Drip, drip, drip.
Just when you thought blackboard and caliphate conspiracy enthusiast Glenn Beck couldn’t get any weirder, he goes and pisses in a jar, sticks an Obama toy doll in there, and calls it art.
Raving freakazoid nut sandwich (and right wing hater extraordinaire) Glenn Beck has come up with another stunt to try to get his name back in the media, and it’s working, of course: How Can You Buy “Obama in Pee Pee” and Glenn’s Other Works of Art?
It’s supposed to be a lame parody of Andres Serrano’s “Piss Christ” — without the art or the creativity. This is how far the loony right has devolved, and it’s a pretty nasty sight.
I just.
I cannot.
[via Little Green Footballs]
[cross-posted at ABLC]
Anya
If only people Refrained giving this attention whore what he craves the most…
Ash Can
How long before this guy just has a complete psychotic meltdown?
PeakVT
And people say conservatives can’t be funny.
People sure nailed that one.
Cassidy
Considering how much they freak out over Piss Christ, this is kinda funny.
Capt. Seaweed
This is very creative. Good for Glenn! We need more of this =)
? Martin
Mormons are so whacky.
lacp
He may be nuts, but he’s not stupid – apparently he wants $25,000 for this oeuvre (and it’s not even real piss, it’s beer). Still, a very, very strange man.
FormerSwingVoter
What is with the right-wing’s continued fascination with “Piss Christ”? It was 25 years ago, for chrissake.
MaxxLange
They are still on the “Piss Christ” thing? Wasn’t that 20 years ago?
KG
@Anya: but if not him, then who can we point and laugh at?
J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford
@Cassidy:
I think Glenn Beck hopes Democrats/liberals/Obama supporters freak out over this so he can compare thoughtful, reflective Christians upset about the “Piss Christ” sacrilege to the false idol/Obamassiah worshiping Obots. A “how do you like it when we dunk your “God” in urine” eye-for-an-eye.
——————————————————
Neighbor: Roy, can you get sick drinkin’ piss?
Roy: I think you can.
Neighbor: Even if it’s your own?
? Martin
I should add, a quart of pee is impressive. Shame it’s wasted on a guy with a name as short as Glenn Beck. He should be able to get by with no more than half a cup or so.
LanceThruster
Is there anyway to ensure that the urine in question is indeed Beck’s? I’d hate to think that he’d just be employing factories of winos filling jars for him in order to mass produce these delightful artifacts.
When will the wingnut outrage kick in decrying Glenn comparing Obama to Key-ryest?
scav
@lacp: seriously? he’s on record as demonstrating Obama is someone he’d like to have a beer with and what’s he doing with beer anyway? “I need it for my art installation Bishop”? Riiiiighht.
KG
@Ash Can: how long until, or how long since?
Cassidy
@J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford: I figured the same. Clumsy, but amusing.
Schlemizel
@Cassidy:
I am sure he is hoping we will freak out about this in the same way so he can say we are all anti-Xian hypocrites.
Gad I hope the ‘willing to be enraged’ segment of the left leaves this alone.
Let it stand for the mental acuity of its creator
Cassidy
@Schlemizel: And you all called me an optimist.
jibeaux
That man needs a hobby. And a coaster. Ew.
Suffern ACE
@Cassidy: Considering how the Piss Christ controversy was two decades ago, its kind of funny how they never move the fuck on.
They might be surprised to learn that the concern with “gansta” rap might be a bit dated.
Ms. D. Ranged in AZ
Holy f*ckb@lls! I was eating lunch when I saw that pic….there’s pee on the counter under the jar. Ewwwwwww…….That’s the kind of crap a 10 year old boy would come up with, not a grown man.
Schlemizel
@Cassidy:
Its such a clumsy attempt I’d like to think everyone can see it from a mile away. But it would only take one guy in Oxnard to write one letter complaining about it for Beck to have his ‘proof’.
Remember:
Willard M. Romney says it /does not equal GOP beliefs!
Some random nut just in Oxnard says it = all liberals everywhere for all time!
EDIT – quick question: anyone know how to make a not equals sign on this thing?
Cassidy
@Suffern ACE:
Ssssshhhh. They still shoot people for that shit.
Jay in Oregon
One of the surefire tells of a right-wing crank is the delusion that the left sees Obama as some kind of messiah figure.
Any time you hear a “concerned Democrat” or “independent” refer to Obama as “The One” or “Dear Leader”, you know they’re full of shit.
Strandedvandal
Oh if it were actually this weirdo’s biological waste. Some enterprising person could by it, drug test it, and then just think of all the wonderful fun one could have! “We found a large amount of rat feces present, as well as diazapan, estrogen and kit kat bars.”
