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Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Let there be snark.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

Do we throw up our hands or do we roll up our sleeves? (hint, door #2)

Sometimes the world just tells you your cat is here.

Their boy Ron is an empty plastic cup that will never know pudding.

Republicans choose power over democracy, every day.

I’d hate to be the candidate who lost to this guy.

Donald Trump found guilty as fuck – May 30, 2024!

Wake up. Grow up. Get in the fight.

Dear Washington Post, you are the darkness now.

An almost top 10,000 blog!

If you can’t control your emotions, someone else will.

I have other things to bitch about but those will have to wait.

The desire to stay informed is directly at odds with the need to not be constantly enraged.

Beware of advice from anyone for whom Democrats are “they” and not “we.”

The gop is a fucking disgrace.

75% of people clapping liked the show!

When I was faster i was always behind.

Dear elected officials: Trump is temporary, dishonor is forever.

Bark louder, little dog.

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

You are either for trump or for democracy. Pick one.

Dumb motherfuckers cannot understand a consequence that most 4 year olds have fully sorted out.

“Can i answer the question? No you can not!”

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You are here: Home / Music / This post will be free of snark

This post will be free of snark

by Sarah, Proud and Tall|  December 2, 20121:19 am| 115 Comments

This post is in: Music

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Yay! Sparklies!

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Previous Post: « Saturday Night Dance Open Thread
Next Post: Early Morning Open Thread: Refugee »

Reader Interactions

115Comments

  1. 1.

    Jewish Steel

    December 2, 2012 at 1:26 am

    Fuck the snark. Free the snark.

    The snark is turning into a difficult gf.

  2. 2.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    December 2, 2012 at 1:27 am

    STOMP.

  3. 3.

    redshirt

    December 2, 2012 at 1:29 am

    Live Snark or Die

  4. 4.

    JordanRules

    December 2, 2012 at 1:32 am

    Get Snark or Die Tryin

  5. 5.

    srv

    December 2, 2012 at 1:33 am

    Well Sarah, there wasn’t anything homoerotic in that.

  6. 6.

    Sarah, Proud and Tall

    December 2, 2012 at 1:38 am

    @srv:

    No snark now.

    Mmmm. White boy in footie pajamas.

  7. 7.

    Alison

    December 2, 2012 at 1:40 am

    @Sarah, Proud and Tall:

    White boy in footie pajamas.

    Subtitle: The Life and Times of Post-2012 Mitt Romney

  8. 8.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 1:42 am

    @Sarah, Proud and Tall:

    White boy in footie pajamas.

    I am a bit upset with my brother’s family. He wanted to buy me Grinch footie PJs as part of my X-mas present; the rest of them all thought it was silly. But that was the fucking point – Grinch covered footie PJs for adults? Awesome.

  9. 9.

    Felonius Monk

    December 2, 2012 at 1:44 am

    Right-wing chicken fucker, animal cruelty advocate and former ditch-digger Steve King (rethug – Iowa) apparently isn’t buying in to the republican’s Hispanic outreach:

    Democrats will find a way to hand deliver citizenship papers along with a great big check from money borrowed from the Chinese.

    Interview with an Asshole

  10. 10.

    Sarah, Proud and Tall

    December 2, 2012 at 1:45 am

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Bastards.

    ETA: Your brother is cool.

  11. 11.

    Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)

    December 2, 2012 at 1:45 am

    The inability of the front pagers not to step on each other is becoming a serious problem around here. One late night open thread is plenty. If you feel the need to share videos, put links in a comment.

  12. 12.

    Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN)

    December 2, 2012 at 1:47 am

    @Omnes Omnibus: Gophers 4, Badgers 1. I didn’t think you guys played that badly.

  13. 13.

    CW in LA

    December 2, 2012 at 1:48 am

    How can you be debating snark or in any way enjoying yourselves when history’s greatest monster, Barack Obama, is still in command of history’s most dreadful and eeeeeeeeeeevil weapon: Drones! Drooooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnessssss!

    (Sorry, Spatula & Hellen got ahold of my account there for a sec.)

  14. 14.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 1:49 am

    @Sarah, Proud and Tall: I agree. He did tell me where to find them. I may buy them for myself – just to have them. I don’t even like socks; I am not sure how footie PJs would work for me. But owning them seems worthwhile.

  15. 15.

