Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Jesus, Mary, & Joseph how is that election even close?

We are builders in a constant struggle with destroyers. keep building.

Yeah, with this crowd one never knows.

Let’s show the world that autocracy can be defeated.

Fuck these fucking interesting times.

Dear media: perhaps we ought to let Donald Trump speak for himself!

After dobbs, women are no longer free.

Not all heroes wear capes.

Prediction: the gop will rethink its strategy of boycotting future committees.

You’re just a puppy masquerading as an old coot.

Every reporter and pundit should have to declare if they ever vacationed with a billionaire.

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

Authoritarian republicans are opposed to freedom for the rest of us.

You cannot love your country only when you win.

Republicans are radicals, not conservatives.

Jack Smith: “Why did you start campaigning in the middle of my investigation?!”

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

Only Democrats have agency, apparently.

When you’re in more danger from the IDF than from Russian shelling, that’s really bad.

Speaker Mike Johnson is a vile traitor to the House and the Constitution.

Republican also-rans: four mules fighting over a turnip.

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

Sitting here in limbo waiting for the dice to roll

Republicans seem to think life begins at the candlelight dinner the night before.

You are here: Home / Civil Rights / Racial Justice / Kiss My Black Ass / The KKK is Having a Membership Drive. You Should Join.

The KKK is Having a Membership Drive. You Should Join.

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KKK Rally signApparently the KKK is trying to increase their membership, and they’re using Obama’s second term to do it. At first it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense since the very fact of Obama’s presidency means we’re living in a post-racial society, so we don’t need the KKK.

Then again, it’s fairly apparent that Obama plans to enslave whitey in his second term, so you better rise up against your Negro oppressors before I pick one of you to be my butler.

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Reader Interactions

123Comments

  3. 3.

    Hunter Gathers

    I call dibs on being your butler. I’m already a butler for a 2 year old and I imagine you’ll punch me in the junk less often than he does.

  8. 8.

    Mr. GOH!

    I’ll do you one better; I’ll be your majordomo or seneschal. Of course, as your chattel property, you’d be liable for my law school loans. I figure I’d come out ahead in the arrangement

  9. 9.

    max

    At first it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense since the very fact of Obama’s presidency means we’re living in a post-racial society

    That just means they’re a downtrodden liberation movement. They’re just seeking the FREEEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM to treat white people better than others*.

    max
    [‘I’m surprised no one has used the phrase ‘Redeemers’.’]

    * In practice, that means treating black people badly. Luckily, they’ve already gotten a head start on that.

  10. 10.

    ruemara

    Can I get my pick of the white slaves? I’d like Elijah Woods, in hot pants. For, um, light spankinghouse cleaning. And maybe laundry.

  11. 11.

    Xenos

    It is damned cold up here on the 50th latitude. As long as you stay in LA I would definitely be up for butlering.

    But do I have to take a silly name?

  13. 13.

    Chris

    Apparently the KKK is trying to increase their membership, and they’re using Obama’s second term to do it.

    But, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, the Ku Klux Klan was founded by Democrats and therefore it is liberal and left-wing. How can this be? You’re not saying the other side of the aisle, ah… LIED to me or anything, are you?

  14. 14.

    Another Halocene Human

    I’m not sure I’m up for this race war thing… maybe I can catch a train to Canada? Rotten turn, after voting for the bloke, and all.

    How could the sheetheads be doing a membership drive? They’re the biggest joke on and off the internet? I mean, if you’re down to two members and less teeth, getting one recruit is a 50% increase in ranks.

    The real creepy racist groups don’t advertise as such.

  19. 19.

    Tone in DC

    @pacem appellant:

    Can I wear a tux with tails, or is that too uppity?

    Moar LULz.

    I don’t need a butler… I need to stay the hell out of Richmond. I spent freshman year there (a long time ago). The war of northern aggression seems like a recent thing, down on Broad Street.

  20. 20.

    FlyingToaster

    I can’t be a butler at the moment, being the stay-at-home mom for WarriorGirl who is sick at home today. She’s the one playing Gingerbread Baby and demanding that I play Foxy.

    You know, even the idiot in Belmont who taped “ROMNEY” in 6 ft white letters on their Mill St fence isn’t mourning Romney any more. What is wrong with these people?

  22. 22.

    karl

    Why not join? The Klan has just a few thousand members — we could easily outnumber them, outvote the “old blood” and create a new partner in the progressive coalition.

    On second thought, nah.

  25. 25.

    AxelFoley

    @J:

    ABL, you knew that a good part of the BJ readership would jump at the chance to be your butler!

