ultimate responsibility” then becomes the tool for bludgeoning Mitt Romney as he tries to worm out of Bain Capital arguments saying, “I was the CEO still, but I’d left the day-to-day management of Bain.”

  23. 23.

    Princess

    October 16, 2012 at 9:40 am

    Honestly, I think Obama does better if Candy goes all in on Team Romney. He’s always better against an aggressive opponent. I think that was why he seemed somewhat passive in the first debate — Lehrer was too mushy. The worst interview I ever saw Obama give was with Olbermann. The best was when he took on the whole Republican congress. He’s better with hardballs than softballs.

  24. 24.

    Steve Crickmore

    October 16, 2012 at 10:00 am

    The candidates may not ask each other direct questions during any of the debates .

    That would be be very unpleasant in a presidential debate, in a republic. Candidates being able to ask each other a direct question, in which we might actually see the candidates engaged and learn something from their answers and questions.

    This prohibition pretty well nullifies the point of having a debate, unlike say, question period in the British House of Commons. No wonder, most of the time Obama looks like a grinning turkey up on stage, and Romney’s smile looks like it is ready to crack.

  25. 25.

    Central Planning

    October 16, 2012 at 10:07 am

    I think we should list some other rules of the debate.

    For example:

    Romney addressing Obama All responses must begin with “Ni*clang* please!”

  26. 26.

    Palli

    October 16, 2012 at 10:11 am

    Fundamental changes in the debate structure and “guidelines” (since rules are ignored) would make our country so much better informed. I liked many of Lawrence O’Donnell’s ideas last week, including, notes on the podium, advance questions (though the spectrum of politically media viable issues is pretty obvious now).

    videocafe.crooksandliars.com/heather/lawrence-odonnell-rewrites-rules-president

  27. 27.

    Robin G.

    October 16, 2012 at 10:21 am

    @Joe Patrice: Oooh. Oooh, I like that. Have I mentioned recently that you are awesome? Excuse me while I inappropriately fangirl.

  28. 28.

    amk

    October 16, 2012 at 10:32 am

    It’s finally here. The details of mittbot’s tax plan..

    It’s fabulous.

  29. 29.

    Villago Delenda Est

    October 16, 2012 at 10:34 am

    Crowley is Rethug scum. I’d say fuck her, but I wouldn’t fuck that skank with Mitt Romney’s small dick.

    That having been said, these rules are bullshit. We do not have ‘debates’. We have joint press conferences. I’d like the candidates to be given a question, then have a back and forth between them about the question. That of course will never happen, because Obama would kick Rmoney’s parasite ass all over the fucking stage and the horse race narrative would be annihilated in the process.

    Our media must be burned to the ground and rebuilt.

  30. 30.

    Robin G.

    October 16, 2012 at 10:35 am

    @amk: That is glorious. GLORIOUS.

  31. 31.

    catclub

    October 16, 2012 at 10:36 am

    No cut away shots are in the rules, but how about split screens? Golf announcers while they are answering? Gongs?

    Be creative here!

  32. 32.

    Villago Delenda Est

    October 16, 2012 at 10:38 am

    @mai naem:

    Halperin might be the douche of the decade, but the wanker of the decade is the Moustache of Understanding.

  33. 33.

    catclub

    October 16, 2012 at 10:39 am

    @Central Planning: So obama comes back with Honky and ‘whitebread’ ?

    Could be funny. Until Mitt Romney has the football with the nuclear codes and someone loses more than an eye.

  34. 34.

    Yutsano

    October 16, 2012 at 10:39 am

    @catclub: Entertainment people, ENTERTAINMENT!! Gotta get those eyeballs dontchaknow.

  35. 35.

    Villago Delenda Est

    October 16, 2012 at 10:48 am

    @Ash Can:

    Crowley (to Rmoney): He who would cross the bridge of death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see!

    Rmoney: Ask me the questions, bridgekeeper, I’m not afraid!

    Crowley: What is your name?

    Rmoney: Mitt Romney

    Crowley: What is your quest?

    Rmoney: To be President of the United States

    Crowley: What is your favorite color?

    Rmoney: Red

    Crowley: OK, off you go!

    Crowley (to Obama): STOP! He who would cross the bridge of death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see!

    Obama: Right, I’ve heard all that. Ask away.

    Crowley: What is your name?

    Obama: Barack HUSSEIN Obama.

    (Crowley shudders a bit on the “HUSSEIN” part)

    Crowley: What is your quest?

    Obama: To be win reelection to the Presidency.

    Crowley: What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?

    Obama: What do you mean? An African or European swallow?

    Crowley: What? I don’t know that….aieeeeeeeeeeeee!

    Biden: How do you know so much about swallows?

    Obama: Well, you have to know these sort of things when you’re a black President, you know…

  36. 36.

    Ash Can

    October 16, 2012 at 10:50 am

    @quannlace:

    Aargh, what will I have for my background noise today?

    If you like classical music, you could livestream WFMT, and if you like jazz you could livestream WDCB. :)

  37. 37.

    Kirbster

    October 16, 2012 at 10:52 am

    If those are the actual rules, why even have a live audience? Who cares if someone in the auditorium with a crappy microphone stands up to ask a pre-selected question? Candy Crowley will probably have to repeat the question anyway so that the candidates and people watching at home can hear it clearly. No applause? No reaction shots? Why do the candidates even have to be in the same city, much less on the same stage?

  38. 38.