    Amir Khalid

    December 2, 2012 at 1:51 am

    @Omnes Omnibus:
    Per the time-honoured Balloon Juice tradition: “Pictures, or it didn’t happen!”

  16. 16.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 1:53 am

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN): I spent my evening watching the Wisconsin-Nebraska game. over 500 yards of rushing offense. Okay, I switched back and forth between that and “Elf.” So sue me.

  17. 17.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 1:57 am

    @Amir Khalid: Happy now? Not footies, but the best I could find at short notice.

  18. 18.

    redshirt

    December 2, 2012 at 1:59 am

    The urban myth I’ve heard about adult sized footies is they grow hot and therefore stinky and gross, quickly. Confirm/deny.

  19. 19.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 2:00 am

    @redshirt: Don’t own and probably won’t wear. Just want, because OMG.

  20. 20.

    Amir Khalid

    December 2, 2012 at 2:04 am

    @Omnes Omnibus:
    404 error. Please to fix?

  21. 21.

    Bunker

    December 2, 2012 at 2:05 am

    @CW in LA:
    Stooge.

  22. 22.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 2:07 am

    @Amir Khalid: Works for me. Here is another try just in case.

  23. 23.

    Bago

    December 2, 2012 at 2:09 am

    Got to geek out a bit in Seattle tonight. The table had knives, 20’s, and bar food under it when we left. Just sayin.

  24. 24.

    Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn

    December 2, 2012 at 2:19 am

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN):

    The inability of the front pagers not to step on each other is becoming a serious severely conservative problem around here.

    FTFY, and, yes, I totes couldn’t agree more! I mean, my God, man, with one front-page post coming right after another, I never know which one to post in! Where will all my pithy wisdom receive the most eyeballs? What if I comment in the wrong thread, the thread where it turns out the losers are, and the folks in the cool-kids thread never read my insightful missives? Or, what if I post a comment in the cool-kids’ thread, but then moments later another front-pager posts something the cook kids like even better, and so my post in the first cool-kids’ thread becomes the last post, sight unseen?

    OH MY SKETTERS, WE MUST ALERT COLE AS SOON AS ASAP!! TUNCH HIMSELF COULD BE IN DANGER*!!

    *Of missing out on a belly rub or two.

  25. 25.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    December 2, 2012 at 2:19 am

    We need another open thread. This one has only been here for an hour.

  26. 26.

    redshirt

    December 2, 2012 at 2:21 am

    @Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn: Ermagherd!

  27. 27.

    Amir Khalid

    December 2, 2012 at 2:23 am

    @Omnes Omnibus:
    Odd. Still no joy.

  28. 28.

    Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn

    December 2, 2012 at 2:26 am

    @redshirt:

    Yes, won’t someone think of her?

    [Edited for perfunctory FYWPWARCS.]

  29. 29.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    December 2, 2012 at 2:27 am

    @Amir Khalid:

    He’s a mean one.

  30. 30.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 2:28 am

    @Amir Khalid: Mebbe Shopko websites don’t work overseas. Try this – it’s lady PJs, but still.

  31. 31.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    December 2, 2012 at 2:30 am

    @Amir Khalid: That last one worked for me, at least.

  32. 32.

    eemom

    December 2, 2012 at 2:31 am

    We can haz another Saturday night antique p-oRn post that will drive all teh pearl clutchers shrieking to teh fainting couches, plz, Mrs. Sarah?

    I mean it’s the LEAST y’all could do after two beers Bernie puked on the rug downstairs. kthxbai.

  33. 33.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 2:32 am

    @Omnes Omnibus: Oh fuck this. Moderation? I try to respond to a comment and I get moderated? FYWP.

  34. 34.

    redshirt

    December 2, 2012 at 2:34 am

    @Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn: Hillary Level Purple Pantsuit

  35. 35.

    YellowJournalism

    December 2, 2012 at 2:37 am

    @JordanRules: Movie titles? Not Without My Snark

  36. 36.

    Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn

    December 2, 2012 at 2:38 am

    @redshirt: Hey — Respect the pantsuit.

    That pantsuit’s got more shit done in four years then Ms. Boots d’Oil Tanker could ever dream of.

  37. 37.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    December 2, 2012 at 2:39 am

    @YellowJournalism: A twitter hashtag on the blog?

    Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Snark

  38. 38.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    December 2, 2012 at 2:39 am

    @YellowJournalism:

    A Snark Grows In Brooklyn

  39. 39.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    December 2, 2012 at 2:40 am

    Snarks On a Plane

  40. 40.

    Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn

    December 2, 2012 at 2:41 am

    “My god, it’s full of snark!”

  41. 41.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    December 2, 2012 at 2:41 am

    Army of Snarkness

  42. 42.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    December 2, 2012 at 2:43 am

    The Umbrellas of Snarkbourg

  43. 43.

    James E. Powell

    December 2, 2012 at 2:44 am

    This thread has jumped the snark.

  44. 44.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 2:46 am

    @James E. Powell: You should be beaten with a very large tuna.

  45. 45.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    December 2, 2012 at 2:48 am

    @Omnes Omnibus: and now, the Fish Slapping Dance.

  46. 46.

    JordanRules

    December 2, 2012 at 2:48 am

    Enemy of the Snark

    I heard the bestest funniest First World Problem about an hour ago…I forget where. Teeheehee

  47. 47.

    redshirt

    December 2, 2012 at 2:52 am

    Snarkelot

  48. 48.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 2:54 am

    @The prophet Nostradumbass: Thank you. I love that. I really do love that.

  49. 49.

    YellowJournalism

    December 2, 2012 at 2:55 am

    Just in time for the holidays: How the Snark Stole Christmas

  50. 50.

    JordanRules

    December 2, 2012 at 2:57 am

    Okay wait, I was being umm snarky (damn near right after being admonished for it too; a rebel, yes) but this stomp is hella blatant. Dayum! LOL Reference the previous thread and post vids too. Def coulda been a comment on previous OT.

    Mostly I think its all good because everyone knows its not intentional or that serious. Another sign of coolness inherent in this place IMO.

    So cheers to 2 posts then!! I love them all!!

  51. 51.

    YellowJournalism

    December 2, 2012 at 3:01 am

    @JordanRules: That post is proof we are all on drugs here. Cheers!

  52. 52.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 3:04 am

    @YellowJournalism:

    That post is proof we are all on drugs here.

    No, it doesn’t. It just creates a rebuttable presumption that we are all on drugs.

  53. 53.

    James E. Powell

    December 2, 2012 at 3:04 am

    Bring me the snark of Alfredo Garcia

  54. 54.

    eemom

    December 2, 2012 at 3:06 am

    The snark is coming from within the thread. Get out of the thread.

  55. 55.

    JordanRules

    December 2, 2012 at 3:06 am

    @YellowJournalism: I can only speak for absolutely everyone here and cocur!

    Our snark runneth over!

  56. 56.

    MikeJ

    December 2, 2012 at 3:08 am

    les quatre cents snark

    Home from meetup. Eating pancakes and drinking bourbon.

  57. 57.

    srv

    December 2, 2012 at 3:08 am

    This snark goes to 11

  58. 58.

    JordanRules

    December 2, 2012 at 3:09 am

    @eemom: Fuck!! I don’t want to run. How does one stay and fight it?

  59. 59.

    redshirt

    December 2, 2012 at 3:09 am

    We’ll snark them over there before they can snark us over here.

  60. 60.

    Jewish Steel

    December 2, 2012 at 3:09 am

    Sunday In The Snark With George

    @MikeJ: Reports are trickling in. That sounded like a right old knees-up in the Emerald City.

  61. 61.

    YellowJournalism

    December 2, 2012 at 3:10 am

    @JordanRules: I snark you, man. I snark you all!

    Oh yeah, and: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Snark

  62. 62.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 3:10 am

    @Jewish Steel: Barefoot in the Snark?

  63. 63.

    JordanRules

    December 2, 2012 at 3:11 am

    Mmmmm bourbon pancakes

  64. 64.

    Alison

    December 2, 2012 at 3:12 am

    Uh oh, it’s late, I’m semi-bored, and someone’s decided to play hashtag games on BJ.

    Twilight: Breaking Snark

  65. 65.

    Yutsano

    December 2, 2012 at 3:13 am

    @MikeJ: Got an eggnog latte to cap off the night. It was pretty damn fun I must say. And the official announcement: next meet-up will be Inauguration night. Right now the discussion is to invade the Cougar Room at Vito’s but we’ll see how things shake out as the date gets closer.

  66. 66.