    Hell, I’d be her butler (or anything else she wants me to be) and I’m not a potential white slave.

  26. 26.

    red dog

    Concord VA is right between Appomattox and Lynchberg. This may be the very heart of 27% country. I think ABL should put on her armor and ride to the lair. Maybe the lead time is to get those cars off of the front lawn and running.

  29. 29.

    scav

    @Tone in DC: poor dear must be click and text impaired and thus relies upon easily available pictures for comprehension of the whole. GSD knows what he makes of Tom’s posts.

  30. 30.

    Villago Delenda Est

    I don’t want to be a butler. I’d rather just be a footman. What’s the livery going to look like?

    Oh, and do the footmen get to massage the mistress’ feet? If so, I DEFINITELY want to be a footman.

  34. 34.

    Villago Delenda Est

    Seriously, though, when I and an Army buddy were travelling across the South in the early autumn of 1979, from Fort Gordon GA to Fort Sill OK, we ran across a guy in full Klan regalia standing on side of the road at an intersection somewhere in Northern (yes, I know that sounds weird) Alabama handing out leaflets.

    A few of them will always be with us. “Post-racial America” must seem that way if you never venture outside the Beltway, Manhattan, or LA.

  36. 36.

    Comrade Dread

    Then again, it’s fairly apparent that Obama plans to enslave whitey in his second term, so you better rise up against your Negro oppressors before I pick one of you to be my butler.

    You’d have to get in line. Capital One and Citigroup have first dibs on me.

  38. 38.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @Amir Khalid:

    The ones with good teeth can be had for as low as 1500 quatloos.

    Comely wenches of course are in higher demand, especially the blondes.

  40. 40.

    Forum Transmitted Disease

    The real creepy racist groups don’t advertise as such.

    @Another Halocene Human: But they would like very much to. I spend far too much time at their sites. They are convinced that the overwhelming majority of whites bitterly hate and resent being under the thumb of the Kenyan usurper, and that all us white folks will rebel and have a fine Day Of The Rope if only they can get their message past the gatekeepers of the Liberal/Jew (depends on which bunch of WP folks you’re talking to, and this is the cause of a huge schism in The Cause at the moment) Media.

    This is an interesting and not unforeseen development. The Klan resurgence in the 1920s was largely an attempt to take white supremacy mainstream, and they did pretty well for a while until the usual suspects started lynching at will and the damned liberal media had the nerve to photograph and distribute the results. They’re hoping, like all people without imagination do, that they can repeat the actions of a century ago and that it will work in a society that’s 100 years older, smarter, and more different from the world of the 1920s than downtown New York is from a village in Afghanistan.

  41. 41.

    Roger Moore

    @pacem appellant:

    Would it be terribly uncouth if I had to ask what “Moar LULz” means?

    Yes, it would be uncouth, but I’ll answer anyway. “Moar” is a humorous misspelling of “more” and “LULz” is a misspelling of “LOLs” or “Laugh Out Louds”, i.e. jokes or funnies. So “Moar LULz” means more jokes or funnies. If you really want to keep up, you need to read the glossary.

  42. 42.

    Luna Sea

    I misread butler as butter. Changed the conversation entirely. Need my other reading glasses….

  45. 45.

    Patricia Kayden

    Perhaps watching Django Unchained has set them on edge.

    They’re just a state over. My Black behind should try to join.

  46. 46.

    danah gaz

    Everybody should join, thus making it moot. As a bonus, the more “degenerate” you are in the eyes of your local grand wizard, the better.

    It sounds like such a great idea, except that I don’t have the stomach for it, and neither, I suspect, do most people.

  48. 48.

    Quaker in a Basement

    KKK Flyer: “Since Obama’s first term our numbers have doubled”

    It was just me, but now I made a little outfit for the cat.

  49. 49.

    Quaker in a Basement

    Everybody should join, thus making it moot.

    And change the name to the Kool Kracka’ Klub?

  52. 52.

    Forum Transmitted Disease

    In my country we do not have this “White Sale” tradition in the shops. So, how much does a white person go for at these sales?

    @Amir Khalid: Not much. Whites whine a lot, tend towards obesity, have few useful skills that don’t involve shopping, and finding one these days who knows how to do manual labor is damn near impossible.

  53. 53.

    joel hanes

    @PaulW:

    White Americans Guys [are] lousy at housework

    Speak for yourself. I do tile & linoleum floors on hands and knees, my counters are spotless and damned near sterile, I wash every last dish every morning, and I’m a pretty good cook (though I get the opportunity far less often than Cole)

    Hate folding laundry, though …

  55. 55.

    trollhattan

    Me no is potential butler (lacking a Cole-like obsessive housecleaning tendency) but I’d like to apply for chauffeur. We can work up a screenplay for “Driving Miss Imani” and this way, you can bring along mister Scruffy or whatever your cute li’l dog’s name is. I can also make the road trip sammiches.