Brian R.
If it’s really Beck’s piss, we need to buy it and test it to discover just what sorts of hallucinogens he’s on these days.
I’m guessing some form of high-grade LSD, a sampling of shrooms and maybe some sort of horse tranquilizer.
Zifnab
@Cassidy: That’s what makes it so brilliant! If you call Beck a putz for pulling this stunt, he gets to yank all your liberal Arts funding, while simultaneously admitting you think Obama is Jesus! And if you don’t call Beck a putz, you turn into a conservative!
BECK CAN’T LOSE!
JGabriel
Why does Glenn Beck hate America?
.
Schlemizel
Although it occurs to me that we should point out that Beck himself is equating Obama to Christ.
Cassidy
Is it weird that whenever I hear the name Glenn Beck I immediately envision some hallucinogenic hybrid of Pee Wee Herman’s Playhouse, Sprockets, and Capt. Spaulding hawking his fried chicken?
Belafon (formerly anonevent)
@Schlemizel: Nope. Use one of the ones from programming:
C-type languages: !=
Haskell: /=
There are others.
quannlace
If Donald Trump’s kids can hold an intervention of sorts, can’t Beck’s kids do something to put this pathetic loser out of his (and ours) misery?
Ted & Hellen
Are we sure ABL isn’t Glenn Beck’s publicist?
Misterpuff
Obviously it’s
Piss Anti-Christ
Culture of Truth
This a perfect Secret Santa gift.
Southern Beale
Imani, did you hear about the latest Florida redneck gun nut, er I mean “responsible firearms owner,” who shot and killed a 17 year old black kid? Who was unarmed? He says he “felt threatened” because he thought he was in the presence of a gang. Of course he did.
Un fucking believable.
Cassidy
@Southern Beale: Psst. Toawrds the bottom of the page after I heart PCCC post.
JGabriel
__
__
MaxxLange:
Conservatives still wail about apocryphal hippies spitting on returning war vets, which, if it had happened, would be over forty years ago.
Conservatives aren’t just haters, they hold grudges too.
Forever.
.
Steeplejack
Once a shock jock, always a shock jock.
Salon’s deep-background profile of Beck from 2009.
JGabriel
@Misterpuff: Aw dammit, I should have thought of that one. Kudos.
KyCole
My son and I listened to his show a few weeks ago just for shits and giggles. We had no idea what he was even talking about. It may as well have been in Arabic.
Suffern ACE
@JGabriel: Unless they were clearly in the wrong. Then the issue is that things went to far. Like “I was all in favor of the VRA, but then the Black Panthers went too far.” Or “I was opposed to the VRA, because Jim Crow would have died on its own, so it didn’t matter anyway.”
GregB
Wait till Beck sees Serrano’s latest work:
Shit Joseph Smith.
Supernumerary Charioteer
I dunno, I actually like hearing about these sorts of things. I can’t get outraged over them, as pathetic as they are. It’s just a nice ‘ha ha, Franco is still dead’ reminder, and then I can get back to work.
Culture of Truth
Don’t Piss On My President and Tell Me It’s Raining
Steeplejack
@Schlemizel:
Does this work? ≠
ETA: Yes! Got it with
≠
Xecky Gilchrist
@Ted & Hellen: I like pie!
Oh, it’s you, huh, PO?
Bubblegum Tate
@lacp:
What a fuckin’ sellout.
Still, I bet it doesn’t go unpurchased, considering the drooling troglodytes who make up his audience.
Betty Cracker
Unless I’m very much mistaken, the Obama figurine submerged in the faux-pee is draped in an American flag. Isn’t Beck therefore guilty of some sort of banner blaspheme?
Comrade Jake
So he filled it with Coors Light and called it piss? Well, at least he got one thing right.
Carolinus
MoDo pens another bizarre Susan Rice column:
Oh FFS.
Phlip
Like this ≠
Bubblegum Tate
@GregB:
Internets is yours today. Do with it what you will.
priscianusjr
I don’t see where Serrano’s work is any more artistic or creative than Beck’s, but then, Serrano never had his own television show.
Steeplejack
@Phlip:
So I see you’re from the “Don’t teach a man to fish, just give him a fish” school of thought.
Schlemizel
@Belafon (formerly anonevent):
Thanks, I had tried /= and it didn’t come out in the comment so I edited it – wonder what I did wrong. != completely slipped my mind. I never do logic or math of reelz any more 8-{D
Amir Khalid
I don’t get this “work of art”. By analogy with Serrano’s Piss Christ, is Glenn Beck putting Obama on a level with Jesus?