    JordanRules

    December 2, 2012 at 3:13 am

    Pssss…I snark dead people

  67. 67.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    December 2, 2012 at 3:14 am

    A Hard Day’s Snark

  68. 68.

    redshirt

    December 2, 2012 at 3:14 am

    Snark = Smurf

  69. 69.

    Yutsano

    December 2, 2012 at 3:15 am

    HALP!! I r modererated!!

  70. 70.

    MikeJ

    December 2, 2012 at 3:15 am

    Lock, stock, and two smoking snarks.

  71. 71.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    December 2, 2012 at 3:15 am

    The Wages of Snark

  72. 72.

    Alison

    December 2, 2012 at 3:16 am

    Close Encounters of the Snarky Kind

  73. 73.

    redshirt

    December 2, 2012 at 3:18 am

    Snarkapocalypse

  74. 74.

    YellowJournalism

    December 2, 2012 at 3:18 am

    Mr. Magorium’s Snark Emporium

    @Alison: Beats arguing with trolls. Also takes the edge off the insomnia.

  75. 75.

    Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn

    December 2, 2012 at 3:18 am

    “Do not try to end the snark. That is impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth: There is no snark.”

    (Damn I love that flick.)

  76. 76.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 3:19 am

    @redshirt: Come on:
    Snarkapocalypse Now. Do it right.

  77. 77.

    Yutsano

    December 2, 2012 at 3:20 am

    Snark Hard: With a Vengeance.

  78. 78.

    Suffern ACE

    December 2, 2012 at 3:22 am

    I say this in all earnestness. I have been to to see the guru on mountaintop and he told me many secrets for obtaining wealth, health and sexual prowess. I promised not to reveal them. But I can say that becoming one with the flow of snark was a key component of all those who follow the Way.

  79. 79.

    redshirt

    December 2, 2012 at 3:22 am

    @Omnes Omnibus: No, I meant to warn of the coming SNARKAPOCALYPSE! A quantum singularity of snark threatens all of reality. Can mankind grow more sincere in time to save the Universe?

  80. 80.

    Alison

    December 2, 2012 at 3:22 am

    @YellowJournalism: Agreed.

    It’s not personal, Sonny. It’s strictly snark.

  81. 81.

    JordanRules

    December 2, 2012 at 3:23 am

    As god is my witness I will never go snarky again!!

  82. 82.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 3:23 am

    @redshirt: No.

  83. 83.

    Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn

    December 2, 2012 at 3:24 am

    “Forget it, Jake. It’s snark.”

  84. 84.

    YellowJournalism

    December 2, 2012 at 3:24 am

    @Alison: New game?

    “We have nothing to snark but snark itself.”

    Or are we only doing movie quotes?

    “Momma always said like is like a box of snark. You never know what you’re gonna get.”

  85. 85.

    Omnes Omnibus

    December 2, 2012 at 3:24 am

    @JordanRules: Bullshit. No offense.

  86. 86.

    MikeJ

    December 2, 2012 at 3:27 am

    What are they gonna say about him? That he was a kind man? That he was a wise man? That he had plans, man? That he had snark? Bullshit, man!

  87. 87.

    JordanRules

    December 2, 2012 at 3:28 am

    @Omnes Omnibus: No, no, no, you’re right. I will likely be snarky again soon, but damnet nobody snarks dead people like yours truly!

  88. 88.

    srv

    December 2, 2012 at 3:28 am

    A Snark Is Born

  89. 89.

    Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn

    December 2, 2012 at 3:30 am

    The Dude snarks.

  90. 90.

    Alison

    December 2, 2012 at 3:30 am

    @YellowJournalism: Some people were doing titles, some quotes. I say, whatever strikes your fancy.

    If you build it, he will snark.

  91. 91.

    Yutsano

    December 2, 2012 at 3:30 am

    Look fool, I ain’t falling for no snark in my tailpipe!

  92. 92.

    eemom

    December 2, 2012 at 3:31 am

    @YellowJournalism:

    Snark is as snark does. Sir.

  93. 93.

    MikeJ

    December 2, 2012 at 3:32 am

    I’m shocked, shocked to find that snarking is going on in here!

  94. 94.

    YellowJournalism

    December 2, 2012 at 3:33 am

    Wait! We can’t stop here. This is snark country!