    My only stipulation: no hoopty.

  56. 56.

    Roger Moore

    @ruemara:

    I do hope we are not randomly assigned slaves. I don’t want my rather doughy neighbors

    The best part about slaves is that there’s a market, so you can sell the ones you’re assigned if you’re dissatisfied. Besides, they may not be so doughy after they’ve spent a few months working in the fields on short rations.

  58. 58.

    Chris

    @Forum Transmitted Disease:

    The Klan resurgence in the 1920s was largely an attempt to take white supremacy mainstream, and they did pretty well for a while until the usual suspects started lynching at will and the damned liberal media had the nerve to photograph and distribute the results.

    Why is it that they didn’t do better in the 1930s out of the Great Depression (like the Nazis did)? It’s not for lack of trying, Gerald L. K. Smith and Charles Coughlin did everything they could to mainstream the “economy was crashed by Jews, make war on them!” idea.

    Was it because the New Dealers made enough concessions to white power that not enough people felt like “their” country was being “taken” from them? Was the economy desperate enough that people rewarded liberals for making it better? Were the KKK types’ ties to traditional elites tainting them by association?

  59. 59.

    Roger Moore

    @trollhattan:

    Me no is potential butler (lacking a Cole-like obsessive housecleaning tendency)

    I hope you realize that the original role of the butler was to look after his master’s bottles (i.e. booze); this was considered the highest class job and so the butler was put in charge of the rest of the crew. I’d be perfectly happy being the booze master of somebody’s household, especially if the alternative was to work in the fields.

  60. 60.

    low-tech cyclist

    I wonder just how many members the KKK has right now, what its organizational structure and bylaws look like, and whether a bunch of libruls could join and simply take it over.

  61. 61.

    Ash Can

    @And Another Thing…:

    click bait

    You must have missed the time when Cole not-so-patiently explained to everyone here that he instructed ABL to cross-post summaries/teasers here from her own blog posts with the exact purpose of making us click through, in a case of one blogger (him) giving a boost to another blogger (her) by directing traffic to her blog. So don’t bitch at anyone but him.

  63. 63.

    Chris

    @low-tech cyclist:

    According to a southern friend of mine, it’s pretty much just a social club where people gripe about the good old days.

    The real hardcore ones have moved onto the militia movement, whose generic libertarian/Christian/patriotic rhetoric is more socially acceptable and who aren’t instantly marked as bad guys by something as cliched as the white sheets.

  65. 65.

    Forum Transmitted Disease

    Why is it that they didn’t do better in the 1930s out of the Great Depression (like the Nazis did)? It’s not for lack of trying, Gerald L. K. Smith and Charles Coughlin did everything they could to mainstream the “economy was crashed by Jews, make war on them!” idea.

    Was it because the New Dealers made enough concessions to white power that not enough people felt like “their” country was being “taken” from them? Was the economy desperate enough that people rewarded liberals for making it better? Were the KKK types’ ties to traditional elites tainting them by association?

    @Chris: I think the answer to the first part, and partly to the second, is that the Klan had already shit the bed big time by the time the economy went over the cliff.

    I don’t think the Dealers made any concessions to the WP folks, don’t think that was needed. And I don’t think that people were rewarding liberals for making the economy better – the liberals of the time didn’t much give a shit about black folk either. I think you nailed it with the third guess: a lot of “elites” had glommed on to the Klan movement back in the twenties, including Wilson himself IIRC, and I think that hurt an already dead movement even worse.

    Plus I’m betting that a lot of people didn’t have time for that horseshit, hard to make the meetings when you’re trying to scrounge enough food so that your family doesn’t starve another day. Had the government embraced them as a partner, started passing out food at Klan rallies like they did at the Nazi party rallies, that would have been a different story entirely. But the Klan was still a creature of the South, one that had lost almost all its power by the time FDR got into office, and let’s face it, FDR had very little use for Southern politicians, most of whom were trying to do nothing more than co-opt the New Deal into making some money on the side for themselves.

  66. 66.

    Xenos

    Quatloos? Let’s not be starting a Butlerian Jihad.

    (I know, I know. You come up with a better transition to that joke.)

  67. 67.

    scav

    @Forum Transmitted Disease: In re: White Sales.