Bulworth
@MaxxLange: As was “welfare reform”. Maybe their Internets don’t work and all they have left are these folders of papers and things.
Phlip
@Steeplejack
I compose most stuff in Word (for spelling reasons) where I just need to go to Insert Symbols Mathematical Operators and pick what you want.
trollhattan
@Comrade Jake:
Touche sir, touche.
Schlemizel
@Steeplejack:
Thats it! Thanks, I know someone would know. Sadly, I will have forgotten this by the next time I want to use id
Southern Beale
@Cassidy:
Thanks I missed it.
freelancer (iPhone)
Becks…Australian for “piss”.
Schlemizel
@Amir Khalid:
Thats how I’d attack this joke
Here is a MORMON! who is equating Obama to Christ!
I’d be beating the hell out of him from that approach as it gets the Christianists who already hate Mormons as cultist up in arms instead of on his side.
And, as has been noted – thats an AMERICAN FLAG in that piss with the President!
Beck hates Christ & America
gitta rope
Cassidy
@Southern Beale: I missed it last night, but the exchange today was interesting.
muddy
@Schlemizel: That was my first thought, and you two beat me to posting it. Equivalence, how does it work?
Steeplejack
@Phlip:
I often do that too, but it doesn’t help someone who’s clunking along in vanilla FYWP comment mode.
SatanicPanic
Real mature Glenn. I pee pee on you hee hee hee
Steeplejack
@Schlemizel:
I keep a little text file with cheat notes for codes I use regularly, and I find that once they’re in there I often remember them and don’t need to refer to the text file. Weird how that works.
Violet
Oh good Lord. This is awful. I know Beck is crazy, but this is just beyond. I wonder how wingnuts feel about Beck pissing on an American flag?
lol
Of course, the interesting thing about Piss Christ is that if you just saw the photo, you likely wouldn’t know.
jl
I’m not commenting on it until some one can verify this did not originate as a spoof in The Onion.
Glenn Beck could be that pathetic, but did he really do it?
muddy
@Steeplejack: I used to do that in college. I would type my notes out that I took in class, so as to better read them for studying purposes, but all it took was typing them out, I never needed to go back to them later. Brains are funny creatures.
Seanly
@JGabriel:
There’s a vet on my street with a new car that has a bumper sticker which reads “Vietnam Vets Are Not Fonda Jane”. That was over 45 years ago. Most people behind him on the roads are probably wondering why “fond of” is misspelled and who is Jane.
And this jerk leaves his RV (and the next door neighbor leaves a flatbed trailer) parked on the street 24-7. I’m kinda not fonda these idiots.
JWR
@Misterpuff: I actually read some of Beck’s commenter’s “thoughts”, and yes, “peeing on the anti-christ” does indeed seem to be the hilarious intent. Nice catch.
Yutsano
@Seanly: Welcome to Idaho. Have you had any funeral potatoes yet?
Cassidy
Someone should bring it ful circle and acution of Glenn Beck dolls in a jar of pee and donate the funds to Planned Parenthood.
Culture of Truth
Delicious too. But I’ve said too much.
Cargo
Glenn Beck just had to get one of the jars of urine he’s been hoarding in his basement for the last four years.
Trooptrap Tripetrope
@Schlemizel: All you need is copypastecharacter.com, possibly the most useful site ever.
dantoujours
@Violet: On WorldNutDaily there is a poll – last time I checked 10% of wingnuts disapprove of putting the US flag in (fake) urine.
http://www.wnd.com/2012/11/glenn-beck-puts-obama-bobblehead-in-urine/
Jay
The big reason this Beck thing ticks me off is that, unlike alot of my fellow Christians, I really dug “Piss Christ.”
Looking at “Piss Christ” with a cool head and years of reading about the philosophy of art under my belt, I came to think of it this way: somewhere, there’s a poor, sick man who’s lost total control of his body. He’s emotionally jolted, lying in dirt and a puddle of his own urine, and he has this cross, covered in the same urine. It’s dirty, but it’s still a cross, and after all that, the man still has it. Or maybe somewhere, there’s an American soldier who’s been left to die in the same situation.
Think about it.
I think Beck knows about the controversy “Piss Christ” caused, but he’s way too dumb to look at the picture critically. What’s he’s doing in this instance is saying, “OK, Obama voters, you mock ‘our’ God (as though all of us think the same way about ‘Piss Christ’ or even know what it is), we’ll mock ‘your’ president.”
Some of these wingnuts want a civil war, yes. That’s just the Neo-Confederates, though. Beck & his cronies want a holy war.
Time to call the Beckites the new jihadists.