  95. 95.

    eemom

    December 2, 2012 at 3:34 am

    The snark……the snark.

  96. 96.

    redshirt

    December 2, 2012 at 3:36 am

    Let go, Luke. Use The Snark.

  97. 97.

    Alison

    December 2, 2012 at 3:38 am

    Confessions of a Snarkoholic

    aka Every Balloon Juice comment thread :)

  98. 98.

    JordanRules

    December 2, 2012 at 3:42 am

    We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Snarkiness

  99. 99.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    December 2, 2012 at 3:43 am

    Captain Renault: What in heaven’s name brought you to Casablanca?
    Rick: My health. I came to Casablanca for the snark.
    Captain Renault: The snark? What snark? We’re in the snarkless desert.
    Rick: I was misinformed.

  100. 100.

    YellowJournalism

    December 2, 2012 at 3:51 am

    Gotta head to bed and try to sleep, but I leave you with this:

    “Where ya headed, cowboy?”
    “Nowhere special.”
    “Nowhere special. I always wanted to snark there.”
    “Snark on.”

  101. 101.

    SiubhanDuinne

    December 2, 2012 at 3:53 am

    This thread is an agony in eight fits.

  102. 102.

    Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn

    December 2, 2012 at 4:03 am

    “I say we take off and snark about the entire site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.”

  103. 103.

    Suffern ACE

    December 2, 2012 at 4:10 am

    Brainy, if you don’t snark Clumsy Snark’s snark, I’m going to tell Papa Snark.

  104. 104.

    Yutsano

    December 2, 2012 at 4:28 am

    Snark on Wayne!

    Snark on Garth!

    :: air guitar ::

  105. 105.

    NotMax

    December 2, 2012 at 5:03 am

    Donnie Snarko

  106. 106.

    gene108

    December 2, 2012 at 5:03 am

    All we are is snark in the wind.

  107. 107.

    Ash Can

    December 2, 2012 at 5:25 am

    The Good, the Bad, and the Snarky

  108. 108.

    R-Jud

    December 2, 2012 at 5:25 am

    My God, it’s full of snark!
    @Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn: Balls. You got there first.

  109. 109.

    Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn)

    December 2, 2012 at 6:23 am

    @R-Jud: E’er so sorry! It’s one of the very few times where it wasn’t me left with l’espirit de l’esceliar.

  110. 110.

    Susan K of the tech support

    December 2, 2012 at 6:49 am

    Bridge Over The River Snark

  111. 111.

    Susan K of the tech support

    December 2, 2012 at 6:51 am

    the Snarky Horror Picture Show.

    (Snarksexual snarksylvania)

  112. 112.

    Bobby Thomson

    December 2, 2012 at 8:15 am

    Faster pussy cat! Snark! Snark!

  113. 113.

    Schlemizel

    December 2, 2012 at 10:07 am

    @Tissue Thin Pseudonym (JMN):

    Was at the game – the Badgers played very hard, not as well as the championship game last spring but better than any team the Gophers have played this year. They gave it everything, it just was not good enough.

    Whats scary about this Gopher team is that they have not been really challenged this year & have played a couple of top 10 teams along with teams for whom beating the Gopher is their reason for breathing. Plus they are a young team yet.

    The numbers are stunning: they are 17-0, they were behind in one game . . . for 9 seconds. They have the two leading scorers in the nation on the team & have outscored opponents 102-11, although their penalty kill is only 2nd best in the nation they have 7 short-handed goals, they lead the nation in shutouts & their goal leads the nation in save percentage.

    We will be there for the second game against Wisc. this afternoon. It will be very interesting to see how the Badgers react – they took going down 2-0 in the second period yesterday badly & it cost them the third goal. To their credit they picked it up particularly in the 3rd.

  114. 114.

    gbear

    December 2, 2012 at 11:20 am

    I’ve been hearing that One Love song on a local public radio rock station. The first time I heard it I was driving home from work and I almost started crying in the car. I own the CD now but hadn’t seen the video. I am now crying for real. What a well done video.

  115. 115.

    marv

    December 2, 2012 at 11:57 am

    O Lucky Snark! I used to listen to that album featured for an instant in Same Love a lot some 40 years ago. Only other time I ever saw it referenced was in Lily Tomlin-Art Carney flick The Late Show. So thanks for that Sarah and also the strong smell of ether throughout post from some time ago.

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