    @Amir Khalid: Not much. Whites whine a lot, tend towards obesity, have few useful skills that don’t involve shopping, and finding one these days who knows how to do manual labor is damn near impossible.

    On the other hand, they make excellent White Noise Machines so that one can concentrate on getting the real work done.

  68. 68.

    scav

    @scav: Must admit, usually a little bit on the high pitched winey end of the spectrum, although their tears mode is a soothing one.

  69. 69.

    stickler

    @Forum Transmitted Disease: Wait, not so fast:

    I don’t think the Dealers made any concessions to the WP folks, don’t think that was needed.

    The New Deal would have been dead, dead, dead if FDR had pushed harder on civil rights. It only passed Congress because white Southern senators made sure that the programs didn’t do as much for African Americans as they did for whites. Just look at Social Security: when it was introduced, it specifically excluded farm laborers and domestic servants. Hmmm, wonder who filled those jobs in the 1930s South?

  71. 71.

    Woodrowfan

    The Klan got a bit of a rebirth in the 1930s, but not much. The scandals of the 20s had turned off too many people. Coughlin’s National Union for Social Justice, which was essentially Fascist, had a hell of a lot of members though.

  72. 72.

    ? Martin

    @stickler: Absolutely correct. FDR refused to back the anti-lynching laws that northern liberals had introduced to Congress because he needed the southern members to support the New Deal:

    I did not choose the tools with which I must work. Had I been permitted to choose them I would have selected quite different ones. But I’ve got to get legislation passed by Congress to save America. The southerners by reason of the seniority rule in Congress are chairmen or occupy strategic places on most of the Senate and House committees. If I come out for the antilynching bill, they will block every bill I ask Congress to pass to keep America from collapsing. I just can’t take that risk.

    Things haven’t changed so much.

  74. 74.

    ? Martin

    Speaking of the Klan:

    A Riverside County judge on Monday found a 12-year-old boy guilty of second-degree murder in the shooting and killing of his father, neo-Nazi activist Jeffrey Hall, as he slept on the family’s living room couch.
    __
    He also was found guilty of a weapons charge, with the judge determining he knew right from wrong.
    __
    The youngster, just 10 years old when he pulled the trigger in May 2011, was charged as a juvenile and can be held in custody only until he is 23.

    Shooting your dad when you’re 10. Where does this slot in on the ‘gun safety’/’crazy people with guns’ debate spectrum?

  75. 75.

    The Red Pen

    I guess the Klan was a little more inclusive at times:

    Though Springfield was segregated and a hotbed of Ku Klux Klan activity, the Jewish population seems to have been hardly touched by anti-Semitism between the wars. Several of our respondents told stories about their fathers being asked to join the Klan by Klansmen oblivious to their organization’s anti-Semitism.

    Linky. Interesting history of the Jews in the Ozarks, if you like that kind of thing.

  76. 76.

    scav

    @? Martin: A triumph of home schooling and family values as he supposedly killed his dad because he (father) was possibly thinking of divorcing?

  78. 78.

    ? Martin

    @scav:

    A triumph of home schooling and family values as he supposedly killed his dad because he (father) was possibly thinking of divorcing?

    I think we need to infer a bit more – dad was apparently abusive, so a divorce would have raised the specter of him being stuck with dad and not having a stepmom around for protection:

    Hall won full custody when the boy was 3.

    It’s not so much that the kid knew right from wrong as that he likely couldn’t discern a likely reality from the bullshit that his dad filled his head with, and which a court unwittingly gave credibility to. The kid was already a dependent of the state, but he’d have to expect that eventually he’d wind up back with dad.

    What a complete waste of a person. But never forget, it’s Liberals that are Destroying America and the American Family™.

  79. 79.

    ? Martin

    And related, Glenn Beck is planning on building a libertarian utopia:

    On his program last night, Beck revealed that his intention to “go Galt” is quite literal, unveiling grandiose plans to create an entirely self-sustaining community called Independence Park that will provide its own food and energy, produce television and film content, host research and development, serve as a marketplace for products and ideas, while also housing a theme park and serving as a residential community.

    Everything you ever dreamed of, with no need for taxes or regulations, no doubt. I bet there’s some land outside of Waco he could develop on, unused since the last project of this type.

  81. 81.

    Chris

    @Forum Transmitted Disease:

    From what I know, the relationship between New Dealers and other economic liberals on the one hand and white power on the other was firmly embedded in “it’s complicated” territory. FDR and his administration mostly stuck to “don’t rock the boat” but wasn’t trusted by the Southern elites anyway.