    Ash Can

    October 16, 2012 at 10:53 am

    @amk: HAHAHAHAHA! And it’s a DNC site too! Love it!

  39. 39.

    amk

    October 16, 2012 at 10:58 am

    Updated Iowa early voting

    Total votes 241,178 (15.6% of 2008 votes)

    Dem 51.4%
    Rep 29.1%
    None/Others 19.5%

  40. 40.

    bcinaz

    October 16, 2012 at 11:03 am

    I liked these things better when they were run by the League of Women Voters and were, you know, debates.

  41. 41.

    LanceThruster

    October 16, 2012 at 11:30 am

    No coloring outside of the Kabuki dance lines.

  42. 42.

    LanceThruster

    October 16, 2012 at 11:44 am

    @bcinaz:

    So true. And I also miss the position statement comparisons done as they do in newspapers for the local elections.

    The LoWV should just put out an extensive blank questionnaire in grid form like a scorecard and let the voters fill in the blanks based on the answers/positions of the candidates (with amended/dated sections for candidate revisions – Mitten’s scribble sheet would highlight how he’s been all over the map).

    Prominence could be given to questions that deserve answers but were not asked by the MSM nor answered by the respective parties/candidates (this would have been nice/helpful during previous primaries in order to keep the views of the Ron Pauls and Ralph Naders from being marginalized/ignored).

    Furthermore, omissions could be spotlighted by opposition candidates such as drawing attention to what exactly OvenMitt could be hiding in his unreleased tax returns.

    I truly despise how poorly voters are served in the process, and we need to find some way collectively to demand an end to the pablum we’re spoon fed every election cycle.

  43. 43.

    vernonlee

    October 16, 2012 at 11:49 am

    @Quarks:

    Right!

    Also, too: It would be smart for Obama to ask follow-ups of the town hall guests.

  44. 44.

    blingee

    October 16, 2012 at 12:14 pm

    Regardless of so called “Rules” I expect a disprportionate amount of ‘gotcha’ questions for Obama. I expect Crowley to be in instigator of a lot of these by picking old white southern looking people. I expect Crowley to pull a few other stunts as well.

    Rmoney will have some tricks too. I expect he will probably try act like the man to beat rather than the aggressor last time and the Village will say afterwards how Obama was such a meany. Someone on CNN and/or Faux will call Obama an angry black man at which point everyone should put down their shot glasses and inject heroin into their neck.

  45. 45.

    Maude

    October 16, 2012 at 12:40 pm

    Hillary Clinton said her piece in Lima Peru last night. The day before the second debate.
    She is sabotaging. Now Obama has to make the ultimately responsible statement.
    The Republicans will have fun with this.
    If Clinton really thought she was responsible for the security at Benghazi, she would have immediately resigned after the attack.
    Her statement just made it harder for Obama. Thanks, Clinton.

  46. 46.

    Tractarian

    October 16, 2012 at 2:07 pm

    “To the best of the Commission’s abilities, there will be no TV cut-aways to any candidate who is not responding to a question while another candidate is answering a question or to a candidate who is not giving a closing statement while another candidate is doing so.” TV guys, you so broke this rule.

    Unbelievable. Recall that it was the split-screen during the Denver debate that revealed Obama’s sneering, looking down, and generally poor optics for the President.

    There is no doubt that the split-screen was a big reason that Romney was deemed to have dominated that debate.

    And the split-screen was against the rules.

  47. 47.

    JustRuss

    October 16, 2012 at 3:34 pm

    My memory’s not perfect, but I’d swear I read yesterday that Crowley thinks follow-ups are part of her role as moderator. So did she not even read the rules (yes, I expect a lot, I know), or just decide to blow them off?

Comments are closed.

Primary Sidebar

On The Road - lashonharangue - Southern Chile Road Trip - Part 5 3
Image by lashonharangue (12/8/25)

2026 Pets of Balloon Juice Calendar

PLEASE REVIEW YOUR INFO ASAP

Recent Comments

  • HeleninEire on Monday Night Open Thread (Dec 8, 2025 @ 9:26pm)
  • NotMax on Monday Night Open Thread (Dec 8, 2025 @ 9:26pm)
  • piratedan on Monday Night Open Thread (Dec 8, 2025 @ 9:26pm)
  • Eric S. on Monday Night Open Thread (Dec 8, 2025 @ 9:24pm)
  • RevRick on Open Thread: Another Political Covid Tragedy (Dec 8, 2025 @ 9:23pm)

Balloon Juice Posts

View by Topic
View by Author
View by Month & Year
View by Past Author

Featuring

Medium Cool
Artists in Our Midst
Authors in Our Midst
On Artificial Intelligence (7-part series)

🎈Keep Balloon Juice Ad Free

Become a Balloon Juice Patreon
Donate with Venmo, Zelle or PayPal

Calling All Jackals

Site Feedback
Nominate a Rotating Tag
Submit Photos to On the Road
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Links)
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Posts)
Fix Nyms with Apostrophes

Balloon Juice Mailing List Signup

Social Media

Balloon Juice
WaterGirl
TaMara
John Cole
DougJ (aka NYT Pitchbot)
Betty Cracker
Tom Levenson
David Anderson
Major Major Major Major
DougJ NYT Pitchbot
mistermix
Rose Judson (podcast)

Site Footer

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Comment Policy
  • Our Authors
  • Blogroll
  • Our Artists
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2025 Dev Balloon Juice · All Rights Reserved · Powered by BizBudding Inc

Share this ArticleLike this article? Email it to a friend!

Email sent!