Suffern ACE
@Carolinus: She’s still really pissed that the Dems blocked Bolton for that SoS job, isn’t she? And then the voters had the nerve to block Bolton for that job again by not electing Romney. That’s the thing about MoDo. She knows a man when she sees one and Susan Rice just isn’t that.
muddy
McCain and crew probably don’t want Susan RIce to be Secretary of State, because then *their* black woman named Rice won’t count as proof of their non-racism anymore.
Ted & Hellen
@Xecky Gilchrist:
It’s important for you to share that with us, isn’t it?
Why do you think that is?
The Red Pen
How much for just a jar of Glenn Beck’s pee?
I’m asking for a friend.
ruemara
You know, if he put some serious effort into it, it could serve as a decent ripoff of Serrano and neoconservative rebuttal to high art. But that would take more than the “der, huh, I put Obummer inna mah peee, huh” which appeals to the frat-minded brutes.
chopper
@lacp:
maybe it’s both. for example, keystone lite.
chopper
i’d say this calls for a jar of piss with a figurine of Reagan in it, but that would be a waste of good piss.
Enhanced Mooching Techniques
@Ash Can:
He’s had one already. One of my friends went to high school with him. Beck is a bigger druggie than Limbaugh.
Aet
It’s probably the pee of thankless interns.
Is there _nothing_ these people won’t steal?
Publius39
@Ted & Hellen: Because it’s demonstrably clear that you are an asshole, and don’t do anything constructive except be a deceiving, lying, asshole.
Cmm
@Suffern ACE:
I will see you Piss Christ and raise you Madelyn Murray O’Hare. The school prayer case was in the 1960s and they still act like that just happened too. I remember her name being raised in my Catholic grade school as a bad person (an ATHEIST) who had made it so our schools don’t get any funding from the state like the publics do. This was in the early 70s and I have no idea how true it was. And her name still comes up in wing nut circles today, as if she hasn’t been dead for years and years.
Rich (In Name Only) in Reno
I think somebody should buy it just so they can turn it over to a reputable lab, say the one Florida wanted to use on welfare applicants, and have it analyzed for whatever dope that crazy boy be taking.
D. Mason
I view Glenn Beck through the same lens as Howard Stern. Within that paradigm this is completely unsurprising. Beck is a remarkably high priced whore and nothing else.
danielx
Every time you think you’ve seen the ultimate in wingnut craziness…..
Judas Escargot, Bringer of Loaves and Fish Sandwiches
@lacp:
And given Beck’s religion, probably 3.2% beer at that…
1badbaba3
Glenn Beck seems to have a deep-seated hatred of Obama. Who knew? This is dead brilliant. It’s not a tell at all. I am convinced of Glenn’s obvious superiority, and look forward to his tough, but fair style of leadership. From the looks of this, it is inevitable, innit?
Beck/Jar of room temperature fake piss ’16! ! ! ‘Cos it’s never too early, before it’s too late.
Get on the bandwagon today!
Fred
But it has always been the problem of “The Job Creators” that they lack creative originality. That’s why they alway have to put up with the dirty hippies, ’cause they are the ones with all the ideas.
Righties are just reactionaries who feel it is their god given right to lift anything they like saying “There, I can do it too and besides I thought of it first. So there.”
Hint to would be wing-nut artists: The secret is smoking pot. Two hits and you’ll have more original ideas than you know what to do with. Down with gubmint regulation!
gnomedad
@Amir Khalid:
I calmly await “Libruls are ANGRY because they think Obummer is the Messiah!!!”
Joel
@priscianusjr: Serrano was first, so he has creativity won in a landslide. As for artistic, not my forte, so I’ll leave it to others.
Lavocat
Glenn Beck: forever plumbing the depths of bugfuckery.
Mike G
@Cassidy:
Being solipsistic self-centered assholes who think everyone is as devoid of empathy as they are, Beck and his army of droolers think libruls will freak with outrage the way the Religious Wrong did over Piss Christ. Then they can smirk having “proven” that Political Correctness Is Fascism because shutupshutupshutup
Chris Grrr™
@chopper: Best comment on the topic here or anywhere.
Jay in Oregon
@Jay:
I don’t remember if this was the intent of the original author, but I remember reading once that “Piss Christ” was a statement on how fundamentalists have degraded the name and image of the Jesus they claim to revere.
rikyrah
crazy ass mofo.
BruceFromOhio
The Invisible Hand demands the rational self-interest of the market – in action!
ETA: If I piss in a jar and throw Glenn Beck in there, would you buy it? OK, then would you buy it on a payment plan of three EZ-Pay charges deducted from your checking account? Call now, operators are standing buy!
Thurston J. Bowell III
I’m currently working on an 0bama sculpture,..but I need more ruffage to finish it.