    Huey Long, though not a New Dealer, is another interesting case. His relief efforts went to black people as well as white people, which pissed off the Klan and prompted them to run attack ads portraying him with his arms around black people promising them free rides (as Martin points out, things never change…) But he also partnered up with Coughlin and Smith in the Share Our Wealth movement, which eventually went full-bore white supremacist.

  82. 82.

    MaryRC

    @Woodrowfan: Scandals including the 1925 kidnapping and rape of a young woman, leading to her suicide, by D.C. Stephenson, Grand Dragon of the Klan in Indiana. His trial and conviction destroyed the Klan in Indiana, once one of the biggest chapters in the country.

  85. 85.

    Xenos

    @MaryRC: New Media played a role, too. Once WWII was over the Superman radio show had the man of steel fighting the Klan, revealing their secrets and exposing them to ridicule. It apparantly worked quite well.

  86. 86.

    Davis X. Machina

    it’s fairly apparent that Obama plans to enslave whitey in his second term,

    New bifocals, still not used to them. I read that first as “…it’s fairly apparent that Obama plans to enslave whiney in his second term,” and was ready to cheer him on.

    Death to Whiney!

  90. 90.

    Anya

    Focusing on KKK makes as much sense as Fox News’ fixation on the New Black Panther made. They’re not compatible but KKK is seriously done. Deranged racists have people in the US Congress who hold the country hostage for them so why focus on a has been organization and their desprate attention for relevance.

  91. 91.

    artem1s

    @? Martin:

    that will provide its own food and energy, produce television and film content, host research and development, serve as a marketplace for products and ideas,

    FSM, what a living hell this will be, if ever actualized. Like xtian camp, with guns.

  96. 96.

    The Red Pen

    @Certified Mutant Enemy:

    I’ll bet those most qualified to engage in R&D won’t be attracted to Beck’s utopian paradise.

    I dunno, there’s probably a lot of progress yet to be made in race science, and young-earth geology.

  97. 97.

    MikeJ

    @? Martin:

    Independence Park that will provide its own food and energy,

    So either they’ll use green energy, which they hate or they’ll build it on top of a coal mine. Coal mining is not a fun job. I’d guess that most of the people that would want to live there picture themselves as guards forcing others to do the mining.

  99. 99.

    J. Michael Neal

    @? Martin:

    Absolutely correct. FDR refused to back the anti-lynching laws that northern liberals had introduced to Congress because he needed the southern members to support the New Deal:

    He’s worse than Bush! He sold us out!

  100. 100.

    bemused

    @Certified Mutant Enemy:

    Does Beck plan to actually live with his family in his haven of freedom? Somehow I can’t picture this happening even if he got it going. He doesn’t look like a brave sort to me and I can’t imagine him plunking his family to live in what he knows very well would be a nest of cuckoos.

  102. 102.

    Chris

    @Anya:

    True.

    Like I said above – nowadays right-wingers with violent impulses who want to join that kind of organization join the local militia group.

    Always thought the militia movement was basically a rebranding effort for an age in which Klan and Nazi symbology had become noxious (kinda like the teabaggers being an attempt to rebrand the GOP after eight disastrous years).

  106. 106.

    MikeJ

    @J. Michael Neal: And look at everything he gave away! He didn’t actually repeal any old laws to make the bigots happy, he simply didn’t try to pass new laws that congress would have never passed any way. This surely makes him history’s greatest monster.

  107. 107.

    PeakVT

    Clarence Thomas spoke during oral arguments today. He did not, however, ask any questions or otherwise contribute anything germane to the case.

  113. 113.

    Woodrowfan

    @MaryRC: Mary, I know, I tell that story to my class. It didn’t end the Klan, but it did scare off the casual racists that joined because, you know, business contacts, and my buddy joined, etc, etc. It left the hard-core intact, but much smaller..

  114. 114.

    13th Generation

    I take umbrage at your use of the term “Whitey”. Guess its OK for you people to use it, it’s good to know in case I need to use a racial slur in the future.

    Going to watch Downton Abbey now.

  116. 116.

    AxelFoley

    @13th Generation:

    I take umbrage at your use of the term “Whitey”. Guess its OK for you people to use it, it’s good to know in case I need to use a racial slur in the future.

    LOL, with as much as the word “nigger” is used around here? You serious?

  118. 118.

    13th Generation

    @AxelFoley:
    So as a white guy, I can throw around the “N” word as easily as The angry black lady throws around words like whitey, cracker, etc.? Or is there a double standard that I’m unaware of?

  120. 120.

    Cain

    I don’t mind being a butler, but I’m not white. So I guess I could just help you pick out clothes. How about that?

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